Life after divorce - what is it like?

[Mongkok]

Funny...It is a big ticket item.How to afford?

Studio apt, approx $800k.
Unless she has cash, at her age, given her occupation, it's risky to take up a loan all by herself.
I suspect your husband and her have talked abt cashing out yours.
Given now she is single, property price is getting out of her reach, your husband is a timely catch if she wants to fulfil her dreams and at the same time reduce the loan repayment. She has did her sums. But under estimate her man's long term financial standing.
Her nex round may be discouraging your husband to fight for custody, encouraging him to fight for the sales proceed, reduce alimony and press for the selling of ur hse asap.
That means, time isn't on her side.

 

[Freedom-123]

Studio apt, approx $800k.
Unless she has cash, at her age, given her occupation, it's risky to take up a loan all by herself.
I suspect your husband and her have talked abt cashing out yours.
Given now she is single, property price is getting out of her reach, your husband is a timely catch if she wants to fulfil her dreams and at the same time reduce the loan repayment. She has did her sums. But under estimate her man's long term financial standing.
Her nex round may be discouraging your husband to fight for custody, encouraging him to fight for the sales proceed, reduce alimony and press for the selling of ur hse asap.
That means, time isn't on her side.

Think easier and faster for the 26 year old local girl to find someone single and can afford the studio condo with her

 

[Freedom-123]

Ya lo..that's wat I think also.. my husb say she is ok..she also say as long with my husb she is ok.. but all this say nw of cos she ok.. as long as I agree to share my husb 50% with her.. as I am considering this I have yet to response to my husb whether I agree or not.. nw she change he words.. n tell my husb say she wan all of him to herself.. so in order to do that I have to go

She is only 26. Youth is on her side
Why does she want to share a man unless the man is rich?
Let alone staying under the same roof as you and your kids

 

[HuayWen]

Studio apt, approx $800k.
Unless she has cash, at her age, given her occupation, it's risky to take up a loan all by herself.
I suspect your husband and her have talked abt cashing out yours.
Given now she is single, property price is getting out of her reach, your husband is a timely catch if she wants to fulfil her dreams and at the same time reduce the loan repayment. She has did her sums. But under estimate her man's long term financial standing.
Her nex round may be discouraging your husband to fight for custody, encouraging him to fight for the sales proceed, reduce alimony and press for the selling of ur hse asap.
That means, time isn't on her side.

Joy...Play the waiting game if that's the case.And she will not achieve her ends eventually.

 

[Freedom-123]

All your ex's gf wants to be with you ex
My ex's gf makes it clear that she will go back to China or HK

 

[HuayWen]

All your ex's gf wants to be with you ex
My ex's gf makes it clear that she will go back to China or HK

Go back for all we care...Just leave the cash and assets behind.

 

[JT01]

Studio apt, approx $800k.
Unless she has cash, at her age, given her occupation, it's risky to take up a loan all by herself.
I suspect your husband and her have talked abt cashing out yours.
Given now she is single, property price is getting out of her reach, your husband is a timely catch if she wants to fulfil her dreams and at the same time reduce the loan repayment. She has did her sums. But under estimate her man's long term financial standing.
Her nex round may be discouraging your husband to fight for custody, encouraging him to fight for the sales proceed, reduce alimony and press for the selling of ur hse asap.
That means, time isn't on her side.

This morning I ask my husb if he did b getting a flat with her outside.. he say mayb not nw. He might rent a unit with her.. n he still ask me to accept her into my house and say she will pay household money to me.. n we 3 will support the house.. she can also help do house work n teach my kids

 

[JT01]

Think easier and faster for the 26 year old local girl to find someone single and can afford the studio condo with her

Ya.. that's what I think also.. but she die die wan to stick with my husb.. she say she die die dun let go

 

[JT01]

She is only 26. Youth is on her side
Why does she want to share a man unless the man is rich?
Let alone staying under the same roof as you and your kids

Ya.. dat y I also dunno wat she thinking.. she love my husb as she say he fit the criteria of what a boyfriend she wants to have.. got height.. gentle.. same interest.. blah blah..

 

[HuayWen]

Don't listen to his crazy ideas.I cannot advise this but I am sorry to say that you have to leave him.

It is unbelievable.What kind of family unit is this?

 

[HuayWen]

Dat mean dun divorce? But my husb will share 3days overnight with her.. n he will keep asking me to accept her..

Sharing is no no.Give him a ultimatum.Either me or her.

Now we are in a fix.

 

[JT01]

Don't listen to his crazy ideas.I cannot advise this but I am sorry to say that you have to leave him.

It is unbelievable.What kind of family unit is this?

Ya lor.. I can't believe also.. he say is complicated like this.. he also know one mountain cannot keep 2 tigers. But he think can work.. cos he always think this woman very simple.. mean no harm.. she just wan me to accept her.. she not mean one.. ask me dun think of her till so mean..

 

[JT01]

Sharing is no no.Give him a ultimatum.Either me or her.

Now we are in a fix.

I did told him.. is me or her.. he say he can't chose cos he love both of us.. so wan me to accept her in n 'grow' the family.. *faint*

 

[HuayWen]

Maybe this woman poisoned his mind...This case and woman not simple.

 

[HuayWen]

Maybe this woman poisoned his mind...This case and woman not simple.

I did told him.. is me or her.. he say he can't chose cos he love both of us.. so wan me to accept her in n 'grow' the family.. *faint*

Is there a way to push the divorce through?Did you ask the lawyer?

 

[JT01]

Maybe this woman poisoned his mind...This case and woman not simple.

Ya.. dat y.. my husb keep asking me to accept her.. say she nw only waiting for me to accept her.. she wish I can really accept her

 

[JT01]

Is there a way to push the divorce through?Did you ask the lawyer?

Not sure if can push thru without contest.. I nw gg to the lawyer.. got appt this morning.. with 2 lawyers to b exact.. to get more opinion

 

[HuayWen]

Tell him to go to hell.

Don't let her into your house.Once you do,your house will know no peace any longer.

 

[JT01]

Tell him to go to hell.

Don't let her into your house.Once you do,your house will know no peace any longer.

I won't wan her inside my hse.. once come in wan to ask her go den difficult le.. I told my husb she will slowly ask for more. First step is to make me agree n accept her n let her into the hse.. once agree den everything can b plan later.. he dun believe.. he say she not like this.. she dun think like this.. blah blah.. as if I am the evil one say her till v bad like this..

 

[Mongkok]

This morning I ask my husb if he did b getting a flat with her outside.. he say mayb not nw. He might rent a unit with her.. n he still ask me to accept her into my house and say she will pay household money to me.. n we 3 will support the house.. she can also help do house work n teach my kids

let's analyse this..
my interpretation as follow:
1. with the intention to rent a unit with her (not for her), he intend to live a life with her. that means they have plannings for future, without you.
2. unless she is renting a unit outside, if not, why so desperate to stay 'together'?
3. Earlier you mentioned she wanted the condo and man. now she is ok to share a space with you, pay for household money, support the house and teach the kid?! then how does he explain point 1? Ok... this gal is good w man. she is extremely good w your man. one step at a time. Baby step.

like i have commented in other post. Protect your kids, fiercely. Draw very clear lines. (u know what line we are talking abt..)

you should have know your positioning by now.

Btw, keep your ears open, keep asking (ask husband, talk to friend, talk to anyone) and listen attentively and pick up vital info. you need to adjust your strategy along the way.

Stay firm, sit tight, the show is starting.

 

[HuayWen]

I won't wan her inside my hse.. once come in wan to ask her go den difficult le.. I told my husb she will slowly ask for more. First step is to make me agree n accept her n let her into the hse.. once agree den everything can b plan later.. he dun believe.. he say she not like this.. she dun think like this.. blah blah.. as if I am the evil one say her till v bad like this..

If it is the time to be stubborn,it is the time to be right now.

The battle is starting.You need to be alert and adjust your plans according to the situation.

Like what Mongkok said,you are the last line of defense in the gateway of your home.Protect your home and kids.

Let the lawyer know the full details and let him advise you accordingly.

 

[JT01]

let's analyse this..
my interpretation as follow:
1. with the intention to rent a unit with her (not for her), he intend to live a life with her. that means they have plannings for future, without you.
2. unless she is renting a unit outside, if not, why so desperate to stay 'together'?
3. Earlier you mentioned she wanted the condo and man. now she is ok to share a space with you, pay for household money, support the house and teach the kid?! then how does he explain point 1? Ok... this gal is good w man. she is extremely good w your man. one step at a time. Baby step.

like i have commented in other post. Protect your kids, fiercely. Draw very clear lines. (u know what line we are talking abt..)

you should have know your positioning by now.

Btw, keep your ears open, keep asking (ask husband, talk to friend, talk to anyone) and listen attentively and pick up vital info. you need to adjust your strategy along the way.

Stay firm, sit tight, the show is starting.

Think my husb analyse with her say not enough to buy condo.. cos my husb also cannot afford.. so nw my husb plan is for me to accept her into my house.. n live tgt with us.. she willing to do anything for me n my house so long I can accept her n let her b with my husb

 

[HuayWen]

Think my husb analyse with her say not enough to buy condo.. cos my husb also cannot afford.. so nw my husb plan is for me to accept her into my house.. n live tgt with us.. she willing to do anything for me n my house so long I can accept her n let her b with my husb

No,you cannot accept this stupid arrangement.Never agree to it.

Never say yes.BTW,how old is your husband?

 

[Freedom-123]

Ya.. dat y I also dunno wat she thinking.. she love my husb as she say he fit the criteria of what a boyfriend she wants to have.. got height.. gentle.. same interest.. blah blah..

You have been talking to her?

 

[Mongkok]

one more point,
this gal is 'listening' and adjusting her strategy too.

Be a listener from now. ask and listen. Don't contribute, don't share your pov. your husband is standing w her now. he is also relating info abt you to her.

You don't always need to be vocal to make your stand. A firm "NO' is enough.

keep your attitude in check. they are monitoring your reaction and response and searching for your weakness.

 

[HuayWen]

one more point,
this gal is 'listening' and adjusting her strategy too.

Be a listener from now. ask and listen. Don't contribute, don't share your pov. your husband is standing w her now. he is also relating info abt you to her.

You don't always need to be vocal to make your stand. A firm "NO' is enough.

keep your attitude in check. they are monitoring your reaction and response and searching for your weakness.

Good point,MK.

Just a firm NO to both of them is enough.

 

[Freedom-123]

This morning I ask my husb if he did b getting a flat with her outside.. he say mayb not nw. He might rent a unit with her.. n he still ask me to accept her into my house and say she will pay household money to me.. n we 3 will support the house.. she can also help do house work n teach my kids

He is trying to save money

 

[JT01]

No,you cannot accept this stupid arrangement.Never agree to it.

Never say yes.BTW,how old is your husband?

My husb is 36

 

[Mongkok]

Think my husb analyse with her say not enough to buy condo.. cos my husb also cannot afford.. so nw my husb plan is for me to accept her into my house.. n live tgt with us.. she willing to do anything for me n my house so long I can accept her n let her b with my husb

your husband just crashed her condo dream... nex target is your hse.

 

[JT01]

You have been talking to her?

No.. my husb told me.. I cannot stand the sight of her name.. not to mention talk to her.. I think I will scold her if I were to talk to her

 

[JT01]

your husband just crashed her condo dream... nex target is your hse.

Dat y need to chk with lawyer.. have chk with hdb n the officer say if dun return him cpf den I can take loan n keep the hse.. he ask me to find lawyer n fight for this

 

[bbdust81]

How is everyone over the weekend??

He came home on Sat after staying out for 4 nites...We still talk to each other, behave as normal and even had sex together..But the issue is he eject outside...

 

[Freedom-123]

one more point,
this gal is 'listening' and adjusting her strategy too.

Be a listener from now. ask and listen. Don't contribute, don't share your pov. your husband is standing w her now. he is also relating info abt you to her.

You don't always need to be vocal to make your stand. A firm "NO' is enough.

keep your attitude in check. they are monitoring your reaction and response and searching for your weakness.

Maybe he is also convincing the 26 year old to stay with you and your kids
Nowadays, youngsters do not even want to stay with in-laws, and want to get a part-time helper for the housework.
She is willing to stay with you and help you with your housework and kids, and shares the household expenses?

Your hubby is really testing his luck with both women, as he wants to save the rental yet wants both ladies.

How is his financial situation?

 

[JT01]

Maybe he is also convincing the 26 year old to stay with you and your kids
Nowadays, youngsters do not even want to stay with in-laws, and want to get a part-time helper for the housework.
She is willing to stay with you and help you with your housework and kids, and shares the household expenses?

Your hubby is really testing his luck with both women, as he wants to save the rental yet wants both ladies.

How is his financial situation?

My husb financial also so so only.. his pay is about lower den mine.. he is trying to save yes.. since he has a share in this hse so he won't wan to spend money again outside for the flat..n also he will not have any money to do that.. as he says he will really need to eat bread if he does this..

 

[JT01]

Maybe he is also convincing the 26 year old to stay with you and your kids
Nowadays, youngsters do not even want to stay with in-laws, and want to get a part-time helper for the housework.
She is willing to stay with you and help you with your housework and kids, and shares the household expenses?

Your hubby is really testing his luck with both women, as he wants to save the rental yet wants both ladies.

How is his financial situation?

My husb doesn't have much money.. his pay is lower than mine by abit.. as this hse he has share.. he won't wan to spend extra outside to get a flat as he also won't have money to do so.. so he ask me to accept her in so he can save on buying flat outside..

 

[janey09]

How is everyone over the weekend??

He came home on Sat after staying out for 4 nites...We still talk to each other, behave as normal and even had sex together..But the issue is he eject outside...

Oh dear. U still willing to let him enjoy best of both worlds?

My husb financial also so so only.. his pay is about lower den mine.. he is trying to save yes.. since he has a share in this hse so he won't wan to spend money again outside for the flat..n also he will not have any money to do that.. as he says he will really need to eat bread if he does this..

 

[bbdust81]

Our case is not due to 3rd party...

 

[Freedom-123]

My husb doesn't have much money.. his pay is lower than mine by abit.. as this hse he has share.. he won't wan to spend extra outside to get a flat as he also won't have money to do so.. so he ask me to accept her in so he can save on buying flat outside..

If I am the young lady, I will start looking out for the next guy who is single and can get a hdb or condo with me

 

[JT01]

If I am the young lady, I will start looking out for the next guy who is single and can get a hdb or condo with me

Ya lor.. I also think like this. Some more she still say she wan to get married.. hw can she if she is stuck in this affair?

 

[janey09]

Our case is not due to 3rd party...

But if not 3rd, where he mia for so many days

 

[janey09]

Ya lor.. I also think like this. Some more she still say she wan to get married.. hw can she if she is stuck in this affair?

Some women just like to go for married man. After the man, divorce they then break off. They like the winning feeling.

 

[bbdust81]

But if not 3rd, where he mia for so many days

He stay with his friend or outside budget hotel...

He suppose to stay out again today but surprisingly, he did not pack his bag last nite

 

[HuayWen]

Weekend was ok until Sunday,BB81...

Had a big fight in the house with adulterous pair when they came back.

Fortunately,the girls were not around to see Mommy change into a monster.

 

[HuayWen]

Some women just like to go for married man. After the man, divorce they then break off. They like the winning feeling.

In the end,the man is neither here nor there.

No money and no honey.

 

[JT01]

Nw my husb is saying ask me to try something riduculous.. let her in n try to work it out.. she can contribute hse hold allowance.. ask me to accept her in

 

[HuayWen]

Nw my husb is saying ask me to try something riduculous.. let her in n try to work it out.. she can contribute hse hold allowance.. ask me to accept her in

Keep saying no.

What can he do if you refuse to do it?

 

[Mongkok]

Nw my husb is saying ask me to try something riduculous.. let her in n try to work it out.. she can contribute hse hold allowance.. ask me to accept her in

Looks like it's more than it meets the eye.

 

[HuayWen]

Yes,more plots...If not how come so many patterns shown by them?

 

[Freedom-123]

Ya lor.. I also think like this. Some more she still say she wan to get married.. hw can she if she is stuck in this affair?

She can date a few at the same time

 

[Freedom-123]

Nw my husb is saying ask me to try something riduculous.. let her in n try to work it out.. she can contribute hse hold allowance.. ask me to accept her in

The lady must be screaming for a condo
She is a local - why so desperate to get a place