Hi all,
I have been reading posting on this thread since my first miscarriage in 2005. Just to share my long story and bring some hope to anyone out there.
I have a history of 3 mid trimester miscarriage since i was 22 yrs old at 22wks, 18 wks and 22 wks. All my babies were born alive and struggling but there was nothing i can do to save them as they were way too premature to survive.
First miscarriage happened and i was very lost as i didn't know what was happening as i was still very young at 22 yrs old.It just happened all of a sudden at night that i was having very bad bleeding. So my pte gynae recommended that i go back to a govt hosp since i am a healthcare worker and they will provide more detailed and better care. 2nd pregnancy i was very very lucky to meet Prof Mahesh Choolani even when i was under subsidised. He picked up that i had protein S deficiency and anti-thrombin III deficiency ( blood clotting problem) after knowing that i had a midterm miscarriage. He asked me to take aspirin and suggested i see a haematologist and see whether i need to be on blood thinner injections. But somehow somewhere there was miscommunication, I didn't get referred to a haematologist. I was only on aspirin and no further monitoring was done ( regretted taking subsidise as i was seeing different junior doctors every 2 weeks and it seems they do not know what to do). I had my 2nd miscarriage at 18 weeks in 2006. We were devastated and we asked to see Prof Mahesh, he suggested that to have better monitoring by him personally and since he knows about my condition and history, we upgraded to pte. Although we pay much more, we have never regretted this decision. I found out i was pregnant in 2008 while i was doing my advanced dip, i quit my course and stay at home to keep my pregnancy viable from 2 months onwards. I was under very good care and constant monitoring by Prof Mahesh himself, I was warded to hospital at wk18 whn i had preterm contraction, Prof Mahesh even came to check on me on weekends. but "man proposes, God disposes" Although i was on aspirin and blood thinner injection, miscarriage happened again at 22wks. After that miscarriage, we can see that Prof Mahesh was also very sad and disappointed, he shared our pain with us as he really wanted us to go home with a baby.
After so much heart wrenching and tears, we were really afraid to try for another baby,every visit back to Prof Mahesh office will end up with alot of tears and heartache. He comforted us and encourage us to try too, but if its too painful, we can opt for adoption or even surrogacy.
We really wanted a baby of our own so last year, we decided to go back to Prof Mahesh again to try. He referred us to the Recurrent Pregnancy Loss Clinic and a series of tests were done, since we were under pte, we did spent alot on the tests for me and my husband. We found out that I had PCOS and diabetes, i was very sad and disappointed, but Prof assured us that thats not a problem to worry.I was started on aspirin since we wanted to ttc.
After a few chemical pregnancy, We found out i was pregnant for real this year and since then i was under constant care by both Prof Mahesh and Dr Sheila Vasoo. I did my homework on finding out more about my condition as it is considered quite rare in asian context. We discussed our pregnancy management with them and they are very open to it. I started aspirin way before my pregnancy, and once i get a very faint positive, i went to see them. I was 3 wks pregnant, they could not see any sac so we waited, but we didn't want to take any chance since i have clotting problem, so Dr Sheila started me on blood thinner injection right away. I went back every week for blood test to make sure my HCG rises, scans every wk, i was warded for suspected ectopic at wk 5/6 since there was no hearbeat and sac but thank God my baby's sac appeared. After i was discharged, I saw Prof Mahesh every week at his clinic for scan and every few weeks to have my blood drawn to monitor my clotting problem. I also continued with seeing the Recurrent pregnancy loss clinic every month as that was when we get to see our haematologist Dr Sheila Vasoo. We continued to monitor my bld results. At wk 12, i broke down and cried because my bld results were really quite bad and the possibility of losing my baby hit us again. Prof encouraged us and told us not to we give up now, he really wanted us to go home with a baby. My husband was very supportive all these while. I stopped working the moment i knew i was pregnant.We discussed with Prof Mahesh and we will get admitted for observation from wk 18 or wk 20 onwards, as he knows its going to be a long stay, he even suggested we downgrade to subsidise during our stay. After constant and regular monitoring and adjusting of my injection dosage with the weekly and monthly clinic visits, we made it to week 19!@W saw Dr Sheila Vasoo, since our bld results not getting any better, we asked for a increase in dosage. We knew the risks involved like having a stroke, internal bleeding, losing my life just like that. I was admitted from wk 19 onwards which was last week of july. Staying in the hospital for the first week was hard, i was constantly crying,worried about the coming wk22 where i lost 2 of my babies, will i also lose this one in me when i hit that week? my husband was with me everyday comforting me and assuring me everything will be fine and we are in good hands. Prof came to visit me a few times a week to make sure i am alright and good, he also instructed his team doctors to inform him of my progression and make sure everything is good, He told me anything i can just call him directly on his handphone. With tears and fears, ups and downs from all the bld tests every week. I passed wk22, wk24, wk 26 and wk 28.Keep telling myself that everyday passed is a extra step to safety for our baby. Our primary target was to pass wk 28 as that will be when if my baby was born he will have a good chance of survival. Our prayers were answered, Now we are at wk 30 going to 31!, another 9 more weeks and our precious son will be arriving. Prof Mahesh even bought me a box of chocolate to celebrate me passing wk 28 marking! Now my husband and I are aiming for at least wk 36 so that our baby will not need a incubator when he is born. I am currently still staying in the hospital since july and am glad i am here as we fight on for our son. Yes, thats alot of money spent and hospital bills will haunt us after our discharge. But money can be earned again, its tough but all these are worth it.Nothing can be compared with holding our son safe in our hands. We are really so glad and grateful that God let us met Prof Mahesh and his team. Without him we won't be here where we are with our son. We are going home with a healthy baby in our arms alive and kicking safely in our arms soon.
All those trying for a baby out there, please don't lose hope, I have been through despair and even thought of ending my life too when i lost my babies one after another,blaming myself that its because of my blood clotting problem that cause the death of our babies. We kept telling ourselves, maybe God doesn't want us to have our own baby or its not time yet.
There will be light at the end of the tunnel, we must keep ourselve hopeful in order to have a chance!
