Support group - Miscarriages

Celestine ,

Don't worry , everything I leave to hubby to talk to his parents .. But becos my son also eat the rice in the rice cooker , so I got pissed cos when casual talk , she also say rice smell and taste sour ... But i dunno why she still choose to cook yet she know .. Haiz .. Speechless .. All complains I will ony speak up to hubby after I close the door ...
 


GBOB

thanks for Sharing... i saw this link before but i haven't really read in detailed... will take this chance to read through...

Chris...

thanks for reminding... actually the sauce thingy never cross my mind until you mentioned it... especially those Chicken rice chilli sauce which is my favourite and i always took alot...


Think i officially fall sick liao... flu, cough, stomach problem all come.... exactly same as what happened one year ago after i took multivitamins...
 
Hi ladies,

Oh dear cannot take crabs... Then it might be the cause of my mc... haha... I took so much on one of the night....

Have not been in the thread. Was so busy last week. My son is down with diarrehea, vomiting and fever and rush him down to hospital and later kk. In the end he was hospitalised for 3days and now he is fine. Then follow by some events at home... auntie wedding and bil's ROM...
 
Dear ladies,

May not be familiar to most of you here...but this thread was a source of great comfort and support for me back in April 2010...

Just want to tell u ladies not to despair or give up... I have successfully popped in Aug 2012 and my little boi is now 5 weeks old..

It can get disheartening as we do not "see" results months after month.. or hear negative comments from our close ones... but do hang in there...

Even after I discovered this pregnancy, there was always this fear that i will lose it again throughout the whole period.. I know its not healthy but really cannot help it.. so my advise is to get a good gynae who understands your fear and is willing to give you his/her time to make sure that your bb is growing well... and takes the necessary precaution..

Babydust to all of you... jia youz!!
 
tomomi, ur food situation is the same as mine! never thot tt there r pple who leave rice inside the rice cooker overnight... i try v hard not to eat the 24h old rice (there's a timer on the rice cooker), i just take out my portion n then refrigerate or eat pasta instead. got time to do tt for ur son?

they do tt not only with rice, w everything else also! sometimes mil seasons the chicken to b fried, n leaves it in e fridge for several days, even weeks. then they take out a few pieces when they want to fry it. got a lot of stories abt it lah, but basically they eat lots of chilli, spices n lime, so even if the food is spoilt, u oso cannot smell/taste it coz overpowered alr.

i also complain to hb, but then he told me both his grannies did tt too. they did live to a ripe old age, but my stomach cmi...
 
Chris, good point, mabbe i shd stop taking e sauces.

GBOB, thanks for sharing... i'm so glad that there's the internet n forums...
here's another site which helped me quite a lot
http://pregnancyloss.info

especially this answer in the faq.
http://www.pregnancyloss.info/feelings_you_have.htm#crazy

Chatty, congrats on ur baby, thanks for sharing the good news. did u do any tests before u tried again?

Ling, actually my SIL ate lots of crabs when she was pregnant w my nephew. she said she couldn't stop craving for them. he's growing fine, smarter than his older sis. i dun think the crabs caused m/c

the whole seafood thing is quite contradictory to me somehow... my hb's family believes tt eating lots of seafood during pregnancy will lead to smart children. as my mil likes to boast tt my hb is v smart coz she ate lots of seafood last time. but also hearsay cannot eat crabs n sotong, dunno which one is correct..
 
Thanks Chatty for sharing your story...
its great motivation for us ....

Mich,
i can totally relate to the pregnancy loss info !!
i really feel exactly the same the very initial period when i lost my bb as what was stated in the link... in fact, i bought forget-me-not seeds to plant in memory of him.. (not planted yet though)

Ling,
I believe the list that i shared , should only be for reference.... but don't blame yourself.. it may not be due to crabs... miscarraige is like a profound knowledge... we will never know what happen unless we test for it...
 
Ladies,

Think i was very bad yesterday, feel kinda guilty.. We had our weekly family dinner at MIL's yesterday.. We started dinner first cos BIL and his wife held up by work and would be late.. When they arrived, first thing BIL said to us excitedly was 'it's 37 weeks! Will pop anytime soon!'.. I was like 'ohhh.. Okie..' and didn't say anything else.. I was wondering if i shld have acted more excited.. If it was my fren, i would be jumping up and hugging her already, but i'm not very close to them.. And i guess also cos my EDD was 2 wks apart from hers, i'm not really celebrating.. But anyway, just feel kinda bad now..
 
min81,

I think its normal. One of my SIL EDD is 2 weeks later than me. I dun want to go back in-law place cos its hurts. Yet she posted bb's photos all over FB and even watapps me. I ignore them all. I din reply her nor did I like any of her photos. To me, they are too insensitive when handling situations like this. When I mc, they did not even say a single word to me. So, why should I share their happiness?
 
Princessleopard,

Ohh.. Were u ever close to that SIL? If she knows about ur mc and how u're feeling, she could have been a little more sensitive and not watsapp u baby photos..

My this new SIL is quite ok, but kinda quiet so we don't talk much.. She asked after me after my mc, and also watsapp me to show her concern after my lap.. But i don't like my BIL.. Actually, my BIL was already married few yrs when he met her.. He committed adultery, cohabited with her a couple of yrs before divorce was finalised.. Then she got preggy just few wks before the wedding.. My BIL is not a very nice person, but bb come right time, wk going well and getting richer and richer.. Sometimes just feel unfair i guess.. I'm not a wonderful person but i devoted past 10 yrs to wking with special needs children from low income family.. I just hope for a healthy childnow..

But ah, yesterday my hubby worse, didn't even bother to react, just carried on with his dinner.. So maybe i'm not too bad?? Hehe..
 
Min, actually u dun haf to feel guilty
if it was me, i won't even say oh ok.
Even my fren come telling me abt her swollen leg due to pregnancy, i can't be bothered to comment, bcos i know she just wanna haolian.. i mean its ok to haolian but y choose me when u know wat happened to me....i really feel this way... i jus don't want to get hurt
 
Actually i felt really upset when one of my pregnant friend invited me to her daughter bday party... i told her i not attending bcos still within three months after my miscarriage... she insist that she dun mind the pantang, keep asking me to come, refuse to give up. I continue to reject then she still didn't give up, even tell me dun give present also nvm, just come... really upsetting
 
Jhw, u r very welcome. Just feel it's quite informative & shd share
happy.gif
oh, no offence but your friend is a little bit insensitive to your feelings leh....tsk...

Mich, thanks for the links dear
happy.gif


Dear Chatty, thanks for your encouragement n congrats on your prince
happy.gif
 
Jhw,

Wah your fren really wants u there.. Maybe she didn't want you to feel bad or paiseh that you can't go cos of your mc, didn't want you to think she's pantang.. I guess she got kinda over zealous in trying to convince you to go..
 
hmm maybe i should rephrase my sentence..i meant to say eat with caution lah..not say cannot totally don't eat the sauce cos very hard mah..chicken rice not complete without chilli sauce but then hmm..if you see the stall usually lots of people then think should be fine lah..it's just that i tot about the time back home, i patronized a few stalls and got a tad tummy upset..one stall was a hokkien fried prawn noodles stall near sims ave, i 'caught' the hawker giving me a plate of luke warm noodles..apparently it was pre fried! And then another one indian stall next to dr zou in amk who used leftover meat from the fridge to cook mee goreng for me..hmm..


tomomi
huh..leave outside for 10hrs already...hmm..anyway to make up excuses to eat out instead or maybe cook yourself? Simple food lah since you working and no time, say boil a quick soup and fry veggie + plain rice..not more than 1 hr can eat already..

chatty
thanks for your story, it gives me some glitter of hope hehe..*bling bling*

jhw
huh..is your this friend very close to you? or some distance friend?

Min
no lah don't blame yourself that you're not that responsive over it..if i were you i'll be the same too, i feel don't know what to say loh..i'll probably just keep my mouth shut or just like what you did..just say oh ok..or just shrug my shoulders..
 
min, dun need to feel guilty about it i think, i also din talk much to e hb's cousin's wife when she was still pregnant. even when we meet at the gatherings also just smile n say hi n bye n tt's it. i think nothing much about it. my edd was supposed to b 1 mth after hers...
 
princessleopard, actually my hb's family also din really ask about how i was the first time i m/c. its a long story, but after i returned from a trip w my hb, they treated me like i never got pregnant. but its better than getting reminded of it all e time.

jhw, is the fren who haolian abt her swollen foot the same one as the one who invited u to the party? but in most cases, i think tt most pple just dun understand how we feel after m/c, n dunno how to react or wat to say...
 
min81,

We used to be very close. She confide everything with me all these years. SHe is not too bad as a person just a bit selfish. So, she suddenly cut away from me since my mc.
 
mich,

Perhaps that is a good way to forget. Lucky you.
happy.gif

Its a nightmare for you after my mc. Cos my MIL keep blaming me its my fault. She finds all kind of excuses to blame it on me.
 
Hi ladies,
just had a mc last weekend at start of wk 6
sad.gif
its been an emotional rollercoaster...so i was looking out for a support group to get through this phrase..
wanted to find out, how long did you gals waited before ttc again?
thanks!
 
Hi Rian,

Sorry for your loss. Hug...

When to start ttc, really depends. Some ppl said better wait 3 months. For me, when my first AF came, gynae gave me green light to start ttc as everything is normal. TCM also gave me green light to start. So, I start after the first AF.
 
Hi Princessleopard,
i was reading the thread and realised we are under the same gynae
happy.gif
She's a nice lady.. I felt better after seeing her..Had a really bad encounter during my emergency visit to KK when i started spotting...

Quite some confusion..tcm told me 3 mths, gynae told me 1 mth, and kk doc says i can start this mth..
I really hope to start trying soon, as its so tough to have good news
sad.gif
 
Hi Rian, sorry for your loss. **hugs**

I started TTC after the 1st normal Af cycle after the MC.... My gynae told me can start as soon as I feel I am ready
 
Hi Rian, sorry to hear about ur loss, hug...

my gynae told me tt i could ttc after the first AF comes. he did u/s to check tt everything was out in e follow-up checkup.
 
thanks gals,
Yup, everything is out
sad.gif
..im on antibiotics, supplements and tcm herbs...thinking if i shld stop the antibiotics..dun feel good taking them
 
princessleopard, ya its good in a way, a bit weird coz i know they discussed it when i wasn't ard, then a bit of blame come out when after they saw the cousin's new baby...

my mum was sad about it n then tell me next time dun do this n tt. then she also asked if the house fengshui clashes with me or something, n asked if i want to move to niang jia. but if move to niang jia, then how to ttc? feel so worried tt my risk will increase is i wait some more...
 
Rian,

Sorry to hear about your loss.. Hugz..

I only started ttc after 3rd AF cos the first 2 were rather erratic..It depends on individual.. Just rest well first and check with ur gynae later.. I think u shld not stop the antibiotics, they are to help prevent infection..
 
Rian,

So coincidence!! Yes, she is a nice lady. She did your D&C?

I know you want to start ttc soon, but sometimes things cannot be rush. Now your health is more important. If first AF come back normal, perhaps doc will give you green light to start ttc. Concentrate on your health first.
 
Mich,

Whatever they want to say, just let them be. We cannot be bother with everything. Life have to move on. Now, important thing is health, relationship with hubby, rainbow baby and a happy life.

You stay with your in-law? So, did not seek for fengshui when you move in?
 
thanks ladies.. will try to convince myself to wait and nurse myself back to health first..
princessleopard,i didn't do D&C. It was a natural pass out few hrs after i went to KKH to check, as it was wee hrs in the weekend.
 
Princessleopard, ya, agree w u, trying to keep myself occupied n not worry abt them.

No consultation... They dun seem to believe fengshui. Did u stay w ur in laws last time?

Rian, if I'm not wrong, once u start a course of antibiotics, it's better to finish it.
 
Sorry ladies ,

Only choose to say now cos it was a demoralizing pregnancy in the beginning .. So I only choose to say once I reach 12 weeks ..

Let me share my journey of how my rheumatologist work with my gynea ..
I have been instructed to be on baby aspirin before I am given the green light to ttc .. I got to admit this baby was a bingo .. Me and hubby did not expect it will come so soon and at that moment I am very focus on my yoga and lifestyle .. And ttc was one of the last thing ..
I knew I am pregnant the day i miss my period becos of my flaring up of joints again .. Was in pain and I suspect something is wrong so I went to take the test .. Was already in pain a few days before my period but I refused to go to my doctor to jab or take painkiller .. So somehow I need to thank my joint problem .. I went down to my gynea the next day as I was been instructed to be on progestrone the moment I know I am pregnant .. 2 per day .. But my joint pains was there for more than 2 weeks .. Which is my swollen wrist and also sniff neck ( only can endure cos rheumatologist say I am not allowed to even take Panadol ) ..
A few days later I began spotting .. Went down to gynea the next day and she gave me a jab .. Nothing was being found when scan so blood test taken to check HCG and need to go down 2 days later to take HCG level again .. Spotting did not stop for next 1 week and got a bit heavier , so went down as out-patient for my gynea go check me cos it's after her clinic hrs .. Gave me another jab and increase my dosage to 3 times a day .. That's when spotting start to stop .. But spot again 4-5 days later and it's late at night , so I suggested to go Kk instead .. ( cos gynea as out-patient cost me $300 plus , Kk only $110 .. But I will not go Kk again though it's cheap , their gynea will make ur heart sink even deeper .. Cos every question u ask , they will say , dunno ~ maybe ~ not sure~ too early to know~ etc ) after that , 3 days later I went to my gynea again .. She have me another jab again ..
I have been on bed rest for 2 months .. Except going for gynea/rheumatologist appointment .. When at 6 weeks , suppose to go down to my rheumatologist .. He suggested I need to continue my baby aspirin but no need his (hypirin? Sorry I dunno the spelling ) injection unless baby is not growing to date or baby not doing well .. So on and off I need to monitor both side .. The day my rheumatologist took my blood is to monitor my auto immune , and hope it does not come back during this period ..
I am glad spotting stopped and managed to complete my 12 weeks .. I skipped all baby shower/baby birthday all these while .. I Did not even tell my brother and my Mum And only choose to tell those which I need help from due to this pregnancy ..

All of u bring me big comfort during this period of time and I really thank all of u .. Hubby might be the one which I can talk to the most but he is not the one to understand me the most regarding certain things ..

I hope I am still welcomed here ..
 
Tonomi, wow! What a roller coaster ride u had there... Glad u finally made it! Congrats on your 12 weeks milestone! N of cos, u r very welcome here!!!

May I know what is rheumatologist?
 
mich,

No, I did not stay with them. Staying with them is not my main concern but its my sil who got shotgun marriage and stay with them. I dun think I can face her drama everyday. So, from the start, I din stay with them.

Tonomi,

Congrats!!!Catching your baby dust.
You strike within 3 months after mc?
So happy to hear good news here.
happy.gif
 
GBOB,

Er , rheumatologist are for those with auto immune problem .. Some examples are rheumatoid arthritis , thyroid , SLE lupus .. Cos I am been tested to have ANA positive after my miscarriage, so my gynea referred me to him ..

Princess leopard ,

Nono .. Abt 5 months later ? But first 3-4 months I am busy with Tcm to adjust my body then I had all the testing by the rheumatologist .. I am not given a green light to ttc till the 5th month ..

Actually I am still very stressed up till today though it passed the 12 weeks mark ..
 
tonomi,

I think its normal, for us who had been through mc, will be more tensed up during the next pregnancy.

cheryl,

Tomorrow night is 6-9pm.
 
Tomomi
Congratulations!!! so nice to hear good news the moment i step in...Wish me luck as i m starting to ttc next mth!!!!

Been sleeping whole day today due to sick... the after effect of prenatal vits haha...
so many posts to catch up... let me read tomorrow ... got to sleep now haha...
 
wah so good news ah tomomi!! Congrats and thanks for the baby dust *taking some to rub on my tummy* lol but eh..your story ..your spotted a tad lot yeah? But i supposed it's not accompanied by cramps? what colour was it and the frequency and amount? Tot i ask cos to be prepared should i bleed (touchwood!Choi!) next time haha
 
Wa!!! Tomomi Congrat!!!
Finally some good news here... Horrey!!
Thanks for ur baby dust... Rub rub my tummy. Haha!!
 


You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

I
Support Group for TTC
Replies
4
Views
4K
Mei ben
M
C
Running Through Pregnancy
Replies
0
Views
287
Clehane
C
J
News mums needed! How mothers' sensitivity affects postpartum experiences
Replies
0
Views
696
jtf
J
J
News mums needed! How mothers' sensitivity affects postpartum experiences
Replies
0
Views
314
jtf
J
B
How to move on from betrayal and expose infidelity?
Replies
3
Views
3K
margret
M

Back
Top