Support group - Miscarriages

oceans · Jun 26, 2004

How's everybody today?

It is weekend! Hurray!!

Jujube, Pageup, Miao and Ariella, so sorry to learn about your recent loss!

It is not easy to come to terms with the fact that our baby just left us like that... But give yourself sometime to grieve. We are all here to listen and support each other!

I did find myself better talking to the gals here.

oceans · Jun 26, 2004

Tubby, how are you feeling today?

Hope u are feeling fine. At this moment, i still dun have a gynae in mind. Was thinking of either stick to KK, or go to Dr Kowa frm Mt E or Dr Koh (i think) frm Mt A/TMC with a clinic at Toa Payoh. Well, i just see how lah... Would probably have to decide in another 4 wks' time.

Curly and Jujube, think both of you have such a nasty boss.

How could they be so insentive. Jujube, i think it is too much of ur boss to say something so sarcastic as to "You really wanna get preggie again?

I meant what's wrong with ttc-ing agin when u reover!!

Curly, i guess being working in such an enviorment, if financial is not an issue, i support ur decision to resign.

I think this is really discrimmation

and cant we like write to MOM abt such bad practise?

Your boss thot here is China meh, asking for birth contrl...

Tiny, the problem at KK AMC scan is not only they dun allow hubby to be inside, the machine is also not movable. So when doing v-scan, the position is in such that u cant see a single thing! The doc jus print a copy and said, "Nah, this is ur bb!"

Well, anyway, i just glad that everything is ok. How u doing, Princess Tiny?

Java, i feel happy

for you that everything is fine and you can see the sac.

It is true that at this stage, any spotting, be it brown, pinkish or worst, red, can be frightening. Wow, u actually lost 2kg

! So nice, i gained 4kg

So sad.. think tummy is quite obvious till pple either commented that i got pregnant, or that i have put on so much weight!

oceans · Jun 26, 2004

Millie, today is weekend! Hope u resting well at home!!

Regardin my last visit to KK, i wasn't sure she was a trainee, but i think it cant be so good to let me have 2 sonagrapher right?

But it is okay lah, cos she was in fact very gentle with me.

Compared to that specialist

who scan me during my last pregnancy, that one who scold me rude

after my D&C and never prescribe me hormone pills despite spotting, she was much gentle and most imptly, she is a gal!

Hahaa....

Odie, when is ur AF coming? I start to gan cheong for you leh!! Cos after that u will start to ttc-ing

liao!

But cannot stress u cos i read that stress would not do good when ttc-ing!

Tiantian, despite the fact that ur last pregnancy did not stay long with you

, however, do you know that it is an indication that even as low as 1% chances of conceiving, u still succeeded!! I dont know, i just find that it is a miracle and so, maybe now, u must really take care of ur body. Dont give up hope and rest well!

Jus, got guai guai take those medicine?

tiny · Jun 26, 2004

Hi Ocean, I'm fine thanks! Hope my little one is, too. Haven't been feeling having any ms this week, so I also worry sometimes! Hope I'm just one of those lucky ones who don't suffer from ms. Once more week till I get to find out...

Jujube, Pageup, Miao and Ariella, glad u found us. We've all got different stories but have one thing in common...and for some of us, many days, weeks, months have past, and we are all getting on much better than it first happened. The memories are always there, but time does heal, and the pain gets a bit less each passing day. Most of us find the strength to try again from those in this thread. It's sad that this thread has suddenly "expanded", but I guess it also means that there's more support.

As for jujube, did u see the microwave i gave Curly for her boss? Use it for yours too!

These people deserve to be POPPED!

And Pageup, family support is really so important. Treasure it and appreciate each one of them. It's times like this when you realise that you are stronger than you think u are because there are people who love & care for u.

Ariella, we had different experiences with bleeding after d&c. Some of us bled more & for a longer time, and some less. If I remember correctly, Millie did not bleed much after her d&c, and just had light spotting after that. As for me, I bled for abt a week and continued to spot for quite a long time. (had to buy lots of panty liners!) I guess it varies & it's all normal. As long as there are no persistant cramps, it should be fine. Rest whenever u can and don't strain yourself. Other than that, you can go about with ur usual stuff.

miao2 · Jun 26, 2004

Hi Pageup,Ariella & Ocean,
Thank you so much for the well wishing. I've indeed felt a lot better after reading all your postings.
Just like Folic, I've even went to the library to do alot of reading up. I feel that there are more collections in Pasir Ris Community Library than SengKang. And the reading environment is much much better.. at least the seats in Pasir Ris are mostly 'cushioned' - feel more comfortable lor.
Hope everyone in this thread have a wonderful weekend. All the best for those TTCians and for pple like me - Don't give up. Tomorrow will be better!

millie · Jun 26, 2004

jujube, pageup, ariella and miao2, it saddens me to read new cases of m/c. rest well for now and do come often to 'talk' to us here. having this thread really helps me in recovering. i hope it does for u too.

like tiny mentioned, the length of days for bleeding dpds on indd. miao 2, brownish stains shld be ok. i hv brownish stains on and off after my d&c even though i stopped bleeding on the 2nd day. impt is to make sure u still not bleeding red stains and u don't feel any discomfort/pain.

ocean, i m resting at home.

sometimes, just feel like rotting at home over the wkend rt? dr kowa is very very nice and gentle. do consider him strongly!

tiny, don't worry. be positive be positive be positive!

u'll get to see ur little one again soon.

anyone watch soccer? i got influence by hubby. so greedy...even bet $50 on france yesterday. there goes my $$$ down the drain!

jujube · Jun 26, 2004

Hi oceans, tiny, and millie, thank you all for your encouraging words, I have felt a lot more positive after reading through this thread.

Tiny, yes, I saw the microwave that you gave to Curly for her boss! It's so cute and it reflects exactly what I feel too, keke! Had a good laugh at that -- my first good laugh in two days! Thanks!

Just wondering, what should I expect at the followup checup with my gynae in two weeks' time? And what should I ask? Also, mine happened in week 13. Is that considered 1st trimester or 2nd trimester?

Okay, all you wonderful ladies have a great Sunday and hey, don't spend too much on soccer yah?!

ariella · Jun 26, 2004

Hi Ocean,Tiny, Miao2 & Millie

Thanks for all the encouragement & info..at least i feel abit normal now

Miao2

I was about to go to Sengkang library just now to look for books, but i think they have limited books there so i drop the idea...Do u stay ard sengkang too?

Millie

My hubby& my dad just started bettin on soccer 2 days ago... its quite exciting to watch the match if u have betted on the team..my hubby very stingy when it comes to betting so he just lost $10..but i think my dad bet quite alot so not sure how much he lost...

I m thinkin of going for belly dancing..i heard that its a good exercise before and during pregnancy as its strengthen ur pelvic muscle and abdominal area..

joycesprit · Jun 26, 2004

Hi everyone,

Since the day I found out that I'm pregnant, I began to be more cautious with my movements/action. I'm afraid of hurting the foetus(although it's still tiny). Coz' I heard a lot of M/C cases here, I'm a bit worried.

Another reason is that my 19 mths old boy keep clinging on me, order me to carry him, if not he'll throw his temper at me. My mum told me, especially when I'm preggy now, my son will cling more on me coz' he worried that I might divert my attention to his younger bro/sis instead of him in future. (Very headache)

Sorry for my 'loh soh' msg.

Hi miao2, pageup, Ariella and jujube, welcome to the thread. This is a place where we will show concern to each other.

So gals, remember that ... Treasure it...

Once again, I'd like to spread baby dust, peace, love, health and luck to everyone here !!

pageup · Jun 27, 2004

Hi ladies,

Thanks for the welcome and encouragement.

Hi jujube,
i went for my follow up checkup one week after. My gynae did a scan to ensure there isn't sign of infection.

Hi Ariella,

Don't mind me if my question sound a bit insensitive. But I would like to know what is the diagnosis and treatment for PCOS and endometrosis?
I will go for a thorough checkup at my gynae after my 1st menses (which I should have gone even before conceiving, naughty me). My doctor said he is not ruling out the possibility of me having that either of that 2 conditions because I have really bad menses cramp since young. I'm rather worried that it affects the success rate of pregnancy.

Ladies, does anyone of you feel that you get tired more easily even after a couple of weeks from D/C?. I returned to work just last monday (i.e one week after d/c) and I felt difficulties concentrating on work by afternoon.
I wonder if this is normal? or it is just lack of exercise?
Speaking of which, my family and friends have been advising me not to go back to my gym workout routine that soon. I wonder when is the right time to start exercising again?

Thanks and sorry for so many questions

ariella · Jun 27, 2004

Hi Pageup,

I was diagnosed with PCOS late 2002 around the time of my wedding. I started gainin weight from 56kg to 65kg all of a sudden. Mense start to delayed. First gynae i went din detect the cyst so i changed another gynae. She is Dr Lisa Chin in Geneagles..

She said the reasons for all the sudden change was due to hormonal imbalance that was caused by the ovarian cyst..I got a couple on each side. For the first year, I was given high dosage of clomid. Its does help regulate my ovulation abit but din help much in conceiving. Early this year, she suggested i go do laparoscopic surgery for the ovaries as well as check my fallopian tubes. Everything went well after the surgery, tubes not blocked very impt. My mense still abit haywire after the surgery but second month, AF came on the dot 28days, then 3rd month, I was expectin.

I thought my PCOS was bad but after reading alot of other cases, mine considered mild.
Sorry cant provide info for endometrosis.

Dont jump to conclusion, that due to bad menses cramp, it will affect the success rate of pregnancy, wait till ur doc give u ur diagnosis. Ppl with the above conditions oso can get prgenancy without even treatment.

May i ask how long have u try?
Actually i dont think u have bad condition as u can get pregnant..

I m oso wonderin when is the right time to start my exercise routine..guess i will start after this week.

ariella · Jun 27, 2004

Hi Ladies,

I got a few questions for the graduates

1)After ur D&C, how long AF take to come?
2)Wat did u all eat during mini confinement?
3)Anyone drink noni juice before pregnant?
4)How long after D&C, u all tried BD?
5)How many cycles u all ttc before becoming graduates?

Sorry for all these questions, though i tried to note down after running thru all ur experiences, i still keep missing out info. I hope if its not too troublesome, u all can help me out.

Thanks

miao2 · Jun 27, 2004

Hi Ariella,
Yes. I'm also staying in Seng Kang - four mins walk from Compass Point. You too?
Hi Joyce,
Thanks for the welcome. So happy for you. Must be extra cautious huh! Don't ponder too much on it lor..too much worries also no good. Think can get your hubby to carry your boy 'cos you cannot carry him leh.. rather strenuous for you now lor.
Hi Pageup,
Well, me too. Tho' I was given 2wks MC, I went back to work 1wk later but felt so tired and also diff to concentrate much on work.So my boss told me to go home rest for another wk. So I'm still on MC (lazing at home) gg back to work on 29/6/04.
Hi ladies,
Just to check w you. On the day tt I was waiting for my D&C, my hubby paid for the admin and op charges. After tt, I was looking at the bills and realised that there is a lab test charge on my D&C bill. So I called the clinic and realised that my gynae will send the "product" of the op for lab test. Do you have that in your bill too? I'll be seeing the gynae tomorrow but rather curious about it lor. Have been thinking what sort of test result will it show. Hope nothing very disturbing lor.

miao2 · Jun 27, 2004

Hi Ariella,
1)I read from books and also various postings that AF will come about 3-5 weeks after D&C bleeding stops.
2)I took lots of essence of chicken, drink DOM everynite. Red dates with ginger and dried longan drink. My mum made me dang gui with chicken soup-all taken for about two weeks after D&C. Most imp make sure not cold drinks and no 'liang' stuffs.
3) No. I don't take this juice before pregnant.
4) Ha! cannot ans you this yet 'cos still waiting patiently for my AF to come.
5) Well, we ttc for two cycles after 2yrs marriage.
Regards, Miao2

jujube · Jun 27, 2004

Hi Joyce,
Thanks for the welcome too. I've read that you can explain to your firstborn that he is still going to be just as important to you after the baby is born. Also, that you can involve him in helping out with the new baby, like in making a birthbook, talking to the baby in your stomach, so that he feels that he is a part of it... do try! A friend's 2-yr-old daughter is so upset with her newborn baby brother, she keeps telling her parents to throw him away into the dustbin! Funny and cute but horrifying too, I thought!

Hi Pageup and Ariella,
I was diagnosed with PCOS too, but my gynae said it wasn't serious as I could still ovulate and conceive on my own. Although a v-scan did show the 'string of pearls' in my ovary, I do not have the typical PCOS symptoms (obese, hirsute, etc). But I am wondering if PCOS might have something to do with the mc. Maybe the hormone levels? What do you think?

Ariella,
I am doing mini-confinement now. I catered confinement food from Natal Essentials. It's really tasty! And the portions are large enough for my husband and me to share!

I'm really curious to know the answers to your other questions too...

ariella · Jun 27, 2004

Hi Miao2,

I stayed in Anchorvale Road...aaaaa...about near 10 mins walk from compass point..coz i got short legs so take 10 mins or more..

As for the billing.. I m not sure coz my hubby handled, it shld include the lab test charge i guess.

ariella · Jun 27, 2004

Hi jujube,
I also have the same worried abt PCOS causing the mc but dont think too much until u consult ur gynae, wat he/she have to say abt ur lab test etc.

Actually i was half doubtin my gynae after readin about someone in the post who have PCOS and was given progestrone jab weekly to support the pregnancy..I wasnt given any then and also do not have hormone test taken..Mayb when i visit her i will consult her about it...
To be safe, I m considering a pre pregnancy test to be taken before i ttc again..I also wan my hubby to check. But he is not very keen

teletubby · Jun 27, 2004

dear Ocean,

I am rather calm today... but on thurs, fri & sat, i was rather teary cos i kept on recalling all the events dat took plc jus a week ago.. had my D&C done last Sat... aii.. i'm the sort of person dat tends to recall things over & over again... bad habit.. but guess it's in me.. can't help it...

since u hv a few options in mind.. u can slowly consider them & make up ur mind in abt 4 weeks' time... at first i tot u r sticking wif KK, dat's why suggest u choose a permanent gynae...

enjoy ur time wif ur lil' one in the meantime...

dear miao,
guess for ur spottings, if u feel uncomfy abt it, why not give ur gynae a call... i read from the veri first few postings in dis thread dat a lady spotted/bled for 22 days after D&C... so i guess it's veri individual... for my case, i had veri bad contractions on thurs nite (5 days after D&C) & my flow became heavier... guess my uterus is contracting & squeezing out the remaining old blood.. i am now spotting... hopefully, everything will end soon...

curly · Jun 27, 2004

Hi jujube, miao2, pageup and ariella! It's sad to read abt your m/cs..... It's not an easy period for you and your hubbies.... take time to grieve and learn to live again..... Do take care of yourselves and don't forget to eat and rest well.

ariella, regard your questions -

1)After ur D&C, how long AF take to come?
5 weeks
2)Wat did u all eat during mini confinement?
As I have been cooking myself, I do chicken with ginger and DOM, pork with ginger, DOM and egg. A bit sian after 2 weeks....
3)Anyone drink noni juice before pregnant?
no
4)How long after D&C, u all tried BD?
2 mths and got pregnant but unfortunately another m/c......
5)How many cycles u all ttc before becoming graduates?
1st pregnancy 2 cycles and 2nd 1 cycle.

miao2, my gynae did a lab test too. Can't find the lab report... It said something abt "molar pregnancy not found" meaning no abnormality found (I think).

java, I intend to quit first.... Financially I am ok, so there's no hurry to get another job.

Ocean, I wrote to MOM and this is what I got from them (which I already know!) "Under the Employment Act, either the employee or the employer can terminate the contract of service by giving notice in writing or by paying salary in-lieu of notice to the other party. The notice period shall be in
accordance with what is stated in the contract of service. If an employer wishes to terminate the employee's contract of service without giving any notice, he may do so by paying the employee a sum equal to the amount of
salary which would have been earned by him during the required notice period. If the termination is initiated by the employer, the employee should not be asked to tender his resignation."

ariella · Jun 27, 2004

Hi Curly,

Thanks for ur encouragement..u too dun be discourage ok

I just wan to ask u for DOM & egg? how to make and how much DOM u put in?

Thanks for answerin my question!! Have a good day!

jujube · Jun 27, 2004

Hi Ariella,

Yah, I read about the progestrone jabs and hormone tests too, but my gynae never mentioned them or advised me to take them either. I do wonder if they could have helped, but it's too late to do anything now, sob!

What is a pre pregnancy test? Where can we do this?

Hi Curly,
Thanks for the comfort and advise. Just being on this thread is helping a lot!

Ladies, I went to see my priest after mass this morning and he said that mc is very common nowadays. He said that out of 10 pregnancies he sees, almost 9 end up in mc, but usually the future pregnancies are fine. So I guess we should just be optimistic. That's what I am trying to do anyway!

miao2 · Jun 27, 2004

Hi ariella,
Ah. I'm staying at Anchorvale Drive. The Seng Kang neighbourhood is getting more and more busy huh! You can see the crowd at Compass Point everyday..

Hi tubby,
Nice to see your post today. Good to know you are feeling better today too and slowly pulling yourself together. I have the same character like yours but I keep reminding myself everyday to look forward for a better tomorrow. Err.. it's also good to have supportive hubby and family lor.
As for my spotting, I'll be seeing my gynae tomorrow for my follow-up visit after the D&C. Guess will have lots of questions for her lor.
Think like what jujube said, we have to be optimistic lor..
Have a nice day everybody..

curly · Jun 27, 2004

ariella, I'm not discouraged! Will be trying again once my body is back in shape, probably in 6 mths time but hopefully earlier.... Can't really rush into it since I had already suffered 2 m/cs in 3 mths!

Regarding the dish, first I fried an egg (he bao dan) and put aside. Then fried ginger until fragant, add pork and cook, add water and DOM and finally put the egg and let it simmer for 1 or 2 min. The amount of water and DOM I use is to suit my taste. Maybe you can start with half bowl of water with 2 or 3 tbsp of DOM and adjust to your taste after that. Same for the chicken.

I have learnt a soup which apparently is very "bu". You need dried longan, ginger, brown sugar and egg. Boil dried longan and ginger for abt 20 min, then add brown sugar to taste and crack egg into soup and cover for abt 3 min. Eat before bedtime, 2 or 3 times a week.

jujube, glad that you find comfort in this thread. It really helps a lot....

ariella · Jun 27, 2004

Hi jujube,

Regardin the pre pregnancy test. I think have to see the lab test result first..coz dependin on the result oso..testin of genes etc... not too sure too... PAI SEI

Hi Miao,
We seem to live quite near..yup, compass point getting really crowded esp weekend & weekday evening..mayb coz of the interchange bah!

Hi Curly,
Very inspired by u

Thanks for the detail on the cookin..
I want to try DOM but still no courage to drink it from its original form. I think thru ur receipe i will be able to enjoy the goodness of DOM liao without puking it out.

Ur longan soup with eggs, "bu" soup reminds me of another quick method, my SIL taught me...its mixing milo with raw egg.

millie · Jun 27, 2004

hi everyone, i didn't learn fr my mistake. lost $$ again for sweden-holland match.

but i bet a little lah...$10 only.

ariella, to ans ur questions:
1. AF came abt 4 wk plus later for me
2. my mum cooked for me. mainly food with either ginger or wine (i am hakka, so i ate a lot of chicken and eggs cooked in wine). i didn't drink red date water though. have been drinking warm plain water.
3. never tried noni juice.
4. my gynae advice for me is if m/c without d&c, can BD after 1st AF. if m/c with d&c, better BD after 3 cycles. i follow accordingly. if just making love

, we started abt 2 wks after d&c....with protection.
5. i graduate btw 1-2 mths when i ttc but as u know....sadly, got to re-test everytime.

no harm going for tests if u feel more comfortable. think if u explain to ur hubby ur concerns, he will be willing to go. usually, gynae don't advice for tests unless m/c 3 times or more.

jujube, tests include blood and urine tests for ladies and sperm test for man. and for checkup with gynae after d&c, my gynae did a scan for me to ensure tt all is well in our interior. (u know what i mean lar hor). 13 wks is btw 1st to 2nd trimester? think ur gynae can give u better advice on it. cos they say sometimes our own calculation not so accurate.

miao2, my gynae also sent for lab test without my knowledge. we just paid lor. he didn't tell me details. just let me know tt it was confirmed a blighted ovum for me. think most or all gynae will include the lab test just in case there is any abnormality they can detect in the foetus.

pageup, even though we had gone through m/c, it is considered as we hv given birth (to chinese). so physically, we are very weak. i also feel tired easily. even till now. i am seeing chinese sinseh and his advice is to avoid exercising (and even having sex) at least for 1 mth or more. i choose to heel his advice and rest as much as i can. and of course, avoid all cold food and 'liang' stuff.

joyce, thks so much for ur baby dust! i am sprinkling myself with it as much as i can.

folic, read in the bali forum tt u r planning for bali trip! hubby and me also thought of going bali for the national day long wkend!

but haven't start planning yet.

millie · Jun 27, 2004

ariella, can't imaging the taste of milo with raw egg! but if it's 'bu' i'm game to try it.

i can't stand DOM too. burnt my throat everytime i drink. forget to include tt i still drink DOM cos of the 'bu'. my concern now is to 'bu' and 'bu' and be in top condition when i can ttc again

ariella · Jun 27, 2004

Hi Millie,

Betting can be addictive but well due to the Euro Cup Heat..its ok just dun throw in too much $$..

Hope u have better luck in the later games.

Thanks for helpin me with the questionaire. I need those info to see if i m on track and ttc with maximum care.

For the milo & egg, I haven try yet. I will try tomolo. According to my SIL, u mixed well , u shld not feel a thing.

Sometime i wonder if we "bu" & "bu", will we get overheated? and instead of good it become bad !! I tryin to see how to balance out with some coolin element like drinkin warm chrysantheum tea? Dunno it helps or not??

I oso wan to ask about the chinese sinseh u went to...Is it at balestier? I heard accupunture helps oso in "tiao yang" ur body..

jujube · Jun 27, 2004

Okay, this is regarding "bu" and overheating and is a bit TMI, apologise in advance hor! *blush* (erm, how do you put those icons in?)

I don't think we can overheat lor. Because we are supposed to have a lot of "wind" in us right? I was a bit skeptical of all this, thought it was just old wives' tales. Then...

My hubby and I are both eating the confinement food that I catered since the portions are so big... well, I get loose stools, he gets hard ones! I think it's because my body is so full of "wind" that even the heatiness of the food is not enough to constipate me, whereas my hubby, whose body is normal, i.e. no "wind", gets easily constipated by the same heaty food.

So we don't have to take anything cooling yet, as our bodies have to balance the yin and yang first. Does this make sense? Am just guessing...

tiny · Jun 27, 2004

Hi Ariella,
To answer your questions..
1)After ur D&C, how long AF take to come?
- Mine took 7 weeks to come from day of AF. 2 weeks of bleeding/spotting, followed by 5 weeks of waiting till first sign of AF.

2)Wat did u all eat during mini confinement?
- didn't have much of a mini confinement. i had my d&c on a Thur and that evening had normal food (met my cousins for dinner at a restaurant) Just rested the weekend. back to work on Monday. But I remember my mum-in-law just included more liver in her soup for me.

3)Anyone drink noni juice before pregnant?
- nope...what's that?

4)How long after D&C, u all tried BD?
- My gynae advised us to only start making love after the bleeding (after D&C) stopped to minimise risk of infection. He also said to have protected sex until 1st AF comes along.

5)How many cycles u all ttc before becoming graduates?
- For the 1st time, it was our 1st try. but after m/c, it was during the 6th cycle that i finally made it. But I don't think I'm the norm here...seems like most of the others graduate soon after m/c, they've said that you're more fertile after a m/c. I think for me, my cycles were changing after the m/c and prob took a while to 'settle down' and regulate itself.

Actually after reading this thread, it seems like many of us have different experiences. So sometimes it's hard to tell what the norm is. But rest assured, everything will come naturally in its own time.

Continue to rest well and concentrate on healing emotionally and physically first. Take care girls!

millie · Jun 27, 2004

ariella, i sort of agree with u. it's really hard to balance btw 'bu' and too much 'bu'. i do wonder if i hv been 'bu-ing' too much (got constipation problem now) but yet, at the same time, i worried tt i am not taking care of myself if i dun eat 'bu' stuff. guess it's the balancing? actually, in my case, my mum only cooks all the confinment food for me for a wk. after tt, she try to put sesame oil in the food she cooks. i try to take more fruits (not cold ones fr the fridge) and vegs lor. and i still drink DOM every nite.

better not drink cooling stuff. my sinseh is weird - he is against us 'bu-ing' too much. didn't give reason...just said tt we may overdo it. huh? but his advice is definitely no no for cold and 'liang' stuff. so i avoid lor. just eat normally now(but healthy stuff - no junk food for me so far) except tt i still drink DOM. let me know the taste of milo and milk.

the sinseh at balestier is ngee ann chinese medical clinic i think. some of us (sorry forget who) did go for consultation. think they r quite well-known. the one i go to is at serangoon north area. i feel very at ease with him and he is quite comforting.

heard abt acupunture also. do u now of anyone? my sinseh doesn't do acupunture. hv u heard of using qigong? my mum's fren has been persuading me to try go her master's place for qigong therapy but i quite skeptical abt it.

jujube, wat u say makes sense too! now tt i recall, i hv been having loose stools for abt the 1st few days after my m/c. but now, i am hving constipation problem.

maybe my body recovering back to normal liao???

folic · Jun 28, 2004

Hi gals!

wow, so many postings over the weekend.

jujube, pageup, ariella and miao2, welcome to the thread. I hope you will each find strength and recover both physically and emotionally soon!

miao2, I smiled when I read that you read all the books on miscarriage at Pasir Ris library. You must have been like me..

I just want to let you know that although it is good to read the books, you must also take care not toe read too much into it. I think there is one stage I go through where I try to be 'doctor' and try to diagnose if whatever that was being described on the book could be the cause of my loss. I think I nearly went crazy then!

Millie, yes, going to Bali. I have many free mileage points which are expiring and so thought of using it for Bali lor. If you want to go during the National Day weekend, you might not be able to get the air tickets though. That's what I heard from one of my frens. But no harm trying.

OK, I will go back to read the postings again later in the afternoon. Now, I gotta go work. Talk again soon!

cheers!

folic

odie · Jun 28, 2004

Hi Jujube, Miao, Pageup and Ariella... welcome to the thread and hopefully you ladies will find some comfort here.

Jujube... having kids is a very personal choice. Don't be affected by what you hear. Everyone lives for different reason.

Miao... like you I had a missed miscarriage. No tell-tale signs. What did your gynae advised you about the bleeding? In my case, I only bleed for a day. No spottings thereafter. But everyone here seems to have different experience... so maybe your gynae will be in a better position to advise you.

Pageup... yes I felt lethargic after the MC. Not physically... but just not in the mood to do anything especially the first 1 week and over the weekends. Have you gone for a follow up with your gynae? If your gynae clears your health status you should be able to go back to your regular routine. But the elders will probably tell you to rest for at least 1 month.

Ariella... with regards to your questions. My first AF came 6 weeks after the D&C. By the 3rd week after the D&C.... gynae said that sex can resume. As for conceiving... initially he advised to wait for 3 months but on the 3rd week... he said that physically I am ok and even if I conceive before the 3 months is up he feels that it is not a problem. The 3 months is only in theory. But I think most people will wait for the first AF before trying again... this is to at least ensure that the hormones are back to normal. I would say that it is also important that you have recovered emotionally as well... not just physically. In my case... hubby and I agreed to wait out the 3 months. Kiasee mah... so playing on the safe side

And yes... I agree that reading up helps. It may bring tears to the eyes but at least after that you will have a better understanding.

Ocean... my cycle has always been anything between 32 to 36 days. Initially I thought that my cycle will be shorten to 28 days after the MC but doesn't look like it. Guess that it will be sometime end of this week or early next week. So I can only wait now. Life is indeed a waiting game.

tiantian · Jun 28, 2004

Good morning gals.

Jujube, Miao2, Pageup and ariella, welcome to this thread.

Ocean,

Thanks for much for your encouragement. Indeed, I really think it is a miracle to be able to conceive given only less than 1% chance. If you hv not make up your mind on which gynae to choose, I would like to recommend my gynae, Dr T C Chang from TMC. He is very gentle and patience.

Pageup,

I had endometroic cysts and still able to conceive.(see my story above) I do not have obvious symptoms other than menses cramp during 1st 2 days. My menses is oso not very heavy. Wat I want to say is , pls do not give up. You will succeed again someday. And, yes, I do feel tired after D&C.

I resume going back to the gym one month after D&C but I only do very light exercise.

Dear Ladies,

I have a question here. Are your A/F cycles more regular or delayed after d&C. I had my 1st AF 3 weeks after D&C on 25th May and this month, 35 days liao but still no signs of A/F and I am quite sure that I am not........ unless I ovaluted late.

ariella · Jun 28, 2004

Hi Tiny & Odie,

Thanks for helpin with my questionaire.

Hi Tiantian & Folic

Thanks for ur welcome !

Hi jujube & Millie,

Regarding the "bu" stuffs.. I think i got "overheated" yesterday.. Ok wat happened is that i went to drink black chicken herbal soup with my hubby, then i came home drank chicken herbal soup that my hubby prepared earlier on with Gordon Blue...then before i sleep i drank the longan with red dates & dang sheng. I develope a bad headache and din get to sleep till early this morning..so mayb I shldnt "bu" so much.

Dear all ,

I have some other questions,
1)My breasts keep feelin really heavy and occasionally have sharp pain around it..is it normal after D&C? or is it a sympton that my AF coming soon?

Thank you
Have a great day!

pageup · Jun 28, 2004

hi ariella, jujube and tiantian,

thanks for the information.
actually, i wasn't so worry about conceiving. I got married in Feb this year, and it doesn't take a long time for me to get pregnant. I'm more concern about carrying the baby to full term. I guess that is the biggest wish for all you ladies in this thread.
I was sent to another gynae for 2nd opinion scan before the D/C and the scan show some uneven texture near my ovary. My gynae wouldn't want to comment much until my next visit. Rather worried now but I guess I can only keep my finger crossed until my next appointment.

Hi Odie, I have already gone for follow up check after d/c. But my gynae didn't give me much info with regards if I can get back to normal life. He only said I can eat whatever I want to

Hi Millie,
think I will follow what most ladies here do, i.e to start exercising after one month

I also visit alternative therapy which is a tcm clinic at bukit batok. Was introduced to this sinseh by a neighbour who got recurrent miscarriage, she has a baby girl, who is 5 now after visited him. Anyway, this sinseh prescribe one month supply of herb to me to strengthen spleen and womb.

I guess the best we can do is to improve chances of successful pregnancy the next time is to improve on our health. The only thing left which is out of our control is genetics, hopefully the genetic engineer up there will be kind to us the next time.

Ladies, can you enlighten me on all the abbreviation? What is AF?
thanks.

oceans · Jun 28, 2004

Good Afternoon Everybody!

Feeling sleepy today..

Ariella, to answer your qns:-
1) My 1st AF came after 3wks on the 21/04/04.
You know, this qn was directed at Linda(she was the one who created this thread) after she had conceived. I was quite motivated cos her AF came 3wks after D&C and she conceived after that too. It sorted of given me the confidence cos i was scared that my 1st AF came too early.

2) I had a 2 wks mini confinement which was recommended. So far, during that 2 wks, i only drank plain water on the 1st day and only while taking medicine. For the rest, my mum boiled logan red date with changsheng to replace my daily drinking. I din drink any cold water during this time too.
Morning, mum will cook ginger with slice fish and Bee Hoon/Mee Suan. I will also drink Ess of Chicken every morning.
Afternoon & Night, eat rice with veggie and chicken/pork cooked with seaseme oil.
Except for the 1st day, the rest of the 2 wks confinement time, i bath with those herb to get rid of body wind
By the way, i only started to drink DOM after i had finished my antibiotics cos scared "clash" in the Chinese and Western Medicine. As a general rule, give urself an hour to rest if u r takin western medicine.

3) Noni Juice - No, i din drink it. Quite expensive drink.
My mum last time got take, but now din drink liao. I also forgot the benefits of this drink.

4) After my D&C, i din BD

until my 1st AF came. Hubby was scared to injure my already weak womb. Moreover, i still got spotting on & off. So we thought it is better not to in fear of infection too.

5) As per how many cycle i start to ttc

...If u r talking abt my 1st pregnancy, i think it was hard as after my customary, soon after, i found myself pregnant liao! But as my previous cycle b4 AF was very very irregular, i cant tell too.
After my D&C, my hubby and i din really try to ttc

, but we BD without any safety precautions. Thus, i was considered only after 1 AF.

Most pple tell me that after D&C, we are considered very fertile. I guess this is true also, but we are also very fragile. So till now, i am also quite scared and maybe the constant tummy pain was also due to my womb being weak too..

Well, jujube, the above also for your information too.

But do note that as individuals react differently, so as least this is so call "one case" that you can read for info only lah!

jujube · Jun 28, 2004

Hi Folic, Odie, Tiantian,
thanks for your welcome and support!

Hi Ariella & Millie,
i guess "bu" or not is really something that only we ourselves will know, since our bodies will signal us when it is too much, as in your case, Ariella.

Hi Odie & Miao,
mine was a missed miscarriage too. Did your gynaes tell you why it happened?

Dear ladies who went to the sinseh at Ngee Ann Traditional Medicine Centre, could you please let me know:
what language does the sinseh speak? Can he or she speak English? I am useless with dialects and not great in Mandarin, so am a bit worried if I go, and then get the info all mixed up. If he/she does not speak English, do you know another sinseh who specialises in gynae problems and speaks English? Thank you!

Pageup,
AF is Aunt Flo ('flow') as in your menses. All the best for your ovary appt!

oceans · Jun 28, 2004

Pageup, isn't that sort of irony that we met here in this thread....

It sorted of make me feel sad that in the Feb'04 thread, there are u, me and Odie going thru the same painful experience.... Agreed with you that other than being able to conceive, the next wish we had to to carry the baby to full term and also health delivery too. By the way, when is your next appt?

Wow Curly, u now how to cook?

So nice, think ur hubby must be very lucky. But hor, u must not over-tired urself hor!

So u did write to MOM. That statement i also know. But didn't they talk abt ur company discrimmation and agst women getting preggie?

Tubby, dont worry

! I felt that way too. Suddenly getting very emotional and tery when remembering about the loss. You know, my hubby even asked if i need to see a psycotrist (spell

) He very bad hor! Sigh... But guys are like that...

odie · Jun 28, 2004

Hi Pageup... AF is aunty flo meaning menses. When is your next appointment with the gynae? Hopefully your gynae can shed some light. But probability that it happened due to chance is rather high. Alot of gynae will say that if it is a 1st time miscarriage.

Jujube... gynae only told me that it happened by chance and that most cases of 1st miscarriage is because the baby wasn't developing well. I had a pair of identical twins and they were sharing one amniotic sac... so the risk was much higher. The two babies might be sharing the same placenta and could suffer from twin to twin transfusion. Gynae told us that 1/3 of such cases will end up in miscarriage and even if they survive... they could be born abnormal. End of the day... it will never be conclusive. Gynaes will only recommend conducting tests if its a recurrent miscarriage.

teletubby · Jun 28, 2004

dear miao,
thks for ur advise.. think i shd be like u, must hv positive tots & tell myself everyday dat tomoro will be a better day... it's been a week plus now... i still find it hard to open up...
my frens hv asked me out for breather.. to hv coffee or lunch... but i jus feel like hiding away at dis moment...

dear Ocean,
wat did ur gynae say abt the 'pain'? remember, not to carry heavy objects & walk slowly... take care...

ladies,
i think i got the weirdest 'pattern' after my D&C... had D&C done on Sat morning... on sunday, bleeding stops.. then monday afternoon, slight bleeding.. continues until thurs nite... i got bad cramps.. (like those i felt on my first day of AF).. dat nite, bleeding becomes heavier wif blood clots til fri.. then Sat & sun... brown spotting... sun nite.. bad cramps again.. then heavier flow wif blood cots (small pieces).. then today, mild bleeding again...

aii... if another episode of cramps & heavier bleeding occurs, i will call gynae liao..

lindy · Jun 28, 2004

Hi Gals

My 1st AF in finally here....5 weeks after D&C. Was quite worried when it din come after 4 weeks.

Hi Ariella

Answering to few of your Qn :
My Gynae did ask me if I want to do a lab test. The test was to confirm that mine is really a pregnacy so I told him no need. Felt quite redundant...my bb was 12 weeks already can see hands n legs, how can that not be a pregnacy???

Not sure if your test is the same one.

As for food during that mini confinement, everyday eat sesame oil with ginger & chicken, egg w ginger and dried longan drink.

Drank DOM abt 3 weeks after D&C, the taste is terrible. I drink and eat with some food (ba gua or titbits can't drink it alone. If you gals has some tips on drinking DOM, pls let me know. Tks!

I think will TTC after 2nd AF, dunno if it is advisable.

teletubby · Jun 28, 2004

dear Ocean,
hahhaa... my hubby oso ask me whether i need to see psychiatrists or counsellors!!!! but then he cheekily reminded me dat we got no money liao.. he say he can double-up as my psychiatrist, will gimme his shoulders to cry on.. made me luff when i'm crying halfway... aii.. spent quite a bit on my gynae fees... i think i visited my gynae abt twice a week for dat 4weeks of pregnancy...

miao2 · Jun 28, 2004

Hi Folic, Odie, Tiantian,
Thank you for the welcome and all the supports.
Hi jujube,
No. The gynae was not able to give reasons as to why it happened. I believed all our gynae here are not able to give any reasons at all. Be it happening at which point of each trimester lor.
Anyway, I've just got back from my gynae's review visit. A check was done on the internals-discover some yeast infection..was given some medication inserted into the vaginal. Other than that, all was okay.
Oh yah. My spotting stopped just yesterday..exactly two wks after D&C. The gynae says normal menses for me will come about mid-July (a mth after D&C) I believe this again should be up to individual also lor.
I also ask my gynae for the need for a pre-pregnancy check (when we are ready for ttc) she says it is not necessary.
Have a nice week ahead everybody

tiantian · Jun 28, 2004

Hi Tubby,

Think your case is actually like mine. I had severe cramp 3 days after D&C. The next day, ok and then 2 days later sever cramp again. The cramp is worse than AF cramp. I also have blood clot and the bleeding last for 1 week follow by another week of brown stain.

I called my gynae and and he asked me to see him immediately. Did a scan and found that there are sttill some leftover blood clot inside my womb. Gave me some antibotic and some pain killers. A few days later, no pain liao. If the pain persist, then better check with your gynae.

Take care.

teletubby · Jun 28, 2004

dear miao,

glad to hear dat everything went well for ur review... & good to hear dat ur spotting finally ended... now jus hv to look forward to ur first AF...

my gynae oso took my fetal tissues for lab test.. before the D&C, i asked him whether there's a need to send the tissues for lab test, then he said no need... usually, it's bb abnormalities.. dun need to waste money.. then hor, after my D&C, while paying, the nurse told me got lab test... dun hv to chance to tok to gynae as he's attending to other patient..

now i'm worried dat mabbe he discovered something unusual during the D&C & decided to send it for lab test... hv to wait for 2 more weeks before seeing him again...

teletubby · Jun 28, 2004

dear tiantian,

thks for sharing... indeed quite similar.. but my cramps r tolerable.. not veri severe.. i finished my 1 week's supply of antibiotic on fri nite...

after i woke up from my D&C, he scanned me from abdomen & saw some bits of tissues or blood clots.. which he say is common to hv some leftovers after D&C... so i guess i am just expelling out those leftover tissues now... will monitor closely.. thks... i am feeling ok now.. except for the mild bleeding again...

oceans · Jun 28, 2004

Lindy, that was strange of ur gynae to ask u to test to confirm that there was a pregnancy.

I meant doesn't ur gynae had a copy of ur ultrasound scan?

As for DOM, agreed the taste was... urghhh... But after i drank it, i can feel my tummy feeling warm. That was a nice feeling u noe!

Tubby, there was once when i started to long for a twin few wks after D&C...I ever told the gals here before.

Then i told my hubby abt it that how nice if i will to hv one monkey bb and one roster bb.

You know, another of my sweet little dream.

Then, this hubby of mine, put one hand on my forehead, and another on his. Told me "Strange, got no fever leh." Goosh, i felt so stupid after that!!

tiantian · Jun 28, 2004

Hi Pageup,

According to my gynae, there are many factors leading to baby not being able to carry to full term but endometrios is not one of them. I am equally concern as you as I have 2 endometroic cysts now.

Regarding the sinseh in Bukit Batok, can I have the address, tel and their operating hours. If I remember correctly, some ladies from another tread mention that this sinseh is related to the famous sinseh in Jurong East. Can someone confirm?? Thanks.

teletubby · Jun 28, 2004

Ocean,

i luff quite loudly while reading ur last post.. guys will always be guys... they will neber communicate to us on an emotional level... instead, they always tok or do silly/stupid things dat make us feel abit angry or make us luff out loud... then after dat, we will not be feeling so sad liao... guess dis tactic really works!!!

curly · Jun 28, 2004

Wow, so many postings!! No time to read all ..... Now back in office and a lot to catch up with...

ariella, forgot to tell you that I also add sesame oil to the dishes. I dare not drink DOM in its original form so I mix with luke warm water.

Yes Ocean, I do know how to cook! I cook every Sunday, always trying out new recipes. My hubby is missing my cooking already bec I have not been cooking for him since he's not interested in the ginger and DOM. Yah, wrote to MOM and the reply they gave is what we already know...... stupid right?

Oh and regarding TCM, my gynae only recommend authentic ones such as Thong Chai Medical and Chung Hwa Medical.

Ok, me gotta go..... Hope the rest of you are ok...

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