Support group - Miscarriages

hi ladies,

"sob..sob" i think i didn't strike again this mth, my mense shld come around 20th Mar but still now i've no feelings of being 'pregnant' like my first time..feeling so down and frustrated..i sometimes ask myself will i ever be successful in getting pregnant and giving birth to a healthy bb..hmmm..
 


Take heart, Chrysanne12, each pregnancy is different, who knows, you might just hit the bull eye this month:) Your AF is not due yet so it is not all hopeless :) The best things in life sometimes happen when you least expect it.
 
Hi Chrysanne - me feeling exactly what u feeling now...supposed to O on Mar 9 and now have to wait to see if menses will come 2 weeks later..however, have no feeling at all that I am pregnant like the last time...on one hand hope that mircale can happen, on the other hand, dont tink will be so heng...

Whats more - today heard that someone I cant stand in the company is pregnant and she is super FAT and a heavy smoker too...wonder how come??!! Sorry ladies - just throwing some frustration here!
 
ah kat, is like that one.. fate plays on us.. those who really want don't get it. Seriously, her bb is at high risk of a number of health problems.. same for her pregnancy cos of her weight.

Today is my O day.. half hearted about trying cos i dun like year end babies... sheessshh. heheh. those born yr end dun scold me hor!

piggy mummy, this is your second mc? first mc never dnc? for me, i had heavy to normal flow for nearly week and continued spotting for 2 weeks plus. dun think we can compare ours cos i mc-ed mid pregnancy.
 
xbliss,

ya,first mc actually only i late menses for 5 days, i checked by using pregnancy kits is faint +ve, but afterthat i did bldtest,the hcg olready drop to 5, and my menses came. so i went back to chk up after a week, doc put some med into vaginal to prevent infection, n did a bld test to make sure hcg level is low.So doc said very early stage..

My first two day after dnc got heavy flow, then turn to spotting at day 4(yesterday). Now i only wearing panty liner..

i already make up my mind, most important is to build up my health. After i have done all the chk up, i wana go to holiday, and do more exercise and enjoy myself..
 
joline,

ya, i think so. coz my first gynae only told me miscarriage, but after that i consult 2nd gynae, he said that din call miscarriage, is called chemical pregnancy.

so ur gynae give u any antibiotics to eat?

rest_relax_forever,
i think u need to clink on the person user name u wana to pm, then a pop-up messsage will pop-up, and i think u can pm tru that message.
 
piggy mummy, i see. chemical pregnancy is very common. my colleague also had it. at least you din have to go through more trauma than some of us here who have to birth the bb, only to see it's life go away in a few seconds. sigh.

do take good care of yourself. Still young can always try again.
 
xbliss,

nt young liao, already 28-29, my husband 32 liao..

few days ago (after dnc), my discharge is brown color, but 2day turn to waterly red, but nt much,on n off. izzit normal?
 
hi piggy_mummy, i have chemical pregnancy last cycle
sad.gif
everything come too fast... yah, its quite common.. but duno why, i miss that baby alot
 
piggy mummy. you 2 are of same age as my hubby and i! i still consider it young lah. as long below 30.. that's why we trying asap.

the discharge is normal. i experienced about the same.
 
Hey , mine was also a chemical pregnancy...actually sometimes was thinking that if only I neber find out that I was pregnant the last time and then maybe I wont need to be so stressed and gan jiong now n eat so many diff medicine...
 
hi. i hv a natural spontaneous abortion in my 8 wks of pregancy on 1st lunar new yr(ie.d 16 Feb). i was hospitalised for 4 days in NUH. my gynae assure me that nd not to hv D&C as it has passed out on its own due to severe bleeding. now it is coming to a month, i still hv slight bleeding.wonder is it normal? i hv my HCG beta taken. it is now 70+, dropping from 500+, 300+.....
any advise....
 
Hi wendy,
I think you shd go back to yr doc or seek another gynea opinion. 1 month of waiting is too long. The infection might come to you instead. It is better to "clean" everything thru d&c as you may not know what could be left inside if wait for natural m/c. Some people still have to do thru d&c after natural m/c to clean up anyway.
 
wendy, i agree with rest_relax, u should see your gynae. usually the gynae would still do a scan for a natural miscarriage to ensure that all tissues are passed out so that there will not be any infection later. But i did read that it is perfectly ok not to have a d&c if your body managed to pass out all the tissues, just make sure that you go for the scan after that.

piggy_mum, i went for my d&c on tue and my bleeding stopped on the 2nd day. now i'm worried that my gynae might be overzealous in removing the tissues in my womb and scrapped it too thin..will check with him on my next visit..what about the rest of the ladies, did your bleeding stop on the 2nd day?

here's something i found:
What tests are done following a miscarriage?
Doctors usually do not perform any tests following a first miscarriage that occurs in the first trimester. The cause of these early losses is often unknown, though chromosomal abnormalities are usually suspected. If a woman has a miscarriage in the second trimester or has two or more miscarriages in the first trimester, tests usually are recommended to help determine the cause. These can include:

* Blood tests to check for chromosome abnormalities in both parents (called a karyotype), as well as certain hormonal problems and immune system disorders in the mother
* Testing for chromosomal abnormalities in tissue from the miscarriage (if tissue is available)
* Ultrasound examination of the uterus
* Hysteroscopy, viewing the uterus through a special scope inserted through the cervix
* Hysterosalpingography, an X-ray of the uterus
* Endometrial biopsy, suctioning a small piece of uterine lining to check hormone effects
 
divine,

i don know the chemical pregnancy that i had last time consider as miscarriage or not. this time is mc, so this is the 2nd time. May b this reason, my gynae asked me to do an X-ray of the uterus..But i read from website that the xray of the uterus may cause some tissue die..so i thk i will ask him tomorrow (first visit after dnc).

Is this ur first dnc?My bleeding on and off, so may b have to ask gynae tomorrow.

But my second gynae suggest me to do a bld test..Actually i more comfortable with bld test if compare with xray..

I read some website that the tissue from the miscarriage can be test for chromosomal abnormalities too. But gynae din mention abt it..

How are u now? doing confinment? How many days of MC?
 
hi divine and relaxforever, my gynae did a scan before i was discharge and everything was clear. i called my gynae yesterday to folow up my HCG beta test done on wed (during my f/u visit). she say it does not remain a main concern as it proven in HCG beta is dropping.

she also advises just to rest and not to overexert myself and also remain supplements such as evening primose oil.

now, i only taking yomeishu....

wendy
 
wendy, then u have to check with her why you are still bleeding..not quite sure if it is normal for u to be bleeding for a month...if not, can get a 2nd opinion

piggy_mummy, sigh...this is my 3rd d&c, i've no courage to wait for a natural miscarriage. i think my physical recovery is fast...its the emotional part that i'm struggling with..i have my ups and downs. I asked for 2 weeks mc and try to do as much as those confinement stuff as possible. if u are given only 1 wk mc, u can ask your gynae for 1 more week, let her know u need more rest.
 
divine,
doc gave me 1 week, bcoz i have use up all the mc during that pregnancy, so now apply 1 week leave..

i also doing confinement, and drinking those "mi jiu" at night. u drink D.O.M?
 
Hi Wendy,
Do avoid yomeishu.. my TCM told me to avoid alcohol as it would prevent the womb from going back to it's normal size.

I also second the notion to seek 2nd opinion. Bleeding for a month is not quite normal.

I had a natural m.c too. Doc scan me before i discharge. He felt that D&C is not needed then as it was a natural m/c. However he asked to see me in a 1 week time. A week later, he scanned me and said to go for D&C as he noticed that the endometrial lining was too thick. i.e. though natural m/c but not all are flushed out. Thus I went for D&C.
 
Piggymummy, you did not activate your PM? Previously, you ask me to PM you my gynea, you still want?

Divine,
Hug...Hugs...you must be strong and look on the bright side of things. You have all of us here for support. Did you go for throughout check up ? it can help to pinpoint reasons for m/c. I did a lap after m/c and was found to have endo.
 
Hi Joline,

I did a mini 2 weeks confinement - mainly avoiding "cold" stuff and drinks.

Chemical Pregnancy is definitely consider a mc..so, pls take care of yr body.

ah_kat
 
Hi Piggy mummy, actually you can ask to be given hospitalisation medical leave after D&C instead of the usual medical leave. That was what i did to do the 2 weeks mini confinement. Like you my normal MC would not see me thru this period.
 
rest relax forever,

hw to activate the pm? or can u email me?
[email protected]
Thanks ha..

Eunice72,
B4 dnc i have already told my gynae i used up my mc, and i req for hospitalisation leave, but he said cannot..today i went for chk up, he said no need mc, but i thk gynae always like tat, i ever asked him whether need to do any confinement, he said no need..then the nurse said better to have 2 weeks confinement..

actually my bleeding become more today after checked by gynae.doc scan my uterus, and do a vagina checking for me (like pap smear) he said everythings looks ok, and ovary also ok. But 2day i suffered more cramp n bleeding more than usual.today is red color bleeding after seeing doc..izzit because of the pap smer? i quite worried..

I asked him abt the womb xray, he said his personal opinion think that xray is better than bld test. so he suggest me to do xray, somemore he said chances for women to pregnant again after doing xray is higher, coz problem can be easily find put through xray..

findingmiki,

my MIL asked me to drink D.O.M everyday leh?how?i ever heard fr some forumer alcohol have to avoid during this period..
 
think diff gynae do things differently. but what i understand is any day surgery we are entitled to take hospitalisation mc. my gynae was the one who told me can give me 2 wks mc if i want to do confinement. but when i went for my follow up check, i did not do any scan or anything leh. just consult, no body check or anything at all.

actually after d&c, i do not have much bleeding even till today. just some but not as heavy as mens and very on off. 1-2 days then nothing then come back again. then spotting then again no more. so i also dunno normal or not though my gynae said not to worry too much.

as for alcohol, i also got drink yomeishu till i read abt it in the forum. and i do observe that on days that i drink, i got spotting/bleeding more. so now i stopped.
 
piggymummy,
I had hospitalisation leave for 3 weeks, but in the end i only took 2 weeks cos bored at home. The nurse also told me day surgery entitle to hosp leave.
I also had on/off spotting bleeding for 22 days after D&C. There were days i am alright but days where i have bad cramp and bleeding and then i pass out pcs of blood cloths (like liver) and after that recover very fast. My gynae say this is normal as the body get rid of excess clots.
You can read this website www.pregnancyloss.info which i find useful.
 
hi piggymummy,

is your doc from private or public section?

can PM me the doc's name and clinic..

i am planning for a D&C. hope i did not end up the same doc as you.. dont really want to go into "bargaining" mode at this depression point in time..

thanks rest_relax_forever. the url is useful.
 
dolphin,
pm u liao..

2day i feel better, and yest i stopped drinking dom..When can we start to drink alcohol?now i started to eat "dang gui" liao..
 
hi piggy mummy,

my TCM told me to avoid alcohol ..especially after D&C, m.c, and during ttc.

After D&C, my former western doc asked me not to take dang gui, red dates, korean ginseng for 2 weeks. These encourage bleeding according to him.

But there seems differing opinion about red dates..thus i am not too sure about red dates now..
 
Hi ladies,

I am feeling lousy today. Friday is my gynea appt and i have not decide if i shd go for the hormone jab to curb my endo.I thot of ttc for another 3 months and if cannot preggie then go back for hormone jab.
kao_scared.gif


I m/c in Feb so can start ttc in May, so try from May to Jul first. I stress up if gynea ask me cos he encourage me to curb the endo.

Piggymummy, i heard that dang gui is no good for people with fibroid and/or endo.
 
i think i spoke too soon when i said my bleeding stopped on the 2nd day. Was experiencing cramps and bleeding on sat & sun til i thought my menses was coming...but it shouldn't be so soon right?? I had nothing like this for my past 2 mc, usually only light spotting til 3rd 4th day...like my past mcs, i've also been drinking plenty of dom, as prescribed by my mum...should i stop?

rest_relax, i understand your dilemma...do u need to go for your jab often or it is just a one time thing...if there are no side effects,is it better to go for it? If u are really not keen, just tell your gynae that you are not trying for the time being and would like to take a break before going for your jab..dun go for it if u dun feel comfortable abt it
 
divine, i don't think that was menses. it shd not be so fast. usually you have to wait 4-7 weeks for the 1st cycle. i also on/off bleeding, spotting and cramps for 22 days after d&c. Then clear for 10 days then 1st cycle starts. Not sure about dom, i dare not drink dom,yomeishi, dang giu or bai fen wan cos my doc say cannot take if i got endo. You can call your gynea to check else lay off just in case.

My jab is once a month for 4 months, it will stop menses and thus cannot ttc. don't know about side effects, must check this friday with doc.
kao_confused.gif

Just going crazy thinking about this.
 
Hi all

I went for D&C last thurs and my bleeding only lasted 2days. I was given 2 weeks hospital medical leave, I was really upset when the gynae cldnt detect my baby's heartbeat by Week 7 and when she did a vagina scan for me, realised that the water sac is too small, looks more like Week 5 only, hence went for hcg bloodtest and my hcg level was dropping. Now at home recovering and eating 'yucky' confinement food...dying for a burger right now,haha!

Anyone can advise me whether it's ok to travel 2 weeks after D&C? Cos nxt week i'll be going to taiwan for vacation..abit sad though cos i dun think i'll be able to try all kinds of food there. And also, when can we start having intercourse?
 
sunrays,
my case same as yours,cant detect heartbeat at week 8,and foetus size like 6 weeks..i also did a vagina scan..
i think travel shd b ok, can relax, but only cant eat cold food,somemore u have to eat healty food at this period leh..

i plan to have a short vacation to australia on jun or july..really cant tahan the stress after mc.
 
hi sunrays,

same here. week 9, feotus like 6 weeks. we detected heartbeat then. it stopped..

seemed like no. of days of leave differs. some gives 2 days.. some gives 7 days.. some give 2 weeks..different standard.

i had my D&C. my heart accepted this fate as yesterday, i had bleeding after i stopped taking hormones pills.

when follow this "confinement", can one bath immediately? need to wait till how many days?
how about washing that down-under area? can i do it on day1 or wait..

first timer here... in the hope to recuperate my strength this period..

piggy_mummy,
me too, i am dying to go for holidays immediately.... but have to go back to reality.. go back to work..
 
i believe confinement is all up to you. If you subscribe to western theory, then nothing really matters.. if you subscribe to eastern, then you should avoid certain things. Perhaps it might be easier to listen to the older folks as they claim they have been there, done that. Yet, it's not easy when we follow cos there are so many restrictions. As a result, i decided to do whatever i could take and ended up drinking only red dates tea. The rest of the yucky stuff i really coudln't force myself to stuff it down. Like i mentioned earlier, i felt a better way to regain my health was to start my sports 1 month after D&C and to eat healthily. That worked for me.. the backache i developed after the D&C has improved so much too.
 
i try my best to take all those confinement food, but it's really quite 'sickening' cos most of it is cooked with lotsa ginger and sesame oil. Today i had a break and went out for my burger,haha!! I told my hubby i can't tahan liao, gimme a break... cos he's the one preparing my confinement food so he's kinda strict with wat i eat but i think he pity me at last, that's why i managed to have my MOS burger just now!

I didnt bathe the 1st day i came back frm D&C, only 2nd day i boiled the herbal sachet together with a pot of water then mixed with normal water then shower...but 3rd day i can't tahan liao and i washed my hair! I try to do as much as wat the old folks say but certain things i really can't do...stuff like not washing hair and sleep without fan i cannot!

This is the 1st time i have a miscarriage..when the doc first told me abt the bad news, i grieved for 2 days before accepting the fact. But my best friend had 2 miscarriages in one year so i learnt to be strong thru her. The ironic thing is when i was younger and unwed yet, i had several abortions(my husband do not know abt it), now that i'm married and want a baby, this kind of thing happens...makes me wonder if it's karma...

And frankly i have some kinda phobia now, wondering whether to try again or not cos seriously, i dun wanna go thru the same feeling again. This D&C experience wasn't pleasant at all, in fact by the time i was wheeled into the operation theatre, i was already crying.. i was wishing it was a nightmare and i'll wake up hearing my baby's heartbeat....
 
hi sunrays,

thanks for sharing.. yes indeed m/c or D&C is unpleasant. i agree.something that you love dearly dies in you and you have to take it out..my heart ache greatly when i walked out from the op seeing a baby at the first sight..

i try to think along the line that if my baby continues to grow with deformities, bringing to this world will be even worst nightmare to the baby..

heal your body and soul first before ttc.. dont force yourself.

what's yours meant to be yours..
 
thanks for your advice, ladies. Yup, it's not my menses, cos it came on and off. I stopped taking dom and all the ginger stuff yesterday night cos it was too heaty for me and I started having sore throat....

sunray,i think a holiday is a really good idea, just dun exert your too much, get clearance from your gynae too..i'm planning for a trip in June too...as for intercourse, it depends on when you are ready for it emotionally but physically, maybe after your first cycle. there are gynaes that advice ttc only after 3 cycles though mine says after 1 cycle, your body should be ready..
 
after 10 days of dnc,i still eating confinement food, lunch and dinner. Hear fr my MIL, cant eat vegetable and fruit at this moment.. so i just follow. I din bath on the day of dnc, second day i wipe my body with herbal water.My MIL said cant mix the herbal water with normal water, so i just wait the herbal water to cool then bath.wash my hair once a week..actually really cant tahan..but no choice..But at night, i spin the fan, if not, i cant sleep at all..

divide,
i drink dom in alternate date, i day only 1 tea spoon..

do u all experince bloated stomach after taking ur meal or drinking water?my stomach really BIG leh..bloated like small baloon..

my gynae told me to wait for 2 cycle then ttc, but i think i will wait more cycle to "bu" my body and at the same time will go to c tcm to "bu" my body..
u know when can i drink those black chicken with tonic soup?
 
hi piggy_mummy,

this is my 2nd day..cant tahan the itch in my hair.
how long did you follow this rountine?

i dont have bloatd stomach. in fact, i am letting out alot of gas. i suspect its because i take alot of ginger. i happen to like ginger. i drink dates water only.. which is not as much as plain water..

i also subscribed to "bu" body first.. i dont want to go through another nightmare (mc) if i can help it..

how about asking your tcm physcian when to take tonic soup since he knows your body consitution..
 
dolphin,
now already 10days after dnc..my hair din itchy, but smelly..
sad.gif

i will have 2 weeks confinement,afterthat have to start work liao.But will still bring redates and longan tea to work. I also drink more longan reddates tea than plain water..

may i know when u start to consult ur tcm? after AF come?im thinking to c her this weekend..
 
Piggy_mummy,
i also experience bloated stomache, i asked gyane to give me medicine and it works. you can starts taking tonic soup once your menses stop. I consult tmc a few days after dnc.
 
AngelBee,
the menses u mentioned is after AF come? or the bleeding after dnc? Now i still have brownish discharge, not totaly clear yet..

u consult ur tmc so fast?i called my tmc, she also said can c her now if i want..i told her this is my second mc, she said must take care and "bu" and "tiao" first..

Did ur gynae say y the stomach get bloated??
 
Piggy_mummy,
The bleeding i am referring to is bleeding after dnc. wait till all clear then take tonic soup.

I 'kiasu' mah. but also have to brew the herbs after bleeding stops. chinese sinseh ask me to try after 3 cycles.

Gyane did not explained why stomach get bloated, he just ask me when i get bloated stomach, is it after taking antibiotic or during taking antibiotic.
 


hi piggy mummy,

its my 2nd day only. I can only rest for 5 days.
i plan to call tomorrow to enquire when i can come and consult my tmc doc.. guess they are the best person to advise..

before mc(normal days),i know when i AF, i cant take chinese medicine..

maybe mc is special case..not too sure.

think its better that you call yours to enquire when is suitable to consult.. no point go down and you cant take the medicine. afterall different tcm doc might have different opinions.

after all this episode, i realize that even different western doc have different views points..*sigh*

hair itch all over.. do u allow fan to blow directly at you?
 
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