(2008/09) Sep 2008

Hi Wingkei,

Like what babyatom said, try to rest during your confinement and not do too much housework. For me, I delivered in the US and my FIL came over to help cook for me. He cooks really well, but besides that, I am on my own to wash, change, nurse and coaxed my son to sleep in the day and night. I had c-section too, but was on my feet the moment I got home. I only rest when my son slept, but he's a very wakeful baby even in the first month, so I did not rest much. feel my body is weaker now than before. Might be due to age, might be due to me not having a good confinement, but the thing is, if you can get help, get it.
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hi sasa de mouse, it's ok, i dun need the list liao. I juz called them to ask if my gynae is on the list but they say no. For pediatricians, they said they 've TMC & out of TMC ones..
 
Hi Jaline, the shop at AMK is at Blk 720 (where the toiletries shop- Red Tomato is)you just have to walk the stretch, should be able to find it...

Dmbb: I am also looking for the list..
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Wingkei, why not you tell your hubby that you already confirm with your mum & you will do it at your house so that it will not be so tiring for your MIL. And your DH will not need to wake up in the middle of the night cos he is at his own house?
 
Hello all,
Too many posts to read already. just back from my OSCAR scan yesterday. BB not cooperative and i have been doing scanning for almost 7times.Anyway, anybody having serious heartburns?
Well i m very bad. Need to drink Gaviscon everyday, but the taste is yucks for now...
 
Dmbb: oohh.... the list is at home leh... but when u call them, they will usually ask u who's ur gynae den off-hand they will tell u if him/her is in the programme...

yupz.. the list was given to me only after i signed up for the FBI...
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storeberry: oops... forgot to check if Dr Woody was in the panel. aiyah.. forgetful nowadays... :p u wanna call tmc to check directly?

ydnic: wah... scan 7 times ah.. hehe.. good in a way oso lah.. den can see bb longer mah.. hehe. mine wasnt cooperative oso... scanned and took a break, went for a walk, drank more water.. in the end took over an hr... haha... sonographer (who was my cousin) say bb very active.. keep swimming around.. haha
 
Jaline (jaline): the store name is Carrano, outlet at Toa Payoh is at Blk 185 #01-334. It's near where the Toa Payoh library is. It's very easy to find once you see the block number.

I used to have black out whenever I'm having my menses and my blood pressure is on the low side of 60/80. I was afraid of fainting spells when I'm pregnant initially as well. But so far, Thank God, my blood pressure is improving and I did not experience any fainting spells. I think this is largely due to my diet, been taking alot of beef and spinach, which "bu" my blood.

The only time I felt faint was yesterday, after my blood test. I felt weak by noon, so took the day off to rest. On my way home, I was breathless and felt faint, and had to sit down and rest for a few minutes before I reached home. Walk from MRT to my home is 8 mins but I had to stop and rest twice!

My mum is going to double boil black chicken soup with dang gui for me today to "bu" as I've officially completed my first trimester.
 
wingkei,
now it's still early to decide who to do your confinement, so pls dun let this affect your mood and get upset, ok.

think your hubby seems to hv the last say in everything, but u gotta let him know tat you are the one who is doing the confinement, n u shld know how u wanna do it. and if he likes to think he doesnt hv to play his part in taking care of HIS baby, then you wanna consider putting your surname in baby's birth cert also! let your baby hv 2 surnames!

i dunno abt u la, but i'm a BIG woman! haha!! i dun believe in watever shit a man must blah blah blah...his woman must blah blah blah...etc. if your hubby saw this post, think he will ban u from reading liao! =P

i believe in both husband n wife work together in a family, just bcoz he is breadwinner now, doesnt mean tat he is the boss! u go and tell him, tat is not MAN enuff! if he is MAN, then he beta provide GOOD life, not getting wat recycled milk bottles for your newborn, n not wanting the best for his wife n children!

i know money is a constraint, but he doesnt hv to put u down all the time and be so selfish mah.. always out to hurt n put u down!

u go and tell him tat it's too early to decide abt confinement now, when the time comes, then u will decide wat u want since u r the one giving birth, not him!

u cant be too soft to him now, ok! if not, after bb arrives, u will be even softer to him for the bb's sake! at tat time, think u will only get urself into post-natal blues n cry all day long!

now, dun think so far ahead and worry for nothing since confinement is not going to happen until 7mths later lah! chin up, smile n tell urself tat u dowan to bear the burden of tomorrow today!

take good care of urself ok! hughugzzz...
 
Chk wif u ladies,must go wif full bladder for OSCAR test? Cos my clinic's nurse told me to eat breakfast only cos they gonna take 3 vials of blood frm me.. Going to do mine early tmr morning..
 
sasa
where to buy the instant ginger tea? What brand huh? Thx.

Wingkei
I hope I dun make u feel worse, but I feel very irritated reading abt ur hubby.
How come he must chap guan everything??? U r the one having confinement, being inconvenienced and it's YOUR BODY! Pls bu properly and have lots of rest. Minimal hsework.

If u r not comfortable with MIL then u better insist with all ur life on ur mum, cos from the looks of it, it seems that ur hubby gonna side with his mum all the time during confinemnent if u're not happy with anything. U certainly dun wanna be depressed after baby's birth!
Better still, stay at ur mum's place so that his mum got less chance to go over and interfere and give comments.

And from my expereince, no matter how well I got on with my MIL before confinement, facing her so many hrs a day, listen to her this and that, conflicts will surely arise. So if u want family harmony in the long run, I feel it's better to do with ur mum and minimise conflict with MIL. Otherwise wait u not happy u tell hubby then he turn tables on u, say why u so fussy. End up u r the unhappiest.

But of course u must tell him nicely that ur mum really wants to do for you blah blah blah. From the looks of it ur hubby is the 'chi ruan bu chi ying' type rite? If u 'fight' too hard, wait kena backfire...
 
Jasmine,

I think it shouldn't be a problem but don't eat too much. Recently i also feel like eat KATONG LAKSA. Emmm...Yummy Yummy!
 
wingkei,
after reading aloevera's post,
must clarify what i meant. Me agrees with her u can't be too soft with now otherwise next time worse.
What i meant was that you talk nicely to him but be firm in your stand. Dun scream or shout at him, otherwise u lose the battle already.

Since he doesn't seem interested in looking after baby, then you shld have greatest say in who you want to help YOU look after YOURSELF and baby rite?
 
jasmine
I will still eat but mebbe go easy on the cockles. Or better still dun eat the cockles.

xuanting
oops, i din read abt the cons at all when i decided. hee... I suppose it must be the cons that the hospitals do immediate cord clamping. I did see the link with reduced jaundice somewhere yesterday on immediate clamping though I din read properly.

But I guess I'm still more inclined to believe that there must be a valid biological reason for the cord to pulsate and deliver blood to the bb after it's born. Anyway, if i choose not to store cord blood this time, will still do delayed clamping since I did that for my first baby!
 
sunrays (sunrays): good to have breakfast if not may feel faint after they withdraw the blood. I was asked for urine sample too, but I think that's not a problem for us now, I can pee anytime haha!
 
sunrays,
doesn;t matter. Full bladder is only for later on some other scan later on in preg. But for us, still too early for that scan which i forgot exactly when it is.
 
wingkei
poor thing. maybe you should really make it clear to your hb.i think the earlier the better, coz if he goes on to 'confirm' it with his mom, then might have difficulty saying no later, and the situation might be even more awkward.

1. the child is his too right? duh, if that is so and he doesnt want to take care he should allow you to have full say on who to take care at night.

ok technically...
child=yours +hb
if hb=0, then child=yours to take care loh...

it's all mathematical. guys are more analystical...maybe this argument will work.

2. really, tell him your family has history of post natal depression, tell him stories of people with post natal blues now...slowly psycho him about the consequences of it...

3. tell him traditionally, MILs are NOT SUPPOSED to do confinement for DILs. Mothers do confinement for own daughters only. It is unlucky for MILs to do it and will spoil whatever harmony there is and the qi of the household.

Hope this helps!!!
 
isabelle (isa_belle)

yup, if i take laksa i will ask them not to put in cockles.

l'l CY (lilboymum)
Is it true that MIL not supposed to do confinement for DIL? My MIL gg to do confinement for me as im staying with her and my mother is working.
 
wingkei,
oh no.. than u got to ask ur Hb to ask wat is she doing as part of the "confinement" than.. but pls dun argue with ur HB regarding tat ok.. cool down.. try to find way and talk nicely with him.. and let him know why u would prefer ur mum.. and tat do not wanna trouble his mum.. put it in a nicer way.. think it will be fine...
 
Dear all,

Thanks so much for your advice and encouragement. I think some people would like to have either their mothers or MILs do confinement for them, but not when both want to do together. Then, it's a big headache. So now the question is, when do I talk to my husband about who I want to do confinement for me? Now or later?

And also, it would not be very nice to ask my MIL to wash my soiled clothing for me too, with my own mother, I will have the luxury to ask her to help me do things whenever I want. I don't even mind my MIL coming to my mom's house to 'help' out here and there, as long as I get to have my own mother do my confinement for me. And I'm also mad at my HB for even suggesting that my mother does the 'night' shift.

Isabelle, you are right, I don't think I can face my MIL so many hours a day as well. I mean, we get along fine now, but she will often make sarcastic remarks that are really hurting in my present vulnerable stage. She even commented that only weak women with unhealthy bodies will have spotting when I spotted earlier on in my pregnancy. I just thought that since I'm already so worried about the spotting, she should show some concern instead of making such comments. Spotting is so common in pregnancies nowadays.

@loever@, given my present depressed and stressed state, I do worry about having post natal blues after delivery. No matter what, I can't seem to be happy these days.
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mummies,
i have 2 sets of mrs wong's books since i took up FBI last time & SBI this time. if any of u not intending to take up FBI, but still wan these books, do let me know. it's a waste for the books to sit idling in my bookshelf. you have to pay for the postage or self-collect from me orh.
 
Sunrays: yesh yesh.. gotta have full bladder. do remember not to empty ur bladder b4 going for the OSCAR test. n b4 u go in.. try to drink a few more cups of water.. haha.... i noe its difficult lah.. so i was suffering on that day oso.. needed so urgently to run to the toilet.. but gotta *ren*... yet when go in.. my couz still say.. eermm... u nvr drink enuff water leh... faintz..

isabelle: eermm.... not sure where to buy leh.. coz MIL bot de.. i juz checked. the brand is Umed. its some fresh old ginger honeyed tea. yellow packaging ah. 1 big packet got abt 20 sachets. she bot for $2.00...

wingkei: hugz....
 
hi wingkei, are you currently a sahmtb? if you find yourself constantly stressed and worried over things, do try and get out for short walks now and then. it won't make your issues go away but at least it can help you cope better. some sunshine and fresh air is good for a troubled mind. you need to find a "time out" zone where you can put down your worries for a while. don't worry about hospitals, bb stuff or confinement for now – it's more impt that you maintain a positive attitude.

try to let go of it for a while ok? you need to learn to do this so you don't slip into depression. take care!
 
Hi Jaline, yes its at AMK Central but it near to the old interchange, you know where is Jubilee cinema? Its actually quite easy to find..
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Wingkei, take heart & talk to your hubby nicely. I think if both of you want to start a family together, it requires both to be committed. If only one is committed, the marriage is not going to work.
 
wingkei n mtbs,

personally, my confinement was done at inlaws, but i got depression 2nd day after delivery, coz i felt alone, even hubby was nice n close to me. but i felt so helpless n depressed(due to post-natal blues), when my mom n siblings came to visit me 2days later, i cried infront of them in my room, and my MIL saw my reddish face n nose, then she asked my mom to help her out... so then my mom stayed over at inlaws to complete my 40-day confinement.

with our own mothers, alot of things we dun say, but they know, alot of things we dun do, they also know our pattern! i felt so at ease, n started to feel tat i shld really rest during my confinement since mommy is here liao, n stop thinking un-ncessary things! then i recovered from the blues eventually...

if not, i think the 40days will feel like 4yrs... and my newborn will surely feel my anguish n depression. it's thru personal experience tat i strongly suggested tat all first-time moms beta hv your confinement done at your own mom's since u dunno wat to expect yet! (e.g. the wound pain, engorgement pain, the lower back pain, nipple pain from BF-ing, menses, sweat but cannot bathe, lack of sleep from 2-hourly BF-ing, and not forgetting to prepare for the full-mth celebration like buffet n cakes ordering...etc)

this time confinement will be done at my own place, my mom stays with me, with a maid, i really hope to hv a successful n enjoyable confinement! not so much for myself, but for the newborn n my elder girl, together as a family.

wingkei, u must be a strong girl ok! coz u will soon be a mother to your child, and our shoulders hv to be tough to shelter them!
 
hi...

jasmine..
no lah, poppy lies!!! heee...but i heard someone mentioned ILs are not supposed to touch DILs soiled undergarments. supposed to be unlucky for them. but to be frank, im not one for such hearsay, just useful when dealing with ILs loh...whahahahaha...meanie am i..

my confinement story...
quite amusing from what i see now, but then, it was quite horrid.

Ok, for my first confinement, im supposed to have my mum over to stay and do it for me. though im not that close to my mom, my sis all assured me it is a luxury i wont regret. but coz my mom works in the day, my ILs actually promise to come over in the day for a couple of hours (literally) to cook lunch for me.

ok so far so fine. but the actual confinement turn out like this...

my ILs came over only for the first 2 weeks. thereafter no more.so in the day, breakfast and lunch, i eat myself.for dinner, my mum is supposed to prepare sumptious confinment meal for me, but end up i have only one soup dish and a bowl of rice. the ginger liver, whatever the first few days all no more.coz my mum too busy with her work. my mum does catering, so she will bring food back. but i cant eat any of them coz she said it contains oyster sauve and this-that sauce which is not suitable for ladies in confinement. can you imagine eating bowl of rice and bowl of soup, sometimes double-boiled for three days, for a whole month?

i pleaded with my hb to buy food for me every night when everyone is asleep. i told him ive never felt so miserable. so hungry always. no food to eat. hb was really sweet. he knows im really hungry, and it didnt help my son was super cranky the first month and cried and cried for hours at night.

so my most sumptious meal for confinement are contraband items from local hawker centres!!!

else i'll be the only lady in confinement that starved to death! :p
 
Re: Neurogain

Sunrays, are u here? i've dropped u an email regarding my intention to purchase neurogain. i might be able to get it at a cheaper price now. trying to contact the person. so hold my order first k.... thanks!!
 
l'l cy, what a horror story. you should've tingkat-ed! i hear that some tingkat confinement food are quite yummy. i intend to do that.
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hello gals!

went to see my baby this morning! so excited, saw it stretching its legs, turning its body! Haha...

btw, I will be doing the OSCAR test next THU..

yesterday, I search in youtube for giving birth and saw a video, vividly capturing a women giving birth.. i was like OMG! nearly feeling faint..sure not for the faint-hearted.. but i say it is rather educational in a way, cause it makes u prepared in certain sense..cause you know what's happening...im still digesting the whole process, not sure if i have the courage to watch it again..

anyway, for my confinement, I feel really lucky that my mum is supportive, and i will be staying with in her house. initially, my MIL mentioned that she can help to take care of the baby, but in the end, what she meant is the baby will stay with her in her house. She doesn't want to move in with us in our house.. ermm, i think that's kinda of weird, cause that means i can't breastfeed my baby! we can't move to her house cause it's a one room flat. Haha.. so anyway, didn't want to discuss further, and turn to my mum for help.

luckily, now all settled. my mum will give up her job and take care of me and bb full-time for at least 1 yr in my house after my confinement, and we will see how from there. oh, my great mum..
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hi all mommies,

seen that many of u had taken or will be taking the oscar test, so like to ask something...

my gynae had given me an option to take either oscar test at 12th week or triple test at 16th week. wondering which is better and what is the difference? i only know the pricing between the 2 is different.
 
jessi, are u over 35? i dunno why so many mommies opt for the tests.. coz it's recommended for mommies who are over 35 or hv family history of DS. maybe it's for peace of mind i guess.

can i know who did NOT opt for such tests??
 
hi @loever@, nope i'm not over 35. like sasa, gynae just say to take the test for testing DS. even if just for a peace of mind, i guess i will still go for the test. :p abit KS, everything also wanna test to make sure ok.
 
hi sasa

okie...u let me knw if u can get lower price!! in the meantime i dun order first..

looking forward to see my baby tmr(not looking forward to needles though)....hope evrything is gonna be ok...

My MS is over i hope...no vomitting for past 4days...now appetite seems to be better...getting hungry almost every 3 hrs...gosh...
 
hi sunrays,

already replied to ur email le..
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Managed to get it at a cheaper price wor..

wah.. finally seeing bb again tmr?? hehe.. excited hor.. i understand how u feeling. u still gotta take the hormone jabs mah?? how many wks are u le??

My MS oso over le.. hehe.. now no more vomitting.. but still no appetite during dinner.. haha... ur bb is a hungry bb hor... muz eat every 3 hrs.. but make sure u eat something k. dun let the gastric juices react..
 
jessi,

ya.. agree.. juz take for peace of mind. u noe.. even tho i noe my age is not in the high risk factor.. my heart still skipped a beat when the nurse called.. haha... thank god everything's fine..
 
Hi, I'm now in 10th of my 1st child. Went for 1st appointment last wk @ KKH. So far so good, just that in the beginning I felt sleepy, feel tired very easily.
I'm going for DS test altough
 
sunrays and sasa
so envy the both of you, i still feeling nausea and vomiting(but is much much better than the past few weeks)...hopefully MS will go away very soon..dunno why i always feel more nauseated when i bathe...
 
sunrays (sunrays) : I'm also seeing my gynae tom. Looking foward to seeing my baby's development on the screen. Hope he'll let me see his penis! hehe. My cousin saw her son's penis at week 12 ... so I'm excited!
 
xuanting & Winnie: haha... u noe.. human beings are like tat... u envy others.. but yet hor.. sometimes wish that ourselves were feeling terrible coz den at least I noe that bb is growing strong... wahahahaha
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What an irony!!
 
Hi Sasa

saw yr email liao...the blue packaging is lower dosage...but dunno why the supplier said pink one better...but i compared only dosage different leh.

Aiyoh...i also hope tmr can see gender!! i'm slightly more than 12wks now.... not taking any hormone jabs at all...i meant needles as in they gonna take 3 vials of blood tmr!!
 


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