Support group - Miscarriages

Hi ladies...

We tested positive 2 Fridays ago and have since been to the gynae 4 times to try to find the sac, yesterday was 6 weeks LMP and still no sac to be found, my gynae prepped us for the worst, and advised me to stop taking my TCM meds. I followed his advice and true enough the cramps started last night and spotting has become menses-like bleeding with tissue-like discharge (sorry for the graphical description)...

Emotionally I am disappointed but not overly depressed, perhaps because I was already mentally prepared that this might have been a chemical pregnancy. It is sad, cos we have been TTCing for more than 2 years and this is the first BFP we have. Everything seems to be over so fast, jhust when we were about to come to terms that we're expecting, it's lost...

It's nice to come here and know that I am not alone. We've been seeing TCM Dr Tan at Clementi but I am not planning to go back to him until the bleeding clears.

I have a qn, many of you mentioned LRD tea and longan red bean soup. How long after the mc do you start taking these, and the tea should be consumed daily?
 


Celest,

Glad to hear all went well
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Tell your hubby if u preggy and it clashes with the holiday, it's a happy problem! My hubby and i would happily rush to cancel the holiday and forfeit the deposit.. Keke.. Things will work themselves out somehow.. Have faith
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Superwoman,

Life has its challenges.. I find it easier on myself when i don't compare myself with others.. We just tell ourselves we try our best.. Jia you! I'm sure you can do it, like your nick says, you're a superwoman
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Jo78,

Not very sure when u can start, maybe after your cramps have stopped? I started on LRD tea and food with lotsa ginger/sesame oil after my d&c.. Think red bean soup you wait till a little later.. LRD tea can take daily but if you feel that it's too heaty, can drink some warm water too, should be ok.. Take good care, sleep early and rest well.. Get well soon k..

Celest, una,

Also dunno why my mum's like that.. Haha.. Just her personality lor.. I went alone for dinner yesterday cos hubby had something on.. She spoke to me in pretty condescending and insulting tone when i told her abt my new job.. Well, maybe that's why i always wish to have a ger ger who will share her probs with me, tell me abt her bf, share secrets.. Hehe..
 
Min81 thanks for the encouragement. I'm still harboring hope that I can conceive naturally but I know in time to come, I have to leave my options open and look to IVF. Will see what Dr Su says and I guess a relaxed state of mind is critical to successful conception
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Hi Jo for Longan red date tea is a confinement drink for mothers.. but its a relatively heaty drink so you may want to substitute longan with black sugar if you are still recovering from MC. Actually MC is even more hurtful to our bodies compared to deliveries so do take care of yourself..
 
Superwomen,
Understand how u felt. It so depress to keep trying none stop but ppl ard us already concieve with 2 or 3 child. What I did was, try to avoid them as much possible. Treat urself better mentally. Dr Su will be back on the 15th but clinic will be opening on 16th dec. If u are the first patient there, u need to go there n register. By next visit, u can call n take a Q num.

Min81 & Una,
Oh yes. Even if I really got pregnant, the most cancel the hoilday.
Dun understand wat my man is stressing abt.
He might need longer time to digest those info from Dr n cause him to panic.
Anyway hope he will understand n show more support now.

Jo78,
For the LRD, u can start to drink anytime. Best is add old ginger into the drink too.
Meantime keep urself warm as much possible. Wear sock at home or during sleep.
 
Celest..
i think your hb is also anxious to have a bb....
tell him to relax !!! don't be too harsh on you....i think give him some time... he will cool down de... guys get over things faster than gals... he has been a supportive hubby, so i think he will come back to be his normal self again...

Jo78

Big Hugzz !!
as what the gals said...
Drink LRD daily.... after bleeding, you can drink Bazhen and Shi quan da bu..... Now u can cook food with Sesame oil + Ginger, good for dispelling wind... Wear Socks to sleep....protect yourself from the wind... have plenty of bed rest.... do a Very very good Mini Confinement and you will sure strike again !!! Heard that one is very fertile within 6 mths after m/c.... don't lose hope !!!
 
Thanks jhw, Celestine, CQY, and min for yr encouragement... does the confinement requirement apply for chemical pregnancy also? I guess I can ask my mom to prep those food for abt 2 weeks... I don't mind confinement food, find it quite yummy haha...

You girls are so knowledgeable about the chinese herbs, who cooks those herbs/soups for you?
 
Jhw,
Ya, Dr Su say he very anxious abt having a BB. Which is not good for both of us.
She been trying to brainwash him to take it easy, as it adding pressure to me.
My HB denial & say he actually already let go but his action dun show what he said wor. Haiz!!

He can be a suppotive hubby but when he panic, he need awhile to calm down before we can talk thing thru. I'm glad tat now we have talk things out. GUYS... Haiz!
 
JO78,
Yes u can do the mini confinement. No harm doing too.
U lucky to hv ur mum help out, i have do everything myself.
Those herb, u can actually visit those chi medicine shop, say what type u needed & they will pack for u.
Alway i will thow into the slow cooker and drink it after i come back from work. *^^*
 
Celest...
How is your hubby now?
Hope he had cool down by now....
I think maybe it is TTC stress that had taken over his emotions... but i am glad you guys had talk things out !! when is your IUI.... if you still going to see Dr Su, let her know about the IUI, so that she will know what to do....

Btw..... I go Ensure Website to ask for samples..
They sent me two samples last week... one Vanila, one Strawberry.... Vanilla i had not tried, but Strawberry is Very Nice !!!!

Jo78

yes, i think it apply for Chemical preg too...
i also think that confinement food is very yummy !! oh forget to mention, if you are outside, you could buy 麻油雞, 豬腳醋, 腰子麵線, 黑雞湯.... stuffs like this.... u can even eat durians if u like.....Do A good confinement now, get your Health right, Stay positive and Try again !!
Remember not to carry heavy things for this one month.... Jiayou !!
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Jhw,
He had went back normal self now. Thanks...
All those test result is causing him to panic.
He totally same as his mother, scare of all Dr n result. Up to mths, they will worry n panic. Until result out, they will feel at eases.

My IUI will start from tis mth. By next week my AF shd arrive.
So got to wait til 12 days onward for the scan to see my follicle.
If my follicle grow big enough, the treatment will start.
Touch wood!! if my follicle couldn't grow well, then I might need injection to help.
Now I need to take clomid again. Sianz!!

Got to confess. It been more then a week I stop taking ensure.
Realize quite hard stir in cold water, takes awhile to do it. So making me slowly lazier. Lol!!
Anyway tomolo is my birthday, so take a break from all this.
 
Celest..

All the best to your iui and happy birthday !!!!
don't worry and relax...
Ya, i also find that its v difficult to stir in cold water... but dun dare to try hot water... scared the vitamins lost...
 
jhw, thanks! All those food sound yummy! Good to know that confinement is not so hard to find outside as well, mum cooked fish porridge for me today and already told husband we will go for fish soup tonight. What is this Ensure that you guys are talking about?

Celestine, I can kinda understand how you feel, DH tends to panick at the doctor's too. Whenever there is a medical condition/diagnosis, he panicks and worries about the worst. This was even more stressful for me when we first discovered that we were pregnant and I started bleeding, he started panicking... I had no choice but to chide him that during the pregnancy, and the course of raising a child, there will be countless medical situations we will encounter, and if he keeps on finding reasons to panick, there will be no end to the panicking, he finally calmed down... I think when it comes to raising kids, women are a lot calmer than men! haha
 
Celest,

Happy for you that ur hubby's ok now
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Early greetings for your birthday tmr! Relax and have a good time with ur hubby
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Don't worry about your iui, i'm sure it'll go well
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Do you know which doc will be doing it for u?

Jhw, celest,

I find that the choc flavour is the hardest to stir.. It's much faster for the vanilla and strawberry, maybe can give it a try.. I usually drink with hubby at night so make 2 cups at once.. Will spend 15 min or so standing in kitchen stirring and mixing it well.. Haha.. No choice..
 
Celest, good luck for your IUI, don't worry abt the follicle, I am sure it will grow well... Clomid doesn't work too well on me. My doctor prescribed Clomid for me when we were trying IUI, but the procedure was called off because my uterine wall was not thick enough, apparently I do not react well to Clomid. So for the following month, my dr let me ovulate naturally without clomid and gave me a pregnyl injection to trigger the egg release...

Oh and Happy Birthday in advance!!
 
Jo78,

Clomid didn't work on me last time too.. Don't worry, actually if can ovulate naturally don't need to take it too.. Btw, the ensure milk is a nutritional supplement drink.. I started taking it cos am preparing myself for ivf in feb.. It's recommended for those on ivf cos of high protein and the vit & minerals content..

Jhw,

The other day my hubby said see me so ke lian have to stir so long, he asked how about he buy me a small blender, then can just throw powder and water in to mix, like making smoothie.. Keke.. But i dunno whether that'll work..
 
Min, yr hubby is very sweet! Is this your first round of IVF? My bleeding hasn't stopped but the cramps have subsided, my next gynae appt is on Monday and I wonder what he would recommend next for us...
 
Hi Celestine, advance happy birthday to u! N all the best for your upcoming iui. Bfp on the way dear.

Yo min, cannot use blender. Same goes for immunocal. The high speed will kill all the nutrients. I can't rem I read from where. Have to stir slowly to dissolve it de.
 
Thanks Ladies for all birthday blessing. *^^*
One year older, making me Sianz... JIAYOU!!

Jhw,
Oh yay... Im staying positive but dun dare to pin hope.
Let nature take the course, if we were meant to be a mother. Soon we will become one.


Jo78,
Guess only our guys behave so weird bah. Hahaha!
Hearing abt our pregnancy news they shd be happy, turn out they panic and we needed to calm them down instead of they supporting us. Nowadays i learn how to ignore him and allow him to calm down. After awhile he will think how crazy and wrong, he will come back to sense.

My HB been blaming himself for not supporting & protecting me enough during my pregnancy time, which stress could causes my MC. Which tat time my MIL keep pressuring me & my HB is those mummy's boy. Thanks LORD, after the MC he changes alot. He more supportive toward me then keep siding with his mother unreasonable behavior. So i keep telling myself, maybe God wanted our marriage to strengthen before giving us a BB. You JIAYOU too. Got stay positive. *^^*

Min81 & Jo78,
Til now im not sure which Dr wor, cos needed to wait for my AF arrive then bases on the Dr timing bah. Hope i able to get a good one.

Clomid didn't works well for me either.
Even i took 3 tablets, on the day 13, my follicle only grow less then 17mm. But tat time my Dr only scan one time for the whole process, so i duno if it does grow bigger afterward. Now think back, my Dr really not well concern abt my low fertile problem, each time on Clomid he will just scan one time. Even it less then 17mm, he didnt voice out the prob to me. Only recently i realize it not a good size yet. Im glad i went for more tests etc to learn abt the problem.
 
Jo78,

Glad to hear your cramps have subsided.. Continue to take gd care k.. Yup this will be my first ivf, postponed from aug, to dec, then to feb.. Everytime it's postponed, i try to convince myself maybe i've been given a chance to strike naturally.. Keke..

Gbob,

Oh okie, then i'll continue training my wrist and patience while stirring.. Haha.. But my hubby not convinced leh.. He said baby food also pureed and blended ma..

Celestine,

At least ur gynae scanned for u.. My previous gynae just ask me to eat and eat, no scans or checks at all.. I only found out much later that other pple go back for scans when on clomid.. Hmm 17mm on day 13 is pretty gd leh.. Don't worry abt it, just rest and relax while waiting to do iui
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Min81,
Wah! Ur gynea didn't scan at all? Not safe wor.
I was on 4 cycle of clomid, for the 3 times he scan me.
For the last cycle, he say i can stop coming for scanning, just TTC on day 10 onwards. I was like BLUR...

Ya.. im now sitting back and relax.
Looking forward to my holiday more then BB making now. LOL
 
hey sisters..

anyone getting multivits for your hubby? Or have gotten? Can recommend some supplement/ multi vits for men not? TIA
 
Ladies, anyone know if it is safe to still drink Dom while ttc? Is it stop once you hit bfp? I know gynae will say no alcohol during pregnancy.
 
Miloqueen, my tcm say stop once u miss your menses n bfp.
But to play safe, some ladies stop once ovulation starts.
To play safe for u too, better choose the latter
 
ChrisL,
My hubby taking Blackmoles men preformance but due to his gout issue he needed to stop.
Now he taking folic acid, zinc, vit c & vit e.
 
jhw! u just answered the qn that was on my mind for days! thanks for the post on how to increase progesterone, it says to choose organic meats instead of non-organic, $$$... T_T"
 
jo78

so qiao !!! its a good sign, isn't it !!!!
Good things will come to us soon !!
glad that you find it useful...
they recommend seeds and nuts... maybe you can get those organic seeds and nuts from NTUC to mix with cereal to eat every morning?
 
jhw/GBOB/celestine
thanks for input
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will try letting my hb see what he can get in the local pharmacy here not 1st then trying online thereafter..

celestine
happy birthday
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jo78
*hugs* hope you'll stay strong..
 
Hi All,

I used to be in the this MC support thread last year. Was trying for 3 months after my MC and got pregnant. Now I have a 2 month old baby, my 2nd child.

Would like to share my story. I had short luteal phase due to breastfeeding. As I did not want to stop breastfeeding completely while TTCing, I researched online for herbal remedies for short luteal phase and found this website:
http://www.tryingtoconceive.com/howto.htm

It says vitex fruit and raspberry leaf pills are useful for correcting short luteal phase. I was suffering from short luteal phase for half a year. So I got some from www.iherb.com . Within one month, my luteal phase went from 7 days to 12/13 days. Another 2 more months, my #2 was conceived.

I have bought excess of these pills, as I did not anticipate I would get pregnant so quickly.

Now I have some of these to let go:

1) Vitex fruit 100 capsules, 400mg
http://www.iherb.com/Nature-s-Way-Vitex-Fruit-400-mg-100-Capsules/2053

Letting go at S$4 each. Expiring in 31 Aug 2016
10 bottles available.



2) Red Raspberry leaves, 100 capsules, 480mg
http://www.iherb.com/Nature-s-Way-Red-Raspberry-Leaves-100-Capsules/2019

Letting go at S$5 each. Expiring in 30 Nov 2016
10 bottles available.

If purchase more than $10, throwing in free hpt dusted with babydust as I tested a positive sticky with these hpt. HPT expiring in 2014. Free hpt while stocks last.

Self collection at Tiong Bahru MRT/ Jurong East (weekdays only)/ Clementi MRT (weekdays only).

PM me if keen.

Good luck!
 
ChrisL, thanks! I am doing ok, the pregnancy was a big surprise for us anyway, it ended just as abruptly as it started... Jus praying the next BFP will be a sticky one!!
happy.gif
 
gals, i dunno how to put it...
but i need advise from you...

my AF supposed to be due on 13 dec, according to mobile apps (usually apps is accurate)
i did not take Basel temperature, and i did not use OPK strips...
so I do not know exactly when i ovulated...
however i simply follow mobile apps and BD (only BD one time because my hb was sick last month as i mentioned to you all before)
i BD once nearest to O date as stated by Mobile apps.

Now today, already 15 dec but my AF still not here...
i do not want to guess so i bought HPT to test
and it was negative...

Now i am looking forward to my visit tomorrow to Dr Su.... at least she may be able to tell whats wrong with my body through pulses... such as whether my AF coming soon...

its really frustrating.....

But i must admit, my cycle indeed not 100% regular... it is on average 34 days... and i was very very stressed with Work last mth... however stress level for work gone down alot this mth...

have you heard of any cases like mine?

Now i really wish my AF quickly come.... Or could it be because i did not ovulate at all such that my AF did not come....

Or should i wait for few more days to see how?
Would TTC lengthen my cycle days?
 
Jhw, it has been a while since I’ve posted. I’ve always remained as a silent reader. But I felt I need to answer your answer coz it happened to me too. After 2 months of TCM (I managed to find a TCM here in Japan.), my cycle and period became longer. I used to have 28~29 days chu chu cycle but nowadays it’s like 31 days. My period also lasted to 7 days instead of 5 days. Just this week, I went to my TCM and asked her was it normal? She said it is ok as long as it is not longer than 35 days. Longer period indicated rejuvenation…becomes younger. But period should not more than 7 days.
It is best to ask Dr. Su and maybe she can advise you.
Or perhaps before your visit to Dr. Su, you can test again in the morning? Just to be sure.
Take care.
 
minnieluv !! you are back to here !!
thanks for answering my doubts...

my period was like 36 days, sometimes 32... so on average 34... this month even worst... 37 days still haven't come... longer and longer cycle...
for my AF... usually it is 5 days... and it is very very light... dunno is it normal or not...
Okay, i shall not scare myself and wait for Dr Su's diagnose tomorrow....
 
Celest,
Happy belated birthday! Din go online yest. I will oso cancel all holiday plans n just guai guai stay at home if I do get a bfp. Glad to hear tt ur hb has calmed down. Hope ur follicle grows well!

Chrisl,
I'm not so sure abt multivits but just to share; my hb taking some cordyceps pill prescribed by the tcm I saw at BCC. Then I ks n brought him to sin chong in Chinatown n the tcm prescribed powder sachets. So tts the stuff tt my hb is taking to improve e quality of his troops.
 
Jo78,
Sorry to hear tt, hugs and hope u recover soon. My gynae asked me to avoid chicken essence n all forms of liquor, like e others mentioned, ginger n sesame oil is ok. I'm also interested in wat ur gynae will tell u on Monday, if u dun mind talking abt it la.

Jhw,
I think no harm testing a second time since the hcg level doubles everyday. But oso hard to tell coz stress does affect the cycle. Hope dr su can ans ur questions
 
Jhw,
Ur HSG might be too early detect wor.
Previously my tests shows negitive within 5 days aft I miss my AF.
After 2 week later, it show positive. So maybe it a good news.
Stay relax... Dun stress urself n think abt the AF. It will come when we stay relax. Got once I missed nearly 1 week, Dr Su saying my body dun have enegry to expel the blood. After taking her medicine for less then 5 days, my AF arrive. Dun worry ok, we are in good hand.
 
Una,
Thanks for ur best wishes.
Now I try my best to stay relax n stop worrying.
Might be the stress tat affect my follicle too. Jiayou Jiayou!! Hehe!
 
Mich,
Thanks for replying!!
Ya, i also believe that it is stress... last mth i was super stress tt i wanna quit my job... i want to test again but wah, the preg test so expensive nowaday....maybe after dr su tell me wat happen then i test again...

Celest,
Thanks for sharing your experience... it makes me feel assured that my condition is not abnormal. i dun dare to think about bfp after i see negative... just hope af come niah.... but of course if it is bfp, i even happier!!!!
 
Jhw, you can consider buying the cheaper hpt strips if bfp then confirm w clearblue? But hope this round is good news for you then you need not buy.
 
Ladies,
thanks for your wishes..
dr su say mine is not bfp... she say my current pulse is the pulse like i am having af.... but if my af still nv come, it will only come next mth... i was damn shocked... then i ask her what should i do... she say continue to bd when i have the sex desire because af never come still will have ovulation....
don't say sex drive, i think now i stress 都来不及liao...
 
where can i buy cheaper HPT and Ovulation test?

tink i am now in a state of confusion...
AF dunno where... and it is not bfp...
no up no down... dun think i will have the desire to ML also.... haha...haiz...
 
Jhw,
I know ur worries.. Try sleep eariler n rest on ur bed more.
Remember Dr Su told me tat we need lay down on bed to allow our lower body to relax.
Actually I'm now taking EPO everyday. Realize it helps my hormones balance n my AF arrive exact on the 30 days. Previous my AF will jump from day 29 to 38 days. But those ppl who had cyst couldn't take EPO. It will make the cyst come back or grow bigger.
 

Min, Celest, Miloqueen

thanks for your replies and advice...
i start to feel all the menses symptoms but menses just won't come.. i think i will just relax.... not sure if i can take leave to sleep or not... sianz.
these few days, i cannot sleep well at all... even though i lie on bed at 11 pm, it also took me 2 - 3 hours to really fall asleep... and i will sure wake up a few time in the middle of the night...

i try to call gynae dr henry cheng.... but the earliest appointmt is 9 jan... and i really dun want to go KKH... really sianz...
 
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