Support group - Miscarriages

[gracelynn]

ryes,

read yr query about clomid pills.

clomid pills are used to ovulation purposes usually taken during days 2-6 of yr cycle. this will help to make the follicles grow.

side effects of clomid includes the following, shortening yr cycle length, for some it means adjusting to a more normal cycle length (std 28 days) for others, it could mean a shorter luteal phrase if less than 28 days, assuming ovualtion happens on day 14.

a shorter luteal phrase is not good for possible conception as it means the lining will start to shed before implantation can take place.

another side effect of clomid is lesser cervical mucus which someone else have posted about. also clomid may make the cervical mucous hostile to sperm, killing them before they even reach the womb.

another side effect of clomid over repeated cycles will also cause the lining of the womb to thin, this making implanatation harder or impossible.

another side effect of clomid is that though the follicles are forced to grow and burst, the egg quality may not be good, which means even if fertlised, it will result in a miscarraige.

i know the above because i been through all of it.

althought clomid is the first line of medical intervention for sub fertility cases in singapore, a lot of local gyanes just precribe it without follow up.

in the US or UK, clomid is never taken without follow up scans to check the growth of the follicles, or even blood tests to make sure that ovulation did take place.

the maximum no of cycles one can be on clomid is 6 cycles. if after 6 cycles, if it doesn't work, it;s not likely to work.

maximum dose of clomid is 200mg (which is 4 tabs)

hope the above info would be useful to those on clomid.

sorry for the long post.

 

[ryes]

HI babymaking, thanks for the information on clomid. At least now I know more abt what is it...

 

[woof]

thewife,
after my m/c, cycle goes haywire....cycle was very regular before this incident...but den now still not back to normal or will nt go back to normal....still waiting for the 3rd cycle...todae oreadi CD39 liao...itz getting longer n longer....HELP!

 

[athlete]

hi dwoof,
hmm, have you tried taking HPT? Just to be safe...Mine went back to normal after my 4th AF only, so try not to worry...
Hi ryes,
i took 5 rounds of clomid then conceived, but unfortunately m/c at 8 weeks. This cycle, gynae put me on my 6th round.

 

[woof]

hello athlete,
tks for ur advise....took the HPT on Mon (CD35) n itz -ve...anyway was down wif a flu....n when i woke up fm the nap, I saw brown discharge....no more worries...it'z here...tks....
hopefully after this, my cycle is back to normal....did u do anything to get it back to normal?

 

[chara]

Hi dwoof..

Good for u yr AF's here. Im waiting for 3rd cycle too..CD31 now..i thought will return to my normal 28 days cycle..but not yet i guess..Then my hubby suspect my preggie..But i dont think so lah..cos i dont have any preggie symptoms..my previous pregnancy i had extremely tender breasts, etc..so sian..I dont think so.

Whats HPT?

 

[jolene_ng]

Hi Charis,
Thanks for your advice. Initially plan to seek 2nd opinion but hv to go thru all test will delay even further. I have the same problem before and have a lap op last July to remove it. As I am doing IVF so doctor have to make sure the lining are alright before can do the transfer. Now it might obstruct if embryo was implanted so will not take the risk. I hope this is the last op that I have to go through. Sigh, it's never ending. After D/C what must I avoid, heard that hv to be take mini confinement and for how long? Will the lining be thinner after e operation? Will be going next Thursday, will it be painful, kind of feeling very scare. AF will only come after 8 weeks, that is a long long wait. Really hate the feeling of waiting.

 

[puipui80]

hi gals,

its been abt 2 to 3 weeks since my d&c and im starting to spot today, my first cycle of menses is starting..

i tot it would take abt 6 to 8 weeks to come? im quite surprised but i had signs of ovulation from seeing my discharge recently. duno but i find tat ever since i have become pregnant twice, my cycles are becoming more frequent and on a normal mthly basis compared to last time which came every 3 mths instead.

does tat mean as long once i pass 3 to 4 cycles, its safe to try? and not going by mths? i jus hope i can do my embryo transfer sooner as expected.

 

[chara]

Hi Jolene..

I had a mini confinement n lots of rest after my m/c..but i didnt do a D & C. Yup..i can say that after during D & C they scrap off the lining till quite thin..so its not good to do one..but in yr case i guess its really neccessary? But the lining should be build up again..but it should take around 2-3 cycles before the womb is restored to normal state..During this time, u shouldnt exercise vigorously, dont carry heavy stuff..as for intercourse..u should abstain for around 2 weeks until the post D & C bleeding subsides..but do check with yr gynae for more advice.

 

[chara]

Hi puipui..

According to gynaes..u should have a new cycle around after 4 to 7 weeks..& a period of no bleeding for at least 20 days after the post D&C or m/c bleeding. But its ok to spot on & off during the 2 weeks after the D & C or m/c.

So the normal scenario is this;

After D & C..heavy to light bleeding lasting the most 1 week.

Spotting on & off on 2nd week.

3rd & 4th week-no bleeding, no spotting.

4th, 5th, 6th or 7th week-new cycle begins.

Some cramps occur during the recovery period because womb is shrinking, & hormones are still regulating to prepare for new cycle. But usually no ovulation takes place until 2nd or 3rd cycle.

Yup..its good to wait 2-3 cycles before TTC.

 

[puipui80]

hi charis,

i tink my case is totally different leh..i had bleeding for onli 2 days after d&c and discharge for the next 5 days..so within 1 week, i stopped all bleeding and discharge..during 2nd week, i had egg like mucus for abt 2 to 3 days followed by thick yello discharge which i believe it shows tat i ovulated..so now my menses has started today..ard 2 weeks after d&c..

i checked with my gyne and he says its ok to have menses so early cause everybody ovulates at different timing thus menses comes at different times..well, he says i should be glad tat my first cycle is here

 

[woof]

hello charis,
i had the same feeling too...i thot tat i was preggie but den i ponder for a while n said cant be...dun haf the symptoms which is very tender breasts.....seems like tender breasts is a very common sign of pregnancy amg us....
Oh HPT har...Home Pregnancy Test lor....well i tested n itz -ve so i confirm not preggie....
anyway on the dae it came was Vesak Day...i keep praying n saying pls come pls come n it happended tat i haf flu..took flu medicine n slept...den when i woke up, i realised tat my mense is here...hehe
ya..now wonder when will it resume back to normal....seems like my cycle is getting longer.....haiz

puipui,
no worries ok...as long as professional assure u tat everything is ok den dun worry too much...

hey gals,
anyone went thur pelvis ultrascan? care to share more wif me?

 

[bellsbells]

hi all,
Still feeling sad and have been searching the internet for the cause of my miscarriage. Does any one of you have case of waterbag bursting ? I had a miscarriage and my poor baby Boy Jen is already 21 week going 22 weeks. What I am still really upset is that my last gynae appt was 28th april and 3 may I had a miscarriage. I just don't understand why. All gynae could tell me is that mine was too short a notice and it all happen in the day. But on the 28th april i did ask gynae if it's normal that I feel a slight presure on my bladder and whether the weight of the baby has came down so much. it was a really scary process... the pain was so great at 7pm but I could still feel the last kick of baby jen but around 8pm my waterbag burst. I was rushed to hospital around 8.30 on my way to hospital I know baby is gone as i could feel his head coming out of him. Taxi driver was a christian and told me that everything is alright but he was shock when I told him that baby is only 5mths plus. I am still sadden by the whole episode as I had a difficult time keeping this baby. Had to be in bed for my first 3 mths till baby is stable during my early pregnancy as there was bleeding. was given jab every week and thought maybe my baby like this gynae and stick to him though he was very far from my place. but was really upset that at the hospital he told my family members that it all happened to quickly within a day and I had no prior history of miscarriage. Do we really need to go through a miscarriage before they can tell we have a weak womb or a weak cervix for that matter ? and what worst is that his clinic was closed on wednesday night and it took me sometime to finally realise that the pain was too much to bare as i was waiting for my hubby to return. I was wondering if it's normal to have transvaginal ultrasound normally? is it normal that gynae don't have 24 hour lines? we just need to get to hospital when there's pain? this is my first baby and I have longed to see him this sep. but unfortuantely he gave me the saddest mother's day gift. I saw his lovely face lieing next to me and I just cried I was so upset that I really regreted not kissing him and giving him a frist and last hug. D&C was done but i till now I dont even know if it's incompetent cervix or what... have went back to my gynae on the 11th may and he just performed a scan on my womb to tell me that it has not srink back... Does any of you have waterbag bursting just out of the blue ?

 

[puipui80]

hi bellsbells,

really sad to read abt ur story as it brought back alot of bad memories of my own miscarriage..my waterbag didnt burst but i had a premature opening of my cervix..i was ard 20 weeks at tat time and was carrying triplet boys. i was really angry with the gyne at the 24 hr clinic of the hospital cause he didnt do a proper check on me when i told him tat i had had diahreah and bad headaches with quite abit of yellow discharge..

all he did was take a doppler to hear each baby heartbeat and tat was it..even told me not to worry so much as my babies were fine and gave me some charcoal and ask me to go home..i had a heavy heart leaving the clinic as it was my first pregnancy and also a difficult one as i conceived thru ivf after trying for 4 years..the next day i had pink discharge and by the time i went down to the hospital again, it was too late..another gyne checked and told me my cervix had opened 4cm. 1 of my babies membranes was bulging at the cervix..1 of his legs was dangling. they tried to operate but my own gyne couldnt do it and next day ask another specialist to come..

but he told me to sacrafice tis baby to save the other 2 so they burst his waterbag and i delivered him..to cut story short, i had an infection 2 weeks later. they told me tat the fluid from my 1st baby water bag had turned infectious and they cant stop my contractions.

i really learned from tis experience tat gynes are damn impt..i was so angry coz tat stupid gyne didnt do a proper check..2ndly i had same problem as u..i had alot of pressure on my bladder, the weight was so great tat i felt abnormal but was told normal since carrying triplets..he even said my discharge was normal without checking my cervix. when things start to go wrong they say too late liao and they can even tell me they dunno wat to do with me. and when they ask me to terminate 1 of my babies, they said they never did tis before and im the very 1st paitient tat they are trying tis method on..i felt like i was an experiment.

i knw how much u are hurting. im still hurting inside and i cry alot esp since i jus miscarried again. but some questions u asked i hope i can answer..some gynes have a 24 hr line, u have to ask them if they provide such a service..if they dun have, then u have to ask wat to do in case of emergency..mostly, yes, i go the hospital a&e if i have serious problems like bleeding etc..but my experience is pte hospital will call ur gyne to come down. but govt hospital, u see the doc on duty. its normal to have a transvaginal scan even when pregnant but i believe tis is usually for early stage of pregnancy. normally i have a pelvis (tummy?) scan after 2 mths of pregnancy onwards. im now diagnosed with incompetent cervix and i can tell u tat its usually a painless opening of the cervix..im not sure if u have but ur gyne can do a check..after a mth when u have fully recovered, he can check to see if ur cervix is weakened or not fully closed..mine was weakened and still slighty open so confirm as having tis. u will have to wait for ur womb to shrink back as it may take up to a mth to go back to normal size.

i really hope all tis info can help u..do take care okie..i know its hard, but our babies are in heaven now. do seek a 2nd opinion if u are noyt comfortable with ur gyne..

 

[puipui80]

hi dwoof,

have u gone for any check up recently? maybe u can ask ur gyne why ur cycles are getting longer. maybe they can help to prescribe u some meds so tat u can ovulate on a more regular basis..i knw it can be tough to calculate when are ovulation days when cycles are irregular.

mm, pelvis ultraound..do u mean scan on tummy? its very simple, they will put some jelly on ur tummy area and then a handheld probe to do the scan, its painless..my gyne uses it for my current check ups to show me my womb to ensure its clear and see my ovaries as well. i hope tis wat u are asking abt and ur main question.

 

[bellsbells]

puipui thanks for your console. I think you must have felt worst. 3 babies... pui pui i used to have a friend's friend who have not been successful with ivf for 4 times and spent closed to 50k. Once when I casually mentioned to my friend that maybe chinese medicine could help and he told his friend to find eu yen sen and after half a year they really conceived and was featured in the tv. you know what their ivf gynae told them ? that theirs was a miracle !!!
Pui Pui are you born in 80 ? I am born in 73 so you can imagine... I am already going 33 this year if I still don't be fast I will be 35 and have to go through all those silly test on the baby. That's why I so much wanted this baby and have the second one by 34 or so... now looks like all's dashed. And now have to rest womb for half a year... I am really fearful that baby drop out again... my mum actually told me that if it's so painful why don't I just adopt one instead of going through all these pain sigh. I was told that stiching may be required when I conceived again but gynae told me have to be under close monitor... sigh... we've already spent a bomb for this gynae as his charges are higher than usual which I thought maybe he's better... puipui you think I should go back to him should i conceived again since he knows my history ? I can't afford another miscarriage as I'm already old

 

[chara]

Hi bells..

Im truly so sorry for yr loss & wat u have been thru..I dont know wat to say..but i understand the grief u goin thru..we all here experience the loss of a baby..its really difficult But it will heal..so hang on there.

Sometimes gynaes make mistakes..we have to rely on our 'motherly instinct'..sometimes u jus know that something is not right..its ok to ask gynae to double check. I saw 3 gynaes..cos i jus couldnt trust any..i had my miscarriage at home..without any intervention..I really came to the point that i didnt need a gynae..i jus relied on GOD's grace. But different ppl different situation..

But honestly i believe gynaes cant do much..yes they are learned, but they can only guess n attend based on knowledge..more experience may make a gynae better..but we can never know the complexity of the process of creation & development of a baby in the womb..that sometimes all we can do is pray & hope all turn out well.

 

[chara]

Hi dwoof..

Hey my 3rd cycle is here..came on CD31 on Fri nite..quite happy cos means im good to TTC after this. But menses so heavy on 1st 2 days, wasnt like that last time..its like yr cycles are new..u know wat i mean..pregnancy & m/c changes yr whole life..including yr cycles!

 

[puipui80]

hi bellsbells,

yup, im 26 tis year but whether we are young or older, dun let age burden u with worry and fear..i have been married since 22 yrs old and everybody said im so young, sure conceive easily..we saw alot of chinese sinseh, etc..but turn out my hubby sperm not good. and i had irregular periods..so no choice, i cant even do iui, a simpler version of ivf. but whether it be natural or how many babies we carry, all of them are special and wat we long for..

my hubby oso ask me to adopt cause of all the pain. my families from both sides approve of it and support it now. but im trying another time in aug so tat i dun have any regrets tat i gave in to fear when i have chance to conceive.

mm, i didnt go back to the same gyne..i switched to a pte clinic now..and yes, same as u..i have to do a stitch to make sure tat my cervix can hold the next baby. its called a cerclage and even though there are risks like infection and m/c again, the risks of not having it are even higher..i had it before, an emergency cerclage but it didnt work out as mentioned..i knw its really expensive but no choice lor..i spent close to 10k alone on gyne appts and hospital bills but tis is something tat my hubby says have to be spent..u should go and ask ard for docs specialising in high risk pregnancies..i have seen a few and they are dr ann tan from mount e and henry cheng from gleneagles..im seeing dr sh kee now..its my aunty high recommendatin.. his clinic may be old and not high class as those others but he is a no nonsense straight forward type..he said before get pregnant can do a probe on cervix to check if really have tis condition. he did my recent d&c. fees are quite cheap, at first i had reservations cause not used to not so high class surroundings but my aunt swears by him cause he have more than 20 yrs experience and i see alot of pregnant women and aunties go to him so shouldnt be tat bad.

 

[gracelynn]

dear bells,

so sorry to hear about your loss. do take care.

dear gals,

what are the pro and cons of a natural miscarriage in a early pregnancy (less than 8weeks)?

last week the gynae said to wait this week for it to happen, but to date it has not happened, then he said to wait another 2 weeks.

i do not want to put my life in limbo, not knowing when it will happen. i feel that my life is kept on hold. i can't concentrate at work, i can't go swimming because of the intermitant spotting and of course no sex.

so would like to hear yr views of natural miscarriage vs d & c.

 

[puipui80]

hi babymaking,

sorry to hear abt it..maybe u should seek a 2nd opinion..i dunno wat are the pros and cons of natural vs d&c..tat time my gyne asked me to go for d&c cause he didnt want me to be in a limbo as wat u mentioned and he said its very mentally disturbing to wait and not know when the bleeding will start. he said infection may come in if u wait too long as well.

i believe its extremely frustrating for u now..some gals may opppose to d&c as they say it may harm the womb and tat natural is very safe to do..but others say tat d&c is very safe as long done by an experienced gyne. it really is up to u and u should do wat u feel is best for u.

i tink personally there are risks to both natural and d&c. infections may occur if the placenta or remains are not expelled properly thru natural. yet problems may occur if the gyne does not do a good job and u end up with poor lining or infection. i really think u are suffering and should jus seek another doc opinion.

these are jus my opinions and wat my gyne said..others may have different thoughts..do hope tat u can get a solution to ur problems soon.

 

[chara]

Hi babymaking..

I was thinking abt u..thinking if r natural m/c has started.

As for me, I am pro-natural m/c..for simple reasons..that a mother should wait for a natural m/c to happen instead of immediately doing a D & C jus in case the baby still alive..in that time seek another opinion..The other reason is that a D & C is a invasive procedure which can cause infection or damage especially to the cervix.

Yes, the wait is terrible..I waited 2 weeks..yes, life is on hold, my hubby looks at me and thinks that im my baby's grave and he couldnt bear that, we were both an emotional wreck..but at least i knew i did my best as a mother by holding on till i knew my baby was confirmed gone..and in nature
confirmed gone is when a natural m/c happens..that's GOD's design. Sometimes, nature fail us..more so cos our bodies couldnt perform naturally, infection set in..more so in the example during later pregnancy, when a waterbag bursts n infects the cervix or uterus..it can happen in an early m/c too when some ppl jus get infection cos of retained placenta/pregnancy..but I heard from a gynae its very rare..So he believe that a natural m/c is good actually, jus tat most women dont want to wait. But usually our bodies will show us when there's trouble..in a usual sign of unexplained fever(fever w/o flu sypmtoms)

So these are my views..different ppl have different opinions..based on their own situations too. I hope u have yr answer to yr ordeal soon. Should u choose to wait out for a natural m/c..feel free to ask me more questions..pm me or something..Take care.

 

[chara]

Babymaking..U asked abt the pros of natural m/c..Well since i went thru it i can tell u some of them..besides those points i gave to u above..there are others which are meaningful too..

In an natural m/c..i would say u really suffer..intense pain, I did go thru that..but good thing is i actually had a foretaste of how labour would be..which was amazing..honestly..i can imagine n somehow would be somehow prepared how painful labour can be.

With my natural m/c happening at home, my hubby was by my side all the way..that wouldnt have happened if i had a D & C in the hospital..many women have complained how cold and uncomforting hospitals were during their m/c & D & C..how exposed they felt in hospital, etc.

The natural m/c gave us time to grief together..allowed my hubby to experience a side of my pain..it really brought us together.

And guess what..the gynae certified me well after the m/c..i recovered from the natural m/c normally..Im at my 3rd cycle already..hope to start TTC soon.

All these points are my personal opnions..not all will agree...but its up to u to make a decision. I pray u can make one wisely..and hope all turn out well for u.

 

[ps]

Hi Bellsbells,
Sorry about your loss, please take good care of yourself. There is always a reason for things that happen..
I lost mine (6-7th week) early this year and my mum recently. Life just has to go on...treasure this moment

Hi babymaking (babymaking),
Sorry about your loss too...please take care (and all those who have to go thru this in life).

Regarding your questions: I am not sure of the medical term...During the D&C, my first gynae removed too much of the womb lining and some part was sealed. I did not have my mens for 4 months before I get a second opinion from another gynae and had to have a second operation to open it recently. I am now on contraceptive pills to rebuild the lining...guess I still have to take it for a couple of weeks/months before I can consider to have a baby.
Spoke to my second gynae, she told me that it is possible to have some pills to be inserted into the cervix to open it up before ops instead of "forcing it" open. It is best you discuss with your gynae. She also mentioned to my friend that I happen to be unlucky.

Let's all just stay positive...
if we are meant to have baby, we shall have. Otherwise there will be other paths in life.

 

[chara]

Hey babymaking..our lives were on hold for a couple of weeks..it was terrible..i cant concentrate too..everyday my hubby came back early worried for me..also jus in case the m/c happened..

I put my job on hold..cos no point right..cant concentrate..
Cant exercise, cant swim, yes..but all for my own good..cos if my cervix was dilated already or suddenly water can seep in and infection can occur..

Cant have sex..well ya..but honestly i didnt have mood for it..its a time for emotional bonding with hubby..It taught my hubby patience..and he comforted in other ways, by doing chores for me, buying me little gifts, kissing n hugging..which all was a learning process for him.

But life still went on..I decided not to coop up at home...but to continue with things i enjoy..i went shopping, watched movies, go library, have meals outside, went to church, met up with friend..but not alone jus in case..all during the time i was waiting for the m/c to happen..and i also had spotting all that time.

My wait was for my baby..and myself..and im glad i did it. For me, i did my best as a mother..and im proud i went thru the pain.

 

[woof]

hello charis,
congrats...can start ur bb plan now......start working hard ok......u will succeed!

puipui,
tks for ur info....pelvis ultrascan include both abdomenial as well as vaginal scan.....i did it todae despite having my mense....a bit messy lor especially v scan.....anyway everything is done....n i haf completed my pre conception checkup...everything is ok!
regarding the longer cycle, the gynae says tat itz normal to haf cycle from CD28-35, so i guess i worry too much.....

 

[lost_wife]

Hi Ladies
I just had a very early miscarriage at 6w1d. My beta was good and one day I felt i lost the pregnancy symptoms and asked for another HCG test... turned out that the level was already very low. Four days later I started spotting followed by AF. I guess it is a natural M/C.

Questions
- Do I need to wait for three cycles before TTC again?

- Will my cycles get very distrupted after this?

Thanks.

 

[chara]

Hi ypmk..

Im so sorry..

Its not yr AF..it is the miscarriage..How is the bleeding like? Did u contact yr gynae? R u still bleeding? How many days have u started bleeding?

 

[chara]

Yes, most women get their cycles disrupted..

U shouldnt get yr 1st AF till around 4-7 weeks later..it mayb heavier than usual..n it may take more than 28 days apart..my first AF was 4 weeks after m/c and next one was on CD35.

Its good to wait at least 2-3 cycles before TTC again..so lining is build up well..n that u have time to grieve the loss..too early TTC would jus cause more stress.

 

[woof]

hello ypmk,
sori to hear tat.....as wat charis said...itz not AF n itz the bleeding from the m/c.....whether ur cycle will be disrupted really depends on individual but most of them will haf their cycle disrupted......watz impt is to rest well n recover first before u conceive again......

 

[bellsbells]

babymaking , doesn't the gynae give you jab ?
when I had bleeding at 5ht week, went to gynae and I was shock that the sac was flat. The gynae didn't want to scare me, just tell me that it's not normal but he gave me a jab and ask me to go back again in one week. But i was given a 50-50 chance of miscarriage. but come next week... the sac grew bigger though not round. than had a jab each week and finally we saw the little baby growing. we were so happy for that few months. and I thought he's staying with us since i had bleed twice and both we manage to retain the baby. but unfortuantely he left without a word on the 21 week... :~( . He was already growing fine with movement and kicks and he seems to understand when i talk to him. It's just unfortunate that my water bag burst and that poor baby must have a terrible shock when he slides out of me...

 

[chara]

hi dwoof..

Haha..yup. Well..good for u..I guess u can TTC soon too.

I didnt do any pre-conception check-up. In fact, i've not seen my gynae since March..I guess im a 'naturalist', my hubby also dont like me to see gynaes.

 

[gracelynn]

thks pui pui

will be seeing another gynae tomorrow for a second opinion. actually someone recommended that i see lc foong, i understadn u saw him also.

any feedback that u like to share?


charis,

on one hand, i don't think i have the emotional strength to wait for unlimited time. the thing is that i do not have any spotting at all as compared to my previous miscarriage.

i ahve experienced great physical pain the last miscarriage when i took the medicine for a natural miscarriage because it wasn't happening, in the end, i still had to go for a d & c. and i really do not want to repeat my bad experience. it was so bad that i puked thru out the night and had to have a emergency d & c early the next morning.

i can't put my job on hold, as it is, i have been on mc/leave for the past 3 weeks. the longer this drags on, the harder it is for me to justify to my employers.

not to mention the emotional wreck i am turning into.

it is not easy to wait for an unknown period of time, and kudos to you for doing so. but i am unwilling to put my life/career/relationship with hubby on hold for the baby which i logically know is already dead.

unfortunately the gyane i am seeing is so pro natural that he refuses to see it any other way!

i am taking puipui advice to get another opinion and see where that takes me.

hi ympk,

sorry about yr loss.

if you had miscarry naturally, the bleeding is something like yr AF with the remnants of the product of conception.

you should go back to your gynae after yr bleeding stop for a scan to check if everything has been expelled.

as for ttc, some recommend to wait 3 cycles, other gynaes say it's ok to ttc the cycle after the 1st AF (not this bleed) in order for the lining to build up.

the best person to advice you would be yr gynae cause he scans you and know yr medical history.



i am sorry to hear of your loss.

 

[woof]

charis,
yeah..but den i tink i will let it be natural lor..let nature takes itz course...
did a pre-conception checkup is to find out more abt my body.....whether i m against rubella, hep b etc...moreover my hb has thalassemia minor so i wud like to find out more abt myself.....

i m suppose to see my usual gynae this mth but den i tink i will put on hold till i get preggie coz i juz did the checkup n everything seems fine.....
hope to hear gd news fm u soon

 

[gracelynn]

bells,

u mean those progesterone jabs to sustain the pregnancy? this gynae i am seeing is quite pro natural, he says that there is no point in pumping the body ful of progesterone as it's not medically proven that progesterone will sustain a pregnancy.

he says that the hormones that sustains a pregnancy is hcg, which will in turn produce progesterone and estradiol.

i am incline to agree with him because in my previous pregnancy, i had progesterone jabs and pills every other day, but in the end still lost the baby.

 

[chara]

Hi babymaking..

Well..like i said u have to make yr decision..n I respect yr decision..cos everyone has been thru different experiences..n it takes lots of faith to go natural..yr gynae is wise actually..i believe he/she has yr health at heart..n repeat D & Cs are really risky..if not he/she will tell u to do it immediately..i've seen 3 gynaes..n i notice most gynaes will order a D&C..but if they dont..it seems they really dont think u should do it..not neccessary cos they are pro-natural.

But a second opinion is no harm..i would go too. Well i did go for 3 opinions..u say about logic..ya but logic is not truth sometimes..miracles happen..gynaes miss out things..u never know. So go ahead n get yr 2nd opinion..i hope u'll find an answer soon. I recommend my 3rd gynae..i dont like his system of seeing patients...but he's skilled n experienced gynae..his ultrasound mchine is the most up to date..he's Dr. Fong CW at Gleneagles..another good gynae i know is Dr. SC Chew from Mt. Elizabeth.

 

[chara]

Babymaking..u said u not willing to put on hold yr life for this non-viable pregnancy..well i understand..But then think for yrself..a repeat D&C is very risky..its like repeat abortions..infertility risk is there. If a gynae say dont do a D&C, i think u should consider listening..few would advised that..and yr gynae is not a knife-happy surgeon..a lot of our local gynaes jus put us under the knife n also on pills..Western gynaes r very differnt..they not so kiasu or practice happy..they really think for their patients..so if u get a local gynae who say no D&C, no pills, u should really sit up n ask why..n listen to wat they have to say. I really have to be honest with u. I've seen women who has done more than 1 D & C or even jus one..its no joke..they have suffered consequences from it.

 

[bellsbells]

hi babymaking,
I went to my gynae because he has successfully done it for my husband's sis-in-law's sister who had successfully delivered 2 babies by going through constant jabs to sustain the pregnancy. mine jabs stopped after 3rd month cause baby was growing well and i didn't bleed anymore. but unfortunately he just decide to see the world earlier than he should sigh... Do you guys go back to same gynae after miscarriage ? By the way does any of you have incompetant cervix test during pregnancy without having prior miscarriages? I am just wondering if it's a test normally done ? I really hope that time will heal faster as I am still so scared each time i close my eyes. I still can remember very vividly how my poor baby looked.

 

[bellsbells]

pui pui you switch from government gynae to private ? mine I started with private gynae and am thinking if I should go to goverment like kkh. heard from my mother's friend that kkh have a very specialised one but the charges are good as private but they give A1 consultancy and all.. I am really at a lost and since I read so so many unhappy posting with regards to kkh.
I had my D&C done in Mt A. I think I was thankful that I pick that hospital. The nurses didn't wait for my gynae as my baby already slipping out of me. they took immediate action to take out the baby but the staff nurse also went on to put her hand in to pull out my placenta. I am not too sure if that was necessary at that point but my gynae arrived shortly after to perform D&C ... They sent me a SISter to talk to me the next day and though I felt really depressed but I thought that's better than I keep thinking what happen to my baby... ... And the same sister came to visit me again the next day and my husband was there too and she try to console two of us that Baby Jen, maybe have other missions and already left to be with GOD. and that God is taking care of poor baby. I thought at least someone could tell me where's my baby instead other others telling me I am still "young" and could have another baby ! worst is i still had to hold my tears when my parents and in-laws visited. I could only cry with i am alone with my husband as I didn't want any of my kins to worry about me. I honestly felt like just joining the poor baby to take care of him that very night. Was also very thankful to a sister whom I met twice one year back through my course of work. She consoled me and told me that God had asked baby Jen to detour back to haven maybe because He has greater plans for me. I still could not give thanks even at this point in time. I am still sore as baby was so near yet so far.

 

[chara]

Hi bellsbells..

Im so sorry for yr loss..It was terrible i understand..I know wat u mean..alot of friends n family members also told me..Im still young, etc etc, i can still hve another baby..blah, blah..But like u say..they dont know wats lost cant be replaced..we can get pregnant again..but we cant replace the baby we miscarried..so the grief is more than surface, not jus a few days regret for like losing some piece of earring, or some money. But no one really understands unless they've been thru the same loss..so lets jus forgive them n move on..u need to grieve..when u do its a step to healing. I know its not easy jus to accept that GOD has taken our babies..but i believe they r in heaven..its a great comfort too.

SO take care n hang on there.

 

[lost_wife]

Ladies
Thanks for the advice... I got my flow yesterday together with a big clot... measuring 7x3x0.5cm. I was really shocked when I see that. Guess that must be my embryo. Do the gynaes test this for chromosom abnormalities etc? I am wondering if I should send this in for a test.

I thought my bleeding is actually my menses.... I am sad to hear that it is not... I can't wait to TTC again.

So, I have to wait for 2-3 cycles....does that mean TTC after another 2 AF (excluding the miscarriage bleeding)?

I am so upset and just wish to move forward.

 

[chara]

Hi ypmk..

How long did all these bleeding last? Cos im still not too sure of yr condition..maybe u should talk to yr gynae..Most important is that u have completely miscarried, expelled out all the placenta etc. A natural m/c usually begins with some spotting..this spotting may last 1-2 weeks before the actual m/c takes place. Mine happened in a day..painful cramps, heavy bleeding, gets heavier with clots n tissue, placenta, more n more stuff..than it tapers. Than the bleeding continues till abt 5 days..then it stops totally. I give u this website. www.pregnancyloss.info

Pls check it out..it give u info u if u m/c has progressed..u'll see if yr condition is normal.

 

[chara]

Ypmk..I think u dont need to be so concerned abt saving the clot for testing..cos usually the test is non-conclusive. U only m/c once so dont be so worried..my gynae said if 3 m/c than more impt to check out the cause.

More impt now, is that u are recovering..Cos if u choose to have a natural m/c at home..which i guess u did..then u must make sure u know what's going on..u have to monitor yr bleeding, n if all the contents have been expelled..then if u having fever, then better call yr gynae. Was there painful cramps etc? Are u resting at home now?

 

[chara]

Ypmk..

The miscarriage doesnt count as 1st cycle..cos its not an actual menses..So if u wait for 3 cycles..it means after 3 AF. Dont worry abt TTC now ok..u must recover first physically n emotionally. If u dont, n some women didnt, they jus stress themselves crazy in a the new pregnancy.

I understand how u feel..We all have lost a baby..some more than one. Its ok to be upset..its ok to grieve..n i guess u should..it will help u to heal n move on when u acknowledge this.

 

[bellsbells]

charis,
Yeah sometimes I do wonder why guys can take it much easier than us. Maybe they don't have the first contact with the baby. I wish I could let go and head for healing but I still remmeber how baby Jen looks each time I close my eyes. Some nights I just drink dom so as to have a peaceful sleep. I don't know how long this is going to last. I try not to cry in front of my husband now. But sometimes it's just so difficult.

 

[rnjt]

hi,

anybody knows if our hospital bills for D&C and our prenatal expenses can be claimed under Medisave, even though it's a miscarriage case ?

 

[chara]

Hi bellsbells..

Yr husband is there to share yr loss n grief..i believe he also feels sad, but i think he feels that he need to be strong for u. But do talk to him..its a time to bond n yr relationship can come out stronger after this ordeal.

 

[chara]

Hi rnjt..

Sorry im not too sure about prenatal expenses. But for a D & C procedure u should be able to claim from Medisave.

 

[lost_wife]

Ladies
Thanks for the quick reply and encouragement.

I had spotting on Sunday afternoon and yesterday evening I delivered the big clot. Still have some bleeding today but the volume is not much.. far less than the volume on first day of AF. Also, I don't have much cramps other than the half an hour before the big clot came out.

I am working... now typing from the office computer. Gynae did not ask me to rest at home. I actually thought it will come out as part of the menses. Gynae said no need to go back for scanning as natural M/C should expell everything. I don't know if I should insist on one instead.

My gynae was also quite optimistic... he said I can try after the 1st AF..... Not sure if because I miscarry much earlier at only 6w and bleeding came just a few days after.

I am so sad as I have been trying for this one for 2 years!

Would my lining get affected since I had a natural M/C and not a D&C?

 

[chara]

Hi ypmk..

Oic..Hmm..its funny that yr gynae didnt give u at least few days mc to rest..cos a natural m/c is like mini labour..u need rest..cos yr womb is still healing, n tender. SO dont exercise, carry too heavy stuff, n hold off the intercourse until at least bleeding has stopped. But if u need to rest, i suggest u see gynae or go to yr GP n ask for mc..sometimes u jus need time to grieve..to think..u know wat i mean..but i guess some women want to go back to work asap.

Natural m/c wont affect yr chances of conceiving..but both natural m/c or D&C, the lining needs time to build up again. But u should check if u have expelled out everything..jus to be sure..its ok to insist on a scan..but i suggest u wait for 1-2 weeks before seeing yr gynae for a scan..cos the uterus will be bleeding now..so the scan may not be clear. Once u have stopped bleeding, u can do a scan then check if there's any more tissue left..also u can ask for a HCG blood test..it should be very low or 0 at this point..if not then u know that there may be leftover tissue. But at any time, u have a fever, or suddenly more cramps but no big clots are coming out, then call yr gynae. As for me, I was sure that i expelled out everything..cos i bled n cramped like crazy for a couple of hours..there was lots of tissue/clots, placenta n sac too. SO all should be out..but i still went back to gynae jus to sure.

I know wat u mean..i know u really want to TTC asap..but the wait is good..at least 2 cycles, if not 3. One cycle is fine too..but thing is its hard to establish LMD (last menstral date), then its difficult to predict the age of the baby if u do get pregnant after 1st cycle..hence u get stressed..n there's this fear of miscarriage again..some time to heal n recover would be good.