Support group - Miscarriages

hi bellsbells,

my experience with kkh was not good..no one helped me thru my labour..reason - cause it was considered a termination as we opt out of nicu. they told my hubby tat to them, tat was how they handled a m/c. no dr on hand and wasnt allowed to give birth in the labour ward..i was actually in a labour ward for 2 to 3 days with medical attention and great nurses..but when my hubby said we were to opt out of nicu since babies were too premature, they had me trasnferred to a single room at a gyne ward. and the nurse told us to push by myself and said to my hubby to call her onli when he see the baby head coming out cause she was too bz with other paitients..when he demanded a dr to come, the dr said the same thing and tat if we wanted medical attention, then we got to sign up for nicu..when he said ok, bring me down to the labour ward, he got a scolding from her instead for making them bz with all his indesicions.

it was really shocking to hear tis kind of attitude from the staff. there were alot of worse things but i dun wan to mention oredi. lets jus say tat it was really shocking to experience such a thing. even though i made a formal complaint and they apologised but i really wanted to complain to moh but my hubby ask me to let go and learn from tis experience. but i wun condemn the rest of the staff, i like the other nurses and drs who were really great, but tat particular nurse and dr left me a very bad impression.
 


babymaking,

hope u are doing well..dr foong is a great dr, very caring and understanding..he very pro-baby as well..he put me on hormonal jabs twice a week with oral meds 4x a day, bt unluckily for me, even though bleeding stopped, baby not doing well as blood was increasing in the womb which affected the placenta development, etc.

when i saw my aunt gyne, he actually called my hubby whilst i was doing the d&c..he was not angry or irritated at wat i did, but said it was good tat i sought another opinion and asking the doc to do a d&c was probably the best solution for me. i really appreciated that lor cause most gynes wun say that. once when i started bleeding at 5 weeks, my hubby rushed me down to a&e and the hospital called him. he was there within 30 mins and tis was ard 11 plus going to 12 midnight, so his response was quite fast.

but im seeing another dr at nuh instead..mostly for cost reasons as doing ivf at gleneagles is quite expensive. but if i get pregnant, i will most likely see him for prenatal check ups.
 
ypmk,

charis is right, u should ask ur gyne to give u an m/c..most would give at least 2 weeks upon request i believe. however, even if u cant take so many days, at least 3 to 4 days for rest and to gather ur emotions is best for u.

do take care of urself and rest well..dun exert urself too much or u will find ur bleeding to increase instead of lessening..if increase, then its a sign tat u are doing too much physical activity.

charis, u mean d&c can claim from medisave? i didnt know that, i thought u can onli claim for antenatal check ups, but tat is onli upon a successful delivery at ur appointed hospital? anyone knows wat are the steps to claim?
 
bellsbells,

unfortunately, most cases of incompetent cervix is not diagnosed unless u had suffered a 2nd trimester m/c before..i went thru same experience as u, questioning if dr did right thing, whether they should have tested, etc..but the general response from a no of drs i went all say the same..its usually not checked cause its quite an uncommon thing to occur among pregnancies. very few lucky ones manage to discover in time and are able to save..i think it really depends on the gyne and whether he suspect or not, probably judging from symptoms.
 
Hi puiupi..

Well..when i saw the 2nd gynae at Raffles Hospital..gynae told me to go for D&C..so the nurse gave us the financial breakdown for the D&C..i saw that u can claim from the Medisave..the procedure was almost 1K..but after Medisave subsidy..was to pay around $500..something like that..I dont remember exact costs..cos anyway i didnt do the D&C. I think they should have automatically deduct from yr Medisave..why dont u check yr receipt..or some the paper..im sure they asked either u or hubby to sign some stuff right?
 
hi charis,

wow, raffles so expensive! i paid onli $400 for the whole procedure..maybe its a clinic and not hospital tat i did my d&c in. no leh, the only form i signed was a consent form to say i request for d&c..i had to pay by cash cheque though, so got no deduction from medisave, so maybe tat why no medisave form?

i will ask when i see them, thks!
 
Hi puipui,

You can use medisave to pay for your D&C procedure. I did my D&C at TMC and they processed all the paper work for me. They even submitted my antenatal bills (those I incurred at the gynae's prior to discovery of my m/c) to CPF. I didn't pay cash at all for my D&C - completely claimed from medisave. Some of my cash payment to the gynae was also refunded - paid via medisave instead. If you want to claim from hubby's medisave, your hubby must be present. HTH.
 
thks cookie's gal,

tis is something really new to me. i really need to go down to the clinic and clarify tis. i jus hope tat by doing in a clinic means im not liable to claim. will probably call and ask them later. funny thing was, i didnt have any paperwork at all, jus the consent form..really weird..but lucky u all mention, at least if can claim back, not so siong on expenses.
 
Hi puipui and rnjt,

U can claim your D&C as well as antenatal bills from Medisave by submitting all your payments to the hospital on your day of D&C... They processed all the claims for me... I didn't fork out a single cash, I even got a cheque from Mt.A....

ypmk, maybe go and see your gynae after a week after natural m/c... and maybe a few days rest @ home... Remember to have a good confinement and rest well...
 
hi gals,

aiya, i think the receipt throw away liao..i cant seem to find it..my hubby cant remember where he put oso..will have to go down to the clinic and see if can get replacement receipt and ask abt the claim as well.
 
hi pui pui how much did you still end up paying at kkh for the d/c and hosipital stay ?
Mine came out to be 3k for 3days 2 nights. half of which uses medisave.. other half cash.
But i guess i have to be thankful that the nurses at mt a were quite experienced. before my gynae came... i could see about 10 nurses coming in and out of the emergency room. two held my hands trying to console me when I was still crying. When I told the staff nurse that I could feel baby head coming out of me... she immediately pulled down my shorts and assist the poor baby out. there was alot of movement and I guess they were all trying to help... ...
 
thks for the info, i also misplaced all the antenatal receipts, have called up the clinic to give me the replacement receipts. i did my d&c in mt a, have paid $600 cash first cos the staff there quite blur, dun know if can claim from Medisave...
may i ask you all how long after did you all resume your normal activities and food?
 
Hi all,

ive just had a miscarriage (blighted ovum) about 2 months ago, since then my menses have been regular. Im paranoid of getting pregnant again so soon, can anyone enlighten me on whether it is safe to start on contraceptive jabs so soon? or is it better to wait for a few months until menses are more regular? Im worried that contraceptive jabs can cause me long-term or permanant damage. It is my second miscarriage within 6 mths. and im really really very paranoid.
 
hi bellsbells,

tat time i stayed in kkh for 2 weeks, in all we paid abt 11k to 12k , but onli manage to claim abt 3k to 4k. tat time i didnt do a d&c, cause the dr say placenta was complete. and i wasnt bleeding profusely so no need lor, they took it as normal delivery. u are lucky tat u had so much caring help and a sister to talk to u.

for 1 over hour, me and my poor hubby were left alone in the room..lucky we see alot of giving birth programs so he help me with my breathing and to push at each contraction. halfway, the waterbag burst, he called the nurse, she came in and said, yeah yeah, good. just keep on pushing till u see baby head then call me again. wah lau, cannot tahan. lucky she stayed with me when my baby really coming out tat time. but she didnt pull the placenta, she say i must push it out myself, the 2nd baby slipped out at same time lor..mus be know mummy in pain so dun wan to prolong my suffering.

we were told tat mount a, very good hospital. cause catholic? we didnt have any support at all, when i cried in middle of night, the nurse actually came in to tell my hubby to ask me to stop crying cause i was wailing too loudly and scaring her other paitients...sigh, i should have change gyne or hospital when i had the chance to..really didnt realise tat i had to go thru such a thing.
 
Hi puipui,
Yeah Service wise I think mt a is good after i see so many posting of those government hospitals. Yes mt A is catholic. They also put me in the corner of a 4 beder and that night happens only 2 of the beds were used... I guess just so at least when I cry in the night I won't scare the new mums. And my poor husband told me they handled him well too. When we were admited , they took care of me. they also let my husband rest before they ask him to do the admistration. The admin lady also told my hubby she had two miscarriages before and tried to console my husband. Night time their staff nurse do come in every 2-3 hours to check my pressure and ensure that I'm alright. I guess maybe they use more local nurses as compared to some of the local hospital that uses more mymar , ph, china nurses. I would say emergency wise I have seen their professional side from the hospital. Though one nurse mistaken me as just delivered and got me to bathe when she saw blood running down. that was the only nurse that makes me lousy. Other than that I think I have my respect for the rest of the nurses. They took time to explain to us about the claimables when we were leaving the hospital too. Maybe mt a is more expensive than others but I should think they deserve that price tag. My grandma have always used this hospital and now i finally know why.

PuiPui actually it makes me sad to see how they treated you. Really... I mean how can they be so inconsiderate... How could they tell your hubby to look for your baby head and call them when they see it... It's really sad to see that our local hospital are having this kind of service. I mean come on they are born from mothers too.. can't they show some empathy on mothers who have miscarried... I mean we are not doing an abortion !!! We are already loosing out babies.. how could they treat you in that manner. I heard some unhappy events also about kkh that's why I told my hubby we'll opt for pvt. But recently my dad's friend who's daughter also had a miscarriage before told me that her daughter later opted for a Class A service even for gynae in kkh and when she delivered she used the class A and the price was quite reasonable. I heard from that aunty that they were treated very well and that's why i thought to take a look for myself.

Sigh... actually after i had miscarried.. now than I realise that it's not that couples don't want to give birth... see so many of us wanted babies...
 
Hi bells n puipui..

It must have been really terrible for both of u..my heart goes out to u both..its ok to grieve..n i know it wont be easy..

Jus on Sun, my sis in law who's jus a few weeks pregnant invited us over for dinner..n she was ranting on about her pregnancy n showing everyone her ultrascan n kept on rubbing her tummy n smiling at everyone..n she knew i recently suffered a miscarriage but she still talk on n on..Then i sort of complain to my hubbby..n he said he thought i got over it already n I screamed at him..'Its jus 3 months not 3 years ok!..what makes u think i can get over it so fast!! n he was quite apologetic after that..hehe.

Its not going to be easy..we'll meet ppl who wont be so sensitive..n we get reminded of our loss..but life's like that i guess..but it'll make us stronger..

But at least i guess for most of us the worst is over..n lets concentrate on getting well then we can TTC again.

Hi enigma..

Truly sorry for yr loss..

What do u mean contraceptive jabs? R u planning to try again soon? Then why do u want to get contraceptive jabs? Yr cycles are regular, then its good..But if u not ready to try again so soon then i think u have to check with yr gynae about birth control, I cant comment much on birth control cos my hubby n i dont practise birth conrol..
i understand yr fear of having another m/c..Then have u checked with yr gynae if u can do a pelvic scan..rule out any physical problems..or do u have any other underlying health problems?
 
Charis,
I think there are lots of such inconciderate people around. i so scared to see childern now worst is that when i went back for gynae appt... a baby girl keep smiling at me... sigh... usally i would want to play with them but that day I almost wanted to cry out ... I was already controlling my tears. than came a very young malay couple going to the gynae for ABORTION ! sigh.. here we are trying so much to safe poor babies and there they are killing them alive !
 
Enigma...were u on clomid or have taken contraceptives before u were pregnant? Was yr 1st pregnancy, a blighted ovum too?

Contraceptives are never really good for the body..cos it alters hormones, etc n there's always some side effects..n most of it is synthetic..unless u really need it to regulate menses or for some gynaecological problem..but shouldnt use it long term..Actually safest for the body is the natural way of birth control which is the counting yr fertile days..so no intercourse on fertile days if u not planning to get pregnant..of cos the chance of getting pregnant is there..even condoms can break..hehe. So i cant comment much like i said..except that i've tried the natural birth control it works if u have regular cycles.
 
Hey bells..i understand..I wanted to cry everytime i went to the gynae too..it was terrible..n i cried each time i went to church..cos i couldnt hide my broken heart from HIM.

But it'll get easier as the months go by..
 
hi rjnt,
oh yes...i did my D&C in TMC.....so like puppy2006, i got a cheque of abt 100+ refund...the doc fee for D&C is fully claim fm medisave but the hospital charge haf to pay in cash...however, i claim my antenatal package (max $450) so they deduce $950 ($500 + $450) fm my medisave.....as the antenatal package is prorate (coz i paid partial onli) so they use it to deduce hospital charge which is less than $450 ....tat't y i got a refund of $100+.....does it sounds complicated?
 
hi gals,

charis, oh i really understand how u feel..at a family gathering just a mth aft my m/c, my sil happened to see me glancing at her baby, she immediately came forward and started to bounce him up and down in front of me, cooing and ahhing away. i simply ignored her..anyway, she was the same one tat 'cursed' me when i was pregnant, abt how my babies werent probably going to survive, blah blah..i was onli 2 mths pregnant at tat time. she was always so proud tat she was the onli 1 with kids whilst my sis and i have been trying for 1 for some years..she was totally unhappy tat i got pregnant, i really dun understand her or those who get jealous..my goodness, furthermore she was pregnant with her 2nd child at tat time.

worse was my mum and relatives kept encouraging her and my cousin's wife to quickly have their 2nd or 3rd baby. and when it came to me, they kept saying why i so quiet, etc..i mean, i just lost my babies less than a mth ago and i put aside all my pain to attend the gathering and to put up a happy face but there they are saying and doing such hurtful things..sometimes it forces to make me feel tat there is no such thing as family..
 
hi bellsbells,

actually overall kkh got some really nice gynes and nurses..especially the nurses from the labour ward..even after my m/c, the nurse actually came up to the gyne ward just to see how i was doing and to comfort and encourage me..infact, during my short stay at the labour ward, she really took care of me by checking on me more than needed and made sure i was comfortable.

but i really sway to come across tat nurse and dr..it gave my overall impression a thumbs down and brought injustice to the good work tat some of the nurses and drs are providing..my relatives and friends were so shocked at how they treated us and how could such a thing have happened.

yeah lor, now i stick to pte hospital..even though i may do my ivf at nuh, another local hospital..but i vowed that i will never give birth in a govt hospital, if pregnant, i will definetly transfer out to pte gyne or hospital..i really rather pay that little extra for better service.
 
hi egnigma,

sorry to hear abt ur m/c..i oso never hear of contraceptive jabs so cant really comment..i have been on birth control pills but was more for regulating hormones and taken onli for short durations..

like charis mentioned, u can probably try countin which are the safe periods instead of going on long term contraceptives..sorry, but did ur doc say why u m/c? there probably could be a reason behind it esp if its a recurrent 1st trimester m/c..some may be due to diabetes, etc..do have a proper check and hope u have the courage to try again when u are ready.
 
Hi Ladies
I did not ask for any MC fromt he gynae.... he did not offer anyway. In fact, I have not seen him since my first beta test.... The nurse just told me the results on the phone (on Thursday) and I only managed to speak to him for 2 minutes. Griefing wise, I had the long weekend to get over it. However, it still hit me hard when my bleeding started on Monday. After hearing what you all advised, I decided to work from home this week and take it easy.

What are the confinement thingy that I have to follow? Do you mean I have to bath in herbal substance etc? I just ordered a confinement meal delivery for dinner for 2 weeks. Is that enough? Please help me out as I am really blur her and my mum does not seem to know much either.
 
hi ympk,
It is very impt for you to have enuff rest at least for 2 weeks - 1 mth.... depending on whether you can afford to take leave...... I only took 2 weeks but the remaining 2 weeks I still continue to do my confinement foodwise.
Since you have already ordered confinement meal, foodwise you should be taken of.....

You can buy those herbs from the medical hall....just tell them it's for showering.....
It will be a good idea to get "Sheng1 Hua4 Tang1" from the medical hall as well... best to drink it ASAP. It's supposed to help you clear the blood quickly... apart from this, boil red dates, black dates, gou qi zhi, dried longgan, dang shen ans beiqi to drink as water cos you are not supposed to be drinking water now... as it might cause bloatedness. As for all the herbs (dangui), best to wait till your bleeding stop totally before drinking....

For confinement food, it depends on whether you start feeling heaty after taking all the confinement food... if you start to feel heaty, can cut down the drink and food gradually...
In the mean time (best for 1 mth) abstain from cold, cooling stuff.

Take good care and rest well... you will be alright *hugs*
 
Hi Elmo
Do you do your confinement food for both lunch and dinner?
Mine was just a natural miscarry... do I have to follow to such extent?

Thanks.
 
charis,
I saw the one at AMK Dr. Jen. It's always long queue to wait for him. but i still upset that emergency cannot reach him must go mt a and they will reach him.
 
ypmk , could you give me the confine meal catering number ? or website if you have. my poor mum have been cooking daily for me and I feel really bad sigh...
 
Hi puipui..

Its not going to be easy..but we'll hve to move on.

Hi ypmk..

Good to hear from u..Good that u resting at home now..jus in case have more bleedding..u need the rest too.

Its ok rgd yr gynae..i didnt see my gynae at all during the time of my m/c until 2 weeks later..i didnt even call him...but i prepared myself with lots of info from websites..a lot of angmoh women opt for natural m/c..so it helped when i went to the forums to find out their ordeals..i also went to medical websites to find out how natural m/c take place n how to look for complications etc..n i got my hubby to read too so to prepare him. But of cos..i think u should go back to gynae to scan that all is out..any leftover tissue can be infectious..can be lah..my gynae say its rare lah..My case, after my m/c scan revealed that there's some blood or clots left but he said very little n my betaHCG was almost 0..so my gynae said it should clear with my first menses.

I also did confinement after my natural m/c..for about 2 weeks. Jus dinner is fine also ypmk dont be too stressed over it ok. I bathed in lemongrass for 2 weeks too! But its ok if u cant..its my MIL..she's jus more particular abt these stuff..If my mum, she probably thinks its nonsense..haha.
 
Hi all...

I oso just had a miscarriage on 8th May being notified by my gynae during my 2nd visit (9wks pregnant)... Was very sad to know tt my bb's heart beat has stopped after 7th week.. 2 days later, I went for D&C... I thot I was told by my gynae tt I shld hv my menses aft 6 days of D&C but until today there isn't instead on off there were some discharge.. Can someone pls advise me?
 
Ladies
I have been drinking a glass of warm water plus the juice from half a lemon first thing in the morning. I continued doing this after I found out I was pregnant. My mum kind of said I should not drink anything sour and the lemon juice water might have caused the early miscarriage. How true is this? I will of course ask my gynae when I see him next week.
 
hi clarin,

sorry abt ur loss..i went thru a d&c and there should have been some bleeding for a few days followed by on and off discharge..for my case i bled for 2 days then had discharge for next 5 days before stopping totally. but for some it may take longer, it really depends on individual..

i cant comment on when menses would come cause oso up to the individual person's cycle. mine came abt 2.5 weeks after d&c..during tat 2 weeks, i could still see signs of ovulation, etc then my menses came. but for others, the usual cycle could be up to 4 - 6 weeks. so it really depends on ur hormonal cycle. do take care.
 
Hi ladies..

Jus had a round of tears jus now..A friend of mine who's got pregnant when I had my m/c sms me jus now..She's the one who was also been talking on n on insensitively about her pregnancy when i was going thru my m/c. Well..she sms n said..'After birth, her confinement will be 3 months(according to the Jewish/Messianic custom we follow) cos she's having a baby gal, with really chubby cheeks..n so on n that she's really happy to have a healthy baby gal inside her'. I really flipped..I was so upset..i really had it..cos she did this a few times to me already although she knew abt my m/c..So i sms back n said..'Praise GOD(i really mean it)..good for u that u can know the gender of yr baby, but for me i DIDNT SEE MY BABY'S FACE, NOT EVEN HEAR HIS HEARTBEAT. SO pls understand that im not over my loss..that its only been 3 months'..n so on..n i told her that she's blessed n that im happy for her..but i jus cant be overjoyed right now.

I was really upset..i called my hubby n cried..He said he'll see if he should talk to her abt this..ask her to be more sensitive..u know wat i mean..I really dont hve a problem with her being pregnant n all n i know she's happy, i mean i would be too if im pregnant..but I jus hope she'd n other ppl be more sensitive..I would be more sensitive..cos i guess i've been thru m/c n i know how a women feels when she had a m/c. I wish we can educate ppl abt this..

I believe we all are happy for our friends who r pregnant BUT we all hope they'd be more sensitive cos some of us r still grieving..n accepting our loss.
 
Hi ypmk..Of cos its not true..Nothing wrong with lemon juice..anyway its not that u have had an overdose of Vit. C right..so dont be so stressed over it ok.

Hi clarin..

Im sorry for yr loss..

I think yr gynae meant 6 weeks..usually u wont get menses until 4-7 weeks later. Discharge/bleeding after D&C seems usual..I had a natural m/c..my bleeding was around 1 week..then I had my 1st cycle 3 weeks later..exactly 4 weeks after m/c.
 
Im really upset..i wish i have friends to talk to..But well..nobody really understands maybe except my hubby. My best friend dont understand cos she's not married..i tried telling her..she tot im being paranoid. Another good friend although she had an m/c before, she was young then..18 years old..n its something she cant really acknowledge cos nobody else except me knows. My MIL who also had an m/c before also not very understanding..thinks i should be over it already..When i said im not..she got kind of uncomfortable. Probably only my mum would understand..cos she had an m/c before n she's always real with her emotions..but i dont want to tell her n burden her with my problems.

But i guess im glad i found this forum..At least can 'complain' to u ladies..n i know u would all understand. Thanks for yr advice ladies..hope the best for all of us here.
 
hi charis,

dun be upset by ur friend..as u said, she's really happy over her pregnancy and im sure she doesnt mean to hurt u on purpose. maybe u should just let her know how u feel.

no matter how much time passes, we will always feel sad and grieve for our loss..so whether its 3 mths or 3 years, its normal not to get over it completely..so u jus have to be strong cause there will always be families with children or friends who can conceive easily and have a successful pregnancy. dun let all these things hurt u and jus be happy that u did manage to experience the joy of being pregnant..if u read the papers, some women dun even have the chance of being pregnant depite all their efforts..jus always remember that you will have a chance to have another baby coming along soon.
 
Hi puipui..

Thanks for yr words of comfort..

But i guess..its a feeling u cant stop..it jus grabs u..n before u know it..u have tears in yr eyes..u know wat i mean..Its normal..i tot im over it..but im not..I jus want to be real n not pretend..that's why i finally told her how i really feel..I know she didnt mean to hurt me on purpose..Like i said i would be happy when im pregnant..but i would be more sensitive..maybe im also disappointed that she's a friend n she's older n more matured but she didnt show any sensitivity. But i accept it..its part n parcel of life..Im fine..I jus need to get it off my chest..like i said..i cant tell others they wont understand..at least here I know we more or less experience similar situations.
 
Hi Puipui & Charis,

Tks for the info... Now at least I'm not so worried... It has bothered me for the past few days why my menses is not here... ;p Luckily my sis-in-law introduced me to this forum.. For the past 1 week I always have -ve thinking... I can't bring myself to do anything esp. immediately after my D&C I have abdominal cramp & oso gastric flu tt I can't seems to hv any energy to do anything until 2 days ago... I kept looking out the windows blankly.. My hubby has been very nice to take 2 weeks leave to keep me company but I felt I m giving him troubles... esp. he jus got promoted recently so I really din want to affect him... so kept asking him to go back to clear his work...

As I'm staying with my in-laws, I felt I'm restricted within my room... Although they are very nice ppl, they cook confinement food for me, but I still felt very down & frustrated for nothing... I really appreciate wat they have done for me but probably it is just different when this is not your hse... Luckily I hv a caring sis-in-law (my hubby's brother's wife) who understands what I'm going through & keep encouraging me... yesterday I have a good talk with her... I really think talking to someone is impt, it may reminds us of the devastated moments that we hv been thru but it will make us stronger every time we faced it & most impt allows us to talk it out & even "correct" our
-ve thinkg...
 
Hi Charis,

well, im thinking abt not hving kids til say 3 years later? abit phobic of gynaes too. Dr Jen was my gynae the one at AMK. Seems like theres quite abit of discussion abt him in the forum. The first m/c was an accident, didnt know i was pregnant, the second one was considered an isolated case by the gynae at KKH. Some how i think its related as it happened so fast, both within 6 mths.

Thats why im thinking of contraceptive jabs, but i dont know if it'll harm the body if i take it for the next 3 years. Hv to consider it because, 1)im too paranoid to try natural birth control methods 2)i cant seem to rem taking birth control pills on time 3)ive tried evra patch and it seems scary cos the patch may fall off anytime when im exercising 4)im allergic to latex, it kinda gave me UTI twice, doc says im allergic to latex tts y.

See? i literally tried most available means except total abstinence.
 
Enigma you went to Dr Jen also ? how many weeks is your baby when you miscarry ? Mine poor baby already 21 weeks
sad.gif

Dr Jen was recommended to me. what did he tell you when you m/c ? you conceived again within 3 mths ? I am so scared also I thought i better play safe and wait 6 mths. looks like have to wait till end of the year before I ttc.... by the way I had to take hypethetis jabs think maybe it's a good time to take it after my confinment. but heard that you cannot conceive within 6 mths from the jab is it true ?
Enigma are you still consulting dr. jen for your 2nd pregnancy ? I am still thinking if I should. Just consulted an almost retired friend who's a gynae and he actually told me to stick with same gynae... I really wonder if I should...

Do you gals go back to previous gynae who handled you before your miscarriage?

Charis,
I think you should just sms her or just tell her off. I mean if she's a true friend, she will not be upset with you. but at least she's aware... I mean so at least she don't talk about her pregnancy with you... at least she's aware of it. Maybe she's doing it so as to encourage you to have a kid... but sometimes I think maybe they are not forgot that we are stil emotional about our loss... I already told my hubby that I will avoid all those family gatherings from his side till I am ready for it...
 
Hi Bellsbells,

Dr Jen was alright, but highly uncontactable, esp during public hols and his clinic's opening hrs are very short. But i find tt he might have taken things abit lightly, telling me that the second m/c is non-related to the first m/c. Somehow i didnt quite trust him after that.

The first m/c was at 6 wks, second m/c at 10 wks. im v scared and sad, and im v affected, because both were almost consecutive.

I think its safer for you to ttc at the end of the year. After all these things, sometimes i seriously cant help bt wonder what hv i done to my body and sort of resist ml w husband for the fear of yet another m/c.

I think it might be good tt you get a gynae at KKH or sth cos when you need medical attention,at least you wont feel tt your trusted gynae is not ard to help you.
 
enigma,
I think just use condom loh... rather than all those jab.... especially when you thought of conceiving... enigma.. I think nothing can bid the love for a child... I think you shouldn't give up ... my hubby sis-in-law's sister had five miscarriages all through kkh... but later she conceived and now with 2 kids....
enigma.. I too am scared... but I would still want to conceive again if God allows...
My hubby didn't see the baby but I did.. and till now I still could not forget how lovely he looked though he couldn't call me mummy... but he's perfect in my heart though he has left us so early..
sad.gif
 
Bellsbells,
i think we both just need sometime to let our body, mind and emotions rest for awhile and then we can try again. If we keep pushing and trying sooner than we can cope then its scary. Agree? but i guess i'll prob take a longer time then you to try again, and its gonna be years, not months.

Hee, look on the brightside. Tomorrow will be a better day. =)
 
hi ypmk,
I had the confinement food for 1 whole mth....I pretty much follow almost everything just like a normal confinement... I was always on the weak side for my constitution... so I wanted to take take the opportunity to build up my health.... as it'a good chance for me to take all the bu without feeling heaty....
I also went to see the chinese sinseh and he said to do confinement for 1 mth....
but do take note that everyone is different, and some people feel heaty after 2 weeks and they will stop.....

as for the lemon juice thing.. I dun think it's true... the only thing is that it's very bad for gastric and might cause gastric problem esp during pregnancy....


Hi Charis,
mine was ok... I remember it's not very bitter leh...a bit like danggui... maybe each medical hall sells different concoction.... I got mine from the chinese sinseh I was seeing....
 


Hi Clarin,

I think what your gynae means is that after D&C, spotting should stop after about 6 days. Your menses will come, depending on your cycle... I remember mine came after 28 days exactly..... but some could be later..... it depends... dun be too anxious about the menses, now most impt is to rest well and do your confinement properly.. it's very impt
 
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