Support group - Miscarriages

[Q UOTE="shaur, post: 7171080, member: 85461"]I read about so many tests in this forum until I'm confused haha. I am not sure whether there is protein s test. How did you manage the protein s issue? Take aspirin?[/QUOTE]

Need to jab clexane daily to make sure. Blood doesn't clot. Need to jab till 36weeks. And I'm also taking baby aspiring. Took it 6mths before this pregnancy and still taking.

Probably it helped me to sustain my blood flow before we detected it at 11wks. I only saw the report at 11w5d. Then start clexane immediately.
 


shaur said:
Just to share about my antibodies test. As I had 2 recurrent miscarriages, gynae recommended the tests to find out if I have antibodies that are preventing the pregnancies from continuing, resulting in miscarriages.

I did the test yesterday (already passed out the sac last Wed). The nurse took 6 tubes of blood from me. Basically will be sent to test for presence of all the antibodies (or almost all). The tests costs me $350 (did it at private clinic at TMC). Results will be out in 2 weeks time.
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I did many test all added on ard $2k for recurrent miscarriages. Ard 20 tubes I guess. So scary n always blueblack lor.
You jiayou o :)
 
baby_sparkles said:
cos my doc told me.. pcos patients dun ovulate regularly.. so the annovulatory cyst is a result of the non AF or non ovulation.. but it is not harmful.

before i started ART my cycles were between 32-40. Now im not sure cos it isnt accurate with hormone med anymore.
Click to expand...

thanks babysparkle for the enlightment...good to hear not harmful! Cos i think i have kena once or twice such cysts since after ivf and when doc scanned but he brushed it off lightly..asked him more he said it is normal...my cycle is also long de...
 
shaur said:
Just to share about my antibodies test. As I had 2 recurrent miscarriages, gynae recommended the tests to find out if I have antibodies that are preventing the pregnancies from continuing, resulting in miscarriages.

I did the test yesterday (already passed out the sac last Wed). The nurse took 6 tubes of blood from me. Basically will be sent to test for presence of all the antibodies (or almost all). The tests costs me $350 (did it at private clinic at TMC). Results will be out in 2 weeks time.
Click to expand...

Hi Shaur,

I will be doing blood test next month too to check for antibodies but 6 tubes??!!! That is a lot.
 
Chew Sok Koon said:
A lot of blood tests.... so which one should I ask my gynea to do? Or just go with the flow and see what the gynea suggests?
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I think just follow gynae's plan. But u may check w ur gynae whether it is completed test. Cos other than antibody test there is also sticky blood test which most ppl are ok b4 pregnant.
 
Give a hope said:
I think just follow gynae's plan. But u may check w ur gynae whether it is completed test. Cos other than antibody test there is also sticky blood test which most ppl are ok b4 pregnant.
Click to expand...
agree to go with gynaes plan. I also took abt 20 tubes to cover all grounds. but that's becoz we have more recurrent miscarriages. those who had one, the drs usually don't ask to test. so if ur gynae is willing to do test for u, its actually good also :)
 
Thanks ladies for the information. I will ask my gynea again.

Start to receive all bb news today - One good friend just gave birth to a baby boy. More to come in Aug and Oct. Strangely, I am actually quite happy for them and bb is really adorable.
 
Chew Sok Koon said:
Thanks ladies for the information. I will ask my gynea again.

Start to receive all bb news today - One good friend just gave birth to a baby boy. More to come in Aug and Oct. Strangely, I am actually quite happy for them and bb is really adorable.
Click to expand...

I think its a good thing, it means you had moved on already. :)
 
U r so kind-hearted, like I mentioned earlier, I kept wanting to avoid my 4months colleague due nov.

I even unfollowed those ppls on my fb everyday who will post at least a few pics on their newborns n infants. Dunno whatz wrong with my tinking & behavior oso?? Alamak!!
 
Thor, it is normal for everyone. I will have the same feeling sometimes out of the blue. My hubby keep telling me, I can't be avoiding everyone all my life and plus they are our closest friends. So we must try to have an open mind and heart. It is difficult process but slowly slowly I realised no matter how much I avoid these people, I will still feel sad once in a while and felt pity for ourselves. And plus that will not make us pregnant with a baby by avoiding others.
Why not just share the same joy and happiness with them?
 
hopeful_mum said:
[Q UOTE="shaur, post: 7171080, member: 85461"]I read about so many tests in this forum until I'm confused haha. I am not sure whether there is protein s test. How did you manage the protein s issue? Take aspirin?
Click to expand...

Need to jab clexane daily to make sure. Blood doesn't clot. Need to jab till 36weeks. And I'm also taking baby aspiring. Took it 6mths before this pregnancy and still taking.

Probably it helped me to sustain my blood flow before we detected it at 11wks. I only saw the report at 11w5d. Then start clexane immediately.[/QUOTE]
hopeful_mum, you are really brave. Actually alot of you in this forum are inspiriational lah! Jiayou for your pregnancy!
 
shaur said:
Need to jab clexane daily to make sure. Blood doesn't clot. Need to jab till 36weeks. And I'm also taking baby aspiring. Took it 6mths before this pregnancy and still taking.

Probably it helped me to sustain my blood flow before we detected it at 11wks. I only saw the report at 11w5d. Then start clexane immediately.
Click to expand...
hopeful_mum, you are really brave. Actually alot of you in this forum are inspiriational lah! Jiayou for your pregnancy![/QUOTE]
thanks babe for the encouragement. all the ladies here are brave, and many have been helpful and been an inspiration to me too. that's why nvr stop trying.
without them i may not have found out my prob, coz i wouldn't have gone to NUH etc.

so really thankful for this place :)
 
Sok Koon: I like ur positive mindset... totally agreed tat we can't keep avoiding our friends for the whole of our life especially those closest to us....

Thor, true that there might be a little bitterness seeing ppl posting pics of their newborns and infants on fb or seeing others with smooth pregnancy without any complications like we do... it's totally natural and understandable to feel tis way... but recently I hv chatted with two of my friends who hv recently given birth, they share with me tat they too went thru the pain of miscarriage before they successfully delivered their babies... so I believed tat one day we would be like them, holding our own rainbow baby in our arms...

My hubby always said everything happens for a reason... God has taken our baby away with Him coz they are nt growing (or nt healthy) so tat our baby can be our guidance angel protecting us frm heaven... so instead of feeling sad over the loss, the more we shld pull ourselves together... start to build up our body and prepare for the next ttc journey...
 
Today went for my review after the induced miscarriage.... glad tat everything is cleared, uterus lining is 5mm... according to dr, it's normal so not nid to go thru any surgical procedure... I checked wif my gynae on the fibroid which was found during my scan, she said it's ok nt to remove it since it's small... I guess it shld be alrite to leave it as it is for nw and hope my AF will come soon...
 
jannbaby said:
Today went for my review after the induced miscarriage.... glad tat everything is cleared, uterus lining is 5mm... according to dr, it's normal so not nid to go thru any surgical procedure... I checked wif my gynae on the fibroid which was found during my scan, she said it's ok nt to remove it since it's small... I guess it shld be alrite to leave it as it is for nw and hope my AF will come soon...
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when its small its okay to leave it. coz removing fibroid very invasive. i had mine removed after mc. coz it grew very big after that. then they found a few more during the op. the thing abt fibroid, high % is non-cancerous. just irritating! and it recurs. mine after 2 years, now i have a bit again. but not a hinderance to my current pregnancy.
 
I'm oso thinking of doing the antibodies test given my complicated health conditions... but my gynae told me it's expensive (costs abt $800-$1000)... I'm a subsidised pt in NUH but the O&G is under private... I think the NUH consultation fees and scan cost are more expensive than that of TMC (my 1st gynae is frm TMC den I went to seek a 2nd opinion frm another gynae frm NUH since the hospital has record of medical history)... can I still get a referral letter frm polyclinic to get subsidy for my O&G? Or shld I take the tests at TMC?
 
jannbaby said:
I'm oso thinking of doing the antibodies test given my complicated health conditions... but my gynae told me it's expensive (costs abt $800-$1000)... I'm a subsidised pt in NUH but the O&G is under private... I think the NUH consultation fees and scan cost are more expensive than that of TMC (my 1st gynae is frm TMC den I went to seek a 2nd opinion frm another gynae frm NUH since the hospital has record of medical history)... can I still get a referral letter frm polyclinic to get subsidy for my O&G? Or shld I take the tests at TMC?
Click to expand...
Actually if under nuh pte if doing completed test for recurrent miscarriages is ard $2k already.
If get referral letter u will get appt to go G clinic den from there they will arrange u to recurrent dept only gynae there will arrange all tests for u but u might need to wait up to 4 mths to recurrent unit.
Or u can try a to just ask poly refer to rheumatology dept for just antibody test. Some dr from a there will order all the test they feel require other than antibody then it can cut short ur wait.
Tmc might not know the completed test as they not work as recurrent unit in nuh.
 
Jannbaby: thank u so much for the enlightenment, I will try hard gimmi a bit of time.

The hardest issue here is all wifey n my frnds ard are either blessed with 1 boy n 1 gal and closed factory young or most of them did their marriage in a haste cos they shotgunned and held their marriage n banquet @ 3-4months pregnant stage, else blessed with 3-4kids, we realli can't sense any1 ard us having ttc issues at all.

1 close frnd of us recently jus held their 4th kid baby shower n invited us, she told wifey wanna gv birth beta do it Earli cos itz more n more taxing when women get older. She n wifey same age both Earli 30s. At that pt of time, we are still grinning within us cos at 7weeks where everything seems positive for us, who would have know less than 1week time, all is gonee!!

So sorry to rant here again, hai.. I'm basically a quite pessimistic person same goes for wifey too. Trying n trying beri hard to get over this painful scenario still realli so sorry ladies.

Thor
 
Jannbaby: thank u so much for the enlightenment, I will try hard gimmi a bit of time.

The hardest issue here is all wifey n my frnds ard are either blessed with 1 boy n 1 gal and closed factory young or most of them did their marriage in a haste cos they shotgunned and held their marriage n banquet @ 3-4months pregnant stage, else blessed with 3-4kids, we realli can't sense any1 ard us having ttc issues at all.

1 close frnd of us recently jus held their 4th kid baby shower n invited us, she told wifey wanna gv birth beta do it Earli cos itz more n more taxing when women get older. She n wifey same age both Earli 30s. At that pt of time, we are still grinning within us cos at 7weeks where everything seems positive for us, who would have know less than 1week time, all is gonee!!

So sorry to rant here again, hai.. I'm basically a quite pessimistic person same goes for wifey too. Trying n trying beri hard to get over this painful scenario still realli so sorry ladies.

Thor
 
Hi ladies
After much struggling and trying. It's really over between me and my hub. It has been a mental torture period for me despite trying so hard and yet still gonna end this 6 years relationship. Mayb that's why God didn't give us a child, they probably see this coming. I'm gonna stay very strong and be selfish for myself wanting to be happy and enjoy the life I should deserve. Sorry to be out of topic here.
 
mangohope said:
Hi ladies
After much struggling and trying. It's really over between me and my hub. It has been a mental torture period for me despite trying so hard and yet still gonna end this 6 years relationship. Mayb that's why God didn't give us a child, they probably see this coming. I'm gonna stay very strong and be selfish for myself wanting to be happy and enjoy the life I should deserve. Sorry to be out of topic here.
Click to expand...
Big Hugs babe! Don't be, do chat with us. Be it with or without ur hub take care of ur health.
Time is not a factor, nvr too late to be happy. U are a strong gal!
 
hopeful_mum said:
Big Hugs babe! Don't be, do chat with us. Be it with or without ur hub take care of ur health.
Time is not a factor, nvr too late to be happy. U are a strong gal!
Click to expand...
It just hurt so bad :( I don't even know what have I done wrong. I'm not sure how to overcome this but I guess time will heal. I will still go for the balance test and see what's wrong with me or secretly hoping that it's his prob.
 
mangohope said:
It just hurt so bad :( I don't even know what have I done wrong. I'm not sure how to overcome this but I guess time will heal. I will still go for the balance test and see what's wrong with me or secretly hoping that it's his prob.
Click to expand...
I know. See if u can take a break from work. Go for the bal of the tests. Close the chapter.

Take a break. Find someone to talk to. Ur friends, mum, here. U can pm me too. Cry and slowly find peace.

I know saying this doesn't help, I just met up with some friends and one of them just called off her wedding 3weeks before it happened. They have been together for abt 6-7years on and off. A lot of issues and finally settled. But things happen and they have decided to pull a stop.

Right now she is doing what she likes and spending quality time with herself. Her wedding was supposed to be on 8th June.

Take ur time to heal. There's nothing wrong u did. Sorry I'm not good at words but really would like to give u A big hug!
 
I guess I will go apply long leave tmr at work. I might even need to resign because both working in the same company. One will have to go.
 
Hopeful mum

You are really someone who I can always count on kinda like my strength support here! I just feel so lost now. Another sleepless night. You better rest earlier! Not good for mama to sleep so late :)
 
mangohope said:
Hi ladies
After much struggling and trying. It's really over between me and my hub. It has been a mental torture period for me despite trying so hard and yet still gonna end this 6 years relationship. Mayb that's why God didn't give us a child, they probably see this coming. I'm gonna stay very strong and be selfish for myself wanting to be happy and enjoy the life I should deserve. Sorry to be out of topic here.
Click to expand...
Stay strong. I am sure happiness will be with you.
 
shaur said:
Yes so it's best to have someone go with you & drive you home because you might feel faint after that. The nurse ask me to eat more liver haha!
Click to expand...

Oh! I was thinking of going myself. Now that I know need to take so much blood samples. I will ask my hubby to go with me then. Thanks!
 
mangohope said:
Hi ladies
After much struggling and trying. It's really over between me and my hub. It has been a mental torture period for me despite trying so hard and yet still gonna end this 6 years relationship. Mayb that's why God didn't give us a child, they probably see this coming. I'm gonna stay very strong and be selfish for myself wanting to be happy and enjoy the life I should deserve. Sorry to be out of topic here.
Click to expand...
I m not sure wat happened between both of u but I must say to maintain a marriage aso needs hard work as well. Been married for 12 years, the first 5-6 years was so rocky for me. My hsb wasn't ready for marriage He said. We were like strangers living together until one day He changed his tiking n turn back. I m not sure who is this great person managed to talk sense to him cos mil aso talked many times to him n I ever kicked him out of the hse once.. my persistent paid off though I wasted my youth now we are much better in communication.. I can only say I wasn't ready or brave enough to walk away from the marriage tat time..
 
mangohope said:
Hi ladies
After much struggling and trying. It's really over between me and my hub. It has been a mental torture period for me despite trying so hard and yet still gonna end this 6 years relationship. Mayb that's why God didn't give us a child, they probably see this coming. I'm gonna stay very strong and be selfish for myself wanting to be happy and enjoy the life I should deserve. Sorry to be out of topic here.
Click to expand...
Mango are u ok? Mbe try to sit down to talk to ur dh again? Anything can talk to us here or pm me. I ever feel of end the marriage also but thinking of it from the 1st day we know each other n how we together and the happy or sad thing we went thru from there more treasure the relationship :)
 
mangohope said:
Hi ladies
After much struggling and trying. It's really over between me and my hub. It has been a mental torture period for me despite trying so hard and yet still gonna end this 6 years relationship. Mayb that's why God didn't give us a child, they probably see this coming. I'm gonna stay very strong and be selfish for myself wanting to be happy and enjoy the life I should deserve. Sorry to be out of topic here.
Click to expand...

Mango hope: sorry to hear that... It is never easy to maintain and sustain a marriage. It takes two hands to clap and make it work. We have had our rough patch too during our initial years but we still fight n quarrel over irrational n nonsensical stuff till today

Whatever decision u make just be happy ok. Dun think so much n look forward. Come here more often to chat w us. We will be more than happy to chat w u
 
dolly_gal said:
I m not sure wat happened between both of u but I must say to maintain a marriage aso needs hard work as well. Been married for 12 years, the first 5-6 years was so rocky for me. My hsb wasn't ready for marriage He said. We were like strangers living together until one day He changed his tiking n turn back. I m not sure who is this great person managed to talk sense to him cos mil aso talked many times to him n I ever kicked him out of the hse once.. my persistent paid off though I wasted my youth now we are much better in communication.. I can only say I wasn't ready or brave enough to walk away from the marriage tat time..
Click to expand...
This is very similar to what's happening to me now, I told him I can tolerate his scolding and abuse but I cannot tolerate him not communicating or talk to me if just feels very horrible I kept on want to talk to him to like see what's wrong but he just ignore me and not coming home. I'm not ready to leave this marriage too but I don't know what else I can do. Some told me like if I can tolerate like this for the rest of the life? Do I still love him? My ans is like yes but they add on like I'm just 24 how long can I tolerate this situation. So I'm really lost I don't know which will be a better solution. Plus now he don't even wanna talk to me anymore. I really don't feel that I'm that bad a wife. I did so much without wanting anything in return. Isit so hard for him to just give me a hug or appreciate me a lil bit more?
 
Give a hope said:
Mango are u ok? Mbe try to sit down to talk to ur dh again? Anything can talk to us here or pm me. I ever feel of end the marriage also but thinking of it from the 1st day we know each other n how we together and the happy or sad thing we went thru from there more treasure the relationship :)
Click to expand...
I also think this way so I'm trying my best to ask him to talk to me but yet he just refuse. So I'm like at my wits end already.
 
baby_sparkles said:
Mango hope: sorry to hear that... It is never easy to maintain and sustain a marriage. It takes two hands to clap and make it work. We have had our rough patch too during our initial years but we still fight n quarrel over irrational n nonsensical stuff till today

Whatever decision u make just be happy ok. Dun think so much n look forward. Come here more often to chat w us. We will be more than happy to chat w u
Click to expand...
I really wanna be happy and not aching everywhere. It's just so hard so damn hard.
 
mangohope said:
Hi ladies
After much struggling and trying. It's really over between me and my hub. It has been a mental torture period for me despite trying so hard and yet still gonna end this 6 years relationship. Mayb that's why God didn't give us a child, they probably see this coming. I'm gonna stay very strong and be selfish for myself wanting to be happy and enjoy the life I should deserve. Sorry to be out of topic here.
Click to expand...

Oh dear, are you alright? I thought things are improving slowly... Please dun feel bad, just talk to us here, dun keep it to yourself, dear. You can PM me if you want.
Stay strong!
 
Wow u are so young then perhaps ur frds are rite not to waste time waiting for him. We were together for 7 years before married. By then when I was abt to give up on marriage I m already in my 30s. I tried vy hard to talk to him too but He kept to himself plus failed business. So He kind of totally shut off tat few years of marriage. It's not a easy path..
Perhaps u need to see a counsellor to see some lights urself n decide next step
 
I believed she has tried her very best. for those who are new, her hubby sometimes do mentally torture her, and he himself has some health issues too. He once got violent and knocked down their new partition in their new house using his fists, even with mango's mother around too. it's not just about the miscarriages that has an impact on the r/s , but these losses definitely do play a role i feel.

Dont get me wrong, I don't encourage or nvr do encourage ppl to part, but lets give her some morale support.

i believe that if she decides to stay on in the relationship, we will still support her too :)

mango, i hope u also slowly think it through. its hard, i have seen a few friends going through this and its a tough journey. no matter what, stay strong, and if need be, please talk to someone. don't fall into a depression. it will be very dangerous for your personal health.
 
Mangohope, if a r/s where there is abuse or violence involved, please tik twice. Tats all I can say. Protect urself n ur loved ones behind u.
 
mangohope said:
I also think this way so I'm trying my best to ask him to talk to me but yet he just refuse. So I'm like at my wits end already.
Click to expand...
U r still young yup think of it choose the best solution for urself. I have one friend called off the marriage now happily live w family n do things she like n more happy now. You must jiayou we r here to support u :)
 
I'm like tearing while typing my reports I just feel.very not ok. Colleague on mc today so I can't take leave. I am really struggling
 

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