Support group - Miscarriages

[picotin]

hello gals

happy new year and new beginnings for all of us!

sorry haven't been posting lately, so so busy at work

stopped charting because the BBT thing was a real pain and also kena a yeast infection which made it hard to monitor my CM

just wanted to update that my 1st post-MC AF arrived today, just 4.5 weeks after my MC bleed! gynae also confirmed two weeks ago that I ovulated during this first post-MC cycle (from the same ovary as the one which produced my MC egg the month before) but we didn't BD so of course, I didn't get preggers. but still, it's really good to know that our bodies can kick right back into fertility shape so quickly after a MC! hope this is encouraging to everyone!

definitely going to try this cycle - wish us luck!

 

[miffy26]

JTML...
i took some multivitamins.... containing folic acid daily for a few mths before i got preggie.... tink it helps too....
u may wish to ask ur gynae for some....
my gynae gave them to me to prep us bac then...tink will start taking again once she gave the go ahead.... when we meet up abt 2 wks time after my d&c...

yeah..2010 is going to be a better year!!

btw, miscarriage risk is 20% for 1st preggie..
dropped to 5% as advised by gynae for 2nd one...
so tat's y very common tat 1st preggie there's a miscarriage. so most impt tat we take good care of our health from now onz.
gynae says tat must watch our diet now.... eat healthy, live healthy so will have healthy eggs and sperms and not only during preggie period wor.... i will take note of those tips and hope they are useful to u too..

which gynae u seeing now ah ?

hey picotin...
glad to hear tat..jiayou jiayou!!!

 

[redqueen]

hi miffy: my gynae is Adrain Tan from TMC. Yeah he tell me first pregnancy is normal to have some bad news and tell me to try again. Actually his Vscan is no pain one so I really like him... Very positive doc which my husband like.
I taking folic acid now(sporadically) and nothing else. What multi vitamin you taking??? Thinking to get something for hubby too and myself.

Dunno if I should get mega men from GNC but my husband frown at me and say he don't need help. ahhahahah... So now I thinking if there is something less hurting to his pride....
Yeah lo I trying to cut coffee and eat at home. Less fried stuffs, etc. I also cook more broccoli lo, I don't know what else can help, And start to eat regular breakfast, my breakfast is always skipped.

 

[miffy26]

JTML... i oso from ACJ at TMC..
my gynae is Dr Joycelyn Wong... she gave me some multi vit....Prenaforte Prenatal formula...

yeah... heard ppl intro mega men from GNC too...
tink it's good bah... =)
it's a multivit for men mah.... like we gals take our multivit.. tat's for them....
psycho him hehehe

yup... i rarely exercise..tink after 1 mth..will start to work out....
eat less fried food....
hahaha..... at least we try to ctrl watever it's within our means.. the rest gotta leave it to fate liao wor

 

[dreamiez]

Happy 2010!

Babydust to everyone who have started trying

still depressing to hear friends announce their baby news. sigh

 

[ppcc]

Hi all,

Happy 2010!

Ling,shiseru - tks for ur reassurances abt my sub-36 degree BBT... hv went up to ard 36.2 past few days.. but i've been taking BBT at different times due to the holiday period, so not sure if it will be reliable this time..

JTML,Miffy - What's Megamen ah? Am trying to see if there's anything to boost the other part of the equation =p Just to share too.. I've read that wolfberries (gou qi zi) are very good for boosting fertility too.. improves quality of both the sperm and the egg.. went to stock up over the wkend liao.. thankfully it's not too costly!

 

[shiseru]

ppcc, my hubby taking GNC megamen (in fact I think I am the one started in promoting this here )

Before taking the megamen, my hubby took GNC Arginmax which promotes vitality. Coz my hubby works outside and always tired so sometimes when it comes to BD, he is 有心无力. After which, I bought the GNC megamen, this s a multi vitamin for men. And after a while, I see results and improvement. We can now BD alternate days during my fertile period.

 

[lux]

Hi Girls,

I am looking for my dowager these couple of days. Sigh.. My BBT is still high but according to pregancy test yesterday it is a BFN =( This is going to be Day 16 post O... Hopefully come faster so I can look forward to BD in 2 weeks.

I am getting to be really earning for a kid which is insane. Hopefully God will come bless us with a sucessful babe this time round.

On eating supplement for Guys, I gave up. The bottle I bought for hubby is collecting dust as I speak! I just hope they make it easier for us when it is time to BD and take their supplements!

 

[shiseru]

Ling, you maybe pregnant? Is your AF always report on the dot?

Test it in 2 days time, DPO 18, and use clearblue!!

 

[miffy26]

yeah it helps ppcc...
wolfberries are good?
haha... will stock up some soon tooo...thks!

)

 

[redqueen]

haha yeah Shiseru answer the question...heheh I was reading somewhere about supplements from the thread... should be shiseru the one discussing about it...I wanted to buy lor, then ask my husband and he give me the death stare...
Wolfberry very cheap compare to other herbs ...yes!!
My husband is very sian one lor, still look at me one-kind look when I suggest supplements. It is not poison ler...
Ling you waiting ha? good good, I think 2ww killing you right? me too, After my previous pregnancy loss, all my 2ww is torture.

Hi Lynn:
Happy New year too. Yes it is depressing but got this thread right hehehehhe and your hubby...and your freedom to go anywhere you want still.hehehhe

 

[shiseru]

hehe, looks like it's me But indeed my hubby show me result ma, vitality so much better now as compared to before when not taking.

Myself eating folic acid and multi-vitamin too.

Other than these, I bought cordyceps which we are taking once per week or bi-weekly.

I heard some mummies have difficulties asking their hubby to eat also loh. Men and their ego huh

 

[lux]

shiseru,

Dont think is preggers lah. During the fertile period we only BD once because so tired from the travelling and that day I ald registered the dip in temp ald meaning ovulation had happened. Somemore the HPT test I dont yesterday is blaring white loh.. My dowager on the dot if after O where we register the spike in temp. Hence it is so confusing for me...

JTML, waiting for dowager to grace rather to test actually. If this is a pregnancy and I cannot detect with HPT I will get even more worried because would mean I not enough hormones.

Hopefully We will get good news on our next cycle lah.. =))

 

[shiseru]

Correct lah, temp dip - BD, temp rise - dun BD mah hehe... you BD when temp dip mah

And your BBT still high worz.. hopefully it's negative HTP before positive

Nevermind, have then is all good news. If not, dun get disheartened too, jiayou again!

 

[redqueen]

wah shiseru you cook cordyceps yeah. yeah imagine me and hubby always feel tired after work. I become much more appreciative of chinese herbs after my pregnancy loss, last time my mum cook I also don't drink the soups now I really appeciate.

Ling...maybe the travelling affect the temps...you more relax during travelling one so any BD is good one.

We changed BD time to morning during holidays/weekends as realise it is more condusive. Other time just feel stressed and dissapointed.

 

[lux]

Shiseru,

Should before temp dip than BD right? If dip liao means too late ald.. sigh.. Anyway now I keep running to the toilet to pee.. just to check for dowager also.

JTML, you are right any BD is good during holiday. Just that we only started frequent BD after my temp spike. That is my hubby.. always like to go against any plans I have. Arrgghh!

If I even bring up this BD in the morning thingy I am sure the middle of the night romp we have he will strike it off.

 

[redqueen]

hahaha marriage is like that huh, if everything testbook so boring right...hahahhahah
It like my company all the chaos in meeting deadline and all the problem come up and then somehow delivery time, all the isssues slowly solved already, so when launch successfully really happy one....

 

[shiseru]

JTML, I dun brew, the cordyceps i bought is grind to powder form, so just mix a little water and take. Well, gonna ask my mum to brew with balck chix or chicken essence (what do you think, is this the correct way?) I heard it is good loh.

Alamak, morning BD hehe we difficult to get into the mood leh. Coz half awake

Ling, my friend's gynae said, BD when your temp dip, and stop when temp rise. So yeah if you temp dip means ovulating is happening (not happened) So good to get down to business. But of coz, if can BD prior to that and one more time duing O, that would be best la. I hope you catch the eggs

 

[lux]

Jtml,

Ya lah in a way but than again we have a mission to have a cub so have to work on it mah. Actually I ald told him yesterday if he want to be 50 and still tending 2-3 years old kids we can do it his way. So he is a little pcyche we will get down to business from the CD11 - CD24 alternate days.. LOL~

Shiseru I like cordyceps brewed soup! I used to have bad lungs when I was a kid so cough and asthmatic very often. My mum than cook cordyceps for me monthly (at that time not so expensive) and I outgrown all the aliments. During my MC recently my dad went to China for visiting chong yang festival and bought back some to bu my health. A little bit only $700! Freaking exp!

Okay now I get the temp dip to BD sorted at least wont backfired next cycle

 

[shiseru]

Ling, what did you brew with cordycep?

Wow you so on Ling, BD from day 11 to 24! I probably BD day 11, 13 and 15, then full stop liaoz! >D

 

[dreamiez]

JTML:
yeap! we planning to go japan in march. after that then think about trying again...

 

[pixietree]

Hi Shiseru - is it MegaMan - Vitality and Performance? I saw MegaMan sports and 50 plus too...so wasn't sure.

Will get my hubby to try it too.

 

[florida]

Hi picotin
my AF has reported too!! 39 days after d/c

whew... wat a relieve! happy to know that system has some how rebooted

 

[shiseru]

pixie, ask the GNC personnel. It's GNC megaman, it's multi vitamin. Not 50 plus hor, that's for men over age 50

Lynn, i also going to Hokkaido during CNY. Happy trip to you and me, hope it helps us to relax and ease our anxiety ^^

 

[lux]

Shiseru,

Cordyceps brewed with lean meat or black chicken. Very simple one and very yummy.

I just want to share that I retest the HPT again yesterday night and it was still white *blah* but today I tested with first morning urine and I saw a faint positive!

I am a little overwhelmed right now because hubby is travelling for work and if I tell me mum she will say I told you not to try so soon!!!It's killing me so I decided to let it out with my sisters here. I am just hoping for a sticky one this time.

 

[shiseru]

Aaah Ling Faint positive line?! Today is how many DPO? Hope the jolly bean sticks around this time! Might wanna pop by your gynae and get the hormones med to stablize the pregnancy. Good luck Ling!

Okay, cordycep brewed with lean meat, yup indeed yummy

 

[lux]

Shiseru today 16 DPO.. It is a little weird because my first pregnancy 14 DPO can ald detect this time round 16 DPO can only see faint line. Now worry.. what's more I am down with a major cold.

I made appt to see my endo doc to see if my thyroid is okay and gynae will be next on list. I am just afraid of going too early cannot see anything than worry relentlessly.

I wish all the girls here become preggers this cycle! We come a really long way through the tunnel.

 

[optimusprime]

Ling!!!

That's such good news!!!

Did your gynae advise to visit early the next you preggers? If yes, then better go.

Are you taking medicine for your cold? If you are, may consider taking the safe-for-preggers type of cold medication, just to err on the safe side.

Cheers!

 

[redqueen]

I don't know how to brew cordyceps...hahahha anyway my family don't use much, only recently after the D&C then I buy bottled one hehehhe...
Ling:
that means cordyceps quite good for lungs hor...
Shiseru:
yeah lor we try to BD mornings on only weekends and holidays...but it worked for us last month because so many holidays lor. Else cannot lah ...sleepy and rushing.

 

[lux]

OP,

I hope this good news will last for eternity and not short lived... I going to make appt with gynae too just to be safe. After that mc incident it make all these news surreal. Like it will not turn out good or somthing.

Just called my GP and he assure me is pregnnacy safe and since I had a very high fever yesterday so insist I need to continue to take it otherwise it may affect the growth of the little one. We are indeed cycle buddies! =E

 

[lux]

JTML,

Very easy one.. just throw maybe abt 5 pieces of cordceys, put a piece of lean meat inside. Put it in a tun zhong and than in a slowcooker and 4-5 hours later you have your bowl of soup. Can check with the medical hall.

I really believe it is good for lungs. Anyway the taste I like lah... but maybe not everyone.. because I like chicken essence but some people say they taste like yeeeeeeeeeeeeee..........

 

[ppcc]

Wow... congrats Ling!! So happy for you!! u must take care ah... think positive!!

 

[redqueen]

eh Ling:
O goodness, hahahhaha come on!! you have faint line, I only saw your faint line comments when I F5 just now....
Just so excited for you...and OP ...Goodness, you know why... both of you from March thread one right....

 

[pinky123]

Congrats Ling,

Take good rest!! Try not to worry (I know its difficult) But u know, worrying, not going to do u any good.

Happy to hear the good news!! More to come, GALS!!

 

[twinkle_33]

Congrats Ling ^^

Hope more good news to come from all the ladies here! Including myself ...hehee

 

[joanne03]

Hi Ling
omg... So happy for you!! Congratulation to u... Stay relax k..

Take care. May i know ur this cycle is after 2nd or 3rd mc after ur mc last time?

Hi gals
me also in 2ww now and af will report (touchwood) on wed or thurs in no bfp.. Anyway, my temp this time not so high compare with last time when i got a bfp so dun think got any hope.. Also not feeling well for past two wks..Lack of sleep..last night suddenly 冒冷汗。。is this ok? not sure wht happen to my body too.. Sigh.. But i did try twice during my o period when my opk turn positive too.. Hope can hv a healthy cub baby soon.. Gals, lets jiayou and now with op and ling will gives us alot of baby dust.. We hope the waves continues...

 

[joanne03]

Oops.. Sorry ling, i mean ur 2nd or 3rd af after ur last mc .. Stupid me to key wrongly.. Sorry..

 

[lux]

Hi Girls,

Thanks for being supportive.

Just taking a day as it comes. After that last hype I know nothing is affirmative after 9 months. We will surely see more girls getting preggers. Be strong! We will see light!

Jo,

My dowager wane away for 12 miserable weeks after the MC and this pregnancy happen after 1 AF..

JTML and ppcc... Ex March 10 MTB must all jia you together.

 

[dreamiez]

Congrats Ling! please take good care of yourself now!

 

[shiner]

Hi forumbb,

My heart goes out to you as I also recently had my DNC done on New Year's Eve. DNC is never a pleasant procedure and I had mine done under local spinal anaesthesia as I was having a cough & flu. Spending the New Year in hospital was not the most comforting either; I insisted on discharge 6h after my procedure. So I finally got home around 1+am on New Year's Day.

My baby stopped growing at 8 wks 3 days. Husband and I had just heard its strong heartbeat at the gynae in the 7th wk of this first child we were expecting. So it was quite a shock. We suspected my long drawn cough & flu for the past 8 weeks probably didn't help.

I only bled 2.5 weeks after the baby had stopped growing. I opted for a same-day DNC done at KK as we figured Mt E was too expensive where my gynae saw me that morning. What was supposed to have been a max of 6h procedure became a 14-h ordeal especially since it was New Year's Eve and a public hospital.

You have a choice of immediate DNC or naturally after 1-2 weeks. But as you mentioned, the pain and cramping can be quite severe, uncomfortable and the heavy bleeding can be quite a shock for some. The evacuation ensures that the uterus is cleared of everything. If not, should infection set in later on, that can lead to decreased fertility in future.

Do drink plenty of hot longan red dates tea daily, take plenty of nutritious soups and rest well at home.

If you need to talk more, please feel free to send me a message.

Blessings,
shiner

 

[miffy26]

Hi shiner and forumbb,
sry to hear tat.
take good care n rest well

shiner, i oso had my DNC done on New Year Eve.
Hope things are better now for u.
I still having mild menses till now.
All are well for me.

Hi Ling, Congrats!! Very happy for u...At least u're many steps ahead of me.... !! Going strong....jiayou jiayou wor take xtra care wor.....


Hi all, wat things to take after DNC to "bu" our body?

Only took the red longan dates tea everyday. Nothing else liao

Tot of gg to TCM to get my body in a good shape to conceive again..... any good recommendations please? Many txs

 

[miss_shann]

Ling Ling~~~~

So glad to know about your GOOD NEWS!!!! Am super thrilled for you! Jia you ok? Now my turn to tell you to be positive! kekekeke...

Do visit your gynae and probably have to take duphaston. Start your folic acid ok? Have you been taking too?

My appetite is bad, lost weight too.. couldn't eat much in taiwan =(

 

[florida]

hi miffy, shiner and forumbb,
sorry to hear tat

i had my d/c done on eve of hari raya haji @ KK. started with bad cramps at 2+am in the morning but disappeared after a while. went to work as per normal and only when i went to pee pee before leaving the office at 7pm+ tat i realised i had spotting of fresh and old blood. went to see the 24hr women's clinic that evening and doc said that baby stopped growing at about week 7 (i was suppose to be week 8 then). There was no heart beat detected. Was admitted immediately, fasted for about 4 hours and had the d/c at 11+pm. totally knocked out by GA. Was discharged next day afternoon after the docs made sure i could pee first

i am actually not one who is very conscious of 'bu-ing' myself before the m/c but i told myself that i really needed to put in effort to build myself - at least i know that ,my little effort can help with future pregnancy to some extent

during the 2 week mini confinement i cooked chicken soup every day.. slow cooked with either ba zhen or other herbs tat one can get pre packed from the supermarkets or chinese medical hall. also had steam cod fish with ginger slices and sesame oil. plus my daily dose of chicken essence or fish essence every morning (which i am still taking every other day after 1.5 months of the d/c) and a cup of dom at nite.

jie meis.. must take care of yourselves ok. hugs..

 

[shiner]

Hi Cin Cin: Thanks for sharing.

Hi Miffy: chicken soup always helps unless you're having cough. My mum also cooked pig's stomach soup for me. The soups can be quite heaty; so if you're someone who gets sore throats easily from these soups, it'll help to space them out.

The hot/warm longan red dates tea every day was really helpful with reducing the bleeding. Continue to monitor for clots, heavy flow and cramps/nausea from the anaesthesia before the next follow-up appointment with the hospital.

You can also take chicken essence about 1 week after DNC and fish essence 2 weeks after DNC. Avoid Dom Benedictine until 1 month after DNC to ensure no further bleeding. Bathe with warm showers and do get help for housework as you really want to concentrate on getting well, rebuilding your health and prepare for the next try. In the 1 month, rest completely and avoid vigorous activity, which probably includes intercourse.

The medical advice is 3-6 months after DNC before you try again for another child but there have been cases where surprises spring up just short of 3 months.

The physical healing comes as you rest but it is the emotional and mental healing that are equally important and which many might not get a chance to address adequately.

I've taken leave for 2 weeks and am home bound. Thereafter, I'd also be working from home. I'm thankful my company is understanding and flexible in that. It's really like a month long confinement. Don't walk around too much; don't lift heavy things. We may look ok on the outside but the wounds are still raw on the inside. Bleeding still takes place 1-2 weeks after the DNC.

KK only gave 5 days' MC but I'm taking 2 weeks to rest my body and recover. My husband and I have also taken time to grieve, share about our fears, struggles, concerns and any misgivings we might have towards ourselves or others. We also sought forgiveness from one another (& our unborn child) as well as extended forgiveness towards others whom we felt might have contributed to the miscarriage. After sharing our thoughts, we bade farewell to our unborn child as a closure. It's good to air these burdens but it differs from couple to couple as some are less expressive and might take some time to isolate and process their thoughts before they share.

Grieving is important especially before your next child comes along. The last thing we want is to carry emotional baggages over which our next child would feel as well.

We still acknowledge the tears as they come and feel the loss but we know we will come forth stronger and closer as a family.

Blessings!

 

[redqueen]

Hi Miffy:
You can take confinement dishes also and if those are troublesome...You can take chicken essense. 1 small bottle every other day.

The confinement dishes can be very simple one like Kailan and chicken fried in sesame oil and lots of ginger.

I also drank DOM.

Actually had those confinement dishes even after on and off cos I like sesame oil and ginger lah... hahhaha. If you having cramps still, the ginger will help a bit....

 

[miffy26]

thks alot for sharing the "mini confinement" tips.
Yeah, I better go get essence of chken n some other recommended food for myself tonight. =)

yeah shiner, I agree with u.
must try to overcome the grief and to take extra care of our body during these period off from work. In fact, I am still resting at home now.

tot i've got over the grief of the baby loss...
until few days ago, got to hear from 2 closer frens that they're also pregnant and their baby is ard the same as mine (if my baby is still ard). I am really happy for both of them, but became sad for myself.
Cried again, thinkin my baby will be the same age as theirs..... also, can u imagine come the delivery date, will definitely think of my baby will also be delivered close to their EDD had my baby is still around... haiz...
I certainly hope to get outta of this soon.... :")

one thing out of this quite unfortuate incident which we all have no ctrl in, i learn to appreciate my family and hubby more having been showered lot of TLC during this challenging and stressful times. I believe u all have experienced that too... it's the power of love that gradually lessens my pain of loss and motivates me to try for the next baby!!

My miscarriage is probably due to the fertilization of an unhealthy sperm or egg. So also trying to see a TCM to "tiao" and "bu" my & hubby's bodies. Also, trying to read up tips to minimize such losses. At least we try our best to do wat we can, the rest leave it to God's hand.

GAMBATE all MTB.....

 

[redqueen]

hi Shann: you still come back and encourage haaa... so nice of you....hehehhe....

Cin CIn: Same lor, I never take notice of the imaportance of "bu" until after teh D&C end August 2009 Take care yeah... It really teach me a good lesson, my take is my body was not ready to support the preganancy...

Shiner: It is good you take more rest. I had 2 weeks medical leave lor, then after that went back to work...then still was feeling tired.

 

[florida]

ya lor.. we must take care of ourselves cos no one else can take care of u if u dont

it was a trying time cos it was my 1st preg. imagine ...family n frenz were all so excited .. and subsequently disappointed and sad...i felt so down.. that i let myself, hubby n loved ones down... but but..its natures way of QC lor as what my gynae said.. regardless am very thankful for loved ones and really good friends and co workers who rallied around me

 

[miss_shann]

JTML: Ya lor! Silent reader all along even when i was in Taiwan hehehehe.. sometimes will pop up!

Cin Cin: Same here, I was so excited last time, so did my in laws and friends, my MIL immediately went to look for resale flat near our area the 2nd day she knew i was pregnant. Only my mum was not excited, she told me not to be overly excited, and told me that i was still young, there are many things in life that is unpredictable, wah she damn zhun lei....... i should have listened to her, not to tell anybody, because i hate to make ppl disappointed, and feel sad together with me, was so scared that my in laws will blame me too.....
luckily they didn't, cuz their own daughter also had mid term miscarriage b4..

So this time round, i haven't even broken the news to my own parents, and in laws. But some close friends know about it.. keep it very low profile still..

I really feel better this way now.. my mum will be so shocked knowing that i am pregnant for almost 3 months. She will definitely scold me for hiding from her, and went travelling!!!

She is very protective one lor... even until now, i am already 27, need to go anywhere still must ask permission eh.. then my relative that day seeing me asking my mum whether i could go to somewhere with cousins, she interrupted our conversation and asked, then she make love with husband need to ask you or not? hahhaa!

Ok totally out of topic now, i better stop.

I still love her la.. haha!

 

[florida]

Shann...can imagine how pleasantly surprised your mommy will be when she finally knows of the good news!! hee hee! so EXCITING!!!

ai ya nui er hor will somehow always be mommy or daddy's little girl la

my mom was so sad ..and family members just so sweet... she cooked dinner for me and hubby on the day i got discharged and sister carried the food to my door step in the olden days aluminium food carrier.. the type with 3-4 layers one with pattern and handle on top? i was so xin xuang cos they were hurting inside and yet still so caring .. sigh.. family... precious...