Support group - Miscarriages

[shirubia]

Hi millie. Actually I do not know what type of genetic test. I read it from this American website on genetic counseling.

http://www.marchofdimes.com/pnhec/4439_1106.asp

This website is pretty informative. They talk about anything about babies, miscarriages etc.

http://www.marchofdimes.com

Perhaps can check it out & highlight to your gynae.

I did ask my current gynae but somehow he said I should try again. Unless I have 3 consecutive miscarriages, then he will advise tests or else not necessary. Sigh. Guess that gynaes work differently.

 

[millie]

dear tiny and bebechic, thks for info. think my case like bebchic. i hv been spotting on and off since morning. but to play safe, i hv been wearing a pad.

silk, i check out the websites u provided. very detailed but i didn't read in depth as there are so much info. but it seems tt they r taking blood tests for analysis too.

think i'll wait for the report. i'll be seeing doc in 2 wks' time. is there any questions u wld like me to ask?

most gyanes don't encourage testings after the 1st miscarriage. guess it cos for most pple, it's a one off case thing. my gynae usually wait for 3 miscarriages too but this time, he suggest to test for me and hubby cos he said my 2 cases are similar. so it'll be gd if can find out why.

u can still insist on the testings if ur hubby and u strongly feel so despite ur gyane's suggestion.

as for now, guess both of us better take care of our body 1st.

 

[shirubia]

Hi millie_ang. The blood test that you done is it genetic testing? Perhaps can enlighten me once your doctor has advised you. Thanks.

Oh yes can you help me to ask whether there are any side effects if we take too much folic acid ie >5mg but <10mg on a daily basis. Thanks.

Yeah we must take care. Me currently eating confinement food. Mom &amp; hubby been cooking sesame oil + ginger type of food. Been having them for the past 1 week. Have to eat for another 1 week. Oh yes do drink DOM as well. Take care ok.

 

[tiny]

Hi Silk,
Folic acid is vitamin b, which, like vitamin C is water soluble. if you take too much, your body will just dispel it. so no side effects, only that it's 'wasted'. That's what I've been told, so don't have to worry about taking too much.

In fact, my dog managed to eat some of my folic acid (it's somewhere in the earlier posts!) - she just grabbed it and when i got it back, a few tablest were missing! I was so relieved when nothing happened to her after that. haha...(but maybe it helped in her ovulation that month?

)

Tiny

 

[tiny]

Dearest everyone,

Wishing all of you a prosperous and very blessed Lunar New Year! Thank you for your support throughout the year, and may we continue to find comfort and hope in our conversations with one another.

May we be blessed with good health and healthy children in time to come!

Tiny

 

[folic]

Hi everyone,

Happy New Year! Let's all hope that the year of monkey will bring us all better health and luck

Silk, actually, I have chatted with some American women in a forum board and most of them also says that gynaes will not do detailed genetic testing until that woman has 3 consecutive miscarriages. If you feel that it will give you the peace of mind by testing, then I think it will help you recover psychologically. I checked with my friend who had lost her baby due to chromosmic disorders. She did not go through any testing cos she had one healthy normal baby before and she subsequently gave birth to another baby as well. Hope this info helps. You might also want to go to www.fertilityfriend.com. You will find many ladies who went through similar experience as you and you might find out more from them on whether they had done any tests. I know that many have gone on to have successful pregnancy.


Millie, how are you? Hope you are resting well.

 

[shirubia]

Hi Tiny. Thanks for the info on the folic acid. Very funny to know that your dog has eaten some.

Hi folic. Thanks for the info too! Going to check up the website. I guess I'm still at the 'shock' stage. It's been only a week since the baby died. Hence dying to test this &amp; that. Too 'ks' I think. Haha. Thanks again.

 

[folic]

Hi Silk,

I think it is normal to feel that way. In the first week after my loss, I was washing my face with tears. (You can read my old postings as well). For my case, the doctor cannot find out what causes my water bag to break. I just have to learn to accept it. I am slowly building up confidence to try again and am currently trying. Hopefully, I will be successful this year!

Hi Gals,how's the CNY celebration so far? Generally, I had fun but there were some difficult moments cos if my baby had survived, we would have been celebrating teh one month celebration during CNY as well. Relatives have been supportive so far and no one pressured us for kids or asked about the baby. It's just some moments that I feel a little sadness when some friends who did not know about it asked when we have kids or wish us have a kid next year. But overall, I survived. I enjoyed CNY at my in-laws cos it is a big family and everyone gathers for reunion dinner (my husband and his 7 other brother's famiies, and two sisters who come back on first day)It is a nice and warm feeling.

Hope all of you have a nice day!

folic

 

[millie]

hi everyone,

how's ur cny? mine is ok. spent yest going to in-laws and my parents' place.

of course, relatives asked the usual question but i was shocked at my parents' place when my mother actually blunted out abt my m/c last yr. dun know to thk her or to be angry with her. but well, the fact is out (except they dun noe i hv just gone through one) and it's kind of funny when i see the relatives turned fr being inquisitive to embarass and sympathatic.

asked my mum later why she go and tell pple. she said nothing wrong. must let them know tt we are trying. i dun really understand my mum's behaviour. intend to just keep my m/c within the family but since it's out, it's out.

folic, thks for concern. pyhsically i m alrt. besides drinking chicken essense and yang ming jiu, i eat everything. but emotionally, i m still healing.

i hv asked before abt the bleeding but i m still puzzled. i always thot bleeding will last for at least a wk. but i hv stopped bleeding since 2nd day. i m concern tt the blood is not expelled fr my uterus. but so far, i dun feel pain or discomfort. is it the same for u?

pple say this yr monkey bb very gd and so, hope to hear gd news fr u.

silk, hope all's well on ur side. today is rest day for us. not going anywhere. just staying at hm.

 

[folic]

Hi Millie,

actually, sometimes it is good for it to be out in the open. cos then, ppl will stop pestering you to have a baby. Like this year, everyone just steer clear about us having babies but many of the closer ones will wish me good health.. with the implicit wish that I can have a baby soon. I liked that.

Have a good rest. My friends are coming over now.

folic

 

[folic]

oh, one more thing, I think the bleeding part is dependent on individual. I think cannot use my case to guage, since I carried my baby till second tri. Will you be going for follow up checkup soon? I think the doc will check you again then.

folic

 

[shirubia]

Hi millie. Thanks I'm fine. Still thinking abt my baby but don't cry so much now. Have been resting at home &amp; doing nothing. As for the bleeding, I think it's up to individual. Like folic, I carried mine into the 2nd trimester. I have heavy flow for the 1st day (14/1/04), moderate for the next few days &amp; currently spotting. If u are worried, how abt checking with your gynae during your next follow-up appt?

Hi folic. Take care &amp; good luck for your trying!

 

[ecbaby]

Hi Gals,
I'm sorry that we have to go through this. My heart goes out to you all. I hope to get some emotional support here. I had an early m/c at 6 weeks on 27/12/03, D&amp;C was done on same day. I'm still devastated by this ordeal and has been crying very now and then though one month has passed.
No test was done as my gynae told me that normally early m/c is due to chromosome problem and considered random. I took folic acid when TTC but dunno why such thing still happen. Gynae put me on progestrone support during my 1st visit, and injection when i start to bleed the day before i m/c, but it doesn't help.
My 1st AF came on the 3rd week after D&amp;C and it was very heavy and last for 7 days. It is not like my normal AF which usually last only 4 days. I just hope that my cycle will return to normal again. I'm ready to TTC again but there's fear too if i got preggie again. Sometime i dunno why i have to go through this. Am I unlucky or what. I just hope that God can give us strenght to overcome this and bless us with another gift.

 

[bebechic]

hi ecbaby,
dun cry alone yah. come in here and talk to us. there are actually many who m/c early but i believe most people do not know. some m/c naturally like yourself through bleeding. its very common so don't feel so bad about it. my gyane told me that chance of next preg being successful is 85%. so dun worry so much. people whom i am very close to like my own mum and cousins also had m/c and usually the first preg.

i too am afraid of the next one. freaking out big time too!!...dun rush into TTC just so as to replace the last one. have enough rest and "bu" your body for the next one before you try again.

take care!

 

[soyabean]

hi ecbaby...
sori to hear of ur loss... but dun keep thinking of the past... must be forward looking.

such early m/c is nature's way of getting rid of abnormal pregnancies. and yes, it happens to abt 25% of all pregnancies.

failing the 1st time doesnt spell doom for the next.

its oso natural to feel fear when u get preggy oso. i went thru the same phase. when i got preggy again after my m/c, the initial stage was a nightmare for me. i tried as much to keep an open mind... and i think it is impt to keep urself positive. and be careful in everything dat u do, eat etc. i hv overcome the stage, despite hvg spotting and slight bleeding in my 1st tri.

u can do it too.... in fact, i believe all the ladies in tis thread will be able to overcome their fears.

 

[millie]

ecbaby,

sad to read abt ur loss. do grief for ur loss but dun dwell on it. like wat soyabean says, got to be positive and look forward.

my usual cycle also lasts abt 4 days but i had a very heavy flow for my 1st AF after m/c too. subsequently, my AF went back to normal. dun worry abt it yah.

i believe all of us here fear of next pregnancy cos we had experienced the feeling of lost. but we definitely got to be brave and go through TTC and pregnancy again so that we can have healthy babies.

u can always come here to share ur thoughts. we will be here for u. do take care!

 

[ecbaby]

Hi bebechic,Soyabean &amp; Millie,

Thanks for the encouragement &amp; advice. I'm glad to have you gals around for emotional support. Yes, we should always stay postive and look forward. My hubby kept telling me that after all the crying and griefing, we got to let go and move on. I'm still learning to cope but i believe time will heal.

I'm so sad after reading m/c experiences that you all hv been through,but you gals are really strong. I believe that we can all overcome the fear and hv healthy babies!

Actually i duuno much abt chinese tonic, my mum cook ba zhen for me after D&amp;C, i also took DOM. I can't take too much tonic cos very heaty, will get sore throat if too much. Now i only take folic acid and mutivitamins. It is enough?

After this m/c, my collegues kept telling me to change gynae. I dunno whether i should as I'm comfortable with him plus he caring too. They said that he did not respond fast enough when i start to bleed. Instead of going to A&amp;E straight, he ask me to go bedrest at home and see him later at night at his clinic. Injection was given then, but during that time the sac is still intact. I only start to m/c the next morning when bleeding get heavier. I went in to see him and D&amp;C has to be done cos cervix already dilated. Now i just dun want to push the blame to anyone cos already happen. I believe that it just not meant to be. I dun feel like changing cos need to explain the whole event to the next gynae, very troublesome. My next visit is 2 weeks later, dunno what to expect as no test was done.

 

[millie]

dear ecbaby,

i really don't know if an earlier examination wld hv saved ur baby but i hope this will help u - for my 1st m/c, i went to see the gynae for 1st time when i started bleeding. i was abt 6 wks then (i intended to see gynae at a later date).

before the gynae did a vaginal scan on me, he told me that if my baby is still living, he wld give me hormone injection plus pill plus lots of bedrest to try to save the baby. but this doesn't guarantee the survival of the baby as for some reason, my body may still resist and choose to expel the baby. and for most cases, our body will naturally expel the baby if there's abnormality especially in early stage of pregnancy.

and i also remember reading that there's nothing much a doc can do when the cervix starts to dilate.

but may i ask if ur situation is the same as mine? u mention tt there's a sac. did the gynae detect a heart or a heartbeat? cos for both of my cases, i had blighted ovum where there is no foetus growing within the sac. so it's pointless to continue the pregnancy as my body will eventually expel out the sac.

i am really so sorry to read abt ur case but since it had happened, we've got to accept it and move on. time may not erase the memories but it will help lessen the pain.

gynae usually doesn't do testings after a 1st m/c as there is a high chance it's a one time mismatch between the sperm and the egg. ur next visit shld be for the gynae to ensure that ur uterus is 'clean' after the d&amp;c and there's no complications/infections. he may want to advise u on when to start ttc again. don't worry too much abt it yah.

as for changing gynae, the choice is up to u. if u read my postings, i went for a 2nd opinion and the 2nd gynae is professional and very patient when i told him abt my history and my case. as to which gynae i wld go to when i get pregnant next time, i really don't know. i m back to my 1st gynae now for checkup as he did my d&amp;c and i am waiting for test results.

as for tonic, i hv been consuming bai feng wan. apart fr that, i still eat everything. i hv stopped taking folic acid for the time being. i will wait for the test results 1st. but do continue to take folic acid if u plan to ttc. multivitamins wld help but remember not to take too much of them. u can ask ur gynae for advice.

do take care and be positive yah!

 

[folic]

Hi ecbaby,

hope you found some solace after discussing with us in this group. I went through a similar debate on whether to go back to my current gynae.At times, I find myself wondering if things would be different if I had a different gynae but for my case, I think she has done all she could for me and to save the baby. It is an unfortunate incident that had happened and for my case, I don't think it would have been any different. I find that it is quite common for family and friends to 'blame' the gynae.. I think it is one of their ways of comforting us and telling us that it is not our fault. a

If you had not been with this gynae for long and would like to switch to another, I think it's not a bad idea. I might do the same but am hesitant cos she has my medical records. Whatever it is, please remember never to blame yourself for what happened.. it is something that had happened and we can only learn to accept it. Sometimes, there just isn't any reason. As for supplements, I am taking folic acid and bai feng wan. You can take bai feng wan after your first menses cleared. I usually take it once every month, after my menses ended.

Hi Millie, hope you are feeling better.

folic

 

[ecbaby]

Hi Millie,

My gynae didn't mention anything abt the heartbeat. I've been temping since TTC so I knew that I'm preggie on the 1st day of miss AF. I went in to see him at a very early stage and he did a vaginal scan and manage to see a sac. As it is only at 4 weeks+ he mentioned that the baby is not really form yet and will see how baby growing during my next visit schduled 2 weeks later. He gave me hormone pills to support the pregancy as i'm spotting lightly. The spotting stops after i took the pills. Everyting seems normal.

The bleeding and cramping started suddenly a few days before my scheduled visit. I was in office then and i called him on the emergency no as his clinic is closed that afternoon, he was at MT.A doing some surgery. He didn't ask me to see him straight away at MT. A, but to go home and bedrest till evening to see him at his clinic.
He did another vaginal scan and found that the sac still attached to the uterine wall. He gave me a high dose of hormone jab,pills and advise plenty of bedrest for the next few days. But he did tell us to keep fingers crossed that the bleeding will stop after the jab. Otherwise m/c is inevitable.

I went in to see him the next morning as bleeding doesn't seems to stop, he did vaginal scan again and check the cervix. The utrasound showed that the sac had become smaller meaning part of it has already pass out of my body plus cervix already dilated, I didn't doubt him much and quite trust his competence. All in all nothing about heartbeat is mentioned. I'm not sure whether it is a blighted ovum, he never told me that too. So i believe that's some abnormalities and body expel out baby despite the high dose jab. But pple told me that he should had given the jab earlier not when i start bleeding. Anyway, I'm not sure too. Like you say there's nothing doc can do when cervix starts dilating.

I've seen him 1 week after D&amp;C to check for infection and abt TTCing again. But he told me to see him again 6 weeks later that is 2 weeks from now, not too sure what it is for. Maybe just to check whether my AF has come.

Millie, what the test results you waiting for? Do keep us posted cos I think maybe mine is due to some chromosome problems.

Sorry for the long post. You take care and stay postive ok!!

 

[ecbaby]

Hi Folic,

(((HUGS))) You are a brave gal, and your gynane had tried her best to save your baby. You and your baby had fought hard. It's an unfortunate event, both gyane and us don't want this to happen, but sometime things are not within our control. There are many uncertainies in life, as we goes along we will learn to cope and accept it. Have faith in God and pray for strenght to overcome.
When bad things happened, pple tend to pinpoint who is to blame, I think that it is not right. What already happen is over, so they should give emotional support rather than finding who's at fault. Maybe they meant good, but at a wrong way.
I think i will not switch gynae though I'm with him not long, his clinc very near my place plus there's night clinic. He's caring and sensitive so is unfair to blame him for the event.
Ok, i will go get some bai feng wan as per your advice. Thanks!
You gals are in my prayer and I believe God will give us healthy babies. Meanwhile take care! Cheers!

 

[fionau]

Testing,

 

[fionau]

Hi Alls,
Above is my gal Ally. Just took few days ago.

 

[fionau]

Oh! sorry! I post to wrong thread liao!

 

[millie]

i still love to look at new born babies but there's an abnormal sense of longing within me. i feel it's abnormal cos i never had such longing until my 2nd d&amp;c. so frankly, it excites and hurts to see the photo. but fion, if u happen to read this, ur daughter is very cute! love her big eyes!

ecbaby, i had a hard time with my mum cos she still thinks that my gynae has not done his best for me. but i think my gynae is experienced and professional. despite the fact that i think he lacks some emotional support, i still trust his judgement.

as this is my 2nd blighted ovum, he sugggested a testing for both myself (blood tests) and hubby (sperm test). he didn't specifically say what kind of tests they are for. see what he will say. i will be going back this tues for checkup and the test results. will update u then.

folic, i am ok. thks!

crossing my fingers abt the results this coming tues.

 

[tiny]

Hi girls,
I am back after a long break. Have still been reading your posts once in a while but didn't write much, was feeling kinda lousy lately. On the 2nd day of new year, while we were at JB, my AF came knocking...this made me very, very sad and i felt so lousy cos this month we really worked very hard, and I was faithfully taking my temp, which showed that I did ovulate this cycle. I know that there are many who have been trying for years before they succeed, but I guess I just am so afraid that i won't be able to conceive naturally. somehow after the m/c i feel so insecure about my ability to conceive again.

My gynae told me that he wouldn't put me on any fertility programme as yet, since I managed to conceive once before, but he mentioned that after a few cycles if i still don't, he may put me on one. I don't know if 3 cycles is considered "a few" or not. I don't really want to see go through any fertility treatment either.

Just so xian about the long waiting time since each cycle takes almost 40 days...it reminds me of the time i failed my driving test twice, and each time i cried cos the waiting time was also very long!!!

I try not to think about it, but the more i surpress it, the more I feel the burning desire in me...till the point i think i'm obsessed with the thought!!!

ok.....just need to get that out of my system. thanks for listening.

 

[tiny]

Dear ecbaby,

sorry to hear about your story. i think the others have already assured you that we all can find solace in each other and that makes it easier to cope. hope you recover soon. As for your check up in the 6th wk, it's just a follow up to make sure everything's fine, perhaps like u say to check if your AF is here, and that things are back to normal. my gynae requested to see me 6 weeks after d&amp;c as well, and then 14 days after my 1st AF. I was actually seeing him regularly after that cos he wanted to check my follicles and to see if i ovulate properly, till Christmas when i stopped going cos i found the whole process quite tiring...supposed to go back after new year but never did.

For now, do take care of yourself.

 

[folic]

Hi Tiny,

good to see you post. I can empathise with your experience in temping. Look on the bright side. At least the chart tells you that you are ovulating. If you find temping too cubmersome, why don't you try observing Cervical mucus instead? I find that it helps..now, I record the day I first see the egg white cm. And without fail, I would know that my AF will come about 14 days later. This is a sign of ovulation as well. Now that I am TTC, I hope that instead of AF at the end of 14 days, I will find a BFP. btw, my cycle is also very long - 35 days. So I know how you feel... and your eg of driving test.. brings back memories.. I failed my first driving test too.. hit a curb at the circuit!! I was so so sad, I cried all the way home. Then I got ready for classes in the afternoon at NUS. On my way from AMK to NUS, I cried again

I did not alighht when I reach NUS.. I just took the bus back to Clementi interchange and went back home again! But in the end, we all got our license right?

Hi ecbaby, I don't think I am particularly brave. I just know that there are people who have gone through similar experiences and have gone on to have successful pregnancies and I pin my hope on that.

folic

 

[tiny]

Dear Folic,
Thanks...that put a

on my face! Hey, I took my driving test at Ubi, and I also cried on the MRT on the way back to classes at NUS! I had to close my eyes to pretend I was sleeping, and try hard not to let the tears flow out. That was the 2nd time I failed...But you are right, somewhere along the long tunnel there WILL be light. Just that I seem to have become a pessimist over the last few years...Guess this long-drawn process will really make us appreciate what we have more in the end.

So you've started TTC? That's wonderful. We'll all try together. Really praying that there'll be good news to share soon.

Millie, how are you? Your test results will be out soon right? Hope all will be fine. Meanwhile, must look after yourself well.

By the way, what is this bai feng wan you girls are talking about? What is it for and where do you get it? I have no idea about Chinese medicine, tonics, and stuff like that.

Tiny

 

[shirubia]

Dear ecbaby, very sorry to hear about your loss. I lost mine 3 wks ago (posted in this thread earlier). I can understand how you feel. Do take care of your health ok.

Dear Tiny, you can get the bai feng wan from Eu Yan Sang. I heard from my mom that Eu Yan Sang is famous for their Chinese medicine, tonics &amp; stuff. It costs around S$40+ per box. My sister, who is single, is taking it as a supplement once a week as she has heavy discharge. It works for her. As for me, still thinking whether to take it or not because I'm still taking pre-natal supplements &amp; folic acid every morning. My hubby told me not to mix chinese &amp; western supplements. Anyone here can clarify this?

Dear all, me just went for my post D&amp;C gynae checkup on Sat. Asked my gynae whether the need to do a genetic/ chromosome testing &amp; he advised me not necessary unless I have another similar case ie baby died in mid-trimester due to NTD. Also it's expensive. Sigh. So my hubby &amp; I decided to try for another one later &amp; see how.

I thought I have recovered but yesterday when I went to church &amp; saw someone who is around 4-5 months preggie....I felt very sad suddenly &amp; broke down at home. I should be around her size if not of my D&amp;C 3 wks ago. Dear gals, do you feel the same?

 

[folic]

Hi Silk,

it is perfectly normal to feel the way you feel when you see preggies. Even till now, I feel the same way sometimes. As my baby would have been born in Dec, I find myself wincing when I see those babies that are 1-2 months old now. But it does get easier each day.

Also, I am taking folic acid and Bai Feng Wan. I think it should be ok, since folic acid is just vitamins which you can get from food sources anyway. I only take it once a month, the day after I finish my menses.I get mine from Eu Yan Sang as well. It has six small bottles in one box for about $40 and you have to take one bottle each time. Each bottle contains many small pills, much like po zai yun.

folic

 

[skyblue]

HI gals,

Jus need your advise. I was bleeding on fri so I went to KKH's A &amp; E. Was warded for observation. My 1st appt with my own gynae is actually tis wk (relative's recomendation). Now KKH's gynae has asked me to go back for a follow up (also tis wk).

So which gynae shd I go to, my own or KKH's? I'm not so sure cos was tinking KKH has info abt my case (ie bleeding) while me own gynae whom I'm going to is not aware of tis and I'll have to explain to him...

 

[ecbaby]

Hi Tiny,
I understanding how frustrating it is to see AF. But as long as you are ovulating properly, there's always chance right? so just let nature takes it's place ok. Meanwhile just enjoy couplehood as we may not able to when we eventually have kids. I've been temping since TTCing in Oct'03, I know how troublesome it is. I'm using ovulation kits and observing cervical mucus just to make sure. I think it helps. I'm starting to TTC too, so we just pray and "jia you" together ok.

Hi silk,
Thanks! I'm feeling better now. I understanding how you feel. When i see pregnant women, I felt like crying everytime as I will be abt 3 months preggie now if not for the m/c, and maybe having morning sickness, but i'm no longer preggie. I bought a precious moment hopechest with dec birthstone (the mth I lost my baby), put it flowers &amp; cards my frens sent me, temp chart when i conceive this baby and other some little things just to remember this brief and short pregnancy. It may sound silly but is a way to find hope and remembering my baby.

Hi skyblue,
You may want to go back to KKH gynae 1st to find out what actually happen. If you feel like sticking to your own gynae, you can postpone the appt and get the record from KKH gynae for him.
Hope this helps.

 

[folic]

Hi Tiny,

that was really funny.. you cried from Ubi to NUS ?

I can't cry from Ubi cos my instructor took me home.. I got pride mah! haahaha! I will always remember the day - 2nd Jan 1990. So long ago hor? Still remember I say - wat a way to start a new year!!

folic

 

[bebechic]

skyblue,
you should go back to KKH since you haven't even visited your gynae that is recommended by your relatives. KK gynaes are better when it comes to dealing with these problems because they have the best equipment.

 

[skyblue]

Hi ecbaby n bebechic,

Thks for yur advice. KKh's gynae has oredi explained wat the possible causes r. If i go back, it's jus to check that everything is fine.

I really hope all will be fine...

 

[helen of troy]

Dear friends,
Just a word of encouragement from me...

I had a miscarriage too last Feb. I had bleeding one day and the gyae checked and said that there was no more heartbeat. He also said that the baby was not growing well. My husband and I were devastated and I went for my D&amp; C the next day.

As usual, I went through 2 weeks of confinement and mourning. It did not only affect us but also our families.Following my gynae's advice, I tried again after 3 cycles. I conceived after the first try. However, there was spotting initially and I had to rest in bed for about 1 month. I also went for my jabs weekly till the end of my 1st trimester.Currently, I am in my 34th week of pregnancy and I will be due next month. I just hope that the last league will all go well for me..

The message I want to share is this. Don't give up. As my gynae says in order to gain back that confidence is to conceive again. Nobody wants to go through such a painful experience. However, my bond with my husband has strengthened and I will cherish my children more as I realised that it is such a miracle to be able to conceive and have a life growing inside of me.

Best of luck to all of you. I am sure you will be able to make it..

 

[shirubia]

Hi Helen of Troy! That's very encouraging! Will pray for you for your smooth delivery &amp; a bouncy, healthy baby.

Hi folic, thanks for the clarification on the bai feng wan. You said you take it once after your menses cleared? Just one bottle will do?

Hi ecbaby. That's a good way to remember your baby. But don't reckon my husband will like the idea. He keeps telling me to move on. Sigh.

Though I have no more baby, I still went to look at baby's stuff &amp; maternity clothes this afternoon!!!! I'm going nuts.

 

[millie]

hi tiny,

don't be disheartened yah. just got to keep on going!

as for bai feng wan, chinese believes it helps in alleviating menses discomfort and irregularity and also 'warm' (strengthen) the uterus. i eat mine everyday unless my menses is here. i bought mine fr a chinese medical shop and the bottle contains 60 capsules and i need to take 8 a day. different packaging fr eu yan seng.

dear ecbaby and silk, hope it's getting better each day for you!

dear skyblue, hope all's well with ur baby!

and dear helen of troy, thks for the encouragement! it does help to boost my morale!

and dearest linda, hv u given birth already? do share with us ur good news!

 

[millie]

dear tiny, don't be disheartened yah. just got to keep on going!

as for bai feng wan, chinese believes it helps in alleviating menses discomfort and irregularity and also 'warm' (strengthen) the uterus. i eat mine everyday unless my menses is here. i bought mine fr a chinese medical shop and the bottle contains 60 capsules and i need to take 8 a day. different packaging fr eu yan seng.

dear ecbaby and silk, hope it's getting better each day for you!

dear skyblue, hope all's well with ur baby!

and dear helen of troy, thks for the encouragement! it does help to boost my morale!

and dearest linda, hv u given birth already? do share with us ur good news!

 

[millie]

went for my post d&amp;c checkup today. all is ok.

wld like to share the results of my report with u. blood test is ok. but both my urine test and my hubby's sperm test show bacteria growth. i got to re-take my urine test and as for hubby, he has to take 2 wks of antibiotics and then do sperm testing again.

gynae says bacteria growth may be a factor for irregular foetus growth/ miscarriage. so get us to do re-test to double check.

hubby's sperm count is gd but percentage of healthy sperm slightly lesser than the normal range. it's not gd news but gynae says he's not too concern abt it. it's the bacteria growth tt he is more worried.

i didn't ask him abt the negative effects of the bacteria growth. thought wait for the 2nd testing 1st. don't want to think too much into it for now.

gynae did mention that the range of tests he did for us are treatable ones. there may be other factors not known to docs or not treatable and so, pointless to check.

did ask him abt in depth genetic testings. he doesn't see the necessity of doing it. unless we hv family members with some known genetic disorders. and most males with genetic disorders will have healthy sperms of less than 1%.

and i learnt something interesting. gd range of normal sperms in men is actually 15% and more! that's a low amt rt? the funny thing is all males got majority of abnormal sperms in them. gynae even gave me a lesson. say the only species with 90% and more normal sperms are the gorillas. i wonder if it means the gorillas will not have any miscarriage or abnormality incidence??

now i am looking forward to my AF. hopefully it comes soon. and of course, hope that the results will turn out well. even if not well, they will be problems that can be treated.

 

[folic]

Hi Millie,

that is some interesting data you got there. I think it helps to have some medical explanations for your loss. Hope the medication etc will help you both get a healthy pregnancy soon!!

Hi ecbaby, I only took one bottle a month cos I don't really like to take supplements

I know that some girls take it more oftern (like once a week). Also, Bai Feng wan is not suitable for pregnant ladies so if you are TTC, it would be best not to take it after you have ovulated, just in case u get preg during that period.

Thanks helen of troy. Stories like yours help me a lot!

folic

 

[skyblue]

Hi gals,

So far so gd in my case. Still hoping for the best...

 

[linda_thea]

Hi ecbaby
I put my first ultrasound of Ah dot (that was what I called it when I first saw it on screen) inside my memo book with my current pregnancy photos.... I thought that it would be fair enough to have memory of my first ever pregnancy no matter how short it was. I also kept along a diary of it right up to the date of d&amp;c. Each of us has a way of dealing with lost. As long as you are comfortable I guess.

Hi Millie
Nope I have not given birth as yet, but will be anytime soon...Will certainly inform you gals to share. Your findings sounds really interesting... But then again, why are gorillas reducing in population then I wonder....
Abt the bacteria growth... hmm...at least it is treatable with medication.

All should go well for you both I am sure of that!

Hi Silk,
Give yourself sometime to get over it.... Everyone take different time frame...Dun put too much pressure on yourself.

 

[tiny]

Hi Millie,
Thanks for sharing all that interesting stuff! Imagine, a few months back when we had our 1st pregnancies we had no idea what all this was about. I'm just thinking that if not for my m/c, I probably still wouldn't know much! I NEVER knew it was not that easy to get pregnant (I just kept hearing friends telling me "it was an accident"...in fact, there seemed like more 'accidents' that planned pregnancies!) Now we have learnt so much from each other. It's a good thing that the problem is treatable. Hope all clears up in your next test. By the way, any idea what exactly is being tested in your urine? (as in, guys got sperm test, what do girls go through?)

Thanks for the info on bai feng wan.think i'm too lazy to take it...esp if it's 8 capsules! I'll just stick to my folic &amp; multivits (which I already have trouble coping with!)

Linda, so excited for you. Must show us a photo of your baby ok? When's your EDD again?

Helen of Troy, I agree with u. My husband &amp; I have indeed grown closer since the m/c, and I think we are both much more prepared now if i were to get pregnant.

Wanted to ask something too. Today I had a huge blob of colourless discharge. It's the thick, not watery kind. Some cycles i do have this kind of texture, but not such a huge amount. Any idea if it's normal? I'm on CD13...thereabouts. (according the the last 2 cycles, i only ovulate after CD20). Any comments would be appreciated!

 

[shirubia]

Hi millie. Thanks for sharing. It's very informative. This is the 1st time I heard of bateria growth in urine &amp; sperm. Hope that your test will be fine.

Hi Linda. Yeah when's your EDD? So happy for you. Are you seeing Dr Kowa?

 

[bebechic]

linda...modi and soyabean...
can i ask if you gals still feel tender breast thru out the first trimester of the pregnancy?...or is it the beginning...???? as in...obvious changes la....what if it swells for a while and dun swell anymore?... i tested positive last week....but i am not feeling good about it...to be frank...put on some weight and i can feel my lower abdomin stretching and crampy. but my bust only swell for a week. then the feeling is gone...please advice. i have yet to see a gynae. dun feel like seeing one so soon.

 

[soyabean]

hi bebechic...
1st of all... congrats!

as for ur question, i feel breast tenderness until quite late... but i think the case differs for different women, so u cant reali compare.

hv a question for u: according to ur LMP, how many weeks are u now? if u are nearing 6 weeks, u shld go and see a gynae to clear ur doubts... at least get a scan done.

 

[bebechic]

soya....
its 22 Dec...but i dun feel right about it la....juz dun feel pregnant. sob. and i am stress!
by that count i should be coming 7 weeks already

 

[folic]

Hi bebechic!

Congrats!!! Why don't you go to the gyn for a checkup to put your mind at ease? I agree with soyabean, the symptoms vary and is not a good guage! Best wishes for the next 9 months!!

Hi Java, how are you? Have not heard from you for a while... hope you are ok.

Hi Tiny, I believe the urine test is mainly to see if you have bacteria. Also, sometimes, there might be blood in urine, which is an indication of kidney infeections etc.

folic