IVF/ICSI Support Group
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Dear qing,
I have a few pre-existing conditions like endometriosis and adenomyosis. Even Dr Loh is surprised I got pregnant. He wanted to play safe so he gave me MC to rest through my first trimester for baby to stabilise more. My superiors and colleagues are all really understanding towards my case as they know it is not easy for me. Am really appreciative of the break and really admire those who can still go to work during first trimester.
I have a few pre-existing conditions like endometriosis and adenomyosis. Even Dr Loh is surprised I got pregnant. He wanted to play safe so he gave me MC to rest through my first trimester for baby to stabilise more. My superiors and colleagues are all really understanding towards my case as they know it is not easy for me. Am really appreciative of the break and really admire those who can still go to work during first trimester.
Hi i1bb,
I have the following queries:
1. Indon or Filipino better?
2. If Filipino must give day off and handphone?
3. How r the costs like? Upfront and monthly.
4. If noone at my house (everyone goes to work), I'd get my hubby to bring maid and baby to his mum's place so that his mum can look after baby, then when maid is there, can she help with some basic housework like vacuum and mopping the floor and cleaning the toilets etc?
Thx in advance for all ur advice!!!
I have the following queries:
1. Indon or Filipino better?
2. If Filipino must give day off and handphone?
3. How r the costs like? Upfront and monthly.
4. If noone at my house (everyone goes to work), I'd get my hubby to bring maid and baby to his mum's place so that his mum can look after baby, then when maid is there, can she help with some basic housework like vacuum and mopping the floor and cleaning the toilets etc?
Thx in advance for all ur advice!!!
i1bb
Active Member
Hi sashamama
1. Up to individual. I prefer indo cos i find that they can cook better
2. Filipino or indo, if u do not wish to give day off, just voice out at the agency. Make it known first. N pay them extra for no off days. As for hp, u dnt need to give them. It's not a must. U can don't allow them to have HP also. But mine have HP n she pays her own pre paid card to call back Indonesia
3. Fees depend on agency and also depend on maid's loan. So I cnt help u on this. But usually agency fees for Filipino is more ex and if got experience ones are also more ex, if u get "fresh" never work before de, cheaper
4. This one u better check with agency also. Make it known to them. The law is, the domestic helper is by right only suppose to "work" at the address stated in their work permit...
1. Up to individual. I prefer indo cos i find that they can cook better
2. Filipino or indo, if u do not wish to give day off, just voice out at the agency. Make it known first. N pay them extra for no off days. As for hp, u dnt need to give them. It's not a must. U can don't allow them to have HP also. But mine have HP n she pays her own pre paid card to call back Indonesia
3. Fees depend on agency and also depend on maid's loan. So I cnt help u on this. But usually agency fees for Filipino is more ex and if got experience ones are also more ex, if u get "fresh" never work before de, cheaper
4. This one u better check with agency also. Make it known to them. The law is, the domestic helper is by right only suppose to "work" at the address stated in their work permit...
Hi i1bb,
Ya, I also heard to go to bigger agencies cos they won't wanna risk having their licence revoked or getting too many negative reviews. Will need to do more research. Is your helper Indon or Filipino? New or transfer? What are the difficulties u faced and how did u overcome them?
Ya, I also heard to go to bigger agencies cos they won't wanna risk having their licence revoked or getting too many negative reviews. Will need to do more research. Is your helper Indon or Filipino? New or transfer? What are the difficulties u faced and how did u overcome them?
i1bb
Active Member
My helper is indo and she's not new. She got experience here in SG n also in Malaysia. She's good. It all runs down to luck end of the day. They r humans too so treat them nicely however do draw a clear line between u as employer n her as an employee. Too nice n they'll just climb over yr head in no time. But of cos I'm not asking u to shout at them n b mean lah. Just b reasonable n be firm if u need to. Try not to let her go out of the Hse alone eg. Buy things or being kids downstairs etc cos they tend to mix ard with other ppl ESP fellow maids very easily n will learn bad things
i1bb
Active Member
Oh ya, try not to let her have money also. At the agency, voice out that u wld like to have a joint account with the maid so that u can bank in her pay in there. If she wants to remit money, u can help her do. If she needs money to buy personal necessities etc, u draw it out for her.. Better this way
dolly_gal
Well-Known Member
I helped my mum choose maid when sil preggy w nephew.
after 1 bad experience w Filipino maid who are more fierce than me n another round w Myanmar maid who is so young, she just want to come here look for bf.
Finally we got a filiipino trsf maid, she is very good.no off day n hp. Try not choose those from Manila, they are too smart, my agency try not to choose those from big city.
after 1 bad experience w Filipino maid who are more fierce than me n another round w Myanmar maid who is so young, she just want to come here look for bf.
Finally we got a filiipino trsf maid, she is very good.no off day n hp. Try not choose those from Manila, they are too smart, my agency try not to choose those from big city.
i1bb
Active Member
Oh ya Dollygal just reminded me.. Haha.. Try to employ those who r married with kids that r quite grown up kind. My maid is 32yrs old n her daughter is alrdy 12. Married so that they wnt have the higher tendency to fool ard here in SG ie. find bf etc. kids grown up Abit so they wnt miss their kids too much. If kids are abt 2-3 yrs old I think they will miss their kids.
All these that I've told u r just my personal views n doesn't nec means I'm right ya
All these that I've told u r just my personal views n doesn't nec means I'm right ya
dolly_gal
Well-Known Member
I m not racist but I told my mum, our neighbors maids are all mostly Indo. Dun want them chit chat n gossip when no one at home. Of cos. No matter wat nationality, maids are still maids. They still can communicate even language half half.
So far she is good to my bb nephew, sometimes a bit slow. We just close one eye.as long things are done.
Cannot expect perfect maid.so far in our family maids history, she is so fortunate to travel w my parents to getting n Thailand for holiday. My dad said her paid not high, but she is good n obedient so gives her as a treat.
So far she is good to my bb nephew, sometimes a bit slow. We just close one eye.as long things are done.
Cannot expect perfect maid.so far in our family maids history, she is so fortunate to travel w my parents to getting n Thailand for holiday. My dad said her paid not high, but she is good n obedient so gives her as a treat.
Dear Dollygal and i1bb,
Thx for the valuable advice! It really depends on luck i think... Really hope to get a good one, can't possibly be perfect... I think i'd research more now, visit agency in march, get the maid to arrive in june, cos my edd in aug. Like that ok?
Thx for the valuable advice! It really depends on luck i think... Really hope to get a good one, can't possibly be perfect... I think i'd research more now, visit agency in march, get the maid to arrive in june, cos my edd in aug. Like that ok?
dolly_gal
Well-Known Member
Hi Sasha,
My gfs told me maids who with their madam thru pregnancy, they tend to b more loving n caring to the bb. Not sure how true is tat.
But one thing for sure, states all ur rules before she comes to ur house. I rem the fierece Filipino Maid my mum had. She asked can use hp, my mum soft hearted said OK. End she got 2 hp n 3 numbers. Business bigger than my dad.do sidelines, still yaya tell my mum she intro frd here n got commission. Faint...
My gfs told me maids who with their madam thru pregnancy, they tend to b more loving n caring to the bb. Not sure how true is tat.
But one thing for sure, states all ur rules before she comes to ur house. I rem the fierece Filipino Maid my mum had. She asked can use hp, my mum soft hearted said OK. End she got 2 hp n 3 numbers. Business bigger than my dad.do sidelines, still yaya tell my mum she intro frd here n got commission. Faint...
dolly_gal
Well-Known Member
Everytime my mum got problem w maid, I got summon back to tell her off. The situation was so bad I very to ask my brother tell the maid shut up. Until at a stage it's like having a tigress staying at home. Dun know wat she will do when my mum sleep. I asked her locked her door when sleep.
It was until one day, she talks on her hp nonstop n wheeling. My dad asked her stopped n she told my parents not happy send her back lor. That's it, my dad said OK. Best part she insists which airline. My mum said nvrm sending a 'ghost' back.
From then on no more Manila maid I tell any agency we went after that.
It was until one day, she talks on her hp nonstop n wheeling. My dad asked her stopped n she told my parents not happy send her back lor. That's it, my dad said OK. Best part she insists which airline. My mum said nvrm sending a 'ghost' back.
From then on no more Manila maid I tell any agency we went after that.
Dollygal,
lol. The maid really very happening. i really dont wish to give day off and handphone. Will be good to her and hope she be good to my family too, especially baby and sasha (my dog).
I was thinking June and July can train the maid on the usual routines and establish rapport first. Then August when baby comes and confinement lady around, can teach maid how to take care of baby too, just in case at times need her help. Then september onwards she continues to focus on housework and cooking so that my mum, hubby and i have more time with baby.
lol. The maid really very happening. i really dont wish to give day off and handphone. Will be good to her and hope she be good to my family too, especially baby and sasha (my dog).
I was thinking June and July can train the maid on the usual routines and establish rapport first. Then August when baby comes and confinement lady around, can teach maid how to take care of baby too, just in case at times need her help. Then september onwards she continues to focus on housework and cooking so that my mum, hubby and i have more time with baby.
dolly_gal
Well-Known Member
My agency fees is a bit high but so far $ well spent. I intro to 2 of my closed gf. The agency lady broke record, found maid for them within 1-2 days. Experienced, work in middle east before but no off day.
Agency even call me to thank me personally intro biz to her. Too bad I dun get comms..: p
Agency even call me to thank me personally intro biz to her. Too bad I dun get comms..: p
eskimobaby
Active Member
Sashamama,
There's pros n cons to both indo n Filipino. Mine is a Filipino widow with 2 primary school going kids. I prefer Filipino cos no issue of not eating pork. She's more streetwise which means smarter n speak pretty ok English n shes taken care of young children before so when my gal falls sick she knows how to take care n how to coax her to take medicine. I know ppl are scared of Filipino cos they r more streetwise but if u have someone to monitor them at home I think is alrite. Mine came with her own hp n being a mother myself I dun think its rite of me to take away her Hp which is her only means of comm with her kids. There was once I told her quite severely for using the Hp too excessively n now she dare not do it. She'll usually use it at nite when she goes to bed or during her rest time in the afternoon when my gal is taking her nap. My mum is always there to monitor her for me. She has a day off once a month but I'm ok with it as she needs to go send money back to her family. If u dun give her day off then u gotta remit money for her. Sometimes she didn't want her day off n I'll just pay her $20 more. She's fast in her work n once a while she'll be a sloppy n I will tell her to redo it. I am quite fussy but after having a maid have to remind myself that she's human too so she will make mistakes. As long as she learn n redo n respectful I'm ok.
I think it's ok to get the maid abt a month or two before u give birth. As long as she's there to see u bring the baby back. I was like a tigress didn't let my maid touch or take care of my gal for the first 2 months. After that boh bian cos I gotta go back to work n can see she was super happy cos like I finally trust her n she felt important. She's with me for 2 yrs n just renewed another 2 yrs with me.
When I first got her, I was 8 months pregnant n I cried for 2 days cos I really dun like the idea of having another stranger around the house n it was quite stressful having to teach her my way of doing things but no choice lor if I wanna spend more time with my girl.
There's pros n cons to both indo n Filipino. Mine is a Filipino widow with 2 primary school going kids. I prefer Filipino cos no issue of not eating pork. She's more streetwise which means smarter n speak pretty ok English n shes taken care of young children before so when my gal falls sick she knows how to take care n how to coax her to take medicine. I know ppl are scared of Filipino cos they r more streetwise but if u have someone to monitor them at home I think is alrite. Mine came with her own hp n being a mother myself I dun think its rite of me to take away her Hp which is her only means of comm with her kids. There was once I told her quite severely for using the Hp too excessively n now she dare not do it. She'll usually use it at nite when she goes to bed or during her rest time in the afternoon when my gal is taking her nap. My mum is always there to monitor her for me. She has a day off once a month but I'm ok with it as she needs to go send money back to her family. If u dun give her day off then u gotta remit money for her. Sometimes she didn't want her day off n I'll just pay her $20 more. She's fast in her work n once a while she'll be a sloppy n I will tell her to redo it. I am quite fussy but after having a maid have to remind myself that she's human too so she will make mistakes. As long as she learn n redo n respectful I'm ok.
I think it's ok to get the maid abt a month or two before u give birth. As long as she's there to see u bring the baby back. I was like a tigress didn't let my maid touch or take care of my gal for the first 2 months. After that boh bian cos I gotta go back to work n can see she was super happy cos like I finally trust her n she felt important. She's with me for 2 yrs n just renewed another 2 yrs with me.
When I first got her, I was 8 months pregnant n I cried for 2 days cos I really dun like the idea of having another stranger around the house n it was quite stressful having to teach her my way of doing things but no choice lor if I wanna spend more time with my girl.
saggiegirl
New Member
it's lunchtime! Come, let's go and have a good lunch...
Dear Qing,
My spotting still on off yesterday. I know reikki, so i kept reikki myself. Plus i think sat healing session with laoshi help a lot. Today went back to work try to walk as little as possible. When come to eat also sian. Very hungry but after eating will feel very full. Don't eat rice lah eat noodles?
i1bb
Thank you! Will jia you!
My spotting still on off yesterday. I know reikki, so i kept reikki myself. Plus i think sat healing session with laoshi help a lot. Today went back to work try to walk as little as possible. When come to eat also sian. Very hungry but after eating will feel very full. Don't eat rice lah eat noodles?
i1bb
Thank you! Will jia you!
bbjourney
Active Member
Ching, Dr Loh wrote 300IU the other time. I gan giong coz I hvg sore throat n coughing, taking western n chinese meds now... dunno will affect anot? but if dont take my sore throat n cough cannot recover...
Moreover, now year end closing and hv a few projects on hand, hopefully can go smoothly...
Moreover, now year end closing and hv a few projects on hand, hopefully can go smoothly...
Babyjourney,
Of coz you need to take medicine for your sore throat & cough. Try to recover asap. Last time when I had cough when I was halfway in the cycle, Dr prescribed me cough medicine which is suitable for pregnant women. Can try manuka honey or manuka honey lozenges also.
Wish you can recover soon...
Of coz you need to take medicine for your sore throat & cough. Try to recover asap. Last time when I had cough when I was halfway in the cycle, Dr prescribed me cough medicine which is suitable for pregnant women. Can try manuka honey or manuka honey lozenges also.
Wish you can recover soon...
