Childless Not By Choice Group

Gan, saw a dr in sgh but i dun feel i have confidence in him coz he keep telling me that BT that we had taken reflects our ovarian reserve 2 yrs ago and he made alot of ridiculous assumption which made me like huh... a dr can say such things meh... Anyway SGH also out of the way for me...
 


Rostrum
Heeeee…I am glad I am of a little little help
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I understand, not to have O is definitely very sian but very soon you will k…and with proper "tiao2 yang3", I am sure your beautiful cycle will return again. And generally, the advice is to wait for 3 cycles to start another round. I believe its because drs kind of expect our cycles to take that long to regulate. The first cycle after IVF, may not o like in our case, the 2nd cycle can start to O and by the third, things are back to normal and then can start liao..

I understand, age is definitely a factor that is always bugging us. But try to comfort yourself that it is not the only deciding factor..health, nutritious, mood can all play a part. I got one friend very cute, whenever people try to hurry her to have kids, her standard tag-line is Lin Qing Xia only had her first at fourty plus..that made all the family planning policemen around her shut up ;p

Rostrum, you should can still BD even when cycle is not so regular..as long as you feel it’s the right time, just give it a try yah. Don't expect any result so you won't be stress but do it anyway for fun! Great to hear that you are planning for a short trip, I am thinking of one in May too. For me, I targeting about one week.

Gan is right, it’s a day 4 transfer for you. The egg collection day is officially day zero. The day following egg col is day one. I confirmed that with nuh nurses.



Gan,
Wah…looks like inflation has even set foot in housekeeping service. Your helper is probably quite good in her services, high demand, so can increase prices. My SIL just terminated the services of her helper as her helper always break her vases and ornaments. :p.

Gan, tell you, Dr Zou did forget about me once as I was her last patient for the night and that night, someone came to visit her. And in the end, I "shouted for help" a few times before I was "rescued". And I also heard of some patients having to tell her that they are done (their alarm went off for quite a while). I guess with such heavy patient flow, we always must be agile not to be left with needles all over..heheee
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When you said that, I smiled.
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..anyhow, I still rank Dr Zou well overall as she has a good heart.



Lyn
Who knows, you might also be the envy of some friends, look younger than your age, have a loving hubby, has a stable job. Right? You will never know. Remember that big woman patient at your clinic, she is eating sour grapes about you looking younger than your age. Life is very funny, remember the thread that "motherhood sucks" that Liz highlighted here before, the girls there are probably looking at us and envying us while we look at them and envy them….


I second you in that I have heard of very funny remarks from some dr and in my mind, I also formed a big bubble like you
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"drs can say that kind of things mah..?!"..heeheee..


I am sure you will find a dr who has yuan with you. For me, look up to Prof Wong and strangely, I don't look up to another dr that my friend looks up to. So its really personal taste.



Waiting in Hope,
Yes, fully agree, once you have done your best, just resume your normal life and leave the rest to divine forces yah..agree with Jan, 3% of millions of sperm is more than enough. If you can, buy something nice to reward yourself for seeing through such a major baby making project. You said you are reaching 30 right? Do you know you are very young…the other day, got one cute friend who is going to turn 30 asked me if I panick during my last day of 29, I told her it is like an alarm but instead of indulging in panic, I bought a nice present to mark that important milestone in a woman's life. I told myself that at 30 and the years that follow, they will be more a more beautiful. That was 4 yours ago. So I am 34, can be your elder sister. I am sure when you are as "matured" as me…you will even be stronger, braver and wiser
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Heeeheee…no lah, I don't read so much of inspiratonal stuff compared to my teenage years. Just that with every new candle added to my birthday cake, I gain more confidence and I am sure you will be even more confident than me in time to come.
 
Hi gals,
Sneak in while @ work...
Thanks for the clarification and I tink they make a mistake in the report...
They din even indicate the grading of the embroys day by day basis in the report.
Do u think this is detailed enuff? I find tt its v brief!
So mad....duno wanna ask them to make another detailed one or not?
 
And by right they shd do a D3 transfer for me bt cos D3 happens to fall on a Sunday...so they did a D4 transfer for me instead...
Duno other hospitals will do a D3 transfer for such scenario or not?
Bt which doc/nurses will wan to come back on a Sun? If they did, they are being v responsible le...
 
babygalore,
I still BD....bt not as often....
Yes, I find BD now more enjoyable since I dun tink of O or will strike or not?
Me planning to go Phuket...my frens are asking le...lolx...
Where u planning to go?
 
Rostrum,
I did my ET on my 1st cycle on Sunday at SGH. The nurses, doc and embryologist came back on tat day.it's a D3 transfer as well.Could it be a possibility they want to do D5 transfer but looking at the condition, decided to do D4 instead? You still have the report for the whole cycle. I got none. Even when after BFN, went for review the dr only tell me, everything is good, dunno y din implant. next time will give u higher dose. That is the only explanation i get.
I stick to her for the 2nd cycle yet the experience is even worse.I have a very bad response but she only increase the dosage without giving much explanation.Even till the end she told me to abort the cycle, she only says, oh, have to cancel. go home and rest. Try again next time. I was really hurt.I am really a failed experiment to her. Only when i changed to another doctor for my planned 3rd cycle and gone thru my history, i come to know even my 1st cycle it's not good. The eggs have flaw but she never told me about it and there are many other factors that caused it as well. I find i have been cheated. Trying for twice for nothing. Sigh!
It's really not easy to find a doctor that we can be comfortable and trust.
As for your ovulation, dun think too much. Just BD when u feel like it.Remember my case
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babygalore,
i feel like really want to meet u lor. let ur positivity to "gan ran " me. hahahaha. U must indeed look very young cos u have a young soul. I always feel like an old soul trapped in me. Finally my dh exercise his lazy hands to help me clean the house. but only the living room. The rest of the room still very messy. I haven't got a part time helper yet. Any suggestions or recommendation to get one?
My bleeding has stopped but now on duphaston 3 times a day and feel tired easily. Finally can see the baby shape in the last scan.I am so thrilled.

Waiting in hope, I also have ups and downs in 8 yrs of ttc. There are times where i am so obsessed with it, where i will try all kinds of suggestions or recommendations tat ppl give to me.Even on the spiritual way. I even ever quit for half a year and only concentrate on ttc by tcm, as ppl suggest i might be too stressful with my job.but yet nothing happened and at the end i am stressed with finance. hahaha.
There was times when i totally dun want anything to do with ttc, to the point i neglect my dh.totally no bd for 5-6 months or only once in 2 months. I blamed everyone for every single little mistakes.Time and dh support makes me stronger and stronger. I come to my own senses and still try my best but i will leave the divine to decide.It's ok to feel down but always remember to pull urself and continue to jia you again. OK? all the best to you
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Lyn, I can really understand ur feeling on the dr's comment as i had such an encounter before. Dun let their word influence you. keep ur spirit high. Jia you, sister
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Babyglaore, i shld have bought some time remarkable b4 i turn 30 hor but too late liao... will be 32 in may...sigh... Actually my plan was to be married at 25 and be a mummy at 28, ended up married at 26 but 31 still not mummy yet..
 
Rostrum, heard phuket is nice but never been there b4... i think u shld go, reward urself for working hard and ur soul will be recharged after a break be in short or long..
 
Sisters, how come kk do D3 and yet NUH do D4 transfer? Actually does it contribute to the successful rates? Heard blastocyst has the highest sucessful rates?
 
elle,
No....NUH has already plan to do a D4 transfer for me when they decided on my HCG date.
So they give me the impression tt they wun come back on a Sunday to do ER...
SGH is still responsible enuff to do a D3 ER for u on a Sun.
I ask for the report from NUH, not given by them and I oni got it after making a few calls to chase aft them...bt I must say they speed up the process cos another gal from NUH got her report aft 3 weeks oni..I m consider quite fast already.
Bt I was wondering y they din provide me the information on the embroys when the doc did run thru the stages of the embroys wif me day by day?
Perhaps I might give them a call one of these days.

Lyn,
Phuket is a place for u to relax....I hv been there twice...bt personally I prefer Krabi to Phuket...bt dh hv not been to Phuket yet...so tinking to go there...
Blastocyst indeed has a higher success rate...provided yr embroys can survive till D5.

I hv read from the forum and webs....most docs will perform D3 or D5 transfer....seldom ppl will hv a D4 transfer...I m the SPECIAL ONE!
 
Lyn,
I was with Dr Yu, head of IVF for SGH. After those horrible experience, i changed to Dr Yong for my planned 3rd IVF. The nurse asks me a lot when i called them saying i want to change dr. They keep saying, Dr Yu is the best. y u want to change to someone lower position? I was so fed up till i burst out then say, best or not, it all depends on the patients. For me, she's not and if I can't change dr then i will change hospital. Then they stop asking me and let me change.My 1st consultation with Dr Yong went very well. She's very caring and attentive. She spent an hour reviewing my past history and ask about my feeling after those failure. It's more like counselling session actually. Sister that I know from IVF support intro her to me. She's currently preg with twins under her. Her frens also preg with twins under her. I still went back to her when I know i conceived. She congratulates me and do the scan for me instead of sonographer. But now i have changed to private gynae as I feel it will be better for her to concentrate on ivf patients, though she consults normal case as well.If you would like to try under SGH, you can consider her.Nurses in SGH are good. Same as you I ban KKH due to bad experience.
 
lyn if i am not wrong, if u have alot of embbies can ask for D5 transfer in kkivf, the concern abt D5 wld be not all embbies can make it to D5. One sister in ivf forum ever mention D5 transfer has 50% chance of success.

Rostrum, i don't get any reports from KKIVF i knew the grade of my embbies transferred as DR Loh told me before he did the ET. I like krabi more than phuket too! Coz less commercialise.... Enjoy the snorkling trip during my krabi hols. The last i went to phuket was 8yrs ago after our ROM. Stayed at Karon beach. have u fixed the hols? I was thinking of going penang mid march but not sure if will clash with FET since dunno when menses will come.

Babygalore, i wish i have a 25% increment for my pay too!

Elle are u working now? which gynae u going to?
 
Gan,
Ya working now though actually of changing jobs cos my co din do well and most of colleagues already found new job. But I am kind of stuck lor. Dun know who's going to hire me and whether I will still be entitled to maternity leave or not. So no choice have to tahan....

At first i go to one near my office at Paragon then he keeps insisting for me to jab H1N1, saying i am very high risk, bla bla bla. Then always gives me medicine and charge me very high. Then I change to dr Adrian Woodworth. He's ok but very chop chop one. talk like machine gun. hahahaha. have to prepare list of questions and once go in, pass to him to answer. But he no choice to be chop chop cos his patients are a lot and though chop chop, I always have to wait for an hour to two, cos there's always about 30 patients in front of me. But when there's emergency, can always call him on the hp and he will pick up very soon. I call him when I have my bleeding last time and he's having operation. i go down hospital straight away and the nurse call him up and he attended to me once done with the operation.Can consider him if next time you want to switch to private gynae
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elle, i think u r entitled to maternity leave when u worked in a co for at least 180 days. don't stress urself over job since u r preggie now. I ever think of changing job too but becoz of my plans to do ivf last year, drop the idea since i am familar with my current co, it is easier for me to manage whereas if i join a new co, i will have to start afresh, know the pple, working culture etc. The cons would be i don't earn as much as my counterparts lor who has switched jobs. But i guess having a baby is worth more than monetary terms.

I used to see dr eunice chua at tmc, nice and warm lady. But if i conceived thru fet at kk, will stay there la since kk has all my records but will switch gynae becoz dr loh is just too busy. Being a first time mum, i guess i will want more attention.
 
Babygalore and Gan, wow u all get 25% pay increment? I also want... coz need more s eleven for IVF leh...

Elle, i find SGH nurses good disposition but hor.. when i was their for blood pressure check the staff nurse say she cant hear my reading... I was like huh?? Since u r pregnant now juz stay on first coz adapting to new environment can be stressful too..
 
Babygalore, u r right that there are ppl who envy like us with no children burden at the moment can go travel whenever we want... I guess human beings are like that wat we want something and yet to get it we tends to crave for it but once we get we also must always remind ourselves to treasure it coz for ppl like us a child dun come easy.. But one time for sure we will like our child/children well when we have them. As for those ppl in the thread that Liz had posted.. i felt that those ppl conceived too easily till they have forgotten to cherish the god gifts that they r blessed with..
 
Hi Rostrum
I also got the report from NUH, but, a very brief one...anyway, I had a diary to record down all my IVF cycles(the no. of follicles on which day of scan, lining...)
I still prefer CHR's nurses than SGH's nurse...I had done some blood test at SGH and request for a copy, and I had to call every few days to chase for a copy of the report. One of the nurse asked me, why I need the report? All their patients never ask for any report??? I was so fed up and I replied her, It's my record why can't I have it and NUH never questioned me on any report I requested....

Hi Babygalore
Me too, feels like meeting u...U are always so cheerful and +ve towards life...
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Hi Elle
When I had my 1st consultation w Dr Yong, she's very caing and patience to me....I like her but, I still prefer Prof Wong and his team members....

Hi Sisters
I quited my stressful job in Yr 2005 jus to have a child I call my own...Went to Thong Ji to q very early in the morning..went to Eu Yang Sang @ Paragon and Dr Zou faithfully, done all those tests, Clomid, IUI, IVF, spent all my DH's hard earn $$$ and I still childless yet...Hope This Tiger Year Will Let Our Wishes Come True....
 
Gan, oic... wow 25% is alot actually.. nowadays part time helper alsp very competitive..

Babygalore, gtg reunion dinner with in laws 2day.. sure will gana question again. Hahaha but like used to it liao..
 
Hi gals!
I may be starting my ivf cycle in march.... according to nuh, ER day is day 0 and ET is either 3 or 5 days later... the nurse told me that normally they dun freeze embryo on D3 but D5 and even D6,7 also have ... according to her, no point freezing embryo that is no good as they may not survive the thaw... and it is possible can end up with no embryo to freeze if all of them did not to D5... the embryologist is the key person where the embryo is concerned... but when i ask her again, she said we have the final decision on when to thaw... up to this point, confused liao..... and before D21, we will have to sign some consent forms and some will involve consent to embryologist like whether to use ICIS..... i guess i will take one step at a time......anyway, any cycle buddies ??
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Tigi, u using ur march menses to start BCP? As for the embroy part, i felt its juz beyond our control so juz dun be stressed up by that.. do ur best and keep an open mind..
 
gan, u fet will be shorter cycle than fresh cycle? i calc that mine will prob end in april to early may if goes smoothly...

lyn, i intend to induce menses in march after that start suprefact injections ...

quite worried abt taking so many leaves ... i dont intend to tell my supervisor... so scratching head now...
 
tigi, yes fet cycle shld be shorter although i dunno what is the time frame. For fresh takes at least 7 weeks from D1 of ut menses.

As for leave, can tell ur boss u going for minor surgery? That's what i told my director but immediate i told him the truth. I also concern abt being away fr work so frequent but tell myself, my priority is not work now. So trying to complete what i handle now and then take 2 weeks off for fet
 
gan, becos of my co transparency in the leave application system, whole world will know if i go on hospitalisation leave.... need to tell hr... i imagine colleag will ask too ... but i will exhaust all my annual leave ... plus some unpaid leave if otherwise.. ai...
 
tigi for colleague i am close to or comfortable to tell, i let them know why i MIA. The rest i just tell them went for some woman surgery... Coz my colleagues mostly are men, so normally they dun probe further.
Anyway these few mths do relax urself, my hubby and a couple of my colleagues opined that i was too stressed with work during cycling and therefore too much negative energy, thus not successful.
 
Tigi, since already decided to start ivf liao have to take HL no matter wat coz u have already come this far...

Gan, did u take the full 14 days HL?
 
lyn,gan... nuh gives 18 days hl fr ER wor... thks for your opinions... i m always the timid one... here scare there scare... ai...
 
lyn and tigi i took 18 days of HL, kkivf gave me 18 days...never been away from work for so lonG! Mine was during dec, so not so bad...coz year end alot of pple clearing leave. But for march, guess will take 14 days bah
 
noi,
I called up CHR today and requested for a more detailed report on the embroys on the day of my transfer....they briefly told me over the fone...bt I still insist to hv a more detailed one..they say it will take abt a month cos Prof was away and I say I will wait..
 
Tigi,
There are some ladies whom are wif NUH freeze their embroys on D3...Tts y I dun understand hw they derive to freeze D3 or D5...I asked Prof and he told me they will start freezing those embroys in D3 if they find tt the quality is not so good and for those good embroys they will let it reach D5, D6 then start freezing...then my question is again, seldom embroys will survive till D5 which he agrees...
 
Tigi,
My whole company also noes I m on HL due to transparency system....and I jus tel them I went for minor woman op...
 
rostrum, for what the nurse told me... it seems really up to the embryologist judgment... i doubt prof wong make the decision though he may influence ??? their logic seems to be only freeze the good quality ones.... or else rather dun freeze at all.....
 
sometimes i think it would be stupid of me to use annual leave to cover the hospitalization leave since it is an entitlement right??

but doing so, i must be prepared to answer questions about my absence from many people in the office...

any views gals??
 
tigi for me i will use the HL if given so that can save the leave. Coz when u r preggy u can use ur leave to take a break from work at times, rest nearer to birth etc
Of course to answer pple query can be very 'fan' lor. But i think minor woman op is good excuse, if pple probe further after u tell them op, just say u dun want to give too much details of the ops

To all sisters, Happy Lunar New Year! May this year bring us good health, happiness and little tigers for us!
 
Tigi, i juz tell my boss and kilo that i m gtg ivf coz they know i m trying and mainly i dun want them to talk behind coz my kilo are those who will gossip type...
 
gan, you must be someone very considerate, n meticulous.... cos i can see you planning very well ahead for pregnancy to come... as for me i am not someone far sighted, and because of this, make a lot of mistakes which i did regret later in life.... wish you xin xiang shi cheng too!!

lyn, i admire your courage... i don't have such courage not even to tell my family about doing ivf.... i think i am the first needing such treatments....

& thanks everybody, i think i have better idea of what to do now... cheers!
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Happy Lunar New Year to all Sisters & Friends!!
 
Tigi, i only tell my boss and kilo but keep very tight with family coz dun want them to give me pressure. As for kilo i told them coz i dun wish them to disturb during my HL...
 
Ladies, happy chinese new year! A baby for everyone here in this golden tiger year! Jia you all of us!!! Lets all sadness behind us and the good times shld be here soon... Cheers!!
 
Tigi,
I dun mean to affect yr views abt NUH...jus my 2 cents worth...u can voice out to Prof abt the freezing of embroys...I hv done some check via the web and most embroys best surviving environment is still in the womb...therefore seldom embroys can survive till D5...
As for HL, its really our entitlement to hv it...as long as we have an HL issued by the hospital, there is no need for us to inform them the reason...I mean its up to u...for me, I find not taking HL is a bit lugi...u might need yr ALs in future for yr own use? Or if u preggie, the ALs might come in handy...
 
Tigi,
Another idea....do u intend to inform yr company abt yr "planned" HL? If not, last min then inform them u r going for HL....can tel them u r preggy, just not so stable..so doc issue u HL...and tel yr boss oni...say u pantang, dun wish to let so many ppl noe?
Not sure whether this is a good idea...bt tis is an option....
Dun be so "fan" liao...stay relaxed till yr cycle starts!
 
I would like to wish everyone a HAPPY NEW YEAR! May tis TIGER year brings all of us a BFP soon...either BFP in Tiger Year or hv a Tiger baby! JIA YOU and GONG XI GONG XI!
 
Xin Nian Kuai Le everybody... may our wishes to have babies come true in this new year!!
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rostrum, dun worry... i won;t be affected about nuh,... maybe during cycle i am not going to go too much into the details... and not going to ask too many questions... sometimes it is more luck than ever to strike and become pregnant... it seems to be depend on destiny and whether i have yuan fen with a kiddo...
i was thinking to inform co about planned HL (if taking) a few days before so that i have less time to fend off those unwelcoming questions......
 
Tigi,
Tts good..I m so afraid to tel u soo much...
Anyway, ya....it all boils down to fate!
Ya...if the timeframe shorter...u will hv lesser questions...
Anyway even if they ask, u can kip mum and say dun wish to evaluate much cos its not a good thing aft all and shut them off...
U not going to "Bai nian"?
 
rostrum, gg later to visit parents.... also follow in laws to temple to pai pai... in laws tradition... haha...

ya, i learn to trust the medical team... afterall they know more than me right... also i accept the fact them that they r not god n they dun know everything .. like if i will strike etc...
 
Wishing everybody a fruitful Tiger year ahead and blessed with the courage and strength to face whatever that comes your way. =) may we all be able to hold our own babies in our arms soon!
 


Tigi,
Its also our tradition to go temple on 1st day of CNY..in fact, we already start going at 1am to bencoolen st le....hee...
 

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