Child Adoption
- Thread starter vmom
- Start date
mummyportia
New Member
Hi ladies,
thks for having me. Didn't realise my boy is 1 of the oldest in the thread as time has really flown us by in the busyness of enjoying and nursing my precious. Had gone to Alice last year as my first stop but only got my dd from Joyful. It was love at 1st sight n I'd never looked back since after that magical moment. Still mersmerised every day as i cuddle him to sleep. It was tough being mummy overnight esp when we had to play catch-up since my dd had been confined to a sarong at the nanny's home, so he only began to crawl steadily in the last 2 days. Gd thing he's a drinker and a fast learner, in fact he surprised me by teething around 6 mths, like Dream's dd. And now he's got about 7 teeth at 10 mths! Still waiting for the final court hearing, which will be tmr. Hope to hear from lawyer soon...
thks for having me. Didn't realise my boy is 1 of the oldest in the thread as time has really flown us by in the busyness of enjoying and nursing my precious. Had gone to Alice last year as my first stop but only got my dd from Joyful. It was love at 1st sight n I'd never looked back since after that magical moment. Still mersmerised every day as i cuddle him to sleep. It was tough being mummy overnight esp when we had to play catch-up since my dd had been confined to a sarong at the nanny's home, so he only began to crawl steadily in the last 2 days. Gd thing he's a drinker and a fast learner, in fact he surprised me by teething around 6 mths, like Dream's dd. And now he's got about 7 teeth at 10 mths! Still waiting for the final court hearing, which will be tmr. Hope to hear from lawyer soon...
Hi Dream,
I've been busy with my work, have to cover my colleague job as she's on leave for few days... so tiring... My dd is better, I think is about 90% recover but sometimes I can hear her breathing like there's still some phlegm at her throat.
Mummyportia, All the best for your hearing today.
I also have the same memorable moment when I first saw my dd, it's like love at first sight. It's really indescribable.
Iwantitvmuch,
Hearing in court for your dd today? Do we need to go for the hearing? All the best to you too....
I've been busy with my work, have to cover my colleague job as she's on leave for few days... so tiring... My dd is better, I think is about 90% recover but sometimes I can hear her breathing like there's still some phlegm at her throat.
Mummyportia, All the best for your hearing today.
I also have the same memorable moment when I first saw my dd, it's like love at first sight. It's really indescribable.
Iwantitvmuch,
Hearing in court for your dd today? Do we need to go for the hearing? All the best to you too....
Mummyportia - welcome!
Elizabeth - I think it's great you are planning to adopt a toddler!
Sweeclo - yes, I have stuff to pass to you if you want. She has outgrown that dress that you like (the one u commented on my FB, the navy blue with flowers). I send to you? PM me your address or you can come pick up if you like.
Elizabeth - I think it's great you are planning to adopt a toddler!
Sweeclo - yes, I have stuff to pass to you if you want. She has outgrown that dress that you like (the one u commented on my FB, the navy blue with flowers). I send to you? PM me your address or you can come pick up if you like.
mummyportia
New Member
dream
haha me too , wishing I can go n look at all the girls' stuff, n also take my dd to meet all u girls n your babies, but my boy is super active and sociable now, so afraid he'll wear you out with his energy (almost like an energizer rabbit!) n freak all the baby girls out.
Sweetcl05
No we don't have to go for the court hearing, the lawyer shld send u letters to update progress.
Yuli
So glad u've seen through the paperwork... u've come a long way! my hero hehe.
Iwantitvmuch
realised u have joined TAFNET. How was it? I'm contemplating joining too, do they meet up regularly?
Babylove
Is your son 10 mths old too? Can he stand up on his own?
ellebaby
Do keep us updated. It should be a divine appointment where u will know instantly if the baby is meant 4 u, u will feel tremendous peace in your heart.
haha me too , wishing I can go n look at all the girls' stuff, n also take my dd to meet all u girls n your babies, but my boy is super active and sociable now, so afraid he'll wear you out with his energy (almost like an energizer rabbit!) n freak all the baby girls out.
Sweetcl05
No we don't have to go for the court hearing, the lawyer shld send u letters to update progress.
Yuli
So glad u've seen through the paperwork... u've come a long way! my hero hehe.
Iwantitvmuch
realised u have joined TAFNET. How was it? I'm contemplating joining too, do they meet up regularly?
Babylove
Is your son 10 mths old too? Can he stand up on his own?
ellebaby
Do keep us updated. It should be a divine appointment where u will know instantly if the baby is meant 4 u, u will feel tremendous peace in your heart.
iwantitvmuch
Member
Dream, I didn't hear from Legal on the hearing. I said a short prayer and hope that everything is okay. It's the birthday of my hubby yesterday. It will be really meaningful.
Mummyportia, our court hearings were on the same day. Yesterday! I joined TAFNET but haven't got time to join them for anything but the program is quite interesting. U can PM me your email and I can send the program to you when they have talks.
Sweet, BlesswBB, aiya, I would have joined you all if I saw the postings earlier.
Mummyportia, our court hearings were on the same day. Yesterday! I joined TAFNET but haven't got time to join them for anything but the program is quite interesting. U can PM me your email and I can send the program to you when they have talks.
Sweet, BlesswBB, aiya, I would have joined you all if I saw the postings earlier.
iwantitvmuch,
Today is very eventful...i was like rushing to dream's place to pass her things and managed to have some time at her place for a chat and den rushing down to Yuli's place to collect the bb chair and let both girls spent their time together fighting for toys...phew...wat a day for me...but i'm glad to be able to catch up with dream and yuli again today.
Sweetcl got to go somewhere so went there earlier...we didn't meet up in the end.
Today is very eventful...i was like rushing to dream's place to pass her things and managed to have some time at her place for a chat and den rushing down to Yuli's place to collect the bb chair and let both girls spent their time together fighting for toys...phew...wat a day for me...but i'm glad to be able to catch up with dream and yuli again today.
Sweetcl got to go somewhere so went there earlier...we didn't meet up in the end.
babylove80
New Member
HIIII LADIESSSS!!!!
Missed posting on the forum, so since I could not sleep, I thought I'd come say hi. Welcome to the new members. Our group is ever expanding. Completed the MCYS interview on Monday, now the waiting game begins. I really want to get everything settle before bb turns 1. Also, I am planning on going part-time (i.e 3 day work week). Got the OK from Director, now just need to finalise a few minor details. I would probably start next month.
Mummyportia,
I read your posts, and I can relate to the sarong bit. During the 4 months that my bb was in Malaysia, he was always put into the sarong cradle to sleep. He could sleep long hours as they had the motor to rock the cradle.But as soon as we stop the rocking, he would wake up. And whenever I tried to pass the nanny someting for him to play with, she would just put it in the drawer as she felt that he as getting enough stimulation. Every week I prayed for him to come back to us, so that we can look after him, and finally after the TOUCH interview, we brought him home. We never used the cloth cradle again! That was when he turned 7 months. He only really started commando crawling 2-3 weeks ago. He has not tried to stand up as yet. I have enrolled him in Gymboree to encourage his development. And I think when he saw the other bubs crawling, it must have clicked or something
.
Elle,
I realise that you haven't been with us as often as before. When i read your post, I was not even judging you. I could understand how you were feeling. I hope you are feeling better. If it makes any sense, seeing a baby does not mean that you will choose him/her. If we don't choose him/her, there will be another adoptive parents who will choose him/her. I don't know if I shared with you this before. When I went over to JB with my agent, there was my bb and a bb girl.My hubby wanted the lil girl, but when I held her, I felt something was not quite right. I was unsure, but at the same time I was telling myself that I should not be picky or choosy. But when I held my bb, I was still unsure, but I felt more in love with him. Although agent gave us 1 week to decide, we took the time to think, and even went back to see both babies. Finally we decided on our bb. But my guilt for not choosing the lil girl knawed at me, till I heard that someone had adopted her.
When we brought him back to Singapore, he was 3 weeks 2 weeks old and was below the 50th percentile for weight and head circumference. Currently, he is within the 50th-75th percentile. I think we just need to take the leap of faith when it feels right. With our love, care and influence, we can nuture them to the best of their potential. Do let us know the good news when ur ready.
Yuli,
I started to laugh when I read your post about how you let ur bb cry while asked ur family members if it was her tooth coming out. That's a moment, ingrained in your heart forever
.
Missed posting on the forum, so since I could not sleep, I thought I'd come say hi. Welcome to the new members. Our group is ever expanding. Completed the MCYS interview on Monday, now the waiting game begins. I really want to get everything settle before bb turns 1. Also, I am planning on going part-time (i.e 3 day work week). Got the OK from Director, now just need to finalise a few minor details. I would probably start next month.
Mummyportia,
I read your posts, and I can relate to the sarong bit. During the 4 months that my bb was in Malaysia, he was always put into the sarong cradle to sleep. He could sleep long hours as they had the motor to rock the cradle.But as soon as we stop the rocking, he would wake up. And whenever I tried to pass the nanny someting for him to play with, she would just put it in the drawer as she felt that he as getting enough stimulation. Every week I prayed for him to come back to us, so that we can look after him, and finally after the TOUCH interview, we brought him home. We never used the cloth cradle again! That was when he turned 7 months. He only really started commando crawling 2-3 weeks ago. He has not tried to stand up as yet. I have enrolled him in Gymboree to encourage his development. And I think when he saw the other bubs crawling, it must have clicked or something
Elle,
I realise that you haven't been with us as often as before. When i read your post, I was not even judging you. I could understand how you were feeling. I hope you are feeling better. If it makes any sense, seeing a baby does not mean that you will choose him/her. If we don't choose him/her, there will be another adoptive parents who will choose him/her. I don't know if I shared with you this before. When I went over to JB with my agent, there was my bb and a bb girl.My hubby wanted the lil girl, but when I held her, I felt something was not quite right. I was unsure, but at the same time I was telling myself that I should not be picky or choosy. But when I held my bb, I was still unsure, but I felt more in love with him. Although agent gave us 1 week to decide, we took the time to think, and even went back to see both babies. Finally we decided on our bb. But my guilt for not choosing the lil girl knawed at me, till I heard that someone had adopted her.
When we brought him back to Singapore, he was 3 weeks 2 weeks old and was below the 50th percentile for weight and head circumference. Currently, he is within the 50th-75th percentile. I think we just need to take the leap of faith when it feels right. With our love, care and influence, we can nuture them to the best of their potential. Do let us know the good news when ur ready.
Yuli,
I started to laugh when I read your post about how you let ur bb cry while asked ur family members if it was her tooth coming out. That's a moment, ingrained in your heart forever
mummyportia
New Member
Dream
Thought I posted yesterday about the recipes I had started my boy on but it seemed to have disappeared ...so in short, here's a summed up version :- boring but helpful so far. Had followed my family dr's adv, when my boy developed lots of phlegm 2 mths ago n had probs clearing it, to follow an infant's dietary chart to build immunity n avoid potential food allergies ie, to start with Stage 1: plain congee for a week once my boy started solids, n alternate it with congee + pureed carrot, or pumpkin, sweet potato, minced pork, apple, asparagus. Eg day 1 : plain congee, Day 2 congee w carrot, Day 3 plain congee, Day 4 congee w apple, etc. No processed food, additives, fish, wheat products or nuts until much later which will be stage 2.
babylove80
Yay... so happy 4 u to have come thru this faith-based journey!! Funny but I can identify with u on every count, like how my boy is playing catch up himself, when he sees other bubs crawling or walking in the church nursery. So even tho I had originally thought of checking out Gymboree, I've decided to put it on hold as my boy is showing speedy progress, esp in the last mth. Just remembered how when I 1st brought him home, his repressed self seemed to pop up instantly when he tried to lift himself up and down the window grilles every morning on waking up! Now at 10 mths, he's eager to stand up by supporting himself with any person, chair or table around. I'm focusing on getting him to practise his walk daily. The PT work will certainly help. Like I'm currently on a 4-day work week that allows me to spend more full days with him. It's amazing but like what my dr said, once babies hit 9 mths old, they will be more cognizant of who their parents n caregivers are, and will show their clear preference for the one who spends longer time with him or her. I also had the exact experience of guilt on having to choose bet my son n another bb girl. Until now, I still wonder how the other girl is faring even tho I knew she had been adopted.
Iwantitvmuch
Thx so much. My email is [email protected]. Don't worry, the legal stuff is in good hands, the MCYS social wker told us that most of it is for formality only. My lawyer even cc'd us a letter from MCYS after they came for a final home visit that indicated their high recommendation. I'm excited 4 u n can't wait to celeb like Yuli keke. Funny how most of u girls have links to a banking career, my husb is in the same line too
Thought I posted yesterday about the recipes I had started my boy on but it seemed to have disappeared ...so in short, here's a summed up version :- boring but helpful so far. Had followed my family dr's adv, when my boy developed lots of phlegm 2 mths ago n had probs clearing it, to follow an infant's dietary chart to build immunity n avoid potential food allergies ie, to start with Stage 1: plain congee for a week once my boy started solids, n alternate it with congee + pureed carrot, or pumpkin, sweet potato, minced pork, apple, asparagus. Eg day 1 : plain congee, Day 2 congee w carrot, Day 3 plain congee, Day 4 congee w apple, etc. No processed food, additives, fish, wheat products or nuts until much later which will be stage 2.
babylove80
Yay... so happy 4 u to have come thru this faith-based journey!! Funny but I can identify with u on every count, like how my boy is playing catch up himself, when he sees other bubs crawling or walking in the church nursery. So even tho I had originally thought of checking out Gymboree, I've decided to put it on hold as my boy is showing speedy progress, esp in the last mth. Just remembered how when I 1st brought him home, his repressed self seemed to pop up instantly when he tried to lift himself up and down the window grilles every morning on waking up! Now at 10 mths, he's eager to stand up by supporting himself with any person, chair or table around. I'm focusing on getting him to practise his walk daily. The PT work will certainly help. Like I'm currently on a 4-day work week that allows me to spend more full days with him. It's amazing but like what my dr said, once babies hit 9 mths old, they will be more cognizant of who their parents n caregivers are, and will show their clear preference for the one who spends longer time with him or her. I also had the exact experience of guilt on having to choose bet my son n another bb girl. Until now, I still wonder how the other girl is faring even tho I knew she had been adopted.
Iwantitvmuch
Thx so much. My email is [email protected]. Don't worry, the legal stuff is in good hands, the MCYS social wker told us that most of it is for formality only. My lawyer even cc'd us a letter from MCYS after they came for a final home visit that indicated their high recommendation. I'm excited 4 u n can't wait to celeb like Yuli keke. Funny how most of u girls have links to a banking career, my husb is in the same line too
Mummyportia
thanks for sharing the meal plan for stage 1. Somehow I can't recall how I did it for my elder daughter! The only think I remember us that she turned orange as we gave her too many baby jars which contained carrots! Is your boy' s phlegm better? Does it make him cough? Did the doctor have to suck the phlegm?
Otherwise, seems like you and babylove have lots of things in common.
thanks for sharing the meal plan for stage 1. Somehow I can't recall how I did it for my elder daughter! The only think I remember us that she turned orange as we gave her too many baby jars which contained carrots! Is your boy' s phlegm better? Does it make him cough? Did the doctor have to suck the phlegm?
Otherwise, seems like you and babylove have lots of things in common.
welcome mummyportia ! welcome back elizabeth ! eating my lunch and reading this forum now.
babylove, miss me right
on your working part-time, so happy for your decision babylove. You have a good company and director to allow you to go part-time. You will be able to spend more time with bb. My work does not allow me to work part-time so I am doing my best to clear as much for a logical stop.
i m feeling better now. The little girl has been adopted so I felt also better. I do feel restless as the wait sometimes drive me nuts ! I am glad work (alots) is keeping me very occupied so I do not think nosense. Sigh but the work is drowing me. thx for sharing your stories babylove, mummyportia.
blessbb n sweetcl, I have contacted Alice so she know I am still waiting. I hope to share good news to all soon. Keeping fingers and toes cross and praying I will bring my little girl home soon.
iwantivmuch and mummyportia - how's the court hearing ? it is awesome to know process will be over soon. Keep us updated.
sweetcl, how are you doing ? hope bb is better now.
haha, iwantivmuch, ur malay bagus arh ! it's ok lah so when my bb comes, I will welcome from anyone who has anything usable to pass my bb
k, back to my work now. hugs to all.
babylove, miss me right
i m feeling better now. The little girl has been adopted so I felt also better. I do feel restless as the wait sometimes drive me nuts ! I am glad work (alots) is keeping me very occupied so I do not think nosense. Sigh but the work is drowing me. thx for sharing your stories babylove, mummyportia.
blessbb n sweetcl, I have contacted Alice so she know I am still waiting. I hope to share good news to all soon. Keeping fingers and toes cross and praying I will bring my little girl home soon.
iwantivmuch and mummyportia - how's the court hearing ? it is awesome to know process will be over soon. Keep us updated.
sweetcl, how are you doing ? hope bb is better now.
haha, iwantivmuch, ur malay bagus arh ! it's ok lah so when my bb comes, I will welcome from anyone who has anything usable to pass my bb
k, back to my work now. hugs to all.
Hi ladies
Its been a long long time. I've been up to my neck with work that's why I've not been able to log on.
I'm officially on the waiting list for a baby and it has been 3 weeks but still no news. Compared to earlier on when I had the major jitters, this time I just can't wait to hold a baby in my arms!
For those who are waiting to adopt or waiting to adopt a second one, someone in TAFNET adopted two babies from Project Cherub. This is a local organisation. I'm thinking of giving them a call as well.If you are interested, I'll give you the number.
Yuli
Thanks so much for offering me some of your baby things. But I really don't know when my baby is going to arrive and whether it's going to be a boy or girl. You are really very kind!
Babylove
I liked your message to Elle. Somebody in TAFNET mentioned that we have to be prepared for hits and misses and not feel guilty about it. It's all about chemistry.Hooray that you're going part-time! Now you will have more time for your baby!
BlessBB, Elizabeth
It's great that you're waiting to adopt a second one.
Dream
Wow!I can't believe that your baby is already 6 months! Time really flies!
Ivantitvmuch
Hello to you too! I'm following closely your tips on high chairs. Will be useful when my turn comes.
Mummyportia
A warm welcome to you!
Its been a long long time. I've been up to my neck with work that's why I've not been able to log on.
I'm officially on the waiting list for a baby and it has been 3 weeks but still no news. Compared to earlier on when I had the major jitters, this time I just can't wait to hold a baby in my arms!
For those who are waiting to adopt or waiting to adopt a second one, someone in TAFNET adopted two babies from Project Cherub. This is a local organisation. I'm thinking of giving them a call as well.If you are interested, I'll give you the number.
Yuli
Thanks so much for offering me some of your baby things. But I really don't know when my baby is going to arrive and whether it's going to be a boy or girl. You are really very kind!
Babylove
I liked your message to Elle. Somebody in TAFNET mentioned that we have to be prepared for hits and misses and not feel guilty about it. It's all about chemistry.Hooray that you're going part-time! Now you will have more time for your baby!
BlessBB, Elizabeth
It's great that you're waiting to adopt a second one.
Dream
Wow!I can't believe that your baby is already 6 months! Time really flies!
Ivantitvmuch
Hello to you too! I'm following closely your tips on high chairs. Will be useful when my turn comes.
Mummyportia
A warm welcome to you!
iwantitvmuch
Member
babylove, I'm so happy that you can go part time!!!
hi all,
i have some question to ask about the legal fee for adoption.
My friend is a single mum but recently she just got married (not with the child natural father). This child is less then 1 year old.
They wanted to change the child surname to her husband and also the birth cert to insert her husband name.
For the lawyer what are the kind of things they charges?
Stamp fee
MCYS
and what desperment(sorry i spell wrongly but it's something like this. What is this thing)
i have some question to ask about the legal fee for adoption.
My friend is a single mum but recently she just got married (not with the child natural father). This child is less then 1 year old.
They wanted to change the child surname to her husband and also the birth cert to insert her husband name.
For the lawyer what are the kind of things they charges?
Stamp fee
MCYS
and what desperment(sorry i spell wrongly but it's something like this. What is this thing)
Saw the post title and find it so interesting... Reminds me of the old times...
The first baby that my mother helped to bring in for adoption was nearly 15 years ago.... Now looking back, all the children have grown up.
But the sad thing is that most of the adoptive parents do not like to keep in contact with us. Probably because they are afraid that the child will know the truth.
Do you ladies think that it is okay for the child to know?
The first baby that my mother helped to bring in for adoption was nearly 15 years ago.... Now looking back, all the children have grown up.
But the sad thing is that most of the adoptive parents do not like to keep in contact with us. Probably because they are afraid that the child will know the truth.
Do you ladies think that it is okay for the child to know?
iwantitvmuch
Member
Hi Dodo, I don't have information about this. If u r keen to know, I can help you to find out from my lawyer legal assistant.
Hapimint, we are encouraged to reveal the truth to our child. Is your mom still in this line?? We are very close to the agent whom we received our babies from.
Hapimint, we are encouraged to reveal the truth to our child. Is your mom still in this line?? We are very close to the agent whom we received our babies from.
Hi Hapimint,
Welcome!
As for me I don't mind telling the truth to my dd cos sooner or later the child will know the truth. It's better to let the child know earlier than later cos it's like building up bricks and when the child got older, when he/she found out by him/herself it's like a big blast hitting onto her.... it's a big impact.
I find it's very helpful that you can go to Touch disclosure talk to hear more about the experience of the adoptive parents, how they disclosed to their child/children. Some of their experience very interesting.
I'm quite happy that we've a groupies that all mummies and mum-to-be encourage each others and shares the joy, sorrow and experience in taking care of our babies. And I greatly appreciate the ladies out there (esp. to babylove, blesswbb, Yuli, Iwantitvmuch, dream, elle, janella)
Times really flies very fast... The first time when I started reading this thread, it's encourage me a lot. Initially, I've lots of doubts, I'm afraid that others peoples views. But after reading experiences from the ladies I decided to go ahead to my plan. Now, I'm a happy mum, the moment when I first saw my dd, she's so tiny and her smile melts me and DH's hearts. Now, she's 3mth+
Actually I intends to disclose to her when she's 7/8mths... haha... am I a "kaisu" mum. I intend to tell her in cartoon stories way, etc How Tarzan being adopted...
** Sorry I've wrote alot!!
Welcome!
As for me I don't mind telling the truth to my dd cos sooner or later the child will know the truth. It's better to let the child know earlier than later cos it's like building up bricks and when the child got older, when he/she found out by him/herself it's like a big blast hitting onto her.... it's a big impact.
I find it's very helpful that you can go to Touch disclosure talk to hear more about the experience of the adoptive parents, how they disclosed to their child/children. Some of their experience very interesting.
I'm quite happy that we've a groupies that all mummies and mum-to-be encourage each others and shares the joy, sorrow and experience in taking care of our babies. And I greatly appreciate the ladies out there (esp. to babylove, blesswbb, Yuli, Iwantitvmuch, dream, elle, janella)
Times really flies very fast... The first time when I started reading this thread, it's encourage me a lot. Initially, I've lots of doubts, I'm afraid that others peoples views. But after reading experiences from the ladies I decided to go ahead to my plan. Now, I'm a happy mum, the moment when I first saw my dd, she's so tiny and her smile melts me and DH's hearts. Now, she's 3mth+
Actually I intends to disclose to her when she's 7/8mths... haha... am I a "kaisu" mum. I intend to tell her in cartoon stories way, etc How Tarzan being adopted...
** Sorry I've wrote alot!!
Babylove,
So happy for you, you can have more times with your dd... You got a good boss! Don't thing my boss allows me to work part-time.
Elle,
I'm fine,Thanks. Only abit tired cos my company don't allow me to take in a go for a month adoption leave, I only can take 2 days in a week. Initially was really very tiring but now abit used to it. Luckily, she woke up 2x... recently she woke up once. She slept for 10hrs past 2 days and yest 9hrs... Think she knows that mummy and daddy are tired... haha...
My dd has recovered but she's going for her 2nd jab soon. Poor girl, suffer again...
Hope to hear good news from you! I've reserved some of my dd's stuff for you too
Yuli,
Thanks for your stuff. Greatly appreciate!
Janella, Hope to hear good news from you too!
So happy for you, you can have more times with your dd... You got a good boss! Don't thing my boss allows me to work part-time.
Elle,
I'm fine,Thanks. Only abit tired cos my company don't allow me to take in a go for a month adoption leave, I only can take 2 days in a week. Initially was really very tiring but now abit used to it. Luckily, she woke up 2x... recently she woke up once. She slept for 10hrs past 2 days and yest 9hrs... Think she knows that mummy and daddy are tired... haha...
My dd has recovered but she's going for her 2nd jab soon. Poor girl, suffer again...
Hope to hear good news from you! I've reserved some of my dd's stuff for you too
Yuli,
Thanks for your stuff. Greatly appreciate!
Janella, Hope to hear good news from you too!
mummyportia
New Member
SWEETCL05
U r so right about the Touch disclosure workshop. I found it v inspiring n informative, which spurred me on to buy the disclosure story bks n call up the agencies ...can't wait to read the bks to my son. But u really made me laugh about Tarzan's adoption...haha, I forgot ... was he adopted by a monkey? Thought of how I tried to tell stories to my son when he turned 8 mths but he wasn't v keen leh, only wanted to expt opening n closing the books n ripping off the pgs!!
Yuli, Blesswbb, iwantitvmuch, dream, elle n janella
Thx 4 keeping me in the loop, it means a lot to me, as I had gone thru the whole works - countless gyns, failed IVF's, depression, chinese sinseh, questioning, n I'm turning 38... Was spending my free time reading thru the archives for this thread, and fitting in the jigsaw about how each of u have come this way. I discovered how I could have saved so much time n been encouraged if I had known of this thread earlier, rather than searching and plodding my way through in uncertainty as I started my adoption journey - HSR, registering with Project Cherub, TP family svc, the various agencies etc. Anyway, looking at my son tdy juz made me smile for the chance to be a mum
Blesswbb
Spend last nite crying both tears of sadness n joy on reading your blog ...m so tickled by all yr baby videos, u r such a funny mum, mavis is juz so lucky!!
Dream
My boy still has intermittent phlegm, but I've decided 2 go natural n let him heal on his own, by bringing him out into the sun, making him sleep without a/c, sticking to vitamins n warm water, instead of going 4 a 3rd round of medication. Gd thing he didn't have to his phlegm sucked out. Can't wait 2 see yr boy someday!!
U r so right about the Touch disclosure workshop. I found it v inspiring n informative, which spurred me on to buy the disclosure story bks n call up the agencies ...can't wait to read the bks to my son. But u really made me laugh about Tarzan's adoption...haha, I forgot ... was he adopted by a monkey? Thought of how I tried to tell stories to my son when he turned 8 mths but he wasn't v keen leh, only wanted to expt opening n closing the books n ripping off the pgs!!
Yuli, Blesswbb, iwantitvmuch, dream, elle n janella
Thx 4 keeping me in the loop, it means a lot to me, as I had gone thru the whole works - countless gyns, failed IVF's, depression, chinese sinseh, questioning, n I'm turning 38... Was spending my free time reading thru the archives for this thread, and fitting in the jigsaw about how each of u have come this way. I discovered how I could have saved so much time n been encouraged if I had known of this thread earlier, rather than searching and plodding my way through in uncertainty as I started my adoption journey - HSR, registering with Project Cherub, TP family svc, the various agencies etc. Anyway, looking at my son tdy juz made me smile for the chance to be a mum
Blesswbb
Spend last nite crying both tears of sadness n joy on reading your blog ...m so tickled by all yr baby videos, u r such a funny mum, mavis is juz so lucky!!
Dream
My boy still has intermittent phlegm, but I've decided 2 go natural n let him heal on his own, by bringing him out into the sun, making him sleep without a/c, sticking to vitamins n warm water, instead of going 4 a 3rd round of medication. Gd thing he didn't have to his phlegm sucked out. Can't wait 2 see yr boy someday!!
Hello Hapimint
As SweetCL05,iwantitvmuch and Mummyportia have mentioned, it is important to disclose early to the child.
Only after attending the disclosure workshop, did I realise how important it is.I plan to tell the child the moment he arrives, starting off with bedtime stories about his birth.
Mummyportia
I'm glad you found this forum.It is never too late. I find this forum very helpful as well. Right now, I've difficulty keeping up with all the tips you ladies share about your babies since I don't have a baby myself yet.
But I intend to pour through all the information again once baby arrives.
Elle
Looks like we are both in this waiting game.
SweetCL05
I definitely hope to give you all some good news soon.
As SweetCL05,iwantitvmuch and Mummyportia have mentioned, it is important to disclose early to the child.
Only after attending the disclosure workshop, did I realise how important it is.I plan to tell the child the moment he arrives, starting off with bedtime stories about his birth.
Mummyportia
I'm glad you found this forum.It is never too late. I find this forum very helpful as well. Right now, I've difficulty keeping up with all the tips you ladies share about your babies since I don't have a baby myself yet.
But I intend to pour through all the information again once baby arrives.
Elle
Looks like we are both in this waiting game.
SweetCL05
I definitely hope to give you all some good news soon.
mummyportia
New Member
Hi ladies
Can i join yr FB group? I've created a gmail a/c just for this purpose n wld like to keep some of our sharing pte.
Can i join yr FB group? I've created a gmail a/c just for this purpose n wld like to keep some of our sharing pte.
Hi Ladies,
Recently my dd drinking milk bad habit comes back again. sigh! Sometimes, she drink halfway or when almost finish, she'll twist and turn and don't want to drink. I'm not sure it's the colic come back again? Can we always give her the colic medicine? It's good for her??
I was quite angry with my MIL, after my dd finished her milk, she hit on her stomach!!! saying she wants to check whether she got "WIND". It's not the way to do so right??!!! My dd just finished drinking her milk, how can she do so? she shld have do so before drinking milk.
And I also found that she reduce the water when milking milk for my dd... instead of giving her 4oz water + 2 scoops of milk powder, she go and give her less water + 2 scoops of milk powder... OMG! I don't knw how to do...
Old ppl very sensitive, when I give comments, she will said I'm picky in this and that... I'm really very lost, I'm so worried with my dd
Recently my dd drinking milk bad habit comes back again. sigh! Sometimes, she drink halfway or when almost finish, she'll twist and turn and don't want to drink. I'm not sure it's the colic come back again? Can we always give her the colic medicine? It's good for her??
I was quite angry with my MIL, after my dd finished her milk, she hit on her stomach!!! saying she wants to check whether she got "WIND". It's not the way to do so right??!!! My dd just finished drinking her milk, how can she do so? she shld have do so before drinking milk.
And I also found that she reduce the water when milking milk for my dd... instead of giving her 4oz water + 2 scoops of milk powder, she go and give her less water + 2 scoops of milk powder... OMG! I don't knw how to do...
Old ppl very sensitive, when I give comments, she will said I'm picky in this and that... I'm really very lost, I'm so worried with my dd
mummyportia
New Member
SWEETCL05
In my opinion, don't worry too much about baby not wanting to drink halfway, unless she cries persistently n keeps pushing away the bottle. My boy has been doing that occasionally, but I would play by ear, sometimes discovering he's got wind as he would burp moments later on his own now or aft I've burped him when he was much younger, then he wld b willing to drink again. Sometimes, it could be that he's really full or have some phlegm or at times he just wants to play. Either way, I wld coax him with TV or by telling him fanciful stories with lotsa dramatic sound effects while making him finish the balance.
For yr MIL, hv u checked if it's becos she's forgotten the proportions or just misreads the bottle levels? Becos my helper still does this n cites these reasons. I can only do so much, n found it pointless to confront her all the time, so I'll just add hot water to the milk whenever I happen to b there, or feed my boy warm water as far as I can, to counter the heatiness of milk.
In my opinion, don't worry too much about baby not wanting to drink halfway, unless she cries persistently n keeps pushing away the bottle. My boy has been doing that occasionally, but I would play by ear, sometimes discovering he's got wind as he would burp moments later on his own now or aft I've burped him when he was much younger, then he wld b willing to drink again. Sometimes, it could be that he's really full or have some phlegm or at times he just wants to play. Either way, I wld coax him with TV or by telling him fanciful stories with lotsa dramatic sound effects while making him finish the balance.
For yr MIL, hv u checked if it's becos she's forgotten the proportions or just misreads the bottle levels? Becos my helper still does this n cites these reasons. I can only do so much, n found it pointless to confront her all the time, so I'll just add hot water to the milk whenever I happen to b there, or feed my boy warm water as far as I can, to counter the heatiness of milk.
Mummyportia,
Thanks for your advice. Ok, I'll try to add warm water (if MIL make milk when I'm around)/feed her extra water when I came back from work.
As for my MIL, I guessed that's old generation style, they don't like younger generation to teach them cos they find that they've been taking care so many kids. Yes, I agreed pointless to confront cos end up misunderstanding occurs.
Thanks for your advice. Ok, I'll try to add warm water (if MIL make milk when I'm around)/feed her extra water when I came back from work.
As for my MIL, I guessed that's old generation style, they don't like younger generation to teach them cos they find that they've been taking care so many kids. Yes, I agreed pointless to confront cos end up misunderstanding occurs.
iwantitvmuch
Member
SweetCL05, I give 4oz of water with 4 scoops of milk powder leh. is bb constipated and that's why you give only 2 scoops.
Did bb just had her injection? My bb will twist and turn when she has no appetite. No need to give colic medicine. Try the transparent liquid(aiya, i forgotten what that's call). Someone help me.
Mummyportia, sure, we will add you. FB group is very private b'cos we are using our real accounts. We have known each other for a while. So, you will know us very soon! I'll send an email to your address you listed above when we are all ready. Hope you don't mind. Rehdeer was our latest addition. Speaking of that, where has she been??
Did bb just had her injection? My bb will twist and turn when she has no appetite. No need to give colic medicine. Try the transparent liquid(aiya, i forgotten what that's call). Someone help me.
Mummyportia, sure, we will add you. FB group is very private b'cos we are using our real accounts. We have known each other for a while. So, you will know us very soon! I'll send an email to your address you listed above when we are all ready. Hope you don't mind. Rehdeer was our latest addition. Speaking of that, where has she been??
Janella,
great to hear from you and read that you are now ready to the next big step! I am so excited for you and now that you are ready, one day feels like an eternity. But I guess the wait will make the day more memorable!
Sweetcl
I know how you feel. It is always worrisome when our little ones don't want to drink as we do not know the reasons. I guess they have their days too but most important is that she is growing well. Try to keep track of the amount of milk she drinks a day. It may be more than what you think.
I also feel that my boy is on milk strike! I guess he wants to eat more solid food!
Iwantitvmuch
how much milk is your daughter drinking now? Has she reduced her milk intake?
Mummyportia
agree it is better to avoid medicine and as they build up their immunity, they would fall sick less often.
Yuli and blesswbb
how are you? Thread quiet without you too!
great to hear from you and read that you are now ready to the next big step! I am so excited for you and now that you are ready, one day feels like an eternity. But I guess the wait will make the day more memorable!
Sweetcl
I know how you feel. It is always worrisome when our little ones don't want to drink as we do not know the reasons. I guess they have their days too but most important is that she is growing well. Try to keep track of the amount of milk she drinks a day. It may be more than what you think.
I also feel that my boy is on milk strike! I guess he wants to eat more solid food!
Iwantitvmuch
how much milk is your daughter drinking now? Has she reduced her milk intake?
Mummyportia
agree it is better to avoid medicine and as they build up their immunity, they would fall sick less often.
Yuli and blesswbb
how are you? Thread quiet without you too!
mummyportia
New Member
iwantitvmuch
no worries. I understand perfectly. In fact it makes me more secure knowing it's a private group. Thks for checking with them.
no worries. I understand perfectly. In fact it makes me more secure knowing it's a private group. Thks for checking with them.
dream,
Been reading the thread but just can't find time to reply. My mum just came back from a short trip...without her my time has been tied down by my girl.
Sweetcl05,
Don worry abt yr girl intake of milk...i've gone thru that for 8mths...my girl is back with her nonsense again. Now the only thing u can hope is wait till she is ready for solid if not headache...headache. I think my girl will eventually give up on milk once she turn 1.
Do u think u can talk to your MIL that nowadays milk are much different from the time she take care of bb? Or u can tell her that yr girl has lactose intolerance so too much milk powder will make her bloated and rejecting milk. Actually, i can understand how u feel..i also has this problem with my Bro-in-law..I'm so afraid to bring my girl to his place...he will start giving all kinds of food to my girl...had tried telling him not to as she will be too young but he keeps saying can as his daughters are all grown up in this way.
iwantitvmuch,
Think since Mummyportia is active in this thread maybe can consider adding her in. U may wan to check with Babylove 1st.
Been reading the thread but just can't find time to reply. My mum just came back from a short trip...without her my time has been tied down by my girl.
Sweetcl05,
Don worry abt yr girl intake of milk...i've gone thru that for 8mths...my girl is back with her nonsense again. Now the only thing u can hope is wait till she is ready for solid if not headache...headache. I think my girl will eventually give up on milk once she turn 1.
Do u think u can talk to your MIL that nowadays milk are much different from the time she take care of bb? Or u can tell her that yr girl has lactose intolerance so too much milk powder will make her bloated and rejecting milk. Actually, i can understand how u feel..i also has this problem with my Bro-in-law..I'm so afraid to bring my girl to his place...he will start giving all kinds of food to my girl...had tried telling him not to as she will be too young but he keeps saying can as his daughters are all grown up in this way.
iwantitvmuch,
Think since Mummyportia is active in this thread maybe can consider adding her in. U may wan to check with Babylove 1st.
babylove80
New Member
I just typed a long long reply to sweetclo, but it got lost in space. Let me retype it again
. Maybe this time I won't be long-winded
.
Sweetclo,
I can 100% emphatise with you. It is a tricky situation, because times have changed since our mothers and inlaws. I guess you will have to be at their level. What I did was to let my hubby take care of communications to his mother, and I my mother. Sometimes MIL does not like DIL to tell them. So better to get ur hubby to take on some of the 'battles'.
Hitting the tummy is a definite no-no. I am sure that ur hubby would not like you hitting his tummy after a full meal right. If anything, it should be after an hour or so.
Re ratio of infant formula to water, I think MIL might not be able to read markings on the bottle. My mum and nanny was also making mistakes with the quantity of water and infant formula. So what i did was to mark the water level. That helped to some extent. Otherwise, just give ur bb extra serves of water.
re quantity, hereis the link I shared in the earlier posts. http://www.babycenter.com/0_how-to-tell-how-much-formula-your-baby-needs_9136.bc. I guess it's more how much your baby can drink in 24hrs, not at one go. My bb,at 9 months, only drinks 5-6 ounces at one go. I used to force him to drink more, but after reading this article, it really took the pressure off me, and I was able to focus on the bigger pic which was to ensure that he meets his daily. Find the timings where bb drinks more, and see if you can push.
Sweetclo,
I can 100% emphatise with you. It is a tricky situation, because times have changed since our mothers and inlaws. I guess you will have to be at their level. What I did was to let my hubby take care of communications to his mother, and I my mother. Sometimes MIL does not like DIL to tell them. So better to get ur hubby to take on some of the 'battles'.
Hitting the tummy is a definite no-no. I am sure that ur hubby would not like you hitting his tummy after a full meal right. If anything, it should be after an hour or so.
Re ratio of infant formula to water, I think MIL might not be able to read markings on the bottle. My mum and nanny was also making mistakes with the quantity of water and infant formula. So what i did was to mark the water level. That helped to some extent. Otherwise, just give ur bb extra serves of water.
re quantity, hereis the link I shared in the earlier posts. http://www.babycenter.com/0_how-to-tell-how-much-formula-your-baby-needs_9136.bc. I guess it's more how much your baby can drink in 24hrs, not at one go. My bb,at 9 months, only drinks 5-6 ounces at one go. I used to force him to drink more, but after reading this article, it really took the pressure off me, and I was able to focus on the bigger pic which was to ensure that he meets his daily. Find the timings where bb drinks more, and see if you can push.
Hi ladies,
Wonder u ladies have any problem making your child taking his/her nap or even sleeping at nite? Lately, my girl likes to play alot and has been very mischievous...she doesn't want to take her nap or sleep...and i have to force her to sleep. Again trying to make her sleep just now is like taking an hour or more to make her fall asleep.
babylove,
Thanks for sharing how much formula our bb needs...its very useful as my girl don drink much.
Wonder u ladies have any problem making your child taking his/her nap or even sleeping at nite? Lately, my girl likes to play alot and has been very mischievous...she doesn't want to take her nap or sleep...and i have to force her to sleep. Again trying to make her sleep just now is like taking an hour or more to make her fall asleep.
babylove,
Thanks for sharing how much formula our bb needs...its very useful as my girl don drink much.
iwantitvmuch
Member
BlesswBB, you can start reading to her now. Not sure if it will help but since she doesn't want to sleep, this is the time to cultivate the reading.
Maybe practise disclosure to her.
Dream, no, I haven't reduced the milk intake. In fact, I've up the milk to 5 oz(finally) and took BlesswBB's advise to increase the time duration. So now, every 4 hours, 5 oz. No more 3 hrs, I think. I left it to my MIL. My MIL make pork ribs and fish broth and mix with baby rice.
I'm going to buy Gina Ford baby receipe book. I think I want to go ang moh cos the food is more nutritious than porridge. I think my MIL will introduce porridge next month. So, I better let her read the receipe book. Luckily, my MIL is quite channel 5.
Maybe practise disclosure to her.
Dream, no, I haven't reduced the milk intake. In fact, I've up the milk to 5 oz(finally) and took BlesswBB's advise to increase the time duration. So now, every 4 hours, 5 oz. No more 3 hrs, I think. I left it to my MIL. My MIL make pork ribs and fish broth and mix with baby rice.
I'm going to buy Gina Ford baby receipe book. I think I want to go ang moh cos the food is more nutritious than porridge. I think my MIL will introduce porridge next month. So, I better let her read the receipe book. Luckily, my MIL is quite channel 5.
babylove80
New Member
iwantitverymuch,
I am okie with mummyportia joining us on FB.
I am okie with mummyportia joining us on FB.
iwantitvmuch,
I tried practising disclosure talk to her but end up crying haha...donno when the time comes can i do it anot...if really very hard think will ask my hubby to do the job...he's better in it anyway.
The problem is when i hold a book in my hands she will start to explore it and even try to tear it...she really very "jian" cannot sit still.
Think i will have to buy baby receipe book like u too since she taking breakfast now instead of drinking her milk.
I tried practising disclosure talk to her but end up crying haha...donno when the time comes can i do it anot...if really very hard think will ask my hubby to do the job...he's better in it anyway.
The problem is when i hold a book in my hands she will start to explore it and even try to tear it...she really very "jian" cannot sit still.
Think i will have to buy baby receipe book like u too since she taking breakfast now instead of drinking her milk.
iwantitvmuch
Member
BlesswBB, you are very funny! <<end>> what were you thinking of that you end up crying??
Dodo, I will read your email when I get home. can't access in office.
Dodo, I will read your email when I get home. can't access in office.
iwantitvmuch,
Since you going ang moh on food there is one of the website that have bb food receipe.
Hope u find it interesting
http://www.annabelkarmel.com/recipes/babies-6-9-months/fish-sweet-potato
Since you going ang moh on food there is one of the website that have bb food receipe.
Hope u find it interesting
http://www.annabelkarmel.com/recipes/babies-6-9-months/fish-sweet-potato
Blesswbb & Yuli,
Another big milestone for your baby! standing up is great! I guess they will be walking soon. It is amazing how bbs develop.
My little boy has made lots of progress this week! He now can turn on both sides and both directions. He is trying to crawl but he can move around by rolling around. It is actually quite scary as he is really quick and we need to keep an eye on him at all times.
Iwantitvmuch,
I would most likely give a mix of both western and Asian food as well, like Mummyportia. I also feel that western is more nutritious. So far, he tried banana (mixed with the white cereal), sweet potato, carrot and pumpkin. Will most likely try green vegetables next week (bought some spinach, asparagus) and apple.
Mummyportia,
Thanks again for your earlier tip. Very useful.
Blesswbb,
Thanks for sharing that website. Will bookmark it. What have you tried so far?
As for the disclosure,HUGS to you. I am sure it is tough and remember, practice makes perfect. And only when you are ready, you need to tell her. And the good thing is that you have lots of time to practice until she really understands what it means! She is only 8 months!
Sweetcl,
The ladies have given you lots of advice. I guess you are not alone in this!
Another big milestone for your baby! standing up is great! I guess they will be walking soon. It is amazing how bbs develop.
My little boy has made lots of progress this week! He now can turn on both sides and both directions. He is trying to crawl but he can move around by rolling around. It is actually quite scary as he is really quick and we need to keep an eye on him at all times.
Iwantitvmuch,
I would most likely give a mix of both western and Asian food as well, like Mummyportia. I also feel that western is more nutritious. So far, he tried banana (mixed with the white cereal), sweet potato, carrot and pumpkin. Will most likely try green vegetables next week (bought some spinach, asparagus) and apple.
Mummyportia,
Thanks again for your earlier tip. Very useful.
Blesswbb,
Thanks for sharing that website. Will bookmark it. What have you tried so far?
As for the disclosure,HUGS to you. I am sure it is tough and remember, practice makes perfect. And only when you are ready, you need to tell her. And the good thing is that you have lots of time to practice until she really understands what it means! She is only 8 months!
Sweetcl,
The ladies have given you lots of advice. I guess you are not alone in this!
BlesswBB,
Ya I also found u were so cute to practise the disclosure talk and end up crying???!!! How abt recording it on video and pass it to DD when the time is rite? Can make it abit more special..like filming her as a baby for abit before u start the talking..taht way when DD is older she can see herself as a baby, how pretty n happy mummy looked when she (baby) came into ur life.
Ya I also found u were so cute to practise the disclosure talk and end up crying???!!! How abt recording it on video and pass it to DD when the time is rite? Can make it abit more special..like filming her as a baby for abit before u start the talking..taht way when DD is older she can see herself as a baby, how pretty n happy mummy looked when she (baby) came into ur life.
Well, most of the babies that we helped, the parents didn't keep in contact and there are cases that the parents moved once they finished with the adoption...
My mum helped those childless couples out of coincidence...Mostly by introduction by friends... Personal... and we only adopted girls from China....The first baby was found in a box during the cold chinese New Year in the streets...
I remember the generic rule is after the adoption, about 6 months later, send a picture to us to make sure that the baby is in good hands...
die, dun be depressed. If you choose to forgive then got to learn to accept him again... Saw this when I was growing up... If end up quarreling all the time, then it becomes really depressing for the whole family.... Both need to work really hard to make it work again
My mum helped those childless couples out of coincidence...Mostly by introduction by friends... Personal... and we only adopted girls from China....The first baby was found in a box during the cold chinese New Year in the streets...
I remember the generic rule is after the adoption, about 6 months later, send a picture to us to make sure that the baby is in good hands...
die, dun be depressed. If you choose to forgive then got to learn to accept him again... Saw this when I was growing up... If end up quarreling all the time, then it becomes really depressing for the whole family.... Both need to work really hard to make it work again
