Advise on Baby & Maid Exps
- Thread starter erkerk
- Start date
josephine27
Member
Any mummies hav good recommend for part time helper? Can come on weekend. Looking for 1..thks.
mummies, i need some advise here.. I really cannot tahan my maid aldy.. yday my elder boy ask her to read for him and she doesnt wan. so my boy throw a tantrum and hit her. But its not very hard one.. Normally when i see my boy beating her, i will stop him and ask him to apologise.. so nw my boy doesnt really dare to beat her.. BUT still, she shouted like very pain, and scold my boy, says if u beat me again, i will tell your daddy and ask him to beat you. @#$% Was really piss off.. I was there.. and all the while when I saw my boy beating her i will stop him and scold him myself.. why does she have to drag my hb in... I feel like sending her back to agent... but recently always raining, if i send her back nw i wont have anyone to help my mum to send my elder boy to sch. dan my mum will have to carry my bb and bring the elder boy to sch by herself. I am waiting for new bios from the agent as the current ones that the agent have does not suit me... Tempting to change a agent.. but my current one not bad aldy.. I quite like their service... haiz.. Mummies, will you just bite the bullet and send the maid back, or jus renzzz.. and wait for the new maid?
May,
is it possible to go on sch bus for your elder one?
If not, you really bo bian but to renzzz. Cos its hard for elderly to push pram cum take brolly cum hold hand with a child in bad weather. Even if its not raining also quite challenging.
Or perhaps there are sch mates ard your estate and you get to know their ah ma or parents and can help you to bring your son to sch?
is it possible to go on sch bus for your elder one?
If not, you really bo bian but to renzzz. Cos its hard for elderly to push pram cum take brolly cum hold hand with a child in bad weather. Even if its not raining also quite challenging.
Or perhaps there are sch mates ard your estate and you get to know their ah ma or parents and can help you to bring your son to sch?
May, ur maid like very papaya... use u and ur hubby to 'press' ur son. If my gal hit my maid, when i ask my maid, she will say no, trying to protect my gal which i told her she cant do that also. if i am in ur shoes, i might not be able to take it.. like so petty. kids wat....
http://newpaper.asia1.com.sg/news/story/0,4136,175566,00.html?
I am not sure why those maid who involve crime case but get away easily or get v liniment punishment.
I am not sure why those maid who involve crime case but get away easily or get v liniment punishment.
I think I have to put in a word for the foreign domestic workers in Singapore. I see many posts lambasting maids for this and that minor transgressions. But sometimes as employers, we have to think whether we are good employers ourselves, or have unrealistic expectations? We should also check ourselves to see whether our demands are reasonable or not.
Maids are here to earn a living for their family back home. If we are afraid we get a bad maid, they are even more afraid to get a bad employer. If we are unhappy with her, we can always go to the agent and get a transfer, for a small fee that hardly makes a dent on our income. What recourse do they have? If they request for a transfer, they are slapped with expenses that will take another 1-2 months to clear, depending on how fast they get a new employer.
Most of them are overseas for the first time. Employers like to get younger maids barely out of their teens, thinking that they are easier to control. But bear in mind since they are still young, they are essentially only children themselves. Coming to Singapore is like seeing the big world, an adventure. They may not be prepared for the dry job of being a domestic 24/7, with no off day, no handphones to keep contact with family, not allowed to write letters, if unlucky, salary withheld, and so on.
Let me ask you this, if you are required to live with your boss and his family in a foreign country, work from 7am till 10pm, sometimes longer, put up with scoldings, no off days, not allowed to talk to fellow country men, not allowed to contact your family unless given permission only at certain times of the day, seriously, wouldn't you go mad?
If you have never worked in a foreign country alone, then you will never understand the homesickness they feel. Studying overseas alone does not even come close as there are plenty of schoolmates to commiserate with.
My take is, let them have their handphones. And let them have their off days. If they are dishonest or have character flaws, by all means transfer them. But please check to see whether your rules are unreasonable to begin with. You treat them well, they will treat you well. Like someone mentioned in this forum, please treat them like you want your boss to treat you.
How many of you pay your helper a year end bonus? I know it's not in the contract, but it's a good thing to do. If you expect your boss to pay you a 13 month bonus, why not give your maid one too?
Maids are here to earn a living for their family back home. If we are afraid we get a bad maid, they are even more afraid to get a bad employer. If we are unhappy with her, we can always go to the agent and get a transfer, for a small fee that hardly makes a dent on our income. What recourse do they have? If they request for a transfer, they are slapped with expenses that will take another 1-2 months to clear, depending on how fast they get a new employer.
Most of them are overseas for the first time. Employers like to get younger maids barely out of their teens, thinking that they are easier to control. But bear in mind since they are still young, they are essentially only children themselves. Coming to Singapore is like seeing the big world, an adventure. They may not be prepared for the dry job of being a domestic 24/7, with no off day, no handphones to keep contact with family, not allowed to write letters, if unlucky, salary withheld, and so on.
Let me ask you this, if you are required to live with your boss and his family in a foreign country, work from 7am till 10pm, sometimes longer, put up with scoldings, no off days, not allowed to talk to fellow country men, not allowed to contact your family unless given permission only at certain times of the day, seriously, wouldn't you go mad?
If you have never worked in a foreign country alone, then you will never understand the homesickness they feel. Studying overseas alone does not even come close as there are plenty of schoolmates to commiserate with.
My take is, let them have their handphones. And let them have their off days. If they are dishonest or have character flaws, by all means transfer them. But please check to see whether your rules are unreasonable to begin with. You treat them well, they will treat you well. Like someone mentioned in this forum, please treat them like you want your boss to treat you.
How many of you pay your helper a year end bonus? I know it's not in the contract, but it's a good thing to do. If you expect your boss to pay you a 13 month bonus, why not give your maid one too?
chobeemama,
perhaps you are lucky to have a good maid or you have not gotten a maid before. Yes, some of the complains here might be minor.
But there are so many of us having our trust being betrayed. I have hired maids that are 23 and also 31 yrs old but none worked out. Was it becos i was an bad employer, i dun think so as i do not restrict their movements or give them a strict roaster to follow.
The main problem perhaps lies in the agent and the govt laws.
Have the agents be more honest and diligent in their training and sourcing of maids, prep them for what is expected as domestic help, basic moral values, then we will not have shortcharged! And you still find underage indo maids these days, and you cannot reject them when they are here. You are forced to use them for at least 2 mths before the agent give you a replacement.
The govt laws also tend to protect them more due to diplomacy issues. Hence employers are really at the losing end. You are wrong at the expenses hardly made a dent at our income. Alot of us here do feel the pinch when we have to forfeit insurance, levy etc.
Sorry for ranting here but i would really say 90% of the time, its the maid's quality that made us rant here abt them.
End of the day, i belong to the group that give up on maids totally and send my kid to cc. It was heart wrenching for the last few days to hear his cries when i drop him off. But at least i know he is safe and well taken care off.
perhaps you are lucky to have a good maid or you have not gotten a maid before. Yes, some of the complains here might be minor.
But there are so many of us having our trust being betrayed. I have hired maids that are 23 and also 31 yrs old but none worked out. Was it becos i was an bad employer, i dun think so as i do not restrict their movements or give them a strict roaster to follow.
The main problem perhaps lies in the agent and the govt laws.
Have the agents be more honest and diligent in their training and sourcing of maids, prep them for what is expected as domestic help, basic moral values, then we will not have shortcharged! And you still find underage indo maids these days, and you cannot reject them when they are here. You are forced to use them for at least 2 mths before the agent give you a replacement.
The govt laws also tend to protect them more due to diplomacy issues. Hence employers are really at the losing end. You are wrong at the expenses hardly made a dent at our income. Alot of us here do feel the pinch when we have to forfeit insurance, levy etc.
Sorry for ranting here but i would really say 90% of the time, its the maid's quality that made us rant here abt them.
End of the day, i belong to the group that give up on maids totally and send my kid to cc. It was heart wrenching for the last few days to hear his cries when i drop him off. But at least i know he is safe and well taken care off.
I think at the end of the day, it's also abt the kind of communication we have with the maids. These maids have frens/relatives who have come to SG to work as maids before. So I'm sure they would have heard "horror stories" of what can happen to maids here. They would also have learnt about "how to/what to do, to avoid much scoldings" etc. Hence, when they come to SG to work, they would have "prepared" themselves with a certain mindset that they think would help them "minimise" their "supposed-suffering", in case there really is. Hence, a large number of them step into SG prepared to behave in a certain way...
Yet on the other hand, employers have also heard of how terrible maids can be. And so we have come up with our various sets of rules to (hopefully) achieve our objectives of employing a maid, and keep our families safe. And the maid would have to "fit" into these rules.
We have to communicate clearly to them at each point...
I always ask HB if we've been too tough. But HB feels that we've been too lax, that our maid has taken adv of us. I would bring up points like, "not easy, being in foreign country etc...not correct to talk in that manner (MIL likes to talk to maid in condescending manner), will miss family also, so got moods etc..." and I'll always get scolding from HB for defending maid's rights. Coz HB will ask me "what about my (hb's) rights?" She peeps into our documents, takes our stuff, ignores instructions...okaayy... We didn't have the list of rules etc for her when she first came. End up, she really took adv of the situation. So, it's a confluence of factors - maid's character, how we treat them, their mindset, our mindset...
It's just a mis-match between my maid and my family. One man's meat is another's poison.
She and another family may thrive together...
Yet on the other hand, employers have also heard of how terrible maids can be. And so we have come up with our various sets of rules to (hopefully) achieve our objectives of employing a maid, and keep our families safe. And the maid would have to "fit" into these rules.
We have to communicate clearly to them at each point...
I always ask HB if we've been too tough. But HB feels that we've been too lax, that our maid has taken adv of us. I would bring up points like, "not easy, being in foreign country etc...not correct to talk in that manner (MIL likes to talk to maid in condescending manner), will miss family also, so got moods etc..." and I'll always get scolding from HB for defending maid's rights. Coz HB will ask me "what about my (hb's) rights?" She peeps into our documents, takes our stuff, ignores instructions...okaayy... We didn't have the list of rules etc for her when she first came. End up, she really took adv of the situation. So, it's a confluence of factors - maid's character, how we treat them, their mindset, our mindset...
It's just a mis-match between my maid and my family. One man's meat is another's poison.
Hi Ivy,
Yes, perhaps I am lucky to have found a good maid. I think in this forum, many posts are about bad maids and their misdemeanors, and seldom do I see someone talking about how good her maid is, for fear of appearing gloating. But these posts in all gives a very skewed picture of the actual fact that many maids are good and hardworking and trustworthy. But no one sing their praises. My friends and neighbours and colleagues have maids, and they are like I have said, good and hardworking and trustworthy.
I'm wrote the previous post more to highlight the mindset of the maids when they come here. I'm not saying I understand what's going through their minds fully, but after spending more than a year chatting with my helper, I sort of can understand their fears and the mistreatment they have to endure.
Many agents here are unscrupulous, or treat the maids as commodities. The way they source for maids is to get an agent in Philippines/Indonesia/wherever to make false promises (like salary deduction for 3 months), and when the maids are here, they discover it is in actual fact 6 months. But they have already "gotten on the boat" so they are forced to sign whatever is placed in front of them. As for screening, anyone who is willing to sign up as a maid and have passed medical checkup is admitted. Training is at best minimal, done at the home of the agent, i.e. do house work, in the name of training. But to be fair, agents can't teach/train basic moral values. Only their families can. No one can screen for the dishonest/lazy gene. Even if you interview Singaporeans to work for you, can you detect it? I can't. I have Singaporean uni grads reporting to me at work. Sometimes they msn too much, forget what I tell them, do the wrong things, break things due to carelessness. Even so, I can't deduct their salary or say they can't talk to their colleagues and must work all day.
The govt laws, i.e. the $5000 bond, maid levy, etc are unreasonable. But for that shouldn't we petition the govt to change it? Ask the MPs to raise it in parliament? Rather than use that as an excuse to restrict maid movement, who she interacts with, and in other words, practise modern day slavery?
Maids are maids because they are not as educated as we are, and also they are from different cultures, and so have different social mores and values. If they are smart and quick and discerning like we are, then they will probably not be maids. So for the $350 per month, you get the quality you pay for.
I think I'm gonna get flamed for this post, But I feel I have to speak up for them too.
Yes, perhaps I am lucky to have found a good maid. I think in this forum, many posts are about bad maids and their misdemeanors, and seldom do I see someone talking about how good her maid is, for fear of appearing gloating. But these posts in all gives a very skewed picture of the actual fact that many maids are good and hardworking and trustworthy. But no one sing their praises. My friends and neighbours and colleagues have maids, and they are like I have said, good and hardworking and trustworthy.
I'm wrote the previous post more to highlight the mindset of the maids when they come here. I'm not saying I understand what's going through their minds fully, but after spending more than a year chatting with my helper, I sort of can understand their fears and the mistreatment they have to endure.
Many agents here are unscrupulous, or treat the maids as commodities. The way they source for maids is to get an agent in Philippines/Indonesia/wherever to make false promises (like salary deduction for 3 months), and when the maids are here, they discover it is in actual fact 6 months. But they have already "gotten on the boat" so they are forced to sign whatever is placed in front of them. As for screening, anyone who is willing to sign up as a maid and have passed medical checkup is admitted. Training is at best minimal, done at the home of the agent, i.e. do house work, in the name of training. But to be fair, agents can't teach/train basic moral values. Only their families can. No one can screen for the dishonest/lazy gene. Even if you interview Singaporeans to work for you, can you detect it? I can't. I have Singaporean uni grads reporting to me at work. Sometimes they msn too much, forget what I tell them, do the wrong things, break things due to carelessness. Even so, I can't deduct their salary or say they can't talk to their colleagues and must work all day.
The govt laws, i.e. the $5000 bond, maid levy, etc are unreasonable. But for that shouldn't we petition the govt to change it? Ask the MPs to raise it in parliament? Rather than use that as an excuse to restrict maid movement, who she interacts with, and in other words, practise modern day slavery?
Maids are maids because they are not as educated as we are, and also they are from different cultures, and so have different social mores and values. If they are smart and quick and discerning like we are, then they will probably not be maids. So for the $350 per month, you get the quality you pay for.
I think I'm gonna get flamed for this post, But I feel I have to speak up for them too.
hi chobemama, I used to think the same like you. Until I have a round of maid who really make me change my mind. Its unfair for you to say things like
"Let me ask you this, if you are required to live with your boss and his family in a foreign country, work from 7am till 10pm, sometimes longer, put up with scoldings, no off days, not allowed to talk to fellow country men, not allowed to contact your family unless given permission only at certain times of the day, seriously, wouldn't you go mad? "
but I wont go into it... as I think you wouldnt understand until you get a maid like ours... or maybe you like to do a exchange?
"Let me ask you this, if you are required to live with your boss and his family in a foreign country, work from 7am till 10pm, sometimes longer, put up with scoldings, no off days, not allowed to talk to fellow country men, not allowed to contact your family unless given permission only at certain times of the day, seriously, wouldn't you go mad? "
but I wont go into it... as I think you wouldnt understand until you get a maid like ours... or maybe you like to do a exchange?
Hi May, maybe you should ask your agent to do the exchange. I am hanging on to my helper for dear life! If you want I can ask my helper to intro her cousin to you. 
I don't think I am unfair to ask the question. Because I do have a colleague who thinks that bringing her maid out to meet her own friends and family constitute a day off for the maid. I definitely wouldn't want to hang out with my boss' family and friends and find that restful.
I don't think I am unfair to ask the question. Because I do have a colleague who thinks that bringing her maid out to meet her own friends and family constitute a day off for the maid. I definitely wouldn't want to hang out with my boss' family and friends and find that restful.
hi chobemama,
if you had followed our thread, you will noted that we DO sing praises of good maids.
I cannot agree with " you get the quality you pay for". Haven employers here tried to reward maids with higher pay increment or bonuses? Did their maid appreciate it with better working attitude?
The uni grads that are reporting to you, you can always fire them or give them a poor performace appraisal when they dun do their job well. Did you have to worry about paying extra levy or forfeit insurance costs?
Have we not tried to petition to govt abt the laws, it is not sucessful and what govt tries to do now is to give better subsidy for alternative childcare facilities.
But there are still the elderly and sick that might need domestic help to take care of them. Have you seen maids who accompany the old people for medical checkups and how they shout at the old ppl or drag them in the pretext of holding their hands to make them walk faster?
Yes, there are good maids around but this thread is for us to share our experience and vent out frustrations at the lousy maids that we got and alert others as these lousy maids get "recycled" around. If you are campaigning for the rights of maids, there are other forums for you to go to. And i hope that your maid will continued to be good and never betray your trust in her.
if you had followed our thread, you will noted that we DO sing praises of good maids.
I cannot agree with " you get the quality you pay for". Haven employers here tried to reward maids with higher pay increment or bonuses? Did their maid appreciate it with better working attitude?
The uni grads that are reporting to you, you can always fire them or give them a poor performace appraisal when they dun do their job well. Did you have to worry about paying extra levy or forfeit insurance costs?
Have we not tried to petition to govt abt the laws, it is not sucessful and what govt tries to do now is to give better subsidy for alternative childcare facilities.
But there are still the elderly and sick that might need domestic help to take care of them. Have you seen maids who accompany the old people for medical checkups and how they shout at the old ppl or drag them in the pretext of holding their hands to make them walk faster?
Yes, there are good maids around but this thread is for us to share our experience and vent out frustrations at the lousy maids that we got and alert others as these lousy maids get "recycled" around. If you are campaigning for the rights of maids, there are other forums for you to go to. And i hope that your maid will continued to be good and never betray your trust in her.
Ivy: cool down. If I have to pay $3500, I will be SAHM instead. What I'm saying is, if you pay $350, you really can't expect too much. A lot of it is luck if one gets a good maid, I agree. Or it's a good match. Of course I also have heard of bad ones. But I've also heard of bad employers. It takes two hands to clap in relationships like this. Well, if my helper betrays my trust, then I have no qualms to replace her.
If you have given up on maids, then it's your choice too. If the govt childcare works for you. Whatever floats your boat, dear.
But one thing I know for sure, maids in Singapore prefer to work for angmos than locals. Maybe the pay is higher? or maybe they are treated with more respect than local employers accord them.
If you have given up on maids, then it's your choice too. If the govt childcare works for you. Whatever floats your boat, dear.
But one thing I know for sure, maids in Singapore prefer to work for angmos than locals. Maybe the pay is higher? or maybe they are treated with more respect than local employers accord them.
chobeemama,
i would suggest you really read through all the archives of this thread. And pls do stop generalising saying that most of us here are lambasting our maids. Many of the mommies here are very experienced maid employers and have seen enough to be able to tell you that there are really many maids out there who do not respect or appreciate their employment.
I personally had experienced one such maid and because of her and the result of our hiring of her (causing a lot of conflicts between family members), I had to give up my job to stay home to correct the situation.
I had recently hired yet another maid. For the last three months until today, I thought she was not too bad and had hopes that she'll probably be the last maid we'll be hiring. But I think I was wrong. I was nice to her. Her workload is light in many people's pt of view: she's a resident cleaner and food preparer. She doesn't need to handle much childcare. I thought she was ok as I slowly loaded her with more childcare duties and simple cooking. and I thought I could go away for a short trip leaving her to help my mum to look aft my son. But I was wrong.
When I returned, I heard the feedback from my mum and I wasn't very happy with it. Some of the things she did/didn't do:
1. Threw away a whole plate of veggies because it was not nice to eat (she fried it herself)
2. Rushed through my boy's routine and made my mum put him to bed 1.5hr earlier than usual. Resulting in my mum having to handle my fussy boy for 2 hours before he actually fell asleep.
3. Did not mop the floor for 2 days
4. Force fed my boy even though she had done feeding before (no force feeding allowed and partial self-feeding is practiced) None of the usual habits of my boy was practised.
5. Despite my instructions (all written down), she cut the food portions for my mum's meals
6. Despite my SPECIFIC instructions, she prepared food that was too salty for my mum, resulting in my mum's HBP rising.
7. Instead of doing her cleaning, she was caught reading newspapers in the afternoon.
8. She's not allowed to talk to neighbours or others about our movements or any other affairs, but she did. The best part was, my neighbour was chatting with my mum, not her. She disclosed to my neighbour about our travelling schedules.
well, I treat her like how my ang moh friends treat their maids. Completely professional, trusting and flexible. I have been generous too when I lunch out. I take her with me and I let her order what she wants to eat, and this happens almost on a weekly basis. We share our nice food with her. She gets a portion of our salmon and organic beef
...yet things like that happen. so what's your take?? so i'm a bad employer??
i would suggest you really read through all the archives of this thread. And pls do stop generalising saying that most of us here are lambasting our maids. Many of the mommies here are very experienced maid employers and have seen enough to be able to tell you that there are really many maids out there who do not respect or appreciate their employment.
I personally had experienced one such maid and because of her and the result of our hiring of her (causing a lot of conflicts between family members), I had to give up my job to stay home to correct the situation.
I had recently hired yet another maid. For the last three months until today, I thought she was not too bad and had hopes that she'll probably be the last maid we'll be hiring. But I think I was wrong. I was nice to her. Her workload is light in many people's pt of view: she's a resident cleaner and food preparer. She doesn't need to handle much childcare. I thought she was ok as I slowly loaded her with more childcare duties and simple cooking. and I thought I could go away for a short trip leaving her to help my mum to look aft my son. But I was wrong.
When I returned, I heard the feedback from my mum and I wasn't very happy with it. Some of the things she did/didn't do:
1. Threw away a whole plate of veggies because it was not nice to eat (she fried it herself)
2. Rushed through my boy's routine and made my mum put him to bed 1.5hr earlier than usual. Resulting in my mum having to handle my fussy boy for 2 hours before he actually fell asleep.
3. Did not mop the floor for 2 days
4. Force fed my boy even though she had done feeding before (no force feeding allowed and partial self-feeding is practiced) None of the usual habits of my boy was practised.
5. Despite my instructions (all written down), she cut the food portions for my mum's meals
6. Despite my SPECIFIC instructions, she prepared food that was too salty for my mum, resulting in my mum's HBP rising.
7. Instead of doing her cleaning, she was caught reading newspapers in the afternoon.
8. She's not allowed to talk to neighbours or others about our movements or any other affairs, but she did. The best part was, my neighbour was chatting with my mum, not her. She disclosed to my neighbour about our travelling schedules.
well, I treat her like how my ang moh friends treat their maids. Completely professional, trusting and flexible. I have been generous too when I lunch out. I take her with me and I let her order what she wants to eat, and this happens almost on a weekly basis. We share our nice food with her. She gets a portion of our salmon and organic beef
...yet things like that happen. so what's your take?? so i'm a bad employer??
oh i forgot to add, chobeemama,
i used to think that this maid was much better than my previous ones cos she wasn't a nosy parker..at least not upfront...my previous maids were more interested in which model my hp was, what brands our clothes are, how many branded bags i have and so on...
again i was wrong. She eavesdropped on my conversations with hubby over some childcare issues we need to work out on with my mum. How I found out? well, that very day, we saw her crying in the kitchen. When I asked her what the matter was, she told me she thought she had done something wrong and we would terminate her..
Well darn right i will if this and the 'loose tongue' incident and another of throwing food away w/o permission happen!
i used to think that this maid was much better than my previous ones cos she wasn't a nosy parker..at least not upfront...my previous maids were more interested in which model my hp was, what brands our clothes are, how many branded bags i have and so on...
again i was wrong. She eavesdropped on my conversations with hubby over some childcare issues we need to work out on with my mum. How I found out? well, that very day, we saw her crying in the kitchen. When I asked her what the matter was, she told me she thought she had done something wrong and we would terminate her..
Well darn right i will if this and the 'loose tongue' incident and another of throwing food away w/o permission happen!
hi Nellu,
She's taking advantage of your kindness already liao! Put her on notice.
I just showed my maid the youtube of san's maid abusing her 3.5month old infant. Those of us who know San know how well she treated her maid right!
I suppose then, if you treat your maid well and they still abuse your kids it wouldn't be too bad to smash their heads in would it?
Coming from an angmoh country myself and giving my 1st maid full freedom and having her take advantage of us and threaten me in my 8th month of pregnancy I definitely do not believe in giving these women free reign. They just do not know how to handle it because they come from a societies that are so fully corrupt that it obviously rubs off on the underpriviliged underclass whereby they think lying, stealing, cheating and slacking off is simply an accepted part of life.
Yes indeed, you sure do get what you pay for so my expectations are pretty low.
That said, my current maid is still ok. No complaints.
She's taking advantage of your kindness already liao! Put her on notice.
I just showed my maid the youtube of san's maid abusing her 3.5month old infant. Those of us who know San know how well she treated her maid right!
I suppose then, if you treat your maid well and they still abuse your kids it wouldn't be too bad to smash their heads in would it?
Coming from an angmoh country myself and giving my 1st maid full freedom and having her take advantage of us and threaten me in my 8th month of pregnancy I definitely do not believe in giving these women free reign. They just do not know how to handle it because they come from a societies that are so fully corrupt that it obviously rubs off on the underpriviliged underclass whereby they think lying, stealing, cheating and slacking off is simply an accepted part of life.
Yes indeed, you sure do get what you pay for so my expectations are pretty low.
That said, my current maid is still ok. No complaints.
Hi nellu, I am expecting to be flamed for posting an alternative view, anyway. No I didn't read the whole thread archived all the way till 2005, cos the people are different, and only a few like you, are still around here. I find that although different people, the message are all about the same. Mostly strategies on how to control errant maids.
I have to admit I don't have a long time experience hiring maids. I've only had her for one year. Before I employed mine, I was also worried about these things, whether she will hit the baby, steal things, etc. So although I say I trust her, I don't tempt her with valuables lying around or asking her to buy our weekly grocery. Right from the beginning, I laid out my expectations of her, based on the things I can do. If I cannot do those things in one day, then I cannot expect her to do them. But I don't restrict her movement, her food intake, her phone calls, or sms. I don't have CCTV, nor check her hp, nor check her mail, nor check her bag nor bedroom. She keeps her own passport. I give her my transitlink card with auto top-up (I pay). If she wants to run, so be it. Of course I worry about my money, but then, I have to be fair to her. One thing I have to add is that she is 40 years old, old by some standards, but I am fine with that. I am younger than her.
I can't say whether you are good or bad employer. cos I dunno you nor your domestic helper. I'd just like to point out domestic helpers also have their stresses. They come here with debts, as they borrowed money from neighbours and family to come here. So, even though they suffer, they have no voice, no protection, until abuse happens. And employers look down on them, don't give them respect, but expect respect from them. And take candid pictures of maids standing by the roadside chatting and commenting on their makeup (see archive 2005). To me, that is disrespectful.
But if one is unhappy with the maid, then transfer her, until you get the right one. No need to scold, hit, withhold salary, whatever. if really nothing works, then there is childcare now with heavier subsidies.
I have to admit I don't have a long time experience hiring maids. I've only had her for one year. Before I employed mine, I was also worried about these things, whether she will hit the baby, steal things, etc. So although I say I trust her, I don't tempt her with valuables lying around or asking her to buy our weekly grocery. Right from the beginning, I laid out my expectations of her, based on the things I can do. If I cannot do those things in one day, then I cannot expect her to do them. But I don't restrict her movement, her food intake, her phone calls, or sms. I don't have CCTV, nor check her hp, nor check her mail, nor check her bag nor bedroom. She keeps her own passport. I give her my transitlink card with auto top-up (I pay). If she wants to run, so be it. Of course I worry about my money, but then, I have to be fair to her. One thing I have to add is that she is 40 years old, old by some standards, but I am fine with that. I am younger than her.
I can't say whether you are good or bad employer. cos I dunno you nor your domestic helper. I'd just like to point out domestic helpers also have their stresses. They come here with debts, as they borrowed money from neighbours and family to come here. So, even though they suffer, they have no voice, no protection, until abuse happens. And employers look down on them, don't give them respect, but expect respect from them. And take candid pictures of maids standing by the roadside chatting and commenting on their makeup (see archive 2005). To me, that is disrespectful.
But if one is unhappy with the maid, then transfer her, until you get the right one. No need to scold, hit, withhold salary, whatever. if really nothing works, then there is childcare now with heavier subsidies.
Liana,
definitely putting the maid on notice. Going to see how she'll buck up in the next 1 week.
yup! I so agree with you that San treated her maid real well and this is what she got from the maid. It's totally unfair!
and yes, they have no capability of handling the freedom and trust that are bestowed on them. And their attitude is that "I'm so poor, it's MY RIGHT to behave like this!"
definitely putting the maid on notice. Going to see how she'll buck up in the next 1 week.
yup! I so agree with you that San treated her maid real well and this is what she got from the maid. It's totally unfair!
and yes, they have no capability of handling the freedom and trust that are bestowed on them. And their attitude is that "I'm so poor, it's MY RIGHT to behave like this!"
chobeemama,
so you think your strategies work. Sure of course they do. most of us do the very same things that you do with our maids. So the difference here is the maid!
work wise, if the maid is bad, it's still pretty acceptable to me because I still can train her. But if she infringes into my privacy and be a nosy parket, and deliberately refuses to follow very SPECIFIC instrucations (failing which may be a life and death issue eg my mum's HBP condition), then I think she's not worth the trouble. It's got nothing to do with how i treat her. It's got everything to do with her own attitude towards her job.
so you think your strategies work. Sure of course they do. most of us do the very same things that you do with our maids. So the difference here is the maid!
work wise, if the maid is bad, it's still pretty acceptable to me because I still can train her. But if she infringes into my privacy and be a nosy parket, and deliberately refuses to follow very SPECIFIC instrucations (failing which may be a life and death issue eg my mum's HBP condition), then I think she's not worth the trouble. It's got nothing to do with how i treat her. It's got everything to do with her own attitude towards her job.
oh ya, chobeemama,
I just want to clarify again, in case you think I'm just nitpicking over minor transgressions of my maid. All the mistakes that I have listed above are very obviously committed on the sly when I'm not in town. Because all engines were running smoothly when I was home. The moment I was out of the door, these things seem to suddenly appear. perhaps she's stressed that I'm away huh??!
and btw, i don't scold her, i definitely don't hit her (i'll be really mad if i do!), she's still paying her loan so her salary is almost zilch, I don't spot check her nor go through her stuff either. She preferred that I safekeep her documents, money and hp for her. I respect her as a human being and don't look down on her. I treat her like i would treat any of my ex-staff (when i was working). She knows full well my expectations of her (not much to begin with!). She knows full well the kind of behaviour i expect (just to respect my privacy).
...until today, i had never lumped this particular maid with the other bad ones i knew in the last one year, until i heard the feedback and spoke to her.
I just want to clarify again, in case you think I'm just nitpicking over minor transgressions of my maid. All the mistakes that I have listed above are very obviously committed on the sly when I'm not in town. Because all engines were running smoothly when I was home. The moment I was out of the door, these things seem to suddenly appear. perhaps she's stressed that I'm away huh??!
and btw, i don't scold her, i definitely don't hit her (i'll be really mad if i do!), she's still paying her loan so her salary is almost zilch, I don't spot check her nor go through her stuff either. She preferred that I safekeep her documents, money and hp for her. I respect her as a human being and don't look down on her. I treat her like i would treat any of my ex-staff (when i was working). She knows full well my expectations of her (not much to begin with!). She knows full well the kind of behaviour i expect (just to respect my privacy).
...until today, i had never lumped this particular maid with the other bad ones i knew in the last one year, until i heard the feedback and spoke to her.
chobeemama,
I think most of us here are not angry wif abt how we shld treat our maids but more of how u manage to hit the jackpot to have a good maid and tot your methods works for ALL MAIDS. With the number of complains here and how we treasure one and hold on to our dear life (INCLUDING YOURSELF) just shows how difficult it is to get a reasonable maid.
Yes as much as we may not like not work in the same condition as a maid but at the same time i do not give my boss the following,
1. Shout and argue wif my boss when told nicely that what i have done is not correct
2. Steal my boss's stuff and food (when i am eating more than anyone else in the family)
3. Pays for my air tics home home even though i didn't fulfil her contract
5. Abuse and beat my boss's children
Yes, we dun like the maid we can send them away. But have u experience that yourself. The leaves that need to be taken to babysit the kids b4 a new maid comes along, the training that needs to be taken (which nvr stops bcos they will revert to version 0 on the 2nd mth), the extra money that needed to be spent for the transfer, agency, insurance etc, the mental stress on the poor kid who keeps having a new carer.
At the end of the day, i have gave up totally on maids. I am in my 3rd trimester, i send both my kids to CC, i hold a full time job. I am happier spending more money and being more busy and tired.
I am not being mean but if u have any of those maids that is described in Tamarind's blog. I really wish that your so call more humane method works.
I think most of us here are not angry wif abt how we shld treat our maids but more of how u manage to hit the jackpot to have a good maid and tot your methods works for ALL MAIDS. With the number of complains here and how we treasure one and hold on to our dear life (INCLUDING YOURSELF) just shows how difficult it is to get a reasonable maid.
Yes as much as we may not like not work in the same condition as a maid but at the same time i do not give my boss the following,
1. Shout and argue wif my boss when told nicely that what i have done is not correct
2. Steal my boss's stuff and food (when i am eating more than anyone else in the family)
3. Pays for my air tics home home even though i didn't fulfil her contract
5. Abuse and beat my boss's children
Yes, we dun like the maid we can send them away. But have u experience that yourself. The leaves that need to be taken to babysit the kids b4 a new maid comes along, the training that needs to be taken (which nvr stops bcos they will revert to version 0 on the 2nd mth), the extra money that needed to be spent for the transfer, agency, insurance etc, the mental stress on the poor kid who keeps having a new carer.
At the end of the day, i have gave up totally on maids. I am in my 3rd trimester, i send both my kids to CC, i hold a full time job. I am happier spending more money and being more busy and tired.
I am not being mean but if u have any of those maids that is described in Tamarind's blog. I really wish that your so call more humane method works.
mrs_wang
Member
Chobeemama
In my case where my maid abuse my 3.5mths old, i totally treat her like a responsible adult & gives her all the freedom which i tot would be the least i can make her feel at ease & homely. Wat more can i do to make sure my maid treats my kids well?
Read abt my case at http://singaporemaidcomments.blogspot.com/ about Evangeline.
And when she's able to juggle my 2 kids plus housework on schedule, we were planning to raise her salary to motivate her becos i plan to go out to work. And i shall not bored you wif the details tat her housechores were half bucket of water standard. We simply appreciate her effort.
What saddened me more is when I trust her that she can handle my 2 kids well, i started looking for job. I had a very good job offer the day after i sent her back!! I had to turn it down becos its so untimely!
My strategy used to be treat the maid well FIRST so she will recipocrate. Now I see why "no handphone rule" & witholding their salary works best in our interest becos watever swings the maid's emotion may cause our kids to be hurt. I dun see why we shd risk our kids safety wif people who have no capability of handling the freedom and trust that are bestowed on them.
Nobody is right or wrong on how they want to treat their maids. This thread happened to be a place for employers to share their experience & complaint all we want - trivial or big issues. Your views here is just like we employers go to a maid's thread (if there's any) & tell them how to treat us better. Give us a break. Give us some space to complain.
You may want to voice yr opinion abt human rights for maid in the ST Forum or nominate yr good maid in the MOM publication for FDW! I just saw the Aug issue abt a supper nanny. I can only envy & wonder how i can be a good employer so THEN my maid will be good in return.
In my case where my maid abuse my 3.5mths old, i totally treat her like a responsible adult & gives her all the freedom which i tot would be the least i can make her feel at ease & homely. Wat more can i do to make sure my maid treats my kids well?
Read abt my case at http://singaporemaidcomments.blogspot.com/ about Evangeline.
And when she's able to juggle my 2 kids plus housework on schedule, we were planning to raise her salary to motivate her becos i plan to go out to work. And i shall not bored you wif the details tat her housechores were half bucket of water standard. We simply appreciate her effort.
What saddened me more is when I trust her that she can handle my 2 kids well, i started looking for job. I had a very good job offer the day after i sent her back!! I had to turn it down becos its so untimely!
My strategy used to be treat the maid well FIRST so she will recipocrate. Now I see why "no handphone rule" & witholding their salary works best in our interest becos watever swings the maid's emotion may cause our kids to be hurt. I dun see why we shd risk our kids safety wif people who have no capability of handling the freedom and trust that are bestowed on them.
Nobody is right or wrong on how they want to treat their maids. This thread happened to be a place for employers to share their experience & complaint all we want - trivial or big issues. Your views here is just like we employers go to a maid's thread (if there's any) & tell them how to treat us better. Give us a break. Give us some space to complain.
You may want to voice yr opinion abt human rights for maid in the ST Forum or nominate yr good maid in the MOM publication for FDW! I just saw the Aug issue abt a supper nanny. I can only envy & wonder how i can be a good employer so THEN my maid will be good in return.
haiz... my maid on hunger strike again. bcos... tis morning i ask her to clean my room, dan less dan 30mins room and toilet cleaned. I went in to check, toilet not clean, even got a big toothpaste mark which was make when my son accidentally squeeze the toothpaste out. I ask her in and show her the mark.. she says clean aldy. I use my finger the rub on the mark, no need to use strenght the mark came off.. the table top is full of dust.. u can see a layer on dust on it. Talk nicely to her, but she black face me... dan nvm.. no point angry with her, I cook noodles for family just nw, scope 1 bowl for her.. I stand in the kitche, she eat. the moment I step out, she pour everything away.
ter_wen
Active Member
i agree with b2b3b4.
and to quote u:
"But if one is unhappy with the maid, then transfer her, until you get the right one. No need to scold, hit, withhold salary, whatever. if really nothing works, then there is childcare now with heavier subsidies."
i dun think any one of us here abuse maids.
here is more like a channel for us to vent our frustrations in the midst of transfer, or to seek solutions/advice to defiant maids.
and sometimes, it's not just child care.
how about those with elderly parents to take care of?
or even dependents with special needs?
and to quote u:
"But if one is unhappy with the maid, then transfer her, until you get the right one. No need to scold, hit, withhold salary, whatever. if really nothing works, then there is childcare now with heavier subsidies."
i dun think any one of us here abuse maids.
here is more like a channel for us to vent our frustrations in the midst of transfer, or to seek solutions/advice to defiant maids.
and sometimes, it's not just child care.
how about those with elderly parents to take care of?
or even dependents with special needs?
mrs_wang
Member
just now hubby spoke to a philipino lady referred by a fren's maid. Just by talking to her, i dun even feel like trying her. She demand for $340 even before we can access her ON THE PHONE! We are prepared to pay the market rate or even higher after putting her on trial. Even explained to her the purpose of trial. Making demands like that scares us off ... she sounds like my previous maid. Pay first, perform later.
cheerful747
Active Member
May
I think your maid has no heart to work for you and take you for granted...sometimes, we have to let it go...
Ipod
Today, my maid was caught red handed listening to my gal ipod without her permission when she is out...My gal told me no wonder her battery is always flat and different songs when she is home...
I just told my maid, she has to learn to have manners, ask others first before she take , eat or use....she told me she is learning...
I also told her, when she has enough money she can buy her own ipod but NO HANDPHONE is allowed. She says she knows...
Many will think why i so stupid to talk to her but I cannot handle her like a fresh maid cos she is three years ex malaysia kopitiam maid, already over exposed....as it is, will never talk her if I was told about her background.
I just make the best I can cos already put into this, and has to deal and manage it as long as she is still working.
I think your maid has no heart to work for you and take you for granted...sometimes, we have to let it go...
Ipod
Today, my maid was caught red handed listening to my gal ipod without her permission when she is out...My gal told me no wonder her battery is always flat and different songs when she is home...
I just told my maid, she has to learn to have manners, ask others first before she take , eat or use....she told me she is learning...
I also told her, when she has enough money she can buy her own ipod but NO HANDPHONE is allowed. She says she knows...
Many will think why i so stupid to talk to her but I cannot handle her like a fresh maid cos she is three years ex malaysia kopitiam maid, already over exposed....as it is, will never talk her if I was told about her background.
I just make the best I can cos already put into this, and has to deal and manage it as long as she is still working.
joy747,
i talk to my maid also. I cannot handle her like fresh maid because i found out aft she came that she is actually EX-HK, not EX-PH as the agent had mentioned. I could have sent her straight back but because she had been quite ok so i kept her till now.
I was only away for 4 days then suddenly a lot of things change. what really irks me most is that she broke the rule by answering my neighbour when he wasn't even talking to her. She's starting to behave like she's the boss!
Also many things that I had instructed her to do has suddenly changed. she made it look like she's the one with initiative making the changes when actually the changes were not necessary. again behaving like she's the boss.
I'm really angry with her again today. Yday she told me the dryer sounded funny, like going to break down. I tested and sure enough it sounded weird. Because of the wet weather recently i didn't hesitate to call the service people. Guess what happened today? The repairman came and just fished out a $1 coin in the dryer where we put the clothes in!! I had to pay for the repairman's transport fees! For nothing I paid $60 so that the guy can get the $1 out!! Really angry!! cos obviously the maid didn't do her job well!
i talk to my maid also. I cannot handle her like fresh maid because i found out aft she came that she is actually EX-HK, not EX-PH as the agent had mentioned. I could have sent her straight back but because she had been quite ok so i kept her till now.
I was only away for 4 days then suddenly a lot of things change. what really irks me most is that she broke the rule by answering my neighbour when he wasn't even talking to her. She's starting to behave like she's the boss!
Also many things that I had instructed her to do has suddenly changed. she made it look like she's the one with initiative making the changes when actually the changes were not necessary. again behaving like she's the boss.
I'm really angry with her again today. Yday she told me the dryer sounded funny, like going to break down. I tested and sure enough it sounded weird. Because of the wet weather recently i didn't hesitate to call the service people. Guess what happened today? The repairman came and just fished out a $1 coin in the dryer where we put the clothes in!! I had to pay for the repairman's transport fees! For nothing I paid $60 so that the guy can get the $1 out!! Really angry!! cos obviously the maid didn't do her job well!
cheerful747
Active Member
nellu
Pay 60 dollar to fish out a dollar coin...I will be hoping mad....
We are in the same shoes.This kind of maid, at times, we really do not when they are real and when is fake...am so sick and tired of it...what to do,if want someone to do the housework , just have to close one eye for the moment...I bet for my maid, there are many things I yet to discover...as she is an experience maid..sometime, we are underestimating them....
Pay 60 dollar to fish out a dollar coin...I will be hoping mad....
We are in the same shoes.This kind of maid, at times, we really do not when they are real and when is fake...am so sick and tired of it...what to do,if want someone to do the housework , just have to close one eye for the moment...I bet for my maid, there are many things I yet to discover...as she is an experience maid..sometime, we are underestimating them....
joy747, san,
you are darn right I'm hoping mad!! The best part is when I told her off for it, she just went like "oh". Not even 'sorry'..now i tolerate her for one more day. When my hubby is back from biz trip on monday we'll definitely goreng her together big time!!
for now, i'm making a list of all the wrongdoings..
you are darn right I'm hoping mad!! The best part is when I told her off for it, she just went like "oh". Not even 'sorry'..now i tolerate her for one more day. When my hubby is back from biz trip on monday we'll definitely goreng her together big time!!
for now, i'm making a list of all the wrongdoings..
Nellu, omg!! $60! faint. Waa... biang.. For my maid I was angry at 1st, but later tot no point being angry. Dinner time oso, normally she eats 1-2bowls of rice, last night she just took half bowl and kept the other half in fridge I told her, if she continues like this I will have to send her back to agent, cos I dun wan her fainting in the hse. Prev when she went on hunger strike, she look like going to faint. I was still telling her nicely, asking her what’s the matter and ask her to eat more.. Now no more!!, esp when Recently she starts to beat my bb again. (another long story). I didn’t even scold her, just pointed out to her which part she never clean well, she goes on hunger strike.. if I really scold her, I think she will jump out of the window. No point telling her off, now I am only waiting for replacement. She’s not suitable to be a maid at all. Now very headache, my washing machine is spoilt, the cooking hob cannot be use (I can’t even boil water). I really dun understand how she use those things, everything spoilt. I just change my vaccum (nw spoilt again, the power will goes off half way, she got the weirdest way of vaccuming. One leg press on the power switch, the other leg of the floor.. practicing modeling perhaps? ), washing pipe (now spoilt again), TV oso spoilt (will auto switch off). Everything she touches is spoilt.. even the iron oso . And I can’t even scold her.
Mrs Wang, if beginning is like that, dan really no pt trying her out.. cos the attitude doesn’t change one.
Joy747, yes I agree with you. Hb told me to monitor today. If she’s still like that will send her back to agent tomorrow.
Mrs Wang, if beginning is like that, dan really no pt trying her out.. cos the attitude doesn’t change one.
Joy747, yes I agree with you. Hb told me to monitor today. If she’s still like that will send her back to agent tomorrow.
Nellu,
Of cos your maid not sorry...they simply don't care! You are not allowed to deduct their salary BUT you can deduct their BONUS ie. she won't get one.
May,
Time for you to throw away your maid already. Why is she even still in your house if she is beating your baby? No need to monitor already. It's very clear you should give her one tight slap and send her off already.
Of cos your maid not sorry...they simply don't care! You are not allowed to deduct their salary BUT you can deduct their BONUS ie. she won't get one.
May,
Time for you to throw away your maid already. Why is she even still in your house if she is beating your baby? No need to monitor already. It's very clear you should give her one tight slap and send her off already.
mrs_wang
Member
Liana,
That day i wanna slap her already! I knew that she will not do anything abt it. My hubby gotta constrained me in the bathroom!
I still recalled my heart turned cold & heavy watching the video & had to control my emotions cos we were figuring out how to send her away asap.
May
If you seen the "signs" of yr maid abusing the kid. You really shd not keep her. I work from home everyday & occasionally leaves my baby gal wif my maid when i bring my boy out. So little chance for her alone wif my gal yet we manage to capture the video of her slapping my 3.5mth gal!
I really blame myself for this! I regretted being complacent when i see the signs of her impatience & unhappiness.
About the maid, the phone interview already put us off! Ive gotten a referral by my bro's indo maid. Coming after she renew her passport. This time i cross my fingers & toes that language is not a barrier. My ph maid can converse in english but she dun listen with her heart also no use. Im goin to get a bahasa-english dictionary to help communication with this indo maid.
That day i wanna slap her already! I knew that she will not do anything abt it. My hubby gotta constrained me in the bathroom!
I still recalled my heart turned cold & heavy watching the video & had to control my emotions cos we were figuring out how to send her away asap.
May
If you seen the "signs" of yr maid abusing the kid. You really shd not keep her. I work from home everyday & occasionally leaves my baby gal wif my maid when i bring my boy out. So little chance for her alone wif my gal yet we manage to capture the video of her slapping my 3.5mth gal!
I really blame myself for this! I regretted being complacent when i see the signs of her impatience & unhappiness.
About the maid, the phone interview already put us off! Ive gotten a referral by my bro's indo maid. Coming after she renew her passport. This time i cross my fingers & toes that language is not a barrier. My ph maid can converse in english but she dun listen with her heart also no use. Im goin to get a bahasa-english dictionary to help communication with this indo maid.
ladies,
it's damn farnie. When you dun want to see the faults of the maid, they keep popping in your face.
We were late for church and why? my maid'd rather change than pack the diaper bag! Somemore still can ask me if she should pack! i really felt like whacking her head with the huge crucifix in my home!!! Every sunday we do the same thing and yet she can ask me!!
then when in church, my boy wanted to walk around. so i told her to take him out for a while and try to coax him in again. They were out for a full 30mins. Didn't feel right so went off to look for them. Saw her just holding my boy's hands, him standing next to her and she chatting with another maid!!!! Very irritated! I didn't care if other people were looking i just stomped straight up to her, picked up my boy and said very sternly and quite loudly "I told you to take him out for a walk not to chit chat here!!" she still can answer me "the person's only asking me something" to which i totally ignored her...
Now I give her the cold shoulder all the way.
I was just thinking if she could forget her place and start to answer the questions my neighbour asked my mum. Then she could very well be talking and talking abt loads of other stuff to other people. Well, i'm not against her trying to bond with her fellow country women but then she had deliberately done all these things when I'm not around. So what does that mean??!
trying very very hard to tolerate until my hubby is back tomorrow morning...
it's damn farnie. When you dun want to see the faults of the maid, they keep popping in your face.
We were late for church and why? my maid'd rather change than pack the diaper bag! Somemore still can ask me if she should pack! i really felt like whacking her head with the huge crucifix in my home!!! Every sunday we do the same thing and yet she can ask me!!
then when in church, my boy wanted to walk around. so i told her to take him out for a while and try to coax him in again. They were out for a full 30mins. Didn't feel right so went off to look for them. Saw her just holding my boy's hands, him standing next to her and she chatting with another maid!!!! Very irritated! I didn't care if other people were looking i just stomped straight up to her, picked up my boy and said very sternly and quite loudly "I told you to take him out for a walk not to chit chat here!!" she still can answer me "the person's only asking me something" to which i totally ignored her...
Now I give her the cold shoulder all the way.
I was just thinking if she could forget her place and start to answer the questions my neighbour asked my mum. Then she could very well be talking and talking abt loads of other stuff to other people. Well, i'm not against her trying to bond with her fellow country women but then she had deliberately done all these things when I'm not around. So what does that mean??!
trying very very hard to tolerate until my hubby is back tomorrow morning...
Hi Liana/ Mrs Wang, I have no choice. sending her off would be my last resort.. cos my parents is going for short holiday coming week. Original plan was to get mil to come over to "oversee" while maid take care of bb. Mil have no experience with bb, even her own children is taken care by nanny until primary sch age. If i send her off nw, I would have to take leave to take care of my bb, which i cant due to work committment. UNLESS really no choice dan will have to send her back dan i really headache duno where to put bb. Currently as long as there's another person with her and bb, she doesnt dare to do anything. I will ask hb to ask MIL to stick to bb, even when maid is showering for bb, she must stand at the door to watch. AFter my parents come back from their holiday I will definely send her back.
Mrs Wang, hope u will have a good maid this round.. you certainly deserve one!
Mrs Wang, hope u will have a good maid this round.. you certainly deserve one!
b2b3m4
Same as u, after my maid left, we din get a replacement. FIL quitted his job to help MIL with the kids .. and i'm very grateful for my FIL's sacrifies .. As for our own home, hubby and me shared the household chores .. we become busier but happier .. we enjoyed the peace and privacy at home now .. ekkekeee
Same as u, after my maid left, we din get a replacement. FIL quitted his job to help MIL with the kids .. and i'm very grateful for my FIL's sacrifies .. As for our own home, hubby and me shared the household chores .. we become busier but happier .. we enjoyed the peace and privacy at home now .. ekkekeee
HAIZZZZ.... Mummies... I really want to collapse aldy.. My maid ran away this morning. Took my key, open the door and left the key on the lock. And guess what, when I bot my son to my mum's place, we saw red spots on his foot.. yes.. hfm just confirm by doc. Nw I dun have a maid to look after not 1 but 2 children and I got to separate the 2 of them. We ran all over SG since 6.30am looking for her this morning and finally at 10plus we found her at the agent. Her reason for running away? She cannot stand my son beating her. She even told the agent we stood by and do nothing while my son beat her.... Where is justice!!!! She beats my bb, nw complain my son beat her.. No justice at all... Nw I still got to pay her air ticket home.
celtricia, haiz.. learnt my lesson. Jus nw at the agency, I interview a transfer maid. She has 8mths working experience in SG. work 7 months with 1st employer, after that got trf to 2nd employer to take care of old grandfather, but grandfather pass away after 2weeks. Agent told me she's a very good worker, and the 2nd employer have written a good recomendation for her. Do you think I can take her??
May,
oh dear...poor you.
Take care...
on hindsight, it's always "aiyah, shouldn't have contemplated". But at that point, there's always so much other difficulties - where to put bb, cannot take leave etc, so dun send back yet. Not easy...
Focus on your kids for now....
oh dear...poor you.
Take care...
on hindsight, it's always "aiyah, shouldn't have contemplated". But at that point, there's always so much other difficulties - where to put bb, cannot take leave etc, so dun send back yet. Not easy...
Focus on your kids for now....
