Advise on Baby & Maid Exps

CSI_Fan, aiyo!!! Can get someone else to handle your EBM? I oso pump in office for like 7mths.. Everydrop is so precious.. Last time my mum help to take care of bb. Sometimes if bb cannot finish a feed, she will keep tell bb. This BM very precious, your mummy makes a lot of effort to pump for you. Cannot waste. Your maid really vomit blood.

SusanY, I get your point. If she can hide abt phonecard it means she can hide alot of things. Hb taught me this. Tell her sir doesn’t want her to hold a phonecard or hp. Cos she have to take care of bb. If you find anymore phonecard or hp with her no matter where / who its from you will just keep it until end of her contact. Just tell her, Sir is very angry!

Emma, You can set your own salary, but if its me I will increase her pay to $350 to reduce unhappiness btw the 2 maids.. Cos the 2 maid will sure discuss their salary. Your current maid will most likely be unhappy if she knows that she’s getting lower pay than a fresh maid. Maybe you can even tell her in advance that you are matching the pay with the new maid. Also mention that the new maid will be paying off her loan for the 1st 7-8mths but your maid no more loan. Just my 2 cents..

Hi Keyan, Wish you luck!!!
 


Hi May
I know what you mean, i also worried about that too. Now I find out that she might need to clean to two houses, one next to each other and her job is to take care of an elderly woman only. Maybe I can use that as a reason why her pay is higher.
 
Harlow ladies..

Kanna sai, tink ur reltv agent really tink u gd to 'chop' leh.. if i were u, i will not continue to take frm her liao..

Dymples.. ya lor.. contraceptives after tis #3 liao.. really BTH.. Oooo u staying at CCK ah.. haha.. yeah.. v near me.. LoL
trying hard not to b angry wif her.. so try to get hb to b the one scolding her lor..

nellu, i din leh.. sigh..hb find it v ma fan.. so in d end i din bother also.. we lazy mah.. heehee..

Susan, wah!! ur maid now daring liao ah.. sigh.. but bo bian leh, ur 2 kids under her care.. i noe ur difficulties.. *hugz*

CSI_Fan, thanks.. i totally understand ur situation.. when i gotten my 1st maid.. she threw away my xtra EBM TWICE tat i kept for my elder son.. so i noe ur feelings..

Anyway ladies, update update... hb booked a nite stay @ rasa sentosa ytd, but i decide agst bringing my maid along as it means more vomitting of blood den enjoyin.. so hb asked maid, 'u wan to stay hm alone or u wan go bak agent', she decided to go bak agent..heh.. so haf informed agent n told agent i might not wan to take her bak.. so am maidless again.. heehee.. though tougher, but beta den kept agitating myself.. coz nw both kids super gluey to me coz of #3, they also make me agitated easily.. n i dun nid another, to make it worst.. heh.. so will pack her bags myself n bring it to agent.. so haf to do maid hunting again, as the phil choosen another family n not me.. juz not meant to b lah i guess. sigh..
 
<font color="aa00aa">susany</font>,
Yup... know your concerns. Scared if little thing like this can hide then how about big thing next time. Btw, I like May's idea... tell her Sir is angry. Maids usually very afraid to get the Sir angry.

<font color="aa00aa">Emma</font>,
Yup. You can highlight to her that the other maid will be cleaning 2 houses that's why salary is higher. But monitor her behaviour after that... cos some maids... they dun care about the reasons behind the higher salary. All they know is that the other maid is being paid more $$$, then they start to become resentful and that's where all sorts of patterns come out.

<font color="aa00aa">Celtricia</font>,
Oh dear... sianz to start maid hunting again yah. But definately agree.. better to send back this lousy maid then always gotta keep "vomit blood" over her "stupid" mistakes. Wish you lots and lots of GOOD LUCK.
kao_babydust.gif
 
MOrning ladies!!

Dymples, yes lor.. sian lah.. but bo bian.. beta den to tahan tis current one.. Thanks for the lots n lots of GOOD LUCK..
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morning mummies!
wl never ever use relative agt anymore as there is no more free trsfr, even if there is, wl nvr ever use her too. she n her crap, bs n all her maids r shxx coz of such an agt lor! It is expensive too, S$ 688 &amp; anot S$ 300 &amp; insurance $ when we tk d siao ting tong myanmar maid, of course insurance $ agn for tis current fili maid. heng, she is hb relative, if it is mine, wl write her up in tamarind's blog!

susany, yr maid consider quite capable can mng yr bb n yr dd, i dun tink my current fili mother of 4 kids can mng tat, u gv her another chance leh but tell her no more hidings liao.

Dymples, haha, do chck tat yr maid dun eat d bird nest, my prev hiao fili ate d bird nest i mk for my kids X#$%&amp;?

CSI fan, reali veri careless, must repeat everiday to her leh, these maids reali veri forgetful. why dun u label d instructions of how to handle the EBM so tat she got no more excuses liao.

celtricia, go maid hunting agn, haiz good luck leh but lk what dymples said, bttr than renz n vomit blood, lk tat more siong. tk it as a break n d freedom to go/do anything wiz out maid!
 
Kanna sai, ya lor.. sianz but quite relieve of vomit blood.. hahaha.. though hse messier, but i find am much happier n dun feel restricted at hm lor.. when she's ard, i dread to go out of the living rm n c her face.. sigh..
 
celtricia, yes, haha vomit blood more siong than hse messier, u r rite, haha, u so cute, me too when d siao ting tong myanmar maid was ard, i so scared to go downst to see her face n dread to tok to her (coz her mouth veri smelli n hear her owhhhh), end up, me n kids couped upst most of d time, such a relieve rite? she now going back to indo or waiting for trsfr at agt leh?
 
Kanna sai, true mah.. told hb.. i dread saturday mornings.. though its suppose to b more relax for me.. in d end i din really relax at all.. hahaha.. u also ah... true lor.. aws cope in rm super sian.. own hse still can't walk ard freely.. haiz..
eh.. i haven't speak to agent yet.. but most likely she's gonna b trf out liao..
 
celtricia, ya lor vomit blood + fear + loss of $$, sian rite, u got to pay all over d insurance $$ agn n d stress of going thru biodatas/intv, sian, slowli lk n arrg for new one to come aft yr hols ma, so no nn to park d maid elsewhere ma.
 
Kanna sai, ya lor.. i agree.. but i will choose 1 nw if i haf, den mum say let new one stay over at her plc while we go hols so she can train her.. easier for me..

guess wat.. juz called agent, agent say maid told her we v nice employers.. wan to wrk for us.. WTH!! i told agent i cfm not taking her bak.. not worth my health n bb..
 
celtricia, icic, lk tat bttr if yr mum can help to train while u go hols ... ya lor, unappreciate maid, can say emply veri nice to her but dunno how to reciprocrate juz lk my prev siao ting tong myanmar maid lor. bttr dun tk her back, not good for u n bb yes, if u wan to tk fili, try to tk soon liao coz xmas coming, ltr agt says no maids.
 
kanna sai, ya lor.. at least got mum.. sigh.. tis maid hor..i told agent.. we gd, but she no initiative to learn n remember, also no use wat.. we gd to her coz most tings wif my children we do mah.. n she do minimal nia.. kaoz.. as for phil, duno leh.. so far agent no biodata for phil.. got 1 ex-sin but i duno wan to take or not..
 
celtricia, u r rite, haiz nowadays, maids juz nvr bother to try haiz, ex sin if good okie, if no good, they know d inside out liao oso cham, but ex sin they usuali wan off days leh.
 
celtricia, no off days, how many yrs in sin? yes fresh or experience maids depends on each indiv n oso our luck, we juz pray hard, i bumped into one of my nb d other day, he asked me chgd maid agn huh (he dun hv maid), he said must b i nvr pray hard enuf, haiz prayed veri hard liao, but den wat to do, qualiti of maids nowadays down d road ... what a slow moving monday, seems onli 2 of us online leh.
 
celtricia,
I won't believe the agent leh..ref the no off day...
all agents always say "our maids are told no hp allowed" oh ya right!

my maid ah, told her no hp allowed, but still brought over! damn sian already when I collected her at agent and agent handed the hp over to me. Luckily the maid still ok to let us keep the phone and never ask to let her use.
 
Kanna sai, ya.. no off days.. her salary is $380 liao.. incld in the no off day pay liao.. she in sg frm 2004-2007 den 2007-2008, 1st employer chinese family stay in 4rm flat wif 3 kids but age (13,11,8), 2nd employer tink its a sikh stay in bungalow no kids but take care of dogs.. (hmm indo can touch dogs meh?)

ur nb so funny, say u din pray hard enuff.. sigh.. its every employers woes when they nid a maid.. sigh..

nellu, ya.. really no off day.. cfm.. but hp wise i duno lah.. i will also make sure she dun haf hp.. if haf i will keep.. heh..
 
<font color="aa00aa">celtricia</font>,
wah... your that old maid can still say you all good employers. Then she dun treasure... keep making stupid mistakes. This type really feel like "strangling" her man.
Slowly take your time and interview lotsa maids. No point rushing into this cos so costly for us to keep changing maids... all the agt fees, insurance, etc... plus on top of that..
if kena lousy maid again.. sure faintz on spot liaoz.

About no off days... this agt may not allow off days.. but if the maid is ex-Sin, then after some time she will sure bring this subject up onez.
All phil maids especially ex-SG always want off days. If they dun get their way... stupid patterns come out.
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<font color="aa00aa">kannasai</font>,
Yah man.. gotta monitor my maid and make sure she dun eat my bird's nest. hahahah... maybe I should start numbering my containers. *lol*
1766911.gif
 
Dymples..
ya lor.. juz dun understand tis maid at all.. no brains i tink.. LoL.. opps.. =X
now no maids to interview, haf to wait till 14 oct if i wan.. so i c hw first lor.. i also told hb i dun wan rush into tings liao.. damn sian.. den if i take another nw its my 3rd maid for the yr.. kaoz..

tis maid is indo leh.. so duno if later will demand off day.. so i will haf an agreement to state 1 more time no off days n no hp if i really take her..
 
celtricia, she indo ha n salary S$ 380 - quite high for indo leh, 2007 - 2008, nvr finish ctr huh? nvr tk care of young kids b4, may not be able to cope but den depends on d attitude lor, tk yr time to choose/intv la coz rushed if not suitable, loss of $$/vomit blood agn, sian. ya lor, tis ppl who dun nn to hv maid wl nvr underst haiz ...

dymples, u must chck yr slow cooker pot when cooking tat time coz my prev hiao fili scooped up into her cup/den add water, she tink i stxxxd dunno, i warned her 1st time, 2nd time, i caught her in d act! initially, when she saw me preparing myself, she asked me wat is tat for n i told her for complexion &amp; health haiz ... so if yr maid ask u what is tat for hor, u tell her onli for pregn woman n not meant for not pregn woman hor!
 
Kanna sai, ya.. her salary consider high leh.. i agree also.. the 2007 - 2008 only 1.5yrs leh.. so i also wan to noe y din finish contract.. heh.. nvr tk care young kids b4, she is a widow wif 3 kids.. but in her bio.. whh duno hw true, states gd at taking care of nb, bbs, toddlers..
 
celtricia, ask agt for more bios to choose fm/compare bef u decide leh, for me i wl not tk those who nvr finish ctr lor no mttr what was d reasons gvn. dun decide on onli 1 bio leh. my 1st fili ex sin/hkg, nvr tk care of kids bef, wk out for me n she oso gd wiz kids, so it depends on each indiv n our luck lor.
 
Kanna sai, ya lor.. i noe.. but they dun haf phil ones also.. sigh.. so i haf to wait for more bio on 14 oct.. at the moment i check bak wif my prev agent c wat she has lor.. sian leh..
 
<font color="aa00aa">Celtricia</font>,
Wah... $380 for Indon is on high side leh. Also she no experience with children... scared she no patience with them or she may be those who prefer to do housework only.
Oh dear... 3rd maid liaoz. Yes yes.. must choose carefully liaoz. Dun wanna have to take the stupid test by MOM lah. Lagi waste of time man.
And the worse part is not like it's our fault lah... blame it on lousy maids who dun treasure good employers.

<font color="aa00aa">kannasai</font>,
Wah seh! Your that fili maid really can man! *aarrgghh*. Ok ok... will definately keep an eye on the slow cooker liaoz.
hahahhaah... good idea. Tell the maid it's only for preggie woman. Cannot anyhow makan.
 
mummies...

didn't log in the past few days....

Yup, thanks for sharing my heartache over my EBM...hb says I over-reacted. Oh well, he doesn't fully understand how much hard work goes into pumping.
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I've actually been portioning out my EBM for each day's feed (milk feed plus that to mix into cereal). And this maid still can get it wrong (she used my freshly pumped EBM to mix with the cereals - the volume was obviously much more than those that I usually portion out for each meal. Then can ask me how come cereals so watery this round. And throw away remainder). My father's maid and the previous one can handle it leh...haiz. So anyway, I've also done what some of you suggested...written out instructions (super specific until I feel pai seh, coz have to regard this person as an idiot...but strangely, she's happier with the specific instructions...haha. I guess that's her style of learning.) and stuck them to the fridge and the cooler bag used to transport the EBM. And have gotten my father's maid to help guide her too. hehs...hopefully no more such incidents anymore.

celtricia,
wow, that's a good way to send the maid back...good thing she opted to stay at agency. heehee...makes things easier.
 
csi,
i found that giving very super specific instructions to the T works best. then they cannot question you or anything.

my hubby always says that this is the only way which will work for them cos they all left their brains back home somewhere!
 
DYmples, ya lor.. her pay super high.. c hw lah.... will c other bios first den decide

CSI Fan, ya lor.. i agree but tml bringing her stuff to agent there.. dun wish to c her leh.. hb also.. scared she get all too emotional n we can't handle..
 
morning mummies, i got a shock of my life when i went home yday n saw d maid washing d water heater with water, oh my oh my, i told her when she 1st came oredi tat water heater can not wash with water, only wipe with cloth. She den explained to me tat d maid at d agent hse tot her to do so, d maid there tot her to spray hot water on the water heater and wash d toilet. this maid tot her to do all d hsewk &amp; etc b4 she was picked up by d new emply.

Guess wat ... who is tat maid ... my siao ting tong myanmar maid! I specified to d relative agent tat not to let my new fili maid see d siao ting tong myanmar maid n she said yes of course no, she wl nvr ever do tat ... not onli she did tat but asked d siao ting tong myanmar maid to teach my new fili maid for 3 days ... she has won d maid agency of d yr award, X#$@%^? mummies, nvr trust tis agt n nvr use her ... despicable, worst agent! n i dunno that a myanmar maid can be such vicious! Besides teaching tat, d siao ting tong myanmar maid oso tot a lot of wrong things to my new fili maid.

Mummies, do u tink i shud call up my relative agt n ask her abt tis?
 
Kanna sai, i seriously tink ur reltv agent is too much.. u shld really call her up n qns her abt tis.. she is putting disadvantage to u with the way she handles the maid..
 
kanna sai

dont bother to call them...they will just entertain you with all their excuses...forget about them and move on and do not use your relative agent anymore.No point getting angry with them
 
Hi all

Was chatting with a gal friend regarding indo maid vs filipino.She told me she will never take indo as they are too complex.

She would rather take fresh educated filipino as
she worked with them like in a coporate world. She will set the workplan for her, make her report to her whole thing events when madam having dinner at home.

Every month before salary time, she will do appraisal for her and set a bench mark for her to see how much she has accomplished.

It works well for her last six years filipino maid.Now she is training another one. She takes managing maid a challenge for herself.

Anyone did the same thing?
 
Oh yes, she finds indo maid character very complex and very hard for them to understand.Just like its very hard to teach a cow how to sing, as by nature, they cannot sing, so no matter what incentive, bonus, values you try to impart, revese pysco,all will not work.

This happens to me. Am able to pysco little kids to study hard, an ah lian to get a degree eventually but not an indo maid not to throw money, letters behind my yard with maid next door...see this is the difference.They are just cannot be taught and mould .
 
Joy747, wow!!! it will take lots of effort to b doing tat.. i guess if we wan results tat's the way we shld do it.. but to physco little kids to study??? hmm.. teach me leh.. hahaha..
 
celtricia

With little kids, you need to have lots and tons of patience but you must behind support them as they are still young, as parents, we are responsible in helping them to lay a good foundation.Bottom line, guide them and helps them to see "things' that they are not able to see at this tender age.
 
Joy747,
hmm.. duno leh.. use to haf lots of patience.. but nw.. patience level down to zero.. sigh.. nw my son, though he's only coming to 3yrs old, he refuse to go even to playgrp.. duno wat happen, despite our continuous questioning... duno wat will happen when we put him in full day cc wif his N2 classes..
 
hi mummies
I renew my maid contract without the agent, I just deal with NTUC to help with the insurance and work permit. Do i need to draft a contract or agreement myself?
 
celtricia,
here here...not everyone gone lah.
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joy747,
my hubby and I are using this method to manage my maid now. I find it easier and less taxing as I dun need to bother abt her personal life so much. We were very upfront with her right from day one and set the tone that she is merely an employee. The treatment she'll get from us will be fair and firm and that it'll be like how it is if she worked in a corporate ofc. She understood straight away because she worked in Ph before in call centre and other admin positions (all not long term).

not foolproof plan...on and off will still have hiccups but at least got some 'system; to fall back on.
 
nellu.. Oooo u here.. dymples, kanna sai.. all MIA leh.. sigh.. i super sian.. still waiting for another agent to fax phil biodatas over.. hope got gd ones.. heh..
 
Joy747,
I quite like ur fren's approach. It will also help us manage staff and colleagues in ofc. hehs.

Over the weekend, I was talking to BIL and SIL when we met up at MIL's place. BIL and SIL said they will never take Phil maids coz Phil maids cannot "use thumb to press down" (literal translation from Chinese). They want Indo maids coz they feel that Indo maids easier to "press down". (hope you all understand what they are saying here). While I agree that we all should be able to control the maids to some extent...but to want to "press down" on them, the thought just doesn't sit well with me...
 
oops!
that's me (the above post is by me)...CSI_Fan.

using my sis computer (am still on leave today to train the maid). Aiyoh. used wrong nick. hahaha...
 
wor...CSI, trying to cause confusion here ah! hehehe

how's the maid now? still gong or not?

eh i agree with you on the press down attitude. You know hor, my MiL's fren in Msia likes to do that lor. and last time she was going on and on saying why we so nice to our 2nd maid. Actually we were not that nice, but mil's fren dunno that I fed up abt making the maid do things (cos always do wrongly or got some stupid attitude!). Very bad leh this attitude of absolute control. I think it'll just make everyone go crazy!
 
hahaha...nellu, pai seh...didn't realise the computer keeps the last username - I think it's for the user, makes it easier for user, instead of having to key in each time...then my sister just joined the forum...hahaha...I also confused. hehs.

Thanks for asking...
happy.gif
The maid so far, ok. Not so gong. Actually, putting down instructions to a T also helps me ensure that I've got everything down properly also. But of course, some things, it's need common sense one lah...but so far, she's going ok. Just that my baby doesn't like her to carry her to sleep. Probably it's coz this maid has the habit of jumping while trying to rock baby to sleep. I was surprised, when I saw her "dancing" in the room, in her attempt to rock my gal to sleep. Maybe that's why my gal doesn't like her to put her to bed...but the maid's been doing that for her own son, it's a bit tough for her to suddenly not do it. Just have to keep reminding...otherwise, my poor gal...getting giddy...

I agree...this attitude of absolute control is bad. And when we brought our maids (past and present) out with them, hb and I will surely kena from MIL, BIL, SIL...on how to treat the maids "right". Till we don't feel like bringing the maid out to MIL's place anymore. And if we don't bring maid out, I'm sure we'll kena also - why don't bring maid? Must bring maid, so we can enjoy...etc. And MIL tends to want to scold my maid in front of us. I can't stand that...coz (a) MIL is not there to supervise during the weekdays. If my maid cannot take it, she can take it out on my baby...and nobody will know. Dangerous mah. Whereas MIL is always with BIL's 2 maids, so she can scold them...,;(b) it's my maid, so any telling off should be done by me or hb, isn't it. Haiz...ILs. hehs...

yes, sometimes we need to put them back in their "place"...but I guess must see the character of the maid also. Some maids perform better if they are not treated like that. Some perform better under tight control.
 
wahaha.. confusion leh.. nw somemore the weather so nice for me to zzzzzzz.. too bad am at wrk.. if not i won't b online liao.. heh..

juz share someting i found when i pack my maid's bag ytd.. found some letters attn to me for apology in broken english.. can't really make up wat she try to say.. n found my wedding favor, whh is a pocket calendar wif my wedding pic in front in her wallet.. not ONE but TWO... tat make hb more determined tat i muz check every little detail of her belongings.. can't imagine wat she's trying to do wif it.. scary..

btw, u ladies were saying put down instructions to the T.. like hw? can share an example?
 
Alamak, your relative agent really lously. Doesn’t treat you as relative at all. My fren went to her relative and got a really good maid.

CSI_fan, where is ur new maid from? Haha.. I remember last time I oso ‘dance’ around to make my bb sleep.. My IL very different from yours. Last weekend, we were talking about the runaway maid(2nd myanmar maid) who beat my baby. Than my fil says the 1st myanmar maid oso slap my baby. HE SAW but NV Said a thing!!! I was so shocked!!

Celtricia, OMG! Ur maid from indo right?? My bro’s maid told them hor, indo maid in SG 40% of them will know how to do black magic on employer, so they cant see their mistake…
 
<font color="ff6000">Good Morning Ladies...</font>

<font color="aa00aa">CSI fan</font>,
Yah... better to write the instructions down explicitly. Then no room for the maid to say dunno what to do with your EBM. *aarrgghh* how can throw away the "excess" EBM!! *strangle her*

<font color="aa00aa">kannasai</font>,
Wah pianz!! Your that reltv agt really terrible! Despite your specific instructions, she still allow your old siao ting tong maid to interact (worse still... teach) your new maid her nonsense!! *incorrigible* What is the agt name? Can PM me? Then next time I can boycott such horrible agency.

<font color="aa00aa">Joy747</font>,
I like the way you handle your maid... corporate style. But then also lots of hard work needed on your part yah... like doing monthly appraisals. Me admire you for doing it. Me only praise the maid now and then when she do things correctly, or else will tell her off firmly when she do things wrongly. Will definately try to do things your style. hehehhehe... But I definately dun agree with your BIL's style of "thumbing down" the maid. Should not control a human being in such a manner. So degrading. They still got feelings lor.
 
May, ya.. maid is frm indo.. not village kind some more.. OMG!! 40% of them ah.. so many.. scary.. but i still manage to c her mistakes leh.. hopefully she did noting to tat extend during her stay wif us.. gd ting i send her bak liao.. heh..
 
<font color="aa00aa">CSI fan</font>,
I also dun like scolding maids (especially outside) where possible. Cos they looking after our kids when no one is home... then scared they take out their frustrations on the children. My mom also used to do this till I told her off! I said :" now you scold the maid, later she not happy... ill treat your grand-daughters how? You wanna be responsible?" Sometimes to these old folks being able to scold the maids (in public) is kinda like "showing-off" lor.

<font color="aa00aa">celtricia</font>,
Eeeks!! Scary leh... that your maid has your wedding picture. Dunno what intentions she has... only hope it's not something malicious.

<font color="aa00aa">May</font>,
Aiyoh... my current maid also Indon... now you write about them using black magic I also scared. But then hor... some fili's also know how to do black magic. My ex-fili maid told me there's a region super well-known for doing such magic. Tink one of the ladies here also mentioned about it before.
 


Dymples.. ya lor.. coz we still haf a box of it in our living rm whh we left to display n give it to frens whom we din invite or yet to noe during tat time.. guess she conveniently took 2 lor.. i tink liao also scared.. so gd ting i check all her tings b4 packing.. at first was still considering if i shld or not..
 
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