Advice needed - My husband is having affair with a China Woman

[blueblur]

which MP did u see?

it's a very stupid remarks to make. If MOM officer do this based on favour, isn't it very easy for them to take bride?

 

[nevernever]

What she meant is MOM will not give black & white, they want to protect themselves. Don't want to be challenged by any individual. Even you got evidence, it's not their business to blacklist any individual, you go sort out your marital woes. She said no point pursue the matter with MOM. If they help is quietly help, won't disclose to you. It makes me feel like I don't belong to this family of Singapore, don't family members suppose to help one another in distress? Bet I'm too naive. This foreign slut can do as she will, build her wealth, happiness upon my family. She is a S'pore PR and new citizen hopeful, welcome with open arms.

 

[blueblur]

yes, that i heard before. even if they blacklist her, they will not tell u.

From what i know, PR does not come under the jussdiction of MOM, should be under ICA. Anyway, recently i read that if PR caused disharmony or not behaving, their PR can be taken away also.

 

[nevernever]

These so call "foreign talents" are breaking up so many families, is the govt going to anything abt it, from what the MP spoken to me, its not the MOM biz, then who can look into this matter? Isnt MP suppose to be the voice of the people? I am already telling my gals its not necessary to get married in future, just be happy with own choice and take care of yourself. How to raise birth rate if this carry on? Women are mostly the ones to pick up the pieces and suffer the most. Is the govt turning a blind eye? Do we need that many KTV and hostesses to boost economy? Of course I know I need to settle the marital issue with THE HUSBAND, but these are 2 different issues. To divorce/reconcile with him is one and to pin the hm wrecker and blacklist her is another, I still want justice done.

 

[KitKatBreak]

Isn't there anything that we can do to stop those PRC from coming Singapore? They come in to Singapore through all means with all sorts of passes... As long as they have the money to pay for the passes and there they are in Singapore. I have even come across websites in China helping them to get phantom permits or fake educational certificates to come Singapore.

 

[shinco]

Seriously,there is nothing we can do.. I know how u feel.. I was there.. Sigh..
These bloody PRC are really good! I've ever seen their msg.. Then I realized the reason why man get hooked by them easily.. They are really good with their words!! They are so sweet.. Seriously,can make me puke!!

 

[wendy_reborn]

mary, if they are working in ktv, u can get evidence against them and blacklist them

 

[taitai]

There is nothing you can do except to complain in this forum.

Unless, all sign petition or go to Speakers' Corner and stage the displeasure. Ha!

PRCs not only work in KTVs, they are everywhere, online, sex forums offering their services. How can you stop them?

They are easy access to all the hungry desperate men here.

 

[shinco]

Taitai,you are so right!!! Just imagine,they can tell a guy that I doubt u n me will even want to look or take a sec glance that he looks like a korean!!! ((Faint))

 

[taitai]

So ... they are here to stay.

Which men wanna throw them out? Who dare to protest, report them?

I have tried in my own capacity to write to the SPF and AWARE, but no favourable reply.

Seem that they are not here to help. So, I only hope that more men get caught, like those 50 over men who got caught with having sex with an under-aged prostitute from an online sex syndicate.

Which brings me to think, why the authorities are not doing anything to bring down other sex forums who are blatantly solicting sex online?

 

[jenbabe]

in this case, i would dare say the govt is a bunch of useless crappy ppl.

 

[taitai]

Last time, I thought of advocating a rally to get rid of these unlicenced prostitutes but was discouraged by some forumers here, as well as a couple of men in disguise.

Well, it's not going succeed instantly, at least we made ourselves heard, correct?

Complaining here, brings you nowhere except more miseries.

 

[toblerone]

Mary (nevernever),October 21, 2012 - 1:25 pm
These so call "foreign talents" are breaking up so many families, is the govt going to anything abt it, from what the MP spoken to me, its not the MOM biz, then who can look into this matter? Isnt MP suppose to be the voice of the people? I am already telling my gals its not necessary to get married in future, just be happy with own choice and take care of yourself. How to raise birth rate if this carry on? Women are mostly the ones to pick up the pieces and suffer the most.

You should know which party to vote in coming Year 2016 GE! Right?

Mary (nevernever),October 21, 2012 - 1:25 pm
Is the govt turning a blind eye? Do we need that many KTV and hostesses to boost economy? Of course I know I need to settle the marital issue with THE HUSBAND, but these are 2 different issues. To divorce/reconcile with him is one and to pin the hm wrecker and blacklist her is another, I still want justice done.

Alot of people are angry and upset with Government too.

 

[toblerone]

Michilin (michilin),May 13, 2013 - 10:54 pm
Isn't there anything that we can do to stop those PRC from coming Singapore? They come in to Singapore through all means with all sorts of passes... As long as they have the money to pay for the passes and there they are in Singapore.

I agree with your post.

Many P.R.C. applied for student visa, and Singapore Government happily granted them. All they have to do is, pay the school fees and the school will auto-renew their student's visa.

Singapore wants to be 'Number One'. Sadly, lots of true blue Singaporeans were sacrificed.

An example of 'fighting for 'Number One' in worldwide education'

If you were closely examine primary, secondary, jc, and/or tertiary students' overall grading performance, the common top scorers are Mainlander Chinese! NUS, NTU and SMU can't afford to loose its top university ranking and they need foreigners (especially, Mainlander Chinese, Indonesians, Indians, Burmese) to maintain their university's standard in order to be 'Number One'in world class education status. Not only that, our honourable PM Lee H L recently "discouraged" local Polytechnic graduates from entering local Universities.

Before I forget. there are lost count of P.R.C. men providing "extra service" for men. To be honest, many married men nowadays involved with men. I knew a married man filed for divorce because he wanted to be with his boyfriend.

 

[toblerone]

sha (suspicion),May 14, 2013 - 9:24 am
mary, if they are working in ktv, u can get evidence against them and blacklist them

Good suggestion!

In fact, I have mentioned in my post dated April 30 2013 - 7:28 pm

 

[toblerone]

Bek (shinco),May 14, 2013 - 9:04 am
These bloody PRC are really good! I've ever seen their msg.. Then I realized the reason why man get hooked by them easily.. They are really good with their words!! They are so sweet.. Seriously,can make me puke!!

Now, then you know.

中国女人穿着风骚（有胸沟，露“事业线”）、挑逗撒娇厉害嘛...

男人没有定力会被“钩”走的。

 

[KitKatBreak]

Sha, what sort of evidence can be used to blacklist those PRC?

 

[angst]

I am one of the victims of prc woman as well. Very disheartened to know that man can just easily walk off 10 overs years of marriage once gotten involved with someone 15 yrs younger. No amount of words or reasoning can bring him to his senses. All I get is lies after lies. Really dunno what these women have been feeding them to manipulate them in this way. Can you imagine that a 40 yo man is so afraid of offending the prc bitch that he actually obediently report to her by sendg photos of himself and where he is? As if she's the wife and he's a husband caught cheating.And after reading all the vicious txt msgs that she sent to me, he can still continue to wine n dine with her ? What's most frustrating is, the man never even apologise and chose to remain silent throughout the past few months since this was exposed. For those with similar encounters, is this normal reaction from the men?

I am based in china and from my observations of couples walkg on the street and parents of my kids as well as feedback from friends, many of those families have a prc mother and and the fathers are foreigners like angmos, sporeans, msians... Sad

 

[KitKatBreak]

They feel that their men back home is not good enough for them that's why they go for men from other countries. A few years back when I was working in China then, I went to the disco there with a bunch of colleague with most of them angmohs. I was chatting with a male colleague who was an angmoh, then came a PRC who came over and push me away. That kind of hungry for man attitude, make me want to puke...

 

[sundaymorning]

i think its all their culture that makes them as who they are , pretty disgusted with the influx of PRC .

 

[judy_lsk]

To be fair, not all PRC women are the same. I have many ex. china colleagues whom I got to know them in a factory where they worked as operators. Most of them are proper, simple & nice women with good moral values & we even became close frds. Out of 10, only one of them is after $. So just wanna point out not all are like that. I even think that more & more Singaporean ladies are getting materialistic. (Man with no car, pls dun bother to go after them) I heard of this very often.

 

[moorspa7]

I agree with what Jolyon wrote, Singaporeans should know who to vote for in GE 2016. Our govt has already decided to increase population to 6.9 million by 2030 despite so much opposition to it in the hong lim rally. Make yr voices heard through voting, writing to any organization or the govt agencies will not help in the current situation. We need more opposition parties in the parliament to make our voices heard and have the power to implement change of policies. Are you willing to give them the power to do that for you?

It is not the fault of the PRCs that are breaking the families, it is our govt which has opened the doors so widely and let them in and give them a chance to do that. Look at the increased population of PRCs in singapore, who let them in? Ask yrself.

My marriage was damaged due to PRC prostitutes, however, I didn't blame them but my husband. He was the one who chose to betray me cos he can't deal with the difficulties in the marriage. To me, those men who choose to seek pleasures in other women without solving the problems in their marriage are losers. Complaining here will not solve problems but increases the negativity in yrself. They are here to earn a living, unfortunately, some choose unorthodox ways to do it.

 

[KitKatBreak]

Well, I managed to get the passport number of the PRC. So how to check the sort of pass she is holding?

 

[taitai]

You can contact ICA. If you are very sure that she is upto no good here, breakup your family. Make a complaint, and see how she die.

 

[toblerone]

Sh (angst) May 21, 2013 - 7:48 pm
I am based in china and from my observations of couples walkg on the street and parents of my kids as well as feedback from friends, many of those families have a prc mother and and the fathers are foreigners like angmos, sporeans, msians... Sad

Quite true.

​

Phyllis Quek one typical example (except she is not PRC but SPG).

​

郭妃丽天生孤僻、感情路波折多、喜爱物质享受多。八字中无见官杀，花姐命，难怪得拖到40岁才办婚嫁。

 

[toblerone]

what sort of evidence can be used to blacklist those PRC?

Well, I managed to get the passport number of the PRC. So how to check the sort of pass she is holding?

Answering to your question, I am afraid any authority (including ICA) will entertain such request.

Writing to ICA is a good option and it is case by case basis. ICA will not reveal and may "lie" to you about your case but that does not mean they do not look into the matter.

The action taken by ICA is discreet and not oblige to disclose anything.

For ICA to blacklist a person (s/he must be non S'pore Citizen and not S'pore P.R.) from re/entering Singapore, s/he must commit a crime either in his/her own country or in Singapore. Therefore, facing repatriation is almost guaranteed.

However, ICA is still able to turn down P.R application or shorten his/her stay upon entry to Singapore. Indirectly, hindering work permit application. So, ICA need cooperation from you, so that they are able to take neccessary action. Provide good reasons inorder to convince ICA to penalise the subject, thus refraining him/her from obtaining Singapore permanent residency.


Below are the useful information needed while filing with ICA:
1) subject's FIN Number (a photocopy if possible. Without FIN number is hard to trace)
2) subject's passport number (a photocopy if possible)
3) genuine identity (a photocopy of husband's and wife's identity card)
4) your MP's letter (it not MP's letter writing to ICA. It could be a housing or utilities dispute letter given by MP)
5) letter (with evidence)

One good thing is, husband/boyfriend/fiance acting as future 'sponsor' for any PR application may be marked. Rest of it, let the Government handle。

看到强奸通缉犯就得报警，总不能拿把大菜刀硬硬要劈死他吧？向ICA投诉/举报也是如此，该有合法途径解决。

若小三真的破坏家庭，可以尝试以上所写的是合法程序。该做的都做了，不必再操心，交由上天安排。

 

[toblerone]

i think its all their culture that makes them as who they are , pretty disgusted with the influx of PRC.

Good that you are aware.

 

[toblerone]

To be fair, not all PRC women are the same. I have many ex. china colleagues whom I got to know them in a factory where they worked as operators. Most of them are proper, simple & nice women with good moral values & we even became close frds. Out of 10, only one of them is after $. So just wanna point out not all are like that.

没错，有好有坏。

Unfortunately, seems never ending cases involving with PRC women.

I even think that more & more Singaporean ladies are getting materialistic. (Man with no car, pls dun bother to go after them) I heard of this very often.

Very true!

 

[toblerone]

I agree with what Jolyon wrote, Singaporeans should know who to vote for in GE 2016. Our govt has already decided to increase population to 6.9 million by 2030 despite so much opposition to it in the hong lim rally. Make yr voices heard through voting,

Most Singaporeans are unhappy.

The only legal way to scrap the White Paper is to overturn the Gov't in the future election.

We need more opposition parties in the parliament to make our voices heard and have the power to implement change of policies. Are you willing to give them the power to do that for you?

Fantastic!

It is not the fault of the PRCs that are breaking the families, it is our govt which has opened the doors so widely and let them in and give them a chance to do that. Look at the increased population of PRCs in singapore, who let them in? Ask yrself.

Very true. Gov't's bad policies. In fact, Gov't admitted they made mistakes.

Believe it or not, Singapore is the only country in the whole world giving free P.R. like water. Gov't has given huge enormous number of permanent residency in the past and they are still issuing P.R. despite protests.

Still, there are people who do not deserve to have P.R. but Singapore value them as economic pillars.

Singapore Gov't happily absorbed these foreigners (ranging in chronological order) in the recent years:
1. Chinese Mainlander
2. Pinoys (a.k.a. filipino/filipina from the Philippines)
3. Vietnamese (typically husband marrying Vietnamese)
4. Indonesians (big quota for Indonesian Chinese)
5. Burmese
6. Caucasians
7. Indian Nationals

Singapore Gov't at one time absorbed Hong Kees (those from Hong Kong) before 1997. That was the time, HDB and housing properties market got out of control which was caused by Hong Kees. From then on, Singaporeans' fixed value asset (housing) never get better but worse. It is obviously not citizen's fault.

My marriage was damaged due to PRC prostitutes, however, I didn't blame them but my husband. He was the one who chose to betray me cos he can't deal with the difficulties in the marriage. To me, those men who choose to seek pleasures in other women without solving the problems in their marriage are losers.

分析的很清楚，知道对或错之分。

Complaining here will not solve problems but increases the negativity in yrself. They are here to earn a living, unfortunately, some choose unorthodox ways to do it.

妇女发牢骚无可厚非，也可以泄泄气。互相安慰对方，没有什么不好。

 

[toblerone]

Complaining here will not solve problems but increases the negativity in yrself.

说的很好！

胡思乱想对自己的日子不好过。这又何必呢？慢慢看开，慢慢放下。

整天一直想坏的，怒气难消，自己无形产生负面磁场，做起事来不顺心也会处处碰钉子。那些沉迷女色或被情色所困，满脑肮脏、邪淫忘本入侵大脑，<u>将死得更快</u>。因为磁场直接是负（negative aura），做很多事会遇到麻烦。

不少佛教团体在Vesak Day有举办三步一拜（参加免费!），何不做点有意义的事呢? 趁机会消掉负面磁场! 我倒鼓励任何人去参加，才一年一次罢了。

‘三步一拜’是学佛修行法门之一，意义甚多...

一. 培养低声下气,消除慢贡高心。
二. 接引初机学佛的行者,由浅入深之要阶,以熏习善根成熟故。
三. 渐渐净化无明习气,智慧渐增。
四. 步步由黑暗转向光明佛道,心心由迷得悟。
五. 步步礼佛,心地可得柔软心、大悲心、大愿心、大智慧心、忏悔心、同时灭刚强心、高傲心、残酷心、独善之心、无惭愧心、愚痴心转化光明智慧。

 

[moorspa7]

Jolyon,

There is nothing wrong to complain to vent out. However, complaining can be constructive to find a solution, if you are complaining to the right person. To me, I feel complaining on the PRCs is useless, short term is ok. Long term complaining is killing oneself. I say this cos I hv been there and done that, therefore I stop complaining. I hv lost my health due to emotional stress for the past 3 yrs, and I am trying to recover. Emotional stress is the most detrimental to one's health when it becomes chronic, I hv reached the bottom and I am climbing up slowly. Peace is what I want most, more than happiness as it helps me to recover.

I feel sadden when I read more and more stories of wives being betrayed, it is really getting worse in Singapore. Many years ago, the forum was not filled with a lot of betrayal threads caused by PRCs. My hope is for Singaporeans to wake up and stop giving our govt the absolute power to rule Singapore. We need change, more than ever now for the sake of ourselves and our children's future. I am sick of the govt's empty promises, and not listening to Singapore citizens. They are no longer serving the people but satisfying their greed. I know too well why they are allowing so many foreign workers in Singapore, it is all abt revenue.

 

[taitai]

I agree with moorspa on our political screen.

However, how many abled people can stand up as opposition. I am not giving my vote to any tom dick or harry just to spite the current government. It could turn Spore to shit.

How many Slyvia Lim and Low Tia Kiang are there in Singapore. They are devoted, passionate, they here to hear us commoners out, they are on the ground, they feel us. How many are out there like them?

There are some opposition parties who are here to make a din, for their own personal revenge and agenda. Not for the people. Just beware.

 

[moorspa7]

That is why the worker's party is gaining more support now. They need more support from people so that they can reach out to other areas instead of the east. It is better to hv 2 different parties than 1 party in the parliament. Singapore is already in the shit. Singaporeans are still afraid of change, even though worker party has contested in more areas, they still don't hv enough votes to put them in the parliament. Don't forget the majority who work in govt sectors, do they hv the guts to vote for change? There are people who still prefer to be in the comfort zone, how united are Singaporeans? For one thing I know, the younger generation are not naive n believe in the govt words easily. Change may come years later and not in the near future. People still fall for the same old govt's tactics when election is near, but all they get is empty promises in the next 5 yrs.

Another thing when the workers party won the Aljunied GRC, they hv to set up the town council from scratch. There is unfair treatment towards opposition party, they make things difficult for opposition party. It is not easy to survive in Singapore as an opposition party.

 

[taitai]

Yes. But recruitment is a big issue for the WP. Its not ez to recruit good calibre young pple into their party.

Do you know slyvia lim's background? How many of such high calibre people who have the passion for Singaporeans would wanna sacrifice their "future"? You know this is one woman who deserves all Singaporeans respect, regardless they support WP or not.

The thing is ... even though we may not agree with our governing party, but we cannot simply vote against them to spite them.

Moorspa, you will be very surprise how many who work for the govt has vote against them. Trust me ok.

My parents stay in the Aljunied GRC ... I vist them everyday cuz my boys go there for dinner. Boy, I must say the estate is spick and span. The notice boards are well-organised, with notices all up-to-date. Though the estate is run-down, but you know, the nostalgia of a HDB estate beams thru me whenever I walk from mrt station to my mum's place.

The Hougang residents LOVE LTK, they talk passionately about him. How Mr Low came to their help personally, how he attended every single wake in the Hougang constituency when he was the MP. When Mr Low say he will help, he means he will personally help, not delegate to some other runners to do it for him.

How many young Singaporeans can do that?

 

[taitai]

Anyway coming back to the Chinese PRC problem.

I have raised the issue of illegal PRC prostitutes soliciting sex online to MDA. Why this was allowed, and the website not investigated? MDA ask me to refer to the SPF, which I did, but no reply.

So you see how our ministries "work so closely together", one person push to another. And nothing gets done.

Michillin mentioned that she has obtained the PP# of the PRC woman, let's see what she can do to repatriate that woman out of this country.

I bet ICA or any other relevant party can do nothing.

 

[KitKatBreak]

The PRC bitch is back in Singapore. What sort of evidence can I gather to make sure that she goes back to her China land for good!

 

[sweet75]

Anybody need help?

My hubby is a taxi driver so he is on the road most of the time &amp; its any period of the day as in when he feels he is not tired.

We can help to inform you if he happen to see your partner's vehicles on the road.

 

[first_love]

are u serious???

 

[KitKatBreak]

He should be concentrating while he is driving especially when the haze is here, it is too dangerous to do that. Well, a GPS would be a better choice, isn't it?

 

[wendy_reborn]

although Singapore is small, but its not so easy to bump into each other.

 

[missyme]

jolyon
what is '八字中无见官杀，花姐命'?

 

[toblerone]

因果论 (right click here)(download.pdf format)
消灾解厄、改运解说 (right click here)(download.pdf format)
​

 

[sotong1209]

Should have let the indonesian look read the因果书on page 97. It clearly tells us the karma of burning the forest.

 

[KitKatBreak]

I found a remittance advice of my the other half sending money to the woman in china. Can this serve as part of the evidence when reporting to the authorities?

 

[toblerone]

I found a remittance advice of my the other half sending money to the woman in china. Can this serve as part of the evidence when reporting to the authorities?

没有用。寄钱给那人并不代表什么。

除非，是卖贼脏的钱、洗黑钱等等。来历不明的钱，你丈夫也难脱身。

丈夫被捉去关，面壁思过。这样会好。

 

[KitKatBreak]

A few months back, he already remitted a big sum of 40k to her account in china before she went back. I believe the sum of money is for her maintenance, but if you say that he is helping to remit her salary, i do not think that anyone will believe that. This sum of money that he remitted was three weeks ago and the china woman just came back to Singapore last week. I am still trying to figure out what sort of pass she is holding which enable her to come in and out as she likes. Any advice which authority to report her?

 

[taitai]

The local authority cannot do anything. Who are you going to go to? ICA, SPF or even your MP?

If she's on social visiting pass with a sponsor she can even stay here up to 5 years.

Making short visit trips to her homeland during this time is nothing unusual.

The local authorities know a lot of sh** happening but they cannot stop the vices.

 

[fjcai]

yup i really doubt the local authorities can do anything at all......

maybe if you can get evidence that she is here for illegal purpose than got chance else i really dont see anything you can do.

rather than stopping her think better you focus on your husband and see what you can do to stop him.

 

[newlife2010]

actually if she is on social visit and if u can prove she is here to see your husband to have affair. U can report to ICA with evidence. they will blacklist her even if she have sponsor

 

[KitKatBreak]

I know that the mobile number that the china woman is using is registered under his name. Does that prove that there is something going on between them?

The china woman came back to Singapore two weeks back via social pass but had gone back last week. I believe she will be coming back again as she is still using the singapore mobile number.