(2012/06) Jun 2012

prettibride: hard for singaporeans to leave SG. cause our roots r here.
perhaps those married w/o kids will migrate. or singles will go overseas work n marry.
otherwise ppl like mid age, can't move anywhere. parents, kids r here.
we got no choice. "THEY" very smart.. we have commitments, FT no commitments. also because we choose "THEM" lah.
if other ppl is at helm, i'm sure they dare not open the gates so big. letting 900k FTs in with both eyes closed
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Xiaowei: they have no heart de. they bring their body here while heart n soul is in their country.
so when i take bus, i nvr bother asking for seats. i usually wait for ppl to offer. no point arguing with these low class ppl.
 


Back from lunch... had my usual tomyam u-mian. The aunty overcooked the egg, saying better for me. :p Yuck.. i must tell her not to overcook the egg next time cos I prefer it half-cooked.

Sunbelle, are you ordering from Natal Essential? I went to see their menu.. not particularly impressed and so expensive! Not as if the ingredients they use are premium or anything. I think I'll just get hubby to go down and order from the mixed vege rice stall. They also have herbal chicken, sesame ginger chicken, steamed fish etc..

Asrias, Petrina, agree about those PRC folks who have no culture and manners. How come they are able to come here to work? They don't seem like the educated ones, so they are all labourers and cleaners?? My friend who worked in Shanghai for a few yrs also got a culture shock when she first went there. People there are used to shoving and pushing, cutting queue and talking loudly in public. It's no surprise these PRC folks behave like this here cos they are already doing it back home. :p I never like to visit China and will never go there for any reason.

Is it true that govt must import these so-called FTs because S'poreans don't want to do certain jobs? I think it's only a half-truth cos look at SBS.. they pay their bus drivers so low previously ($1.1K after CPF deduction), who in the right mind will want to drive a bus when the salary is hardly enough to support oneself and parents or a small family? Of course these corporations will go and import cheap labour from overseas to do the job, but they are under-qualified, don't know the local landscape and traffic rules, and can hardly speak English. That's why you see news of PRC bus driver knocking down pedestrian, going the wrong route up the PIE, etc.
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Petrina, yes it's harder for S'poreans who have family here to leave, but it still happens and more and more, it's looking like a more attractive option. Parents won't live forever and children are adaptable. It's possible to relocate even when we are in our 40s or 50s. My ex-colleague told me, he is planning to migrate to Oz precisely because he wants to give his children a better life in a healthier environment.
 
I agree with Petrina lor. Even if we need more migrants, doesn't mean we should welcome any Tom, Dick or Harry into our country. Many don't have the right experience, skills, aptitude and attitude but happily settled down working for an MNC in a middle management post. Expecting to shake leg and earn as much of possible before going back to their country and retire a rich man! And us locals who have to slog for them earning peanuts. Urgh! This topic makes my blood boil!

Then u have more crimes like filipino subletting BTO HDB flats like hotels, banggla killing prostitutes and recently accident due to FT negligence.

http://www.straitstimes.com/BreakingNews/Singapore/Story/STIStory_796479.html

Someone died because of her negligence and all she got was 1 week of jail term!!!
 
Sel, ya.. that's the news I was talking about.. these PRC drivers don't know directions and our traffic rules well. Once I boarded a bus opposite Capital Tower and asked if it passed by Lau Pa Sat, the PRC bus driver didn't seem to understand what I was talking about, even when I asked him again in Mandarin. He doesn't even know which buildings are along his designated route! Sigh...
 
hate to be racist but i do admit i am anti FT to some extent. My wallet got stolen at Lucky Plaza many years back by a FT. And we see more and more ugly behavior coming from them as well. Was at ntuc yest and these 2 filipinos were singing at the top of their voice in ntuc! wan to sing go ktv la..my colleague in office (filip) too, also like to sing all of a sudden. Sometimes i get a shock becos of that..now, i will make sure i have my earphones on in office to avoid scaring myself or my baby.
 
hi fleur fleur,

did your gynae say anything abt the baby weight huh? mi oso been eating durians and more meat too. they help. try that.
 
Prettibride, personally I think PRC are worse than Filipinos who are more friendly. Most of the PRCs I've seen are loud, have no manners and don't practise personal hygiene. They can just spit anywhere. When I was staying in a uni hostel yrs ago, we had PRC students defecating on the floor!!! Apparently they didn't know how to use our flush toilets...
 
hi nattan,

jialat, i oso tink like you leh..am i being racist huh? yeah cos i really bei ta han PRC got one time, they are jus too muchie. me and frens having this cheap steamboat along liang seah st and then this group PRC went to ko the whole tray of prawns and pour the whole heap on their plates.

i spoke to the boss there and the boss say u jus have to be faster hand in action. they send their prc to guard whenever the boss refill the prawns. we never eat a single prawn that nite ...sign...we never ever go back there again too.....
 
Sunbelle, ha... those PRC are really too much... I don't think we're being racist here.. just stating facts and our experiences? I mean how come we don't hear so much about problems associated with M'sians, Indonesians or even Indian nationals? Partly cos our cultures are similar, but also cos we manage to co-exist peacefully through mutual respect. As the saying goes, when in Rome, do as the Romans do. The problem with the PRCs is that they come here and treat it like their own place, ignoring our cultural norms.

Anyway.. too many of these negative reports about FTs :p

BTW, I checked out the My First Skool near my place this morning
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It's really nice.. big, spacious and clean. Saw a few kids with their teachers playing outside the classroom. No babies yet, so not sure of their infant care service level. But looks like a nice place to send my son there next time if we need.
 
sighx..enuff about these FT la. we jus hv to live with it. There are good PRCs also, i have china colleagues (educated ones), who can totally blend in well.

Nattan, when u intend to send your baby to childcare? I wanted to find one for my son after 3 months, but seems like most are fully booked.
 
Actually, I'm ashamed to admit that I quit my previous job bcos I can't stand some Indian foreigners. Especially, since my grandfather was from India before he became a Singaporean and married a local. Can u imagine an Indian Asst Manager with MBA being paid abt S$6k or more per mth and yet types with 2 fingers. Seriously, he only uses his 2 index fingers to type! And I find that most of them are so damn arrogant and look down on others. Just ask any local taxi drivers, I'm sure some of them have learnt to boycott picking up Indian foreigners because of their attitude problem. They are very good at talking and pushing the work/blame on others.

Of course, I have some Indian friends that are dear to my heart. Maybe it's just those in the shipping or IT line?

I do agree that Filipinos are more friendly. I have been blessed to befriend some great Filipinos who are humble and down-to-earth. But I have also come across some who are arrogant and rude Filipinos especially in the service line where they blatantly offer different level of service base on skin color. It's super annoying since we all pay the same price right!

Even PRC, I've come across a few in finance and admin. They are nice acquaintances but if it was me, I would not have hired them. They are very good at following instructions even though it's the wrong thing to do. Eg. They can pay the exact same invoice twice and not even realising it because there was 2 copies of the invoice and it was approved by 2 different managers. A local worker would have at least questioned it rather than pay it blindly.
 
Prettibride, yes I agree that there are good PRCs also, but these are a minority. And much as they are educated and cosmopolitan, many of them also see S'pore as a stepping stone to a better life elsewhere. Well, at least they are not like most of their compatriots who behave like public nuisance :p

I haven't got a fixed timing to send my baby to childcare. Really depends on hubby cos he's starting his own business and working from home. I told him that if it gets too busy for him and distracting to have baby around at home, we can place him at a CC, but it will most likely be after he turns 1 yr old.
 
nattan: the ban mian aunty is right, supposedly we should not eat halfcook food. i also like like half boiled egg..but stopped since i attended antenatal class, dietician told us that we should not eat..sianz

p/s: im so so so sleepy, went to toilet rest for a while also no use...and I still have so much work to complete.
 
thats good..at least u still have some buffer. if i can't find a cc from oct onwards, will have to leave my baby with my mil and maid..but i really worry about their childcare knowledge.
 
kadice
my gynea cleared me for raw foods after 1st tri. but i still eat with caution..only sashimi from reputable places and half boiled eggs once in a while just to curb the craving. i am very sleepy too..really feel like going home, but the thought of taking the long bus journey puts me off..rather wait in office for hubby to knock off. try to eat some snacks or wat..it helps a little.
 
Prettibride, where do you stay? Have you tried the childcare portal by MCYS (www.childcarelink.gov.sg) to help you in your search? Some people told me you should bring the birth cert to the CC asap to pre-register for a place, esp for the hot CCs..

Kadice, I know I shouldn't eat half cooked food, but I always eat my eggs sunnyside up or half-boiled :p I hate it when the yolk is fully cooked through. I stop short of eating raw foods though, so no sashimi for me :p So far my gynae is ok with me eating half boiled eggs, but advised me to stay away from raw meat and seafood.
 
nattan
thanks. yup i know about this link. but hubby was hoping to get a cc near his office..but all fully booked till next year. i'll have to try the ones near our house then..think neighbourhood higher chance.

jolene
are you booking babiesbellies for post-natal or pre-natal? when i tried to book my trial with them, also have to book many weeks in advance. think they are getting popular.
 
Sel: true!! haha.. i have some collys also blur. can pay 2x.. so many times i have to point out their error liao.. nvr check SAP bank balance.

nattan: i also still eat half boiled egg
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in instant noodles. my hb will cook then crack the yolk in half cooked state so tat it seems cook like japanese egg yolk.

prettibride: i'm eating japanese food all these while just no sashimi. all sushi n wraps i take.
 
I love 1/2 boiled eggs and sunny side ups but when i am out with HB he refuses to let me have the 1/2 boiled eggs with kaya toast. But he doesn't realised that the similar concept applies to eggs benedict and allows me to eat that haha. Anyway i never educate him on that so that i can continue to eat that.

Its nice that the Ban Mian auntie is considerate ... this is value added service.
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Childcare
At which month are you all putting?

Sunbelle
Gynae didn't seem worried and said what matters is when baby is out fatten her from then. If too big baby he said i cannot have natural delivery but have to go for C Sec. He knows i am 100% for natural.
What's ur weight gain and baby weight gain?
 
Prettibride, ya try your neighbourhood. My area is an old estate so there are many childcare facilities. Besides, for my case it's good to be near home. In case anything happens, my hubby will be nearby.

Petrina, Fleurfleur, I also eat half boiled egg in instant noodles or with kaya toast at cafes. I think it's fine la. So long as AVA does their checks and our eggs are safe from Salmonella
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OMG... so sleepy right now... !!! =.= Think I'll have another coffee...
 
I love half boiled eggs too, but i'm controlling the in take.. hehe... only once in a while.

Wow you guys are already looking for childcare? Is that too early or do the centres already have a long waiting list on hand? I'm thinking of sending my boy only when he is 18mths old. Hopefully there are some good centres around boon keng area since my MIL will be the one fetching him.
 
Asrias, popular CCs will have a long waiting list. Some people told me to get ready birth cert for registration up to 2 yrs in advance!! I think that's a bit too extreme la. But my colleague also shared with me her experience of not being able to find a CC at the last minute, in the end had to pull some strings through her boss to get the CC she wanted. So I guess it depends on 1) your location, 2) how popular the CC is and 3) the age in which you're sending your child. I suggest you start researching now on possible CCs to place your child, but don't have to register so soon until you're certain.
 
@prettibride have a prenatal package with them and paid deposit for post natal as well. Prenatal all full this week and I can only book for Wednesday next week.

I hope for a natural birth so that I can start my massage as soon as possible.
 
For me i plan to put mine at 18 months ... so if based on the popularity of 2 years advance i might need to register first.
But do we need to pay a deposit or just register because 1.5 years later is quite some time and who knows i may change jobs. I am thinking either put one near my home or near work place so that i can easily pick her up
 
There r many PRCS who hv migrated to Australia too over the recent years. Hv met n befriended quite a couple here since we arrived. But like what some of you said, they r here for good n not just looking for a stepping stone. So they make an effort to integrate. They also tend to be of a higher social class. Richer & more well educated n mannered. Sad that SG is attracting the 'not so good' PRCs working in the front line.
 
Nattan, your hubby very similar to mine before #1 is born. Very confident to want to take care of baby while working from home without any help. That's why I only last minute looking for maid after my #1 was born and 2 mths old.
In fact, after she's born, all our thinking was changed. It was extremely tiring. Really cannot do without helper at all. Especially hubby only 2 man's company works on IT, so everywhere can work. When near deadline he'll work the whole day at home. Even at night, morning till morning again. Zzz. In the end cannot lah, maid is necessary
 
Hi Fleur Fleur ,

My weight gain is abt 9kg n baby weighs 1.3 kg at week 30. haven't gone for next check up. gynae ask me to eat more durians. yeah been eating a lot lately. funny leh. My fren baby grow so much. her baby alreadly 2.6kg in week 33. Very fast . Guess different baby different growth rate.hahaha
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Groovy, my hubby hasn't really started his biz yet, so has more time to help out at home unlike your hubby who has to meet deadlines. Also, I think we're blessed to have a lot of amenities near us like food stalls, laundromat, etc. And we may get a part time cleaner to help with chores so wont be so tiring. I mean, even if I have a domestic helper or CL, I still have to wake up to breastfeed the baby right? So I think tiredness is a sure thing, but we'll find the strength to do it
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Nattan, in that case it's good. Hehe.
For us in the end almost didn't get a maid as the prev agent in the end can't deliver until almost end of my maternity leave! So we find transfer maid in diff agent. We almost prepared for the worst already. The main thing that we need to let go if no maid is sure the no disposable diaper at home things. So troublesome to wash, change etc. 1 day can change more than 15 times!
 
Groovy, what do you mean by "The main thing that we need to let go if no maid is sure the no disposable diaper at home things"?? Must you use cloth diapers? For our convenience since we have no helper, we're definitely using disposables till baby's routine is more established.
 
TGIF!!!

Sunbelle: U are right ... different babies seem to have different weight at the same week. I haven't tried durians yet ... only mao shan wang durian ice cream once bceause i was sick the past 2 weeks.
If my next scan next week still shows a lag then i will eat durians. Only thing is will the durian weight go to the baby or mummy?
 
Wow, then I better start searching for a CC near my MIL place. Been feeling extremely lazy lately, just wanna lie down and watch PPStv on my iphone. hahah
 
haha.. so funny that our bbs haven't popped to see the world, we thinking of cc! i'm guilty too!

the more popular schools would be places like pat schoolhse, chiltern, brighton montesoori.. doesn't come cheap too!
 
I don't dare to think of cc and schools. I'm hoping I can afford to be a SAHM or my MIL will retire to look after my baby.

Hubby and I are seriously thinking of moving to JB since rental there is so cheap. I've heard that u can get a big house for abt RM1k. If I were to rent out my current house and stay there, I would have excess cash from rental income to spend. I've also heard that they are opening up an international school with Oxford syllabus. I hope the fees are affordable enough for us to consider that as an option.
 
Sel: i also thinking of SAHM.. i have 2 kids. dunno whether to put #1 in CC then MIL take care of baby n i work.
but i scared i will favour #1 since i brought him up till 3yo b4 gg back to work. the bond is very strong. then if i dun take care of #2, i won't feel too attached to her.
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abit unfair lah..
 
Sel, yes living in JB would be a cheaper option if you don't mind the daily commute and traffic jams along causeway/2nd link. Also, have to consider the security aspect. If you drive a SG plate car, you'll be an easy target. My friends who are Malaysians and Sg PRs lived in a middle class estate (an aunty's place) for a few months (they both work in Sg) and their home was broken into twice. My friend's car was also broken into and valuables stolen. The burglar was smart enough to disable their home alarm system before burglarising their home while they were sleeping. Thank God they were not harmed! Not trying to scare you or anything, but that's the reality over there. My hubby is from JB also and he wouldn't dare to leave me home alone in JB :p We are always concerned for his dad's safety since he's living alone in a big house since MIL passed away, but he will never want to move here to stay with his children cos too used to the lifestyle there.
 
JB is nice but dangerous.. the only perk they offer is low cost of living.. but yet, i think the disadvantages outweigh the pros.. tho i did thought of buying a place there as a wkend home.. but ha! just a thought cos of cheap pricing.. or will staying in those condo help? they have security to guard the place?

when is taka fair huh? anyone knows? apparently there's one this mth?
 
Petrina, have you discussed with your MIL and hubby about the various childcare options?

Hopecg, forget about buying condo in JB...most M'sians will tell you it's not worth it cos land is so cheap there, you might as well buy landed. Only place where condos might worth something is in KL Damansara area. Besides, their condo security are usually non-existent. Some time ago was a news about metal gates in a condo being stolen to be sold as scrap metal. Apparently the security guard was in cahoots with the thieves! Over there, scap metal is in high demand, so are Japanese cars like Toyota and Honda. They won't bother to steal if you drive local Proton or Kelissa.
 
What abt those properties with gated security? Is safety there still an issue?

Some of my FIL frens are semi-retired and are living there full-time now. So far so good leh. Or maybe it depends on which part of JB?

A few months ago I was shopping at Bukit Indah area and came across quite a few ang mohs shopping and dining there with their family. I was thinking that the high prices in SG must have drove them there as well. To be honest, before this pregnancy, I was spending a lot of weekends there shopping, karaoke and browsing at new properties :p
 
Funny thing is that years ago while hubby and I were still dating (during uni days), I have no qualms about travelling alone to JB and taking public transport (bus ride of about 45min) to visit his family. But somehow around 10 yrs ago, the area seemed to have gotten more and more dangerous. More robberies, murder and rape cases... now I won't dare to travel there alone or take public transport, even taxi. And my hubby won't let me also. It's like a totally strange new place :p
 
Sel, my FIL lives in Bt Indah... gated with security, but do you know there are short cuts into the estate that by-pass the security?? Haha... we hardly go pass the security gantry every time we go there. Day time, the area gives you a sense of security la, but not at night.. it's very dark outside. There's a patrol car that goes around at night, but the estate is so big... hard to cover all areas at once.

Actually costs have gone up since so many S'poreans and foreigners start going there. Things are only slightly cheaper than in Sg, compared to few yrs ago. Do you know that some things are cheaper in Sg than in M'sia? My hubby's relatives say clothes and electronic goods in Sg can be cheaper than in JB so they make shopping trips here once in a while to shop. Some food items also cheaper here or better quality. The better rice are exported to Sg while the cheaper, B grade ones are sold in M'sia at cheaper price to locals.

It's possible to live in M'sia if you adopt a very low key lifestyle. Drive local car, don't reno your house too nicely, don't wear flashy clothes/jewellery, don't carry branded items and speak Malay to blend in. It's very easy for criminals to identify non-locals by your accent. Also, try to vary your routine, don't use the same route every time. It's quite a restrictive lifestyle, but I'm just sharing what my hubby told me. If in Rome you do as the Romans do, then you don't attract so much attention. BTW, recently there was a spate of burglary near the higher class Taman Pelangi area. In fact, although the police HQ is just round the corner, that place has been identified as a crime hot spot! So how safe can JB be? :p
 
nattan: we got new plc. so issue now is shld i resign after baby is born or wait till move to new plc. on 1 hand abit selfish i dun wan MIL to move with us.
but on the other hand i can't burn the bridge after crossing. not filial. so if i resign early, she can either go back to work or retire permanently.
if i resign after moving, then she'll be so old, how to re-enter workforce?

we have slot for MMI near my current place. i dun worry abt #1. i'm concerned abt bonding with #2 as i don't feel too bonded in this preg as compared to #1 pregnancy. very unfair for my unborn child.
 
Petrina, when will you be moving to new place? I think if you worry about bonding with #2, then must make more effort to spend time with her asap. If your hubby can support, then why not resign earlier to spend more time with the kids? Personally I always think that it's best if you can look after the kids instead of relying on others. I was brought up by my grandma till about 12 yo and always had a closer bond with her than my mum. By the time she quit to be a SAHM, my relationship with her was not so close.
 
Nattan, I agree. Some things are better or cheaper in Singapore. I guess security is really a big issue in JB. sigh.

It's so heartbreaking to see ur own child having a closer bond with someone else. I mean if it's their grandma/pa it's not so bad since they are still related. But I have frens whose kids are sticky to the maid and that is just so sad.
 
nattan, I was very afraid of diaper rash. hahaha.. That's why insisting for cloth diaper. Dunno why it's kind of important for me.
My parents/in-law also quite insisting on cloth diaper. I think it's Indonesian habit lah :p. Especially when baby is very small..
It's like something to be proud of if we managed to get the baby to use cloth diaper at home. hahahaha.. Quite funny actually if I think :p.

Favoritism,
I'm insisting to put both babies together in their own room, frankly because #1 has slept alone since baby, and if I put #2 sleep with me it will be unfair for #1 if she knows..
Even though I believed she won't realize it!
But I guess I'll try this arrangement first. Anyway #1's room is very very completed, with her cot, changing table, built in wardrobe (half for #1, half for #2).


To be frank! I remember now that last time before the cot for #1 is delivered, we're still thinking whether to co-sleep or not. But in the end we ask the person to assemble the cot in that room, and we tried to pull the cot out of the room but cannot. It doesn't fit the door. Hahahaha.. The only possible way to move the cot is by disassemble it. So troublesome. In the end we put there instead of our master bedroom.

But of course, hubby and I will co-sleep, cramp in #1 room with #2 as well for maybe 2 months, until #2 is more stable, can sleep overnight :p. Just like when we have #1
 
Hi ladies! TGIF!!
 
Rather busy morning as I’m the only one around in my team holding the fort. Just finished my tabao-ed lunch of porridge with dishes + fruit juice + fruit. How’s everyone feeling today?
 
Care-Giver
 
My sisters and I were brought up by my granny and frankly, I don’t feel close with my mom at all. All my childhood memories are more with my granny taking care of us.
 
But sometimes if we don’t have a choice and need to work, we really need to decide what is the next best alternative care-giver we can give our kids. But I have been hearing my friends saying that their parents/inlaws refused to help take care of the grandchild cos they still want their freedom. This seems to be more and more common.
 


tokin abt sahm. If we only wan2 b one for a period of time, whn wil b the best time? B4 kids go pri or whn thy r in pri or in sec? N for hw many yrs? I m a sahm nw. Bt i wil lik to return to the wk force smday, bt cant decide whn.
 
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