baby_sparkles
Active Member
im rolling in dusts...
Support group - Miscarriages
- Thread starter linda
- Start date
hopeful_mum
Well-Known Member
hahaha soon its ur turn to come and spread the baby dustim rolling in dusts...
stay happy and cheerful. hope its a good and successful round!
princessleopard
Well-Known Member
haze02
Well-Known Member
Wish u my bests dear..!! Jiayou! Can't wait to recieve more baby dust here.im rolling in dusts...
glacierchocolate
Member
Ahhh... How irritating! But glad I see it's not dropping as much now! LolMe too
glacierchocolate
Member
I've just finished my appt at NUH.. The earliest appointment to see the specialists is in Sep! OMG!!!!! Haiz.. No choice but to wait lor.. Wait for 4mths!
Meantime doing 5 types blood tests too, including karotyping. Hubby did only one. Total fees $628.20 after subsidy, but we didn't pay a single cent cos we using Civil Service Card (CSC).. Hehe!
Meantime doing 5 types blood tests too, including karotyping. Hubby did only one. Total fees $628.20 after subsidy, but we didn't pay a single cent cos we using Civil Service Card (CSC).. Hehe!
hopeful_mum
Well-Known Member
WAH! very cool abt that civil service card u have!. ya karyotyping I tink no sub rates. but u didn't pay a single cent!
wah so long!! think now really a lot of ppl see them that's why the long wait. if really cant wait and u can use the card, u can consider seeing at pte. lol I not sure if pte can use or not the card.
but sep really very long leh, sigh meaning more ladies have issues that's why the apt so packed. but u haven't see specialist and already do blood test. actually not bad. I only get to do the blood tests after seeing them. so first consultation with them is to do blood tests. then next visit review blood tests.
but once u get pregnant u will be able to see them once a mth. are u planning to rest or ttc? did they tell u if u are pregnant u can call and inform them?
glacierchocolate
Member
Haha, ya I was shocked when e cashier issued us e invoice n didn't say anything when we were still waiting to do e blood tests, den after doing we went bk to e cashier n she said under CSC right? Haha.. Actually we do pay but tink thru medisave.
Sian indeed gotta wait so long ley, e doc oso said sorry to us for tat. But she said we can still go ahead and plan but I told her our intention is actually to wait while doing all e necessary tests, but who knows it's such a long wait!
Maybe I shld ask them them if CSC can be used if see pte, but I really doubt so.
princessleopard
Well-Known Member
What civil service card? Only sign-on will have or...
baby_sparkles
Active Member
thanks ladies!!! feel so blissful here...
will keep my spirits up!
will keep my spirits up!
hopeful_mum
Well-Known Member
haze haze, use medisave to deduct better than pay cash!!
Coz medisave we wont get the money back one. cash can do other things. nvm, next time u see dr again, for any blood test, or preggie liao can use.
not too late
why my hubby not civil servant?! hahahahaha wah glacier_Choc - u will save a lot in future for more blood tests. they took many tubes of my blood liao.
so u may have to do more eventually after u see them in sep.
Call and find out see if pte can use or not . if can use then really can consider.
haze02
Well-Known Member
Hopeful mum,
If she switch to pte, dun think she have those benefit liao... Gov susidize will be gone too... Once we are private, no matter what we couldn't switch back to susidize patient anymore.. So best to stay on foot... Hehe!
Princess,
Nope.. It only for civil servant. Hehe!
If she switch to pte, dun think she have those benefit liao... Gov susidize will be gone too... Once we are private, no matter what we couldn't switch back to susidize patient anymore.. So best to stay on foot... Hehe!
Princess,
Nope.. It only for civil servant. Hehe!
hopeful_mum
Well-Known Member
So terrible hor. Then see how long can dong as sub. I know another lady seeing as pte. Dr shelia and Gynae. Her bills very high. But I feel all is worth it. Money can earn back.
Just that I nvr on sub before until now. I feel so pampered a as sub. Hahahaha. And last time working time I see pte company pay. Now work with my dad see pte I pay myself Loh.
Just that I nvr on sub before until now. I feel so pampered a as sub. Hahahaha. And last time working time I see pte company pay. Now work with my dad see pte I pay myself Loh.
princessleopard
Well-Known Member
I see. So good! Sometimes self-employed lose out on benefits like this...
hopeful_mum
Well-Known Member
Ya. Sian. Small co no benefits. Last time see go pay 5bucks. Now I pay full amt. heartache. But I lazy to queue at polyclinic.
princessleopard
Well-Known Member
I think likewise too. Civil servants can save a lot on things like this, MNC also have very good benefits. Only small companies have limited benefits, let alone self-employed...
glacierchocolate
Member
No worries babe, it's better late than never! Remember to present it next time!
Only civil servants will have the card... Oh, welcome back! Hehe
Ya, I agree too! Really save a lot, like today we saved $600+ cash le. But my hubby said it will be deducted through his medisave, hehe! Luckily I'm not afraid of blood tests de, or rather needles, otherwise it will be a torture! Lolhaze haze, use medisave to deduct better than pay cash!!
Coz medisave we wont get the money back one. cash can do other things. nvm, next time u see dr again, for any blood test, or preggie liao can use.
not too late
why my hubby not civil servant?! hahahahaha wah glacier_Choc - u will save a lot in future for more blood tests. they took many tubes of my blood liao.
so u may have to do more eventually after u see them in sep.
Call and find out see if pte can use or not . if can use then really can consider.
glacierchocolate
Member
Hey baby_sparkles, what's FET? Anyway best of luck ya!
princessleopard
Well-Known Member
Thanks! I see, I saw the word civil and thought maybe civil defense men will have it. My hubby with civil defense before.
baby_sparkles
Active Member
Tx ladies *muacks* hope everything will turn out well n successful and can bless everyone here
dolly_gal
Well-Known Member
Hi mei, go google confinement caterter n download their menu.. then u have rough idea wat to eat.. I showed my mil n she said she cooked for me similar to it.. those soup u can buy from medical hall where it's ready packed like 八珍，十全. My mil went to tapao pig stomach soup for me.. most of my dishes used alot of sesame oil n ginger
baby_sparkles
Active Member
hi mei: OMG so sorry to hear that and see u here!!
i did a herbal bath daily with boiled water, drink soup and dishes cooked with DOM, sesame and ginger laced food... for about 2 weeks.
avoid heavy chores and carrying of heavy stuff.
i did a herbal bath daily with boiled water, drink soup and dishes cooked with DOM, sesame and ginger laced food... for about 2 weeks.
avoid heavy chores and carrying of heavy stuff.
baby_sparkles
Active Member
Yup try again when u are ready.. dont rush, ur body needs to recover.
Chew Sok Koon
Active Member
Dear ladies,
I am still bleeding since last Friday. Yesterday went out for a walk for a while, came back I had quite a bad cramps and more blood clots. My gynea said it is normal to bleed for another week when I went back for my review on Wednesday. I felt so depressed stepping into the clinic and super sad when I took back the lab results which just stated that the pregnancy was not viable. Still have some mild cramps today. I hope my body can recover by next week. If bleeding still continues, I have to go back next week again for review.
I am still bleeding since last Friday. Yesterday went out for a walk for a while, came back I had quite a bad cramps and more blood clots. My gynea said it is normal to bleed for another week when I went back for my review on Wednesday. I felt so depressed stepping into the clinic and super sad when I took back the lab results which just stated that the pregnancy was not viable. Still have some mild cramps today. I hope my body can recover by next week. If bleeding still continues, I have to go back next week again for review.
Chew Sok Koon
Active Member
Hi_mei, I just did my D&C last Monday, mine was 8 weeks. I have been eating food with ginger and sesame oil and drink longan + red date + ginger tea. Take lots of rest, dun do strenuous lifting.
hi_mei
Well-Known Member
Thanks for the ans... Hope ur bleeding stops soon... It is very sad but try to look at it factually... Usually such cases due do genetic abnormality. At least it ended relatively early rather than discover at 16 or 20 weeks that the fetus is abnormal and have to abort, or give birth to a baby with lots of health problems...
I am gg for d n c on Mon... Hope it is smooth and not so painful...
dolly_gal
Well-Known Member
Mei, for my dnc last year, wasn't pain n no bleeding or spotting after tat. I m not sure is it gynae did a good job or wat. But bcos I was alone from admit to ot without dh, I kind if scared. Gynae sedated me personally n when I woke up I m back in the ward resting..
Chew Sok Koon
Active Member
Thanks! hi_mei, it won't be painful. I remembered I was so nervous that I keep shivering in the operating theatre that the nurse and my gynea had to crack jokes to calm me down. Once sedated, I don't remember anything and by time I woke up, procedure was done with no pain. The pain will only comes when the womb recover to its normal size by contracting and that is when some ladies will feel cramps and bleed which is what happened to me. But other than that, it's the emotional pain that needs to recover. I told myself the same thing when I found out that bb has no heartbeat - Discover early rather have problems later. Very often, it does take a while to get over it and move on.
Is this your first pregnancy? Take care and rest well after the procedure. Take your time to recover.
hi_mei
Well-Known Member
Thanks dolly gal... Think u are v brave to go through the experience... I will also be alone for the d n c. In fact I don't really know how to handle this with my dh.. He is cracking jokes and sometimes hug me, but I imagine he must be so disappointed. He was already checking out hospitals to do the delivery and looking at strollers, then this happened.
Sok koon, yes it is my first pregnancy. Very depressing. I keep crying but not sure why. Don't know is it disappointment or anger or guilt. Keep crying out of the blue, at the bus stop or at lunch. But only do it when I am alone, not with dh or friends... Find it v hard to explain the feeling... Feel just like hiding in one corner away from everyone....
Sok koon, yes it is my first pregnancy. Very depressing. I keep crying but not sure why. Don't know is it disappointment or anger or guilt. Keep crying out of the blue, at the bus stop or at lunch. But only do it when I am alone, not with dh or friends... Find it v hard to explain the feeling... Feel just like hiding in one corner away from everyone....
dolly_gal
Well-Known Member
I tik my dh went away cos he aso vy sad...but he said he can't cry anymore cos cannot b 2 of us kp tearing at home, he has to b strong n move on at that point.
We just hug each other when we need some comfort then he passed extra $ to mil to cook meals for me during my mini confinement.
After 2-3 months later we went hk holiday w my in laws before I proceed to my fet which failed. Dh said he expected cos his gut feeling told him during et wor..
We just hug each other when we need some comfort then he passed extra $ to mil to cook meals for me during my mini confinement.
After 2-3 months later we went hk holiday w my in laws before I proceed to my fet which failed. Dh said he expected cos his gut feeling told him during et wor..
princessleopard
Well-Known Member
Dear ladies,
I am still bleeding since last Friday. Yesterday went out for a walk for a while, came back I had quite a bad cramps and more blood clots. My gynea said it is normal to bleed for another week when I went back for my review on Wednesday. I felt so depressed stepping into the clinic and super sad when I took back the lab results which just stated that the pregnancy was not viable. Still have some mild cramps today. I hope my body can recover by next week. If bleeding still continues, I have to go back next week again for review.
Hi,
When I did the D&C, my spotting went on and off for 4 weeks. It worries me back then too. Not so much of the cramps though. My first AF came 6 weeks after D&C. Then I went for review to ensure no more clots left in the womb.
baby_sparkles
Active Member
Hi mei: it is perfectly normal to suddenly cry when we r alone cos of what we are going Thru or went thru. We r very shaken by the non growing baby... It is fine to be traumatized esp if it was both our first pregnancy ....
I cried my heart out but I recovered very fast after d&c because I told myself I can only move forward not backward. I think my friends who knew it r kinda surprised I recovered so fast ... Cos I tell myself I want to pick myself up n start the journey again. I couldn't wait to try again really. I cannot dwell on the past which has already become history
I slowly resumed my gym visits, kickboxing classes n dance classes .. I felt happier n recharged
I cried my heart out but I recovered very fast after d&c because I told myself I can only move forward not backward. I think my friends who knew it r kinda surprised I recovered so fast ... Cos I tell myself I want to pick myself up n start the journey again. I couldn't wait to try again really. I cannot dwell on the past which has already become history
I slowly resumed my gym visits, kickboxing classes n dance classes .. I felt happier n recharged
hi_mei
Well-Known Member
Thanks baby sparkles and dolly gal... Glad to hear the advice of others. Will learn from ur strength and try my best to move on.
Just a qn, i was wondering if I shd tell my MiL that I was pregnant then miscarried? Or dun tell her i was pregnant at all. She suspects that I was pregnant but I have nv cfm this with her. My fear is that she will scold me for doing something wrong and cause the baby to be lost. U know how old folks can be sometimes, and my parents in law are the "traditional" kind.
Just a qn, i was wondering if I shd tell my MiL that I was pregnant then miscarried? Or dun tell her i was pregnant at all. She suspects that I was pregnant but I have nv cfm this with her. My fear is that she will scold me for doing something wrong and cause the baby to be lost. U know how old folks can be sometimes, and my parents in law are the "traditional" kind.
mangohope
Active Member
Since they don't know I will choose not to let them know. The old folks will one 101 things to say although they meant well but still for myself I will rather they don't know 1st. It's up to you to decide and how close you guys rs are
baby_sparkles
Active Member
For my case my hub is the only child and my pil are q close to him. They would wana know everything happening to us so from subfertility to ivf to my failed pregnancy they know all. But they r q sensitive she doesn't ask abt me in front of me cos she doesn't wanna give me added pressure
It's up to u depending on ur rship w them
But seriously if given a choice I'd rather not say anything till preggy ...
It's up to u depending on ur rship w them
But seriously if given a choice I'd rather not say anything till preggy ...
dolly_gal
Well-Known Member
It really depends but since my in laws know abt my bfp last year so naturally when dnc we have to inform them. This round we wanted keep quiet too but bcos of my bleeding losing one beanie, my dh felt he shd tell his parents abt it... I just let him b cos he need to let it out then kp to himself... it may not b bad yo share the news w them though at least get their understanding as well...
hi_mei
Well-Known Member
Haiz in the end I decided to tell her. Was qt touched that she didn't blame me, and said nevermind. But she also said mb the baby wasn't healthy because of the unnatural ivf process and she prefers we try naturally (which is impossible). Then she started talking about how about adopting, which was qt upsetting...
hopeful_mum
Well-Known Member
Sorry ladies need a listening ear. Hubby and me are getting very attached to the beanie now. But we haven't even cross the first trim yet. And we both know the worry won't end till we deliver the baby.
Last night my hubby was quite emotional. He told me he doesn't know how to handle it if things don't go well again this time. He will be very hurt and don't know if he can try again.
Sigh hurts me also to see him go thru such emotions. But there's nothing we can do except to pray and take care. We have gone tru so many mc he is so tired of it. Very emotional draining. As much as we are trying to think positively somehow we are both worried.
Last night my hubby was quite emotional. He told me he doesn't know how to handle it if things don't go well again this time. He will be very hurt and don't know if he can try again.
Sigh hurts me also to see him go thru such emotions. But there's nothing we can do except to pray and take care. We have gone tru so many mc he is so tired of it. Very emotional draining. As much as we are trying to think positively somehow we are both worried.
hopeful_mum
Well-Known Member
Ur mil is so nice. If I told my mil abt adopting. I think they probably ask my hubby go find another wife. Hugs babe. Now it's a very emotional period.
hi_mei
Well-Known Member
Sorry ladies need a listening ear. Hubby and me are getting very attached to the beanie now. But we haven't even cross the first trim yet. And we both know the worry won't end till we deliver the baby.
Last night my hubby was quite emotional. He told me he doesn't know how to handle it if things don't go well again this time. He will be very hurt and don't know if he can try again.
Sigh hurts me also to see him go thru such emotions. But there's nothing we can do except to pray and take care. We have gone tru so many mc he is so tired of it. Very emotional draining. As much as we are trying to think positively somehow we are both worried.
I think it is qt tough for both of u... Just try to think positive. Are u nearing the 2nd trimester alr? If so, it is alr a good sign.
My hubby also talks about giving up v frequently. Hence, have to spend a lot of time and effort to be positive in front of him otherwise he really give up...
hi_mei
Well-Known Member
Yah she is qt nice... Was qt surprised at how she approached it. But I am just too sad and emotional to think of anything...
hopeful_mum
Well-Known Member
Thanks babe. I still have 4 more weeks to 2nd trim. Just taking one step at a time. Some things are beyond our ctrl.
For now don't think of anything else. Just grieve properly. It's a tough journey to recovery. But we do recover and become stronger.
At least ur mil isn't giving u guys pressure. I read of cases where the mil scolded the DIL for not taking care and losing the baby. Reading such things drive me insanely mad. At least she is rather supportive. And she knows both of u have tried very hard.
hi_mei
Well-Known Member
Yup just try to be positive. I know it is hard and u are prob v worried. I try to read Buddhist philosophy books to take things easy, helps in letting go of your control.
Ya I really hate it when ppl give pressure. My hubby's extended family is like that and for a long time my in-laws were asking so much about babies. And always the ladies problem though in my case it is low sperm count. Was so frustrated until my mother spoke to them and they understood the difficulty, hence now they are more understanding. Now much better, though they still believe it is a ladies problem, haha!
hopeful_mum
Well-Known Member
Lol they will nvr blame the man! I sometimes very evil. I hope it is my hubby's prob. Lol but of cox I hope no one has prob. But once got his family comments II get irritated.