Support group - Miscarriages

[ineedmilk]

mspiggy:
even tho its a blighted ovum ie. no foetus, still feel sad hor? Alot of ple told me, i shouldn't feel too sad cos its not a baby anyway... but to me, I felt its my baby... Mine was worse, not even a yolk. Only an empty gestational sac at 8 weeks.

Same as you, this is my 2nd "preg". My first pregnancy went well, no problems, no morning sickness. My girl is now almost 2YO. So I was totally thrown offguard when my 2nd preg is a blighted ovum. Never expected it. Gynae told me this happens to 20% of pregnancies. That's quite a high percentage... that's why its scary to try again. The cramps after a d&c was killer for me.

applemuffin:
no explanations as to what caused blighted ovum. Just didn't work out - the chromosomes or genes. My gynae advised me to religiously take folic acid regularly next time when I'm TTC again.

 

[ineedmilk]

Irene:
I can't take more MC, too much work to do. So gotta go back to work tomorrow. I dunno how to work man. I feel cold so easily now.

 

[mspiggy]

AQ,
exactly!!!! i was also totally thrown offgruard when Gynae told me it's not a good news!

I was alone during the 1st visit, coz hubby got urgent meeting and I still told me nothing to worry just scan only! didnt expect this to happen!

Felt so sad and down... like you said many told me there's no live yet. But somehow we still feel for it coz it's in US! I was crying a bucket then!

Yeah my gynae also told me it happened to 20% of pregnancies. But that was the 1st time I heard anything abt it!!! Tears just rolled down as she explained

 

[mspiggy]

applemuffin,
dont give up... you'll have your own healthy baby very soon. just relax

 

[eunice72]

wow, did not know there are so many kinds of food that I should not be taking. Frankly, have not been careful with what I have been taking except the vitamins after the D&C. Also thought have bu too much during the mini confinement cos been down with headache and sore throat v often.

previously before D&C, my temp will shoot up from 36.2 or 3 to 36.9 the next day. But these few cycles, either no rise in temp or the rise is gradual. Like few days back, rose from 36.2 to 36.5 and stayed for a few days then now 36.7. anyone experience this kind of trend? Plus is already my 27 or so days already.

Roxyz, already going onto my 4th cycles soon...

 

[ineedmilk]

mspiggy:

yeah, I was alone too in my 1st visit... had to see gynae cos I woke up and found that I was spotting. I was panicking at the clinic .. then after the gynae told me that its 50% chance that its a blighted ovum, I cried buckets after that outside the clinic.

 

[roxyz]

hi aq and mspiggy
I understand wat u all mean. Suddenly gynae told me bb heartbeat weakening and not going to live beyond 1 week... world just collapsed and I cried like mad in the clinic, people must be wondering what happened...
Life moves on... we must be strong and pick ourselves up.. it's good dat u all have a kid already... for most of us here, it's first pregnancy which is even more heartbreaking but we are not giving up and continuing to try and neither should you all

Eunice... I only started tracking BBT 2 cycles ago.. super erratic like urs... mine even worse coz 2nd cycle only 15days and 3rd cycle is 34..im normally 28. Hopefully now back to normal, so you do not worry too much k? Coz it took me 4th cycle to be back to normal also...


Thanks apple! I am hoping it stays high also.. keeping fingers crossed.. 1 more week to 2ww...
I normally try not to eat cold drinks and ice cream but more because i'm having this recurrent cough....

 

[applemuffin]

how much folic acid is enough? 400mcg daily ok?

 

[xbliss]

500mcg or 5mg is the usual amount given by gynae. You can get the pre-packed tablets at selected guardian.. i think is about 50 tablets for $2.50 or $3.00.

 

[san_d]

hi all,

Was bleeding last fri so went for scan but can only see water sac. No yolk sac, no bb... which shd hv been 10 wks old...

Admitted to hosp for complete bed rest but menstration came... On Mon, bld test showed hcg level dropped and scan showed water sac shrunk. Underwent d&c in dr's clinic...

Dr just said bb unhealthy. I went online and checked, I think mine was a blighted ovum too...

 

[xuanting]

hi sandy, i'm sorry to hear about your loss. are you resting at home now? please remember to do the mini confinement to regain your health ok. hugs.

 

[xuanting]

xbliss and all, national geographic's 'in the womb' series has started. this thu 9pm they'll be showing an episode on the gestation of twin human babies (repeat episode i think). tonight and last night they showed different animals (dog, dolphin, elephant) in the womb and they're all so cute!

 

[san_d]

hi xuanting,

thanks. Yes I am resting at home now but will start work on Thurs... I saw the "in the womb" episode too! The elephant foetus is amazing. I think they will be featuring on twins & triplets etc... Will try to watch all.

mini-confinement
May I chk if it's ok to drink essence of chk 1st day aft d&c? Can we shower? So far (seems so long along but it was just Mon I did my d&c) I'm taking shower everyday... is it ok? tks.

 

[mspiggy]

Sandy,
sorry to hear abt your loss. i recently just had a blighted ovum too. didnt realised it's that common.

Re :mini confinement
i also shower everyday but my mum is preparing those ginger stuffs for me. i do drink the essence too. try to rest more.

 

[san_d]

Hi mspiggy,
Thanks for consoling me. I'm sorry for your loss too. Ever heard abt it but nvr tot it would happen to me. But I read that it rarely happens again so let's keep our fingers crossed.

Re:mini-confinement
Thanks for sharing. 'cos of this website, I asked my mum to make longan with red dates drink for me. My mil & mum dun really know wat to cook, my mil cook xxx for dinner, then my mum also cook xxx for lunch... *faint* Then I went online to look at confinement catering menu & show to them... hope they hv more ideas...

Do u shower with herbs? I didn't. Also din wear long sleeve and long pants... too hot...

 

[xbliss]

Sandy, like you i am also very scared of heat. in my last mini confinement, i din wear long sleeve and pants lah. Think i will suffocate in singapore weather. I even used the fan in the day and air con at night but i avoided blowing fan directly at me, tilted it upwards. As I am very against chinese medicine cos of their weird taste, i rejected all the food my mil made. I only drank the red date tea which is nice! Foodwise, i ate a bit of those weird stuff and passed everything to hubby. I took centrum multivitamins which worked really well for me. To me, confinement is a personal thing. If you say need to bu, then how come the ang mohs dun need?! no offence lah.. but u can see how anti i am against herbs! ha! then again, when my second trimester comes, i'm looking forward to bird's nest!

 

[roxyz]

sandy.. sorry to hear about your loss. Pls try to shower with herbs at least for the first few days. I didnt take bu also... but kinda regreting coz feel giddy recently.. not sure is it due to the fact that I never bu at all...

 

[applemuffin]

sandy, i showered with herb alternate days. wore short sleeved top but long pants. Sweat alot becoz i took alot of ginger, DOM and chix essence. First wk after D&C, dont bu, let the blood flow out. Can start bu 2nd week

rest well...dont carry heavy things..

 

[san_d]

Hi xbliss, roxyz & applemuffin

Thanks gals for sharing. It's really a blessing to hv found this website to hv someone who understands & are willing to share...

xbliss, congrats! when is yr second trimester?

roxyz, I did ask my mum, she said only give birth then need herbal bath... just shower with hot water enuff she said...nvr too late to eat well, maybe u nd iron supplements? must tk care yah?

applemuffin, b4 I had my d&c on Mon, I was already hving menses for abt 3 days. Then aft d&c, I had sm bleeding on Mon & Tue and today bleeding stopped, only sm spotting. I've started drinking essence of chk since mon evening... should I stop & start nx Mon instead? How abt vinegar pork knuckle? Can I take now? Sorry so many qns...

 

[applemuffin]

sandy, herbal bath is good cos it has ingredient to make u sweat out and keep warm. Might want to try, can purchase from medical hall, boil and add into your hot bathing water.

If you have already stopped bleeding completely, then ok to drink chix essence. I experienced drinking while having slight spotting, then full flow came again. First week of D&C just eat healthy food like ginger, fish, eggs, sesame oil, red dates/longan drink. 2nd week then start taking DOM, chix essence or anything herbal..

avoid cold fruits, veg. Can take anything heaty cos our bodies "cold" after D&C. Oh i also didnt take a drop of water for two weeks after D&C. Just red dates drink daily..

I didnt eat vinegar pork knuckle cos i dont like the smell of pork..hee

no worries abt the questions...hope my info helps..

 

[san_d]

Hi applemuffin,

Thanks for your info

I'm already sweating like buckets... these few days have been hot! I'm in t-shirt & shorts plus fans not switched on. Feel like in sauna...

I'm still spotting so maybe will wait until it stops then 'bu' further. hm... though I drink red dates/longan, I still drink water 'cos somehow the drink doesn;t quench my thirst... opss... I ate lychee lst night but after I left it in rm temp for a long while...

Yoga
Any of you started yoga? Been to Amore's? I can go once a week for free (ladies card) but nvr tried... I'm terrible at stretching... Any recommendation? tks.

 

[san_d]

Just received an invitation to my secondary schmate's bb's 'man yue'... I tot I'm strong but can't help but feel saddened by the tot of seeing a newborn...

Initially tot I'll be there to 'surprise' them with gd news 'cos by then I wld have past 1st trimester...

 

[mspiggy]

sandy,
understand what you meant! my buddy just gave birth to a princess on Tues. though happy for her but cant help feeling abit sad seeing the cute baby.

 

[xbliss]

i mc-ed in dec last year, but skipped cny..went for holidays instead. just cannot bear to hear what others have to say. It's ok to take a respite.

 

[rest_relax_forever]

Sandy, understand how u feel. I also mc this feb and now in my office, i look left and right got so many preggie colleague. Though feel happy for them but can't help the pain in my heart. Sigh* Sigh*

Hugz sandy, don't feel sad, look to the future. we are all here to support each other. Perhaps you want to go for a short break after yr confinement, it will help. But frankly, it took me 3 months to be able to talk abt my m/c without tearing. So, rest well and come in to chat often. ok.

 

[ineedmilk]

Hi Sandy
Is it really true blighted ovum will rarely happen again? I had the impression that its very common though. I just did my d&c last Fri and i bath every day.

Hi all
How do you gals drink DOM? I tried a sip and "burnt" my mouth! So my mom recommended another tonic wine, Wincarnis Ginger wine. Its alot easier to swallow so I stopped DOM.

 

[xuanting]

hi guys, re the bu3 or not during menses, i read that menstruation is a period of rest for our reproduction system so we should not attempt to bu3 it during the first three days. just let the system rest.

 

[applemuffin]

AQ, you can add warm water to DOM, it tastes better and easier for the throat.

Sandy, if you really dont feel good abt attending the bday event, should skip. After my mcs, i skipped CNY..like xbliss, i couldnt face ppl asking even if they meant to be concerned...

rrf, understand how u feel...my office announce preggie news every other week...i feel v sad, heart just feel so heavy whenever i know of the news...

xuanting, yeah thats why always bu after AF, not during AF

it will cause the system to produce more AF if bu during AF period.

 

[mspiggy]

AQ,
I'm taking Wincarnis too. But didnt drink it directly. Mum added it in her cooking for me. Maybe you can do that for DOM too.

 

[roxyz]

Sandy, after my dnc I stopped attending pple's man yue for those I am not close to.. Dun tink I can take it...


Hi apple, I know wat u mean. Another frd is 2 mths pregnant and she only started ttc 3 mths ago... haiz

 

[mspiggy]

ladies,
let's be strong and move on. i know it's really hard but gotta let this matter have a closure.

my gynae told me after my D&C, this is case closed and you guys gotta move on. Rest well and can start ttc after 3rd cycle.

 

[roxyz]

yes, mspiggy!! We must stay positive... it's tough but got to try.

I'm now in 2ww... AF due next Tues, currently temp still high, so keeping fingers crossed. Staying positive because of 2ww.

 

[applemuffin]

jia you roxyz

i am anxiously waiting for 3rd cycle to come. But again doesnt mean u want, u have...still gotta take a few months for it to happen...hopefully faster..

 

[applemuffin]

btw, anyone experience yellow discharge after D&C? I never used to have that until I mc the 1st time, thereafter, always got yellow discharge, never really clear and white like before. But no smell or itch...
Normal?

 

[mspiggy]

roxyz,
JIA YOU!

may i know what do you gals mean by 2ww? and when shd we measure the temp, how many days before AF or after AF?

 

[mspiggy]

roxyz,
JIA YOU!

may i know what do you gals mean by 2ww? and when shd we measure the temp, how many days before AF or after AF?

 

[applemuffin]

mspiggy, 2WW = 2 weeks wait (that happens after your Ovulation) Just buy a 2 decimal thermometer for BBT charting purpose and take yr temp 1st thing every morning when u wake up, still lying on the bed.

 

[mspiggy]

applemuffin,
thanks. start the temp tracking after our menses is it? sorry so many qns.

 

[eunice72]

Hi gals,

Yes the feeling can be bad to see our friends announcing the gd news. In fact my buddy has also just given birth. Was really happy for her but yet when i went home, i just cried. As mentioned previously we were weeks apart only....but i guess each has their own set of problems as part of trials in life. Now she has to worry abt bb's health as born a little early.

Am waiting for the 4th cycle or gd news if any though latter quite low chance la.

Hi apple, did not experience any yellow discharge.

Anyway, we must all jia you together. Weekend is here so let's enjoy some precious moments with our hubby. Some er ren shi jie while we still can afford the time

 

[roxyz]

Thanks apple and mspiggy. Keeping fingers crossed that a BFP is my birthday present for this month. But seriously, even if really BFP I also wun be that happy, will be more worried instead because of previous MC. But anyway just stay positive now...


Hi mspiggy
Supposed to track everyday at same timing. Best to take it once you wake up. During AF and before O, you will find your temp lower. When there is a sudden dip in temp followed by at least 3 sustained days of higher temp, this will mean that O took place on the day of the temp dip. After O, it is called the lutuel phrase and you will find that temp is generally higher than before O. If temp stay high even when AF is due, got high change it's preggy. If BBT dips, mean AF reporting soon

Eg, my temp before O is normally 36.3 - 36.5... after O is 36.6 - 36.8. So you can track when O take place and agar agar can know if you pregnant or not according to BBT

 

[roxyz]

Hi apple
I dun have any discharge at all.. not even ECWM during O. Only thos thick "bai dai" which means I'm too liang

 

[xuanting]

hi roxyz, read that food that are nourishing during 2ww (after ovulation) are warming food like:
ginger; ginger tea; beans; grains; and vegetables such as mustard greens, winter squash, cabbage and kale. avoid ice cold drinks, ice cream and foods that are very cold.

and food that are nourishing before ovulation are:
fruits such as raspberries, pineapples and grapes; vegetables such as asparagus and beans; adequate proteins, especially tofu and fish; and organ meats such as kidneys, brains and hearts. avoid spicy, pungent foods.

 

[mspiggy]

thanks roxyz for the explanation.

what if i want to track when my O is taking place so that i can ttc? reason being i have irregular cycle hence difficult to determine when O is taking place.

 

[applemuffin]

mspiggy, u should start tracking yr BBT the day your AF comes (it is CD1 = cycle day 1) and continues until the next cycle comes. then you start another CD1.

 

[applemuffin]

mspiggy, u cant really track O day on the month itself, you will need a few months in advance of tracking to determine roughly which cycle day you are likely to O. Some O during CD10, some CD12, some CD16, some even CD20 something...it all depends on yr body. Hence if you track your temp for a couple of body, it will tell you roughly when yr body O.

 

[san_d]

Hi ladies,

Thank you all for your concern...

apple & Roxy
hm... I dun think I'm going. V scared wait c bb I duuno how I'll react. Got a few otr clasmates all bringing their bbs/toddlers...

mspiggy
it must be hard on u, somemore yr buddy, v hard to aviod. Jia you! You'll hv your own prince/princess one day

AQ
Yes, according to what I hv gathered fm various website, they all seem to indicate that blighted ovum is usu. a one time incident... common but V rarely happen to same person again. My best fren's sis 1st preg also blighted. Now she's preg her 2nd bb

xbliss
Thanks, do tk extra care and by nx CNY can collect ang bao liao ;b

RR (rest-relax)
Really thankful that all of u r so supportive... I just started my new job so maybe when things settle down then go for short trip. Tks for the idea ;>

mspiggy
I hope the closure comes soon... My d&c was on Mon, today went back to gynae for scan. He just said fm lad test (contents of d&c), bb is not healthy. THen I had to go for bld test, going back in 2 wks for results & scan... Hopefully after that can really hv closure...


Do u gals hv to go back for scan & bld test after d&c? Maybe my gynae just v careful kind...

 

[kit_mum2b]

sandy,

i dun remember my gynae doing any blood test for me, even why my bb got no heart beat.. he din test for me leh....
is it a must procedure to test why miscarriage?

gals,
recently see my colleaque (few more weeks more than mine when i was preg that time), her tummy starting to show... i feel so sad seeing her... and recently dunno why... suddenly missing my bb so much... sigh................may be AF coming, tat's why ba.........

 

[san_d]

Kit_mum
That's why the dr said, to find out why I lost my bb... He wants to make sure it's not infection or some immuno issue so it wun affect my nx pregnancy... Dun think it's a must. Just that my gynae is the v thourough type...

It's not easy to face another pregg mtb... But isn't it gd news that your AF coming? mayb v soon u'll be like your colleague When i see otr preg ladies in the clinic, I just feel so envious, esp those bringing a toddler and preg with another one... Let's encourage each otr to jia you

 

[xuanting]

hi sandy, i think tests are usually conducted only for recurrent miscarriages; your gynae is very thorough indeed. all the best for your scan and blood test 2 wks later.

 

[san_d]

Hi Xuanting
Tks. Haiz... dunno gd or not, all these test & scan is costing me a lot... I'm also wondering if I shd change gynae... Did u watch in the womb? Last nite was part 1 of twin/triplet/quadruplet