Support group - Miscarriages

Angeline,

Me going to let it bleed out and just go for the appt next week. Hopefully my next scan can see the sac and everything gone and clear from my uterus. My first mc no spotting was 1 thing but when the babies no heartbeats I was still not spotting which the body refuse to register miscarriage *fedup*. Those are the cases that would need D and C in my opinion.

Now can start to chart BBT just for the sake of it... because now the cycle is haywire. Once your period comes start on a fresh cycle and list that as CD1

OP, I am sure this baby is a keeper for you! =)) but is true I see everyone so excited in the thread I didnt even feel an ounce of it when I found out I was preggers. Not easy for us to overcome these burden..

Ahbui so sorry for what you have to go through! Sometimes I really think is just not fair.. why are some of us chosen to take this path. JTML is right take this time and recuperate. I cannot imagine the pain you have to go through due to the stillbirth. One thing for sure is that they have went to a better place.
 


ahbui
Sorry to hear about your loss, especially at this stage.. For the moment, you need to rest well. Parts and parcels in life, I guess we just have to accept it. Take care ok?

Ling,
My mc was same as your 1st. No symptoms of mc at all. I hope the best for you no matter what
 
ahbui,

*hugs* I hear and feel your pain...
sad.gif
You are NOT useless and definitely NOT a burden to anyone!

Do a good confinement for the sake of yourself and the next baby/babies that you will conceive. We share your grief with you here on this thread.
 
JTML,

I am also a bit amazed that I didnt hue and cry like the other time. I guess it helps I only see the sac with no fetus inside. If I see a fetus inside I probably would have been so broken.
 
Ling,

Thank you for your comforting words. My being here in this thread is a constant reality check. We know it doesn't matter if it's 10wk, 13wk, 24wk, etc, or whether there's spotting/no spotting, nausea/no nausea. The truth is anything can still happen. That's a fact of life but not everyone is able to appreciate it (for obvious reasons).

Happy are those who do not have to be put through such diffcult situations in life. Their optimism is theirs alone to keep. They are indeed very blessed and I'm happy for them.
 
yeah OP: sometimes I read the MTB threads. Some ladies can actually book Confinement ladies pretty early. For us, it will never be so ...
 
JTML.. so right.. in fact I counted about 12 weeks of pregger most are ald calling confinement ladies! I think no one will entertain us next time.. imagine us calling the confinement lady and tell her tomorrow I going to give birth you can help do confinement.. LOL!

OP our road are just a little tougher.. which I lament however I believe God's fair so we probably are so lucky in other aspects of life which we dont realize...
 
Jovial - finally i meet someone with the same gynae! I went to him cos of the gd reviews that i see online.. but sadly never got to experience labour in his famed hands...yup.. still trying for #1. Are u scheduled to see him again? he told me to go back in march but i also dunno for what.. just told me to keep a menstrual diary..

angeline - my hubby prefer that i continue working cos he thinks it's financially more secured to have dual-income.. also he thinks i cannot sit still..so will go mad if i stop working.. which of course, i beg to differ ;p

Ling - salute u for ur strength.. take care okie?

ahbui - hugz.. sorry to hear abt ur loss...Like what OP said, u are definitely not a burden to anyone! No need to feel pai seh... yes.. and just cry if u need to.. there was an occassion one mth after work when i was so overwhelmed by the pile of work to tackle and the heartache from the m/c that i cried all the way home on the train... quite embarassing.. but at that time i really couldn't take it.. if people want to stare, let them stare lor..

OP - So how's ur little buddy coming along? past ur first trimester already? yah... agree that those ladies who can afford to be optimistic are very blessed... what irks me are those who dun treasure their blessings... even the sight of a pregnant woman jaywalking puts me off now.. and my pregnant colleague eats pineapples, drank beer and break all sorts of taboo with no problems.. just hv to remind myself that everything is fated... while i'll continue to try me best, some things in life perhaps can't be forced..
 
Ppcc,
dr Ho is good. He got good stitching skill. That make it all worth the $$.

My mc was last sept. I visited him last oct and he mentioned I'm all clear. N never ask Mi to go back.

Maybe he just wan to follow up cos u 1st baby.
 
ahbui, so sorry to hear about your loss. I lost my baby at 20 weeks too last Aug. Tough isn't it, especially when we were already half way through our pregnancy. I have never stopped crying after the incident, i cried so hard and i cried so much that it affects my eyes and my chest is painful.

However, time will heal, nowadays i still cry, not so much becoz i am sad but becoz i missed my daughter. One day and soon, you will find yourself ready and wanting to TTC again. Take care.
 
Jovial: late about 2 weeks liaos! >_<

Ling: hais. i dunnoe how la. TCM also doesn't make it come!!! I keep feeling the pulls, cramps and stuff.. but no blood out! SIAN! seems like PCOS is not under control again..
 
ppcc - decided on the jabs cos I am really hoping to have a bb by end of this year, so asked the doc if there is anything else we can try since he says we are doing everything right already. I am turning 33 by end of this year and HB will be turning 39 soon too...so even tho this is only my 3rd menses since m/c, i just feel like time is not on our side. But with these things, i guess one can never rush.

Sorry, just some late night rambling:
I dun noe whether u gals feel the same...but i feel like my whole life is revolved around TTC-ing....and sometimes I really feel tired...I used to really like diving, wake-boarding...but nowadays, i dun even dare to plan dive trips or go wakeboarding cos i always think about "what if I am pregnant?" and this started since end 2008 when we decided to ttc. sometimes i think i am obsessed cos i spend all my time reading up on different pregnancy/ttc websites after the m/c. when it is time during the month to try again, HB feels stressed too and bd is always void of romance...i wished we have tried much earlier when we just got married 3 years ago. i feel like i need to get myself out of this rut.

well, enough rambling...my colleague just sent me a file to review. good nite and TGIF
 
ppcc,

I'm abt wk10 but still a long way to go. The last chk @wk8 was ok. But then again, you know..... *shrug* *wistful smile*

pixie,

Is your menses regular? Do you chart BBT? I really think this BBT thingy helps to cut down the TTC-g effort in that you know just when is the golden week, and you know just when you can stop trying and relac.

For the cycle that I started charting BBT, the moment I detect a spike in BBT, I will happily lay off BD. During the golden week, can BD alternate days like 2-3 times and that should prolly suffice. So in that entire month/cycle, maybe only need to "forced BD" 2-3 times. We BD on a Wed and Fri, and I O on Sun. It's still possible to strike even if BD 2 days before O.

Before I charted BBT, I can't quite tell when I O because the semen got in the way of my CM observation. So end up BD-g more than necessary, and it was very tiring. I think charting BBT everyday is lesser effort than BD-g every other day.
 
Good morning girls,
I told my mum this morning, i look at posts of mc/still birth, I feel so broken.

Even if the preg could go like 35-36 weeks, there are still chances that bb not surviving through.

Haiz，i really dunno how would i cope with my next preg
 
ppcc,

Maybe the gynae want to follow up and help you get preggers. Isnt that good? So pro active!!

Lynn, Unfortunately I am a classic example of going to TCM after MC and the dowager go missing for 3 months. Only when I went to the gynae which I guess make me less vexed and hence period report on the dot. Go for it! Dont waste time..

pixie, totally understand what you are talking about. I too put a complete hold to my lifestyle to TCC. No more tennis games , no more long travelling plan in advance, no more clubbing and drinking just no more everything. Even going on business trips now I tried to stay out of it. I am going to turn 32 this year so I ald want a babe because I am still so keen to have 3! Goodness... Even though we got married 4 years ago we decided to put a hold to TTC because of career and also selfish couple wants our own time. My hubby was working overseas for a few years so when we got married we decided that we will enjoy this time. So regret now!! Anyway Pixie this thread is precisely for us so dont feel bad abt rambling infact I enjoy reading everything here =)

Girls just to follow up on my condition. I got up at 5am this morning with cramp went toilet and bleed the bowl with clots a few times. Last time I went at 7 ish pop a something which I suspect is the sac but the water is too bloody for me to make sense what is it. Wanted to go to work but the spasm of cramp make me decide otherwise and I call in on urgent leave. My hubby insist to go to the gynae but I just want to let it bleed out. Now I am okay bleeding is like light mense ald and I am springy. Will be glad if everything is spurge as OP say as long as my body can reset asap I am a happy camper! =)

I am sad that this is not successful but it is just fated we will try again. Just so glad I have a channel to vent!
 
OP.. Goodness! You become BBT convert! My gynae will be so proud that we are spreading this knowledge! HEE!!!

Pixie, I can tell you when I learn BBT I strike my first pregnancy on 2nd month and my current pregnancy on 1st month...

Angeline, *hugz* dont sad okay.. It is always very difficult to accept so fast. Must take time to heal and get over it. If you ever read our archive in Sept you see us hue and cry for so many weeks after D and C. It is just our way to get on with life.
 
Ling,

Sorry to hear that, i share your pain *hugs*. i think if you should visit the gynae to check that you are mc.

I'm getting pretty emotional these days.. I hope i can get over it soon and be ready in april for next TTC though seems like i'm lack of confidence now to think i could carry a bb to full term.
 
ppcc,
Actually i also not intending to break very long, just that after mc, it seems that my whole world has gone hay wired. Everyday I look at my job, the things I doing, I feel even more determined to leave this place. It's just creating so much stress. Imagine when I was doing my D&amp;C, my com still can call me to ask about work! Ridiculous loh.. I just feel that I need some rest emotionally. Change an environment, meet new ppl, new plans.
 
Ling you are so strong. I don’t think I will be that strong if I am you.
Hugz….. I hope you are feeling much better.

Angeline I know what you mean. Me too don’t have the confidence and I think throughout the pregnancy I will be so stressed and don’t think I will be able to enjoy every moment of it.

Lynn me too know the fustrations of it. Can feel the cramp but cannot see blood.

Pixie I know me too. Like for example yesterday while I need to be on the feet on the ballroom for at least 2 hours making sure that the event goes well. I was thinking this will be terrible if I am preggie. I also don’t dare to anyhow eat things and in fact I had stopped drinking chinese tea too. I also feel sinful if I occasionally eat Mac and Ice Cream.

Last time I also have the thought to get married enjoy a little while before ttc. Now I realized that we may not have the luxury as biological clock is ticking away. More so that hubby wants like 2 or 3 kids. By the time, I will be able to like 35 years old liao… Sigh… seems like a bit old and may be high risk.
 
Angeline,

I read that it is normal and I am not bleeding much just like light period after the clots and stuff. I have an appt on Monday so will go to the gynae on Monday. Just want to be lazy and rot on the sofa. If afterall the bleeding the sac is in there than have to D and C which I hope not!!!

Can understand the part abt new environment. Just take your time to do it. We only live once!

Vi and Angeline, I think the experience is too raw for you guys now because you just had the D and C only a few weeks ago. We are just human.. we dont get over thing so fast. We need time to heal, we need time to gain our confidence back. What is important now is we will be stronger after this experience. We are chosen to walk this path simpler because we are stronger.

We will make it.. I am dead sure! =)
 
Ling,
I'm very glad you are so strong and calm! But seriously if you don't feel well, must go and see your gynae ok? Seems like i'm more worried than u haha

Well, just what doesn't kill us makes us stronger!

Vi
I think i just have that motherly nature right from the start. I rom in 2007 and was so ready for bb at that time already. But becos financially hubby tot that we were still not stable yet so we decided to try after our wedding in 2008. When we tried for like 1/2 yr and no news, i went to gynae and check to see if actually i did have problems, then i'm so right and dr koh diagnosed that becos of my stress, I didn't ovulate at all and had to went on clomid treatment. In fact when i knew i had a problem, i was so sad! cos i wanted a child soooo much! So i guess as each step gets nearer each time, from the time i didn't ovulate and actually conceived another 1/2 year later.. I guess it's could be god's plan for us to get ourselves prepared to be a parent with a longer path.
 
Ha ha my motherly instinct only came when I MC.... Then I realized that time is ticking away. Last time dont kind of fancy kids.

Just wanted the world to my hubby and myself. My hubby more kan chiong than me. He loves kids.

My work also stressful because of meeting budgets and satisifing with guests requirements and office politics, think it makes it harder for me to concieve. Hmm....
 
ahbui,
sorry to hear what has happened to you. Do take care of your health. Come here and talk to us if you need a listening ear.

Ling,
you are really courageous. is the bleeding painful? Please do go visit your gynae if you feel the slightest discomfort.

Angeline,
Like you, I also rom-ed in 2007. Also due to financial worries and plus wanna enjoy couple time, we held back baby making plans. We started trying in late 2009, I managed to conceive after about 4 mths of trying but who knows.. Really regretted not planning for a family earlier.

I always thought that preganancy is such a simple thing. Do the deed, sperm meets egg and voila! you get a baby. Just have to be careful throughout the 9 months, watch your step, dont fall and you'll have a wailing baby in your arms after that. How naive I am! Now then I understand that a mother's love is the greatest. Never did it came across to me that there could be situations like not ovulating. From the moment that a mother has decided to ttc, she has already so much to consider. Not to say when the baby is born, she'll worry even more.

When I realised I was pregnant, I worry about ectopic, molar pregnancy. After that, I worry if I can see the yolk, foetal pole. And then I worry about the heartbeat. But god didnt give me the chance to worry about whether baby will continue growing healthily throughout the rest of the remaining weeks.

No offense to anyone, but at times when I think of how other mtbs complain about their morning sickness, I told myself I wouldnt mind the worst of morning sickness just to have a healthy baby to carry home at the end of 9 months rather than to go through such physical and emotional pain.
 
Ling, do go to your gynae if there's anything that doesn't seems right yeah. *hugs* feels so sad that you've to go through this again.
sad.gif
 
I do not have good news to share too. I went for a scan today and baby is very small and cannot see heartbeat. I was told to take blood test (HCG) and on Monday i will know the result whether this pregnancy is a healthy one or not.

If not, i will have to remove the fetus, either a D&amp;C or opt for natural bleed.
 
Girls,

Feeling good today. No cramps and bleeding subside to light period. No discomfort or anything
happy.gif
looking forward to see gynae this mon.

Ahbui , we are here together so don't ever think you are alone. I defintely nothing courageous just want nature to take it course.

Shiseru, your Dating might be off plus no spotting is Good news. I read still early until 8 weeks.. So don't stress out. ESP those with tilted uterus also dificult to see .. I will be praying for you.
 
Ling good to hear that you are ok and taking things well.

Shiseru how many weeks are you in now? I hope that everything will turn out well for you too.

Marcaroons same sentiments. I romed in 2007 and then customary on 2009. I was also naive to think that just BD and strike and then there will be a baby out in 9 months time.Never know have to eat and take care of myself until the TCM physician told me to be careful of diet and a lot of things.
 
Ling..

*Big hug for you*
I am so sad knowing what had happened to you, you are such a strong lady, will be praying for you and let's jia you together!

Shiseru
yea how many weeks are you in now? Agree with Ling, it's still too early to tell! hope everything turns out fine.. bb and mummy must jia you!

Angeline, Jovial, maracoons and ahbui,
yeap we are never alone, if not this forum, i think it will take much longer time for me to get over my previous m/c.

Thank you everyone.. you girls are the best..

Da jia jia you, and TTC together! also we have BBT master here Ling, haha sure will strike la!
 
my next visit is only on 9th feb, next tuesday. last visit was on 13th jan, so far so good.. pray pray..

4 weeks don't know what is happening inside my womb.. well, i try not to think about it.. sometimes i pressed my tummy deeper hoping to feel some movement T_T

siao siao already..
 
Good morning girls!

Macaroons
I had the same thinking you had exactly, tot preg is so simple, never ever tot there is so much to worry about. Ya, i too feel the same way, when I got preg, i tot i'm 1 of the lucky 1 without any morning sickness, now given a choice again, i will go through it, if it's a way to tell me that my bb is normal/healthy.

shiseru
don't worry, hope everything will turn out fine.

Shanne,
yes i agree, we are definitely not alone. We must look forward and we shall spread bb dust to everybody! You must jiayou ok? I believe everything will turn out ok!

Ling,
How are you feeling today? Hope you are ok
happy.gif


i went shopping last weekend, and still feel quite emo when i see ppl carrying new born bbs and seeing bb boutique. haiz. To think back how excited my hubby and I were when we knew I was preg and was so happy when we were so tempted to get those cute little clothes.

Argg.. Hope those days will come again, happily and healthily!!!
 
Shann,

I guess just fated and I really just want to get on with it.. You dont worry about a thing. Just continue to have a nice and enjoyable pregnancy. =)

Angeline,

Today is okay I am back at work. Hopefully tonight gynae visit will put some closure.

Somehow have no mood for chinese new year which is lousy!
 
Ling,
Ok, keep us posted
happy.gif

Arg, i also.. started my house chores again, stopped for like 3mths, hectic, today so tired.. body aching argg..
 
Looks likge god wants to take away my 2nd little angel too. My hormones value is the same as 2 days ago, so will expect to miscarry. I opt for natural bleed, no time to go D&amp;C, coz I have already booked a tour and leaving to Hokkaido this Thursday. I understand I may miscarry while I am in Japan, and if the bleeding gets severe, I will have to go to the hospital in Japan.

To have lost my first little angel at 20 weeks, got pregnant again just to realize god is gonna take this little one away again, i am dumbfounded.
 
Just happened to look through this thread....

Shiseru: I'm so sorry to hear about your possible loss. I wish you all the very best and hopefully miracle will happen.

Even with the 4-month old precious little one, sometimes his laughters triggered the sadness for losing his brother at 34 weeks...I wonder when will I stop thinking like this....but maybe I will just continue to miss my child who stayed in me for more than 8 months....

All the best to everyone here!
 
Shiseru,

We will accept fate but we will not bow to it. It is difficult I know so well. Just bring your maxis I am almost done with bleeding since it is abt a 6 week sac..most impt if you feel any fever must go to the doc.

I so want to give you a big hug!!
 
hi shiseru

none of the words can console you. But don't be sadden by the whole things. It really happens for reason. Hugs....God bless

my first miscarriage, baby stoped grow at 6 weeks, by i only bleed naturally during 8-9 weeks. It was quite painful like severe cramp for few hours. After passed the big blood clot, no more pain, like normal again.
you take care, hopefully all is well
 
Thanks ladies, mine looks like a 5-6 weeks sac, so i thought i should opt for natural bleed.

I told Gynae i insists to go Hokkaido, and she prescribe me antibiotic and pain killer in case I start to miscarry in Japan.
 
shiseru,

I feel your pain and helplessness when I read your posting....
sad.gif
*huuuuuuugs*

I pray that all will be fine for you during your Japan trip, with minimal discomfort. When will you be back? Pls take care!!!
 
Update from my gynae visit.. Sac is gone thank goodness and just left the uterine lining in another words mense.... Gynae told me no give up she see me soon ... Frankly just relieved now no need to do d and c...

Shiseru , my sac measured abt 6 weeks plus but I had an alright cramp when I pass it out on Friday. So just be prepared for it but is bearable in my opinion.. Be brave we will tcc soon!
 
Shiseru

Hugs..I am very sorry to hear about this. Hope everything will be ok soon, one way or another..cry as much as you need to. Please take good care, and please do not give up.
 
Ling

Yes, do not give up. All of us here will ttc together.

Shiseru

Im truly sorry to hear about it. Like the rest, I hope that you can go thru this with as little discomfort as possible. Do take care during your trip too. Hugs!!
 
Shiseru - really sorry to hear abt this... please take care in hokkaido.. have a good trip, come back and bu urself and we try together okie? remember u are not alone

Ling - glad there's somewhat a silver lining and u are clear to ttc again. hv a good rest
 
Ling,

Good to hear that all is looking fine! It's wonderful how our bodies are able to clear the our systems naturally! With this, you can embark on your ttc journey sooner than if D&amp;C is required, which is both invasive and expensive.
 


Ling glad that everything is ok for you.

Shiseru hope you are feeling ok. Dont think so much and just enjoy your trip to Hokkaido and have to take care of yourself there.

Sorry I just have to rant here... small problem compared to the rest of yours. After D&amp;C, Af have not come yet, this is bothering me a lot. Gynae said that should come before chinese new year but this week is already CNY.... Dont know what is happening to my system gosh.....
 
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