Support group - Miscarriages

nas,,
nope..not yet..
suppose to go for the scan todae at 4...which is soon...sigh...actually its not even about the heartbeat la..cannot even see baby how to hear heartbeat...sigh sigh...going to confirm todae lor..doc say very bad..no growth..

hi vera..
i not carrying too much hope..
juz hope to get it over n done wif...
will update you guys as soon as i know wats the outcome...sigh
 


Bebechc,

I hope your test gets a positive result....All the best and take care of yourself...

I also spotting very regularly...and im only 6 weeks...so i also pretty worried for myself...anyhow, I will pray for you, just did!!

Hopefully everything goes well for you!!

Cheers
NAs
 
HI BEBECHIC. why don't you try another gynae. sometime maybe the machine is not good enough.

I find that it is better to get a second opionion first before you proceed to do anything.
 
Hi Bebechic,

I agree with Ling...Cux hor, what kind of scan did you undergo...The normal scan i did only showed a gestation sac but no bb (fetus)...

Until I did the internal scan then it shows the fetus..Maybe you should really check it out...

I think KK will do a thorough scan for you...the internal one i think!!

Nas
 
YES BEBE. when i go for the second checkup, was ask to drink lotsa water and the doc did a scan but cannot find anything. then he ask me go pass urine cos i'm urgent. then he did an internal scan and found the baby there.

think the scan was actually to make sure that hte baby is in the uterus and not any other place.
 
hey gals,,
i am back from the checkup..results no good..besides no growth, there is no baby as well. sac also stayed the same size as last checkup ,doc suggest a wash tomolo..thanks for all who gave me so much support...i really appreciate..but this cannot be helped. well..i am okie, since i oredi expected it, hubby is very very upset....

doesn't help when we know we need to spend 950 to wash it out..

so wun be able to tok to you gals tomolo..take care!!..and i will take care too...dun worry.
 
Hi, bebechic,

Get a second opinion. I had the same experience as you. Went for a wash without getting a second opinion. Quite regretful after that.

Please, see another gynae.

Will pray for you.
 
hi bebechic...
i'm sori to hear dat... but take it in good stride. if its not meant to be, it was not meant to be.

when i had my miscarriage, my gynae oso told me that can always try again cos still young. i'm sure its the same for u.

jus rembr to nourish yourself well after your wash and take good care and rest well....
happy.gif
 
hello ryan n tintin
i know a 2nd opinion is good, however becoz the growth of the sac is not even there, i am very sure dat its gone, coz my gynae monitored it for a couple of weeks liao. i do not think there's any hope and i dun wan to think of any, i haf also went of duphaston, but it doesn't help.. so i guess dats it. i know it not meant to be, it came at the wrong time, its evil to think this way, but some of my hubby's fren also think dat it might be better for our financial health, coz we haven even recover from our wedding expenses, and there are so many commitments we haf to attend to. tintin...you went back to work already? how's everything??? are you going to try for another one soon???
 
Hi bebechic,

IM so sorry to hear that...sure doesnt help to have to pay another $950...

Anyway, try again and take good care of health...Rest well..

Nas
 
Hi bebechic,

Dun feel sad.
Rest well and dun forget to take tonic to build up your body.

The $950, half of it can be paid by medisave.

Talk to us again when you feel better.
 
hi bebechic...
how are you feeling? hv u gone for the wash? take good care hor...
happy.gif


as for me, the wash took place slightly over a mth ago. i'm back at work and resuming normal life. will be trying again after a couple of mths' time. wan to rest my body, as well as build it up first.
happy.gif
 
helo gals,
went for the wash liao..everything was ok except for that drip thingy they put on my left hand..cried very hard coz of the pain on my hand, even the nurses tot i was funny, spoke to a couple of gals there too, mainly went for abortion, some went to clear up the womb but not pregnant. after the wash i never go home, went out to play pool and followed by mahjong. everything was alrite till at night i had a very bad attack..something like heart burn...so you gals encounter dat? it still quite bad for me.. intend to see a doc on mondae if the heart burn dun go away, i dun have much medical history, dunno why is this happening, wonder if its the medicine..pls advice.

was given 7 days MC, but i going to work on monday, not going to do any mini confinement or what, juz drink chic essence.

tintin, when did your doc advice you to try, my gynae say only after 3 months..i dun think i dare to try so soon..i am seriously scared..esp when i went thru abortion and now miscarriage...
 
Hi Bebechic,

I also went thru the same process when my gynae found out no foetus in the sac. After D&C, she dun even allowed me to go home though I feel alright. Supposed to be only half a day, but stayed in the hospital till 8pm. If possible, I really think that you should have some rest and mini confinement, maybe just for a few days before going back to work. There should be a review 2 weeks after, but if really feel uncomfortable about the heartburn, go back to your gyane immediately. Take Care!
 
helo all..
i just realised that my gynae actually make me go thru evac of uterus, not D&C leh. do you gals know wats the difference??
 
hi bebechic,
my gynae told me i can try again after 2 months... and to be frank, i hv had an abortion some yrs ago... like u, i wasnt ready to be a parent.
mine oso evac of uterus... me oso not sure whether its the same as D&C, so i take it as the same.
i wld advice to go back to ur gynae if ur heartburn persists. u shld actuali use the 7 days and rest at home. it would be better for u to rest and give time for ur womb to recover.

regards,
tintin (used another name cos i cant post using tintin)
 
hi tintin...
not dat i wish...but i am really glad to find someone in such a similar situation as me...coz i think no one can understand wat i am going thru... like i noe i shouldn't feel bad abt the m/c..but somehow feel if its the previous abortion dat coz this one to not survive...sigh sigh...now abit scared to try...went thru 2 times..dats why can take it slightly easier... i think my boss very worried abt me also...but she cannot help...my presence is indispensible juz at this moment coz my colleague went on leave. no one else can cover..so i need to be back at work. yesterdae night i puked badly once i eat the antibiotics, so i stop taking it now. i juz wan to know wat are the ways to make our womb more healthy..

i also dunno wats the difference betw D&C and evac. coz i also went thru dilation what...forgot to ask doc.

so are you trying for a baby soon???...i wanted to..but hubby see me like very cham..say we'll try again next yr..but some say its good to try right after m/c...i will be glad if i know any gals trying besides "worried"...need to know more brave souls....
 
hi bebechic,
do continue to take the antibiotics... cos it will prevent your womb from getting any infections during this period.

will try again after next mth... i'm not reali scared cos i think still young, and my gynae said that there shldnt be any probs.
happy.gif


so u shldnt be afraid lor... reali seriously... dun be scared. sometimes, god make certain things happen for a reason.
 
a lesson for us to take it lightly the first time? dunno leh..juz scared...my gynae say next preg got 90% chance succesful after the m/c.. hope dat it is real..

you can try earlier than me!! muz let me know of any outcome yah!!...sounds exciting again...
 
Hi bebechic,

Do try to take some 'Dang Giau'. Quite easy to boil too. If not try to take some DOM.

Do hurry in trying if you are not ready. It is better to wait till your body and mind are ready then try again.

In the meantime, try to rest more. Take Care.
 
yo gals...morning!!
very happy to see so many of you trying again..i believe wat most people say...you will almost nvr be ready to be parents...so i feel like trying SOON..but i also very scared..mixed feelings...its great to know dat worried suceeded!!...guess i haf to wait another 3 months lor..better also..when i settle in my job well..

will try to get hubby to cook dang gui for me to eat...coz kitchen is his domain..hehe.
 
Hi bebechic,
Sometimes old folks says things hor, must follow a bit lah... So that we can conceive and carry our babies to full term next time. After my d&c, at first I didn't believe, then I wash the kitchen floor, after which I got terrible cramps and i bleeded more. Then I carried my almost 10kg niece for a distance, then I cramp till I had to eat painkillers.... I drink cold drinks also will like that. So I think it is my womb's way of telling me to treat it better.

How is everyone here? Vera? Modi? Tintin? Ryan?
 
sigh..i also dunno how..i try to avoid cold drinks lor..then i dun do housework...for a few daes liao...wait for hubby to do.i feel more upset by the fact dat nobody cares..the old folks like in laws n even my own mum..couldn't be bothered...(now no baby..so everyone dun care)think they more busy wif their own stuff...only my fren bother to cook the ginger chicken for me to get rid of "wind"..very pitiful hor.
 
Hi bebechic,

I believe it's not that they don't care about you, it's just that they may not want to bring out the topic to make you feel more sad.
 
Hi Linda,

Me fine. Any updates on your side ?

This weekend will see the physician again. Hope can get green light to try again. Wonder if the medicine works on my hubby...
 
hello vera..
maybe they dun wan me to be upset la..i had a quarrel wif my mum the day b4 i went for the wash..knowing the things i was going through she still asked me to do some ridiculous chore..like developing photos..i am totally put off..but anyway..dun care la...if they dun ask anything is ok..but they are not even showing the slightest concern like ask my brother to bring over some tonic. sigh..but not a time to self pity...at least i am quite strong in character...if not cry myself to bed everynite liao.
 
hi linda...
thanks for remembering me man...
happy.gif


me doing fine now... jus finished my first menses after the wash... hehe... will be ready to try again after the next menses... ;)

bebechic,
wat linda said is correct... the recovery period is impt cos your womb has just been so-called "hurt" and you have to take good care and have enuf rest and dun move abt too much...

for me, after my wash, my mum made me eat confinement food for abt a week... during the entire week of MC, i stayed at my mum's place and she took good care of me. i barely stepped out of my house... furthest i went was to help her throw garbage.. hehe...

i'm still drinking chicken essence now once a week, not frequent but better than nothing.
happy.gif


regards
tintin
 
Hi all,

Glad all of you are well. Now, having my second period after D&C. Will try after the third period.

Now building up my health. Must keep myself healthy for the baby.

My mother and colleagues took very good care of me after m/c. Colleagues helped me carry all the heavy stuff and gave me lots of encouragement. Mommy bought a lot of herbs and pork for my hubby to cook. However, I did not touch the pork cos' after m/c found pork very disgusting as it resembles the blood. Din tell my in-laws about the m/c though. They din know I'm pregnant in the first place.

Very postive that God will bless all of us with children.
 
hey gals..
got another qn to ask...my gynae never tell me how long will i be bleeding..actually its 5th day after my wash liao. i am still on n off spotting. is it normal??...if not i think i better go find him tonight.
 
hi bebechic...
to what my gyane told me, she said it'll be normal to bleed for anout one week.

btw, where did u go to for the wash? kk? which gynae u seeing?
happy.gif
i oso went to kk.
 
me went KK also. dr christopher chong...he joked with me..say anything happen..got chris chong..ask me not to worry...hahaah he's a nice guy
 
i quite suprised my gynae called me to check on me..he told me if i feel uncomfortable can dun eat the antibiotics..yeah so happy..so i juz stop taking it.
 
hi bebechic
hi, it's chris! do you remember me from the other thread? so sorry and shocked to hear abt your MC. hope you are feeling better now. do take good care of yourself and rest well ok?
 
hi chris!!
thanks for your concern...i am okie liao...juz abit unlucky..gynae say i very naughty go back to work..hahaha..but i am fine..dun worry. am trying to take care of myself now!! how are you by the way?? which gynae u seeing now?
 
hi bebechic
aiyo, you really beri noti. should rest well mah, why you go work?!

i went kl last weekend. shop like mad man! my MS over liao so feeling much energised nowadays. i m with charles lim at mt e. glad to hear you have a good gynae!
 
Hi Vera, Modi, Tintin, Ryan, Bebechic, Worried

Just to share and hopefully will be able to give you some hope...

I am 12 weeks pregnant. I apologize for not sharing earlier. We had doubts and fears of this pregnancy which occured the 2nd mth after my d&c, it wasn't planned. This means I had only one menses after d&c. And things were made worst when we can't see a embryo at 6 weeks. We were prepared for the worst and decided not to tell anyone so that we didn't have to "explain" to others and faced with Qs like "Why did you have to get pregnant so early??". I also had a faint positive pregnancy test (alike my first try) which I read that indicates a weak pregnancy or a pregnancy likely to end up with a miscarriage. I almost died when i read that....I didn't want to go thru it again so soon and I hated the thinking of having to tell even parents.....I just wanted to pretend nothing happened.

But thank goodness, we saw the heartbeat last gynae visit. And although I dare not think I am 100% blessed with this baby yet, I allow myself to, at last, be positive abt this pregnancy. I forbid myself to think abt it previously cos I didn't want to grow too attached - 'just in case'. We could feel the baby's heartbeat just above my pubic bone now and if God bless, I shld have a healthy baby in my arms in Feb.

I share this because I understand the fear that each of us have....the tears we dared not cried out sometimes and the silly thoughts of "what ifs"... I hope my story will be a positive cheer to all of you trying and those who succeed and is scared....Like Worried..I had the same problems like her.... I too scrutinise my panties for signs of blood everytime I feel wet below, I dare not be happy.... But I know this is normal....
 
Hi Linda!!!!!!
I am SO happy for you!!!!! CONGRATS upon dat!!!! you gals haf really gave me courage to try again soon!!! i can understand your feelings really... i thank wateva there's above for this new life of yours!!!! i believe your postings on this forum have benefitted many and saved some little lives!!! please take GOOD care of urself and update us as and when...got a feeling dat you fag in the past...remember to quit okie??..

lots of luv n wishes..
bebe
 
hi linda, this is mae , if you could still rmber..just wanna say congrats and your good news definitely brought hope to me..
happy.gif
thks for sharing the gd news wif us. Just want to ask you some questions, what is the reason why they couldn't detect the embryo at 6wks? and at how many weeks did u detect the heartbeat? I just wan to know if there is still hope even there is no heartbeat detected at 7 wks? appreciate if you could share more info wif us...& did u have all the symptons again, as the 1st time?
hehe my Af not here yet, & even though I m harbouring some hope, I dun have any symptons at all, so mebe false alarm again..
 
Hi all,
I used to be from the thread "mothers-to-be" but my worst fears happened.
Last fri when i went for my 2nd gynae check up. No heartbeat was detected, I was 9th wks pregnant. Dr was very worried for me and immediately send me to a hospital as they have more advanced machine to scan for heartbeat.
But the results was negative as the other doc reconfirm with a report and radiography x-ray scan. I was devastated and shocked. My mind was in a chaos as i keep asking myself how this could have happened!!! I mean I ate well and i sleep well and I took care of myself!

My gynae did explain that it could be due to my egg, my HB's sperm, my blood... and other posibilities. And the thing is I didn't even bleed or anything like that, but the scan did show a lump of stuff which the doc said that its blood clots that's abt to be expelled naturally.
I was advised to go for an evac of uterus the next day cos gynae sort of say it's quite confirm that there's nothing they can do but to take out my baby so they could sent it for a lab-test and hopefully can find out why... ...

Friday night was horrible - my tears just rolled and rolled. I just feel sad that I can't even protect my little one!!!!

Yesterday, I was totally knocked out during the op. Woke up with this dull ache, a bit like menses cramp, stayed in hospital till evening, left for home.

Today I am slowly trying to recover for the mental and physical pain of what I've been through in just 3 days time. I am glad there's this thread whereby at least I know I am not the only one out there...

I hope everyone here who's been thru this will recover well and like you guys I am gonna try for another one as soon as its possible.
 
hi chestnut..
you are juz like me..wonder if you haf seen me in the MTB thread..gals here haf gone thru wateva you had...i did my evac the fridae prior to yours...please take very good care of yourself and we shall try again very soon yah...dun worry too much!! we are all here wif you...
 
Hi Chestnut,

Sorry to hear about what happen! Nevertheless, take good care of yourself now and you'll be able to try again soon.
 
hi linda...

reali happy for u!! *hug* take good care and dun move ard too much.
happy.gif
i can understand how u feel abt being unsecure and stuff... i will prob go through dat myself the next time i conceive. u hv all my blessings.
happy.gif


i cant wait for my next menses to come to start trying again.
happy.gif
lets all work hard.
happy.gif
at same time, take good care of ourselves. I hv started the habit of drinking milk often. hv to start building my body.

hi chestnut,
sori to hear abt dat. dun wori too much. if u are worried, maybe u and ur hubby go for checkup after u hv rested well.

i'm not sure abt u gals but for my case, my gynae said it is high chance dat the cell division jus stops and hence its a "missed miscarriage", hence no heartbeat. she told me its not uncommon and can happen to abt 15% of all pregnancies. she even told me it has nothing to do with the egg or sperm. she assured me dat the chances of me conceiving a healthy baby again is still very high.

so i'm pretty hopeful. let's all not lose hope. sometimes god make things happen for a reason.
happy.gif


cheers,
tintin
 
Hi Girls,
Thanks for the congrats.
happy.gif
I still dare not think too far ahead but at least for now, I know baby is safe and I will take each gynae visit as it comes.

Hi bebchic,
hehehehe...I QUIT-ed. I am glad all of us here are here to share experiences and fears... It made my days easier too. This topic is not something well-shared among even friends...We need to have one another.

Hi lilac (mae)
I didn't have much symptoms this round. I think the reason why no embryo could be seen at supposedly 6 weeks was cos it was too "early" or that my previous menses was early/ delayed. meaning there is a mis-calculation. Then on next visit, we could see a sac. Third visit, when I SHOULD be 8 weeks, we saw the heartbeat. But Gynae put me at 9 weeks according to the ultrasound. So i think not seeing the heartbeat at 7 weeks is fine cos to calculate from our last menstrual date is not so accurate cos we all kow that conception could never have taken place then.

Hi chestnut,
Please come in here and share with us your fears and anxiety if you are comfortable. Dun blame yourself for what had happened. My doc says in every pregnancy 15% results in a m/c. It is far more common than we thought. It is nature's way of quality control. If it is unhealthy, no point bringing it to this world. This is how I thot to myself. Most impt is you MUST take good care of your body now. Eat your tonics and rest well.

Hi tintin,
It was tough in the begining. I kept thinking of what if and more what ifs.... But I stop myself and ask hubby to give me "Happy Thoughts" to think about....so he will go "think of Xue Xue", "Think of MacDonald breakfast". It helps and makes life easier to bear during the initial stage. I am sure you turn will come soon. Take good care.
 
hi all thanks for your concern, im trying to look on the brighter side of things...

hi tintin & linda,
yup, im going to c my gynae on wednesday and see what he says... that day my head was swimming with so many whys that i was quite dumbfounded...
Dr did say too that 1 in every 4 woman will suffer a miscarriage... and that if its unhealthy, it wont survive...

Can I check with you guys how many days did you all stay indoors for the mini confinement after the op? I intend to return to work after 5 days of rest, which is thurs... Is it too rushed??
 
hello chestnut..
5 daes is good enuff rest..if you need to go back work urgently..i only had 2 daes rest and was bk at work liao...but do remember to take tonics..and rest while you can..chicken essence, dang gui, hong zao boil wif water...sesame oil wif your normal food...dats all i can think of at the moment. in chinese medical terms..our body becomes "cold" after birth or MC..so you must "heat" it up by eating all these. i never stay indoors at all...on the same dae i went out to play pool oredi..me still alive n kicking...hehe cheer up and dun think so much yah!!..

linda...
i am glad you kick the habit...coz of stress of the first one...i picked it up again..will try to cut down asap...bad for the baby to come...hehehe.tough job for me..after so many yrs..
 


hi chestnut,
5 days shld be jus nice...
happy.gif
i was given one week mc dat time... and i totally used the time to rest (and get away from work for a while!! hehe...).
 

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