Support group - Miscarriages

Hi Christine, you've been very strong. Press on but do give yourself and hubby a break at times. Sometimes little pleasures do add spark to a relationship.

Hi ladies, this is indeed an episode that we do not wish to be reminded of. Even though it has been a few months, it is still hard to come to terms with the loss.
 


Hi Christine,

Great to hear that you and hubby have a good talk and have sorted things out.

Try not to worry too much and take things 1 at a time.

Jiayou!


Hi May,

Indeed this is an episode which is best put behind. Take good care!
 
Hi ladies
I wrote here 2 weeks back, saying that I will wait for a natural miscarriage. But my body wasn't gonna do it on it's own and after 2 weeks from diagnosis, dr said can't wait anymore and I had to do a 'wash' and so i did it. It has been an extremely emotional period and I'm still trying to get over it.

Thanks ladies for all your kind words, was wondering if I can join u ladies here. I want ttc soon again after seeing what my Gynae says at my followup checkup.

Saw a few ladies here also at the nov MTB thread. I was also there for awhile. Let's get well soon k?
 
Chris, glad that you've sorted out with hb. Dun be too harsh on urself... Is ok to indulge urself once in awhile de
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May n Ashley, I was super down awhile back and some of the ladies here have encourage me to have positive thoughts and also to keep myself busy. It works ! There are still some down moments on and off but am able to rebound quite fast now. So jia you too !
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Ladies, my 3rd AF is due soon. Having mix feelings about it, happy that am a step closer to tcc but yet, still not ready emotionally. Haiz lousy feeling ... :S
 
Ashley, I've had my wash 2 weeks ago as well and no doubt unless one go through it and experienced, its hard to know how we felt. Nevertheless, the best thing is pick yourself up again, get your health back into top shape asap so that you are ready for baby again. Take heart because like me, I realised I am not alone and have girls like you and me for support!
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mommytq
i have been keeping myself bz, but everytime i'm alone, i still cry. the loss is so great. i know i'll get better with time.... at least your 3rd AF is here soon and you can ttc again. your gynae asked u to wait after 3 cycles? i heard my gynae saying something like this but my mind was so blank the last time cause i was in to do the wash and couldn't register anything.

pigy
have you seen your gynae for followup after the wash? yes, i'm going to see gynae in a week plus time and after that, i'll start to get back to shape to try again. stock up on folic acid and vitamins. who knows, we can meet again at the next mtb thread,
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we must jiayou ok? talking to you girls have really made me feel better. sometimes, i just feel like nobody understands what i'm going through, not even my mum, as long as they have never experienced a miscarriage.
 
Dana > thank you. i've sort of put the episode behind though there are times i'll be reminded of it. have stopped crying, and looking forward to my next bb.

gynae have given me the go ahead to ttc but we have put it on hold for now as both me and hubby had been down with flu for quite a while.

this support group has been helpful in allowing us to 'talk' about our mc and this somehow bring us to come to terms with it.
 
Hi Ashley,

I underwent exactly what you've been thru. It seemed to me that my bb died twice. It was a horrible feeling. I am still trying to overcome my grief.

I just did my wash on Monday. Am wondering when my bleeding going to stop.
 
Ashhley & Stressed, I've just went for my follow up on MOnday. Bleeding stopped exactly after 1 week. DOc also nvr say anything...Only my auntie and mama says stay away from cold drinks at all costs and all ''cooling'' food...ya..me must get back to shape physically and ''strong'' for baby also.

Stressed, the bleeding will stop. No point worrying about something you can't do anything to change, so ''ignore it''.
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Stressed
Your nick also familiar, from nov mtb thread? Yes, it's like i'm griefing over a death of a loved one. But it has gotten better for me, i was an emotional wreck the first few days, now it's a week since the wash and i'm feeling more optimistic. actually i had 2 weeks before my wash to come to terms with my loss because i waited to be sure and wanted to miscarry naturally. but didn't happen. i did my wash last friday and i stopped bleeding totally last night, so it's roughly a week. why did you say your bb died twice?

pigy
okie, think i read mostly drs will ask to wait 3 months. but it's up to you when to try again, must be emotionally and physically ready.
 
i reme stressed from nov thread... i am sorry for your loss.

i stopped bleeding the day after dnc, then now and then still spotting and a gush of menses-like blood for 2 days this week, called my clinic, the assistant said is normal and might go on for 1-2 mths. i sure hope not, hopefully menses will come asap.

I am due for my checkup next Tues, sigh like you, my mind is in a total blank when told my baby's heartbeat stop. i will check with my gyne as to when can try ttc, 3 months is a good guide.

cant help but wish my baby is still with me...sigh silly thoughts, have to constantly remind myself everything happens for a reason.
hang in there ladies
 
Thanks girls for all the support! I hope miracles happened... After 24th this month i will know if my angel is back to me. Hopefully she will...

Ashley: its important to keep your mind positive so that you will recover fast. Do a confinement, start taking pre natals pills or multi vitamins, fish oil n royal jelly. Try drinking red raspberry tea leaf to tone your uterus. And regulate your period..

Take up exercises... It really helps alot... You sweat out you will feel better.but start only after your confinement and after your follow up. I started exercising 3 weeks after dnc.

So, its up to you to decide when your body will be ready...

Waiting for 3 cycles before ttc is a long wait for me.. But still i pull thru this period n now i ttc-ing...

So, be positive, things will be well very soon. Since bb has gone to heaven, we have to be happy for them. They are not suffering anymore.

Think about it, when bb has no hb, that proves that bb wasnt fully developed, do u wish to have your child to come to this world without being normal?

Our child doesnt want us to spend our whole lifetime n money on their disorder. They want to be born healthy. Therefore they chose to come back the next time round.

We odd to be happy that our angels sacrifice for our future. So smile for their departure. So that they will be happy in heaven.

Dont worry... Your bb is playing with our bbs in heaven.. They are having fun...
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just wondering is DnC prices is fixed among the docs? i signed up for package for 650 and paid in full at 7 week, my doc converted the 650 to his DnC fees.
 
3 months is the safety zone to ttc again... So, hang on, just pray that your af comes on time very month.

That was what i did. I pray hard that it comes on time every month.

Sharon mention, if during our af our blood is fresh red means we are very healthy. So keep track of it.

Is most of the time your bleed is fresh red that shows u are clean, healthy n rcovering very well!

Eat lots of spinach. And true to avoid all cold drink n cold food. I still take watermelon once in a while but just a slice or two.

It has been 5 months since my dnc, n i still did not drink a single cold drink or food. My main drink now is water. My main food now is veggies n fish.

But for th sake of my child, i am willing to do that!
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so ladies stay strong n tough.

You got to win this battle n start afresh. There are too many things u cant predict.

Just by looking at all the disasters. We are fortunate enough.
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Babydust to all!!
 
Lingie; yup, its around there. My doc charged me around there too. My hospital fees was around 800bucks. I got two docs doing it for me, each doc is $280. Then the rental of the surgery room, equipments... My total billing is $1098.
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Hey Ashley,

I felt like my bb died during the first time the doc informed me and told me it will naturally flush out. Died a 2nd time on D and C. Being reminded twice of the loss is like saying my bb died twice.

My bill cost me $1.5k. Lucky my husband's insurance pays for it.
 
linggie
now my greatest wish is for my mensus to come, and to come regularly too. the nurse told me my wash was around $700+ and can pay by medisave, so i signed the medisave form but haven't received statement yet.

christine
thanks for your kind words, and i will take up on your advice to start on the pre-natal vitamins etc and diet. it's good practice whether ttc or not. just that now, it's still hard to be positive, but i guess time heals all wounds. i'm waiting for my time to pass...

stressed
oh yes, i know what you mean. 3 weeks back when my dr informed me, i also grieved. and now after the wash, it's another form of grieving. it's grieving for closure. still feel like a part of my heart is taken away with my bb gone.
 
Thanks Christine...
Anyway r u from Dr Lim's clinic?
coz i saw ur post at his thread....

I'm also under Dr Lim... =)

anyway im trying to be strong.. especially infront of my hubby and frens...
And i keep thinking of my fav food and drink to cheer myself up... (Bubble tea.. Medium rare steak.. chili crab) HAHA....
 
Ying > yes yes the first positive i have is that i can now indulge in my favourite medium rare steak, sashimi, raw oysters, oyster omelette, laksa with cockles... the list is simply endless.

Ling > Not sure if D&C prices are fixed, mine was $2k.
 
Christine Koay....I can't imagine myself without cold drinks for so many months...

Qin...I know it takes times to heal but hope you wont ponder over it soon not good for yr health.

Ashley, same here..for first time in my life, I wish my menses will come asap also! hahah

Don't think I will wait 3 mths...maybe will start trying again after 2 months..

Girls, think positive. Take it our experience will help to encourage others, also we be much more experienced in handling it in our next pregnancy.
 
just had a can of Kickapoo... tonight wanna drink bubble tea.. argghzz can't imagine im going for my dnc tomolo... =(

anyway i gotta do confinement for how long huh?
when can i start exercise again?
 
ooh i did dnc the next day after finding out, everything sort of passed in a blur. but everytime i have to talk abt it, my tears will swell...1 thing i learnt keep the pregnancy hush hush because sharing bad news is just too painful

may- 2k is high! my doc's fees is 650 then the other part of the fees is charged by TMC (i think 700? can claim by medisave. Did you do at GE or Mount E?

ying--do take care after the proecdure, eat and rest well
 
Yingoinkoink...maybe rest will know how long.can share also?.But i didn't really do mini confinement..I just stay out of cold stuff.

I am waiting till the 2 weeks after checkup are up then I resume my exercise. Meanwhile, my mum instructed me not to carry too heavy stuff.
 
qin
i also did my wash 1 week ago, still feeling sad. but i'm sure things will get better as time passes.

yingoinkoink
i also didn't really do confinement. just eat more 'bu' food, and stay away from cold/liang drinks and rest more. our body needs time to heal.

pigy
yeah, me also anxious to start ttc. but i'll wait and see what gynae says first at my followup. so still pending...
 
ashley, do keep us update of ur follow up what your gynae says ok?

hmm...not sure of my breakdown of D&amp;C, but the stay at KK is <$500. AIya but if include the consultation and initial scanning before D&amp;C thing, my hubby was signing away saying "Need to be ok financially before trying for baby. No baby already spent almost $1k liao.
 
My D&amp;C cost me ard $850..($200 for anesthetics)
and I already spent almost $1100 for consultation + blood test and medicine... =(
so I already spent $2K for nothing.... haiz..
 
Just wondering....how old are you girls here? I think also cos of my age...I am already 34 this year reaching 35 thats why body reaching differently from girls in their 20s.
 
Pigy: confinement is very important. Without good confinement it will affect us in future.

Ladies,

For spotting i doubt it will take so long to stop leh.. My gynae say the max. Should be 2 weeks of spotting. Bleeding is just few hours or a day long.

My spotting stopped around day 5. N i spotted for a few days before my first af came. And no more spotting after that.

My af came 5 weeks after dnc. My confinement lasted for 2 weeks. But i avoided having sex for 6 weeks. Bad for the husband.
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And i ttc after 3rd cycle. Which my doc advice to be the best. To avoid any complications esp. Another mc to happen.

My whole billing is cheap i guess. My gynae check up added up to about $400 only.

I did claim my hospital bills though but not my clinic check up. Didnt keep all the receipt so cant claim.

Its very important to keep out processed food n drinks. It can cause infertility and will cause hormones inbalance.

We can indulge in food to keep our emotions controlled. But it may lead to depression too. If u depend on food to keep your emotions calm.

Its fine to tear... But i think the best is really go on a short trip. Relax. Somewhere nearby. Msia or something.

Im sure all of us can pull thru this emotion rollercoaster.
 
Pigy: im 23 this yr...i do agree my body recovers rester n better... But of cos with hard work too.

Everyone of us can be as healthy. But due to stress at work or at home. Its hard to be so healthy.

But we have to try though.
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OO...all of you are still so young! So don't need to worry like me!
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errr.havn't consider going TCM yet, thought of giving the body a break before I feed it with more medicine.
 
pigy > come on, you're still younger than me
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i'm in late thirties, first bb mc. i take simple tonic soup that i brew at home.

for this pregnancy, i had already spent about $3k before mc. with the d&amp;c bill, total spent is about $5k. definitely not cheap.
 
I spend slightly more than $1k already, including the initial scans plus the evac.

Pigy
I'm 28. U not old lah, still young. Age is but a number. Most impt is be healthy.
 
Pigy: for me, my confinement i didnt bath at all for the first week. And eat only rice wine chicken soup and spinach. Or steam fish.

Everyday the same. Wear socks, gloves long sleeves, long pants. Everything cover up.

I just wipe myself with water that had been boiled before n warm rice wine...

Cannot eat over night food. Esp. Rice. Drink lots of tea brewed by my mum.

The ingredients are red dates, black dates, dry longans, ginger, dangshen.

I drank for one month. And started drinking dom few days after dnc. Drink it every night. Even until now, still drinkin it.

Then every twice a month i will brew herbal chicken soup. The herbs used are meant for warming my uterus n bu my body, my mum bought it for me. She spent $700 on it. But its a few months dosage. I drank for 4 months. Just finished the last dosage a week ago,

Quite good.. My body feels warm at night. And then carried on with abdomen massage with sharon. Twice every month. Also had my last massge last week.

The therapist helped me to stimulate my ovaries for better conciving.
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And then exercise everyday. Started exercise 3 weeks after dnc.

And start taking supplements 2 weeks after dnc. Took fish oil, royal jelly, selenium, pre natal pills, folic acid. Recently added bee pollen and CoQ 10.

Drank red raspberry tea leaf everyday. Used to drink three to four cups a day. Then after my second af, i cut down to one a day.

An now ttc-ing, i stop drinking. Cos will contract uterus.

That is how i go thru with my confinement till now.

Hope this helps with you ladies.
 
I agreewith ashley. Zoey tay of mediacorp she also late preggie.. But she gave birth to 2 healthy babies... So, all of us can do it too...

Its important to detox your body... If your body contain too much toxic, it will cause the baby not to be able to be well developed and therefore cause miscarriage.

So, detox before taking supplements. Cos if dont detox, supplements u take in will not be able to be absorbed into the body.
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Zoe has 3! I m taking tcm...

Christine- very disciplined!
I m hoping to start my yoga 2 weeks later...

Having difficulty trying to do massage hah bcos by the time I come home is 7pm lor sigh work is so stressful
 
Christine

How is the massage from Sharon? I book appt with her Nxt mon but I still spotting wor.

My Gynae say if by one mth spotting still haven stop I have to visit her again scared infection. Hope it is not the case. Pray hard.
 
Hi.. Wat type of massage is it huh?
How much is it per session? I'm quite interested... Heez
Oh God... 14 more hrs to go... N I gotta say bye-bye to my little 1... Arghz!!
 



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