Support group - Miscarriages

Elain, don worry so much for now. There might be good news. Think positive, it helps.

Droopy, don't get too tense up, not good for you. Learn to fang4 song1. Keep smiling.

Hamasaki, we just got back. HB enjoyed himself. For me it's 3rd time watching, enjoyed the silly shows by clowns and audience. You're still awake?
Me having mixed feelings, cos tmrw morn going to hospital to get the post-mortem report for Kaden.
 


hi coral, yes me still awake... surfing the internet...


I thought U are waiting for his report for some time already.. Izzit u're not prepared and ready emotionally..
 
Whao! You ladies are really late sleepers!

I guess ladies are worried just about everything. It is just inside us.

For my case, I know the worst is going to happen as I don't feel pregnant at all. Just waiting for the Dr to tell me what I should do next.
 
coral, do relax when u see the report...
and keep us update of it..
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Elaine, until then, dun hu si luan xiang for now.... you need to be positive now.. no matter what's the result....

Coral, I will.... let us know when you get the report....
 
elmo,
My AF finally arrived yesterday
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so happy when I see the 'red' coming-35 days after D&C. The flow is still consider quite normal like last time. phew.. at least quite accurate yah.
 
Good Afternoon Ladies,

Coral, u watched Quidam ah. I watched Saltimbanco & Alegera, felt they are more or less the same, so I skipped Quidam. Hee Hee...Yeah I am learning to relax
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Keep us updated with the report, do be strong, we are here to listen.

lala, great that yr AF is here. Planning to start TTC soon?
 
hi girls!
happy lantern festival!

coral, hope you are coping ok with the medical report. be strong ok? hopefully the getting the results will give you a proper closure and help you to move on.

GT, i'm 28 this year. my pregnancy - to cut the long story short, i was diagnosed with low amniotic fluid at 15 weeks and during detailed scan, my baby was detected with possible mulfunctional kidneys and was severely growth restricted. sought many opinions and did some procedures in hope to save my baby but finally heeded Henry's advice to terminate my pregnancy at 24th week. although we refused to take henry's advice initially to terminate at 20th week, went to seek many opinions and even went to infuse fluid, we had to admit in the end that he was right in his judgement afterall. we went back to him for termination, and he handled the situation well and was very sensitive to our feelings.

berrynice, actually i find henry's charges very reasonable, for his expertise and the technology that he is using. he specialises in gynaecologic endoscopy and his equipment are very advanced, capable to detecting the slightest abnormality. and he's one of the few gynaes around that specialise in fetal maternal medicine (high risk pregnancy). other established doctors in this field include Dr George Yeo (KKH), Dr TC Chang(Thomson), Dr Ann Tan(Mt E), Dr Selina Chua. I've seen 3 out of the 4 during my pregnancy and my conclusion is that Henry is still the best. In fact, Dr Henry told me he was Dr Ann Tan's mentor in SGH and he was the one who delivered 3 of her babies. but comparing the charges, Dr Ann is at almost 2 times more expensive than Henry!
 
Saw the gynae. We were told we lost our bb due to some virus infection like common cold virus, but in our case not sure which virus, as the more common ones are found to be not present, and it's going to cost a fare bit to test for the really rae ones, so the hospital did not proceed. But according to them, very high chance it's some very rare virus that attacked me during my preg. Prob due to my long stay in hospital or because I visited my cousin bb who had chicken pox... The doc told me to keep away from hospital, bbs and young children if I want to avoid such virus attack in future preg. He say it's a very very rare chance for such case to happen. Even lower than 2%, but I'm just so unlucky to be attacked. And good thing that Kaden wasn't brought to this world, cos the virus was attacking his lungs till they were bleeding internally, and the wind pipe from his throat to stomach were also bleeding. I feel so sorry that he was bleeding in me and I didn't know. He must have suffered abit, but only consolation is he's no longer in pain. I feel so angry that I lost my baby under such circumstances. Yet, I'm console by the fact that it's unlikely to happen again. My heart really ache to know that he was bleeding. My little bb was suffering when he was in me, that thought really kills me. I just hv to stop thinking of that and remeber that he's no longer in pain. In future just gotta be careful. Doc say my cervic is closed and recovering well. He sort of encourage me to try again. We told him when we're more prepared for it. He then did a pap smear for me. I also did a test to see if I'm immue to chicken pox, if not I'll take a vaccine.

Droopy, I watched Saltimbanco and Alegria too. But hb hasn't so brought him to watch Quidam. You're right, very similar.

Bellybutton, looks like our age quite similar. I'm 29. I think GT is turning 30 this sun.
 
hi bellybutton

this is wendy....just had my D&C @ 7wks pregancy...I had read your thread and you appear v strong and firm....i believe that is alot of of happines lies ahead of us, look ahead...

God bless

Wendy
Mother of 6yo gal....
 
Hi Droopy,
I may start TTCing after this period cycle. Gynae says can try anytime. So far I think my body recover quite fast after the D&C. I think my gynae did a good job too.

Do you gals believe that pregnant lady cannot attend wake/funeral or wedding or visit someone who has just given birth in hospital?
 
hi coral,
it was most unfortunate that such a rare thing will happen to you and your baby. i know, it must have hurt you so much to know that Kaden was actually suffering inside you without you knowing... but the good thing is that at least he is no longer in pain now..

and take heart that it is sporadic and lightning will most likely not strike the same spot twice..
same for me, although i didn't do a post mortem, i think it was due to a cold that i caught when i went taiwan for a business trip right after my first trimester.
well.. we just have to take this as a costly lesson learnt. let's ground ourselves the next time we get pregnant, keep away from crowd and really exercise lots of caution. that's what i tell myself, won't take things for granted anymore..

and now that you know what is the real reason, i hope this will help you close this unhappy chapter and move on. at least you know God is gracious to let everything happen the way it did. can you imagine how things would be if Kayden is born into this world with internal bleeding and had to suffer a lot more pain? that's what i always tell myself. things happen for a reason. I may not know why but one day when i meet my baby girl in heaven, i will know that God is gracious afterall.

Wendy, yup, no point dwelling in self pity, and yes, i believe we all will be mothers of beautiful children some day. for now, we just have to hang on to this hope and move on. your girl is 6 already? wow.. that's fast..
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you be strong too, one day your girl will have a beautiful brother/sister to play with her.

lala, personally i dun believe that pregnant lady cannot attend wake/wedding/visit someone who has given birth. but i believe in staying away from crowd or hospital that may have virus and harm the foetus! that's more scientific.. heheee.
 
to all beautiful ladies out there,

yes, agree with bellybutton....life has to move on...

i might be a 2nd time mother but it still hurt me and my family....my gynae did told me that things did happen for a reason. Imagine, if the bbs are out from our womb, it will be more painful for us to see them going thru the pain...

Now, i pray to God that my bb is good in his hand(i m not a christian)and believe soon, another bb will come along ...every child is special...

ladies, after confinement, stop indulge and asking "whys"..we should be taken more extra care on our health instead...

ciaos
wendy
 
Hi Coral,
I dunno what to say, but it's not your fault for not knowing.... anything can happen during a pregnancy.... and I also believe tat everything happens for a reason and we will not be able to comprehend now...
Take comfort that Kaden is free from all sufferings now...'
Be strong *Hug*

Lala, good to hear that u are recovering well and fast... me still waiting for AF to come.. :p
Continue to eat and rest well...
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Wendy, good to hear that you are taking it in your stride... continue to focus on good thots...yes, I believe all of us here will have bbs of our own very soon.
 
hi coral, feel so sad when reading the report of bb Kaden..

Hope U will recover and bring a closure to it..


Be strong.. We'll be here for u...
 
elmo,

sorry didn't log in yest!I am fine!
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ok i know that i shd eat more bu...bought some macaroni on sat so this week can try cook lunch....

now i dun have any bleeding nor spotting liao leh...bt still wear pad in case the bleeding suddenly comes...so normally my AF will come about one month after my D&C....

hamasaki,

thank you!!
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I shd be happy with all my closed ones with me...shd be positive!!

bellybutton,

I think i read through the archives of this thread and saw your posting...really...i felt that u are a very strong girl...i actually told my hubby....how can GOD do this to us?....actually i was very emotional on my birthday...it is like why did GOD give me a bb only to take it away???!!i rather HE didnt give me in the first place....
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I rather keep on trying and trying....and finally get a healthy bb...

GT,

Happy Birthday to you!!!
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I tell myself to be positive but still cry once in awhile when I think about it.

I agree with you Choo. I rather keep trying and trying and finally have a healthy bb. But I guess in a way, it is better for the bb to be taken away now then when he/she is born. By then he/she may have to suffer more. ;(
 
hi beautiful,
Dr Henry has 2 clinics. One at Bishan and the other at GlenE. He rotates between the two clinics, so better to call up the nurse and make appointment beforehand. Bishan tel: 65527377 GlenE: 64732533
i didn't ask him how old he is, but my guess is he's in his mid 40s. i think consultation depends on what he does for you. I rem my first consultation with ultrascan and medicine in my 8th week was about $80.

choo, i was feeling the same way with God too. Being a Christian who knows that God loves His children and never fails them, I find it hard to comprehend why this could happen to us... talked about faith, my hubby was full of faith and we really trusted Him to protect our child. yet it had to turn out this way in the end. we simply dun understand why God would give us a daughter that we asked for yet in the end He takes it away. If we are not meant to have this child, then He shouldn't even give it to us in the first place! that was not the worse, with all the odds against us, we had to grapple with the decision of ending her life. how we wished it was a case of black and white, like a m/c and we had no choice. in such a circumstance, we rather we had no choice, than to have to choose to end our own child's life. imagine the guilt that we would have to live with for the rest of our lives.

hence we were both angry with God. well, that was a few months back. we are slowly coming to terms with the loss, and I have to keep telling myself that there is a reason why God allowed such things to happen. maybe like coral, my angel was also suffering inside me and it was for the good of everyone to let her go. for now, i can only accept these as the past and move on. yes, something good did come out of it, ie my hubby and I became closer as a result, and we have learnt not to take things for granted. but all these came with a heavy price. If i keep asking why, there is no answer and i think one day i will go mad. so better to just accept it and move on.
 
Hi BellyButton,
I have the same feeling as you too. Both hubby & myself have been praying for so hard to have a bb. Finally our prayer is answered & God has created a bb in my womb. While I was pregnant, we also prayed very hard that the foetus will be growing normally & healthily & also pray that my womb will be strong enuf to hold the bb. We felt so blessed during my preg period. Even my Bible Cell members & leaders have been praying for us. Then came suddenly the light spotting & no heartbeat. It really makes me angry with God that why in the 1st place He created this 'hope' for us & now everything is gone. I must admit that I did lose my faith during the down period. But my hubby keep reminding me that we must continue to have faith in Him. So now I tend to be more positive again.

Now that my menses has come, at least I can start my TTc cycle again
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HI Bellybutton,

Thank you so much for the info! I'll see Dr Cheng when I succeed in TTC. Just had my 2nd cycle but found it to be rather puzzling. It would come (light flow) and then stop and then after about 12 hours, it would flow again. It was like this for about 5 days! Asked my aunt who is a nurse and she said that it's probably due to stress at work and too much running around. THis really proves to everyone how stress can mess up the hormones in our body. Maybe I'll wait for another cycle to see if the body normalises the hormones before really TTC.

Hi Lala,
The stuff that you mentioned about pregnant ladies shouldn't attend wedding, funerals etc.... well, I kinda believe it. At first I brushed all these as superstitions and that there's no scientific proof. However, one of my colleagues had her wedding in June and I attended it. And then, IT happened! Not sure if it's just pure coincidence but the next time I'm preggie, I'll just avoid crowded places, weddings, baby's first month etc etc... Maximum security -- what old ladies tell me NOT to do, I'll NOT do it. Better be safe than sorry!
 
Goodmorning ladies. Atv the lounge waiting to board in 45mins time.

Yes, I'm sad about my lots but am determine to move on. Takes time thoug. Everymight I dream of different adventure and there's always a little boy abt 2-3yrs old in my dream. And everytime there's a chance for me to do something for him. Perhaps it's my sub conscious mind that's pmaying the trick on me. Been thinking of what I can do for my son, thus these dreams.

Bellybutton, I was upset and did not understand whay this happened too. Then I tell myself, perhaps I'm just not ready and well=prepared, this is a way to make me and hb better parents. So bb left to wait for us to be ready before he comes back. I miss him and wish that he'll be back to be my bb soon. We'll love him forever.

Lyn, thanks for your tots. I'll learn to take better care of my health and not be too lazy to take my supplements.

Wendy, you're right. It's most impt to have a healthy body. I think that's the basic responsibility any parent should have.
 
Bellybutton, I shall learn to ask why too. It's a qn without any satisfactory ans. The fact that my boy has to leave us, left nothing to be satisfactory. No ans can make me feel better. I just have to accept it even if I don't like it. Life is never the same again, or I should say I'm never the same. At least I really learn how to take care of myself and those around me. I cherish life and relationship alot more than before. This episode make me realise alot of things. But like you say, it's a big big price to pay. I shall earn him back again. And yes, I'll take comfort that things could be worse. Let's wait for the good news for each of us here.
 
hi Choo,
yes... normally AF will comes in about a mth (+/-)after D&C....
if today, no more bleeding, can start BU liao...

Hi lala/bellybutton,
I know how you feel... cos I also went thru the same stage... Initially when I was preggy, I was so happie....and delighted with God.. cos I had been praying so hard for bb as well... but in the end, I have to go thru so much to finally end the whole episode... initially I started asking "Why God give and then take it away".... and I start to question as well...

After the whole episode, I have been doing a lot of soul searching... God is testing us... he is using this as a test of our faith... we should be faithful to God no matter what happens....not only when good things happen to us, but also when bad things.... that is the strength of faith... and believe that everything happens for a reason....
Read bible on Job....
I know it's hard...cos I also fall all the time.. but continue to pray and I'm sure we will all be mummies of lovely children.
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Life will not be easy, but takes courage and believe that God gave us the ability to overcome our problems.... now most impt is to take good care of ourselves....and have positive thots.
 
Hello ladies...I just came back from the Doc. Did another blood test. Ai....now both my arms are bruised. The last one I did on Fri, shows that I am pregnant. But seriously don't feel pregnant at all. I also did another scan. This time we can see something else too. I've a 3cm fibroid.

Will be going back to the Dr this Friday again.

Yes, life is not easy and we have to overcome our problems amd take good care of ourselves!
 
Hello gals...
How's your mooncake festival? I have been so busy till I forgot to buy mooncakes this year for my house... haha.. Only bought to give other pple but forgot about myself...


Gals,
I think everything happens for a good reason
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. For my case, maybe I have not got myself settled in life and lost my direction... I will be given this gift again when I found my direction and knows what I really want. I cherish my family and hubby more now. I treasure and appreciate the things that I have now.
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Try to have happy thoughts and think positive
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It's not who you are, where you are, how are you, but what you think...

"Think and act cheerfully, and you will be cheerful."
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Jia you!
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hi lyn...
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I had abt 3 boxes of mooncakes left in my fridge.. Occupies the space.. (hb Kiasu) bought a few boxes of different flavours..


I was so happie yesterday.. I was on my way to my cousin's wedding and was inside the car.. Sudden, I juz looked up to the sky and I saw the moon.... WOW, it was sooo big and round.. SImply so nice and seems so near to me to hold...
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Coral have a good trip
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and take good care
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haha.. can see you are "addicted" to the forum like me liao... at waiting lounge also log in to see see.. haha.. I also like that...
 
Good day everybody!!

Yawn!!! So sleepy in office...yesterday early morning went to JB with HB. Reached home at nite...so tired. On our way back along PIE in the late evening...we saw a beautiful RAINBOW!!! WOW!! So clear & nice!
 
Coral,

bon voyage and have a good trip!
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good afternoon!
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last night after eating my mil's pig trotter and back home..suddenly felt very very moody..but i dun know wat is the real reason behind....
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tis morning woke up see the bad weather..and very negative again..

now eating instant porridge and milk...later hubby wil da bao from mil's hse..she cooking ginger zhu yao ruo and soup for me ...yummy!
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kinda of feel xian to go back to work on 28th sept..i cannot imagine the endless emails i am going to clear when i am back...plus some irriating colleagues who might come asking me more qns!!!I am supporting 4 bosses so can imagine how they will do if i am not ard..me out of office since 7th sept when i went for the last check up....

qwer,

so beautiful to see a rainbow!wish i can see now!so that i can appreciate life better after seeing such natural beauty!
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<font color="aa00aa">Hamasaki, Choo,</font>
Yes, indeed it has been ages since I last saw the rainbow! Yesterday was after dunno how many donkey years liao!
 
<font color="0000ff">Hamasaki,</font>
Wah u hv 3 boxes of mooncakes in your fridge! So much leh...for 2 of u...keke... I left 1 pcs of mooncake at home. I like to eat but I try not to eat too much cos scared heaty. I also like to eat the 'piglet'...keke...
 
hi qwer
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.. at first it was 4 boxes.. SO i told hb to quickly finish up 1 or 2 boxes so there are some plc inside the fridge..


But he wanna slowly enjoy the other flavours so still stuck at 3 boxes till now.. (my god)
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...


Piglet... ahhahahaha.. I can't bear to eat them up.. so cute...
 
<font color="ff0000">Hamasaki,</font>
Keep in the fridge...hmmm....yours must be the 'bing pi' one lor? I prefer the traditional mooncake, only eat the plain 'nian rong' filling &amp; not others, keke.... Wah, then u must help your HB eat lor....then can finish fast fast mah...
 
hello hamasaki...
Wah.. the moon is so nice hor?
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Last nite, I went to MIL for dinner and kapok some mooncake home.. kekeke... then come home cut mooncake and make tea eat with hubby
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yes Lyn... the moon yesterday is the 1st time ever that make me go Gaga and WOW...


It was really so huge and round and was so near to and not those which was far away from the sky .....(ai yoh, dunno how to say)



what a sweet moment u had with ur hb...

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aiyah! i forgot to look at the moon yesterday!! now have to wait another year.. so angry with myself.
wow lyn. you had such a romantic time with your hubby. eat mooncake and drink tea under the moonlight..
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i'm happy to see that you are so positive! all the way girl! hm..better enjoy as much "er ren si jie" as you can now. coz next time when you have bb, you won't have that much time for each other!

qwer, i love rainbows! but long time never see already. you lucky girl!

coral, g'day mate! how are things down under??.. enjoying yourself? sydney your HQ or subsidiary? so what's your task there? btw, what's your profession? hee.. lyn is rite! you looked on this site man! can't believe you are still writing when you are in the lounge!
 
Hi pple, been a long time since i logged on for support and encouragement.
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Coral, reading your post abt Kaden really makes me sad but then be brave as i believe god has his reason for everything he does. One thing for sure Kaden is in God good hands now. Enjoy your trip..
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Bellybutton, no worries abt the full moon lar. nxt mth u can also see full moon on the 15th mah.. keke
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Hamasaki, seems like u have enjoyed your Lantern festival huh.

Lyn, glad to have u back too..!!
 
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hello Gardeline.. Well, yesterday was a nice day..

Juz seeing the big round moon makes my night so happie that I couldn't fall asleep..
 
Gd morning ladies,
Ladies, I'm bit worried 2day. Juz wan2 check with u all...does any1 experience lots of blood clots dropping out during AF? 2day is my CD2, juz now while I was walking, I felt some blood clots dropping out. Then I went toilet checked &amp; noticed lots of clots on my pad! Then some more keep flowing out. I'm scared...shocked too!
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I wonder if it's normal?
 

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