Support group - Miscarriages

[hamasaki]

hi tubby, thanks for yr advice.. i will check it with my doc when i got the chance..
Me also scared that it might have some side-effects to it..

huh nyny, what website are u looking for.. are u talking abt the herbs website.. its given to me from Adora..


hi Java

thanks for yr tips.. will remember it..

But then , i still thinks i will not take all those kinds of herbs before and during pregnancy to play safe..

 

[joycesprit]

Hi missylee, thx for your well wishes.

Wish you the best also

 

[pregnantbride2b]

I oso think better not take those herbs just to play safe... Blood circulating herbs can cause early miscarriage...

nyny,
How's the checkup? Do be strong...

missy,
You have a referral letter from a polyclinic to KKH rite? Did the doc specifically state that you gotta go to the sub-fertility clinic?
I just got a referral from polyclinic to KKH a few days ago. My appointment will be on 17 Jan to see a gynae at O&G. I am getting a bit KS...

 

[pregnantbride2b]

Where is everybody?

I am pretty bored today staying at home to plan the wedding schedule and the details... Going out for dinner in town soon with my hubby's "xiong di"...

Wonder how's Oceans and baby Cherish...

K, I will be offline for the weekends... Tomorrow is my birthday

and Sunday "guo da li"...

 

[hamasaki]

Hi ULN, U are going to see a gynae on 17 Jan for what reasons.. Hope everything is fine for U..


An early Happy Birthday to U ULN.. May all yr dreams and wishes come true on this special day..

 

[decimalpoint]

hi i have not been able to come to the thread since i went back to work. working late, go home continue to work. today very sad, decided to kick my work one side to come and read.... so many posts already, cannot catch up... i predict i will probably disappear after this cos of work...

feel terrible today. pardon me, i feel like letting off, but i dunno who to go to cos no one knows about the m/c, and i dun want to start the story and get the sympathies.

i went back to see dr for post d&c checkup, all was well, but lining still very thin, so probably AF will not come so soon like previously, 28 days. sien, means hav to wait longer before can try again. i dun understand why the dr say the report shows that there is no object of conception found, but before the D&C we could see the sac using the scan. the thing that i passed out the night before, what's that then? i forgot to ask the dr abt it, though i spent $65 to send it for testing. sigh... i didn't ask much, somehow when i went to the clinic, i suddenly feel very sad. i thought i had recovered but apparently not. everybody else had husbands to go with them, but i was alone. i could see them brimming with joy. this couple even had a small album to hold all the ultrascan pics, and the lady keep taking it out to see, and shared her joy with her husband. i must hav had the glummest face in the whole clinic this afternoon. i went home and keep thinking abt the baby that i used to have and couldn't stop crying. sigh.....

sorry for such a "sao xing" post amid all the excitement here. really dunno where to turn to.

 

[pregnantbride2b]

Hi hamasaki,
Thank you for the well wishes...
I have endometriosis which affect the fallopian tubes which can lead to infertility. My gynae recommended a course of 3 injections, but I do not like injections, so I have declined.

I am going to KKH as a subsidised patient just in case I am really infertile, or if I ever conceive and have problems with future pregnancy.

I visited my gynae just before Christmas and I did not get good news. I was very sad

and have kept myself busy

to stop thinking. He warned me that there's a possibility that what happened might recur if I get pregnant again.

I told myself I cannot just think about it and be sad... I gotta do something...

I have collected my wedding photo album... very nice

It's my birthday present

 

[pregnantbride2b]

Hi decimalpoint,
Hugs...

Hope you feel better after crying...
I still feel sad and think about my loss when I go to my gynae and see so many pregnant ladies. Ever since my miscarriage, I visit my gynae alone. I see many go as couples, and I dun feel good too. I can understand how you felt... Will sms-ing ur hubby while waiting help ? I will sms my hubby while waiting and keep myself busy reading the magazines... It does helps me not to think too much and envy others. In my last visit, I got bad news... I was alone and I felt very sian for the rest of the day and went for a walk along Orchard.
Did you take the what you had passed out for test or the products of D&C for test? I have read that the implanted egg can get "absorbed" by the body in missed miscarriages.
Hope you will rest well during the weekend...

Try to think positive and listen to soothing music

That's what I do when I feel sad...

 

[hamasaki]

i see ULN.. do take extra care of yrself.. Really want to hear good news from U after yr check-up with KKH.. DO keep us update..

I believe U will get pregnate and i hope U will have faith in yrself that everything will gonna be alright..

Dun forget that I will Jia You for U.. Maybe we might got the chance to graduate at the same timing..

hi ULN and decimal, i know how U gals have felt.. Me still thinks of my lost baby and sometimes do cry esp these 2 mths, I'm feeling quite bad as if he is alive, His birthday will be in this mth..

 

[positiveme]

Hi ULN
Do not be disheartened
I have a gf who had Endo too & she undergone some ops & later she chose to go IVF
& now she's healthy pregnant
she only try IVF once

Don't give up any hope
Nothing is impossible if you don't give it a try

 

[java]

Hi ULN,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! Stay happy, positive and cheerful yah? Although your gynae say that there's a possibility of a recurrence if u shd get pregnant again, but there's also the possibility of it NOT recurring again. Have faith and hope, tell your body to fight it!

hi decimalpoint,
We have all experience this before, the roller coaster of emotions. Feel free to tok to us, I promise you that you will feel better as time goes by.

Dear gals,
This morning my nose bled. Past few days I was having a bad case of flu, but I refuse to take any medication. I'm very paranoid when it comes to taking medicine esp from normal GP during pregnancy. This week is my 34th week, the same week I lost Jordan in 2003. Pls pray for me that I will breeze thru this week smoothly. Thanks.

 

[hamasaki]

hi Java, yes i will pray for U..
Everything will be alrite and fine.. Dun think too much on the bad things..

Be positive.. U will carry on yr pregnancy as normal and soon a healthy baby will be in yr arms..

May God Bless U..


Happy Birthday ULN.. Gong Xi Gong Xi !!

 

[tiny]

Hello girls,
First of all, Happy Birthday to ULN! Enjoy yourself and hope your wedding preps are all in order.

Decimalpoint, i know exatcly how u feel...hugz...during my 1st pregnancy my hubby hardly came along with me as well, and i remember the day my gynae told me there was no heartbeat, and that it looked like a missed miscarriage, and i felt so alone and so lost! But this time round, he has been coming along for most of my gynae visits and i'm really v glad about it. I'm sure when u next get pregnant, your hubby will also make it a point to be there. Going thru this together will also make your bond stronger. Take things one day at a time ok?

Java, will remember u in my prayers esp at this time. You'll pull thru, don't think too much ok?My nose has been bleeding a bit too. not really bleeding, but my 'noseshit' (!) has been red and bloody! Anyway do take care of that flu. Rest more and take ur vitamin C!

Had my gynae visit this morning. surprisingly i didn't put on much since my last visit before Christmas! I thought all the feasting the last 2 weeks would make my weight escalate. but in the end only put on 1/2kg, and baby is now 2.55kg. then my gynae stuck his hand (or fingers?) in - i didn't dare to look!! to check my pelvis, and he said that baby's head was rather low already. eeks..so scary. i think that's the same way they check for dilation??!!??

 

[decimalpoint]

thanks girls... happy birthday ULN. i believe the creator of this world is fair, he won't give all the good things to one person. we lose some, we gain some in other ways. maybe the time is not right yet. have faith. i did send the tissue i passed out for test, but i just forgot to ask the dr. the D&C they did a test but indicated no object of conception, that's y i am confused as the scan did show the sac near the cervix opening. i was just too upset to ask any questions yesterday.

hamasaki and java, thanks too. i only come here when i hav no one to turn to, very bad... thanks for the encouragement. with my crazy workload, maybe that's y my ovulation is not back to normal yet. when i had my D&C, my dr said my cycle should be back to normal soon but the visit yesterday doesn't seem so. i am really anxious to try again, but judging from my emotional state now, maybe i am not ready. i dunno. i seem to hav a delayed down period. i was feeling quite fine after the D&C all the way until yesterday. n it's all the way down today.

tiny and java, dun worry abt the nose bleed. the cold weather may be causing it too as the blood vessels contract. my husband will be very guilty if he saw my post abt being alone at the clinic! he has been very supportive, i didn't want him to rush to be with me. sigh...

 

[hamasaki]

hi decimal point, U're welcome gal.. do come to this thread often..

Pls relax and rest well.. its not good to be feeling stress-up esp: when u just had a D & C done..

I hope U will take good care of yrself by building up on more vits and tonic food.. Maybe rest for a while now before trying again.. Give yr body some time to rest well..


May God Bless U..

 

[millie]

nyny, how's the checkup? i just read ur postings and i pray that everything went well with u. i had a similar situation like u and it didn't go well for me. but i remember that linda had a similar situation but it was a misculculation of date and she's now the proud mother of a baby girl. i pray that u got gd news and u r resting well!

java, my thoughts and prayers are with u. don't worry, all will go by smoothly this wk.

decimal point, it is normal to feel upset. i still have my sudden burst of depression up till now. we must be strong ok. i went for follow-up checks alone most of the time and i past my time by reading. what's most impt now is to rest well. i know that ur work is hectic and so, u shld relax more over the wkend. we were advised to try only after the 3rd cycle after d&c. so for the time being, remain positive and take care of ur health!

ULN, happy birthday! don't be sad. be positive and u'll become a mother! we will all be ok!

missylee, how are u? we jia you together!

odie, long time no see! so fast u 16 wks liao! do keep us updated!

 

[odie]

Nyny, how are you? Hope that everything is going well for you.

ULN, happy belated birthday!!! Miracles do happen. Stay positive ok? I always believe that staying positive helps in many ways.

Java... keeping fingers crossed for you. Have confidence... pretty sure that you will surf through this week smoothly.

Decimal... yup I agree that you need more time for now to get yourself back together first before you TTC again. Otherwise it will be extremely emotional if you need to handle a loss and a new pregnancy both at the same time. There is a time for everything... for now what you need to do is let yourself recover a little.

Tiny... I have heard about the same painful experience from my ex-colleague when she was about to give birth. It is something which I am not quite looking forward to. BTW... according to this ex-colleague of mine, her gynae stuck her whole hand through the vaginal -.-""

Hi Millie... yup. Time flies =) Lots of baby dust to you!!!!!

 

[hamasaki]

hi odie, the doc stuck her whole hand into yr ex-colleague vaginal.. Eekksssss man..

i would find it super uncomfortable and painful if it was me..


btw gals, do we have to undergo vaginal check-ups or scans during our 1st trimister.. I remember i did that before.. Dun like the feeling and this kind of check-ups..

 

[nyny]

hi gals
last week i went for ultrasound scan. the results still showed no heartbeat...
we decide to see gynae 2 weeks later and scan another time.

hi hamasaki,
ya, i really hate vaginal scan... it gives me irritating feeling.

 

[positiveme]

Hi nyny
i have similar case to you
I know its v stressful in such situation
Do not lose hope & pray to give you courage & support
take care

 

[folic]

Good morning gals, I am feeling very sleepy today...

nyny, sorry to hear that you still cannot detect the heartbeat. Did the doc mention whether the sac is bigger this time round?

decimalpoint, don worry about being a wet blanket here. We are all here to share and learn and grow. Do come in and vent whenever you feel like it. That's the whole purpose of this forum. It is normal to feel sad, envy, anger at preggie, especially when you have just lost your own so recently. As for your doc's report, I am jus guessing that perhaps what you had is a blighted ovum, meaning there is a sac but there is no foetus formed. This is also a common miscarriage reason for first trimester losses. I am sure you will slowly come to term with the loss and as you find your own closure to this loss, the negative feelings that you feel will also lessen. In the meantime, do come in more often and chat with us, ok? BIG HUGS!

Java, will be thinking of you during this week. As mentioned before, the nervousness and fear during this week is mainly psychological

Jus like me at week 23... But do relax.. this week will pass quickly. I am sure your little one will continue to give you the much needed assurance by kicking you regularly throughout this week. Keep yourself bz this week lah.. it helps!

Hi to everyone else! Hope everyone has a great week ahead! Am trying to get into the mood for Chinese New Year.. these few days like so depressing with all the Tsunami news reports... Hope 2005 and year of the rooster will be a bette year!

folic

 

[pageup]

hi ladies,

haven't login for a long time. My office server somehow blocked my access to this forum and I hardly get the chance to go online back home

Ocean, hope I'm not too late to congratulate you. Whatever you been through for the past few months is finally paid off by this sweet bundle of joy. Best wishes for you and your baby. Take care.

Sorry to see a few addition to this thread. For ladies who just been through D&C, try not to think about what and why such things happen to yourselves. Try to close this chapter, get well and try again. Remember don't blame yourself for what happened.

 

[nyny]

hi folic
no, the scan still detect that i was in week 5 which was same as the previous week.

 

[tiantian]

Hi gals,

ULN,
<font size="+1"><font color="ff0000">HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY</font></font>

Java,
I will pray for you.

I am very sure you will pass this week smoothly. Just relax, ok

Nyny,
So sorry that you still can't detect the heartbeat. Your case is very similar to mine. Gynae only found a sac at 5.5 weeks and 2 weeks later still cannot detect heartbeat and the sac size has reduced. I'll pray that you can detect the heartbeat 2 weeks later.

 

[nyny]

hi tian tian
thanks for the console. ya, we are hoping for miracle. if 2 weeks later the sac size really reduces, i guess, we should make a decision already....

btw, what's D&amp;C?

hi positiveme,
last time you sac and fetus also not growing?
when did you decide to terminate it? we are really lost... 'cos if there is miracle that we don't know and still go ahead with the termination, i feel that i am a killer....

 

[positiveme]

Hi nyny
mine is sac growing BUT cannot detect foetus
gynae advised no point to keep &amp; he gave me some pills to insert to dispel out the sac
bt i did give my bb some chances for him/her by delaying the procedure I waited a month or so
so why not wait for another 2wks then see how....
don't give up ist

 

[nyny]

hi +veme (lazy to spell, hehehe)
oh ok... we can see the sac and foetus. but just that there is no hearbeat and can't see it growing after 1 week...
so, meanwhile we still not give up hope, though my nausea and giddiness feeling subside a bit in these 2 days....

sigh..

 

[hamasaki]

hi nyny, i agree its super uncomfortable.. i'm hoping i will not have this kind of check-ups ever again..

hi nyny, i pray and hope a miracle will happen to U.. take care gal..

 

[erowen]

dear nyny, saw yr posting.
don't give up hope ya.
i can understand your feeling...but must stay strong.Even at this point in time for me, i'm afraid that my bleeding might come back. I'm just hoping for the best.
take care

 

[pregnantbride2b]

Hello gals,
I was busy on my birthday. Running around to buy things that I have not got for my "guo da li"

and hubby busy cleaning our love nest

. I did not celebrate my birthday but I got a present from my sis

Hubby has booked a villa at Indra Maya at Bintan Resorts

. We will be going there for a rest after the wedding...

I am looking forward to a relax trip to Bintan again...

Yesterday, I played with my cousin's baby for quite a while... making him laugh, making him cry, rocking him to sleep. He's 3 months and is so cute already.

I am thinking negative again this morning... I dun feel like doing anything but lie in bed and sleep... I will try to be positive

Hi Hamasaki, positiveme
Thank you for the encouragement and wishes

Hugs... We jia you togather...

Hi Java,
Thank you for the well wishes

I will keep you in mind and pray for you and your baby...

God bless...


Hi Tiny,
Thank you for the wishes

. Mayb your nose is too dry, and hence the bleeding... I had that quite frequently when I was overseas. Drinking more water will help...
Oh... stuck the whole hand?? Geesh... sounds uncomfortable and embarassing...

Hi Decimalpoint,
Thank you

I do understand how you felt... Maybe take it slowly and ask the doctor when you feel better. I also had no mood at all after the surgery to ask any questions till I felt better and take the facts slowly... Have a good rest and take care...

Hi milie and Odie,
Thank you

. I will try to stay positive...

 

[pregnantbride2b]

Hamasaki,
I did have lots of vaginal checks and scans... Every visits without fail... I still feel embarrassed...

Hi nyny,
I will pray for you that the heartbeat can be detected in two weeks time... Dun give up hope ok? Do come in here and release your stress... We are here to listen

Last time, for my case, oso cannot detect heartbeat. I went through D&amp;C at week 10, the next day after the scan which detected the sac was smaller than before.
D&amp;C is dilatation and currettage. For more information, http://www.alife.org.sg/en_d&amp;c.php

Hi tiantian,
Thank you the well wishes

...

 

[java]

wah so many postings today.

Tiny,
I also hate the feeling of vaginal checks. In my first preg, I had to have the gas mask on when the gynae stick anything into my vagina. It was very traumatising. Now, I'm not so afraid, coz the passageway already loosen liao.

hi nyny,
Don't give up hope. I really hope its just a miscalculation of dates. Do keep us posted.

I had a breakthrough today. I finally bought something for this bb. Bought a nursery organiser, a winnie-the-pooh comb and socks.

 

[missy_lee]

ULN, the dr at the polyclinic referred me straightaway to the subfertility clinic at KK coz i told her i've been ttc for a year ever since my miscarriage. i think that's the main reason why she send me there instead of seeing a gyn 1st. but then the word 'subfertility' really sounds depressing hor, sigh... i hope everything will turn out well. will update u gals after my appt.

hi nyny, i pray that u will be able to hear your bb's heartbeat very soon. meanwhile, don't think too much &amp; take gd care.

 

[nyny]

thanks gals. i will try to be +ve.

 

[tiantian]

ULN,
Yr big day is on 21st Jan rite?? which is next fri. Hmmm....think u should just concentrate on your wedding and not think of anything else.

Remember to

more and

more, then u will be very "mei mei" on your AD.

 

[yas]

Hi Ladies,
I'm new to this thread, previously I was from TTC thread. I've been trying since Nov 03 and finally managed to see a +ve last mth. But my happiness was short lived. My menses came 2 days later after testing +ve, gynae said it is a natural miscarriage.

Dont know if I'm suppose to take special food and tonic. Normally that is done only after giving birth rite?
Also not sure when to start trying again. My heart says try now but am afraid it will happen again.

Any advise?

 

[tiantian]

gals,
I also hate v-scan. Every visit sure kana one

Somemore my gynae is a male and everytime he got to use his fingers to "open up" the passage way 1st b4 inserting that thing in. So Paiseh

 

[nyny]

hi tian tian
huh? your gynae need to use his fingers.... my god!
i went to 2 gynaes, both of them nver used fingers leh.

really hate v-scan. but for abdominal scan, we need full bladder.... sometimes the gynae pressed so hard, it's also very uncomfortable....

i wonder in old days, ppl didn't have the scan technology, like my case, sac and fetus not growing, what can the doc do?

 

[hamasaki]

okie ULN, we jia you together.. Baby dust to all of us.. We will be proud mummys one day.. Take care gal and be happy cos yr wedding bells is ringing for U soon.

Hi ULN, wow vaginal check-ups every week.. i agree that its a bit embrassing and uncomfortable.. i'm scared of it..


hi missy, i pray that everything will be alright for U at the clinic.. hope baby news will come from U soon.. Baby dust to U gal..


hi tian tian, my previous gynae was a male too and just like what U said..

he also uses his fingers first.. I hate that, so I'm very determined to have a female gynae for my next pregnancy.. For sure must be a female..

 

[pregnantbride2b]

Hi Missy,
Have you tried TTC the "correct" way? Do you want to visit a volunteer from ALife? Their website is www.alife.org.sg. There are volunteers who are trained to teach and advice couples about TTC. There are people who tried for a long time but cannot conceive, then after heeding advice from ALife, got pregnant very fast... Jia you...

Hi Tiantian,
Yes... It's on 21 Jan

. Thank you.. Your post brighten me up and certainly put a smile on my face

. I am feeling very thirsty today and having sorethroat.. Just drank some "chuan bei pi pa mi"

. Now I am feeling better

.

I am looking forward to be a pretty bride

Har? Tiantian how come need to "open up" first???

My god!!! My gynae no need to "open up" one le.. My worst experience was that probe stuck inside me for 45 minutes!!!

That was done by a radiographer who cannot find my ovaries... That was ultimate and I felt sore down there for the rest of the day...

nyny,
Did your gynae give you any injections? Or supplements?
I was given injections and supplements when I was pregnant... but they din help... That time, I was very stressed up and thought negatively. You gotta relax and hope for the best

.

 

[pregnantbride2b]

I visited two gynaes... and both dun have to use fingers to "open up" before putting the probe in. The only reason for the fingers is for the gynae to locate the uterus and he will be pressing on the tummy at the same time.

 

[folic]

Hi Yasmin,

welcome to the thread.Sorry to hear about your loss. You can build up your health by taking some confinement type food, fish/meat etc cooked with ginger and sesame. Other than that, just make sure that you have a balanced diet. As for how long to wait, usually, for very early miscarriage, docs will say it is ok after your 1st menses arrived. But it wll depends on the individual. It is important to ensure that you are both ready, physically and mentally.

Take care!

folic

 

[nyny]

hi ULN
no, both of the gynaes didn't give me any supplements or jab. is it a must?

 

[yas]

Thank you very much Folic.

 

[hamasaki]

hi yasmin... welcome to this thread.. Do free free to come this thread anytime..

Take good care of yr health gal and rest well..
Sorry to hear of yr miscarriage news..

 

[nyny]

hi yasmin
take good care

did doc say when you can start trying again?

i am still praying hard for myself. hopefully everything is ok....

 

[pregnantbride2b]

Hi nyny,
I do not know if it's a must or how effective they are... For me, they did not help...

 

[tiny]

hi girls,
actually i was quite used to the v-scan cos for the previous and this pregnancy my gynae had been using it to check each time before week 12. i think it's necessary in order to establish the sac and fetal pole/heartbeat cos it's a lot more accurate and clearer very early in pregnancy. that's why he was sure i had a m/c cos it was clear that there was no heartbeat

But this was worse than the v-scan cos he had to reach all the way up to my pelvis to feel for the baby's head!!! luckily he did it quite fast and he's rather gentle so it didn't hurt. Just uncomfortable and it felt embarrassing...

Nyny, like the other girls have said, don't give up yet. Be prepared for the worst but at the same time, hope for the best. Meanwhile, take care and don't stress yourself thinking of the unknown.

Yasmin, take care. We're always sad to hear one more case, but happy that you have come here to share your thoughts cos it's no use bottling it up.

 

[teletubby]

hi gals,
i think for v-scans &amp; cervix check, the most impt thing is to relax so dat the muscles ard the vagina will not tense up... thus will be easier for the probe or finger/hand to reach the interior... jus treat the gynae as 'invisible' or he/she is a professional who has seen it all everyday... nothing to be paiseh...

dear nyny,
it's good dat u remain optimistic during dis waiting period... i'll continue to pray for u....

dear yasmin,
like wat Tiny said, it's always sad to know of a new member here... but we r glad for u dat u hv taken the first step towards recovery... dis wonderful grp of pple here has helped me during my darkest moments in life.. i'm sure u'll find the same support &amp; encouragement here... *big hugz* dun take cooling or cold stuffs from now until ur nix menses come... drink DOM/Yomeishu nightly to warm ur body... or u can drink chicken essence on alternate days... all dis will help to 'bu' ur body....

hey dear java,
i'll be thinking of u dis week...

&amp; i'm sure u'll be able to breeze thru' dis week... ask ur boy to kick u harder ya... *hugz*

hallo ULN,
happy Belated Birthday!!! it's a brand new start for u &amp; wif ur upcoming wedding... i'm sure u'll find all the good things rolling ur way...

okie lah... good nite... hubby gonna use the laptop now... sweet dreams...

 

[hamasaki]

hi tubby, me tried to relax before but find it hard to do so..

got 2 pairs of eyes staring, which i find it so uncomfortable.. now me scared to do such check-ups liao..


okie good nite to u gal.. Sweet Dreams !!