Child Adoption


Priya

Why dont u come down on 21st to meet us
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Andrea - saw the doc, he reckons it's a minor form of reflux and wind, gave some tips to keep it under control. But she came down with a running nose and cold instead
 
Hi everyone!
Today SBL Vision called with gd news of our approval. We flew down immediately to collect our HSR report. Yahoo! Called Alice immediately and she said she has 2 Chinese baby boys for our viewing next Mon-Wed.Hubby is over the moon ;)
 
hi ladies,i m new here, coming to the end of my 10th ivf cycle and if still not successful, we plan to adopt. Hope to learn more about adoption from you all.

Am i right to say for adoption process,once HSR approved, it can be very fast if there are ready babies?

For HSR, do they also check for financial standing, eg. must be debt free etc?

Can i also ask whats estimated entire cost of adoption? Will it run into tens of thousands?

Many thanks in advance!
 
HI Babiesbubbles,
It cost $25k (pao ka liao), means include lawyer and other documentation. However, you still have to pay $900 for HSR report. They will check your financial capability. Debt free - Housing loan consider Loan/Debt?? I am also preparing to adopt and read thru internet and forums.
Nice meeting you.
 
Hi Die,

Congratulation on becoming a new Mom. I am still long long way to go. About to go for 2 counselling before doing the HSR Report. First counselling on 29 dec.
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Hi baby local, one hv to go counselling before adoption? Can u tell me more abt that?

Hi baby bubbles, i must say u r so brave to go thru 10 rounds of ivf!! How u will get it this cycle
 
Hi babylocal, thanks, nice meeting you too! wow $25k? As much as 1-2 more ivfs! Financial wise i think maybe we wont make it. Only hb working fulltime and we do have some loans so that part will already minus points bah.

Hi lyn, 10 ivfs including fresh and fets. Dont think i am brave, hehe. More like no choice cos like i explained to baby local above, think we wont pass the HSR so ivf remains the only option, so sad. Either that or forget about having a child le bah.
 
@die

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm soo thrilled & happy for u
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I don't have words to say...i can really understand ur feeling that..can't tomorrow be a monday to meet ur baby...

All the best..keep us posted...the news gives me a wonderful feeling
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@babylocal

Do you mean the first interview regarding the HSR application form is on the 29th Dec? I've not heard anyone mentioning about going for counselling?

@babiesbubbles

Seriously, i agree with lyn...u r really brave...i gave up on ivf after 2 failures...no $$ & no mental strength
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U can try downloading the form..Not everyone has a clean finance picture. People do have loans to settle..so don't give up on ur hope for ivf & also check on the HSR application form regarding what is required & what u have..u might wanna call MCYS or any of its accredited agency to check with them regarding ur situation...
 
@Lyn: The counsellor would like to meet me and go for two counselling for SINGLE PARENT....Maybe for most couple, No need as they can direct go for HSR. But different for Single Parent.

@Mrs_Ha: Counselling to know me more and explain to me about adoption for Single Parent Before I really go for HSR. She said, if she thinks I am not ready for adoption, BUT i STILL want to go forward to HSR, I am always welcome. $50/counselling/1hr.

@babiesbubbles: You can discuss for installment for 25k. I know most agencies may be able to give installments.
 
Hi Die,

Wow! that's fast! Maybe you can let me know how is the viewing like after you have done urs? I intend to call Alice next week...when my mum is finished with my sister's confinement! She would like to view the baby too!
 
Hi Ladies! I' married for 7yrs n goin to be 8 soon. I just went thru an unsuccessful ivf cycle. It was a painful experience. We intend to go for adoption. We are currently collating documents to submit for the HSR report. I would love to meet u ladies to get to know each and everyone of u better and of course your valued experieces...
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I'm on course on 21 Dec. I wonder if i can leave early to meet u. May i know how long will you ladies be hanging around in Starbucks?
 
priya

there's a programme change...Since its just me & lyn, we've postponed our meeting to next year. u can come down to meet us then. I'm staying at east side of spore. where do u stay?

Don't worry. I know how it feels
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. its a good intention to adopt. Welcome to the group
 
Hi Mrs Ha,

Thanks! Do let me know the date. I would prefer in the evenings on weekdays and weekends are fine with me. I'm staying at the north east side.

Yah, not only physically, but emotionally and mentally draining ivf cycle. The HSR sounds scary!
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Priya

There's nothing to worry about HSR. its just a 25-page application form. Infact, I would say, it helps u realise what kind of person u r & how much have u understood about ur spouse & how good both of u r good as a team.

Btb., do have/make some good friends & relatives who can give some good review about u
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babiesbubble : there is reasonable instalments from alice, lotus agency as i enquire before.

die : congrats, so happy for you! i rem my 2nd hsr was approved in first week of sep this year, and immed matched with a baby boy. now 3 months old. my first boy is adopted out of thailand and will turn 3 years old next month.


mrs chou - rem me? i sat and talked to you, here i am, in the forum

andrea - bee lian here , thanks for your encouragement!!
 
Mrs Ha,

Thanks for your encouraging words. We are intending to go for adoption with Lotus Adoption Agency but we can't get hold of Alice these days. We have some queries about some of the questions in HSR.

Do you think i can meet you up sometime next 2 weeks (if you are free)?
 
Babiesbubbles,

For the hsr. u dun have to be completely debt free but u need to show that u are financially capable of providing for a child. The assessor will query on your total family expenses and income for the month in detail. U can pay the child adoption agent in 3 installments.

Low, may I ask how did u go about the hsr for the second adoption? Need to go through everything again just like the 1st hsr, document submission, interviews, referees and such? I jus collected my hsr and the process was so tedious cant imagine doing it all over again in three years time for baby #2

Priya,
I thinl Alice mostly helps couples who have completed their hsr alrdy. So any questions u can post here and I can try my best to help.

Catherine,
Ok I will update when i do get to see the babies.

Andrea, Mrs Ha,
Thanks for your encouragement all this while. Grateful for your company on my adoption journey to this day. Hugs
 
Thanks ladies, my worry was whether financial standing affect HSR assessment. Paying the agent i guess should be manageable. Hmm, got to start saving up more from now le.

Die, so exciting you are going to view babies soon!!
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@die: I think you'd better change yr threadname to alive!!
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)) I'm having goosebumps n tears as I type to you! I'm so happy for u n yr hubby! Wat a journey!!! TK u for sharing it in here n letting us be part of it. THIS IS our 'pregnancy', no doubt more than 9 mths sometimes but it is the passage for our child's journey to our arms. I think we do go through wat birthparents go through too: the anxieties, the excitements, the moments of disbelief, the doubts of whether we'll be good parents... And that there are additional emotions we experience too unique to adoptive parenting - disclosure, which is the biggest process of all. The earlier we begin, the earlier our family's foundation of love n trust will be built. TK u for letting me be part of your journey. You r in my prayers, esp the next couple of days, tt you will be guided as u meet your son. Big hugs! Sooooo exciting!
 
hi, die..yes, i started the submission (this time mainly on financial statements..if using TOUCH's qn, the first few pages, not the whole entire stack ) for hsr2 in mar this year bec mine already expired (last time is 1 year). got the home visit ( no office interview as it was the same assessor as my first case, but still need referees who will comment on your parenting with #1 ) in jul, and then 5 weeks from there, and finish in sep. so yes, its a whole cycle again.
but now, bec the hsr is valid for 2 years, but normally they encourage 1 hsr for 1 child. so very high chance need to do some "updating" which still equate to some kind of submission..and waiting ..maybe next time is not 4 months.

that is why i also felt the wait was long, and "may" get longer in the future..so i unlikely to go for #3 thinking of the long wait have to go thru again ...

but go for #2!! its certainly a joy for me, and to think that it will be the "final" in terms like after he outgrow certain baby items, i have to start giving away, makes me some kind of sad...

hope can meet u and your son!!!
 
Low,
I can certainly understand how its kinda sad to give away the baby things that have outgrown, cuz they were bought with so much love indeed. Now I fully understand the word 'pre-loved'
 
@priya

I'm sorry that I'm not free for the next couple of weeks. Can we meet sometime after 6th Jan? My relatives are coming over for holidays
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so, I'll be busy with them. You can PM me if u have anything to ask, that's quite urgent, as i'll be surfing once in couple of days atleast
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@die
I wish I could b with u today to see ur baby today...I'm so excited
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I can't write how I'm excited for u
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all the best...U r mommy die from today..There's no need for u to thank me...i dint do anything
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Hi ladies
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How r u all doing? Seasons' Greetings to yourselves & ur loved ones
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Cheers!!
 
Die
I'm happy for you! Do let me know once you have got the baby. I would like to meet the 2 of you. These few days i'm at home.
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Yes, i suspected that Alice assists only approved HSR applicants.

Mrs Ha
Its ok. You attend to your relatives first. We will meet in jan 11 as i still got to wait for the disclosure workshop. Just let me when you will be free so that i can meet u.
 
ddddddddddddddiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

what's up? no news
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too bad..u forgot all of us....

@priya

thanks. Have u attended the basic adoption seminar?
 
Mrs Ha,

I have booked the seminar date and its next month. Thats the earliest date available. Am i right to say the seminar is 'Talking with your child about adoption - A workshop by TOUCH Adoption Services'
Is this the right one?
I think die is busy with her baby! Its time to change her nick name!
 
Haha, never forget..jus busy with work n enrolment of new students for the new school term. Year end & New year is particularly busy for childcare centres.. lots of paperwork to update, new classes, time-table, staffing, uniform sale etc..jus finish our school graduation cum concert

I believe I have bought everything for baby's arrival already including ear thermometer, cot, nappies, diaper, clothes, bottles, sterilizer etc

But no news on baby yet. ;( Two evenings ago we visited an 8mths old baby boy from Joyful and played with him for abt 15 mins but there was no chemistry plus we had in mind a newborn so didnt feel right.

Me too hopes for some gd news soon..
 
Thanks mrs ha and Andrea for the advice.

Yes i have the HSR done , now waiting for some news about a baby.... any baby.... waiting waiting patiently.

Any idea ladies, is there a separate thread to discuss things like diapers, milk, bottles etc among the Adoption community? ( ie those of you who have adopted already, do u discuss this here or elsewhere in the portal)
I would like to read and contribute later when i have expreince.
 
Babydust2
Happy for you! Hope you get a baby soon! I think regarding the list you can talk here. I'm pretty new so i dont think i can advise you. Sorry abt that.
 
Hi everyone,

We supposed to view a new-born on Christmas eve. Before we set-off, we received the call from the adoption agency that a couple before us wanted to adopt the baby. We were very disappointed
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The agency re-assured us that they will call us once there is a baby available for adoption. Therefore, I would like to know what the approximate lead-time to find a child of your own?
 
Hi babydust2, feel free to ask any questions about baby items. If there isn't enough information, you can also follow other threads on these baby items. Let me know if you need the baby list.

Die, Catherine, you both are becoming a mother. Don't be too anxious, be patient and wait for YOUR baby, this is your expectant time and try to enjoy it. Whatever religion you believe in, ask God to match you with your child. Don't worry about other people being ahead of you. Because your baby will wait for you.
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Catherine,

You do not accept PM. Can I check which is the agency u mentioned? U can pm me if confidential.

Babydust,,
Just like u, i am waiting, waiting albeit impatiently ;)

iwantitvmuch,
U are rite. There is a baby destined for each one of us. So if something didnt fall through then it was not meant to be and the rite one will come in its own time. Thanks for your reminder. It makes me feel better somehow. ;)

Tomorrow I have taken urgent leave from work and will be going to JB to view a baby. Excited..
 
Hi everyone,
Besides Lotus agency, what the other reliable adoption agency which we can go to?

Hi Die,
Already PM u. Take care n hope to hear the good news from u soon!

Hi Iwantitvmuch,
Thks for ur encouragement. Will patiently for the young one
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Die, All the best!

Die and catherine, you both can go and buy some books on handling of new born. Maybe shop for materials to do life book. Alot to do before baby arrives cos when baby arrived, no time to do anything.

something very random but I've learnt that alot of people prepare their formula milk wrongly.
remember to read the directions when making milk. alot of people mix the milk powder with HOT water and then add the room temp water. that's wrong as it will kill all the live cultures.
The RIGHT way is to mix hot and room temp water to the amount required(eg. 4 oz), THEN Add the milk powder. DON"T shake the bottle but use a spoon to stir.
All these are stated on the tin. That's why for baby products, be it play things or food, remember to read the labels and instructions. This is a good habit and I always teach my domestic helper to do that too.
 
Tomorrow will be my first counseling for baby adoption. Can't wait to be interviewed for the eligibility.  but still very long long way to HSR. Haizzz
 
Die and Catherine
All the best for the two of you

iwantitvmuch
Its an useful info for mummies and yet to be mummies to take note. Thank u!

Baby Local
I'm preparing my documents still not there yet. Mine going to be longer.
 
Die and Catherine,
I know this is a hard time right now and I can still recall when I was waiting for my baby. It was really nerve wrecking and I remembered that I kept checking my phone for any call. I also could not stop calling the agency for updates.

But as iwantitvmuch reminded you, your baby is the one that is choosing you! And everything will work out fine.

Waiting to read good news from you and u can PM me if want to ask me anything.

As for the rest of the ladies, continue to persevere! Your baby is waiting for you
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Hi Everyone,

We have fallen in love with our baby boy. Will be arranging his passport and bringing out to Singapore Gleneagles for medical check tmr. We have decided to bring him home after the check up cuz cant bear the thot of him on the long journey back to Malaysia again to wait for the result.

For days I have agonized over how to identify the right baby for us. Well, my advice to others in the same position now is, that when u see the one, u will jus know..so dun need to dwell on it. It's jus about falling in love with someone, jus cant explain why and how.

Hope that everything is smooth from here..

Can I check with experienced mummies
- is it really necessary to do the scans for baby?
or will a BT suffice?
-At which point did u announce bb's arrival to the rest of the world?
- Anyone also brought home bb before the BT result? Hope that im doing the right thing here..jus cant resist bringing him home cuz I miss him already..
 

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