HI bb,
*hugs* I think all of us here have been thru' the disappointment of failed IUIs/failed natural cycle.the success rate of IUI (not sure abt SO-IUI) is only 25%.so logically thinking,majority of ppl fail.So pls don't beat urself up over it.I know wat u mean when u say u're disappointed.I was like that for the 9 mths i was trying.at the slightest sign of spotting,my heart sinks,and my world collasps.it's a mind game,bb.during my AF,i'll be moody the whole wk.but i'll still force myself to do routine things.in fact,i'm juz like a robot.the emotions are not there.then after the AF is over,when O is approaching,i get very hopeful again,coz i know i have another shot at it.it's really tough,u have to be mentally strong.try gal,okie.bb dear,u know u're very lucky to have the support of ur hubby.it's good that a couple goes thru' this up and down together.it bonds u as a couple,that's wat i feel.for me,my hubby only felt disappointment when i had my stillbirth and m/c.more so for the m/c,coz we tried so long,and had a history of unsuccessful preg.i could see tears in his eyes.but as for ttc,i'm still all alone in this.nothing has changed since we started trying.my hubby doesn't even get disappointed.so i go thru' these emotions by myself.have u tried talking to ur hubby,as least if u wanna cry,u can cry with him.at least u can share ur sorrows/disappointment with him.i go thru' all this myself,u know? so look on the bright side of things,u have someone to hold ur hands thru' this journey.
Crafty_yard & bb,
where are both of u doing ur IVF? NUH or KKH? do u mean there's a Q.as in,cannot do it straightaway? wat is the reason for the Q? if so,maybe i need to start Q-ing up.so i need to go back to NUH to c prof wong.
Just Faith,
who are u having SO IUI under? how do u feel abt ur hubby's reaction? i'm sure u urself think it's all worth it,right? so hang in there,lady.u're a brave girl.when i had my IUI (no SO),i was so afraid of jabbing myself that i went to a friend's house (she's a doc) and told her to jab me.I wished my hubby could do it,coz poking us is really seeing us go thru' stuff.but it seems like ur hubby is very supportive,so i'm happy for u.u know,to think i jab ppl everyday,but to jab myself,i'm not sure if i have the courage.it's not the pain i'm afraid of,i don't even know which part i'm afraid of.haha.
Ladies dearest,
I'm so thankful i have all of u here.i need ur help to get me thru' this tough period again.i'm going to have my IUD removed on tues (hopefully),then it's time to BD again.the 6 or 7 wks after the m/c was such a joyful time.coz i know since i've been bleeding,cannot BD.so i don't have to scheme,i don't have to plan,i don't have to cajole.but after tues,the fact that i know i have a shot again,i will try.it's juz the mind playing tricks,isn't it? i seem to be starting to get stressed out again.these past wks,i've been able to take a deep breath when i have tots of ttc,and i can refocus.i didn't even mention to my hubby abt ttc,coz i could shaft it out of my mind temporarily.But i crumbled today.
that's the reason y i'm up so late writing this.don't know y,hubby is in a strange mood again.refused physical contact.i started testing the waters early tis wk,and i was rejected time and time again.i'm sounding so desperate,right? but i'm sure those who are trying knows wat i mean.it's that frustration that hubby is not making use of the chance.to be honest,BD should be fun.i still enjoy it,but i cannot get hubby to do it like last time,when it was quite frequent.
Does anyone have this problem? does anyone know how to increase libido? even if it's not for ttc,i would still like to BD often.my hubby is superb,isn't he? 6 or 7 wks of no BD,still did not ask for BD.i cried so much out of frustration juz now.i tot i could cry myself to bed,but i still couldn't sleep.i really don't know wat to do.i'm asking god to help me,seriously.a girl has her needs to,agree?
sometimes i think IVF is really a good option,coz no need to BD.but thinking of how hubby is treating me now,do i want to put myself thru' IVF? if the marriage seems to be breaking down,is it better not to have kids? i'm still pondering.but i would really love kids of my own.juz listening to those girls in the IVF thread,i felt fear for the 1st time.i always tot i'm a tough girl.but knowing all the nitty gritty of IVF,i really think it's a very tough procedure on the woman.not to mention,one has to mentally prepare herself for failure after spending so much money.i think it's the failure that scares me more.the stakes are so high.I juz wish someone will shake my hubby up and wake him up or give him a hard knock on the head or something like that.i really appreciated dr chris chong's effort.though he did not do very much for me,i always felt like he held my mind and spirit together.he will sternly tell my hubby i'm going thru' a lot,and he needs to put in his effort too.not so directly like how i'm writing it,but nicely and with the words going into my hubby's head for processing.
Ladies,i have a very mean idea.i'm going to c LC cheng coz hubby insisted on seeing him.i find it so silly coz given our history,he will prob say can get preg naturally,so go try ourselves.hubby is sometimes to ignorant.juz coz 2 of his collegues' wives got preg with LC cheng,he wants me to go c LC cheng.waste of $$,but i'm going so he will shut up.to me,there's no point.i've tried everything.i O properly,hubby's swimmers are the problem,but we still got preg twice naturally.there's nothing LC cheng can do for us.but since hubby already has such faith and trust in LC cheng,i may ring LC cheng way b4hand and tell him to emphasize to my hubby that to have a baby,he needs to BD with me! so scheming,right? but how else will hubby wake up? sigh...i'm so glad i can vent my frustration here.i feel much better already.a whole load taken off my mind and shoulders.