(2011/10) Oct 2011

Roxanne,



same. i got cramps and frankly i can't differentiate between tummy pain or cramps. so the other night i panic. i worry early labour. sigh. i have to be put on antibiotics when i give birth. problem with mine is i am allergic so might have to sign the indemnity form.

strep B will also have alot of discharge so its like yeast infection but if its not itchy then my doc say most likely caused by strep b and not yeast infection. i quite sian of changine liners already. i bought and used up so many packs of pads and liners its even worse than having period when not pregnant. haiz....



my boss ask me come back in dec to work or work half day every day 1 month after i give birth.

i ask him how to when i need to breast feed almost every 2 hours. very upset with him.



happymomo,ben ben,

kimchi ramen is my recent crave. i just have to eat it. but its not good, loads of salt. that is why my feet swollen badly. i drink alot of water also no use and yes, i also worry GD. i ate durian, loads of chocolate and sweets and loads of gong tea and bubble milk tea. its like after resisting the temptation for months due to cough and asthma, the flood gate opens! i am now super worried cos next week see doc. i worry GD etc. haiz. but i tell u, i crave for the kimchi ramen badly. i tried not to eat, i control and control until lie in bed also think and finally i had no choice but to wake up and cook to eat at 1am + then after that i slept happily. my hubby was shocked but no choice leh, i really want very much to eat it. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif]



aiyah, i forgot about the cheong choon store. i just went there to buy a play pen mattress. the second hand playpen i got didn't come with mattress and gosh kiddly palace was selling it for $125, some branded babysafe brand. the playpen i got is small size and the lady said only babysafe got such small mattress. in the end i went to cheong choon at chinatown per mummies advice last time and i only got it for $30! but i forgot about the beansprout pillow. nevermind, when i take over the baby cot i will have to buy mattress, i will ask my hubby go there to buy too. thank you for the reminder! [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]

 


pofy,

your boss so bad...



me also trying to look for a job after i come back from ML.

V super duper sian liao.

 
haiz.



my boss can't get a replacement with his offer of lousy pay in the current market. so he wants me to continue. no need to pay for extra person. he say if i come back one day, he will extend the leave for 1 day etc.

but I think its tough. nobody help me look after baby, how to come back.

i take 1.5 hrs to get to work, by the time i reach work, i need to breastfeed already right if i assume baby drink every 2 hrs.

i also don't know if this is his way of getting rid of me. very confused now and yes, very sian. sigh.

 
Pofy, may i ask what is ur role in the current job, why is there a difficulty in getting a temp replacement?



Take ur bonus before u leave, the money will be useful for the baby.

 
Pofy

You can propose another arrangement with your boss? Why not propose to come back 3 days a week after 2 or 3 months? I'm sure he will understand your dilemma. If you are not able to accede to his request, you should counter propose something that you are comfortable with.



mummycoccyx

You should consider taking over Tabbyz's CL. I just paid the deposit to agent in the morning when Tabbyz posted that her cl was available ...... I went with PEM. GPLS claims they are fully booked for Oct.

 
sigh.



roxanne,

i don't want to think so far. i just want to pass the coming 2 months peacefully. i just want to carry baby to full term. baby out i take care and then see how. but i tell you hor, during maternity leave cannot go for interview. i have a friend went for interview during maternity leave, the HR of the company told her off and of course she didn't get the job. she said not ethical. sigh.



happymomo,

i admin cum clerk cum accounts assistant. one man show. cheap cheap to my boss i think. these days you ask the younger generation to draw my kind of salary with no career growth and do so many things, where got young mei mei want to do? only old auntie like me will stay on. hahaha. no market value already. my boss also take into account this part to exploit. that is why i tot maybe i should be ntuc or shop and save cashier. i see many aunties do it. ok also. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]

 
Roxanne (whiteloverz)



Think our boss has to approve us to take continuous 16 weeks. Only the first 8 weeks is compulsory.



Pofy: Lucky we still have 8 weeks compulosry, if not I think ur boss will ask u to come back everyday for half day after birth. Terrible boss!

 
pofy, why maternity cannot go for interview? it is our choice mah... that hr also very funny de...



ya happymomo, subject to approval one... but everyday go back half day or few hours, really very disruptive to work and personal life..

 
aiyo..pofy, u very old meh? say until u so aunty like that. Come on, with ur multi-task experience and hard working attitude, tell ur boss, u can easily get a better paid job elsewhere.. let him know you have your market value too..cannot let him "eat" you up!..

YOU MUST PROTECT YOURSELF....



All the best, my dear...;-)

 
hahaha.



royal i not young already. soon i will hit the big 4! nevermind the age. thank ful for the gift. every baby is a gift to us. we must treasure. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]

hardworking these days no use one. i was told must work smart. something i don't know how to do. i only work like a cow. hahaha. if really cannot then nevermind, i will quit after the 2 months and forget about the 2 extra months. then i will try look for a job. no point stress over this. he is a funny man, from May i tell him i pregnant but he no action. Now august then he come up with funny ideas. and best of all he is married with 3 kids. i thought he will know we need to breastfeed unless his wife did not? i wonder.... kekeke.



bubblygeekyping and roxanne,



i don't know leh. but that HR say she is not suppose to do so because technically she is suppose to be on leave and she is still employed. but the last statement given to my friend was : it is not ethical.



now i got another concern. throughout this pregnancy, my boobs did not grow at all. i still use old bra. no increase in cup size eventho my tummy very very big. i worry no milk. any link between boobs size and milk supply?

 
Pofy, cashier not easy, stand whole day. Think account assistant, u can easily change a job leh. Of cos, u give yourself sometimes after ML to look for a job, say another 3 months, by then we already deliever, I think we are better able to cope with nasty people.

 
Pofy, u not the oldest, I think I m oldest, hit the big 4 this year in Oct...;-)



my boobs grow abit in size..am still wearing old bra too..with extension. frds told me doesn't means big boobs will hv more milk..though I have that "size" Her advice is to cook papaya soup to drink (must go get receipe), massage boobs and if still dont work, she would recommend me to take some pills/herbs during confinement which I am clueless what it is. Will find out for you should u need. You can also surf net to find out how to produce more BM. :)

 
Hi Pofy,



Boob size got nothing to do with milk supply. I've got a friend with AA cup and she can breastfeed her child for 18 months. But in order to breastfeed, you need to relax your mind, think nothing but about your baby and feed or pump out at a constant interval and eat more fish. The supply will drop when your mind starts working or you skip a feed or pump interval.



Its too early to talk about breastfeeding now as it will be hard to imagine how breastfeeding feels like for first time mummies. I will share more tips and give you some links on the recipes that will help lactation when the time comes.



Meanwhile, dun stress up about work. Rest more and eat well for the final trimester. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]

 
Read that no link between breast size n milk supply. All mothers surely will hv milk. They say just latch n pump n milk will come for sure.



Think u can just tell ur boss fly kite once ML is up. Dun feel bad rejecting him. Dun u notice now all mummies see the true light of their workplace after preg? N majority hv been treated badly becoz of preg n want to find new job. Myself included so prepare resume n send out during ML. There's nothing unethical abt it. Those not on ML also hunt new jobs wat. There is no wrong at all. It takes quite long for jobs to get back so no harm submitting anyway.

 
I am an employer. If someone currently on maternity leave applies to my company for a position, it is unlikely that I will hire her. I will take it that she does not have integrity and does not take her responsibilities seriously. If I hire this person, I can be pretty sure that she will repeat the same at my organisation.



At least work with the company for a few more months before resigning, or let your intention be known early and be flexible so that if your employer is not able to fill your position, you can still be around to help out or handover. If you must go for interview, do not be so silly as to tell the HR that you are currently on maternity leave. This will leave a very poor impression on you.



As an employer, its tough as it is to have to depend on temp (if I can even get a temp) or no help for at least 16 weeks. Remember that your employer is holding your position for you. Right after returning to work, the employee drops the bomb and it will take an additional 1-3 months to find a suitable candidate to fill her position. Above that, the new staff coming in will take 2 months to learn and adjust to the new company. That is a total of almost 7-9 month of down time.



No offence to anyone here, but it really is tough to hire the right candidate, even for 5 day week 9-5 office work. In retail its even worse, more than 90% of applicants are foreigners, and most of the remaining Singaporeans are not suitable. They even come for interview with their boyfriends and are dressed in jeans, or shorts and slippers!

 
Pofy,

this baby is your #1 or #2?



my boobs also didnt grow much. I am also still wearing old bras with extension.

For my #1, my breast milk a lot.. but due to some circumstances, i stop bf-ing after 1 month.

And i am a small cup to start with.. so no linkage of big cup size means will have a lot of milk...haha

 
pofy

i'll rather take e 4mth ML dun let them 'eat' u.. after tat then svc ur notice period can lve alr.. else u can start looking for job during e last mth of ML.. i also heard size doesnt have an effect on e supply..

 
btw, pofy,

I think u shld finished up your 4 mth ML..it's ur entitlement.

Just reject all your boss request about coming back to work half day etc. He is pushing his luck on you. after then 4th mth, come back work 2 weeks and tender your resignation. give him full notice, tell him either he increase your pay or you will resign.

 
hahaha,



all mummies. thank you very much for all the encouragement and the rally for the job!

i guess both employer and employee got a role to play. I see tamms email i also understand. Shall plan and discuss with hubby and find a solution that most fit us. baby still comes first.



happymomo,

last time i work as sales at beauty counter, not allowed to sit also. whole day stand. so quite used to it. maybe good practice. hahaha



benben,

look forward to the tips sharing on increasing milk supply. just hope it does not require herbs as i can't take chinese herbs due to asthma,not even bird nest (save money) as bird nest triggers me into a fit of heaving!



kiki,gilera,royal,

good to know boobs size not related. i am as flat as the airport runway. hahaha



everyone, have a good dinner and a good sleep!

baby dust to all mummies!

 
When u are on ML u are on paid leave. When u are on medical leave u are on paid leave. When u are on urgent leave u are on paid leave. When u are on hospital, childcare, personal, leave in lieu, half day leave u are on paid leave.



Anytime during ur employment there is no clause that you may not LOOK for another job. Our paid leaves are our entitlement. It is our right and where are ethics shown to us when we are loaded with work with discrimination just because we are preggy?



We dun have to tolerate and be afraid of resigning just because of obligation. So long as we have completed our work, abide by whatever notice rules there is no wrong to seek greener pastures. 4 months paid maternity leave is granted by law. Our obligation is to be good mothers not be blindly loyal workers to unappreciative bosses.



It's a 2 way lane. Loyalty n trust has to be earned, not bought.

 
hihi long time never post anything, juz a silence reader [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]

Profy: dont worry abt ur job, my boss not going to find a replacement for me too . . . .

and nobody can replace my job, faint, cos hard to find temp for my post too

so i only taking 2 mth and go bk to work . . . .

next yr worst i got too many leave to clear . . . and i dun noe he can take it or not hahaha

 
what tamms said is true, if really got intention to leave, maybe can tell ur employer before maternity leave cos no matter what, they have intention to keep the position for u for 4 months during absence...



what gilera said is also true... not to be blindly loyal to unappreciative bosses... No one is indispensable in a workplace, one day when u have no value to the organisation, they will just kick u off... *this is what i have learnt from my previous workplace --> there is no compassion...* so, just complete ur work, that's it...



ethical or non ethical, it is very subjective.. because when employer dont want us, they also only give us 1 month notice and that's it... sorry, though i was in HR but i think end of the day, it boils down to what kind of organisation and boss we are working for... relationship with the boss is really impt & i believe we stay or leave because of the boss! i have seen ppl working in the org for >20 yrs in high position got laid off just because the ceo dont like him... each for his own bah..

 
My gf just got dismissed immediately at 7 months preggy.

Assigned her impossible deadline in her condition n can get her out for "under performance". So they v smelly wat pay one month instead of 4. Shameful. How's that for ethics to a preggy? Apparently they always pull this stunt when getting rid of ppl.



The position is always there for whomever fit to fill. They won't reserve just for u. There will b replacement or delegation. The e world doesn't stand still for 4 months u r on ML. So y be debted to be stuck in a rut just becoz paisay to leave.



No such thing cannot find staff. U offer high enough who wouldn't wanna do.

 
good morning mummies, TGIF! and the long weekend is here if you are on leave on Monday! Hooray!



pofy, your boss is obviously squeezing you dry... also there are plenty of accounts/admin/clerk positions out there! i know because i've been looking for a temp replacement for my ML since the very beginning of this preg and only managed to secure 1 early last month. i'd suggest you to take your 16 weeks maternity leave straight. take good care of yourself too. keeping you in prayers.



gilera, what got terminated at 7 months? i think your gf can claim her maternity leave pay from MOM because by right, the employer isn't allowed to fire an employee without valid reasons if she's more than 3 months pregnant.

 
Hi. I was also thinking of quiting my job and was looking around until my Pregnancy put an end to that. Luckily my dept culture is pro family and understanding so I have no problems so far. I am in HR so they must set good example mah [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]) To be fair to them, I plan to at least work till middle of next year before exploring my job options again.



Hi gilera, saw your post on the " next day deliver" gynae visit. It happened to me for my first pregnancy! When for my 38weeks routine checkup an gynae just dais weight didn't go up for last 2 months so recommended to take out baby asap. Just like that, I was told to induce the next day! Scrambled to call my office and my colleagues to settle work, bring home laptop etc. But the adrenaline helped so it went ok. Just that induce usually takes a long time since I think the body wasn't prepared. I induced the next morning 9am but only gave birth the next day at 5am. Long wait!

 
luv (luvagape)

ya there is a law for that but her company can justify that she did not perform to their crazy expectation/ newly assigned project. she is now 7-8 months, due in Sep. ongoing appeal with MP so this case will drag very long.



thats why for all mommies - utilize 4 months ML before your boss pull stunt or change thier minds when u take lesser than 4 months.



leeoh (leeoh)

inducing takes such a long time... then why do they decide to induce. how to speed up? induce means to break waterbag? pls share ur detail story and recovery! hehehehhe... thanks !!! i love to hear then freak out and wonder if my turn will be similar and how will i survive...

 
Hi mommies, I'm also taking 4 mths straight.

Initially wanted to take 3.5 mths then remaining 0.5 mth to take as and when but then my HR did a calculation and advised that if 4 mths straight i'm entitled to 112 days leave. But if 3.5 + 2 weeks, i'm only entitled 108 days.

So mommies..if possible just take 4 mths. Don't let your company "eat" your leave.

 
ya..yes..they are nice ppl. My boss also prefer me to take 4 mths so she can employ temp staff for a longer period.



btw mommies, do you buy bb pampers now? what brand do you buy?

 
I didnt really count if my HR did the calculation correct.



My ML commence 27 Oct 2011 and ends 15 Feb 2012, total 112 days.



Let me check with my HR.



BTW gilera, do you know what are the holidays? I don't have a calender at home now.

 
u can check mom.gov.sg site for public holidays



diapers, i bought huggies, NTUC got offer as well as taka BB fair - think i over stocked...

 
any mommies gonna accomplish major project over long weekend?



i really wanna set up cot and arrange BB room



wanted to do b.wax during lunch just now. but this new Strip outlet at vivo so rude. ergh! angry!

 
gilera, yup just done that and written an email to my HR. Waiting for them to reply.



Did you buy NB size?



For bb room, i'm still waiting for my in-laws to clear up the room. I'm staying with them so all are their things.



I heard from my fren that you get shaved when you deliver so does this mean it's better to get waxed first? I'm really scared of the pain and shy too.

 
Winny (winny)





yes i bought 4x24pcs NB sixe



heard that after 1-2 week out grow le. and depends BB size at birth



it will be cleaner to wax first - neater then follicles all pull out, but also scared pain never wax since wedding 2010 LOL

 
mummies,



for waxing if it your first time, have to be mindful. Other than the pain threshold, have to take into acccount if your skin is sensitive to the stuff they applied to do the waxing.

I heard of incidents caused itch and makes matter worse. just sharing some thoughts.

I wish to wax too but no courage. my tolerance for pain is very low, now also worry about labour pains. sigh.

 
wat have ur gynaes instructed u to do?



if water break, increase frequet contraction snad bloody show call gynae / clinic or hospital or head straight to hospital and check in?



will we be in some other room tbefore delivery room as heard once check in got charges....



do u all have direct gynae mobile number - are we suppose to have?

 
waxing pain is just 2 seconds when they pull . good therapists will press on area after they pull off wax. there is numbing cream also. the pain wont shout out kind. but the anxiousness makes me always hold my breath....

 
re: ML

must check with HR carefully .. the 1st 8 weeks are compulsory, which means 8 * 7 days (inclusive of weekends and PH) .. no choice; have to forfeit 3 days PH during our ML .. the remaining 8 weeks, 8 * 5 days (for my company as mine is 5-day work) and this does not includes PH ..



re: waxing

do not dare to go for it now as some mummies went into labor due to the pain .. going to either trim/shave ..



re: delivery

different hospital has different practices; same goes for the different class .. some are delivered by midwives; some are delivered by on-call team .. me under KKH; they have this premiere maternity package whereby baby will be delivered by doctor of choice with a specialized team .. need to sign up beforehand, though ..

 
hi tamms, i would love to opt for normal. My fren is normal delivery and she got shaved leh.

I think i'll go ask around again.

 
happymomo: yup, everything will be charged as private rate .. for private, there are 2 maternity packages in KKH - classic & premiere .. classic: baby delivered by team on duty .. premiere: baby delivered by chosen doctor ..

 
Fantastar- I also with kkh but dunno under what package. But my gynae will deliver for me. The #1 birth v fast so neither shaven nor trimmed.. Very happy.

 


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