Angelina
I also very reluctant to send my son to cc initially too. But for your situation, now the crux is that YOU must be the pillar of support for your 2 children, especially Josh, if u love him so much. In order for you to be the pillar, u must be their sun. If no sun, their days will be dark.
In order to be their sun, u must be rested well, stay positive n be in charge n on the ball. If minding 2 kids at such close age gap does not makes u the above, then you have to really send josh to cc, so that u can grow to be their sun.....lemme explain ..
As we all have said, Josh learns things at cc n he can be more independent...u can then spend the time that you usualy spend teaching him onto more quality stuff...eg doing something u both enjoy. He gets more happy, n u see him happier u'll get happier too. Then family dynamics will get better if you are more happy n all. It's always related lor. If u want to hold onto him, he will never grow to his fullest potential.
Sometimes we parents néed to let go abit so that our child can walk, fall, pick himself up, n learn. Children are like kites, you need to pull n release the string to see them soar higher n higher in the sky. Letting the kite go off abit does not mean we will lose our kite; infact they can soar higher if we release the strings. That's our job, n that's how we can nurture them
I hope you see some point in my long winded post n pls shout out if you need help [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]