(2009/05) May 2009 MTBs

Porky - Cause she say she have 3 boy so hope i can have a gal. Same lor i hide inside the room but they always go in and out of the room as and when they like.

Cola - Both me and my hubby 22years old cause he just finish NS not long only dun have CPF. Then without CPF cant apply flat lor.. Meaning i got to suffer in there.. Sian..
My MIL say she not going to look after the kid for me.. She ask me to stay at home and take care of kid myself dun go and work but she keep asking money from us.. how to depend on my hubby alone le..
 


yuki - no choice lor, juz hv to bear with it since hv to stay with in laws, i argue with mil so many times le but i see that she adores my gal so much so I try to be tolerant lor..

porky - doesn't matter boy or gal la, healthy most impt, It's natural that they yearn for a gal since so many sons at home, just ignore them la. If they nag again, tell them it's your hubby's chromosome that decides the sex of your baby not your egg!!
 
<font face="Comic Sans MS,Tahoma"> Porky, Yuki,
When I had my #1 (boy), mil oso kinda disappointed. cos she had 2 boys and relative side mostly boys as well... bt i oso dun care. Anyway she's not the one supporting my child. And now #2 (boy) she's like "huh. boy again" Anyway gd to hv boys. If not she'll kip 'harrassing' my bb is she's girl. hahaa..

Yuki,
U're 1 yr younger then me and cola. heheee</font>.
 
Haiz i think this place is the only place i can say out all my anger.. I cant even argue with my MIL if she is in the wrong cause my hubby will get angry with me instead. He say they old liao is our parent must respect them, my hubby is those very xiao shun to parent type.

Worst is when i decide to have my bb born in TMC they disagree abt it. Keep wanting me to go KKH instead.. So angry lor its my own kid le how can they force me? Plus i nv prepare to have kid at the first place its accident lor.. Haiz.. Then now not working worst at home see their face ><
 
yes, this is also the only place i can say out all my sorrow..even hubby also cant understand how we feel. tell him also waste time only. my hubby also the xiao shun type. he dont like if i talk too loud to my MIL. but she anyhow go inside my bedroom..how to tolerate..got once, i really cant tahan. tell my MIL in her face that "pls dont go inside my room when i am working ok. else i will locked it" she just keep quiet. then at night tell my hubby. end up we quarrel...

xue, my mil also has 2 sons. but she still prefer boy.

when i got m/c early this year. thats the worst time i spent in my life. 2 weeks at home facing her. feel like commit suicide somemore..cos she blame me a lot..and talk on the phone with other relatives that i lost my precious bb. my hubby is at work..he doesnt know anything at all..now i am very careful this time...hope i can carry till full term. wish me luck !
 
Porky u work from home ah? Did you tell ur hubby abt what she say to the relative? M/C le still like this i think for me i will get into depression or really jump down lor.. So hard on u.. I wander y all MIL is like this.. Heng my mother leave my room empty instead things happen i can go back.. My mum hate my mil as well..
U can carry throught till full term de.. believe in urself.. the bb want u to be his / her mummy too..
 
no i dont work from home..i told my hubby abt that my mil talk to the relatives behind my back..but my hubby just say ignored her loh..cos he say my mil also sad that i lost the bb thats why she wan to vent to the relatives...so many times i open the window inside my bedroom, stand on a stool but still got no courage to jump down..cos in my mind always think of my parents and my hubby...my mum house dont have room for me le..3 room flat only..thanks. i hope my bb will know that i love him/her so much. pls be strong for mummy this time
 
Yuki,
Both u and hubby are super young!

Porky,
Need to just "ren" k.. like what flommy said, so long as they adore our kids, jus close one eye..

So far my in laws are quite okay, no conflict at all... tho maybe we have different ways of doing things, different characters, different opinions, but I have never argued at all with them.. if i am unhappy, then just complain to hubby, i know he cant do anything, but having someone to listen to my complaints makes me feel better.. It's like that.. but anyway I am grateful that they love my girl so much...

Re: gender
Hm.. i personally think that just ignore them, anyway we cant choose our baby's gender, so long as the baby is healthy and happy, should be fine. My in laws only have 2 sons, but they never say anything whether our babies are boys or girls, they said its the same, most important is health..
Guess I am luckier in this way haha..
 
Hi Porky,
Finally my broadband is working... Yipeeee!
Sorry to hear that you r still hving problems with your MIL, guess all of us here as DILs will hv one or another issue with them... Did you try to get your hubby to speak to her??
Like me MIL, when my hubby's bro's wife was pregnant with a girl, she kept telling me things that they don't mind as long as bb is healthy which I agree but when my FIL knew that mine is a boy, he was smiling the whole day but my MIL did make some uncalled for remarks to me hinting that I'm not the only one that has a boy (Her daughter has given her a grandson as well but there's still a difference- Surname). A few days after they knew I'm hving a boy, she cooked bird nest for me and instead of once a week tonic soup, now it's increase to twice a week. I'm not complaining but can't stand how hypocrite she can be.
My story abt her is never ending.... sigh... will u be going for the gathering?? Hope to see you there!

Hi Flommy,
How are you feeling?? Did your gynae tell you when will u know the results??
 
mikojade, now have broadband ah ? so good ! mine also just sign up last week. hehe. yes..still having problems with mil..u know also right ? told my hubby many times le..but he cant do anything. cos his mum has no place to go. if fil is around that will be so good. too bad they divorce 4yrs ago...else they can move out and stay together happily..and we will be happy too. my story abt my mil also never ending..can read into a book leh..haha. yes, i hope to see u in the gathering too ! and hope that our 1st gathering will be a success !
 
Hi Ladies
Haven't been visiting this thread cos busy with my dd1 who's going P1 next year. Went to orientation, buy books, uniforms etc. Headache.

Btw, may I know if you mummies can feel any movements? Until now (15 wks) I can't feel anything. So worrying lor. Next week seeing gynae.
 
rc_cola, indeed u have very good and understanding in laws. i envy u really. i believe my mil will adore her grandchildren thats for sure. cos is their 内孙 mah. if i dont stay with her, i think our relationship can be so much better. i am not those type of girls tat like to complain or show face one. whatever my mil say i never disagree with her. anyway she is my hubby's mum. i must respect her. only when i already told her dont go inside my room, but she still wan to go in...haiz...and my m/c issue..really dunno how to say..can cry when i am typing this to u...
 
Hi Ladies,

dkaren here. Hasnt been well since sunday caught flu, cough and running nose from my colleague and my parents.

Now currently resting at home.
Counting down to my 16weeks.
Just yesterday, i felt my baby turn.
I felt scary yet amazing that my baby had turned.

Have you all started buying stuff for ur baby for those 1st timer mummy? Any tips for me what can i start to source or look around?

if there is any group shopping outing for baby's stuff, please include me. i''m gladly to join u all for that.
 
Anxylyn, dont scare me leh...i am also 15 weeks leh..i dont feel any bb movement at all...is my bb still alive inside ??? my next gynae appt is 20th dec...super long wait !
 
Porky &amp; Yuki - we can form a unhappy daughter in law club :p When i just had my #1, we have so many differences in taking care of my gal &amp; she fed my gal until she vomit so I cannot "ren" my mil ley, I will shout at her ley. I told my hubby that it's very sinful to stay with my mil, make me become so disrespectful, it's totally different at my own home. My parents will tell me I will burn in hell for shouting at them lor!! So i tink i will burn in hell...

Miko - My gynae says 2-3 weeks then get result, this is so agonising ley..
 
Anyxlyn / Porky - I only feel my bb movement at 20 weeks when I had my #1, so don't worry la, my #2 more experience liao so i feel the movement sooner - around 18 weeks.
 
Flommy, haha. ya we must form a club liao. and share all our uphappiness together. at least we wont get depression at later stage...my mum also tell me dont be disrespectful to my mil..she say just ren loh..anyway we choose our own hubby mah..who to blame ? blame ourself only loh...

dont worry, we will pray for u. ur bb will be strong for u too.

hey, i really worried leh..how ah ? i still never feel any bb movement or even any turn or wat leh...nothing at all..is it ok or not...
 
hi dkaren, u must rest ok. u now how many week ? can feel bb turn ah ? how is it like ?

if really got shopping for bb stuff outing, pls include me too. cos hubby is always so busy to shop for bb stuff with me. so i think better join u girls loh.
 
wow so many of u so young hor..

i really peifu u all who can tahan staying with your in-laws. i heng never stay with my in-laws or i'll go crazy de.. my MIL has cleanliness obsession, everyday clean in and out, i can hardly go to her house (which is fine with me) cos after we leave, she'll clean the whole day. we hardly talk or meet, not say go shopping. but as my hubby is the only son (my hubby got a sister), she dotes on my hubby a lot and always call him to talk to him on the phone. so far, after knowing about my pregnancy, she never said anything to me (only tell my hubby what i cannot eat) and never cook any tonics for me whatsoever. she will only ask my hubby to go home for birds nest and green bean soup but nothing for me de. we go out for dinner (once in a blue blue moon) she also never talk to me, only keep talking to my hubby. i'm so glad we're not staying with her (we're staying with MY wonderful parents!) or else i sure depression de. My SIL has depression cos of my MIL and has eating disorders and sometimes cut herself. poor gal..

Re: gender
my hubby wants a boy leh but so far, looks like a girl. he still hoping for it to change to a boy. but i think gals are better for him. after knowing that BB is a girl, he seems to be more caring, before that he a bit bochup. i hope a BB gal will change him for the better!

Anxylyn: So long never see u here liao! must be very busy getting ready for P1! i can only feel bits of flutterings so far, dunno if i imagined it or not also..

Re: Gathering
We now have 10 people who can make it on 10 Dec (Wed) or 11 Dec (Thu)! Will wait till end of today for more people to respond! Link to indicate your preferred date is here: http://www.doodle.com/participation.html?pollId=464iwxs7hiki4bdb
 
hi anxiouspreggy,

what is the triple test?
like the other mommy said, think positive. how you mood goes will affect the baby too, so stay calm and happy.

hope everything will turn out fine. take care!
 
<font face="Comic Sans MS,Tahoma"> BB movements:
I feel the little one moving i think 1-2mth ago? So nw a day will receive at least 10 kicks from him. =) If hungry lagi worse.. keep kicking and moving non-stop. hehee..
Those who din feel any movement yet dun worry so much... Sure ur bb is in there moving actively just tt you din notice...

In laws:
me too dun agree to the ways mil handle my son. She's rough and only thinks for herself. If really she looks after my son, i think she will starve my son lor or even feed him those unhealthy snacks.. Unlike own mum, at least my mum will still listen to us and follow our way... Luckily she's not staying with us... If not lagi worse.</font>.
 
I can feel my bb first movement last night when i quarrelling with my hubby haha.. When i quarrel with him i stop very suddenly and touch my stomach.. I am in a shock.. then my hubby thought what happen then very gan jiong.. I told him i feel his kick so last night bb kick me 3times.. I can see my stomach one side higher then another.. haha.. the bb is trying to stop our quarrelling i think..
 
<font face="Comic Sans MS,Tahoma"> Porky,
I always complains to my mum... and she will always say 忍 lor. Will complain to hb too but tt's when mil has reach my limit.. If small thing then I'll keep quiet but Remember ! hahaa</font>.
 
Porky,

Dun cry... just lock yourself in room.. my ILs will come into my room as well when i am not around, coz they need to bathe my girl in the toilet inside, and my girl's lotions are all inside my room..
Of course in the day time, they will come in also coz they help me to mop floor on weekdays when my girl is napping.. put clothes into my wardrobe etc..
But when i am at home, they do not come into my room, what's the purpose rite? I dun thinkthey would want to come in as well
happy.gif


Ya i think coz they are hubby's parents, we should respect them.. if they say something which you cant accept, just ignore, and dun take it into heart, otherwise you will feel stress..

As I say, staying with others is not always fun, but.. we just need to give and take, close one eye, and bo-chap, like that you won't have any issues with them.
 
<font face="Comic Sans MS,Tahoma"> Yuki,
Stay positive and happy always.. They always says if you're happy during pregnancy, ur bb will turn out to be a smilely and cheerful bb. But if u gets angry freq, u will hv a grouchy bb. Dunno how true is tt... bt better to look at the bright side and smile. =)</font>.
 
Porky,

I am going to my 16 weeks by end of this week.
I felt a bit scary ... i thought was stomach at first. But baby's turning was so fast by the time i use my hand to touch it ... the movement had stopped.
I told my hubby about it then he told me it was amazing and not scary. ha
 
xue, the best is dont stay together loh if have a choice. last time is my SIL stay with her. also cant stand her. then she say wan to move in to our house..we agree cos she got no place to go liao...and is too heartless to ask her rent a flat or stay in old age home..am i a good DIL ? now she will stay with us forever and have neverending quarrels...

yuki, happy for u. can feel ur boy kicks le. u all must be quarrel until too fierce thats why kick u 3 times. haha. i am still waiting. i tap my tummy and ask my bb to kick me..but still no response
 
Xue

I try so hard to be happy but my hubby always make me cry instead.
Sometime really feel like ending my life and that save the trouble lor.
We women suffer so much carrying their kid but they dun appreciate it.
We are someone children also le not without parents lor how can they be so mean.
I think if i really jump down then they will wake up.
 
yuki, dont say that lah...so sad leh..i also try to be happy alto have mil uphappy issue. and hubby also bo-chap altitude. but i am happy as long i know my bb is growing well inside. other things i dont care so much liao. early this year, i always feel down and depress...always thot that jump down then my hubby will wake up and learn abt my mil and me problems not solve...
 
Porky

Seriously i feel so scare lor when i cant feel anything from the bb then was thinking of going down to see Dr Adrian tml. I am so scare the bb have something wrong.
My family history got alot of m/c.
Since he kick me last night there should be no problem le.. wait till 18Dec then go for my appointment.
Yea last night quarrel till very fierce so think bb asking me to stop
 
yuki, try not to quarrel so much lah. since u say ur bb is by accident, so ur hubby is happy or not to be father ?

if my bb still no kick me until friday..i better see dr adrian liao. else later anything happen...i think really must jump down this time..
 
Hello mummies.. havent login for few days.. so many posts.. just vote for the gathering..

yuki and porky - your MILs sounds quite difficult to get along but must "ren".. jiayou wor..

Baby movements
So far I dont feel anything.. or probably there is but I dont know? I have encounter like cramping kind of slight pains..
 
<font face="Comic Sans MS,Tahoma"> Porky,
Agree. I'm against the idea of staying with MY mil. She's such a hypocrite that I cant stand her ways of doing things. But no choice, she's my hb's mum. Somehow or rather gonna show her some respect.

Yuki,
My hb was once too an inconsiderate and uncaring hb when i had my #1... But he changed alot when my son is out. And for this pregnancy, he show much more concern and he participate himself in this 10mths pregnancy run. So at the moment stay happy and positive for the sake of baby. </font>.
 
PORKY!! DUN ANYHOW SAY LA U!!!

Scary...

I dunno if he is happy anot cause at the first place we going for abortion de.. Then after talking my both parent they want us to keep. Then means i got to give up my job..
 
hi mummies,

Juz back from my amnio.... there was slight pain when the needle was poked in but all was over within 10 mins as my baby was cooperative and din move much when doc put in needle to draw fluid. From the scan, doc confirmed its a GIRL ! yay !

Hi Xue,
Pls assist to update my BB gender. Our EDD so close but yet I cant feel BB movements yet... Is it bcos mine is gal so less active ?

rc_cola, xue, yuki_lim,
You are all so young ! so many young mummies esp rc_cola and xue.... already expecting #2 liao...

MIL Prob:
to all those who having prob, realli must bo-chap lor... my MIL not around(passed away) liao when I met my hubby. So dun hv this prob as we live on our own. However, my own mother is nt so easy to live. I am now tinking if I shd engage CL even she volunteer to do confinement for me. As she is the type who anyhow cooks and comments that eat inside also release out mah. dont be so fussy.... and she eats 10 day vegetarian in a mth due to her religion. i am thinking if during CL she also anyhow cook for me, I sure feel depressed de...

Haiz... i shall see next 2 mths if she will boil any tonic for me. If nt, means she also wont bother during my CL.

Gathering:
Hope to meet up with all mummies !
 
Yuki,
I am one year older than you..
Me and xue same age :p

Try to not quarrel so much with hubby when pregnant.. i believe what xue said.. during my #1, i didnt quarrel at all with hubby, my girl came out to be very friendly and smiley..

Hm.. dun ever have any thought of suicide, it's veyr unhealthy, especially now that you are pregnant.. Be happy and stay positive k..

Porky,
haha ya it's best to stay on your own.. i plan to just stay at home after #2 is about a yr or so.. then my in laws can rest and enjoy their days back in indo already..
I dun mind doing housework and take care of bb everyday :p
Anyway, the house is hubby's, and in laws' house is in indo.. so i think if it's your own house, it's always better than if you are staying at their house..

Xue,
So active ar.. mine only harden... then move from right to left, up to bottom, kick occasionally.. Meg was more active last time..
 
Baby movements:
I'm 18 weeks 3 days oreadi but have not felt any movements... sigh... Maybe I've been hving pains here and there so even when bb move I don't realise it...

Porky: I just did a recontract cos my old modem kaput when I moved over to my new place.. It's also because Singtel was giving a free laptop... keekee
Pls dun let your MIL affect you too much if not you might hv pre/past natal depression... How many kids does your MIL hv?? 2 days ago my MIL call my hubby n told him that my FIL refuse to take his medication n my hubby had to travel all the way from Bedok to Hougang the next morning before work just to convince him .. Thankfully before my hubby set off, MIL call n say he finally took his medications... I was really Pi*s!!! Dun bottle any anger in yourself.... Come here and share with us... You will feel better...
 
Hi Hoops,

Dun worry too much. Better let your gynae check and see what's happening.

Last week I have smiliar incident like you. I went to see my gynae and he discover there's a growth. He given me two days bed rest and some med.
 
<font face="Comic Sans MS,Tahoma"> Babe,
My pleasure. =)

Firefly,
Congrats ! Hmm... When I had #1, i only feel him moving like arnd 20th wks? Since you just did your scan, Im sure ur girl is healthy since gynae didn't mention anything. Dun worry so much. =)

me and cola really very 巧. #1 and #2 same yr and mth. hahaa.

cola,
yea. #2 is much more active then #1. =)</font>.
 
Cola

My temper have always being very gd but after pregnant and mil problem my temper so scary..
Even my mum say i change..
Last time me no temper de..
I miss the old day ><
 
wow. congrats to all mummies out there who knw their gender.. hope to knw mine when i m in my 4th mth. btw, i heard 4th mth nid to withdraw 3 tubes of blood isit..? so scary lei. for waat huh? mus b painful man.
 
Firefly - gd luck to us for the amnio.

Yuki/Porky - Pls dun hv suicidal thoughts ley..I know it's hard la but just have to be brave for the beautiful baby inside you. I almost had post natal blues when I had my #1 coz of my mil too but she's my walking slimming machine, I lost 8kg after my confinement coz i was so stress wif mil, when I went for my post natal check up, the nurse thought her weigh scale went "kuku" haha...so my mil is not all that bad, she help me lose weight haha..
 
Firefly,
Rest k since you have just done your amnio.. hahaha girl is very fun to play with congrats!!

Yuki
Thanks thanks.. all my pregnancies come in planning haha..
Hubby is an organised guy, so when we got married in 2006, he said want to immediately have kid.. so we have #1 in 2007, the he plan for #2 in 2009, #3 would be in 2012.. but i am not sure if i am gonna close shop after this hahaa...

Staying at home is a luxury.. with your bb around, it is sure worth it to stay at home.. especially if your hubby can afford it..
Since my ILs are still willing to help us for another few year, they asked me to continue working first.. few years later if no one to look after bb, i will sure give up my job without any hesitation..
 

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