(2008/06) June 2008
- Thread starter avoros
- Start date
paulnelaine
Member
cactus,
i've already talk to my hubby, we have concluded tat is impossible for them to move back cos wat will they think ??? UNLESS they offer to move back themselves which is immpossible!!.... we can ask ZuEn how will she feels if her bro ask her n her sis to move out last time after they had their own kidshow will she feels???
lucky my younger SIL got BF liao but dont thk they will get married in e next 2yrs.... hubby also tell me cant rush them cos he dont want his sis to get married too rush just becos we want bac e room later if e marriage not good then she blame us. So in e end we can only wait but now e problem is not tat i want e room back immediately BUT LADIES do u all think i'm too much on e fact tat i want to put my things inside my SIL's room just becos i need space for myself n my children????????????????
i've already talk to my hubby, we have concluded tat is impossible for them to move back cos wat will they think ??? UNLESS they offer to move back themselves which is immpossible!!.... we can ask ZuEn how will she feels if her bro ask her n her sis to move out last time after they had their own kidshow will she feels???
lucky my younger SIL got BF liao but dont thk they will get married in e next 2yrs.... hubby also tell me cant rush them cos he dont want his sis to get married too rush just becos we want bac e room later if e marriage not good then she blame us. So in e end we can only wait but now e problem is not tat i want e room back immediately BUT LADIES do u all think i'm too much on e fact tat i want to put my things inside my SIL's room just becos i need space for myself n my children????????????????
Elaine, honestly I don't think it's too much. Hmm.. is your hb contributing much more than you towards the HDB flat/family? Or maybe there is some private arrangement between your hb and his sisters/MIL regarding the present situation... some reasons that you may not know? There are 2 reasons why your hb doesn't budge on this issue - it can't be that he doesn't love you or your kid(s), but maybe he has some reasons which you don't know about? That's why he cannot put your things inside SIL's room?
Elaine, I have a horrible thought. I hope the other ladies on this thread don't scold me for putting ideas into your head.
If I were in your shoes, I will contront my hb and ask him if he loves me/our kids or prefers to remain polite with his sisters/mother.
I will suggest selling away this 5 room HDB flat.. after all, lived in it for 5 years already right? can sell already. Now, sell at a profit. buy another one which is nearer to a good primary school (for the children's benefit). Must think long term.
But, the only reason that I will take up this move is if I financially contributed much more than my hb towards the flat and the family expenses. Cos then I can truly say the house is half mine too (or more than half!).
If I were in your shoes, I will contront my hb and ask him if he loves me/our kids or prefers to remain polite with his sisters/mother.
I will suggest selling away this 5 room HDB flat.. after all, lived in it for 5 years already right? can sell already. Now, sell at a profit. buy another one which is nearer to a good primary school (for the children's benefit). Must think long term.
But, the only reason that I will take up this move is if I financially contributed much more than my hb towards the flat and the family expenses. Cos then I can truly say the house is half mine too (or more than half!).
paulnelaine
Member
cactus,
hubby is always e head of e family, watever he says counts even they dont agree. Hubby also decide to put thgs inside SIL's room n already told SIL n MIL our arrangement last month but now e date getting nearer my MIL is like trying to give us alternative on where we can leave those thgs instead of putting into SIL's room. I have told my hubby abt wat happen in e morn n he will settle it when he comes back tonight, i know eventually all e thgs will still goes to SIL's room regards whether they want or dont want... wat i dont understand is tat why must MIL makes so much suggestion!!!! must she makes me tell her off tat that is my BOY's room to make her understand tat i have every rights where to put my things even i dont ask their permission!!!! NEXT time i thk i should just move anythg tat i dont need into e room n dont need to ask them.... now is like i'm begging ppl to give me space when e space belongs to me.
hubby is always e head of e family, watever he says counts even they dont agree. Hubby also decide to put thgs inside SIL's room n already told SIL n MIL our arrangement last month but now e date getting nearer my MIL is like trying to give us alternative on where we can leave those thgs instead of putting into SIL's room. I have told my hubby abt wat happen in e morn n he will settle it when he comes back tonight, i know eventually all e thgs will still goes to SIL's room regards whether they want or dont want... wat i dont understand is tat why must MIL makes so much suggestion!!!! must she makes me tell her off tat that is my BOY's room to make her understand tat i have every rights where to put my things even i dont ask their permission!!!! NEXT time i thk i should just move anythg tat i dont need into e room n dont need to ask them.... now is like i'm begging ppl to give me space when e space belongs to me.
paulnelaine
Member
cactus,
i've made ur suggestion earlier this yr..... whenever i'm not happy i will tell hubby why not we go buy a 3room flat so tat ur mum n sis will moved back their own hse n i can have 2bedrooms unlike me now staying in a five room flat with one bedroom.... hahahaaaaa btw my place here got a very good sch which i'm aiming to let my boy goes in, if he cant get a place there then e sch i'm currently working as quite good n not very far from my place.
i've made ur suggestion earlier this yr..... whenever i'm not happy i will tell hubby why not we go buy a 3room flat so tat ur mum n sis will moved back their own hse n i can have 2bedrooms unlike me now staying in a five room flat with one bedroom.... hahahaaaaa btw my place here got a very good sch which i'm aiming to let my boy goes in, if he cant get a place there then e sch i'm currently working as quite good n not very far from my place.
Elaine, actually I can understand your MIL's POV. To her, she has 2 unmarried daughters. you and your hb invited them to move in many years ago.. allowing your MIL to rent out the place. you probably appreciated the fact that your MIL is around to oversee the maid and your #1, so her presence in the flat is good for you and your hb too.It was previously a win-win situation for you, your hb and your ILs. But now, the flat is lacking in space. But the change was caused by your #2 arriving. Your MIL prob doesn't understand why your #2 arriving = things must invade into her daughter's personal space because it is part of her son's home. You already said that your hb is always the head of the family. Your MIL may feel that your hb is also the head of your family.. that you have no choice and no say. Maybe that's how your MIL thinks.
paulnelaine
Member
cactus,
my hubby is e one who told them abt putting thgs inside e room, ya i thk MIL dont want us to invade in her daughter's room. like wat i mention earlier MIL very scared of hubby cos yesterday already kena scolded by hubby when she suggest to put e thgs in e living room tat's y now she target to psycho me to put e thgs inside her room thinking tat i will agree n go help her psycho her son.
hubby will not want to stay in a 3 room flat la cos he used to stay in a smaller flat when he is younger so his aimis to get bigger flat tat's y we ended up with a 5room old flat instead of those new flat which e floor area quite small.
my hubby is e one who told them abt putting thgs inside e room, ya i thk MIL dont want us to invade in her daughter's room. like wat i mention earlier MIL very scared of hubby cos yesterday already kena scolded by hubby when she suggest to put e thgs in e living room tat's y now she target to psycho me to put e thgs inside her room thinking tat i will agree n go help her psycho her son.
hubby will not want to stay in a 3 room flat la cos he used to stay in a smaller flat when he is younger so his aimis to get bigger flat tat's y we ended up with a 5room old flat instead of those new flat which e floor area quite small.
cactus,
ooh..mrs wong got say for the eyes and ears can use cotton pads with warm water to wipe..but must be sterilise lah.. then juz wipe once from the inner eye to outside.. but for private parts can use baby wipes especially after they poo or pee..ooh yah..for umbilical cord must use sterilise cotton pad with umbilical cord spirit to clean..
ooh..mrs wong got say for the eyes and ears can use cotton pads with warm water to wipe..but must be sterilise lah.. then juz wipe once from the inner eye to outside.. but for private parts can use baby wipes especially after they poo or pee..ooh yah..for umbilical cord must use sterilise cotton pad with umbilical cord spirit to clean..
Elaine, I think a 3 room flat is not conducive for 2 kids + a maid. esp if you continue working, you will need an adult to watch over the maid while your kids are still young (when they start going to primary school, not that bad already). I think a decent home for you is a 4 room at least.. just my 2 cents' worth.
Hi,
Sorry to sidetrack a bit..
1st Qn: Can i ask how many maternity pads, nursing pads and disposable underwear are you ladies bringing to the hospital?
Cos maternity pads come in big packs and nursing pads comes in boxes (of 40) and i'm not sure how many to put in the hospital bag..
2nd Qn: This week is my 32nd week but my gynae is only seeing me on 16 may, which is 3 weeks from now.
I rem someone mentioned that from week 32 onwards, should be increasing the freq of gynae's visits to week 34, 36, 38, etc..
Should i worry? Cos i scare something will happen to baby in between these 3 weeks..
Thanks.
Sorry to sidetrack a bit..
1st Qn: Can i ask how many maternity pads, nursing pads and disposable underwear are you ladies bringing to the hospital?
Cos maternity pads come in big packs and nursing pads comes in boxes (of 40) and i'm not sure how many to put in the hospital bag..
2nd Qn: This week is my 32nd week but my gynae is only seeing me on 16 may, which is 3 weeks from now.
I rem someone mentioned that from week 32 onwards, should be increasing the freq of gynae's visits to week 34, 36, 38, etc..
Should i worry? Cos i scare something will happen to baby in between these 3 weeks..
Thanks.
hi Angel,
I'm bringing 24 matennity pads, 4 pairs of nursing pads and 16 pairs of underwear.
My doctor told me he will see me once every 2 weeks from 32nd week onwards. But he told me in between visits, if I feel uncomfortable, just to give him a call. If you feel you should be seeing your doctor once every 2 weeks, then ask him if it's possible. Are you on a package? If you are on a package, and if you had previously "disturbed" oyur doctor often enough, he may not be too keen to see you that often in the later stages of your pregnancy. If not, if you are still told to see him every 3 weeks, then monitor the bb yourself, and if you feel something may not be right, just give him a call?
I'm bringing 24 matennity pads, 4 pairs of nursing pads and 16 pairs of underwear.
My doctor told me he will see me once every 2 weeks from 32nd week onwards. But he told me in between visits, if I feel uncomfortable, just to give him a call. If you feel you should be seeing your doctor once every 2 weeks, then ask him if it's possible. Are you on a package? If you are on a package, and if you had previously "disturbed" oyur doctor often enough, he may not be too keen to see you that often in the later stages of your pregnancy. If not, if you are still told to see him every 3 weeks, then monitor the bb yourself, and if you feel something may not be right, just give him a call?
hi cactus,
wow.. thats alot of maternity pads and underwear..
saw that you ladies were discussing about sterilising cootton wool..
how to sterilise? need special solution, i presume? so dump cotton wool in solution n dry it to use again ah?
Goodness.. i sound silly.. Pls pardon my ignorance.. never sterilise before.. 1st time heard of it in fact..
wow.. thats alot of maternity pads and underwear..
saw that you ladies were discussing about sterilising cootton wool..
how to sterilise? need special solution, i presume? so dump cotton wool in solution n dry it to use again ah?
Goodness.. i sound silly.. Pls pardon my ignorance.. never sterilise before.. 1st time heard of it in fact..
feliciarosey
Active Member
angel,
I din bring any maternity pads, coz hospital will provide. And then i'll bring 4 pairs of nursing pads and 5 disposable underwear + 2 normal underwear.
As for gynae's visit, diff gynae had diff visiting schedule. My next visit is oso 4 weeks later, same as urs 16 May. Hey, btw u r under which gynae? Dr Ang?
I din bring any maternity pads, coz hospital will provide. And then i'll bring 4 pairs of nursing pads and 5 disposable underwear + 2 normal underwear.
As for gynae's visit, diff gynae had diff visiting schedule. My next visit is oso 4 weeks later, same as urs 16 May. Hey, btw u r under which gynae? Dr Ang?
paulnelaine
Member
i remember TMC provides maternity pads but is those loop type then every time must put 2pcs cos one is still not long enough after we just delivered. But i cant remember those they provide isit enough to last e 3days 2nite stay. I remember i brought my own too.
Haha! Yeah.. seems like alot of maternity pads hor! I read from somewhere that st 2 days, bleeding will be very heavy. If it is very heavy, chances are I hope to change once every 3 hours.. that's why prefer to bring 24 pads. 16 pairs, scared I stain.. haha.
Very unglam.
hi cactus and felicia,
my gynae is dr ang and he is in pte prac..
cactus: i never disturb him leh.. cos i thought if its common prac for other gynae to see their patients at every 2 weeks, how come mine didn't? so a bit worried..
felicia: yours oso dr ang, right? so you not worried about seeing him 4 weeks later?
my gynae is dr ang and he is in pte prac..
cactus: i never disturb him leh.. cos i thought if its common prac for other gynae to see their patients at every 2 weeks, how come mine didn't? so a bit worried..
felicia: yours oso dr ang, right? so you not worried about seeing him 4 weeks later?
paulnelaine
Member
angel,
i remember e nurse put 2 pcs i overlapping another to make it even longer so tat when we lie down it will not leak out. is normal for natural delivery to stay 3 days 2nite n c-section 4days 3nites.
i remember e nurse put 2 pcs i overlapping another to make it even longer so tat when we lie down it will not leak out. is normal for natural delivery to stay 3 days 2nite n c-section 4days 3nites.
Angel, if your package is unlimited visits, then maybe Dr Ang is very busy with other patients? So prefer to see you every 3 weeks? And also cos your pregnancy is uncomplicated? My understanding is govt hospitals recommend seeing patients every 2 weeks after 32 weeks... even for uncomplicated cases. I'm with SGH.
I think if you are concerned, just speak to Dr Ang. If he doesn't want to see you more often, then maybe you can call him if you suspect something may be wrong with the bb.
I think if you are concerned, just speak to Dr Ang. If he doesn't want to see you more often, then maybe you can call him if you suspect something may be wrong with the bb.
feliciarosey
Active Member
angel,
yup, mine oso! Before i went for my check up last week, oredy knew is still 4 weeks visit after this, coz i heard from Riz (whom is oso under Dr Ang). So it din came as a surprised for me.
Anyhow, DR Ang only told me if i had contradiction, bleeding or water bag burst then need to call him immediately.
Like wat cactus's said maybe ours is not those complicated pregnancies, tats why he only see us in 4 weeks. But if you feel any uncomfortable, you can still give him a call.
Wat time is your appointment?
yup, mine oso! Before i went for my check up last week, oredy knew is still 4 weeks visit after this, coz i heard from Riz (whom is oso under Dr Ang). So it din came as a surprised for me.
Anyhow, DR Ang only told me if i had contradiction, bleeding or water bag burst then need to call him immediately.
Like wat cactus's said maybe ours is not those complicated pregnancies, tats why he only see us in 4 weeks. But if you feel any uncomfortable, you can still give him a call.
Wat time is your appointment?
ellysia
Active Member
cactus,
Yr SIL can openly ask u like tat har? how old she is? i mean is her your hb younger or older sis? I tot its not v polite to ask this kind of question directly to u, if she want to ask she shd ask yr hb.
If my MIL ask me this question, i will also dunno how to ans, cos mine is more complicated as it involve my brother and i dun want my parents in law to know my family stuff too. MY mum will be upset if i divulge such stuff to my in laws.
Yr SIL can openly ask u like tat har? how old she is? i mean is her your hb younger or older sis? I tot its not v polite to ask this kind of question directly to u, if she want to ask she shd ask yr hb.
If my MIL ask me this question, i will also dunno how to ans, cos mine is more complicated as it involve my brother and i dun want my parents in law to know my family stuff too. MY mum will be upset if i divulge such stuff to my in laws.
Hi all,
See.. even govt hospitals oso advise to see gynae every 2 weeks after week 32.. thought pte dr should be more gan cheong.. sigh.. since dr thinks its not necessary to see him to many times then i guess no choice for me too..
cactus: i oso pai seh to ask him to increase visits unnecessarily.. dun wan to disturb him..
elaine n danryan: thanks for the info.. hmm.. if we gonna stay for 3 days 3 nights guess need to pack more stuff in the hospital bag..
felicia: maybe i didn't catch Riz's posting.. but i guess with dr ang's relaxed nature, its not surprising tat it would not be every 2 weeks..
my appt is at 1230 on 16 may, yours? i think i saw another mummy oso 16 may.. but forgot who liao..
See.. even govt hospitals oso advise to see gynae every 2 weeks after week 32.. thought pte dr should be more gan cheong.. sigh.. since dr thinks its not necessary to see him to many times then i guess no choice for me too..
cactus: i oso pai seh to ask him to increase visits unnecessarily.. dun wan to disturb him..
elaine n danryan: thanks for the info.. hmm.. if we gonna stay for 3 days 3 nights guess need to pack more stuff in the hospital bag..
felicia: maybe i didn't catch Riz's posting.. but i guess with dr ang's relaxed nature, its not surprising tat it would not be every 2 weeks..
my appt is at 1230 on 16 may, yours? i think i saw another mummy oso 16 may.. but forgot who liao..
Ellysia,
My SIL is my age.. haha. my hb's younger sister. Yeah.. it's not polite to ask lah, but she is quite comfortable with me. We are not the "polite polite" type of ILs. More like friends. But sometimes, she says things which make me a little upset like I told her I quit my old job so that I won't need to fly here fly there on work, and no need to work OT. Then she immediately say, "If I earn only $2k, I will definately not work OT." My blood boiled a little when I heard this loh.. cos I definately dun earn just $2k but many times more than that.... but I just let it pass, although I did complain to my hb!
My SIL is my age.. haha. my hb's younger sister. Yeah.. it's not polite to ask lah, but she is quite comfortable with me. We are not the "polite polite" type of ILs. More like friends. But sometimes, she says things which make me a little upset like I told her I quit my old job so that I won't need to fly here fly there on work, and no need to work OT. Then she immediately say, "If I earn only $2k, I will definately not work OT." My blood boiled a little when I heard this loh.. cos I definately dun earn just $2k but many times more than that.... but I just let it pass, although I did complain to my hb!
Angel,
govt hospital must see according to schedule.. cos have layers of checks. Private doctors don't have anyone checking on them, so they just exercise their own discretion. All doctors want the best for their patients mah. If there is more complicated case, they will definately want to see more frequently. If less complicated, and if doctor no time to see, then won't see so frequently. That's what I believe. Don't mind me saying this lah... private doctors eventually just want to earn more money... that's why if they offer unlimited visits in a package, they have to prioritize.
govt hospital must see according to schedule.. cos have layers of checks. Private doctors don't have anyone checking on them, so they just exercise their own discretion. All doctors want the best for their patients mah. If there is more complicated case, they will definately want to see more frequently. If less complicated, and if doctor no time to see, then won't see so frequently. That's what I believe. Don't mind me saying this lah... private doctors eventually just want to earn more money... that's why if they offer unlimited visits in a package, they have to prioritize.
feliciarosey
Active Member
angel,
I think the another mummy which u said is oso 16 may , high chance is me lah. hehee....
Mine is at 12.05, so maybe we'll bump into each oth.
Are you a 1st time mum? Coz in my opinion, Dr Ang is more suitable to those mummies with experiences, maybe 2nd pregnancy onwards. I wont be surprised he wont see us more often because he had too many patients liao. For me, watever i think is neccessary, i'll juz give him a call and if he said go down to see him, then i just go down to his clinic.
Btw, 16 May schedule seems to be very tight especially morning sessions. So, i think the waiting time is goin to be terrible.
I think the another mummy which u said is oso 16 may , high chance is me lah. hehee....
Mine is at 12.05, so maybe we'll bump into each oth.
Are you a 1st time mum? Coz in my opinion, Dr Ang is more suitable to those mummies with experiences, maybe 2nd pregnancy onwards. I wont be surprised he wont see us more often because he had too many patients liao. For me, watever i think is neccessary, i'll juz give him a call and if he said go down to see him, then i just go down to his clinic.
Btw, 16 May schedule seems to be very tight especially morning sessions. So, i think the waiting time is goin to be terrible.
cactus,
oh.. is it? i always thought pte dr better cos they will give more individualised attention.. (maybe i m being naive..)
true la.. i also agree that pte doc jus wan to earn more $$.. can see from their super packed schedule that the clinic jus keep on increasing the number of patients without thinking whether are they taking on too many patients or not..
oh.. is it? i always thought pte dr better cos they will give more individualised attention.. (maybe i m being naive..)
true la.. i also agree that pte doc jus wan to earn more $$.. can see from their super packed schedule that the clinic jus keep on increasing the number of patients without thinking whether are they taking on too many patients or not..
felicia:
hey.. your waiting time is very close to mine.. so we will see each other..
yes.. i'm a 1st time mum.. so you will call him whenever you have discomfort? so far i have never called him before.. dun know when to call leh.. e.g. usu when i got stomachache, i will wait n see, usu it will go away after a day or so.. so never call dr ang before..
i oso think dr ang seems to be packing alot of ppl on 16 may cos he is going for short holiday after that cos of long weekend (mon is public hol).. so dun know whether i should change or not..
cos once we had appt after a public hol and we waited 1 hour before we can see him.. normally i only waited 20-30 min..
so you going to stick to 16 may?
hey.. your waiting time is very close to mine.. so we will see each other..
yes.. i'm a 1st time mum.. so you will call him whenever you have discomfort? so far i have never called him before.. dun know when to call leh.. e.g. usu when i got stomachache, i will wait n see, usu it will go away after a day or so.. so never call dr ang before..
i oso think dr ang seems to be packing alot of ppl on 16 may cos he is going for short holiday after that cos of long weekend (mon is public hol).. so dun know whether i should change or not..
cos once we had appt after a public hol and we waited 1 hour before we can see him.. normally i only waited 20-30 min..
so you going to stick to 16 may?
feliciarosey
Active Member
angel,
During my #1, by wk30 onwards, will be once forthnightly, then by wk 36 is weekly. And in fact that gynae dont had much patients, tats why he can afford to see the patients more frequently. But of course, his fee is very, very ex compare to Dr Ang.
Tats why when Dr Ang visit is still 4 weeks after wk30, i'm able to accept as long as i feel my condition is ok.
During my #1, by wk30 onwards, will be once forthnightly, then by wk 36 is weekly. And in fact that gynae dont had much patients, tats why he can afford to see the patients more frequently. But of course, his fee is very, very ex compare to Dr Ang.
Tats why when Dr Ang visit is still 4 weeks after wk30, i'm able to accept as long as i feel my condition is ok.
ellysia
Active Member
babycupid and cactus,
I ored machine wash my bb clothes last weekend, using a laundry bag. I feel handwash may not be clean enuff, also lazy to wash. i even use dryer for bb clothes but i put gentle dry selection. Seems ok.
elaine,
I tink yr hb is sacrificing yr boy for his sis lor. i mean, yr MIL ored has a house elsewhere and they are collecting rental, then why not they move back and left the house for u and yr children benefit??
Its also bad tat u and yr hb and yr boy has to share 1 queen size bed together!
and to wait until yr SILs get married, wat if they dun have married at all?? 5 years down the road u will have 2 kids one possibly at Pri sch and another in Kindergarten and both need their space to study. without a good place, how to study?? won't be good for their physical devt.
I ored machine wash my bb clothes last weekend, using a laundry bag. I feel handwash may not be clean enuff, also lazy to wash. i even use dryer for bb clothes but i put gentle dry selection. Seems ok.
elaine,
I tink yr hb is sacrificing yr boy for his sis lor. i mean, yr MIL ored has a house elsewhere and they are collecting rental, then why not they move back and left the house for u and yr children benefit??
Its also bad tat u and yr hb and yr boy has to share 1 queen size bed together!
and to wait until yr SILs get married, wat if they dun have married at all?? 5 years down the road u will have 2 kids one possibly at Pri sch and another in Kindergarten and both need their space to study. without a good place, how to study?? won't be good for their physical devt.
feliciarosey
Active Member
angel,
Initially wanna change to 15 May coz i think is not so nice to take a long holiday as Mon is PH. But my collegue whom is my back up, said is ok. So, i'll stick to it lor. Anyhow, i plan to go for my lunch after i pass the appointment book to the admin. If still got time, can juz go to library.
Btw, you can request the admin to give you a call when ur turn is arriving soon, then u can shop around.
Not too sure how many times i called him, maybe 2-3 times kua. There's once i had brown discharge , so i called him and he asked me to go down to his clinic. And oso there's times when i feel unsure of certain thing i'll called him to ask for opinion. He's ok when u called him to ask anything which u r unsure.
Initially wanna change to 15 May coz i think is not so nice to take a long holiday as Mon is PH. But my collegue whom is my back up, said is ok. So, i'll stick to it lor. Anyhow, i plan to go for my lunch after i pass the appointment book to the admin. If still got time, can juz go to library.
Btw, you can request the admin to give you a call when ur turn is arriving soon, then u can shop around.
Not too sure how many times i called him, maybe 2-3 times kua. There's once i had brown discharge , so i called him and he asked me to go down to his clinic. And oso there's times when i feel unsure of certain thing i'll called him to ask for opinion. He's ok when u called him to ask anything which u r unsure.