(2007/03) March 2007 MTBs

wa autum
you are so cheam
i like to be close to YE, and yes, maybe one day when she stops sticking to me, i will feel sad. but my behavior now stems from my bad temper i think (at least i'm not aware of what i'm not aware of). haha

bunnie
i'm not flexi in that sense. i usu plan to go out half an hour early. so if YE fusses and refuses to get into the car for instance, i have half an hour for her to do her business. till she sian liao then we can set off

that's why when we go for kindermusik on weekdays, we are usually v early cos she behaves most of the time. except for once or twice
 


SQ: if i go loo or go get soemthing, I will tell V one leh ... like mummy go get book, mummy go shh shh, then i will tell her "wait for mummy ok?" sometimes she's not willing so she will go with me to the loo and hand me the tiolet paper ...

i think the CC let them cried it out ... the teacher practically carried her the whole day, even the principal had a go to try to pat her to sleep ... now she is slighty better, won't cry so much, so hopefully, when my maid goes back for her home trip, it won't start all over again!!!
 
star:if the kid can sit on the potty by himself.. then it i sok.. but for some kids.. they need to be distracted/entertained to sit on the potty for a substained period of time.. rahter then going thru a battle of wills about this.. like bunnie's ribena's sweets eg lah.
u are blessed.. hence i say Rae is easy to toilet train lah..

yes.. potty books while in potty is one of the recommended ways
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bunnie/star
ok, i will start telling her when i go toilet

tomr am i intend to let hubby and her drop off while i park the car. so hopefully she doesn't sudd think of me in class and start crying like today
 
re: toilet training
I find myself with 2 totally different kids for potty training so I guess different things work for different kids.

starfruit,
from your descriptions, I also feel that Rae is ready. Cos she'll pee and try to poo on a toilet bowl and she's able to gestulate/articulate, able to pull down her pants & etc ... And did you notice that her diapers are drier after a period of time? That was one of Reyes' sign too.
 
star: nothing to contribute to potty training - my gal just wont, and she only tell us "wet wet" after she pees in her diaper. Prob have to ask my mum for help, the thing is my place is marble floor and my mum's place is tiles, so if she pees, very dangerous as very slippery and wat's more my mum's place got 3 oldies.
 
SQ,
ok, then since u know (or u think) that your behavior stems from your 'bad temper'.. then u should do something about it. Just to say, I am not judging u hor.. i am just thinking very rationally.. ie. u know what is the problem, so solve the problem at the root. That's how i look at it. Cos if u can make effort to remove the problem, then maybe everyone else is happier.

hmm.. but that doesn't seem to have anything to do with the child being sticky hor.. unless we are talking about the subconcious-behavior (assuming there is such a thing).. ok, hope i am not confusing u! :p
 
SQ: i think get into the practice of telling her all the time whenever u need to leave her, even if its to the toilet or to go pick sumthing up from the next room. Think esp now. YE feeling extremely insecure, u have to double ur effort to assure her even more.

astro: icic.. ya she cna sit there and still prentend and go shhh shh or nnng..nnng... like trying to gek.. haha quite funny.
 
Autum: no lah. not train EJ to read on potty.. (alamak. am i that confusing that night?).. if u train EJ to read on the potty.. it means that EJ will not read unless he is on the potty . isn't that hilarious?! hahha.. sorry i find that very funny now .. sorry sorry.. what i mean is.. is to get EJ to SIT down.. by distracting him with a book first.. then take the book away. perhaps u can be there to talk to him wen he does the business.. also can.. anything. just make the boy sit down.. lah..that is a totally DIFFERNT intention .. as compared to training EJ to read on potty! :p

Gina ford also recommends kids to observe the mummies when they pee.. so that the kid can imitate teh guesture..and to proceed if the kid is comfortable with pulling off and sitting down...
if i am alone with teng.. i ok.. but now when ellie's around..
 
starfruit,
but hor, once you start then there's no turning back liao, you'll have to be prepared for nights and outside too else you might be stressed about it. That's why I've been putting Reyden's training on hold. Partly cos he's not ready yet too. He simply refused to poo on the toilet bowl too and his diapers are always wet and heavy.
 
irin: rae dun tell me when she wants to pee one. but when i put her on the toilet bowl, she can pee. so i also confused. sometime i ask her to shh shh when we are in the toilet bathing, then she will gek for a while and shh shh will come.. heheh. so is is ready ah? she also dun tell me when she poo but she will be tell me to change for her after she poo.!
 
SQ: tt's wat we did for 2 weeks of CC - i'll drive then my hubby will drop her off ... then i say i can't go down with her cuz mummy driving ... she's ok then will wave byebye to me. i understand ur temper bit, but i resolved to be different from my mum :p I dun have the same hung ups as her, and I certainly do not want to keep scolding or beating my kids. One thing i remember from one of those "smacking" sessions with V, was that I smack her, she cry, then all the oldies rush and say why beat her? I bo chup just carry her into the bedroom and locked the door. she stand 1 side cry, i sit on the bed and look away. until her sobs quieten down then i look at her. my gal first words to me was "hug hug" so i went over and hug her. as much as we want to discipline our kids, we should always remember to show/ reassure them of our love. I dun wan to be like my mum AGAIN, scream and yell down the whole house, then go and kiss the kids when they are crying in an attempt to make them stop. it's sending all the wrong messages!
 
i hate to have to run to the toilet outside when they need a pee or poo man. yucks. esp the ladies are so dirty. aiyo

star
on! start tomr! although i already know mil will hate me for it cos she always ask me to siam. but i still do it. haha
 
Irin: thats why i say i think rae not ready cos she dun tell me when she pees or poos when we are outside. hey have u had any accident with reyes outside yet?

Astro/Autum: i alwasy let rae watch when i pee one.. cos she insist that I cannot close the door.. so she knows the toilet bowl is for peeing and pooing.. heheh

astro: i also tink its hilarious.. the bit on training to read on a potty.. hahah
 
Astro,
hahahah.. i am also laughing at the part about training to read on potty! :p well.. the thing is, he can sit there but that's all he will do. when he wants to poo, he must stand up! that's the headache part. and he screams if we try to hold him down. then he won't poo.. then i worry he constipate, so i don't insist.
 
Starfruit,
ya, she should be ready. My guess is she won't tell you she had pee cos she has diapers on. You try to let her go without diaper at home and keep reminding her that she's without a diaper and need to pee in potty/toilet bowl, think she'll be able to tell you. Maybe 1st few times will have accident lah.
At least it bothers her that she has poo in the diaper, it's one of the sign too. Reyden can go around with poo in his diaper and not bothered by it at all.
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SQ: hmmm.. just know that. YE is blessed to have u as her mother.. ok
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i always believe.. the child is matched to her/his mother.. most of the time. they compliment one another .. i always cite titu and seth as an classic eg of this.. sometimes i also cite teng and myself. i cannot handle boisterious kids.. so teng is so dull lor. ha
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ya. the diaper can get drier. as mentined by RR. coz now.. they are able to hold for a longer period of time.. while passing a greater amount at each go.. hence u see.. it is almost impossible o say a kid is toilet trained by a few months.. coz they let go small small quantities all the time.. and actually it is the parents who toilet train themselves..

Star: ya. put her in training pants.. teng is in training pants in the day when he is not at purple train/not going out..
most time.. no accidents. sometimes will have lah..

Bunnie: able to differentiate wetness is a sign as well.. Vanessa is getting ready!
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bunnie
after such sessions, YE's first words will always be " bao bao". sometimes i'm so mad that to prevent myself from whacking her, the "best" i can do is to tell her "you are naughty. mama doesn't like it when you... stop crying and i will bao bao"

sometimes i just tell her "no bao bao until you stop crying!"

i know i'm v suay, but if i dun do this, i sure whack her and let her cry as much as she likes. i always tell hubby that since she "likes" to cry, i will whack her and "help" her along

but i never say that in front of her lah. though equally mean
 
Astro, SQ,
actually my sentiment is also somewhat similar to the part about what Astro says "child is matched to mother"... that's why I said that subconciously, SQ wants YE to stick to her..
 
starfruit,
oh, you'll have to start at home 1st. When she has no "accidents" at home then you slowly try to go out without diaper (initially maybe for a short while then slowly extend). But must still bring her to the toilet often.

I started off with pull-ups when we were ouside then I told her it's an underwear and she cannot pee in it, must tell me if she wants to pee. That's just in case of accidents. After a few times she came back with a dry diaper then we let her go out completely without anything. She had 2 accidents outside so far. Both incidents happened when she was crying.
 
Autum: got to start somewhere then.. make him sit down.. distract him (hence i suggest a book).. maybe a toy car? or someting lah. just to make him sit down. he needs some form of associations to make him realise he sits to poo.. coz when in diapers. they poo anytime anywhere any position. so u need to create te association to sit down to poo for EJ.. might need to be more proactive. hence they say it is potty 'training' lor.. creative parentin.. i remembered u saying it.. so apply it lah..if u not comfortable with the book..
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SQ: aiyo of cos YE wants bao bao think when all ou kids are upset, first thing they want is for us to bao bao an assure them that all is ok.

irin: but once i start, i have to be consistent right? cannot one day in training pants and one day not in training pants right?
maybe when she is awake, we put her in training pants, but when she goes to bed, we put her in diapers.

Astro: wha so enlightening.. so rae is match to me.. no wonder i am soo sticky to her and she also likes to stick to me.. haha
 
astro: wanna to add on to ur sentence, actually its also cos we as parents have also been trained to deal with our kids' behaviour since they were a baby lah.
 
Autum: ermm.. i dun mean SQ wants YE to stick to her.. i say.. in a relationship.. u have one person who can curb the other. .or simply the two are programmed in such a way. they dun get on one another toes lah.. seth can be as boisterious as he wants..coz titu can thumb him down FLAT FLAT :p.. me and teng dun step on one another coz.. he not boisterious for me to lose control over.. just like miser and me. complimentary..

gosh.. today i have a problem with my articulation! :p i think start from evening liao. no wonder miser keeps laughing! :S
 
Starfruit,
ya, that's why I say no turning back cos they are too young to understand the different situations. Like even if you put on diapers for her at night, she will still wake up a few times and wants to go pee in the toilet bowl. And when you are outside and can't find a clean toilet, she still won't want to pee in a diaper/pull up. It was quite stressful for awhile.
 
Astro,
i think i will have uphill task. cos EJ associates pooing with standing up. he doesn't poo lying down or sitting down etc.. he only poos standing up. had been like that for quite many months. hmm, maybe i try to let him poo standing up over a potty first? haha..

SQ,
aiyoh.. please don't say "retribution" la. nothing is so serious.. YE simply loves u too much.. how can u say it's retribution. Look on the positive side!
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Irin: actually i am not so concern that i cannot find a clean toilet.. my only worry is that i cannot find a toilet at all when i am outside!!!
 
SQ: guess what? i think also karma.. hahaha. hence u see lah. i got a hb whose is like that.. my boy also turning out to be like his papa. if #2 is also like this.. then i am really the bad tempered monster at home liao.. which i am not lor.. chey. ha
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star: how so? i am refering more to the parent's innate personality and the bb's personality wor..
 
SQ: u no the bao bao or love is unconditional, so even as mad as u are with YE, when u have both calm down, shd never say "u notti tt's why mummy this mummy tt" it comes wat u call that ... conditioning? i am not judging you lah, but if u feel ur temper is an issue, amybe u shd seek "help" for it :p my family has this insane streak of bad temper ... and i can tell u it runs for generations. whether genetic or nuture, I resolved to be "different" to my gal, but i am v bias, cuz I will shout at my niece and nephew esp when they don't do their homework. Also why I more than happy if my gal wants to go and ka chaw my siblings instead of me. they go ask why i so bo chup also, but to me, if she's not interested in me then, why force her when she's happily playing with her aunties/ uncles/ cousins? i can't be a SAHM for sure, so i salute those mummies :p
 
astro: cos he/she is ur kid lah.. so sometimes.. ur tolerence level of ur own kids is much higher as compared to other kids.. thats why lots of parents can "handle" they own kids! And since young, u already know their "patterns" and by knowing ur kid so well, u also know how to handle them better too. U get what i am trying to say here.
 
Irin!
hey, u just reno your house right? got spare tiles or bricks? can give me a few pcs?? hee..

Astro,
i know u don't have same thinking as me.. but what i meant by the match part is, YE behaves like that cos SQ wants her to behave like that (subconsciously).. so that's what i mean by the 'match' part.. aiya.. i think we better stop confusing everyone else! :p
 
my mum said.. i was an easy child.. my grandma always had no problem to make me eat.. and i was told i eat A LOT.. ha. maybe that' s why my built.. but i dun think i gave my parents a hard time for being soft right? or reserved? why is my son like that? alamak..
ok.. must be miser's side.. he was a wild kid.. so teng got to 'compensate' that part. hence teng is so stubborn and persistent.. all miser's fault lah..
 
starfruit,
ya, that's one of the concern too lor. But some toilets are really ... like recently when we went Qian Hu. The toilets were so dirty and smelly till I feel like vomitting type. And we couldn't find any other toilets nearby and Reyes refused to do it in the diaper and I got no choice but to let her pee into a drain.
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star: i see.. yes i see ur pt.. but would u also feel that personalities play a part here? if parents fiery.. kids also fiery.. wah .. CALAMITY :p
yin-yang?? fire-wire.. ba-gua?? :pP

autum: ha.. i will try to be clearer.. :p
 
Autum,
I've got no bricks lah, not building a house. :p The spare tiles are the living room homogenous tile, quite big pieces leh. You want it for??
 
Astro,
yalor, why u say Teng 'difficult'??

re: karma?
i don't believe got such thing (about our kids and us).. where got such thing.. every child grows up differently la.
 


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