Support group - Miscarriages

[Chew Sok Koon]

i just had miscarriage on Monday. Is my first child and it only 6 wee skis.very sad and devastating.

Any advise if I can still try again ?

Hi shs_ismail, sure you can try again. So sorry about your lost. Totally understand the emotions as I just had m/c two weeks ago. You still can try again but make sure your health recovers and also check with your doctor and see what he recommends. Just take care of your health first.

 

[dolly_gal]

Hi mei, I m not sure are the supplements n massage I went this round helps me besides I see tsb. U may want to take fish oil n coq10 200mg daily w ur dh. The massage I went is to circulate hormones, I did ard 3-4 times before er.. I just tell myself if it doesn't help just take it as relaxation then..
I ordered the supplements from gnc usa n ship via comgateway, it still much cheaper than buying in sg.. u can check it out

 

[Chew Sok Koon]

hi_mei, how are your feeling now? Just take some time to grief as much as you want. I was crying when I was pushed into the OP and woke up crying as well. It is normal. Just take care of your health and try again when you are healthy again. That is what all the ladies here are doing as well. We don't give up hope and keep trying.

By the way ladies, I am also thinking of buying pandora for myself to remember the little one that I had but not meant to come to this world. But I think my hubby may not very supportive of getting things like that to remind him of the pain and disappointment.

 

[dolly_gal]

Sok koon, u just go ahead n get something to rem ur angel. No need tell dh cos I feel everyone has different way of grieving or walking out of it..

 

[hi_mei]

Hi mei, I m not sure are the supplements n massage I went this round helps me besides I see tsb. U may want to take fish oil n coq10 200mg daily w ur dh. The massage I went is to circulate hormones, I did ard 3-4 times before er.. I just tell myself if it doesn't help just take it as relaxation then..
I ordered the supplements from gnc usa n ship via comgateway, it still much cheaper than buying in sg.. u can check it out

Yup i also take fish oil cuz I had it reduces endo and inflammation... But didn't take for v long... If u dont mind sharing, where did u do the massage?

hi_mei, how are your feeling now? Just take some time to grief as much as you want. I was crying when I was pushed into the OP and woke up crying as well. It is normal. Just take care of your health and try again when you are healthy again. That is what all the ladies here are doing as well. We don't give up hope and keep trying.

By the way ladies, I am also thinking of buying pandora for myself to remember the little one that I had but not meant to come to this world. But I think my hubby may not very supportive of getting things like that to remind him of the pain and disappointment.

Thanks for asking... Still quite upset... Feel that this whole thing is so unfair. Some of my friends have pcos and still conceive naturally and easily! Me no issue yet fail ivf 3 times.... And have to go thru this horrible op.... Just have to keep trying. My DH v worried abt cost so I was thinking the next few ivf I pay myself liao...

 

[hi_mei]

Sok koon, think women function differently from men. If getting the pandora gives u closure and peace, go ahead and get it. Like what dolly gal says, no need to tell DH abt it. It can be something just for yourself.

 

[dolly_gal]

This is the contact.. u just wear ur normal clothes, preferably shorts or pants. He dun use any oil at all so no smell. Abt $50 for an hour...

 

[dolly_gal]

I rem clearly my fav is to received flowers but all these years, dh only bot once during dating n rom n wedding day.. after my dnc I wanted to see flowers but he didn't buy, he say bcos the flowers in hospital are so standard design so I thot no hope. The bouquet of flowers came few months later when he was in the mood to cheer me up.. I must say by then we have move on 80% liao...

 

[princessleopard]

Princess n mango i agree...sigh really duno y dun look after still can strike n ppl like us tried soooo hard...medicine la acupuncture la, no cold drinks la....yet still cannot keep bb...going to see doctor tomorrow hopefully good news...as in no need DnC , everything clear...since i took the pill...
But yes agree with dolly, just focus on our body now...at least conceived once/twice means we can conceive!
Shs welcome here...we share our grief here together, vent out here n move on tog b stronger

Yup, I think likewise too. 5 years of ttc journey, 2 mcs, I really refrain from eating and doing so much things. All I want is a healthy baby, that's all.

Never mind, we just keep trying. One day, we will ALL have our rainbow baby!! JIAYOU, LADIES!!

 

[Kengyam]

Hi ladies, i have friends who had miscarriage , unable to conceived cases. After they were being introduce to taking Reserve ( for both husband & wife ) months later they get their results. So happy for them !! Give it a try. Im no expert in science but there is already something in the market that can help get pregnant even couples tried for 8yrs... 8yrs is a very long time.

 

[shs_ismail]

thank u for ur advise ladies. i on 2 weeks hospitalization leave. and was admitted 3 days in hospital. very emotional after read all ur advise and support. i will do check up tom at kk hospital. i didnt go any abortion to clear in out but it coming out naturally.


Is folic acid good to take ?

 

[hi_mei]

thank u for ur advise ladies. i on 2 weeks hospitalization leave. and was admitted 3 days in hospital. very emotional after read all ur advise and support. i will do check up tom at kk hospital. i didnt go any abortion to clear in out but it coming out naturally.


Is folic acid good to take ?

It is a tough time for u. Come to forum to talk to us if need to. The sisters here have helped me a lot

Yes folic acid is gd when u want to conceive.

 

[haze02]

Hi ladies,
Finally manage to read finish the posts... Hehe!
Been away to handle my work... So many tasks to handle aft back from MC.
Gosh... Felt like giving up and go back focus on recovery and TTC..

Btw... Something to share. I did some online search on how to improve egg condition.
Seems like a lot of ppl recommend CoQ10.. I bought some online. Can't wait to try it. Hope it works for me.

 

[bliswifu]

Mei n dolly u all r v brave ladies...having gone through ivf aint something easy...i did one so iui, scheduled to go ivf too but got this miracle bb n lost it...no matter how tough, i think we really work sooo hard...n i believe god whatever religion we believe in will give us healthy children in the end....btw dolly i took coq10 too...i think it does help...
Let's not give up..! We will definitely emerge stronger, better bond with our hubby, n good parents in future!

 

[hi_mei]

Bliswifu we will all hold our rainbow babies one day

I was thinking to take coq10 and fish oil until my next ivf cycle. Also go for more regular acupuncture and take chinese medicine to tiao hao the body. If we can all get pregnant once, no reason why we cannot do it again. Just need to try until success

Also heard from one forum sister about intralipids infusion and might try it the next time...

Is it ok to start exercising (like running/swimming) two weeks after d n c?

 

[hopeful_mum]

Bliswifu we will all hold our rainbow babies one day

I was thinking to take coq10 and fish oil until my next ivf cycle. Also go for more regular acupuncture and take chinese medicine to tiao hao the body. If we can all get pregnant once, no reason why we cannot do it again. Just need to try until success

Also heard from one forum sister about intralipids infusion and might try it the next time...

Is it ok to start exercising (like running/swimming) two weeks after d n c?

don't go for swimming. coz may have infection. for swimming hold on till maybe 4 weeks later. cervix may still be open now.

Running is fine, if u used to run. Just don't over exert yourself.

 

[Give a hope]

Hi ladies,
Finally manage to read finish the posts... Hehe!

Been away to handle my work... So many tasks to handle aft back from MC.
Gosh... Felt like giving up and go back focus on recovery and TTC..

Btw... Something to share. I did some online search on how to improve egg condition.
Seems like a lot of ppl recommend CoQ10.. I bought some online. Can't wait to try it. Hope it works for me.

Which web u order coq10?

 

[bliswifu]

Yes mei i took coq10 n doc asked me take dhea too...i will continue these vitamins after clearance...just went to see Dr n sigh...not fully cleared...still have a lump left!!! So going insert 2 more pills n hopefully can clear...! Suddenly have a crazy thought...to drink cold drinks hahahaa maybe can help expel hor .... But yes it is just a crazy thought ...!
Give a hope u can buy coq10 from pharmacy..i saw Gnc selling...but i bought from Dr directly though...u can also try iherbs.com...i got my dhea there

 

[shs_ismail]

It is a tough time for u. Come to forum to talk to us if need to. The sisters here have helped me a lot

Yes folic acid is gd when u want to conceive.

will do and talk to u ladies here. what is coq10 ?

 

[shs_ismail]

some of my gfs said this is good. maybe u girls want to try this out. i am taking blackmore folic acid too before i get preggy then after 6 weeks i m/c. to be honest with u gals, i am abit pissed off with my colleague when i declare that i am preggy, they take things lightly and make me alot of walking for my work.

 

[hi_mei]

will do and talk to u ladies here. what is coq10 ?

Coq10 is coenzyme q10, supposed to help with egg quality. U can easily find it at any health shop. Btw it sounds like ur colleagues were really not v nice, but at this period of pregnancy, loss is usually due to genetic anomaly in the baby, so ur body removed it naturally.... Not caused by anything the mother did. Anw I heard u are more fertile after a miscarriage so just try again when u are ready k?

Yes mei i took coq10 n doc asked me take dhea too...i will continue these vitamins after clearance...just went to see Dr n sigh...not fully cleared...still have a lump left!!! So going insert 2 more pills n hopefully can clear...! Suddenly have a crazy thought...to drink cold drinks hahahaa maybe can help expel hor .... But yes it is just a crazy thought ...!
Give a hope u can buy coq10 from pharmacy..i saw Gnc selling...but i bought from Dr directly though...u can also try iherbs.com...i got my dhea there

Oh dear!! Hope the lumps can come out this time. Dun drink cold drinks la, bad for ur health now... heard of ppl taking dang gui to force the remaining tissue out though but have nv tried it. Best to listen to doctor....

 

[dolly_gal]

I tried conceive well before, can't swallow it down properly n couple of times I feel nausea after taking it. So I gave up. I took folic acid, fish oil n coq10 separately.. mil made my dh take the following daily as well

 

[haze02]

Which web u order coq10?

I order from online drugstore and I sprees it with someone.
Drugstore having promotion. Which is a lot cheaper then singapore store.

 

[dolly_gal]

U can try gnc usa, their weekly promo can b quite good..

 

[haze02]

Normally I prefer to sprees then ship them back myself... I'm a lazy bum. Hahaha!

 

[princessleopard]

some of my gfs said this is good. maybe u girls want to try this out. i am taking blackmore folic acid too before i get preggy then after 6 weeks i m/c. to be honest with u gals, i am abit pissed off with my colleague when i declare that i am preggy, they take things lightly and make me alot of walking for my work.

I tried this before, cos I also heard from some ladies saying this is good. I got preggy 3 months after taking this, not sure if it is really because of this, but conceiving for me is not easy. But it still ended up in mc. I still continue to take for another 6 months after mc, then I stopped. Like what dolly_gal said, I also had problem swallowing the pills and the taste is awful for me.

So now, I am not taking any prenatal supplement, as I dunno what else is good. I just drink my daily ensure life and folic acid.

 

[Chew Sok Koon]

Dear ladies, I didn't know about Coenzyme q10. Is it like a vitamins that can be taken everyday? I read online that it does also help to boost fertility. Can we take this when we are taking TCM? Any side effects? I dun really know what do I need to take after my D&C. Only know to continue with folic acid and my TCM for these two months.

 

[dolly_gal]

No side effect n can b taken daily. I only stop taking after bfp when I ask my gynae.. he ask me stop first.. but for healthy reason I still made dh take daily. It's best to take fish oil n coq10 together

 

[hi_mei]

Hi I was wondering do the cramps from d n c get worse? After doing on mon it was pretty painful. It went away on Tue. But now the cramps are coming back though there is no more bleeding...

 

[dolly_gal]

Tik okay earlier posts some mentioned the uterus is contracting back to normal size hence the cramps. For my case it was peaceful after dnc, no cramps nor bleeding. Just loose stools for a week plus mayb bcos of confinement food as well.

 

[hi_mei]

Hmmm ok thanks dolly gal!

 

[Chew Sok Koon]

Hi I was wondering do the cramps from d n c get worse? After doing on mon it was pretty painful. It went away on Tue. But now the cramps are coming back though there is no more bleeding...

Hi_mei, it is normal to have bad cramps. I had two bad cramps on different days (on and off) and was having blot clots discharged. Doc said it is normal as the uterus is recovering back to it's normal size and the body will push out all the unwanted tissues. If it is really bad, take the painkillers that doc gave but I try not to take it unless it is really really unbearable.

 

[hi_mei]

Actually I was speaking to my colleagues and I realise a lot of them have had miscarriages.it is really v common just that ppl dun want to talk abt it. The good news is, every single one of them went on to have successful pregnancies. it is v encouraging... Jiayou everyone here

 

[shs_ismail]

Have anyone of you go massage ? I have this mak cik is very good . If u want have her ctc .let me know.

 

[mangohope]

Hi mei I agree after pple around me know I had a mc I realized a lot of them also had mc

It's rather common, my friend mum mc once before having her, one sister, brother and lastly long fong. I hope I can one shot have twins or longfong den close shop hehe! My friend is talking about having a third one now hais they are so lucky. I just want one also difficult. I silently mute the group chat if not quite painful to read on their conversation.

 

[hi_mei]

Ya actually when I talk to others abt their MC then I don't feel so bad. At first I felt I was really the odd (and unlucky) one out.

Ya mangohope ur friend's mother very productive eh.... Ya best long fong I close shop liao... This baby making thing is so tiring.
Groupchat just mute lor. I hardly go facebook nowadays also... Keep seeing my friends post baby photos. Worst thing is, abt 4 of my good friends due 2nd half of this yr... I was originally to be with them. Now i think I go their baby shower will cry, thinking of the lost one.... Haiz...

 

[princessleopard]

It's rather common, my friend mum mc once before having her, one sister, brother and lastly long fong. I hope I can one shot have twins or longfong den close shop hehe! My friend is talking about having a third one now hais they are so lucky. I just want one also difficult. I silently mute the group chat if not quite painful to read on their conversation.

LOL, I thought so too. Though we may be a bit compare to our friends of same age, but if can have twins, then we can make it up. One friend of mine was married in early 20s, but no kids all along. Till this year she had a twin after 10 years marriage. Then we knew they also have problem in ttc, she got her rainbow twins through ivf. Most friends of same age all have at least 2 kids now. Have to jiayou lo!

 

[Chew Sok Koon]

Ya actually when I talk to others abt their MC then I don't feel so bad. At first I felt I was really the odd (and unlucky) one out.

Ya mangohope ur friend's mother very productive eh.... Ya best long fong I close shop liao... This baby making thing is so tiring.
Groupchat just mute lor. I hardly go facebook nowadays also... Keep seeing my friends post baby photos. Worst thing is, abt 4 of my good friends due 2nd half of this yr... I was originally to be with them. Now i think I go their baby shower will cry, thinking of the lost one.... Haiz...

Same here. I have 4 close friends all due starting from June to Nov onwards. I have to attend all the baby showers. Keep having thoughts that I could be also one of them but I am not fated to be part of that group. *sour sour* feeling. For me, I think I feel better being direct with people if they ask how come we have no kids. Usually that will shut their mouths up.

M/C is common but I dun think there is enough support after M/C. For example, what to eat after m/c, how to recover from m/c, or what supplements is good after m/c etc. I am so clueless until I read this forum.

Ladies, let's jia you! Work hard and be positive. We will get what we want soon!

 

[mangohope]

Ya actually when I talk to others abt their MC then I don't feel so bad. At first I felt I was really the odd (and unlucky) one out.

Ya mangohope ur friend's mother very productive eh.... Ya best long fong I close shop liao... This baby making thing is so tiring.
Groupchat just mute lor. I hardly go facebook nowadays also... Keep seeing my friends post baby photos. Worst thing is, abt 4 of my good friends due 2nd half of this yr... I was originally to be with them. Now i think I go their baby shower will cry, thinking of the lost one.... Haiz...

I hope to find out my prob soon hais if not ask me to try again I also scare happen again. So stressful. My friend around me and even my new neighbors all with kids so constantly asking me when I'm planning to have one. Cos married 3 years le, so people will stand gossiping why no kids that kind of feeling

 

[mangohope]

LOL, I thought so too. Though we may be a bit compare to our friends of same age, but if can have twins, then we can make it up. One friend of mine was married in early 20s, but no kids all along. Till this year she had a twin after 10 years marriage. Then we knew they also have problem in ttc, she got her rainbow twins through ivf. Most friends of same age all have at least 2 kids now. Have to jiayou lo!

I don't know how to jiayou can conceive but cannot keep the baby safe for 40 weeks

 

[dolly_gal]

Sok koon, if u not comfy to attend their bb shower just let them know if they do know ur mc lah. I aso tell my colleague tat i m not ready to attend his twin bb shower last year n fyi his was aso thru ivf n first attempt strike 2. I did tell him i scared i will break down so pardon me not attending but still bot gifts for his kids.

 

[princessleopard]

I don't know how to jiayou can conceive but cannot keep the baby safe for 40 weeks

Must have faith! We will hod our baby in our arms one day!

 

[Chew Sok Koon]

Yah, understand. I will try to push away most. But some cannot, for example my best friend is giving birth in August. As much as I want to be happy for her, a part of me still feels very "sour" and sad for myself. She knows about my m/c. However, she also cannot hide from her own excitement of having a bb soon as well. So sometimes, it is difficult to push away also. So must find a way to face it no matter how much I try to avoid.

Mangohope, I understand. We will always have this doubt (whether will we have our own babies eventually). We will always have this low moments and doubts. Try to think on the positive side. At least we know we do not have fertility problem. It just that we need to find out what is the reason and find a solution behind it. And hoping that the next one will be healthy babies.

 

[haze02]

I don't know how to jiayou can conceive but cannot keep the baby safe for 40 weeks

Mango hope,
I'm also scare of TTC and get pregnant again.. Same as u, I can concieve but couldn't hold my baby... Meantime doc still couldn't give me any answer, even having tons of blood tests done at nuh... Meantime just tiao ur body back to prefect shape and dun think abt TTC.. We need prepare ourselves mentally and physical.. I'm putting everything a rest and focus on my body... Jiayou dear! I'm sure one day we will able carry our baby as long we dun give up hope..

 

[mangohope]

Princessleopard, Sok Koon and Haze

Thank you for all the encouragements! I still believe and have faith that the day will come but still just having the fear keeps on lingering in my heart. I feel like adopting, during my 2nd mc I saw someone posting about giving her unborn baby away I was so tempted to email her, but den again didn't do it. Think I watch too much drama scare the woman will wanna take back the child or regret giving away
In western country they have surrogate mother, but again I also feel weird like a stranger carrying my child. :/

 

[hi_mei]

Mangohope, don't lose hope. It must be v sad for u to go thru 2 MC. Just have to try again when u are ready.

Just to share with everyone, I am gg to try intralipids drip for my next ttc because I think my body not very friendly to implantation of the embryo. The purpose of this drip is to make ur body more conducive to implantation and retaining the pregnancy if u have immune issues. For this pregnancy, I had v bad fever during the tww even though no one around me was sick. The worst thing is that it started immediately upon feeling implantation. So it is not a very good sign. In the end, the baby was developing slowly, heartbeat later stopped. Anyway just to share with all of u, in case u wanted to consider it, and I will update on whether it is successive or not.

 

[Chew Sok Koon]

hi_mei, how is this intralipids drip being done? Did your gynea did any tests and recommended you to do this because of the test results? I am asking this because my gynea did mention something to me along the line but was not specific.

 

[hi_mei]

hi_mei, how is this intralipids drip being done? Did your gynea did any tests and recommended you to do this because of the test results? I am asking this because my gynea did mention something to me along the line but was not specific.

I heard from a forum sister. She did iui and ivf previously. Then with intralipids she bfp with twins! My gynae didnt say anything abt it. I am not doing any test... Heard the intra lipids qt cheap, only $230. I am sure the test is gonna be more expensive so not going to bother.

 

[mangohope]

Mangohope, don't lose hope. It must be v sad for u to go thru 2 MC. Just have to try again when u are ready.

Just to share with everyone, I am gg to try intralipids drip for my next ttc because I think my body not very friendly to implantation of the embryo. The purpose of this drip is to make ur body more conducive to implantation and retaining the pregnancy if u have immune issues. For this pregnancy, I had v bad fever during the tww even though no one around me was sick. The worst thing is that it started immediately upon feeling implantation. So it is not a very good sign. In the end, the baby was developing slowly, heartbeat later stopped. Anyway just to share with all of u, in case u wanted to consider it, and I will update on whether it is successive or not.

Sadly I had 3 shortly after the 2nd one I got preg again.

Try out and let us know the result

 

[haze02]

Princessleopard, Sok Koon and Haze

Thank you for all the encouragements! I still believe and have faith that the day will come but still just having the fear keeps on lingering in my heart. I feel like adopting, during my 2nd mc I saw someone posting about giving her unborn baby away I was so tempted to email her, but den again didn't do it. Think I watch too much drama scare the woman will wanna take back the child or regret giving away
In western country they have surrogate mother, but again I also feel weird like a stranger carrying my child. :/

I'm a selfish person, duno if I able to love tat adopted baby as mine own flesh... Maybe I will reject tat baby, so adoption is a No for me.. As play safe for that poor baby too.. Actually if there is a surrogate in singapore, I will be the first go thru it... Seriously I dun mind at all, at least I know the egg is mine... Hehe!!

Dun give up hope my dear... It my 3rd MC, Dr Sheila and Prof Mahesh very sure tat this baby is just abnormal, there nothing we can do to save this baby and our body is prefect.. So I'm sure there nothing wrong with me. I will give my body rest and leave TTC a rest too... As what I say focus on getting ur best shape for the next round... I'm sure we will able hold our rainbow too... Jiayou jiayou!