Support group - Miscarriages

ppcc, no lah whisper wings ultra for afternoon.
Yesteday night it start suddenly mah, so I felt it it soaked my nightsafe till my sleeping clothes.
Ya lor Lynn: my toilet bowl water turn red. Ya lor, this afternoon I changing every 2hours...hmmm okay if tonight still wake up to change nightsafe I will call gynae... It is getting tiring. Thanks for all your concerns girls...wa wa...
 


eh ppcc, you spotting alll 3 weeks no break in between after your DnC??? I had a short break of no spotting for 2-3 days only(seem like just stop for gynae), all spotting.

hahaha I think today my colleagues must be thinking why I keep going toilet. Last time I sit at my desk don't move one.

Lynn, you ask for meds to reduce bleeding hor, I never thought of that ler...haha stupid me...
 
JTML: lols. i didn't ask. i just told her about the amount i was bleeding and how tired i was after that. she auto give me. ^^ now still have. I take the moment i see red, so far so good. not so heavy bleeding when on the medicine.
 
Hi Girls...

Lynn, you got to try the BBT to understand your cycle better. Once you see the temp soar it would mean you ovulate. I seen some ppl on the forum say some try immediately and maybe can get ah boy. I am not very sure about the truth of it though. Doesnt matter you cover blanket or not. As long as you didnt have too much movement that is fine.

ppcc, I subclincial hypothyroid. Diagnose in Jan this year. My mum super keen eye think my neck fatter so insist I check my blood which I do annually. She was accurate, realize one of my reading went bonkers. However because mine was not too bad I am taking the minimum level of thyroxine and my reading is perfect since then and I went to TTC only after doc say go ahead in May 09 so I went to my gynae and she suggest BBT taking and strike the next cycle. Even after I strike, I immediately did monthly check up with my endo doc at SGH (after stabilize is once every 6 months) and he was monitoring it so closely but unfortunately I lost it... I am going back to him next week and I dont know what to tell him *sigh* He must be disappointed. According to my endo doc, low bbt in the range of 35.XX are one of the sign of hypothyroid hence if you seen some charts of BBT they dont even have temp at region of 35 celcius. Even for my pregnancy, the gynae rule out my thyroid as an issue because all my blood works last 3 months was normal.

JTML, at least you become normal ald... =D it be over soon enough.. I am mentally preparing myself for the blood after they skip us the last few months.. arrggh

Me too still spotting here and there leh.. at least now know you girls accoy me! heh One question though, the medicine to lessen the flow.. is it better not to take them since the less intervention the better right?


Girls, I went to the TCM today. The doctor tried to feel my pulse and think I am still emotionally sore. Who wouldnt! Anyway when talk about the babies I almost teared, cannot help it and I hate it. No matter how I tried to distract myself I cannot forget the epsiode! When I just got pregnant, I kept telling my hubby dont get too attached because a lot of things happen in 1st trimester. Thought I was throughly prepared if I loss them I still wasnt prepared afterall =(. Worse part was when doc tell me they share a placenta and sac I was telling them to grow a membrane between them and share their blood supply every night before I sleep. Simply painful.. now I look at the ultrasound scan I can feel the ache which I loath. Why did I get attached to something I never even hold or seen before! Duh....

Anyway at the TCM the doc didnt detect anything unusal with me and couldnt even tell my thyroid issue until I told her. She say to focus on bu regime the next 3 months to prepare. Improve blood circulation and strengthen me. She didnt say I got a weak womb or otherwise which I hope is good news! Starting her medicine right now. I can hardly wait to TTC to put everything behind.

Wah super long post..miss you gals! =D
 
Lynn:
your Gynae automatic... You still have the meds you mean. make sure not expired eh. I glad TCM helps. When young, I had heavy periods, I rememebr I was so embarressed. After that, I went on Bai Feng Wan, I was able to regular my periods.
Now I confirm I will try after 2-3 periods like Shann Yheng lah. I think makes a bit of sense. Initially I unwilling to wait...Now with this kind of flow...hehhe wait better...

ppcc, your link very information hor... Actually I use the AF and the CM to estimate. BBT is actually very very very useful if disciplined ppl to chart like ling, haha...which I really hope to have such quality but I am totally hopeless. haha my hubby even want me to make breakfast for him, he has to work to make me wake up... so we went for CM, OPKs, and AF. Actually I aim BBT method first ler but I fall short.

ehm tomorrow is joanne check up, I really hope good results come up, hope she feeling better.
 
JTML... you are so wrong! I am the most ill disciplined when it come doing face cleaning regime, drinking waist tonic. Try BBT lah... I really didnt believe but my gynae gave me instructions, some charts and a file to track and I went okay lah I will do it. When I strike, I show the gynae the chart, she immediately can tell I late ovulate that month and no need to guess the embryo growth. Hopefully the next TTC cycle is as short as my last one! =)
 
Hi Ling,

Tks for the explanation... I need to go dig my charts but i recall sometimes i have like 35.7 or 35.8 degrees... apart from the thicker neck, got other symptoms? And errm.. can i just go to the GP for a blood test?

Abt spotting.. it sorta of stopped for few days last week, then these few days come back again.. yesterday was more than just a few spots somemore..

Ling... understand how u feel... sometimes i feel schizo.. i will be chatting and joking with people but heart is still aching badly inside.. and when i read all those horrible things that can happen in first trim, i also told my hubby not to be too excited though he was bouncing up and down with excitement after seeing the sac and heartbeat... I've packed all the stuff related to the baby in a nice basket.. including the +ve HPT tests and ultrasounds and even the oscar pamphlet!.. sigh... tot but will still go and see the ultrasound once in a while... sigh...
 
Ling: har neck fatter also can tell? 0.o I've put on quite abit of weight with all the tonics and TCM. bleah. need to shed them off.
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JTML: yah better wait 2-3cycles. eh. haven't expire. the expiry date is like 3yrs. written on the packet :D i'm on second packet already.

I tore up all the u/s scans. =X I think i'll only keep the one that really did work out.
 
hi ling:
ya wah I hear already I feel very gian...heeheee immediately doc very sure can say you late O.power...

I must get past the AF part...part about medicine to reduce bleeding, that why I give it 1 more night, if still like this, I scared I too tired to go to work. Today is walk up and down to toilet hahhahah...not working...cannot lah I buah tahan 1 more day like tat.

aiya, dun DUH yourself ler, understandable lah. I also feel a bit sad. We were so sad coming here to share sorrows, some had more some had less, but yet somewhat, still something in common.

ppcc, how long ago was your temps??
 
ppcc, thyroid blood test can test at polyclinic, much cheaper... trust me! Is actually for tsh, t4 etc etc.. For me I started to put on weight over 6 months which I cannot shed. Which was unusual because my metobolism rate is super high and despite all my games and exercise it refuse to burn. My neck got thicker, suspect thyroid gland OD and grew bigger.

Lynn, my mum super keen eyes..which I am thankful because my endo doc said mine is sub clincal and lucky spot early so not much damage.

I dont want to throw the scans away.. that is my last bit memory of the twins. Its ironic. I want to forget it but refuse to let go. It is like a cancer patient when they have their bad days.. these couple of days are my worse days. I dont know whether we will eventually become mummies because it seems so easy to just loss them =(
 
JTML - Actually i only got 1.5mths worth of temp charts... i started mid-way thru my cycle in May, then in June was the first full cycle and i strike that cycle.. tat cycle i was like super kiasu.. do TCM, chart BBT, use OPK and check discharge... ma chiam military operation... won the battle but lost the war unfortunately...
 
Ling -- hugz.... hope the bad days will pass soon... i also dunno how to find a balance between letting go and keeping the memory of my baby... just have to keep faith... my hubby says must not focus on what we lost but cherish what we have... so guess really hv to force ourselves to look forward!!
 
Ling: jialat. so many tests need to take
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I have this crazy idea to check if everything else is okay. but sure cost a bomb.
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JTML: situation different i guess.
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and i know i sure cannot take it if i keep the scans around. LOL. I still remember being angry at the foetus for refusing to stick with me
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but of course over time came to understand that it's something really beyond mine and its control. :D
 
Abt the BBT try to start recording from cycle day 1 onwards.. more gradual and you get the hang of it. Also any BD session to record it down. Think now is the perfect time to find our cycle since everything is expected to go haywire.

I am just glad at least there is an outlet here to talk to you guys because we are not sharing with friends and it cheers me up to talk to you girls. Ok.. we jia you! LOOK FORWARD!!!
 
Lynn, I traverse from contemplating tearing my scans and then I scrapbook them.... I scrapbook all preganncies from now on...Pass or Fail. If I change my mind I tear my scrapbook lor.

Ling, if you try you may get, don't mark yourself failing grade first.

ppcc, quite recent... means you can go check blood test ler. no no no lost one war lost only, next war have not start yet... eh means your strategy works. Bingo! Can redo all of it till the Bingo part.

My hubby say I machiam plan until like project at work like that. My handphone calendar all mark swee swee. even mark BDing days, so my handphone cannot be lost...
 
JTML, You all gear to TTC ald!! =D I am also thinking if we fast fast sucess than we dont dwell on our losses too much otherwise now is like a bit of hint of a pregger women or ppl with babies I get a little emo! arrghhh

Lynn,

Why you dont take your BBt first see if it is unusua
lly high or low than decide to take thyroid test. The thing abt thyroid is that many atimes it goes undiagnosis and end up the person become extermely thin or fat due to hyperthyroid or hypothyroid respectively and have problem tryin to control it.
 
JTML - yes.. seemed like my strategy worked hor.. but i now still abit scarred so let nature take its course for the time being.. also, i'm sorta convinced that i was forcing things back then.. cos the TCM used accupuncture to help me ovulate after the oral medicine didn't help, so maybe the egg that was forced out wasn't good?? but anyway, i think charting BBT is quite a good practice cos it helps us keep tabs on our system even if we not TTC-ing... skarly if there's ever a day when we have a brood of kids and decide to close factory, can also use it to know when are the safer days to BD... sigh... what bliss it wld be to be in that sort of situation!

I dun think i can bear to throw away my ultrasound too... especially the last one... think can see abit of baby's eyes, nose and mouth liao... Lynn.. yes.. sometimes i also find myself asking my baby why he dun stick around with me and chose to leave..
 
Thk u jtml for ur wishes and remembering it.. Frankly speaking, i hv forbe going to the clinic later... Very stress and scare.. Dun feel like going.. Sigh..how r u today? Still bleed alot? Better take care and see ur gynea if cant take it..
 
ppcc, I read a lot of girls on clomid but get very successful pregnancies so I think some of us just need some help while some dont. Dont stress so much lah. Try the natural way first lah.. use BBT =D Wah I become like advocate for BBT. Very sure my gynae very proud of me. LOL!

Anyway now we havent TTC is a good time to start tracking from CD1 onwards. Than can use for reference. I notice these couple of days my temp go up ald.. My blood is coming... arrggh and I calculate it is going to fall around my duty travel =S Just hope it dont stain everything I touch otherwise it will be so embarassing since everyone is male during the meeting! *worried*

I am sorry for stirring everyone's emotion last night.. just a little upset suddenly. Today is a brighter day afterall =)

Jo.. Jia you.. baby could be jumping ard when you scan than we can demote you out of the thread! If it is not meant to be than we also will be here to support you.
 
Hey gals

Whats the full name for the auto immune test, ANA? Can request through polyclinics or GP mah?

Hypothyroid tests can request through polyclinics or GP also mah?
 
Hi gals
sad to say that my bb heartbeat had stopped..;'( now had plan to go to kkh to do my dnc next wed.. But dun know how to tell my boss?? I dun wish to tell anyone abt my miscarriage.. Can anyone who did ur dnc advise me will the hospital leave slip wrote the cause of this leave or wun write anything except our name on it? As i worry here i lie but the slip chuan bang me.. I need ur advise soon..;'( thk u..

Any gd recommendation on any confinement caterer? As i heard newbaby caterer food got hair in it.. Sigh.. Not sure who to take now? Thk u so much for ur support..
 
oh dear Joanne.. Dunno what else to say except that we can all fully empathise with how you feel now... Take care and if u need an outlet, can join us here okie? I'm not sure about the confinement caterer but for the hospitalisation leave, mine was from my doctor's clinic and it just stated that i was unfit for work... no mention of the cause... As for the boss, maybe u say u hv a female ailment that requires surgery? Take care and hope u recover soon from your D&C..
 
Jo... Sorry abt your loss =( I don't know what to say because we know only too well nothing we say going to lessen your pain. For MY hospital leave, they didn't state any reason. So far I have managed to keep my mc well away from work so don't over worry. D and c not only for mc but to clear uterus for some due to female ailments. I can't help on confinement food because my mum cooked for me the entire 2 weeks. Everything will be better soon just not now....
 
sunflower seed, I done the tests at gynae for viral and auto immune. For thyroid can do at GP or polyclinic.
 
Hi ppcc and ling
thk u for ur reply.. May i know ur hl is fr which hospital? Hope kk wun state too..

Hi ling
how u explain to ur collegues if they asks? I more concern is some female collegue will asks wht happen and yet dun know how to answer them wht women problem.. How? Sigh.. Thk u for u gals support else i really will go crazy..
 
hi jo, I told them my menses lining didn't breakdown and up clot left in uterus. Is a common thingy because I got a few friends with this issue. Don't have to go into details ...
 
Ling: viral is what test? I think i'll take the auto immune when we decided to try again. just to be sure.
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as for thyroid, shall chart and see how is it. CD1 means first day of menses?
 
Hi ling
thk u so much.. If got this illness, is it remove thru dnc method too or operate thru stomach? As want to know how to answer their curiosity.. Sigh..
 
Hi Lynn, the viral test was to test if I had infections that infected the babies. I think you have to test it when you do the d and c.

Ya CD 1 is cycle day 1. Anyway dont over paranoid. I think sometimes you go overdrive and just comes up with the worse scenario when it is not.

Jo, D and C/E is used to clear the uterus whether is a clot or a miscarriage. I think you are going into too much details which is the last thing you need to be bother with right now. Just tell them is to clear some clots done through D and C is fine. Anyway it is your life not theirs if you are not comfortable to share with them just tell them that. The more you want to satisfy their curioisity the more you feel unsure and stress. Dont .. because you dont owe anyone any explanation.

My HL is from ESH and it doesnt state the cause for mc..
 
hi,
my baby detected no heartbeat last week, it is abt 8wks. doc told me either go for D&C or let it out naturally. is there anyone let it out naturally?can share the experience?
 
Mandyn, sorry to hear about the lost.
my baby had no heartbeat too at week 7. Dr did not advise on letting out naturally. I did not even know we can have this. Dr told me to go for D&C. I opted for it to be done a week later. Is this your first check up?
My week 6 check showed everything was ok. Week 7 was when no heartbeat was detected.
I got pg thru IVF.
 
Thanks Ling, can the viral and auto immune tests be done anytime or must be on certain days of a cycle? Thyroid test also anytime of cycle?
 
Hi mandyn
am also going for my dnc next wk.. Urs eight wk is quite big.. Mine only sixth wk.. Gynea say can natural but will experience bad clamp and may not thoroughly clear inside.. Also may take few wks for it to come naturally.. So i go ahead with dnc as i dun wish to go thru lots of bleeding and clamp but end up not clear and still hv to do dnc.. Like that double suffer.. Moreover after dnc, u dun bleed alot.. And we can quickly wait for the next af to come so that we can ttc again.. Take care.. Is this ur first pregnancy?

Hi ling
i see.. Thks so much for ur explanation.. Understand better now.. Shall use ur excuse next tuesday..thk u..
 
Ling: something like that i didn't expect to get the chromosome abnormality thingy when the foetus results came back with it. and we got tested that i was the carrier.
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I think thyorid and auto immune isn't as bad as abnormality.
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at least you can control it for thyorid and auto immune?
 
Joanne, mandyne,

*huggggs*

Su yana,

I have a staff going for IVF next month. She is already on injections and stuff. She is 39+ and under a lot of pressure from her in-laws after having married for 4yrs. I'm frankly quite worried for her. She told me her gynae said success rate is 35-40% due to age. It's one thing about getting a +HPT and having a sticky baby. *sigh* I don't know what I should tell her to get her mentally prepared that things don't always work out even after a +HPT. Anyway, she didn't know what I just went through.

Joanne,

I've seen many hospitalisation leave slips before. They will not mention the ailment. The procedure may be mentioned in the hospital bill. So if you are claiming from your company, they may then see what procedure you went for. For me, I did my D&C in the gynae's clinic (not hospital). The MC does not state the ailment. The clinic receipt only states "1 procedure" and did not specify what procedure. I only informed my boss that I need to go for day surgery. Boss and colleague did not kpo and probe. If they did, I'd just brush it off and tell them, "Aiyah, women's ailment lah" and usually they will shaddup. No need to go into specifics.
 
Went for a trip to Penang last week. It was planned since June. If I was still preg, I'd hv crossed the 14th week/1st tri, which is a good time to travel. Alas, it was not meant to be...

Ling, I also read that BD on O-date and later will likely result in boy. BD 2+ days or more before O-date will result in girl. You ladies can try and tell me if it works. :D

My SIL is prolly into her 11th week now. Seems like a sticky baby. Dunno if the in-laws are thinking what's wrong with me... Weak constitution? Bad genes? Especially since this is the 2nd M/C liao. If I ever get preg again, I think I don't wanna tell them until I cross 1st tri! Just in case I 3X suay, then I don't need to go and account/explain to anyone!

Bleah....
 
Optimus Prime: I agree don't tell anyone till cross 3 months.
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but with no one knowing have its pros and cons. like my friends pregnant about the same time. keeps gng on about their pregnanices etc. yada yada.
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Hi Optimus Prime,
Thank you so much for your detail explanation. Will do about this... I do agree with what you say about MIL... my SIL is also pregnant and suppose same delivery month as me (think will be upset everytime see her bigger and bigger tummy)..And my MIL got 8 children so very soon, she annouce to everyone that me and my SIL is pregnant the moment I detect my bb heartbeat at six week.. now she has to go explain to all about the not successful pregnancy for mine... i will feel so miserable when see them next time.. Yes, Even my hubby also say next time dun tell her until after 3months... this is also my 2nd m/c... did you do any test after your dnc?
I will be doing at KK and hope will be cheaper..
Now am sourcing for confinement food...sigh...

Hi Gals,
Let's look ahead and dun be too upset anymore... since we need a healthy body to hv a healthy baby, we must build up our body strong during this time...Am planning to go to TCM to tiao my body strong strong... hope I can conceive soon by end of this year...of course with a healthy pregnancy and baby throughout nine months too.. frankly speaking, with a 2nd mc... think my 3rd pregnancy will be a more stressful one though know that stress is no good but say is easy then do... sigh...
 
yess... the whole world seems to be pregnant except us! sigh.. yesterday had some time off so went for my first shopping trip in mths... Was holding off buying new clothes for some time since i tot they won't fit for long as I expanded =( tot the retail therapy might help but in the end made me more sian... suddenly there seem to be nice baby doll and empire-cut tops everywhere that would be just nice for pregnant women... sigh... i was so looking forward to hv a huge belly...
 
Hi Gals,
Like to check with any of you got do any massage at home after Dnc? Is it necessary? Is it better to have? If yes, any lobang for good massage lady?
 
hi Ppcc,
Dun worry... i know how u feel.. me too hv the urge to hv a big belly... sigh.. at least you can try very soon... me still need to wait for my next week apptment to do dnc... so still long way for me to go before i can try... sadz...
 
Hi Mandyn... sorry to hear abt your loss... i think most of us here went for D&C. read somewhere that doctors usually recommend this as it ensures that all the tissue is removed from the uterus and therefore avoid infection... but some prefer natural miscarriage as it's less invasive..

Joanne... take care and have a good rest after your procedure! Dun worry abt having to explain to ur colleagues okie... it's really none of their business! Don't worry.. u will be able to try again soon too!!
 
Hey dear all! My AF is here!!! Started yesterday (Friday morning), didn't expect it to come so fast, it is the 27th day after my washing. And yea JTML, my flow is definitely heavier than b4, can feel the blood just gushed out like tap water. I am thankful to Laurier sanitary pad now, i thought it leaked out, and it didn't phew!! now am using the Laurier Night Safe all the time. Am in KL for a short trip, zhun zhun AF came yesterday, alamak!
 
Hi Shann,

Wah... your period come so fast... that's great and happy for you too... as you are one step closer to TTC... envious envious... oh... hate to hv period when overseas too... do take care...
Think i must go buy Laurier Night Safe too... hope my period will report fast fast soon too.. but first, i hv to go thru DNC first...;-( still long way to go...

Thank you PPCC...
 
Hi Girls...

Wah so many posts!

Mandyn, Sorry about your loss. Take heed everyone of us here totally understand what you are going through. The thing about let it flow naturally in my opinion is up to you. However if the fetus is too big I read a lot of complication could happen. D and C although invasive I thought it give me a closure. After I woke up I would know no more fetus we move on although I admit the move on part takes a little longer ...

sunflower seed, I took the viral etc during D and C .. thyroid is something I took during my regular body check up my company conducts.

Optimus, That's what I heard as well but boys or girls I just want a sticky baby that would stick to us =) Anyway we cant help it if we mc also.. ai yah all these in laws I really dont know what is their real intention! For me my hubby didnt tell his folks and we agree because fear the unknown. His folks are not the best in laws and I can imagine the shit they would give me if they find out esp losing 2 at one time. double whammy! I guess the hubby knows and thus decide we will tell everyone when we pass 3months. As it is his folks have been asking my mum and dad why I dont want a baby since New Year. DUH! Who knows this lousy mum couldnt continue the preganacy otherwise on Monday is my 15th week =( Hope the Penang trip make the pain a little lesser.

ppcc, dont say okay or you can buy the nice clothes to prepare first =)).. I have not shop at all since the incidence as well. Cannot bring myself to shop because fear pregnant women and see newborn... see ald the heart always ache! Dont know when this will cease.

Shann, That was fast! I am looking forward to mine and I also realized it will happen during my duty travel after counting my BBT days.. Ai yoh.. Last thing I need is to keep running to the loo during the flight! If it leaks I am dead because everyone is male in the meeting and they will wonder why this woman always so troublesome.. arrgghh. No one will understand! I just went to stock up my supplies this morning after hearing JTML epsiode =)

Jo, Glad you are looking forward!
 
Hi gals
can u advise is it very painful after dnc? Any bad clamp? Will viginal be painful and swollen? How long after ur dnc then can do bd? As start to worry abt wednesday procedure le.. Thk u..
 


Jo,

No pain.. just a little cramp thats all because the uterus is contracting. Vaginal is not going to be affected.. can urine and poo as normal.. totally unlike real childbirth I reckon.

Dont overstress.. I think you think too much hence a lot of concern. Many of us went through it in a daze and came out perfectly alright so dont worry. =)It will be over after a deep sleep.. Relax and take it as a short break from work...
 

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