Pixie ...it's package! U hv $ ...I dun ... I will dig through all avenues to get free legal aid ...u dun hv kids to feed...I hv 2 sch going kids to support ...u hv a job...am going out of job due to my case ...u hv savings... Am a bankcrupt cos. Of this bastard . . I suffered 25yr silent for my kids ...hv u ?
In a dilemma!!! Divorce, Flat,Custody & Maintenance - Need advice
- Thread starter jokergerl
- Start date
Tell everyone here lawyers r cheap ... I tell u I hv a niece n nephew lawyer ...nope they aren't cheap ... my bf is a ex DPP ...he says they charge everything ...just that it's nicely package n for ur info ...they will drag n ask court to extend hearing just to charge more...think I lie? I just had a hearing this morning ... That lawyer was supposed to file their defense weeks ago but told the court he needs MORE time
So today's hearing ..is free? No ...it will b charged ...cm apr ..the nxt mention will b free...nope it will be charge also. .$100-$500 ? If there's a lawyer charging representatio at this rate, let me know...I can use in ad hoc...
So today's hearing ..is free? No ...it will b charged ...cm apr ..the nxt mention will b free...nope it will be charge also. .$100-$500 ? If there's a lawyer charging representatio at this rate, let me know...I can use in ad hoc...
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pixie ng
Well-Known Member
i never say lawyer is cheap. but i always say find a good lawyer. cheap lawyer doesnt mean is good... and you want things to go fast and smooth, lawyer is the answer.
i not sure why your niece n nephew law firm so weird... and will drag n ask court to extend hearing just to charge more.. it is very not professional. if i were you, i will definitely bao tong them...
for my lawyer, she is quite well known in the divorce field, she also help women via AWARE too. she told me 6months can settle everything and cost me $3K in total. and she did it. there is additional charge for my hdb letter because the law firm sent to hdb, but hdb say never received. so she re-send it again which cost about $100 more.. and that's about it.. my ex shares my lawyer too, so end up he paid 1.5K and i paid 1.5K
i guess you just meet the worst person in their professional...
And yes you are right. I have money but no time. I do not have time to research and find the best and fastest way to divorce. I do not have time to go to courts by myself. I do not have time to do all the documents for the divorce. I do not want to jeopardize my job and my lifestyle for a failed marriage. If paying 3K can get rid of this failed marriage, 3K is definitely worth it. I'm not advertising for my lawyer, I do not get referral fees. But I do recommend her service because she is good in her trade with reasonable pricing. Some people has engaged her and check back with me regarding the timeline and charges, so far is the same as mine. So for these few years, her charges is still the same.
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So what are her changes? Is it $3k? Contested or uncontested? How much per representation ?
Ur case is uncontested n $3k is market rate.
Weird? U think every lawyer lay professionally? I sat at the waiting area just to hear the lawyers discussions n gossips...hv u done it before ?
U too naive ...u can go family court website n I can give u my court case no n u can see how many times they have extend... U think my case is only like that ... I can tell u a few more mums who had their case drag n drag ...u too fortunate cos u can afford to pay ur way through... I can't..am bankrupt
If any of u mums hv $ .. By all means, splash .get a lawyer n hv it easy n sit it out..donate to the lawyers ... I dun hv that kind of luxury .. I must win my case by all means.
Ur case is uncontested n $3k is market rate.
Weird? U think every lawyer lay professionally? I sat at the waiting area just to hear the lawyers discussions n gossips...hv u done it before ?
U too naive ...u can go family court website n I can give u my court case no n u can see how many times they have extend... U think my case is only like that ... I can tell u a few more mums who had their case drag n drag ...u too fortunate cos u can afford to pay ur way through... I can't..am bankrupt
If any of u mums hv $ .. By all means, splash .get a lawyer n hv it easy n sit it out..donate to the lawyers ... I dun hv that kind of luxury .. I must win my case by all means.
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pixie ng
Well-Known Member
is not every lawyer is professional.. some of them will not be...that's why i only hire good ones... and that's why i only recommend good ones...
i do have another good one to recommend who is hired by my friend, but she is slightly more expensive. which is why i only recommend the one i used...
so far those i know never get their case drag, the lawyers do meet the timeline and get the things done. and this is what we paying for. you just need to hire the right person for the right job.
I do hope that you able to get divorce to your own terms eventually though.
U r wrong ...I'm not going to get the divorce on my terms ... Nobody will achieve that.. U hv a hse , I dun even hv a hse to go back, so why can't I hv my right to the house I had been upkeeping ? n hv the hse to my gals n me? Why must I go uncontested n let him take it? U dun hv kids to feed, daily I hv to provide, so why I hv to relinquish my rights of woman's charter that he hv to maintain me n my kids n suffer all alone ?
I stand to fight for my kids future n mine own future. Unlike u... I am almost bankrupt cos of him...n should i just forget about it n go uncontested? I can't even own a credit card now cos of him .n should not i be angry n let the divorce go uncontested while he buys groceries for that bitch n her whole village?
U think every professional lawyer is straight? I hv been to court so many times listening to the lawyers to lawyers exchange ...have u?
Timelines are set by the court not by lawyers ..de and if the divorce is uncontested then its simple n fast that you even dun need to go to court n can be settle within weeks ..who doesn't know this ..
With the help from the court frens and law society n my niece n nephew , I know the direction of my divorce will be. N how to win it in my favour.
U r lucky to hv a silver spoon n u hv $ but not everyone is like u n not everyone body shoes size is the same. Everyone's needs n experiences n wants are different.
There's no such thing as "one size fits all!!" If you r giving advice...be it legal n factual..pls be accurate...n not some biased opinionated self righteous.. Skewered point.
I stand to fight for my kids future n mine own future. Unlike u... I am almost bankrupt cos of him...n should i just forget about it n go uncontested? I can't even own a credit card now cos of him .n should not i be angry n let the divorce go uncontested while he buys groceries for that bitch n her whole village?
U think every professional lawyer is straight? I hv been to court so many times listening to the lawyers to lawyers exchange ...have u?
Timelines are set by the court not by lawyers ..de and if the divorce is uncontested then its simple n fast that you even dun need to go to court n can be settle within weeks ..who doesn't know this ..
With the help from the court frens and law society n my niece n nephew , I know the direction of my divorce will be. N how to win it in my favour.
U r lucky to hv a silver spoon n u hv $ but not everyone is like u n not everyone body shoes size is the same. Everyone's needs n experiences n wants are different.
There's no such thing as "one size fits all!!" If you r giving advice...be it legal n factual..pls be accurate...n not some biased opinionated self righteous.. Skewered point.
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pixie ng
Well-Known Member
Actually I do not have a silver spoon, my own house and my own job is earn by my own capability. I know how to deal with my own failure logically instead of being emotional and revengeful. Actually my advice is all legal and factual because I did get divorced as per my own term with my own lawyer. I guess you should not advise biased on opinionated self righteous or some skewered point. What you didn't have or achieved, doesn't mean people out there cannot have or achieved. And what they have which you don't, just seemly means they are lucky to you, it can be their hardwork you know.
I didn't say professional lawyer is straight.. Like what you said your niece and nephew ain't because they will lengthen the court time just to earn more money, hence is not professional and straight. That's why I say you need to hire the right person for the right job. I do not need to listen lawyer to lawyer exchange because I don't really care how they get my things done, I only care that they get my things done at my deadline.
Anyway I don't think you understand what I'm talking because you say that you are not going to get the divorce on your term & nobody will achieve that.. That's weird because you saying you going to win it in your favour. That's kinda contradicting.. Anyway, all I can say is since your niece and nephew are lawyers, you need not hire any lawyers, they can represent you I guess....
my views is for everything there is a cost, we cant expect people to help us for free.
If anyone can afford, its better to get a lawyer as they are specialized in that area. Not everything we know of the court proceedings, and the court will not tolerate any delay or mistakes.
Also its better to clear the divorce fast, as its tiring and stressful. Very important is, a failed marriage wasted part of life, we should quickly settle it and move on, no use to keep on fighting unnecessary. Get what you deserve or is yours and move on. His money let him have it, retribution will come is he do wrong. let
If anyone can afford, its better to get a lawyer as they are specialized in that area. Not everything we know of the court proceedings, and the court will not tolerate any delay or mistakes.
Also its better to clear the divorce fast, as its tiring and stressful. Very important is, a failed marriage wasted part of life, we should quickly settle it and move on, no use to keep on fighting unnecessary. Get what you deserve or is yours and move on. His money let him have it, retribution will come is he do wrong. let
yes, i did think of doing the divorce myself. To save cost.
But i think back, i would spend a lot of time putting up statement and going to court. it will affect my job. I know life have to go on after a divorce, if i lose my job, over a divorce, and my ex unable to give me enough maintenance, my life would be worse off.
I didn't get the divorce based on my terms, but it was satisfactory. I got my own shares, and the divorce went smooth, as i let it to the lawyer to negotiate, i didn't have to take leave to attend the court processing.
There is no winner or loser in a divorce. The court will not say u win, u get the flat, or u lose u get nothing. What is your, will be yours. Better to move forward, and leave a failed marriage behind.
Note: i able to claim back part of the money i spend on the lawyer from my ex.
But i think back, i would spend a lot of time putting up statement and going to court. it will affect my job. I know life have to go on after a divorce, if i lose my job, over a divorce, and my ex unable to give me enough maintenance, my life would be worse off.
I didn't get the divorce based on my terms, but it was satisfactory. I got my own shares, and the divorce went smooth, as i let it to the lawyer to negotiate, i didn't have to take leave to attend the court processing.
There is no winner or loser in a divorce. The court will not say u win, u get the flat, or u lose u get nothing. What is your, will be yours. Better to move forward, and leave a failed marriage behind.
Note: i able to claim back part of the money i spend on the lawyer from my ex.
i agree with margret.
I did use a lawyer. I don't think i was able to do what the lawyer had done. There are many terms which I don't understand, and if really going to do myself, i definitely will need more time and energy, as if divorce is not stressful enough, i would have breakdown.
Anyway, my ex, didn't wan to let me have the house and I didn't agree to let him have the house, we sold in the open market and get our shares.
For me, divorce is one in a lifetime, i would not wan to DIY, as I wouldn't need to go through it again. And the time spend to DIY is really not worth it. Better to channel my energy somewhere else.
I did use a lawyer. I don't think i was able to do what the lawyer had done. There are many terms which I don't understand, and if really going to do myself, i definitely will need more time and energy, as if divorce is not stressful enough, i would have breakdown.
Anyway, my ex, didn't wan to let me have the house and I didn't agree to let him have the house, we sold in the open market and get our shares.
For me, divorce is one in a lifetime, i would not wan to DIY, as I wouldn't need to go through it again. And the time spend to DIY is really not worth it. Better to channel my energy somewhere else.
yes agreed.
We should not get deeper and deeper into path of destruction and revenge.
Get what is yours and move forward.
I had to borrow money to hire a lawyer to settle my divorce. I hired alawyer but it was smooth, not such thing as delay or purposely asking for postponement.
I have wasted my youth and money on that useless guy, i am not going to lose my mind, job and more time on that man. I wanted speedy divorce. I never regretted hiring a lawyer to settle the divorce as it was trouble free and didn't have stress over it
We should not get deeper and deeper into path of destruction and revenge.
Get what is yours and move forward.
I had to borrow money to hire a lawyer to settle my divorce. I hired alawyer but it was smooth, not such thing as delay or purposely asking for postponement.
I have wasted my youth and money on that useless guy, i am not going to lose my mind, job and more time on that man. I wanted speedy divorce. I never regretted hiring a lawyer to settle the divorce as it was trouble free and didn't have stress over it
lavendards
Member
Both sides of the story all revealed after so much online bashing? Or just one sided all along? Food for thought...
Good for sharing because this could be happening to your own son in time to come. Karma.
Agreed with sadliving. Get a lawyer, dig out shit on both side, laid it on table, decides what is best for yourself, for him, for the child, and just move on.
All of us in here have the knowledge to help those in need.
Good for sharing because this could be happening to your own son in time to come. Karma.
Agreed with sadliving. Get a lawyer, dig out shit on both side, laid it on table, decides what is best for yourself, for him, for the child, and just move on.
All of us in here have the knowledge to help those in need.
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Cos u ladies hv $. .. When u r faced with harsh adverse circumstances with tight finances ... The whole issue becomes so real in the face especially when I hv to speak in front of the judge to mediate my defense.. But thru it all, I'm force to learn ...to know what goes on in court. Ur lawyer represent u n u don't even need to go so u will not believe what I say...whatever, I hv the knowledge to help others in same conditions as I.
God bless
God bless
strongmummy82
Member
So hows the proceeding for u so far gladjo? Are things settled for u?
I got 2 court friends appointed to me by the judge throughout this case, teaching me all I need n going for PreTrail conf mid April then the real thing will be around June n the on the hand I hv a maintenance order running simultaneously..so he is nw at a lost..he hv to fight both ends with heavy lawyer fees while it cost me less then $209 till nw .. My lawyer will fight the ancillary but not nw.
I'm open to share n guide my experience if any mummy needs. I didn't hv a choice but thank God for court friends n legal aid from bf n church friends.
I'm open to share n guide my experience if any mummy needs. I didn't hv a choice but thank God for court friends n legal aid from bf n church friends.
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lavendards
Member
pixie ng
Well-Known Member
i believe your lawyer can arrange courier to his house. however he have to sign the papers in front of lawyer (either his lawyer or your lawyer)
superdepress
New Member
can someone advise me.... how can i make my ex-husband pay child maintenance fee up to age 21 years old as a lump sum????
he tries to sell our flat and he will get 100k cash.... i want to make him pay for child maintenance as a lump sum... but his lawyer excuse is... scare i squander away the money.
he tries to sell our flat and he will get 100k cash.... i want to make him pay for child maintenance as a lump sum... but his lawyer excuse is... scare i squander away the money.
pixie ng
Well-Known Member
so far i never hear before child maintenance in a lump sum because the child maintenance suppose to spend for your child daily expenses...
but i do heard before alimony is given lump sum, instead of monthly basis.
perhaps you can request for lump sum alimony?
mousemoomoo
Member
Hi,pls recommend a good experienced lawyer and not too ex for the divorce matters for my sister.
Kindly PM me the contacts.
Thanks in advance.
May ask is there any law in Spore to protect Women's as in though both husband and wife are working with comparable wages amount, the wife can still request for alimony?
What is the chance of success?
My sister do not have any kids though.
Kindly PM me the contacts.
Thanks in advance.
May ask is there any law in Spore to protect Women's as in though both husband and wife are working with comparable wages amount, the wife can still request for alimony?
What is the chance of success?
My sister do not have any kids though.
deprived
Member
Just curious, why does she want alimony with no kids and both are working with comparable wages amount?
I mean you can argue who doesn't want more money, but seriously...
One would think if you earn comparably, the standard of living would be comparable, as such, Alimony, or Maintenance, in this case doesn't quite apply..
Unless, of course, if your sister has been using alot of his money plus her money to have a higher standing of living for herself that otherwise wouldn't have been possible based on her income alone, then there is still a case to fight for..
It is hard to give inputs when so little info is provided.. Hope this helps..
But then again.. I'm not a lawyer.. just some common sense thinking person trying to interpret the law with limited knowledge and understanding but wanting to help..
Maintenance
This depends on a number of factors. The Judge will consider the financial standing and earning capacity of both you and your husband/ex-husband. He will also consider the standard of living enjoyed by both of you during the marriage. Ages of the parties and the duration of the marriage are also factors considered. The Judge will try to place you in the same standard of living, as you would have enjoyed, if the marriage had not broken down.
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mousemoomoo
Member
Just curious, why does she want alimony with no kids and both are working with comparable wages amount?
I mean you can argue who doesn't want more money, but seriously...
One would think if you earn comparably, the standard of living would be comparable, as such, Alimony, or Maintenance, in this case doesn't quite apply..
Unless, of course, if your sister has been using alot of his money plus her money to have a higher standing of living for herself that otherwise wouldn't have been possible based on her income alone, then there is still a case to fight for..
It is hard to give inputs when so little info is provided.. Hope this helps..
But then again.. I'm not a lawyer.. just some common sense thinking person trying to interpret the law with limited knowledge and understanding but wanting to help..
Maintenance
This depends on a number of factors. The Judge will consider the financial standing and earning capacity of both you and your husband/ex-husband. He will also consider the standard of living enjoyed by both of you during the marriage. Ages of the parties and the duration of the marriage are also factors considered. The Judge will try to place you in the same standard of living, as you would have enjoyed, if the marriage had not broken down.
Actually my sis's marriage turns sour during their 1st year !
Her hubby is not willing to share cost for house utilities and , furthermore since they were newly married, my sis tried to squeeze in time after her work to cook so both can enjoy homecooked food during certain weekdays,guess what.. the hubby complain wasting gas, water $.
it is like pouring cold water on my sis efforts made.
And he also grumbles about grocery shopping where $ need to spend too.
He is those type that is not willing to fork out $ to contribute in the household.
My sis suggested marriage counselling 1 years ago ( during their 3rd year of marraige), they went once and the hubby say he is not going anymore.
Reason being the counseling need to pay a fee for each session.
The story is long and I do not wish to write further details.
My sis is also paying 50% of the resale flat hdb loan monthly and also utility costs.
So far my sis had paid 6K more than her hubby from buying the resale flat to renovation and furnishing etc..
So she hopes she can fight as 60-40 for the division of asset division(house) rather than settle for 50-50.
If above is not possible, then will only consider alimony as 1 lump sum.
She had been bearing with it as we told her it is best to sell her house in open market after 5years (as they took the hdb grant since the hubby wanted to stay in the same town with his parents)
They bought their 4 rm flat for abt 465K few years back where pricing was high.
With current market, they are bound to suffer paper loss.
pixie ng
Well-Known Member
i dun think HDB works this way... for me i pay 80% my ex pay 20%. for furniture, renovation and utilities, i pay everything. in the eyes of HDB, the flat is divide to 80% me and 20% him.. they dun take in other misc expenses... anyway i'm not very calculative about these expenses because after buying 20% from him, i'm still living in the flat too... now i own 100%, so i sell in open market now, i earn quite alot...
mousemoomoo
Member
Yes likely the division is 50-50 .That is why she is seeing any possibilities to fight for more to cover some of her expenses on the misc.It is not abt being calculative or not.She just want to minimise the loss ,anyway there isnt any hard cash back in her case due to the market value of her flat now vs the outstanding hdb loan.
So hope to find a good and reasonable charge lawyer to advise and hopefully can fight for her request.
So hope to find a good and reasonable charge lawyer to advise and hopefully can fight for her request.
pixie ng
Well-Known Member
since is 50-50, she is making loss, the ex also will be making loss.. will be split loss...
i do not understand the logic which she must have more shares because she paid more in misc costs. to me this argument is being calculative because during marriage some will pay more some will pay less. there is no rule which state guy must pay more than gal.
perhaps i'm seeing the overall picture rather than one side *shrug*
p.s: btw you better check need to pay back housing grant. because some told me is need to pay back + interest.. some told me no need... coz i also planning to sell my HDB
i do not understand the logic which she must have more shares because she paid more in misc costs. to me this argument is being calculative because during marriage some will pay more some will pay less. there is no rule which state guy must pay more than gal.
perhaps i'm seeing the overall picture rather than one side *shrug*
p.s: btw you better check need to pay back housing grant. because some told me is need to pay back + interest.. some told me no need... coz i also planning to sell my HDB
whiterose80
New Member
how does hdb divide? confirm 50 50? if we were to buy over from our spouse if we have sufficient funds is it ok? but surely he wanna make money from the selling if selling can get good returns right?
pixie ng
Well-Known Member
hdb confirm by how much you have paid using CPF. for cash, you need to have evidence that you are the one who is making the payment. if you have pay 20% means you are entitled to 20% share.
you can buy the shares over from your spouse provided you are 35yrs old (under single scheme) or you have a family nucleus. Please note you need to pay back his accrual interest which 2.5%
Hi, had been missing out alot in here. My interim judgement was given last Thursday w/o parties attending. Next would be the mediation for the ancillary part. Awaiting my lawyers update. Now im worried wht my ex would do as hes persistent in patching things back after 7 mths of separation. I can't seem to accept him back after knowing wht he has done which most likely he will not change. I just lost my dad too. Staying strong with lil guidance. Hopefully all goes well for every1 here.
pixie ng
Well-Known Member
at least your case already start. now is interim judgement, if everything go smooth smooth, 3months time can divorce liao!
then again, i dun have mediation coz both of us agrees on the t&c...
strongmummy82
Member
What changes does he want to make?
pixie ng
Well-Known Member
as long as the divorce is moving, it is good news... it's matter of time that you will be free of him
smiggleprincess
Active Member
good for u u..
ay least u have interim
i wait so long still don have..
my ex fight for everythin...
its been 6 mths ans still mediation mediation..
unless he grab my son away i also cant do anythin
ay least u have interim
i wait so long still don have..
my ex fight for everythin...
its been 6 mths ans still mediation mediation..
unless he grab my son away i also cant do anythin
Stay positive. Im also unsure of my ex motive. He just shifted into out matrimonial flat claiming he was chased out by his family. Hopefully within this 3 mths, i can sort the flat and maintenance. Just moving forward. Lately a number of calefares entrance in my life. lol waste time.
wendy_reborn
Active Member
u file for PPO, do u have evidence of his violence?
smiggleprincess
Active Member
I also file for ppo, no need lawyer
iwontbite2
Member
I want to ask, if one party (me) didn't pay any for the HDB flat does it mean that I won't able to fight for this flat? How about child custody? And the overall cost of divorce? My most important thing is my child, how to win the custody?
Sadgirl123
New Member
Jokergerl, at least u are on the way to divorce. I wish i can have my freedom like you. I ask for divorce and he refused, acting himself like a victim. Now everyone ask me to tolerate and forgive him. How to tolerate if he keep contacting the bitch behind my back? Why guy want to have an affair and refused to take responsbility?
iwontbite2
Member
How likely will the judge give the care and control to me (mother)? My child is only 2 years old.
Same in my case - mine left his gf & badly wants me back now. Seems like he values my worth now. but what's the point. Nothing can be undone. 9 mths of separation leaving me to defend fr my son just made me stronger to move forward. Im not regretting taking the first step to ask fr divorce. Many having been coaxing me to join baq with him. But I cant seem to accept neither see a future w him. Even now , hes staying temporarily at our flat. He keep changing his mind & said now just return the flat back to hdb & can pay me only $300 maintenence fr our son. Just pissing me off. Im paying the fr the house , reno loan son expenses all by myself. To think abt it, hes a waste of my time.
pixie ng
Well-Known Member
ya! i support you! now you are happier without him and can live without him, then he come crawling back. this type of man really cannot trust.