Child Adoption
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iwantitvmuch
Member
I thhink if home interview is scheduled, we should be passing the HSR.
I think we might be able to bring the baby back but can't proceed with the adoption because there's no approval to proceed with.
To proceed with legal adoption, we need the approval from MCYS. The agent told me that she can 'reserve(keep)' the baby for me if I would like to keep the baby.
Alot of 'I think' because I'm not really sure. But the agent doesn't have a HSR to keep the baby at her home too.
I think we might be able to bring the baby back but can't proceed with the adoption because there's no approval to proceed with.
To proceed with legal adoption, we need the approval from MCYS. The agent told me that she can 'reserve(keep)' the baby for me if I would like to keep the baby.
Alot of 'I think' because I'm not really sure. But the agent doesn't have a HSR to keep the baby at her home too.
Sorry for my questions..
Do u think its better not to start looking and fall in love with a baby until we get MCYS approval? That is to protect ourselves from disappointment in case anything doesnt go according to plan..esp pple like us..been thru so many disappointments alrdy..
dont mean to pour cold water and dampen the excitement here..but Im genuinely asking these questions cuz Im a very cautious n kiasi/kiasu person.. want to know wat u ladies think?
Do u think its better not to start looking and fall in love with a baby until we get MCYS approval? That is to protect ourselves from disappointment in case anything doesnt go according to plan..esp pple like us..been thru so many disappointments alrdy..
dont mean to pour cold water and dampen the excitement here..but Im genuinely asking these questions cuz Im a very cautious n kiasi/kiasu person.. want to know wat u ladies think?
babylove80
New Member
Hi Die,
It's been some time hey. How's the job coming along?
You have a lot of thought-provoking questions here. I guess a lot of us have different experiences. I am one of the examples who went ahead to identify a baby before the HSR. For me, it was important to know that I will HAVE a baby, rather than be put on a waiting list as I would not bear the thought of not having one soon. I should have known better right? But I was just over the moon, and in love with my boy.
I don't think MCYS would fail a couple unless there is something really wrong, or they have identified an issue which cannot be resolved.
I think most of us here have suffered some kind of loss, so the fear might always be there. I think there is some risk involved when adopting. I love my little one so much, but at the back of my mind, there is this nagging thought, what if things don't pan out the away it was meant to be. He is now 4 months 3 weeks plus, but I have already given him my all for 3mths and half. But a lot of times, it's faith that delivers me through these hurdles. I just focus towards the end of the journey when I bring him back to Singapore. It is hard seeing him only during weekends.
This is my experience. On hindsight, I should have stepped back and went thru the HSR frirst. But I don't regret any of it. The only thing I regret is not being able to see his growth and development each day.
It's been some time hey. How's the job coming along?
You have a lot of thought-provoking questions here. I guess a lot of us have different experiences. I am one of the examples who went ahead to identify a baby before the HSR. For me, it was important to know that I will HAVE a baby, rather than be put on a waiting list as I would not bear the thought of not having one soon. I should have known better right? But I was just over the moon, and in love with my boy.
I don't think MCYS would fail a couple unless there is something really wrong, or they have identified an issue which cannot be resolved.
I think most of us here have suffered some kind of loss, so the fear might always be there. I think there is some risk involved when adopting. I love my little one so much, but at the back of my mind, there is this nagging thought, what if things don't pan out the away it was meant to be. He is now 4 months 3 weeks plus, but I have already given him my all for 3mths and half. But a lot of times, it's faith that delivers me through these hurdles. I just focus towards the end of the journey when I bring him back to Singapore. It is hard seeing him only during weekends.
This is my experience. On hindsight, I should have stepped back and went thru the HSR frirst. But I don't regret any of it. The only thing I regret is not being able to see his growth and development each day.
Blesswbb,don't care abt wat's ur friend said... hug... best of luck to ur IVF, remember not to stress...
Dream, hang on there... I can imagine the toughness & stress your're experiencing.... hug!!
Janella missed you at the workshop yesterday, we'll have chance to meet up again.
Dream, hang on there... I can imagine the toughness & stress your're experiencing.... hug!!
Janella missed you at the workshop yesterday, we'll have chance to meet up again.
iwantitvmuch
Member
Die, I agree with Babylove too. Initially, I wanted to wait till I get the approval but I think now that I reach the home interview stage, I can approach the agent. My husband and I are very good candidate and have two friends who worked for MCYS's adoption to write reference for me! So, I will surely pass! hee hee. I had to start looking for a baby because my bosses are anticipating my adoption leave and alot of things are put on hold. They are okay with it but I don't want to inconvenience anyone. Never did I expect that Alice has a baby for me! Well, tomorrow is the final test lah. I still need to bond with the bb tomorrow. Need to pray now! Update you all later.
BlesswBB, do you want to PM me your phone number? I've bought the basic stuff IN CASE I can bring BB home. I even bought a maxicosy infant car seat just now!! I'll drop by your place for the clothes if I bring baby back.
BlesswBB, do you want to PM me your phone number? I've bought the basic stuff IN CASE I can bring BB home. I even bought a maxicosy infant car seat just now!! I'll drop by your place for the clothes if I bring baby back.
babylove80
New Member
It's my first deepavali with my boy, and I am so excited! The hotel I am staying at has free broadband, so I brought my laptop with me.
I just re-read the thread, because I thought I missed out on something re blesswbb.
I cannot believe how insensitive some people can be esp friends. But to be fair to them, how would they know unless they are in the situation. I have had 'friends' who find it their business to convince me to try IVF etc, and who ask me a million times 'what's wrong' without thinking that it's a personal question. Most of the time, their faces are alarmed, like as if adopting is such a crime. Then they go on to say 'that's nice of you'. I turn around and tell them, I am not doing charity! Even if I could have my own, I would adopt a little one.
Blesswbb, if I might suggest, and I hope you are not going to be upset with what I say. If these were your good friends, I think that it's important to let them know how you felt, and that you would appreciate it if they could be more supportive. It's your decison afterall.
Just focus on taking care of yourself for your nxt IVF. Whenever you feel down, just come to this thread and post your feelings. I won't know what to say, but I am sure that there is more than enough support to go around.
A big hug for you from JB.
I just re-read the thread, because I thought I missed out on something re blesswbb.
I cannot believe how insensitive some people can be esp friends. But to be fair to them, how would they know unless they are in the situation. I have had 'friends' who find it their business to convince me to try IVF etc, and who ask me a million times 'what's wrong' without thinking that it's a personal question. Most of the time, their faces are alarmed, like as if adopting is such a crime. Then they go on to say 'that's nice of you'. I turn around and tell them, I am not doing charity! Even if I could have my own, I would adopt a little one.
Blesswbb, if I might suggest, and I hope you are not going to be upset with what I say. If these were your good friends, I think that it's important to let them know how you felt, and that you would appreciate it if they could be more supportive. It's your decison afterall.
Just focus on taking care of yourself for your nxt IVF. Whenever you feel down, just come to this thread and post your feelings. I won't know what to say, but I am sure that there is more than enough support to go around.
A big hug for you from JB.
iwantitvmuch
Member
BlesswBB, like babylove, I've also missed out on the post about your insensitive friends. I'm abit shock if they are your friends. Maybe you should tell them that they are abit mean. Maybe they are jealous that you have such a beautiful daughter now even though you don't have to go through 9 months of pregnancy and labour pain.
But often, i do a mental calculation on whether they are worth educating.
Actually, one of my male colleague actually said that one good way of looking at not giving birth is that it will maintain our slim body. HAHA! Ultimately, the man still want us to look good! my hubby try to console me too, especially that my mom ballooned after giving birth to my bros and me. My gf was also saying that breastfeeding doesn't seems so noble to herself and she felt really lousy while breastfeeding because of the smell and mess. Some mothers like to glamourise their pregnancy and we should let them be.
Some people are not sensible. But if they know the pain we are going through, they definitely wouldn't make fun of us.
But often, i do a mental calculation on whether they are worth educating.
Actually, one of my male colleague actually said that one good way of looking at not giving birth is that it will maintain our slim body. HAHA! Ultimately, the man still want us to look good! my hubby try to console me too, especially that my mom ballooned after giving birth to my bros and me. My gf was also saying that breastfeeding doesn't seems so noble to herself and she felt really lousy while breastfeeding because of the smell and mess. Some mothers like to glamourise their pregnancy and we should let them be.
Some people are not sensible. But if they know the pain we are going through, they definitely wouldn't make fun of us.
iwantitvmuch, babylove80,
Well I guess u r rite, im just a negative-thinking person cuz bad things have happenned to me and i have been very unlucky in the baby department so always think of worst case scenario. But if a home visit is scheduled that means should be passing the requirements already la..so far I have not heard of anyone failing any requirements to be adoptive parents..
Well abt my new job ;( turns out the environment is very tense and staff morale very poor. My boss and my manager bomb my handphone with sms in the morning before I wake up and all day through..the boss and the manager also quarrelled in front of me and the manager burst into tears at least 5 times during my 3 weeks of work..alot of bitching and complaining..I cannot work like that much less to lead the team and felt so stressed out..during the 3 weeks i was there, two teachers and the manager handed in their resignation letters. Last Friday, I threw in my towel and quit on the spot, forfeiting a weeks' pay in lieu of notice and walked right out to go home feeling so relieved! Now, one week later, I heard that another 2 more teachers resigned..wat a crazy place!
Im starting a new job as a teacher in another childcare centre on Monday. That was my first bad experience as a principal..I think Im not cut out to be a leader..cant take all that stress..so better settle for a teaching job instead with less pay and less headache..;(
Well I guess u r rite, im just a negative-thinking person cuz bad things have happenned to me and i have been very unlucky in the baby department so always think of worst case scenario. But if a home visit is scheduled that means should be passing the requirements already la..so far I have not heard of anyone failing any requirements to be adoptive parents..
Well abt my new job ;( turns out the environment is very tense and staff morale very poor. My boss and my manager bomb my handphone with sms in the morning before I wake up and all day through..the boss and the manager also quarrelled in front of me and the manager burst into tears at least 5 times during my 3 weeks of work..alot of bitching and complaining..I cannot work like that much less to lead the team and felt so stressed out..during the 3 weeks i was there, two teachers and the manager handed in their resignation letters. Last Friday, I threw in my towel and quit on the spot, forfeiting a weeks' pay in lieu of notice and walked right out to go home feeling so relieved! Now, one week later, I heard that another 2 more teachers resigned..wat a crazy place!
Im starting a new job as a teacher in another childcare centre on Monday. That was my first bad experience as a principal..I think Im not cut out to be a leader..cant take all that stress..so better settle for a teaching job instead with less pay and less headache..;(
BlessBB,iwantitvmuch,
Actually, I think these pple who made the comments r just jeolous that we dont have to suffer the pain of childbirth to have a beautiful baby..maybe we can remind them that we did suffer another kind of worse pain...the anguish of infertility, miscarriages, IVF failure, the fear of never experiencing motherhood in this lifetime..perhaps that will shut these insensitive pple up.
Actually, I think these pple who made the comments r just jeolous that we dont have to suffer the pain of childbirth to have a beautiful baby..maybe we can remind them that we did suffer another kind of worse pain...the anguish of infertility, miscarriages, IVF failure, the fear of never experiencing motherhood in this lifetime..perhaps that will shut these insensitive pple up.
iwantitvmuch
Member
die,
which bad school is that ?? hee hee. I'm sure u can't tell.
haha, you very funny leh. reply so many times. ya, we all eventually become fat fat after a while.
infertility is scary and is an open wound, it hurts and heals and then hurts again. I'm just glad that I'm stronger now. I still think about it but am definitely stronger. The most important is that I'm not bitter about it. Let's not let infertility wins.
which bad school is that ?? hee hee. I'm sure u can't tell.
haha, you very funny leh. reply so many times. ya, we all eventually become fat fat after a while.
infertility is scary and is an open wound, it hurts and heals and then hurts again. I'm just glad that I'm stronger now. I still think about it but am definitely stronger. The most important is that I'm not bitter about it. Let's not let infertility wins.
sweetcl, i hv enable my pm. try try again..
die, which childcare center is tat ? it sounds really scary !
Anyway, be it principal or teacher, it's a gd choice as it will make you happy.
iwantitvmuch, hehe, u r lucky with ur references
How's ur tues' preparation ? All the best ya !
die, which childcare center is tat ? it sounds really scary !
Anyway, be it principal or teacher, it's a gd choice as it will make you happy.
iwantitvmuch, hehe, u r lucky with ur references
How's ur tues' preparation ? All the best ya !
die, I got 2 dogs too. I put it in my HSR so they were expectg the 2 of them. wah, glad u r outta yr former work place. doesn't sound conducive at all! Re: weight. I also fat but lost 3 kg the 1st wk bb came home. stress, hahaha! now weight creeping back ;(
Iwantitvmuch, how? did u visit Alice n bb 2day or is it tom? wah, maxicosy car seat - nice!
Iwantitvmuch, how? did u visit Alice n bb 2day or is it tom? wah, maxicosy car seat - nice!
babylove 80,
happy deepavali. It must be a great day and it is nice of you to think of us during your holiday
your boy must be so happy.
Die
sorry to hear about the stress you went thru and u definitely made the right decision. Quite scary to think that there can be so much politics in a childcare! Otherwise, try to be more positive
I am sure things will turn out fine for you and hubby.
Iwantitvmuch,
how was your visit? I remember I fell in love with my bb the second I saw him. It is such a strong and nice feeling. Just like babylove poem. All the hardship disappeared and i can't imagine our family without him.
Otherwise I was like you. Bought car seat and trolley before bb came. If you have not bought the cot I saw today in toys r us in vivo that they are selling cot with mattress for 99. Really worth it but cot is quite small and do not become a junior bed.
Blesswbb and yuli
somehow my bb boy slept for more than 3 hours for the last 2 days. Really hope that this continues. It feels so awkward so always wake up to check on him!
happy deepavali. It must be a great day and it is nice of you to think of us during your holiday
Die
sorry to hear about the stress you went thru and u definitely made the right decision. Quite scary to think that there can be so much politics in a childcare! Otherwise, try to be more positive
Iwantitvmuch,
how was your visit? I remember I fell in love with my bb the second I saw him. It is such a strong and nice feeling. Just like babylove poem. All the hardship disappeared and i can't imagine our family without him.
Otherwise I was like you. Bought car seat and trolley before bb came. If you have not bought the cot I saw today in toys r us in vivo that they are selling cot with mattress for 99. Really worth it but cot is quite small and do not become a junior bed.
Blesswbb and yuli
somehow my bb boy slept for more than 3 hours for the last 2 days. Really hope that this continues. It feels so awkward so always wake up to check on him!
hi dream/yuli/jinella/babylove80/blesswbb,
thanks for all of ur well-wishes. I'll try to stay positive and i believe i will be a mum soon too.
i'll update u all abt my progress here.
looking thru the recent posts, i realise tat Alice is quite capable of getting babies...so fast can get to see bb liao... i thot got to be on waiting list for quite sometime.. u all really lucky!
thanks for all of ur well-wishes. I'll try to stay positive and i believe i will be a mum soon too.
i'll update u all abt my progress here.
looking thru the recent posts, i realise tat Alice is quite capable of getting babies...so fast can get to see bb liao... i thot got to be on waiting list for quite sometime.. u all really lucky!
babylove, iwantitvmuch , die
Thanks for the advise...i wanted to tell her off but like u ladies said...some pple are insensitive and she definitely one of them. Maybe she don use her big brain...anyway i'm already used to her words...and many times my friends and myself have told her off. And again she doesnt get our point.
iwantitvmuch,
How's your visit? Did u fall in love with her? Yr prayers will be answered
dream,
Don worry he tend to sleep longer during nite time (4-5hrs) when his day sleep cut short. My dd have few short nap during the day and sleep longer in nite now.
I'm going deaf soon with my girl now like to scream when she's angry. She getting very fierce. Ever heard of girls with curly hair very fierce and naughty? She's one of them.
So Yuli, don envy my girl hair anymore
Thanks for the advise...i wanted to tell her off but like u ladies said...some pple are insensitive and she definitely one of them. Maybe she don use her big brain...anyway i'm already used to her words...and many times my friends and myself have told her off. And again she doesnt get our point.
iwantitvmuch,
How's your visit? Did u fall in love with her? Yr prayers will be answered
dream,
Don worry he tend to sleep longer during nite time (4-5hrs) when his day sleep cut short. My dd have few short nap during the day and sleep longer in nite now.
I'm going deaf soon with my girl now like to scream when she's angry. She getting very fierce. Ever heard of girls with curly hair very fierce and naughty? She's one of them.
So Yuli, don envy my girl hair anymore
iwantitvmuch
Member
Hey, you all must be anxious with my visit yesterday!
Baby is fair and pretty , I must say. She was sleeping the whole time I was carrying her. So, I didn't get to see her eyes or how she behave when she's awake.
So, I didn't get to interact with her. I didn't fall in love with her but I'm thinking about her. It was her one month old birthday yesterday! I'm thinking of visiting her with my mother today.
Baby is fair and pretty , I must say. She was sleeping the whole time I was carrying her. So, I didn't get to see her eyes or how she behave when she's awake.
So, I didn't get to interact with her. I didn't fall in love with her but I'm thinking about her. It was her one month old birthday yesterday! I'm thinking of visiting her with my mother today.
blesswbb,
my daughter don't have curly hair but double hairline and she is also very naughty! So, just to let you know you are not alone!
Iwantitvmuch
Yes, was waiting anxiously for your post. Let us know how was the visit with your mum. Otherwise, bonding is not immediate and it will grow after you take care of her. So, don't worry. I was talking to my colleague last week and she told me that although she gave birth it also took her a while to bond and get to know her daughter. So I think your feeling is normal and I hope she opened her eyes when you met her today. What is her weight now? Keep us posted!
my daughter don't have curly hair but double hairline and she is also very naughty! So, just to let you know you are not alone!
Iwantitvmuch
Yes, was waiting anxiously for your post. Let us know how was the visit with your mum. Otherwise, bonding is not immediate and it will grow after you take care of her. So, don't worry. I was talking to my colleague last week and she told me that although she gave birth it also took her a while to bond and get to know her daughter. So I think your feeling is normal and I hope she opened her eyes when you met her today. What is her weight now? Keep us posted!
iwantitvmuch
Member
My parents, mother and sister-in-law love the baby. Baby is growing on me. We want her!! Guess I'm the latest to graduate to be a mommy.
iwantitvmuch,
Congrats!!! Welcome to motherhood!!
Start shopping now....So did Alice leave baby with u today? Go thru the medical checkup on Tuesday? Rememeber to check whether Alice able to extend the visiting pass for her if not u miss her when she's not in sg.
So wat abt the bb stuff? U still wan them? Shall i pass it to Alice?
Congrats!!! Welcome to motherhood!!
Start shopping now....So did Alice leave baby with u today? Go thru the medical checkup on Tuesday? Rememeber to check whether Alice able to extend the visiting pass for her if not u miss her when she's not in sg.
So wat abt the bb stuff? U still wan them? Shall i pass it to Alice?
iwantitvmuch
Member
Thank you all for the well wishes.
No, Alice didn't leave the baby with me but it's fine. I don't have help yet. We'll do the checkup next Monday with Alice. I'll apply for leave that day. I will speak to my boss and will probably start the adoption leave after my offsite at the mid of Nov. Alice will extend the visiting pass she said.
A girlfriend is passing me some unopen presents. If convenient, can you pass the bb stuff to Alice. Then, you can visit my baby!! Or else, I can visit you on sat or sun. Thanks for speaking to me just now.
My dad just called to say that the birthday of bb is the same as our minister mentor, 16th Sept! So funny.
No, Alice didn't leave the baby with me but it's fine. I don't have help yet. We'll do the checkup next Monday with Alice. I'll apply for leave that day. I will speak to my boss and will probably start the adoption leave after my offsite at the mid of Nov. Alice will extend the visiting pass she said.
A girlfriend is passing me some unopen presents. If convenient, can you pass the bb stuff to Alice. Then, you can visit my baby!! Or else, I can visit you on sat or sun. Thanks for speaking to me just now.
My dad just called to say that the birthday of bb is the same as our minister mentor, 16th Sept! So funny.
iwantitvmuch,
Great to read that everything is falling into place. I guess you need some time to organise yourself. But as it will take some time for medical to be done, you may want to do it earlier. There are some PDs that have night clinic if annual leave is an issue for you.
Otherwise, you will be taking her right after the medical is passed, right? Your parents or in law would help you to take care of her till mid November? I guess you need to source for your helper as well, if I recall correctly.
Otherwise, don't forget me! I also want to meet all of you. May be we should plan for the gathering in end November...after you have started your adoption leave and have some time to bond with your girl.
Ladies,
Somehow, my boy woke me up last night every 1.5 hour! but I guess he is regulating himself..since most of the time, he did not drink milk...(waste of milk!). Just wanted to be carried and by the time milk is ready, he is fast asleep. I guess his behaviour is changing daily. He is about 4.8 kg now. He will be two months at the end of the week.
Great to read that everything is falling into place. I guess you need some time to organise yourself. But as it will take some time for medical to be done, you may want to do it earlier. There are some PDs that have night clinic if annual leave is an issue for you.
Otherwise, you will be taking her right after the medical is passed, right? Your parents or in law would help you to take care of her till mid November? I guess you need to source for your helper as well, if I recall correctly.
Otherwise, don't forget me! I also want to meet all of you. May be we should plan for the gathering in end November...after you have started your adoption leave and have some time to bond with your girl.
Ladies,
Somehow, my boy woke me up last night every 1.5 hour! but I guess he is regulating himself..since most of the time, he did not drink milk...(waste of milk!). Just wanted to be carried and by the time milk is ready, he is fast asleep. I guess his behaviour is changing daily. He is about 4.8 kg now. He will be two months at the end of the week.
babylove80
New Member
Hi Ladies,
Thanks for the wishes on FB
. Deepavali was really stressful, that I ended up with a huge headache yesterday. I felt as if I was suffering a hangover. Am back at work still recovering, and missing my BB. Sighz..
Iwantitverymuch,
You must be so excited. But don't get overwhelmed ok. Just take things one step at a time. I think it's best to get your home ready first, becos once bb arrives, you won't have much time.
I think it's just me, Janella, Sweetclo & Elle who are waiting for our office interview dates. Do you think the applications will be approved before Christmas? I am so anxious.
Blesswbb,
I admire your resilience towards such insensitive remarks. Do keep us updated on your progress.
Thanks for the wishes on FB
Iwantitverymuch,
You must be so excited. But don't get overwhelmed ok. Just take things one step at a time. I think it's best to get your home ready first, becos once bb arrives, you won't have much time.
I think it's just me, Janella, Sweetclo & Elle who are waiting for our office interview dates. Do you think the applications will be approved before Christmas? I am so anxious.
Blesswbb,
I admire your resilience towards such insensitive remarks. Do keep us updated on your progress.
So happy to log in this morning and read such wonderful wonderful news! Congrats iwantitvmuch! Happy happy for you! Just to share, we didn’t fall in love” or connect straight away with our dd – but now she’s really got all of us around her little finger
I also didn’t bring my dd home till after the medical. She was with Alice for about a week after we first met her. So all in with Alice for about 2+ weeks. I feel Alice did a great job with my dd’s early days.
All the best for the home visit tomorrow. I remember asking the assessor what she’ll be looking out for and she said she WONT be chking the amt of dust on my tables hahaha. She’ll just be making sure the home is conducive and we’re not using it as a gambling den or other illegal purposes! So I think on that front, we will all pass the home visit lah!
Dream, hahaha, I remember I did the same thing when my dd slept for about 5hrs at a stretch the 1st time. Instead of sleeping more, I ended up waking up more just to check to make sure she’s ok! This past week her pattern changed – again. She was very good and giving us about a 5 to 6hr sleep stretch each night but this past week she’s been waking every 3 hrs for feeds..............I’m attributing it to a growth spurt.
Die – Alice told me that once the assessor schedules a home visit, it more or less means they’ll approve your HSR within 2 weeks. What happens after the home visit is, the assessor will finish up a 8-9 page report about her findings (from the office interview and home visit) and that’s the report that goes to MCYS to state our suitability as adoptive parents. Once they call/send you the HSR, that’s basically your ‘green card’ to adopt and bring a baby home. Alice told me that once the home visit is done, then you can actually start talking to agents etc to indicate your interest to adopt. If the timing is right, prospective parents may have identified a baby by the time the HSR is approved/in your hands! In my case, I waited till I got the HSR in my hands before calling Alice because MCYS had quite a few health related questions that they wanted our doctors to answer so that took a while so I wanted to be very sure they were gonna approve our case before I called Alice. Every case is different. I know of others who have gone ahead to meet their babies first while waiting for the final report to be out then by the time the report is out, they would have done medical etc and baby can come home already! So that really cuts short the waiting time. So just go with your gut feel when your time comes. You will know what feels right
Babylove – a belated happy deepavali! Why was it stressful? This year will be filled with many 1sts for us here
Iwantitvmuch, not fair leh, blesswbb may get to see your bb first. Not fair, not fair, hahaha. Post a pic soon, ok?
I also didn’t bring my dd home till after the medical. She was with Alice for about a week after we first met her. So all in with Alice for about 2+ weeks. I feel Alice did a great job with my dd’s early days.
All the best for the home visit tomorrow. I remember asking the assessor what she’ll be looking out for and she said she WONT be chking the amt of dust on my tables hahaha. She’ll just be making sure the home is conducive and we’re not using it as a gambling den or other illegal purposes! So I think on that front, we will all pass the home visit lah!
Dream, hahaha, I remember I did the same thing when my dd slept for about 5hrs at a stretch the 1st time. Instead of sleeping more, I ended up waking up more just to check to make sure she’s ok! This past week her pattern changed – again. She was very good and giving us about a 5 to 6hr sleep stretch each night but this past week she’s been waking every 3 hrs for feeds..............I’m attributing it to a growth spurt.
Die – Alice told me that once the assessor schedules a home visit, it more or less means they’ll approve your HSR within 2 weeks. What happens after the home visit is, the assessor will finish up a 8-9 page report about her findings (from the office interview and home visit) and that’s the report that goes to MCYS to state our suitability as adoptive parents. Once they call/send you the HSR, that’s basically your ‘green card’ to adopt and bring a baby home. Alice told me that once the home visit is done, then you can actually start talking to agents etc to indicate your interest to adopt. If the timing is right, prospective parents may have identified a baby by the time the HSR is approved/in your hands! In my case, I waited till I got the HSR in my hands before calling Alice because MCYS had quite a few health related questions that they wanted our doctors to answer so that took a while so I wanted to be very sure they were gonna approve our case before I called Alice. Every case is different. I know of others who have gone ahead to meet their babies first while waiting for the final report to be out then by the time the report is out, they would have done medical etc and baby can come home already! So that really cuts short the waiting time. So just go with your gut feel when your time comes. You will know what feels right
Babylove – a belated happy deepavali! Why was it stressful? This year will be filled with many 1sts for us here
Iwantitvmuch, not fair leh, blesswbb may get to see your bb first. Not fair, not fair, hahaha. Post a pic soon, ok?
iwantitvmuch
Member
Not sure why but we decided on Monday together. I still need some time to get ready and put down the rest of my personal stuff. Hence, I'm fine if it's next Monday. Alice is taking good care of the baby so I'm more comfortable for her to take care of baby as long as possible. As babylove said, I still need to get ready the home and not be overwhelmed with parenthood. Also, I need to give my hubby some time. He taking some time to warm up.
haha, if BlesswBB is free, she would really see the baby first.
haha, if BlesswBB is free, she would really see the baby first.
Yuli,
Nice to see your post and you are right to say that every case is different! but most important is that bb is home when the family is ready! For my case, I grabbed my little boy the minute I saw him. I did not even give Alice a chance to look after him! So, had to take urgent leave to look after him once I took him home.
Otherwise, my mum also says that my bb boy is now her new boss!
Babylove,
I guess you will be a zombie today! I hope you can finalise your HSR soonest.
And of course, crossing fingers for the rest of the ladies to have their bundle of joy before X' Mas.
Nice to see your post and you are right to say that every case is different! but most important is that bb is home when the family is ready! For my case, I grabbed my little boy the minute I saw him. I did not even give Alice a chance to look after him! So, had to take urgent leave to look after him once I took him home.
Otherwise, my mum also says that my bb boy is now her new boss!
Babylove,
I guess you will be a zombie today! I hope you can finalise your HSR soonest.
And of course, crossing fingers for the rest of the ladies to have their bundle of joy before X' Mas.
Dream! my mum says the same of my dd. Her new boss! hahaha, I can just picture you grabbing your little boy and dashing out of Alice's place!
iwantitvmuch, yes, take your time and don't get overwhelmed by parenthood. I felt very overwhelmed the first 3 days after bb arrived home. but things got better once the routine sets in.
iwantitvmuch, yes, take your time and don't get overwhelmed by parenthood. I felt very overwhelmed the first 3 days after bb arrived home. but things got better once the routine sets in.
iwantitvmuch,
is good that u get yr house prepared for the new member.
Do u still need the mittens and booties since yr bb already 1mth old? She wont need these anymore.
Oh do u mind if i take pics of yr girl and launch it in FB? Most likely i will going over to Alice place tmr if she's around.
is good that u get yr house prepared for the new member.
Do u still need the mittens and booties since yr bb already 1mth old? She wont need these anymore.
Oh do u mind if i take pics of yr girl and launch it in FB? Most likely i will going over to Alice place tmr if she's around.
Iwantitvmuch, I'm so happy for you! Congratulations and welcome to motherhood! So while the rest of us are waiting, you together with BlessBB, Dream, Yuli and all the mothers can give us baby tips.
So the ladies, who are waiting, one more person to give us baby tips! Hurray!
Yes, and I agree! Your baby is going to be as smart as Lee Kuan Yew.
Oh by the way, I am kind of amused that I was mistaken for Elle, because I'm actually Indian!
Babylove80, Happy Deepavali! I sure hope that you'll get called for the interview first since you have already chosen your baby. I don't think I can bear the separation if I were in your shoes.Have all your referees sent out their letters yet? I'm still 'chasing' mine.
Die, it must have really been tough at your workplace. I do hope that your next job as a teacher will be much much better.
So the ladies, who are waiting, one more person to give us baby tips! Hurray!
Yes, and I agree! Your baby is going to be as smart as Lee Kuan Yew.
Oh by the way, I am kind of amused that I was mistaken for Elle, because I'm actually Indian!
Babylove80, Happy Deepavali! I sure hope that you'll get called for the interview first since you have already chosen your baby. I don't think I can bear the separation if I were in your shoes.Have all your referees sent out their letters yet? I'm still 'chasing' mine.
Die, it must have really been tough at your workplace. I do hope that your next job as a teacher will be much much better.
iwantitvmuch
Member
BlesswBB, I'm going to Alice's tomorrow around 2pm to visit bb and then home to prepare for the home interview. If you go in the afternoon, I can meet you there. If you go in the morning, after her shower, you might be lucky to see her awake. I haven't seen her awake yet! Alice is still wearing the mittens for her now. I think I will wear mittens for her for a while cos I'm afraid she will scratch herself.
Feel free to take pictures and post it on fb. BB is blessed to have auntie visiting her so fast. I have a picture of myself and the baby. I will post it tonight at FB.
Feel free to take pictures and post it on fb. BB is blessed to have auntie visiting her so fast. I have a picture of myself and the baby. I will post it tonight at FB.
Iwantitvmuch,
Seems like you are already missing her! Do you live nearby Alice? Seems like Blesswbb and you will have the first meeting...so jealous...take pictures, ok..and I will definitely check FB tonight.
Ladies,
Yesterday, felt very bad as I cut his finger skin while cutting his nail. It was the last nail to cut!...feeling so guilty on this. If I remember correctly, Blesswbb had the same unfortunate experience. My hubby said I am too confident...should have got some help but instead decided to do it on my own...so, ladies, just be careful when you cut bb's nail. Somehow, they move very fast when you least expect it...so, now, I think we will put back the mittens until I "get" the licence back to cut his nail from my family!
Blesswbb and Yuli,
Any tip to share on nail cutting?
Janella,
Not sure whether it it too late but Happy Deepavali to you too! Hope you had a great time as well.
Seems like you are already missing her! Do you live nearby Alice? Seems like Blesswbb and you will have the first meeting...so jealous...take pictures, ok..and I will definitely check FB tonight.
Ladies,
Yesterday, felt very bad as I cut his finger skin while cutting his nail. It was the last nail to cut!...feeling so guilty on this. If I remember correctly, Blesswbb had the same unfortunate experience. My hubby said I am too confident...should have got some help but instead decided to do it on my own...so, ladies, just be careful when you cut bb's nail. Somehow, they move very fast when you least expect it...so, now, I think we will put back the mittens until I "get" the licence back to cut his nail from my family!
Blesswbb and Yuli,
Any tip to share on nail cutting?
Janella,
Not sure whether it it too late but Happy Deepavali to you too! Hope you had a great time as well.