Child Adoption

Hi Everyone,

Just an update on my side. Yesterday, I went to Wei Min Clinic at Serangoon Gardens, and saw Dr Eugene Loke for my med exam. I did my blood test in the morning and by the end of the day, the faxed copy of results were in my hands. I want to recommend him to all who need their medical examination report completed as he understood that time is a factor in the case of adoption.
Although my cholesterol levels were high, he indicated on the form that I will be on meds. I am so thankful. I think we should be handing in the forms to Touch tomorrow.
 


babylove 80
congrats! One step closer to motherhood
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Hi ladies,
I agree with disclosing the adoption to my child. But i will do it bit by bit...once the child fully understand what is adoption then i will disclose her adoption. That will depend on her development on understanding not on which age. Cos i believe some child are mature but not all.

Yuli,
Can i check after the 5in1 jab next week does she need to have any jab the following month? I check with Dr Yap from Serangoon (where we have her medical done) he told me they are the same. Anyway, i will be going to him on my little girl development cos i think he's much better than my PD near my place.
Yuli, so envy that yr little girl drink so much...sigh...my little girl is like giving her posion when i give her milk....must really hv alot of patience with her during milk time...
hey...at least yr girl don hv curly hair...my girl is like both of us with curly hair...think she will grow up hating it...haha and also mummy will hv to spend money for her to do rebonding.

dream,
How's yr little boy? Did u try giving him gripewater? Does he still cry during nite time? Really curious to know yr boy look...hope u can post his pics soon.

babylove80,
Congrats!! Looks like 3 of u (elle, iwantivmuch and yrself) can soon be mummy...hope to hear more good news.
 
Blesswbb,
BB is having difficulty breathing at night. I think he got blocked nose and phlegm. Crossing fingers that it is only blocked nose. I have just started to spray salt solution on his nose. It is supposed to loosen mucus. During the day, he is ok though. So, trying to switch off aircon at night but it is really stuffy. Any tip to share? When I googled about blocked nose, it seems quite lot of babies have this after birth as they need to adjust to the air/environment. Have you heard of this? So, he is pretty angry at night as he wants his milk but can't really suck to the bottle as he can't breathe through the nose. Ended up sleeping in the living room last night as it is more airy...

my little boy only not drinking much..about 2 ounces at each feed. When your bb is older, you can give her pediasure. that's what I gave my daughter as she was a picky eater. So, don't despair.

About hair, I guess we are never happy with what we have. I have straight hair but like curly hair...so spending a bomb every year for my curls...not counting the hair lotion!

I have PMed you. Please check your mail.
 
Thanks for your wishes
happy.gif
. I am a tad nervous about the home-study. Alice told me that she will be emailing me in 2 weeks. Sighz...although I feel a weight has been lifted off my shoulder.

Now I have to focus on cleaning the house, and getting ready for the home-study.
 
dream,
it's norm for bb to have congested nose. U may wan to try giving him 'iliadin 0.01%' every nite before he sleeps. This medicine is for infant with nasal congestion. I gave my bb whenever she has congested nose and it's more or less helps in her sleep and feeding. U can get it at guaradian pharmacy...remember to look for 0.01% for infant. If u not sure care check with Alice as she's the one who recommended me this medicine. I'm very curious y Alice has not prepared those medicine for u.
As for my girl feeding problem, i just bgt a multivit to helps improve her appetite. Futhermore, i just realised that to make her drink her milk i need to position her to her liking and she must feel cooling and comfortable before she will drink her bottle of milk.
 
Bleswbb,
Seems like you received royal treatment from Alice! But she did give me some light blankets (to swaddle bb), the red oil, vapour rub and some lotion to clean his umbilical cord. She was very sick when we were doing the medical tests and may be that's why she did not have time to buy everything for me. I already thought it was very thoughtful of her to provide us with all these. Anything else I am missing?

Otherwise, does your bb girl still have congested nose? How long did it last? was it very bad? My PD gave me some medicine to loosen his phlegm as he is really very uncomfortable. My hubby is the worried type! Thanks for the advice and I will make another trip to Guardian!

Seems like your bb is becoming a real princess! and it is just the beginning
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Did you check with Dr whether it is ok to give multivitamins since the milk is already supposed to have the adequate vitamins?

Blesswbb and Yuli
Otherwise, for bb 1 month, we will just buy cakes for neighbours and friends. Any good recommendations?

Babylove80,
That's quite fast! I guess you will be doing spring cleaning this week end
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Before bb was home, we spent our time spring cleaning and we threw so many things! And as hubby said, this was the "biggest" spring cleaning ever! nothing compared to CNY spring cleaning. So, good luck and enjoy the cleaning!
 
dream,
She din provide all but did recommend some of the impt product i need to get for my little girl.
My girl stil sometimes during nite time tend to have congested nose...when i hear different breathing sound i will give her a drop to make her comfortable.
I only give her once on the multivit...anyway its only to help in improving her appetite so i don think it will cause any harm.
Wow...so fast yr boy going 1mth liao...As for the bb 1mth old u can order those traditional kind of package that include red eggs, ang ku kueh and cakes. I give u the link to the website
http://www.sweetestmoments.com.sg/fullmonth/fmpackages.aspx?PGroup=fm2009&vPackageIndex=1

i order it for my colleagues and they find it very fresh and nice.
 
Blesswbb,
Then, may be I am the one receiving special treatment!

Thanks for the website. Have you tested it yourself? which package did u get? I need to hurry! i just called them. Need to order 7 days in advance. Did you personalize the card as well? How did you find them?
 
Dream, The salt water for the congested nose is the first I ever heard. So interesting. Dream, is it effective??

I'm schedule for my office interview on the 28th of September!!
 
iwantitvmuch,
It is called Sterimar. I bought it in Guardian. Not really sure whether it is effective but I guess it is natural remedy.

what is this office interview? you mean they go to your office? or you have to go to their office? In any case, you must be thrilled. 11 days to go..
 
hi Dream, I ordered cranberry butter cakes fr The Royals Cake shop. $8.80 per cake. I bot some cakes 2 give 2 relatives n cake vouchers 2 frens/colleagues so the can collect wen they want. fyi.

will write more soon. my new boss (ie my dd) is going 2 start crying!
 
dream,
ya...i tasted it...and is very nice. I ordered the $8.90 (D01) package. The mochi is very nice...most of my colleagues like the glutinous rice. I din personalize the card as my mum is against the idea...she said if i will to put my bb photo in the card pple will throw it away. Most pple will not keep the card. So i end up used the standard card with a teddy bear on it. I search thru the website. In fact i found a few but after survey done with my colleagues they said this is better.

iwantitvmuch,
Congrats! Remeber to be relaxed and be truthful. If not they will have problem writing yr report. Yr home visit will be arranged on the spot after the interview...they will ask u when both of u will be convenient for the next interview at yr home...be prepared with the date
Hmmm....looks like u don even need to wait for 2mths for the interview. Looks like u just need 2mths more mths to hv yr little one in yr arms...hehehe
 
yuli,
u take care of yr bb every nite yrself?
I more relax this week as my mum offer to help me take care on Tues and today...so happy...
Does yr girl still ask for milk during the nite? I so envy with my friend's girl who is 4 days younger than mine...her girl don ask for milk anymore and sleep thru the nite...asked my mum how to train her to quit nite milk but my mum insisted that bb should drink when they are hungry so that they can grow fatter. Sigh...i miss my sleep
happy.gif
 
iwantitvmuch,
wow.. so fast office interview, when u send the HSR? All the best to you...
Ahh... want to check w you, you'll be attending the disclosure workshop on 15th Oct?
Today touch mentioned to us we need to attend, we'll be seeing each other there soon... hehe...

Blesswbb,
haha.. as what dream mentioned, yr baby girl is like princess...

Dream,
wow.. so fast ur baby boy already a month, hope to see his photo soon...
 
BlesswBB, thank you for the information. Really, they will arrange home visit after the interview eh?? okay, we'll bring our diary along. I'm very happy leh.

SWEETCL05, I sent the HSR on the 25th of August.
Closer to the disclosure workshop, I will organise with you on how to recognise me at the workshop if you want to. hee hee.
 
blesswbb,
thanks for sharing and I think I will use the same than yours. Packaging is nice and price is reasonable. I agree with your mum that most people will discard the card. Do you think it is possible to give the box without any card. I am wondering whether I should ask for the personalised card and keep it for myself for souvenir. Yep, very greedy! Otherwise, in the website, there are some blue and pink boxes. Wondering whether the items to give are the same for bb girl and bb boy?

Iwangitvmuch
I guess they were much faster than expected. Really happy for you. You must be very excited.

Babylove 80
I guess you were right to change to touch. They seem very fast!
 
Iwantitvmuch,
Ya u be surprised it will end very fast. Before u realize it baby is in yr arms. Excited for u already. Don forget after the home visit start calling yr agent to look out baby for u, it will be faster. Cos by the time u receive yr HSR report baby should be on the way.
 
Dream,
Do u want them to deliver? If so don think they can separate the card & the item. They thing inside the box r the same except for the box they differentiate it by colors. If u try ordering online u should be able to see more of the personalize card. Hv u tried?
 
iwantitvmuch, so happeeeeee for you! Yes, like Blesswbb says, before you know it, bb will be in your arms! then you will understand why I keep saying sleep as much as you can NOW!!! becos Dream, blesswbb and I can tell you that sleep is now a LUXURY!!!

They will try to schedule their home vist about 2-3 weeks after your interview at their office. Yes, remember to call the agent of your choice after your home visit so your agent can start looking for you. After your home visit, you can always ask your assessor if he/she sees any problem/delay in approving your HSR. We asked that and they were very honest abt where they saw potential problems/delays so that at least, we can prepare ourselves or help them by getting documents to support our case (in our case it was medical rpts and statistics).

Be yourselves at the office interview. They are not out to fail you, they also want you to have a baby in your arms
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Happy, happy for you!

Blesswbb, I thank GOD I stay with my parents so my mum helps me on some weeknights. My husband is outstationed 3-4 days a week so I am soooo thankful I have my mum's help otherwise I peng-san faster!

Yes, my lil monster still wakes up for night feeds. I notice she seems to wake at about 3.30am each night. Her last feed is about 10+pm then she'll sleep all the way to 3.30am then drink then go back to sleep then wake at 5+am,d drink then smile and look very happy and wants to stretch and play and don't wana sleep. A few times she decided to play from 3.30 - 4.30am! That was siong. I don't know how to get her to go back to sleep when she doesnt want and is happier to play. I very scared when she smiles at me at 3 in the mornig cos I know that's the end of my sleep! With my mum, her pattern is the same! Please ask your friend her secret. I have also read of other mothers whose bb sleep for 7.5hrs at a stretch!

We now share the same PD! Yah, I'm very comfortable with Dr Yap. I also like the idea that he takes time to go on conference leave - I feel that upgrading/learning is very impt in their field. My dd's 5in1 is next week and that's it I think. I can't remember if the 5in1 is one time jab or it's split into 2times. I must check.

Dream - 1 mth already, hor?! so fast!
 
Yuli,
Looks like yr little girl start to play in the middle of the nite liao...so scary...my mum keep saying that bb tend to wake in the nite to play when they are 3mths then all our sleep will be gone....hehehe mine is a pig lor prefer to sleep than play lor even during the day
My friend secret is to make her bb bathe at 8-9pm together with her last feed and off she sleep till the next morning. So envy rite? Did u talk to yr bb when she wakes up at 3am? Try not to talk to her. My little girl wake at 4-5am to have her milk and i din make a single sound...quickily pat her back to sleep.
 
Yuli and Blesswbb,
Your girls night feeds are "paradise" compared to my 1.5-2h hour feed..without mentioning all the noise he makes at night as he is very uncomfortable...so, I can barely sleep at night... When does it get better?

Blesswbb,
I think would need them to deliver as the place is quite far from my place but minimum order is 200...
 
Blesswbb and Yuli,
I have another question! Wondering whether you have already bought insurance for your bbs and which one would you recommend. Thanks.
 
blesswbb, I m quiet as a mouse whenever she wakes for her night feeds. There are minimal lights and sound. I have nvr heard about this 'like to play in the middle of the night when they r 3 mths'! Now i'm scared - hahaha.

How often does your princess sleep in the afternoon? Mine sleeps about 2hrs in the morning, approx 1hr in the afternoon and maybe 0.5 to 1 hr in the early evening. What do you do during her awake time? I dunno if I'm engaging/interacting with her enough.

Dream, I think our bbies r slightly older, that's why so don't worry, it will get btr! btw, I forgot to reassure you that you were probably right abt the growth spurt. Apparently, their growth spurts are at 3wks, 6wks, 3mths and 6mths. Of cos that's just a gauge. How much does he drink per feed? and does he drink all his milk at each feed or just suckle for a bit then fall asleep? He's still very small. At 1mth, my dd was also doing 3 hr feeds. At about 5 weeks old, she suddenly gave us a 'present', she slept for 7hrs straight for 2 nights. Then after that, it was back to waking up every 3 hours
sad.gif
My gf reminded me that a bb's stomach is the size of his fist.....so tiny right? So that's why they need to drink more frequently. As for noise, my dd also makes a lot of funny noises during her sleep. Her sleep till about 3+am is very sound but after that, altho her eyes are closed, she makes noises. During her 1st 2 or 3 nights home, I jumped at every sound she made and peered at her to make sure she's ok (and each time her eyes are closed). Now, I don't jump and go to her. I wait until she is abt to cry then I know she needs milk
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Re: insurance. I also wanna get but guess we have to wait till our children's new BC is ready right?

Elle, looks like you might be the next to be called for interview!

So the ladies who have submitted HSRs are iwantitvmuch, elle and babylove, right? SweetclO5 also? Our group is expanding - how nice!
 
dream,
Did u try increasing the amount of milk? My girl drink abt 3oz milk by the time she's 1mth. This will help in extending the time. Try not to go to him whenever he makes noise. Like wat yuli did I try to wait till she's abt to cry. As for insurance we can't get her any till her new BC is here by Nov. But I know 1 that income has that provide for kids future education. U can call them to check.
 
Yuli,
you are right. I just called my insurance agent and he told me that he needed the legal adoption paper, birth certificate and marriage certificate. So, I guess that will give us more time to "hunt" around.

My bb boy still sleeps a lot, especially in the afternoon. It seems that he is the opposite of your girl. Stay wake for 1-2 hrs in the morning, 1/2 hr in the afternoon and 1-2 hrs in the evening! but, I guess this is normal as he is still very young and needs lots of sleep to grow. Seems like bbs are developing/changing very fast. I guess both you and Blesswbb are "1.5-2 months" my senior! but it really makes lots of difference. Yes, I still jump at every noise he makes at night...

About growth spurt, he may be going through his 3wks spurt then! He drinks about 2 ounces per feed. That's quite little but he drinks very frequently. I think his stomach can't take much so he drinks very little but very frequently. Sometimes, every 1.5 hr!

I hope my bb will be able to sleep a lot more when I go back to work. I am a bit apprehensive about this. How are you coping with work? Must be tough to juggle both. You have a helper to help out your parents during the day when you are at work?

My mother will be coming for one month to help out when I go back to work. Then after, I will need to depend solely on my helper. Will also take my annual leave after that...sigh...really no mood to work...envy Blesswbb! SAHM....
 
Yuli,
Haha that's wat my mum told me. But look like yrs started already so u shouldn't fear anymore. I'm more worried hehe
My girl sleeps alot. She sleep twice in the morning for at least 3hrs. Then sleep a few times in the afternoon which are short naps. In the evening she sleep once for 0.5hrs.
We try making her talk sometimes bring her for a walk in the evening. I very kiasu now teaching her 123 haha
 
blesswbb,
thanks for advise. I think will increase his dose to 3 ounces. He is so unpredictable and trying not to waste too much milk! Just now, it was so hard to get him to sleep. Not really sure why he kept crying. It is really a guessing game at times. At night, I usually don't talk to him as I am a zombie!

Otherwise, can't imagine you are really teaching her 123!

You are right, order is minimum sgd200. Need to order fast as they usually require 7 days prior notice. Their website is interesting and the personalised cards are pretty nice too and that s why I wanted to keep them for myself!
 
Hello ladies

It's been ages since I logged in. I've been so busy with my assignments and stuff. Well, I finally submitted my HSR to TOUCH yesterday and now the waiting starts!

There are more new people here. Hello to Babylove80,SWEETCL105 and Elle. I hope I've not missed anyone else.

Congratulations iwantitvmuch! So happy for you! You are one stop closer!

BlessBB, Dream, Yuli, I'm waiting to have sleepless nights too.

I'll be going on a holiday to Melbourne tomorrow. We haven't been on a holiday for 5 years because of all the IVF treatments. We thought we should go now before the baby arrives.

I'll catch up with you when I return a week later. All the best to everyone.
 
Iwantitvmuch,
ok,hehe.. see u at the disclosure talk...
seems like ur bb will be in your arms very soon.

Elle, will u be also going to the disclosure talk
 
Janella,

Congrats on ur submission. Do enjoy ur holiday!

Ladies,
I very kaypoh, been keeping track of when u all submit ur hsr so dat I can see wats the time period between until u have baby in ur arms.. so I know sweetclo5 submitted on 7/9, Elle lim on 1/9, Babylove on 16/9 n now Janella on 18/9...heeheehee

BTW, I started my new job, last 3 days was on attachment and next week will start at my new branch. So funny that as I m starting on a new job I cant help thinking that I will quit before end of next year so that I can adopt a baby boy n stay at home for a while. Am I weird or wat?? ;)

I enjoy reading abt ur babies n ur learning process in caring for them..sort of a mental preparation for me when I have my own..tks ladies
 
Hi blesswbb/Yuli/Dream
would like to find out for home interview, my parents and hubby's parents all need to be at our house during that time?
 
SWEETCL05,
It depends. For my case, as we just lost my brother just early this year the officer in charge wanted to talk to my mum as she will be the next care taker for my bb. They wanted to know how my mum taking my brother death. Thanks to her she had performed very well for my sake in front of the officer. So if u do not have special case i don think they are required to be around.
 
dream,
Did u check whether is it due to colic? It must be painful for him that is y he has been crying. If not, did u try giving him another oz of milk? My little girl cried that way before, I tried release her discomfort thinking is colic but end up is she wanted more milk. That was before she was 1mth old.
hehe...teaching her 123 is bcos she wants sound especially when pple is around. So just take the opportunity to teach her 123 lor. Seems like she enjoy listening to me telling her.
So when is yr boy 1mth old? Do u intend to celebrate? Or u just giving cakes?
Ya i also think the website is interesting. The food are very tasty too. Do u know when i ordered for my ex colleagues i also order 2 for myself just to have a taste and to keep the card.
happy.gif
 
Janella,
U should relax and enjoy yrself now. After this it will be no holiday till ????
Although i have 3 holiday trips this year before bb is here i still miss them very badly. As i wont have the chance now till bb is at least 1yr old.
So ENJOY as much as possible....
 
Janella,
Congrats on your submission and enjoy your well deserved break! I heard Melbourne is a very nice place and I am sure you will have lots of fun.

Die,
NIce to hear from you and now, we know who to get the statistics from! Glad you enjoy our bb chat and looking forward to share some tips with you next year!

Sweetcl05
Sorry, can't help you as did not go thru HSR.

Blesswbb,
I am not really sure why he cried that day. But yesterday night, he slept without any problem but was quite cranky during the day. I guess bbs also have their moods
happy.gif
Thanks for your tip on the milk. I wonder why their appetite change so much as their days are quite similar!

Otherwise, managed to order from Sweetmoments. Thanks again for the recommendation. Will just be giving cakes and like you, have ordered extra for ourselves!
 
Hi All,

I am new here, I have just failed another round of ivf and am exploring adoption as an option. My hubby and I have a pounding question. How do you ladies handle ppl queries and gossips abt the new adopted child.
 
Hi Leobaby,

Welcome ;) I tink jus tell pple the truth lor..nothing to hide..but only if they ask. Its only at the beginning dat pple will ask la, aft that shld be ok alrdy..maybe the experienced ladies can advise better ?

Dream,
How come u didnt need to go thru HSR?
 
Hi Leobaby,
I think you learn as you go along on answering pple queries. Gossips we can't stop. I think once we have the baby in our hands, we will care less. But to be adopting, we must be strong and shouldn't be easily affected by others so far.

I do have a query now to the experience mothers.
On maids. If I engage a maid now. She will know that my baby is adopted. As maids can be quite rebellious, I'm worried that they might tell the kid before I tell them. How do you calm your nerves on that?? Any thoughts?
 
Leobaby,
Just 1 question for u....ask yourself are u ready for adoption? If you are ready...do u care what pple think? What's in yr mind is the child is mind. I did not tell anyone in my office, friends or relatives except my parents regarding the adoption. When the day my bb is in my arms, i publish the news in Facebook. Guess what? Everyone is surprised and i have everyone blessing. Look at the positive side u be surprised at how pple think abt adoption.
 
iwantitvmuch,
Do u think is right to engage a maid now? Why not wait till u go thru all the interviews 1st? To my experience engaging a maid needs to wait for just 2weeks to have the maid in yr home. Wait till u have yr HSR report approved then as u waiting for yr bb u start looking for a maid. Does yr company gives adoption leave? If it does, u should have enough time to engage a maid and train her during yr adoption leave. In fact, u can also tell the maid agency yr require date u want the maid to arrive at your home.
 
dream,
ya bb do hv mood. U know wat? I'm also very surprised today that my little girl cries for milk. It is the 1st time since 1mth ago. She even drink 5oz to my surprise...i'm so happy. Hope this will go on if not my mood will be rollercoaster...hehehe
Oh ya...he will still ask for more after a week...so just monitor...if u notice he does not vomit out any milk or will cry after every feed u can consider giving him another 0.5oz. Try to increase 0.5oz everytime so that his stomach will not feel uncomfortable.
 
BlesswBB, like you said, I agree that I shouldn't engage the maid now. Not until we are done with the interviews and gotten the approval. since I have 2 months of adoption leave.
Okay then, I will wait for the baby to come before engaging the maid.
Thanks for your advice!!
 
iwantitvmuch,
Since u hv 2mth adoption leave, u should take a month to build the bond with yr bb. Once the 2mths adoption leave is over i don think u will have time since u will be working. Do u know that i still afraid that i don give enough love to my little girl till now. I'm so worried she doesnt feel the love i give it to her. My hubby keep reminding me to give each other time but i stil worried.
 
blesswbb,
great news about the milk! Seems like our mood is controlled by bb mood. Yesterday, really worried and I think that was really his first colic! I think last time was just stomach discomfort. He could not stop crying although we tried everything. Really scary. Don't know what triggered it and don't know when will be thenext colic!

Iwantitvmuch
I guess your issue has been resolved! Would you have anybody helping you the first month? As it is your first baby, it is better to have your parents or in laws help out?

Leobaby
agree with you that our society is not as open/modern as in the west and instead of being proud of adoption, we tend to hide it because of other people's comments/views. But I think the society is changing for the better. So try not to worry too much on it and concentrate on the joy of motherhood instead.
 


Ladies,

I tink hor..forget abt the worry of pple's gossip abt the adopted baby, for all u know..most pple will be so delighted for us! Who can reject a cute baby, rite?

Blesswbb,
I can imagine ur joy when u publish the news of ur baby on facebook. I too wish for that happy occasion soon..;)
 
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