Child Adoption

dream,
ya...i'm actually reading a book called "new babycare" it actually tells me when to look out for what at different stage....i find it quite a gd book. It also tells the development of the baby from 0mth to 3yrs old.
 


Blesswbb,
I also like to read internet as they have weekly development for bb. But sometimes, a bit too western! Ok, will learn from you! my experience too rusty!
 
Thanks! I really hope that I can progress to the next steps soon. But I hope I can hold on to my anxiety. I'm glad to be over the phase where I was anxious when I was trying for the baby. I do not want to be anxious anymore.

On calling the agencies, BlesswBB, can you all PM me the agencies which I can check? Please PM me Alice's number and Joyful agencies. Thank you.

Janella,
let me know if you need any help in filling the forms. All the best.

Dream,
will be praying for your baby to arrive safe and sound and SOON.
 
iwantitvmuch,
Thanks for praying for me. I really hope bb will arrive SOON too! About the anxiety, what keeps me going is that I know I will have a bb at the end of the process. So, just concentrate on this and you will be fine. From my experience, I gathered that we can't control the timing and every person has different experience. So, what is important to remember is that things happen for a reason and bb will find its way on its own time.

And of course, we are there to support you along the way
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iwantitvmuch, so happeeee 4 u dat yr forms r submitted! Now gotta wait ;( but once interviews start, it'll move quickly.

Blesswbb, yr bb very cute la. I like the stoned look in her daddy's arms. She got so much hair, so nice! My bb got very little hair ;( i'm glad she's adjusting well 2 her new milk powder. Wat is her poo like? Is it yi tiao, yi tiao or soft? mine's soft n greenish brown. My mum say like kaya! but smelly kaya!

I also wana show u ladies pix of my bb but i got no blog & I'm 2 lazy 2 start one, hahaha! If i post here, it'll take up 2 much space.

Die, i first met my bb wen she was 14days old. I brot her home wen she was 20days old. It has been 28 days since we welcomed her into our hearts n lives n everyone absolutely adores her! I was really touched n encouraged by how our relatives n church frens hv welcomed her so warmly n hv been doting on her.

We were prepared 2 adopt a girl under 24mths. We didnt noe it at the time we engaged Alice that she only brings in newborns. I'm glad 4 this experience with my daughter cos I may nvr hv my own biological child so itz nice 2 noe/learn/experience caring 4 a newborn. Also like blesswbb says, older bbies mau hv separation anxiety issues.

Hving said that, if we hv the energy 4 another child, we may adopt an older child (1yr) cos they r usually the ones that cant get adopted out. Dunno if we will hv the courage tho cos it comes with its share of issues.

oh ya, blesswbb, all the best with hse hunting n decorating n moving. So many new chapters in yr life this year - fantastic!
 
Yuli,
So nice to hear of you and how your princess has charmed all your relatives and friends. Agree that Blesswbb is really hard working to create and updte her blog. I am also the lazy one...

I like your mum's description about her poo! i never imagined it that way but thinking of it, I don't feel like having Kaya for a while!!!

I guess you are enjoying SAHM. 28 days, already! Seems like it was yesterday!
 
Yuli,
I'm still monitoring her poos...hoping it will not cause any upset stomach again. Previously, she took Friso and Similac the poos is like watery. She can poos more than 4times a day. Now after taking Nan1 she's better just like wat u said...yi tiao yi tiao and only once. Her poos colors depend sometimes can be greenie sometimes yellowish...according to my mum she said if greenie means she must be frighten by some sound or things. My little girl very xiao tan always can scare of little sound when she's asleep. I have been trying to put on loud music for her so that she will not always scare but she still cry lor...sigh...
So nice if u ladies can create blog so that we can share our babies growing...only mine so boring rite..hehehe
Yuli good suggestion...next adoption should look for older child so that don hv to burn our sleep haha...should tell my hubby abt it.
oh ya...don we sound very disgusting talking abt our bb poos here...hahaha
 
Dear covenant_123, looks like you are the other person, like me, who is not submitting HSR through Touch. I did contemplated to submit my HSR through SBL Vision as it's nearer to my home but was told by MCYS that Fei Yue's queue is shorter, like 1 mth so I hand-delivered my forms to Fei Yue on 28 July 2009. I also din use Touch as Touch told me that their queue is very long, about 2~3mths and from this forum, I see that Touch has more requirements on attending mandatory workshops conducted by them. Not sure if this is their way of making money indirectly. Now I wish I had submitted my forms to SBL as it's almost a month and I have not heard a squeek from Fei Yue. ;-(
 
GREAT NEWS TO SHARE!
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I think I have been dreaming of writing this and now I finally can! Baby is at home with me! Alice called me last night and my bundle of joy is here! And I fell in love right away with him! Same for hubby and my daughter. We are all so happy that our little boy is here...Went for medical this morning and waiting anxiously for BT results. Other tests were all ok. Can't believe that this day has finally come and our family is complete. Looking back, bb was the one choosing us! He took him a while to come but it could never have been better.

Wish2bmum, I understand how you feel. It is lots of waiting but it is all worth it! Just concentrate on the end result, ok...
 
dream,
Congrats!!! I very happy for u...finally...
How old is yr bb? He must b very charming in order to attract all of u...hehehe
Hope to see yr bb pic soon.
 
wish2bmum,
I understand FeiYue is also long queue. My friend who is still filling up the HSR forms check with Fei Yue...they told her will need to wait for at least 1-2mths for her queue. Mayb u can call Fei Yue to check with Constance on yr status. I went thru Fei Yue but i din wait...they called me for my 1st interview 2weeks after i submitted my HSR forms. Btw, attending workshop is a mandatory by MCYS and not by the service centre. I attended "Disclosure Talk" and is manatory for Fei Yue.
 
Dream

Congratulations! I am so so happy for you!! Finally, your wait is over! How old is the baby? And how is your family taking to him?

BlesswBB

I keep looking at your blog! Your baby is really very pretty! She's going to be very popular with boys when she grows up! Ha! Ha!

Iwantitvmuch

Congratulations too for finally submitting the forms. And thanks for your offer to help! I plan to submit the forms in mid September cos my husband is going overseas.

Wish2bmum

I am kind of disappointed hearing about the long queues at TOUCH and it certainly doesn't help that I am so slow as well! Are you planning on giving Fei Yue a tinkle to find out about the status of your application?
 
Dream!!
wow! did Alice plan for this baby or she just received the baby last night?! what a nice surprise hor?? I"M SO HAPPPPY for you!! so amazing leh.

I'm hearing about long queue. Is it really long queue? To me, 1-2 months not so bad right?? But they should at least call, then leaving anyone to just wait. I heard that Touch is very efficient.

Yuli, you handed your forms to Touch? A show of hands on who handed their forms to Touch?
 
Dream!!!!! I am sooooooooooo happy for you! The wait was long but then you literally became a mummy (for the 2nd time) overnight! Quick post a pic of your bb. I'm really very happy for you. It must be a relief and a joy and.....indescribable lah!

Wish2bmum, maybe give Fei Yue a call and see if you can ask them to let you know the status? I find that the assessors are all really nice and want to help us but just that they have many couples like us in the queue. Regarding workshops, like Blesswbb says, the Disclosure Talk is mandatory by MCYS - the other workshops are optional. All the best, hope they call you quickly!!

Blesswbb, heh heh, I finally saw the video of your bb 'talking' to you. So funny! She quite good leh, tahan her hunger and let you 'torture' her with the video taking. Mine will cry loudly if we don't give her milk FAST! My mum says when she cries loudly, her mouth becomes a square! becos open so big!

My bb is now pooing only every other day and today it's sticky and yellowish, like mustard! haha, Dream is gonna kill me. When I said it looks like kaya, she said she won't eat kaya for a while, now maybe she won't have mustard on her hotdogs for a while!

When my bb was on Friso, her poo was yi tiao but since on Similac, it's sticky. Hope that's okay.
 
Janella,
Talk abt boys...i'm starting to worry abt it liao...funny thing when we r parents huh? I even warn her now...haha...knowing she don even understand me.

Yuli,
My bb don really like to drink milk...so even when milk time she will only make sound. She wont cry unless she wants to sleep. To her sleeping is more important.
Base on her description sound like yr bb is getting fatter for a milk lover...haha...my bb don look fat but she's getting taller. She looks like a 3mths old bb now.
Don worry...its normal to have sticky yellowish poos...mine after taking Nan1 her poos are the same like yr bb's poos.
Haha...poor Dream...every food we describe on our bb's poos she will ban the food...

Dream,

Think u will be busy these few days...don worry abt yr bb...we r here to help...
 
Dream,

Congrats! I read fr previous post that u had just failed IVF in May and now, 3 mths later u have a beautiful baby through adoption! I am so inspired.

Keep us updated on ur first experiences with ur new baby, ok mummy ;)
 
true, like Die said. It's amazing. the failure from the IVF is unbearable. Sometimes, being a mother seems like a distance dream for me. With all of the mothers who have received their babies, I still think that it is a miracle. For me, I am still not confident until it's my turn to receive my baby!! Oh, now that Dream has received her baby, it's down to me before we can meet up??!! Do you all want to go ahead and meet first ?? I will take a while since I've just submitted my forms on Tuesday.....
 
Hi Ladies,
Agree that it is really a miracle and can't believe that my bb boy is with us now! I really think fate brought him to us! BB is today 4 days old! I could not believe it when Alice told me about him. He is 2.8 kg so still quite fragile. Alice showed us how to bath and swaddle him. But he still wakes up every 2-3 hours for milk. So, last night, he had his milk at 11pm, 2am, 5 am and 8 am!

So, ladies, please persevere! Miracles DO happen
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Blesswbb and Yuli,
Don't worry about the poo description! Now, I think I can join you in the discussion! poo keeps changing and very frequent...but I am not as good as both of you in the description!

my bb now drinks about 1.5-2 ounces. Is that normal and feeding is about every 2.5-3 hours?
 
Blesswbb and Yuli,
Wanted to ask you whether you put cream for diaper change and which cream. So far, I just cleaned with water.
 
Dream, hellooooo! Didn't think we'd hear from you for a while! Wow, bb is only 4 days old! That's amazing! You got him really young which is great!

I use Desitin diaper cream. When bb first came to us, she had some diaper rash so I put cream with each diaper change but now she's btr so I only put on a few of the changes. Since your boy is so young, probably no rash yet? Regarding drinking, my bb was 3 weeks when she came home to us and she was drinking 3oz - 3.5oz. The PD told me that it's ok/normal if bb feeds every 2.5/3hrs but if bb wants more before the 2.5hr mark, then it probably means he's still hungry and you can give him more. If he continually cries for more milk after a feed, then you can increase from 2oz to 2.5oz. I hope you understand what I mean. Did Alice take care of him at all, as in did he stay with her? Cos if she took care of him then she can share with you what his night-time routine was like, what he likes/dislikes etc.

iwantitvmuch, donch worry la. We wait for you! Dream's bb too young to go out now also! heh heh!
 
yuli,
bb is sleeping now and daughter in school so i have time to come here! so far, no diaper rash but just trying to prevent it...very kiasu! so, no need to put cream if no rash, right?

i see what you mean for the milk. actually, bb drinking between 1.5 to 2 ounces, so I prepare 2. Usually, he will stop halfway as too tired and then, will drink the second half 10-15 minutes later. Agree that Alice is very experienced. She asked me to use another teat as she feels the existing one is too tiring/slow for him..

iwantitvmuch,
yep, bb very young now and don't dare to bring him anywhere with h1n1...although i already bought his car seat! so, don't worry. will wait for you.
 
Dream,

Dont mind me asking,u haven got baby's dependent pass yet can bring home alrdy? Is there any chances that the dependent pass/such paperwork arrangements can fail to follow through? Has baby gone for all the medical check ups?

I have this fear that what if I have the baby in my arms at home for a few days then for some reason need to return!!? I will be devastated! Sorry if Ive upset anybody here..but can such things ever happen? Its a real fear for me cuz really, I have been through enough disappointments.. can anyone advice?

My fren said that there is no governing authority in Malaysia over adoption and the babies could be kidnapped for sale and if anything happens we may need to return the baby. Is there any truth in wat she said? She is a Malaysian.

Again, ladies, sorry if I upset anybody here but these r my real fears n I hope someone can address these issues and reassure me that it is safe. My poor heart cannot take any more disappointments. Thanks.
 
Again,sorry if I offended anyone with my earlier post..Wat my fren said to me upset me n made me think scary n negative thots.
 
I certainly hope that there's no one will be so evil as to kidnap peoples' baby. Also, baby is usually in the hospital at such a young age(eg. 4 days old for Dream's case) or close to the mom. There are very very very little chance that they are kidnapped, as if they are left alone in a park or shopping centre or wherever.
A relative adopted a boy from Malaysia and met the baby's mother and even brought her for checkup. So, I'm sure there are many cases of mothers who are not ready for a child and want to give them up for adoption.

But die, the question on dependent pass is a good question. I don't understand where the dependent pass has to be issued, from Singapore or Malaysia.

Don't worry, no question is bad question.
 
Hi Dreams,
Congrats! I'm very for you!!

I'm worried now that i should have submit the HSR Report early. Today, we've finally went for medical checkup. HOpe that touch won't take so long to approve our HSR Reports cos I'm getting more and more desperate to have bb in my hands,hehe... can imagine the feelings of joy!!!
 
Blesswbb,

Saw ur blog, your bb really very cute & pretty. The pix she's sleeping in ur hubby's arm, so comfortable....even comfortable on the bed, haha...

Yuli, any new photos of ur baby girl...
 
hi ladies,
Been missing for 2 days...busy with my little girl and hubby just came back from overseas.

Dream,
Wow...bb only 4 days old...very fragile...always look out of his neck ya...
I'm using same brand as Yuli. Tot Alice will recommend some bb products to u. As for me. I'm using the cream after every bathe to prevent the rash. Cos i understand it can b painful when there is diaper rash. Anyway it depend on individual some pple prefer to use bb lotion when there is no rash. U can try that too.
U make me recall when my bb just arrive...the nite are very torturing....every 2hrs feed can b very tiring...anyone helping u?

Die,
Dont worry...if u using Lotus...she going thru all legal ways....she has alot of lobang. As for half way thru the bb will be taken away...that is also not possible. Dependent pass will be given to u when yr HSR report is approved. Without the HSR report nothing can be processed further. That is y most adoption centre will ask u whether u hv yr HSR report. Pls don listen to pple who has no experience in adoption. For information on adoption u r always free to ask here. Hope u doubt and worries are cleared now.

SWEETCL05,
Thanks...din kno alot of pple here keep track on my little girl hehee....will post more photos if i have the chance. Don worry yr turn will come soon...
 
Ladies,

Thanks for ur assurance. U r right..I shouldnt listen to pple who dont have experience in adoption. So how long after HSR approved we can get the Dependents pass?

What is the minimum combined income for adopter parents?
 
Hello all,

wow , there are lots of new posting. Congrats to Dream. Welcome to motherhood. Hope to hear more good news My son just turn one and was having problem with his teething ( with 4 tooth upper gum all at the same time! ) poor child, he must be in great pain.

Well, I would like to join the gathering if there is any. Keep me posted. Thanks.
 
Ladies,

After your baby arrived, how long did u take to return to work? Sorry..so many questions..but I really have no one else to ask..
 
Please let me know if theres any gathering..I would love to meet up w u ladies to find out more abt adoption. Although I only plan to have a baby at home by end of next year as I need to save up for a more comfortable life when baby arrives, I am a person who plans v. much ahead. It will be great to have a support grp like u ladies. Thanks.
 
Hi,
sorry did not post for a while (compared to before!) as busy at home with the little one. Things are very hectic at home right now!

For adoption leave, you d better check with ur HR. Although mcys said 1 month, there are quite a lot of things to fulfill so may not be entitled. I am still checking with my company. Read earlier thread. Some info on this was posted. Some "sister" entitled to 2 months!
 
Hi ladies,

glad that I found this forum, I have some quiries that I need help mwith regarding the HSR. Hope you can help me.
 
Actually I hv just had a failed IVF cycle in June and have hence given up hope about having my own child/children. Cos I am already 37, I am worried about having a baby at this age. Hence, we have decided to turn to adoption.

In fact, beside ourselves we also have another friend who is also interested. After reading the thread, most of you ladies seems to have a good help from Alice, the agent from Lotus.

My quiry is: The health checkup that is required by HSR, how thorough is it? Pls help us, thx!
 
Blessedwbb,

Can I check with you. If there is someone in Singapore who is willing to pass over (of course with some cost) a baby after birth, what would be the procedure? Do we still have to go through MCYS or just get a lawyer to certify the process of registrating the baby legally as our own as well as the health check? If not will MCYS complete the proceure with us, though the baby is not 'found' by them? Just curious.

Can I check if Alice as mentioned in the forum is from Touch Community? If not which agency is she from? Any further details? Thanks.

I am cycle buddy from the IVF with Nicole, Die, and fatbabe...
 
Nicole,

Health check is required for your HSR. There is a criminal check as well , a home visit and an interview. Once you completed all the paperwork, the rest is like a walk in the park. you just have to wait for the approval from MCYS...

I think most of us had been thru' IVF . If I have to do things all over again. I would adopt first, then go for my IVF. That's way, I will not feel so stress about having a baby when I already adopted one... just think out loud!
 
Die,
After the approval and with the baby with you, u can apply straight directly to MCYS for dependent pass. It takes abt 2weeks to receive the letter from MCYS for u to fix a appt with them. On the day of the appt u can need to pay $30 to collect the dependent pass. As for the adoption leave, it depends on individual company. MCYS only give 1mth.
 
I think we still waiting for another new baby to come from iwantitvmuch to start the gathering. As dream is still coping with her new life.
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humbug,
I can't help u with yr qn as i went thru a agency to get my adoption done. I understand from a friend of mine who have went thru an adoption direct thru the parents...and i understand the cost are much much expensive. She paid abt $40k for a boy. If baby is not thru MCYS u just need to get a lawyer to get the procedure done for u.
Alice is from LOtus Child adoption. U can check her details on this website
http://www.lotusadoption.com/index.html

I know u ladies as i was there during my March 09 when my 2nd IVF failed.
 
hi all,
we have taken our first step. Send the HSR last evening...Cross fingers all's well.
May i know if anyone can let me know what are the questions to interviewers will ask and if our home has to be child friendly. Appreciate any tips given. Many thanks in advance and have a beautiful day ^_^
 
elle lim
if i still can remember they ask qn more on relationship btw both u and hubby. They r also concern who will look after the bb when u work. Home visit will look into yr home whether is child friendly environment. Don worry too much on what they going to ask just tell the truth.
Good luck!!
 
Hey Elle, where did you submit the HSR to?? I'm trying to monitor the waiting time.

BlesswBB, I'm still going to continue working when bb is here. So, what kind of answers are the best?? I know that my mother-in-law will help to jaga(look after) the baby lah . Does it help? and we are also hiring a help so that my mother in law will not tire herself. is it good enough??
 
Hi Die/Humbug,

ya I have given up hope on IVF after the failed cycle. Actually I have not been very keen to try IVF from the start bcoz of the emotional pain that we have to go thru. It really was very traumatic for me. But was convinced by my aunt and a good fren to give it a try.

Ever since we found out we have difficulty in conceiving, I have always wanted to adopt but it has taken me so long to finally decide to come here.

AH,

thx for ur answer. I am aware about the home interview and the rest but what about the checkup? What does the doc do to vertify?
 
wah, so many new frens! Hello, welcome! So happy 2 meet more prospective adoptive mums!

Nicole:Medical Chkup - there is a form included in the HSR pack which detais wat the dr nds 2 Chk u 4, eg; protein in urine, choloesterol, Blood count, etc, quite basic normal stuff.

Elle: Interview & Home Study- i did my HSR thru TOUCH, they'll ask qns similar 2 qns in the HSR. They will ask qns like how u resolve conflict with yr husband, how u intend 2 discipline yr child, who will b the main caregiver for bb. Answer qns @ yr interview similar 2 how u answered in yr HSR so there's consistency. The assesors aren't out 2 fail us, they're juz doing their job n lookg out for the interest of the adopted child.

Humbug:I think there's no nd 4 HSR if itz local adoption. Itz not easy getting local babies so if u hv lobang, that's grt! I thot it'll b cheaper than foreign adoption but I guess fr wat Blesswbb says, it may not be. Juz b mindful tht itz illegal 2 b seen like u r buying a child. U can help 2 pay 4 medical Chkups, delivery etc 4 birth mum tho. I wld suggest speak 2 a lawyer familar with adoption n get advice? Hope this helps.
 


Hi Yuli,

Thank you for the answer. I am still in the midst of exploration as I am still recovering from my last IVF which only happened less then a month ago.. body still weak. Need to recuperate before we move forward. We are just exploring some options. Thanks for all the info.
 

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