Am I supposed to feel like this??

[Joycejoyce]

Hello, I'm not sure if this is the correct place to post but i'll just give it a go ..

Can I know if anybody feels the same way as me??

My baby is now 6+ months old. I feel paranoid whenever my mother in law carry him. Bro in law or other relatives I'm surprisingly ok.

My mother in law used to snatch the baby away from me, even when the baby is sleeping in my arms. She didn't ask for permission or what .. She likes to tell my baby "don't always look at your mother, look at me/daddy. Look at your mother for what." Whenever she carries bb, she'll walk so far away that I can't see or hear bb. Whenever bb cries, she'll say "ah, I know u want ma ma(referring to herself)" and hog the baby even when he's crying non stop. I only get to touch and hold my bb when he's going to nap/change diaper/feed.

I can't tell my hub, he don't understand. He will just say that I'm crazy. I'm starting to suspect if I'm indeed sick. I thought of going to a doc but I dunno what to say also.

I'm starting to regret that I agree to have a baby when these weren't agreed on initially.

I'm really trying hard to learn how to let go but it's just so difficult for me when it comes to that.

 

[furbee]

Are u staying with ur in law? Is ur bb their first grandchild? Are u working or SAHM?

Actually its common to feel moody, depressed or post natal blue, or watsoever emotions tat u are feeling. Actually its even great that u share out instead of bottling up within. Yes, ur hubby may not understand, or feel u are making a big issue out of a tiny weeny self-problem. But thats wat u r feeling now.
I been thru tat, thou not so serious...cos my in law dont dare say nasty stuff. But they too hog baby, mumble stuff to bb, sometimes i aso think mus be saying 'ugly stuff'.. Lol. But after having 2kids, n looking back, actually its jus the way they trying to reconnect... Reconnect their past feelings n bonding, as thou grandkid is their OWN son/daughter, rekindling the emotions that they may have or even missed out on... Some older parents didnt see how their kids grow up, or even forget their baby innocent angel face.

I know some in law are hard to get along, i cant comment much, but to me i live with it. Of cos staying with own parents better, but if not given tat chance, at least treat it as a helping hand?? Duno if it works, or maybe go out n relax, shop abit to unwind..seeing them with bb may bring u some discomfort, but i feel mayb things may change.

Lastly, try to talk to ur hubby. But dont go straight to the topic n pinpoint the unhappines that u feel. Instead share how u handle ur emotions, how u take care of ur kid, how happy u are, n not make it seems Stuck in btw of his parent n you. Men hate it the most, cos they shldnt take sides, but they too dont wan to 'offend' his parent or wife. In the end, have to mitigate, n talk to ur in law nicely... Hope things work out fine for u. Jiayou! Here is where u can pour out everything

 

[Joycejoyce]

I'm working full time. I'll only reach home around 7.30pm if not 7.15pm the earliest. Bb sleeps at 8.30pm. So after cooking dinner, I'm only left with 30 - 45 mins to play with bb. I don't get to spend much time with bb and I get angry at things/people that try to take my already very limited time with baby away.

I'm really trying hard to learn to let go but sometimes it pains me. I feel like they only want the baby and not the adult.

 

[pixie ng]

I guess you need to voice out to your husband.. If not, who else can help you? Just tell him that you want to spend time with your baby afterall you are working mother and only have 1 hour with your baby during weekdays.

 

[egg_factory]

They are taking you for granted. Stand up for yourself and be assertive towards your MIL or forever be bullied.

 

[nvidia]

Pls don't think that u are sick or crazy. It's pretty normal to feel anxious and scare of losing the connection and bonding with the bb.
Are u staying with u mil and she is the caregiver? How is your relationship with her? i believe these factor would affect how u feel.

Tell your hubby that u want to spend time with your bb without any disturbance with the limited time u have. If possible spend time with your hubby n bb together with the 3 of you as a family.