coffeedrinker
Member
Hi,
Need suggestion..
How to settle my maid lunch & dinner if I don't cook ?
Need suggestion..
How to settle my maid lunch & dinner if I don't cook ?
Advise on Baby & Maid Exps
- Thread starter erkerk
- Start date
coffeedrinker
Member
allow her to cook what?
only one dish per meal?
only one dish per meal?
coffeedrinker
Member
My baby only sleep 1.5 hour in the morning and afternoon 1.5 hour and evening 1.5 hour.. how can we get her to do housework, while she cook herself and also cook my baby 9months food ?
don't know how to handle this..
don't know how to handle this..
My maid batch cook her meat dish, enough for a few days at one go. For example, she may cook one pot of curry chicken and put in the fridge. She will take one portion out and heat up in the microwave oven to eat. If she wants vegetables she will cook just before she eats, usually just buy putting in boiling water and mix with her meat dish. This is her own initiative, I don't have to teach her.
For rice she cooks once in the morning, enough for 2 meals.
If your maid wants to cook everyday, you can ask her to cook once in the morning, enough for 2 meals.
My mother does the same thing too when she cooks her own food.
For rice she cooks once in the morning, enough for 2 meals.
If your maid wants to cook everyday, you can ask her to cook once in the morning, enough for 2 meals.
My mother does the same thing too when she cooks her own food.
My maid used to take care of 2 very young children and a baby all by herself, and still cook for the whole family, clean the house and wash clothes.
A competent maid must at least be able to take care of one baby and cook for herself. All the SAHMs are doing that, why should a maid be any different ? Personally I will not keep an incompetent maid, I will send her back and get a more experienced one.
A competent maid must at least be able to take care of one baby and cook for herself. All the SAHMs are doing that, why should a maid be any different ? Personally I will not keep an incompetent maid, I will send her back and get a more experienced one.
Coffeedrinker, my maid is allowed to cook 1 meat dish and 1 vege dish if she is cooking for herself. When she cooks for the family, she will cook 1 seafood dish and soup, which she will also get to eat.
Cooking for baby wise, I myself use short cut methods cos there are 3 of them here. Boiled foods I use the thermo pot, in which the food cooks on its own without supervision. Steamed foods we have electronic steamer with timer, so there is no need for supervision either.
Housework is done quickly early in the morning before the kids wake up
Cooking for baby wise, I myself use short cut methods cos there are 3 of them here. Boiled foods I use the thermo pot, in which the food cooks on its own without supervision. Steamed foods we have electronic steamer with timer, so there is no need for supervision either.
Housework is done quickly early in the morning before the kids wake up
coffeedrinker
Member
I don't like my maid. She getting more and more bold. She cook badly, not good at housework (not clean), forgetful, don't follow my way of doing things (i teach her my way, but she don't follow).
I told her off this evening that she should not be lazy on taking care of baby.. she just sit on the floor and see my baby walking on walker. She then ask me when she will finish her loan.. I say why? you want to leave ? I smile and say fine.. It August that you will finish loan.. then I let you go..
So angry..
she watch TV when I at work (I have webcam).. when I call she slowly walk over and pick up calls that the rings just cut off and I need to call 2nd time.
2 days ago I decided not to let my 9 mth old baby on walker.. so she just caryy her the whole afternoon.. so lazy to train her on floor.
I cater dinner for her as she don't have time to cook (she say)
Althought she is good at baby care like diaper changing , feeding, talking to her..
should I let her if she change her mind and say want to stay..
I told her off this evening that she should not be lazy on taking care of baby.. she just sit on the floor and see my baby walking on walker. She then ask me when she will finish her loan.. I say why? you want to leave ? I smile and say fine.. It August that you will finish loan.. then I let you go..
So angry..
she watch TV when I at work (I have webcam).. when I call she slowly walk over and pick up calls that the rings just cut off and I need to call 2nd time.
2 days ago I decided not to let my 9 mth old baby on walker.. so she just caryy her the whole afternoon.. so lazy to train her on floor.
I cater dinner for her as she don't have time to cook (she say)
Althought she is good at baby care like diaper changing , feeding, talking to her..
should I let her if she change her mind and say want to stay..
yippee_ya_ya
Member
Coffeedrinker
your maid is indeed bold. Why dun u ask her if she wants to leave NOW?
Btw, I need advice here re my Indo maid. From Day 1 she came to work for me, in front of the agent, we told her if her family wants to contact her on urgent matters call the agent who will inturn contact us - No phone calls to my home. Also, I change my hm line to unlisted no. However, due to emergency reasons, we gave her both my hb & my mobile no. just in case she needs to contact us when we are out(sometimes we leave bb with her for a while to go supermart). A month back, she sent her 1st letter to her family. I did not check content. Today, her folks keep sms & call our mobile asking her to call home. I'm rather unhappy cos:
1) She apparently gv our mobile nos. to her family without our consent
2) We have told her right from straight to call agent for any urgent matters. No phone calls to home. Well of course, if she wants to act bodoh & said it's ur mobile they are calling not home phone.
How do you think I shall deal with this? So far, my hb ans their call once cos he has overseas calls quite often & wont know who's the caller before answering
your maid is indeed bold. Why dun u ask her if she wants to leave NOW?
Btw, I need advice here re my Indo maid. From Day 1 she came to work for me, in front of the agent, we told her if her family wants to contact her on urgent matters call the agent who will inturn contact us - No phone calls to my home. Also, I change my hm line to unlisted no. However, due to emergency reasons, we gave her both my hb & my mobile no. just in case she needs to contact us when we are out(sometimes we leave bb with her for a while to go supermart). A month back, she sent her 1st letter to her family. I did not check content. Today, her folks keep sms & call our mobile asking her to call home. I'm rather unhappy cos:
1) She apparently gv our mobile nos. to her family without our consent
2) We have told her right from straight to call agent for any urgent matters. No phone calls to home. Well of course, if she wants to act bodoh & said it's ur mobile they are calling not home phone.
How do you think I shall deal with this? So far, my hb ans their call once cos he has overseas calls quite often & wont know who's the caller before answering
coffeedrinker,
Apparently your maid is not competent at all. Even cooking herself a simple meal also cannot manage.. and worst of all, she had a attitude problem. I will never tolerate a maid tat shows no respect to her employer.
If I am you, I will return her to the agent straight away & get a new maid.
Apparently your maid is not competent at all. Even cooking herself a simple meal also cannot manage.. and worst of all, she had a attitude problem. I will never tolerate a maid tat shows no respect to her employer.
If I am you, I will return her to the agent straight away & get a new maid.
coffeedrinker
Member
mine a philipino..
Philipino will be more bold as they work longer with you .
Philipino will be more bold as they work longer with you .
Yah man, my 1st is a Phillipino & always face black black when I told her off. My current Indo maid at least give me the kind of respect which makes me feel more bossy lah. Haha...
coffeedrinker,
Just reply the thread that u r looking for a transfer maid. If u keen, I help u to check out the experienced maid from my Mum's neighbour.
coffeedrinker,
Just reply the thread that u r looking for a transfer maid. If u keen, I help u to check out the experienced maid from my Mum's neighbour.
coffeedrinker
Member
ok..Thanks cat_tail.
Keep me inform over the thread at market place
Keep me inform over the thread at market place
hi gals..
seems like my maid is getting bolder than b4. went to hospital with my dad for his checkup. my dad asked her wat she want for lunch? she can tell my dad "ICE-CREAM"! on the spot, was scolded by my bro who was with them that day. but again.. 2 days later, my dad brought her to jurong point to replenish some groceries after his checkup. she again request for ice cream.. sigh! my dad actualli bought a small tub for her! anyone of u encounter similar case? how to tell them off discreetly? thou i wld say she did a good job attending to my dad whenever she accompany daddy to hospital. first time, i can take it as a small reward from my dad to her.. but how can i stop such request from happening again? my parents treat maids too well n softhearted towards them.
seems like my maid is getting bolder than b4. went to hospital with my dad for his checkup. my dad asked her wat she want for lunch? she can tell my dad "ICE-CREAM"! on the spot, was scolded by my bro who was with them that day. but again.. 2 days later, my dad brought her to jurong point to replenish some groceries after his checkup. she again request for ice cream.. sigh! my dad actualli bought a small tub for her! anyone of u encounter similar case? how to tell them off discreetly? thou i wld say she did a good job attending to my dad whenever she accompany daddy to hospital. first time, i can take it as a small reward from my dad to her.. but how can i stop such request from happening again? my parents treat maids too well n softhearted towards them.
jo,
from day one i told my maid that she cannot be fussy about the food she eats. whatever we cook or buy for her she has to eat, if she don't like then too bad, nothing else to eat lor. we also don't allow her to choose what she wants to eat if we happen to go out for meals. i will just buy her whatever i feel she should eat (eg fried rice or chicken rice, etc) and she will eat that. don't want them to get spoilt.
as for the phonecard, get the Phoenix one. 7-11 sell it, for $10 (phone value $8.50).
from day one i told my maid that she cannot be fussy about the food she eats. whatever we cook or buy for her she has to eat, if she don't like then too bad, nothing else to eat lor. we also don't allow her to choose what she wants to eat if we happen to go out for meals. i will just buy her whatever i feel she should eat (eg fried rice or chicken rice, etc) and she will eat that. don't want them to get spoilt.
as for the phonecard, get the Phoenix one. 7-11 sell it, for $10 (phone value $8.50).
coffeedrinker,
Your filipino maid seems to be just like my ex-filipino maid. You should not talk to her about leaving. Just go and find a suitable maid and arrange everything first. Then inform your agency to come and bring her back. Tell her that she is leaving only when the person coming to collect her arrives. Don't need to feel sorry for this type of maid.
I made a mistake asking my ex-maid to look for another employer. She went crazy and gave me a nightmare. In the end I got to call the police to get her out of my house.
Your filipino maid seems to be just like my ex-filipino maid. You should not talk to her about leaving. Just go and find a suitable maid and arrange everything first. Then inform your agency to come and bring her back. Tell her that she is leaving only when the person coming to collect her arrives. Don't need to feel sorry for this type of maid.
I made a mistake asking my ex-maid to look for another employer. She went crazy and gave me a nightmare. In the end I got to call the police to get her out of my house.
Jo,
Just don't ask her what she wants anymore. Do like what Lani says. If you go out for lunch, just buy whatever you think is suitable for her. At home, don't bother buying ice cream or anything extra for her. At most buy her some biscuits for teabreak, bread for breakfast, and that's it. Nothing else. If she dare to ask you, just smile and forget about it.
Just don't ask her what she wants anymore. Do like what Lani says. If you go out for lunch, just buy whatever you think is suitable for her. At home, don't bother buying ice cream or anything extra for her. At most buy her some biscuits for teabreak, bread for breakfast, and that's it. Nothing else. If she dare to ask you, just smile and forget about it.
Jo, if my family is eating ice cream or fruits, we will give some to the maid. Afterall, they worked hard for us the whole day, they deserve something nice too.
But my mum made it clear that these things are expensive, they can only eat when we offer it to them. Even if we have 1 piece of apple left, my maid will not eat it unless we ask her to.
If your maid DEMAND for it, DO NOT GIVE. Tell your dad that by giving her what she wants, he is spoiling the market. Make it difficult for you to maintain disapline in her. If they want to be nice to her and show their appreciation, they can share fruits or foods when WHEN THE FAMILY IS HAVING THEM. Not the maid alone eating it only.
When it comes to dining outside, the only preference I give is rice or noodles. Then I decide from there.
Tea break just make sure got 3-in-1 coffee or milo, some biscuits and bread for her can already. My family dun eat bread, only the maid eat bread. My mum will buy plain bread for her every 3 days. Kaya and jam she can choose, but onli one type at a time, cannot buy both together. Biscuit wise, sometimes those assorted variety types got offer, my mum will get those. If not, my mum will get the Julie's plain cracker, she can eat with kaya or jam. My maid likes the plain ones better
She loves to dip it in her coffee
But my mum made it clear that these things are expensive, they can only eat when we offer it to them. Even if we have 1 piece of apple left, my maid will not eat it unless we ask her to.
If your maid DEMAND for it, DO NOT GIVE. Tell your dad that by giving her what she wants, he is spoiling the market. Make it difficult for you to maintain disapline in her. If they want to be nice to her and show their appreciation, they can share fruits or foods when WHEN THE FAMILY IS HAVING THEM. Not the maid alone eating it only.
When it comes to dining outside, the only preference I give is rice or noodles. Then I decide from there.
Tea break just make sure got 3-in-1 coffee or milo, some biscuits and bread for her can already. My family dun eat bread, only the maid eat bread. My mum will buy plain bread for her every 3 days. Kaya and jam she can choose, but onli one type at a time, cannot buy both together. Biscuit wise, sometimes those assorted variety types got offer, my mum will get those. If not, my mum will get the Julie's plain cracker, she can eat with kaya or jam. My maid likes the plain ones better
Hi mothers
i happen to browse the forum and come across this thread. I have a dilemma.
My maid has been working for us since last Nov. Initially I had alot of problems with her but we gave each other time to work it out, cos' she's new to spore and we just didn't want to give up too easily.
Anyway, she fell ill v often initially but eventually she was ok for a few mths. Her work attitude is so so, on bad days she's v black face, and good days very smiley. To me she's temperamental. Cleaning of house - sucks, but taking care of baby - good cos' at least my baby got no problem in her hands.
A week ago, she started to cough. I gave her cough med and it cleared up. Then she complained of chest pains, can't breathe - rushed her to clinic and took med and slept for 1 entire day. Next day she said again cannot breathe - again rush to doc.. this time diagnosis is rhinitis, an allergic reaction. Doc gave nasal spray and told her to come back within 1 mth - if not better test for asthma.
I keep her this long because she's good with my baby. That's the only reason. I close 2 eyes to her housework n cleanliness. now with her illness i'm not sure if I shld wait and see. what if it takes a while to get a replacement?
because of her sickness i had to do laundry, sterilise baby bottles etc so I went into kitchen. only to discover stale water collecting on trays, dirt and dead ants everywhere, foods turned mouldy in fridge. I've instructed her to clean fridge weekly, toss out expired foods. I've also given her a list of what to do to rid breeding of mosquitoes.
what would most of u do? gamble for a new maid or keep her?
i happen to browse the forum and come across this thread. I have a dilemma.
My maid has been working for us since last Nov. Initially I had alot of problems with her but we gave each other time to work it out, cos' she's new to spore and we just didn't want to give up too easily.
Anyway, she fell ill v often initially but eventually she was ok for a few mths. Her work attitude is so so, on bad days she's v black face, and good days very smiley. To me she's temperamental. Cleaning of house - sucks, but taking care of baby - good cos' at least my baby got no problem in her hands.
A week ago, she started to cough. I gave her cough med and it cleared up. Then she complained of chest pains, can't breathe - rushed her to clinic and took med and slept for 1 entire day. Next day she said again cannot breathe - again rush to doc.. this time diagnosis is rhinitis, an allergic reaction. Doc gave nasal spray and told her to come back within 1 mth - if not better test for asthma.
I keep her this long because she's good with my baby. That's the only reason. I close 2 eyes to her housework n cleanliness. now with her illness i'm not sure if I shld wait and see. what if it takes a while to get a replacement?
because of her sickness i had to do laundry, sterilise baby bottles etc so I went into kitchen. only to discover stale water collecting on trays, dirt and dead ants everywhere, foods turned mouldy in fridge. I've instructed her to clean fridge weekly, toss out expired foods. I've also given her a list of what to do to rid breeding of mosquitoes.
what would most of u do? gamble for a new maid or keep her?
pammie,
You should definitely change your maid. There are so many good maids out there, why waste your money on this one ? If you choose wisely, a new maid is not a gamble. Get those who have worked for another family, as similar to your family as possible. If she has worked for the same employer for 3 - 4 years, she must be OK otherwise people will not renew her contract. It should be a safe choice.
Don't just go to one agency. Widen your search by using a search engine such as
http://www.netmaid.com.sg/?f=maid.search
Don't be afraid to change, just keep changing until you get a good one.
You should definitely change your maid. There are so many good maids out there, why waste your money on this one ? If you choose wisely, a new maid is not a gamble. Get those who have worked for another family, as similar to your family as possible. If she has worked for the same employer for 3 - 4 years, she must be OK otherwise people will not renew her contract. It should be a safe choice.
Don't just go to one agency. Widen your search by using a search engine such as
http://www.netmaid.com.sg/?f=maid.search
Don't be afraid to change, just keep changing until you get a good one.
Hi Pammie,
I went through something similar as you - and now I am looking for a maid. Let me share with you what happened. Some of the ladies here may remember me, as I asked for advice many months ago when I started looking for a maid to look after my baby.
I hired my maid last Nov. She has 6 years exp from HK - working with expat families (2 big mistakes that I made here - never hire someone who has worked in HK, and worse still, with expat families!). She was generally good with taking care of my baby - and my boy appeared to like her. She could give me constructive feedback on things to buy/ do for him. So I was pretty satisfied with her. To be honest, her housework is really not good, but I kept her on account of my son.
During her first month, she argued with my mum - answered my mum back when my mum asked her not to do something. I told her to be polite to my mum. She showed black face for 1 week, and I called the agent, wanted to send her back. Agent asked me to give her a chance. So I did, and she improved. From then, I started to trust her with my boy. (Housework - not good, but I closed both eyes).
She told me that she has no time to cook during the day cos my son needs constant attention and would cry if she is not with him. So I catered food for her. This is partially cos I did not want her to be oily and dirty while caring for my boy.
I gave her phone cards to call home. And I bring her out for meals/ treats on weekends. I buy ice cream for her to eat..and she hardly cooks - if there is no food in the house, I give her money to buy food - she said that she does not like instant noodles.
Things started to change as her loan is finishing. During the month that she was due to have her off day, she asked me for a fixed off day per month. I said - ok, but sometimes if I have overseas biz trip, this off day may need to be shuffled to other weeks. She said that I have to tell her 2 weeks before hand. And then told me that I have to compromise and agree to her request cos I need her to take care of my son (she knows that both my mum and MIL are not around to help me).
Then - she started to forget things - forgot to cook porridge for my son. Forgot to store milk powder. Sometimes, "purposely" forget certain instructions. I realised it is cos she has been distracted by her hp. So I told her - no handphone during the day. She can use her hp at night. She gave me a very black face. And told me that I am unreasoable.
She even asked me if I were afraid abt losing my S$5k ..cos she said all her friends told her that we (employers) are afraid of them running away!
2 weeks ago, late one night, just before I was to fly off for an overseas business trip, she came to my room said - I quit, I am giving you a month;s notice now. I was shocked - cos I have treated her so well. She said she is not happy. And told me that I should be glad that she is giving me 1 month's notice - and that she did not run away. So I told her - please run away, the police will arrest you. On yes, she timed it - so that I am away for a few days and could not do anything abt her during this period.
I contacted her agent and told her what happened. Her agent got very angry with her - cos all the previous months when she met her agent, she always said how well I treated her. So her agent said that if she can not cope at my place (not happy), she can not find her another employer.And her agent told her - no such thing as 1 month's notice..(I thk my maid thinks she is working for the Government!). Oh yes, my mum offered her S$50 extra per month..and she said "No, I am not working for money! I have decided and you can not change my mind"
So anyway, a few days ago, she started begging me to take her back. Crying..etc..said that she is worried that she can not get another employer ..and that her daughter needs money etc. No way am I going to take her back - I do not trust her anymore.
I have sent her back to the agent 2 days ago. I have given her 7 days to look for another employer - after which, if she can not be placed, she will be sent back home.
Pammie, trust me, even we close both our eyes and treat our maids very well, when there is any opprtunity, the maid will take advantage of you. Even if she can care for your baby, I feel that attitude is the most impt. I do have friends who have very good maids - but think their maids are overall good..and not just good at caring for the baby.
So back to your situation, I think you should quickly search for a new maid and send her away ASAP.
Oh yes, after her departure, I found that many of my baby things are so dirty. Before that, whenever I spot check, she gets very defensive and upset if I do catch her.
Sorry I got carried away. I am just really angry.
But I still have to look for a maid now. Meanwhile , I have sent my baby home to my mum's place for the time being.
I went through something similar as you - and now I am looking for a maid. Let me share with you what happened. Some of the ladies here may remember me, as I asked for advice many months ago when I started looking for a maid to look after my baby.
I hired my maid last Nov. She has 6 years exp from HK - working with expat families (2 big mistakes that I made here - never hire someone who has worked in HK, and worse still, with expat families!). She was generally good with taking care of my baby - and my boy appeared to like her. She could give me constructive feedback on things to buy/ do for him. So I was pretty satisfied with her. To be honest, her housework is really not good, but I kept her on account of my son.
During her first month, she argued with my mum - answered my mum back when my mum asked her not to do something. I told her to be polite to my mum. She showed black face for 1 week, and I called the agent, wanted to send her back. Agent asked me to give her a chance. So I did, and she improved. From then, I started to trust her with my boy. (Housework - not good, but I closed both eyes).
She told me that she has no time to cook during the day cos my son needs constant attention and would cry if she is not with him. So I catered food for her. This is partially cos I did not want her to be oily and dirty while caring for my boy.
I gave her phone cards to call home. And I bring her out for meals/ treats on weekends. I buy ice cream for her to eat..and she hardly cooks - if there is no food in the house, I give her money to buy food - she said that she does not like instant noodles.
Things started to change as her loan is finishing. During the month that she was due to have her off day, she asked me for a fixed off day per month. I said - ok, but sometimes if I have overseas biz trip, this off day may need to be shuffled to other weeks. She said that I have to tell her 2 weeks before hand. And then told me that I have to compromise and agree to her request cos I need her to take care of my son (she knows that both my mum and MIL are not around to help me).
Then - she started to forget things - forgot to cook porridge for my son. Forgot to store milk powder. Sometimes, "purposely" forget certain instructions. I realised it is cos she has been distracted by her hp. So I told her - no handphone during the day. She can use her hp at night. She gave me a very black face. And told me that I am unreasoable.
She even asked me if I were afraid abt losing my S$5k ..cos she said all her friends told her that we (employers) are afraid of them running away!
2 weeks ago, late one night, just before I was to fly off for an overseas business trip, she came to my room said - I quit, I am giving you a month;s notice now. I was shocked - cos I have treated her so well. She said she is not happy. And told me that I should be glad that she is giving me 1 month's notice - and that she did not run away. So I told her - please run away, the police will arrest you. On yes, she timed it - so that I am away for a few days and could not do anything abt her during this period.
I contacted her agent and told her what happened. Her agent got very angry with her - cos all the previous months when she met her agent, she always said how well I treated her. So her agent said that if she can not cope at my place (not happy), she can not find her another employer.And her agent told her - no such thing as 1 month's notice..(I thk my maid thinks she is working for the Government!). Oh yes, my mum offered her S$50 extra per month..and she said "No, I am not working for money! I have decided and you can not change my mind"
So anyway, a few days ago, she started begging me to take her back. Crying..etc..said that she is worried that she can not get another employer ..and that her daughter needs money etc. No way am I going to take her back - I do not trust her anymore.
I have sent her back to the agent 2 days ago. I have given her 7 days to look for another employer - after which, if she can not be placed, she will be sent back home.
Pammie, trust me, even we close both our eyes and treat our maids very well, when there is any opprtunity, the maid will take advantage of you. Even if she can care for your baby, I feel that attitude is the most impt. I do have friends who have very good maids - but think their maids are overall good..and not just good at caring for the baby.
So back to your situation, I think you should quickly search for a new maid and send her away ASAP.
Oh yes, after her departure, I found that many of my baby things are so dirty. Before that, whenever I spot check, she gets very defensive and upset if I do catch her.
Sorry I got carried away. I am just really angry.
But I still have to look for a maid now. Meanwhile , I have sent my baby home to my mum's place for the time being.
Hi Pammie,
i agree with tamarind and chin. i would advise you to change your maid, i feel as per your description, if housecleaning sucks and there's no hygience in the kitchen, how to ensure the well being of your baby's hygience. Moreover, there is already signs that she is pretty weak physically, a maid is suppose to help you, not to be an extra worry or burden to you. imagine you have to worry abt her illness all the time.
i'm sure you will be able to find someone better and also able to take care of your bb
hi chin,
hope you're feeling better now. your maid sounds really freaky. is she indo or phil?
i agree with tamarind and chin. i would advise you to change your maid, i feel as per your description, if housecleaning sucks and there's no hygience in the kitchen, how to ensure the well being of your baby's hygience. Moreover, there is already signs that she is pretty weak physically, a maid is suppose to help you, not to be an extra worry or burden to you. imagine you have to worry abt her illness all the time.
i'm sure you will be able to find someone better and also able to take care of your bb
hi chin,
hope you're feeling better now. your maid sounds really freaky. is she indo or phil?
Ribena,
Thanks - I am feeling ok. Just glad to be rid of her..cos I really "ren" many things on account of my baby. But since she is gone - I feel a sense of relief..like I can start afresh.
And I am so glad that I have sent my baby to my parents' home - cos I can see and hear how happy my parents are to have him. In fact, now I have decided to let my son spend a week or 2 with them every few months...
She is Filipina.
I am sure that there are many good maids out there. But I somehow ended up with a cunning one. Even the agent said so - and the agent told me that most of her "problem" cases are ex-HK ex-expat maids. Very arrogant..and stubborn.
Tamarid is right - never be afraid to change maids. Thanks for that.
Thanks - I am feeling ok. Just glad to be rid of her..cos I really "ren" many things on account of my baby. But since she is gone - I feel a sense of relief..like I can start afresh.
She is Filipina.
I am sure that there are many good maids out there. But I somehow ended up with a cunning one. Even the agent said so - and the agent told me that most of her "problem" cases are ex-HK ex-expat maids. Very arrogant..and stubborn.
Tamarid is right - never be afraid to change maids. Thanks for that.
hi,
Am I too lucky!!! I'm first time employ maid in Mar 2006, my one is Catholic Filipino maid.. she is with me about 3 month+ , she is fresh. about 27 yo married with one 2 year kid.
So far i find her honest,hygience, hardworking,loving, she is educated, she not even do the feeding,bathing,she also teaching my gal.walking, singing,action like bye,hi,close and open. heard from others, maid will change after they gave their full salary izzit?? i got a bit worries ..
Am I too lucky!!! I'm first time employ maid in Mar 2006, my one is Catholic Filipino maid.. she is with me about 3 month+ , she is fresh. about 27 yo married with one 2 year kid.
So far i find her honest,hygience, hardworking,loving, she is educated, she not even do the feeding,bathing,she also teaching my gal.walking, singing,action like bye,hi,close and open. heard from others, maid will change after they gave their full salary izzit?? i got a bit worries ..
Sharon, from my family's experience, a good maid will send most of her salary back, leaving probably S$20-50 for themselves to spend every month.
My mum has persuaded most of my maids to keep their money here and only bring it back when they go back. Cos our past maids have written back to us to say that their family has spent all the money she sent and now they got no money AGAIN.
Once full salary starts, suggest to your maid that she gets some money to spend (maybe S$30) and some to send back (maybe S$50/mth or wait till rates are good then send). Keep the rest in the back for her. Open an account under her name for her. Every month on pay day, show her that you have credited her pay into the bank
If she asks why, tell her other maids send their money back, then when they go back, money spend finish already. Just send some (enough for their daily expenses) can already. When she go home with large sum of money, she can decide how it will be spent. Anyway, it is her hard earned money
My mum has persuaded most of my maids to keep their money here and only bring it back when they go back. Cos our past maids have written back to us to say that their family has spent all the money she sent and now they got no money AGAIN.
Once full salary starts, suggest to your maid that she gets some money to spend (maybe S$30) and some to send back (maybe S$50/mth or wait till rates are good then send). Keep the rest in the back for her. Open an account under her name for her. Every month on pay day, show her that you have credited her pay into the bank
Pammie, just like how bosses will sack us if our job is not well-done, you should change your maid.
Closing 1 eye is not the long term solution. Once she realises that you are closing 1 eye, she will become more bold.
My aunt stays in a super huge house with only 1 maid and when we have parties, we bring our maid over to help. My maid always tell me she is thankful that she doesnt have to clean such a big house. And she keeps our house v clean cos she say my aunt's house so dirty, the maid v 'shame shame', never keep the house clean.
It is also the maid's pride in the house. I have guests over v often and they always praise my maid saying she keeps the house so clean. My maid will feel so proud and happy.
The maid that looked after my sis when she was born also took pride in her work. She did not allow anyone to touch my sis without washing their hands properly. And she will check before you carry! Plus if she finds that you are playing too rough, she will just walk over and carry my sis away.
When new maid comes, just tell her that the house clean or not, reflects on her, not you. The chold well-taken care of or not, also reflect on her. Once they learn to take pride, they will do their work v well
Closing 1 eye is not the long term solution. Once she realises that you are closing 1 eye, she will become more bold.
My aunt stays in a super huge house with only 1 maid and when we have parties, we bring our maid over to help. My maid always tell me she is thankful that she doesnt have to clean such a big house. And she keeps our house v clean cos she say my aunt's house so dirty, the maid v 'shame shame', never keep the house clean.
It is also the maid's pride in the house. I have guests over v often and they always praise my maid saying she keeps the house so clean. My maid will feel so proud and happy.
The maid that looked after my sis when she was born also took pride in her work. She did not allow anyone to touch my sis without washing their hands properly. And she will check before you carry! Plus if she finds that you are playing too rough, she will just walk over and carry my sis away.
When new maid comes, just tell her that the house clean or not, reflects on her, not you. The chold well-taken care of or not, also reflect on her. Once they learn to take pride, they will do their work v well
chin,
Sorry to hear about your bad experience. But don't let this affect you, keep trying until you get a really good maid. I myself have sent back 4 maids ! I have low tolerance for maids who can't work or have bad attitude.
sharon,
Does your maid have off day ? They will change after they start to have off days, or start to carry handphones. So disallow handphones and off days to save yourself trouble.
Sorry to hear about your bad experience. But don't let this affect you, keep trying until you get a really good maid. I myself have sent back 4 maids ! I have low tolerance for maids who can't work or have bad attitude.
sharon,
Does your maid have off day ? They will change after they start to have off days, or start to carry handphones. So disallow handphones and off days to save yourself trouble.
coffeedrinker
Member
sharon,
your maid sound like my maid, for one second , I thought you are talking about my maid..
My maid teach my gal close open , clap hand, where is bird and my baby will look at the sky, feeding, bath, change diaper, singing and read book/falsh card..
of all the above good things, she is just babysitter to me , not maid.. she can't cook, she forgeful, she cannot do housework well.
She told me she wants to leave after repaying all her loan in 2 months time after I told her off that sock , brief and panty should not soak together.
Well, quite shock that she is angry and now I'm preparing to get a new maid. Nevertheless, I will ask her again if she is serious on leaving.
I do want to keep her although of above flaw she has.. but for my baby sake.. what can I do.
To change a new means :
- take gamble (this gamble is a lot of concern, character, if got bad breathe, body odor, home sick type, these are things that I cannot find out..really gamble)
- got to on leave 1 or 2 week to teach my maid
- after 1 or 2 week, got to fetch both maid and baby to my mum place for supervision till "pass all test" to prove can alone with baby alone.
total losses : my 10 days leave + boss say "so long" leave, affect performance + travel to & fro to mum place for maybe 2 months + my baby got to get use to new maid (afraid she cry when see new maid)
Therefore, if my maid change her maid about leaving, I will stop her doing housework that she cannot do well and I do myself rather than dirty and mess up..what to do, for my baby sake, just bear and "ren" lor..
I very angry that I have to bear with a maid that I pay money for, but for cases like I "calculated" , I left with no choice, unless I gurantee with a better one.
I have many maid before. I simply no luck in maid.
1st one : come 1st day, fever, vomit..so my mum don't like
2nd one : come 1 month, home sick
3rd one : fall asleep when feeding my baby milk
4th one : Cannot speak english at all! only yes mdm. 1 day i sent back
Infant is out.. baby get sick easily in infant care, so I got to on leave again and again.. will affect my perforamnce at work.
Nanny : so is the same as my maid now ..just care baby, no housework. so hope my maid will stay.
your maid sound like my maid, for one second , I thought you are talking about my maid..
My maid teach my gal close open , clap hand, where is bird and my baby will look at the sky, feeding, bath, change diaper, singing and read book/falsh card..
of all the above good things, she is just babysitter to me , not maid.. she can't cook, she forgeful, she cannot do housework well.
She told me she wants to leave after repaying all her loan in 2 months time after I told her off that sock , brief and panty should not soak together.
Well, quite shock that she is angry and now I'm preparing to get a new maid. Nevertheless, I will ask her again if she is serious on leaving.
I do want to keep her although of above flaw she has.. but for my baby sake.. what can I do.
To change a new means :
- take gamble (this gamble is a lot of concern, character, if got bad breathe, body odor, home sick type, these are things that I cannot find out..really gamble)
- got to on leave 1 or 2 week to teach my maid
- after 1 or 2 week, got to fetch both maid and baby to my mum place for supervision till "pass all test" to prove can alone with baby alone.
total losses : my 10 days leave + boss say "so long" leave, affect performance + travel to & fro to mum place for maybe 2 months + my baby got to get use to new maid (afraid she cry when see new maid)
Therefore, if my maid change her maid about leaving, I will stop her doing housework that she cannot do well and I do myself rather than dirty and mess up..what to do, for my baby sake, just bear and "ren" lor..
I very angry that I have to bear with a maid that I pay money for, but for cases like I "calculated" , I left with no choice, unless I gurantee with a better one.
I have many maid before. I simply no luck in maid.
1st one : come 1st day, fever, vomit..so my mum don't like
2nd one : come 1 month, home sick
3rd one : fall asleep when feeding my baby milk
4th one : Cannot speak english at all! only yes mdm. 1 day i sent back
Infant is out.. baby get sick easily in infant care, so I got to on leave again and again.. will affect my perforamnce at work.
Nanny : so is the same as my maid now ..just care baby, no housework. so hope my maid will stay.
Sharon - my maid was also like yours..sing to baby..etc etc..btw, on her last day, she held onto my son for 10 min..and cried. She kissed him on the cheeks..and did not let go for a few minutes. When she goes for her off day, the first thing she does when she comes back is to carry him and tell him "I miss you so much!". How genuine all these are - I have no idea. I can not reconcile her actions and her words.
Coffeedrinker- I sympathise and empathise with you. That's how I felt abt my maid.
Tamarind - thanks. I am still convinced that there are good maids out there.
Now - for some advise from you ladies. I have shortlisted a maid who used to be a Montessori pre-nursery teaher in her hometown - for 4 years. Quite highly educated, with Bachelor of English degree. Do you thk someone like her will take NO OFF DAY? I agree with Tamarind that to save us from trouble, we shld just have no off day policy. But - they are also human...need some time to themselves. And agent advise me that from her experience, maids with no off days can not last beyond 1 year.
What do you all think??
Coffeedrinker- I sympathise and empathise with you. That's how I felt abt my maid.
Tamarind - thanks. I am still convinced that there are good maids out there.
Now - for some advise from you ladies. I have shortlisted a maid who used to be a Montessori pre-nursery teaher in her hometown - for 4 years. Quite highly educated, with Bachelor of English degree. Do you thk someone like her will take NO OFF DAY? I agree with Tamarind that to save us from trouble, we shld just have no off day policy. But - they are also human...need some time to themselves. And agent advise me that from her experience, maids with no off days can not last beyond 1 year.
What do you all think??
Chin, if you dun wanna give off day, you must make it up in other ways.
My mum dun like to give off days cos scared the maid will make frens then start to stray. So my mum will bring the maid out every Sunday afternoon for shopping. On festivities, CNY, hari raya, etc, my mum will bring her to go try out the different foods, etc. CNY my mum will buy new clothes for the maid also.
Basically if you treat her well and give her a good break once a week, I think it is alright
My mum dun like to give off days cos scared the maid will make frens then start to stray. So my mum will bring the maid out every Sunday afternoon for shopping. On festivities, CNY, hari raya, etc, my mum will bring her to go try out the different foods, etc. CNY my mum will buy new clothes for the maid also.
Basically if you treat her well and give her a good break once a week, I think it is alright
chin,
Is she a filipino maid ? If she is new with no experience, she will agree to no off day at first, then after working for you for a few months, she will ask for day off. If you have a newborn, my advise is do not give her off day for at least the first year. This is because she may get all sorts of diseases out there and infect your baby. After one year, if you think she is trustworthy and have a stable personality, then you can consider giving her day off.
But frankly I will not go for a filipino who is highly educated. I definitely don't want to depend on a filipino maid to teach my kid, because I heard of cases when the kid start to speak in filipino-accented English. To me the most important thing about a maid is that she is obedient, follows instructions and respect elders. Education level is not important.
coffeedrinker,
If you get a maid who has worked in Singapore for at least 3 - 4 years taking care of newborn and babies, there is no need to take leave to train her at all. The best is to find one already working in Singapore, so you can interview her to see if she is fat or have bad body odour. My current maid is able to help me from the day she arrived, I don't need to take any leave. I have also sent back 4 maids, and I know how you feel. But for the sake of ourselves and our babies, we just have to keep trying.
Is she a filipino maid ? If she is new with no experience, she will agree to no off day at first, then after working for you for a few months, she will ask for day off. If you have a newborn, my advise is do not give her off day for at least the first year. This is because she may get all sorts of diseases out there and infect your baby. After one year, if you think she is trustworthy and have a stable personality, then you can consider giving her day off.
But frankly I will not go for a filipino who is highly educated. I definitely don't want to depend on a filipino maid to teach my kid, because I heard of cases when the kid start to speak in filipino-accented English. To me the most important thing about a maid is that she is obedient, follows instructions and respect elders. Education level is not important.
coffeedrinker,
If you get a maid who has worked in Singapore for at least 3 - 4 years taking care of newborn and babies, there is no need to take leave to train her at all. The best is to find one already working in Singapore, so you can interview her to see if she is fat or have bad body odour. My current maid is able to help me from the day she arrived, I don't need to take any leave. I have also sent back 4 maids, and I know how you feel. But for the sake of ourselves and our babies, we just have to keep trying.
Tamarind,
I take your point ..and my hubby seems to share your point of view also. And I forgot to add - she is very pretty. So - I guess I have to drop her from my list. Also, since she has never worked as a maid before, she may have trouble adjusting to doing housework.
So, I am still looking.
I take your point ..and my hubby seems to share your point of view also. And I forgot to add - she is very pretty. So - I guess I have to drop her from my list. Also, since she has never worked as a maid before, she may have trouble adjusting to doing housework.
So, I am still looking.
i agree fully with tamarind's opinions on filipino maid. my maid is indonesian and i am so happy that i decided to choose indo instead of filipino. it's true that most filipino can speak english better than indo and are relatively good with babies & toddlers, but then my maid can speak english fairly well too, and she is great with my dd. but what's more impt is that she has an amazing attitude, is very respectful, hardworking and honest.
just want to share my observations on filipino maids i saw this past sat at a b'day party. my dd was invited to a b'day party at raffles marina, so obviously most of the families that attended the party are very well-off, and ALL of them had filipino maids that were highly educated. aiyoh...alot of the maids are very high maintenance kind one! some of them were so well-dressed, wearing make-up, jewellery, etc. one of them was wearing such a skin-tight and revealing top with shorts & high heels! she even had manicured nails, lots of shiny jewellery, and her watch also very shiny-shiny kind! even my hubby commented that you really couldn't tell the difference b/w the maids and their employers! and i watched them eat the food - wah, they can go for many, many rounds one, eating everything, esp the desserts, etc, as if they were the guests at the party! i know my maid would NEVER do that!
i don't know lah...maybe some very rich employers are ok with these kind of maids. but not me lah. don't think i would like a high maintenance maid - for sure will have lots of atitude problems one...
just want to share my observations on filipino maids i saw this past sat at a b'day party. my dd was invited to a b'day party at raffles marina, so obviously most of the families that attended the party are very well-off, and ALL of them had filipino maids that were highly educated. aiyoh...alot of the maids are very high maintenance kind one! some of them were so well-dressed, wearing make-up, jewellery, etc. one of them was wearing such a skin-tight and revealing top with shorts & high heels! she even had manicured nails, lots of shiny jewellery, and her watch also very shiny-shiny kind! even my hubby commented that you really couldn't tell the difference b/w the maids and their employers! and i watched them eat the food - wah, they can go for many, many rounds one, eating everything, esp the desserts, etc, as if they were the guests at the party! i know my maid would NEVER do that!
i don't know lah...maybe some very rich employers are ok with these kind of maids. but not me lah. don't think i would like a high maintenance maid - for sure will have lots of atitude problems one...
Lani - thanks for your feedback. i understand what u mean..my previous maid was not high maintenance using her own money...but she certainly acted very "atas" when it comes to my money - she threw away hard boiled eggs, does not eat instant noodles, does not eat biscuit, must drink Nescafe 8 times a day.
Tamarind - yes, that one is Filipina.
Tamarind - yes, that one is Filipina.
chin,
yes that's exactly what i mean! some of them behave quite "atas" one, ie. got taste & preferences with alot of the things they wear, eat, etc, which i don't really like. my maid is not like that at all - she is very humble and not fussy at all. she will eat whatever we cook or buy. sometimes when i decide to skip lunch at home, she will just cook instant noodles for herself to eat. and when we go out i ask her what she wants to eat or drink she says anything also can, so i always try to get rice for her so that she will be full.
yes that's exactly what i mean! some of them behave quite "atas" one, ie. got taste & preferences with alot of the things they wear, eat, etc, which i don't really like. my maid is not like that at all - she is very humble and not fussy at all. she will eat whatever we cook or buy. sometimes when i decide to skip lunch at home, she will just cook instant noodles for herself to eat. and when we go out i ask her what she wants to eat or drink she says anything also can, so i always try to get rice for her so that she will be full.
matsu
Active Member
hi all,
I also have a filipino maid which i regret taking her. I think its really true that they are of high maintenace. she actually drank 4 big pack of coffeemix in my mum place. And the worst thing is she think greatly of herself and is definitely wasting my mum's food and electricity. my mum water and electricity bill actually went up from $70 to $200 due to her usage of washing machine. she can throw 3 baby clothes into the washing machine. told her 6 times she still continue doing it. And many many stories.. sign so i decided to change her by the way how many times are you all allow to make transfer. mine only one time.
I also have a filipino maid which i regret taking her. I think its really true that they are of high maintenace. she actually drank 4 big pack of coffeemix in my mum place. And the worst thing is she think greatly of herself and is definitely wasting my mum's food and electricity. my mum water and electricity bill actually went up from $70 to $200 due to her usage of washing machine. she can throw 3 baby clothes into the washing machine. told her 6 times she still continue doing it. And many many stories.. sign so i decided to change her by the way how many times are you all allow to make transfer. mine only one time.
Lani,
It is an eye opener to see that kind of high maintenance maids. I don't understand, what kind of employer will keep this type of maids ? Is it ang moh employer ?
I think in general filipinos are more well off then Indonesians. A lot of filipinos come to Singapore to play, not to work. My Indonesian maid once told me that I have so many umbrellas at home (about 6), while she cannot even afford to have any umbrellas at home in Indonesia.
ming_liew,
You can apply for a work permit for a new maid through www.mom.gov.sg. I have not tried it before, but I have renewed the work permit before and it was very easy. The tricky part is finding a suitable maid, the application for work permit is relatively easy.
It is an eye opener to see that kind of high maintenance maids. I don't understand, what kind of employer will keep this type of maids ? Is it ang moh employer ?
I think in general filipinos are more well off then Indonesians. A lot of filipinos come to Singapore to play, not to work. My Indonesian maid once told me that I have so many umbrellas at home (about 6), while she cannot even afford to have any umbrellas at home in Indonesia.
ming_liew,
You can apply for a work permit for a new maid through www.mom.gov.sg. I have not tried it before, but I have renewed the work permit before and it was very easy. The tricky part is finding a suitable maid, the application for work permit is relatively easy.
tamarind,
they are not ang mohs but are s'poreans who are very very rich (ie. the kind who live in bungalows or penthouses) in orchard rd area. they are the kind with "old" money, ie. their families are very rich & they work in their successful family businesses immediately after graduating. maybe to them having educated "atas" filipino maids give them "face" or what...i also dunno lah...
actually i don't know any of them personally. they are all friends of the husband (who comes from a rich family), while my sis and i are friends with the wife. these ppl very funny one lah, my sis told me it's their practice to have a maid for EVERY child they have. so if they have 5 children they will have 5 maids! one more thing i heard at the party - the hubby's sister gave birth 9mths ago, and she hired a confinement nanny for 6mths liao!! siao ah!
they are not ang mohs but are s'poreans who are very very rich (ie. the kind who live in bungalows or penthouses) in orchard rd area. they are the kind with "old" money, ie. their families are very rich & they work in their successful family businesses immediately after graduating. maybe to them having educated "atas" filipino maids give them "face" or what...i also dunno lah...
actually i don't know any of them personally. they are all friends of the husband (who comes from a rich family), while my sis and i are friends with the wife. these ppl very funny one lah, my sis told me it's their practice to have a maid for EVERY child they have. so if they have 5 children they will have 5 maids! one more thing i heard at the party - the hubby's sister gave birth 9mths ago, and she hired a confinement nanny for 6mths liao!! siao ah!
Tamarind,
Haha.. This type of life.. luxury everybody want it.. In our dream.. maybe one day our dream will come true..
my maid no day off. sometimes tell her , i bring her out, she also don't want, she says got a lot of work. izzit she acting??
bring my gal go 9 month check up , doctor's commant says my gal grawthing very good.. stand, hold stabil, focu,everythings very good, doctor's says take very good care on my gal..
Haha.. This type of life.. luxury everybody want it.. In our dream.. maybe one day our dream will come true..
my maid no day off. sometimes tell her , i bring her out, she also don't want, she says got a lot of work. izzit she acting??
bring my gal go 9 month check up , doctor's commant says my gal grawthing very good.. stand, hold stabil, focu,everythings very good, doctor's says take very good care on my gal..
cheerful747
Active Member
Hi mummy with maid
Can I check with you how much to pay for a six monthly check up for maid?Thanks.The cheapest I found is raffles medical clinic at 19.95 dollars.thanks
Can I check with you how much to pay for a six monthly check up for maid?Thanks.The cheapest I found is raffles medical clinic at 19.95 dollars.thanks
Lani, my parents used to have a high maintenance maid also. But she did a very good job bringing up me and my siblings.
She looked after us for 4 years. During that 4 years, me and my brother both topped our classes in school (something which never happened before) and we won alot of awards for sports. She will coach us with schoolwork and bring us to the park to practise.
She is high maintenance in the sense that she dresses really well and has a HP. My parents bought the HP for her cos she is always bringing us out. My dad even got her a small car to drive us around. My mum works in the fashion industry, so always bring nice new clothes back for her. She dresses very well, with light make up, when she bring us out, she dun seem like our maid, more like a local nanny.
Though she is high maintenance, she keeps the house v clean, looks after us very well and my parents are very happy with her. Too bad she had to go back after 4 years cos her son misses her.
I think cannot judge a maid by appearance. Some of them may be 'high maintenance' cos they do a good job and their employers trust them and give them more entitlements and benefits.
She looked after us for 4 years. During that 4 years, me and my brother both topped our classes in school (something which never happened before) and we won alot of awards for sports. She will coach us with schoolwork and bring us to the park to practise.
She is high maintenance in the sense that she dresses really well and has a HP. My parents bought the HP for her cos she is always bringing us out. My dad even got her a small car to drive us around. My mum works in the fashion industry, so always bring nice new clothes back for her. She dresses very well, with light make up, when she bring us out, she dun seem like our maid, more like a local nanny.
Though she is high maintenance, she keeps the house v clean, looks after us very well and my parents are very happy with her. Too bad she had to go back after 4 years cos her son misses her.
I think cannot judge a maid by appearance. Some of them may be 'high maintenance' cos they do a good job and their employers trust them and give them more entitlements and benefits.
cheerful747
Active Member
Do you all have the problems that maid friend as in from singapore kept calling your house?If yes, how you handle...All these maid got the number via my maid 's mum in indo. I make a big mistake in allowing her to give her mum our number.Anyway, my phone is answered my me all the time and she is not allowed to pick phone so all the call are put to a stop...
