Advice on Myanmar Maid

Hi chalkey,

You are so kind....even give MC to maid. I think sometimes some people really abuse the kindness. They do not have MC actually.

Your maid is a bit too much. Imagine when we are sick, also only comes with 1 day MC and only with fever, we are able to get 2 days or 3. She is "on MC" for 10 days....zzzzz... Shouldn't have offer to give her rest actually. Normally when I know my maid is sick, I will try to help her do some of the stuff but I won't tell her not to do. Cos I know if I officially said, she will take it for granted.

She still continue to work but with me helping and I will also offer to ask her to go sleep earlier after I know I can do the rest. So no official rest. Aiya, actually she can rest all she want when she is alone at home in the afternoon when all my kids are in school n both me n my hb are working... My house actually nothing much also, basically the maid is so eng (free) the whole afternoon. Now this Filipino totally has nothing to do cos she don even take care of kids....

Eh u didn't ask your maid which star she like....so free, can flip magazine haha....
 


My timetable for maids got pictures n words for all duties. Put picture for them also. They can understand better
happy.gif
 
Hi tinklestar

Just my 2 cents worth.... having a list of things to do is not enough. There is no structure and deadlines. If you leave it to maid to plan, she will do what she likes, when she feels like it. You will be left waiting, tan ku ku for her to complete the list.

No need to do hour on hour time table. My household schedule, every morning, evening, she has a chore list, eg. 1-10, she has to complete in that order. I spell out all the details and the way I want it done. I know it can be done because all my previous maids and I have personally done it.

One maid tried to be funny and talk back that she did not have enough time, so this and that not done. I so I asked her to write out in front of me, everything she has done. As she was writing, she realized that she could do everything in half the time and she could not drag the time of the chore any longer.

If it is really attitude problem, then you might want to consider changing maids. When the new maid comes, you have to have your schedule ready and be very detailed about what she needs to do. Don't leave it loose.

With the help of the agent, drum into her mind that, she needs to follow instructions, all will be well. I tell her that I need to know that she can follow instructions and do the job, just like she needs to know that I will follow instructions to pay her for her job done.

Running a household is not a creative job, it is a mundane job of repeating the same chores over and over again. We don't eat one meal and live for the next week on the memory of that one meal.
 
lol....yaya...my that hand pain ex-myanmmar also tell me that she watch the 宫 back home. She bought dunno DVD or CD and watch all liao cos tat time she saw me play. She also like korean drama de.....

Time changes liao lor....their countries also quite advance haha....
 
Eh stshaw, I like this sentence haha......
We don't eat one meal and live for the next week on the memory of that one meal.
 
Hai, I wanted to write out a list with timetable but when I think abt how literal some of them can be, such as a little change in timing then they think that chore don need to do and I have a headache. I need them to be flexible and yet at the same time, understand what they should be doing daily weekly and monthly.

I was upset with current maid also because I realise she did not read the list I gave her. We even bought dictionary for her. Now she's better after I got agent to talk to her. Agent scolded her. Despite me telling her at least 3 times that she should finish the housework before she do her own stuff ( and I told her nicely) she still did nOt. Only when agent spoke to her then she realise I may really sent her back. Sometimes I think if my worker cannot listen to me only listen to the agent, then I should not keep her. I am giving her another month to try. Thereafter if she is still like this, I will likely sent her back. I never had such problems with my previous Myanmar maid.

If I know the maids are all like that now, I would rather let her have a hp the whole day and take a gamble. Current maid also cannot take care of children though she takes care of her baby sister. I now realize their background is too different from Singaporeans so asking them to take care of children is a bad idea. Just take the puzzles my toddler son do. My son is better than them at it...
 
One day I was talking to my Aunty, telling her that my maid has been singing loudly. She told me, maybe it's their way of stress relieve. I thought to myself, OK lah...... as long as she stops when I approach her.

I had one Indon maid that work for me for 6 years. She came to me when she was 20 yrs old. Within 3-4 weeks, she can work unsupervised.

The first things I said to her were, I do not want to touch anything and feel that it is oily or dusty. Everyday you follow instructions, work accordingly and look carefully and check everything with your hands.

She kept the house clean, do all her chores and then some. She follows instructions, finish her work on time and kept the house clean, she will look around to check and made sure things are clean to touch.

She learned to cook and cooked well. She simply followed instructions and did her job, everyone is happy. I gave her a lot of things and money. There were incidents here and there, but not serious, I can overlook them and keep her.

Hi mommybaby
Yah.. my maid talk back and said she cleaned already, but the items are not cleaned, there is still dust/oily. When did she clean them, yesterday, day before? That's why I asked her, if she shower everyday and eat everyday or just live on the memory of the meal or shower.

We live everyday also repeating the same routine and go to work etc and this is a maid's job. I don't see her forgeting to shower or eat everyday.

I keep wondering, don't these Myanmar girls have to help take care of younger sisters or brothers etc. What about cooking and housework? It appears that their mothers cook and do everything. They are not as backward as we think like Indons from kampong, where they are really more domesticated and know a maid's job and place in the household. If that were true of Myanmar, then they should not be exporting them as maids.
 
From my current maid's Behaviour, I think they don need to clean house in Myanmar. Only cook and carry baby whole day. Btw, all my maids, says their baby drinks milk until 3 years old so how to get them to take care.
 
Not very happy with MOM also. My maid has to go for interview. I am already in 2 heads over this maid now still have to worry about the stupid interview. After the talk with agent, I'm a bit scared of this maid, what she will say. Though we feed her well, give her ample rest.. Esp the rest part. Coz she has a habit of staying up late to read...
 
For the MOM interview, do the employers get to tell their views on the maid?

Or is it just the maid go in alone and talk?
 
Only maid. They will inform maid about safety issues, maid's rights and responsibilities. Somehow, I feel the last part was a after thought.. Haha. Coz even though my maid sign the MOM checklist, she wasn't behaving like she's aware after 2 weeks at my place.

What to do, maids have more rights then employers. Afterall, we can hang laundry outside the window, maid cannot unless we have safety measures for them.
 
dear mummies, i have given up on myanmar maids after 3 had worked for less than 5 mths while another 1 stole money after 6 mths. i did some self reflection thinking was it because the work load or environment or the boss.. ie me.. recently i checked their employment history.. i was one of the longest stay employer in their own history.. the one who worked for me 6 mths (stole money)but before me, she worked for 2 employers each less than a month.. the others all hv previous 2-3 employers each lasting less than 3 mths..finally got one who worked for previous employer 8 mths, but she again request to transfer out after 4+ mths. she is the one who also told me that most myanmar girls do not need to go out to work nor need to do housework / cooking at home as they live together with parents.
i just hired filipino one with middle east ex with a daughter. she is so much serious in her work and less demanding than my previous myanmar maids.. i hope it last though...
 
Hi tinklestar
What does it say on responsibilities? Does it say to help around the house?!?!?!

Hi Tam
Sounds like they are really just wanting a visit overseas with free food and lodging, just 'help around the house' and be paid for it.

My maid told me that when she was child, they had maid taking care of her and siblings. When her father died, the relatives chased her mother and them out of the house.
 
2/4
"If you are not happy, you can send me back to agency." or If you are not happy, you can get me transfer". These are two of the common phrases which employers hear from maids easily.

Simple to them. Employers' nightmares!
They argued they are human beings, deserved this deserved that at employer's expense. If we let them go due to their 'threats', poor attitude or working incapability (mindset is not to be a domestic helper), who suffered the most? Employers! By pretending unable to work, don't know how to carry out a task correctly after few trainings, weak or saying above, their wish are forced to be granted = sent back to agent. <font color="ff0000">How to hire and pay for a domestic helper when you're the one slogging at home &amp; work or forever at the losing end?</font>

We suffer time loss to find new replacement, re-train, take annual leave, pay additional costs imposed by agency and MOM.

MOM collects levy comfortably, agency continues to count money + no responsibilities, maid granted the luxury to rest at agency while employer pays for daily lodging and food (waiting for transfer), etc. Is this how Singaporean employers should be treated?

We paid levy, paid agency fee and insurance but what protection do we get? Anybody or organisation bothers to know the quality of maid nowadays is not worth the high pay? It is really high pay, compared to Hongkong because employers are paying levy, salary, agency fee, binded by repatriation clause (air-ticket) + security bond terms (runaway means $2500 to $5000 gone), in-house food &amp; lodging, etc.

A lot of local cleaners or housekeepers do not receive take home pay of $400-500 per month but maids do! Maids don't need to pay for food, transport, housing loan, CPF, education &amp; medical in Spore, etc. So is take home pay of $400-500 per month really low?? Taking into consideration, their demands are so high these days... more off days, chat on mobile frequently, no hanging of bamboo laundry, can't wash windows or car, shorter working hours (mine has 9-10 hrs rest), etc.

<font color="0000ff">Seriously, if you've a better choice, don't hire maid. The reason why we are suffering is because there's a high demand for maids in Spore. No matter how harsh, how unfair the terms are set, as long as the demand for FDWs didn't gone down sharply, our voices won't be heard.</font>

<font color="ff0000">I wrote to MP, even PM but they don't care! Grassroots came to visit my house and vanished (no follow-up). CEL kept giving suggestions that are non-feasible. Gov, CEL or MOM only read key words, not content of your message/problems so they kept giving wrong or impossible suggestion. 说风凉话 These people are not in my/our shoes or have no time to look at our root cause properly.</font> 事不关己 I suppose, we're small flies, not worth the effort and attention. So what I'm a locally born citizen. I don't have any strong backup to voice on my behalf nor am I or my hubby in an industry or position that commands power.

Highlighted my situation and reluctance to hire a maid..... I have a special needs child, no childcare or daycare centre setup for her or willing to accept her. Really forced to hire a maid so that I can work. If continue to stay home, we're unable to bear the costs of Sg high living standards. Get financial assistance .... you think so easy to ask govt for money? You able to withstand the coldness of your social worker, insensitivity, continuous financial assessment (means testing) and help (S$) that is insufficient.... having a special needs child or disability is costly in Spore!

I don't want maid but I don't have a choice. I've stayed home for many years, a financial drainage, used future money .... I have to work but government not compassionate or willing to help.

Advice: If you've a better choice (most of you should be better than me), especially if you or friend has encountered errant/princess maid, don't try to get yourself in messy business, no fun, stressful, nightmares, money wasted vs quality hired. The new era maids are not here to lighten your loads. If you want a big baby to take care or money nowhere to spend, they fit well!
 
Special needs,I can imagine how difficult it is since I have 2 kids and I can't stand them sometimes during normal days.

Personally, I wouldn't want a maid to look after my kid if he has special needs as I have seen a maid looking after a special need child in shopping centre.

Have you consider finding those special needs school for your child. I read somewhere in the newspaper that these schools are available in Singapore.
 
hi special needs, my full sympathy goes to u.. i have one special need kid too.. i can understand the financial strains esp from high costs on therapies. be strong!!
my current new filipino is in her 30s.. i find that these batch of maids seem to be more serious and really come here to work, not sightseeing... she told me in her hostel, alot of indoenesian maids are faking their ages.. i had hired underaged myanmar maids before but i only realise it AFTER i got them. all of them don't last.. they are not here to work or earn money. they did not suffer from poverty, hunger.. yes they are poor with low standard of living, but they are not starved..(unless in philippines, children running around naked, picking food from rubbish bins to eat..) hence i think these young girls don't mind if they are not earning enough to go back home.. some did not even incur any money to come here to work. they only incur the 'future' liability which is the 'initial loan' which are paid by employer. so what happens if they are not happy here, they do their work badly or steal money so that agency got to send them home 'free'...
i really hope our govt will do something to help we employers soon. i strong agree with Dew's suggestions.. her points are very relevant..
 
Hi tinklestar

My girl is attending half day special school, no full day available, thus, I need a daycare or childcare centre. Too bad, none available (not setup) so had to turn to maid or I continue to be homemaker and wait for money to drop.

Hi Tam
Glad to find somebody who understands the cost needed to raise a special need kid.

Certainly hope miracles will happen.
 
My child long passed preschool age .... also these two resources not near my house or special school.

I still remember the 1st time I've thicken my face to ask for financial assistance.... purposely carried my girl there as nobody interested to babysit her. At that time, household income was strictly cap at $1500/household. Very tough.

The coldness and attitude of that social worker really make Sporeans think thrice when trying to get money from govt. Noticed lately, more news on govt trying to help the needy ie low-come group. They have increased the income cap but how many already bitten and don't dare seek assistance? How many who required help but were turned away just because they were too honest and declared too much?

When the social worker saw my declaration of hubby owned a motorbike, she immediately said it was a luxury. She didn't bother to find out the type of bike and work out the cost of having it. Hubby worked shifts so he either leave house before 6am or leave office after 11pm. It is cheaper, more convenient, more time saving to have a motorbike (pic: http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-JrDsTS90Lz4/TnBBF90Mo_I/AAAAAAAADOY/B5U8sJoQRAY/s1600/HondaCub.jpg) rather than to flag a cab and be charged for peak hours or spend lots of time on transferring &amp; waiting for mrt and buses, late at night or early mornings.

When social worker saw I have some money (think about $2000) in my bank statement, her eyebrow raised, when she saw we've life insurance policies, she commented we should try to cut cost ie terminate the policies, don't rely too much on govt, get a job or work out other ways.

<font color="ff0000">So readers, if you've have a choice, don't hire maid. Comparing yourself and me, you're much fortunate, at least you don't have a child with developmental delay whereby no childcare centre including Integrated Childcare wants her.</font> When principal or teacher learnt she's 5yrs old yet not toilet trained and can't self feed, they claimed no vacancy.

For student care centres, they are meant for students above 7 yrs old and can attend mainstream, definitely not for children who rely on others, not independent, requires more attention and troublesome to them. We really had no choice but to hire a maid. Forced to work for our own money yet govt/MOM kept trying ways to make my only resource be taken away ie having so many unfair terms and policies, blindly &amp; super protective of maids and agencies.
 
Special needs,

Have you try writing to your MP or MCYS and feedback? I think people sometimes judge based on poverty or maybe you are just too soft when speaking to people like the social worker. If it's me, I would have retorted back and remind her that needing financial assistance doesn't mean I am stupid (I can well calculate the pros and cons of having a motorbike)as well as informing them that buying life insurance is to ensure that my child in future will not need to depend too much on the govt assistance should anything happens to me. And half the time, I find this people will feel ashame and try to help you.

stshaw, only stated responsibilities. Anyway, I figured out responsibilities can also mean that MOM might tell them things like " you don't need to wash the car" and "you should not clean the exterior of the windows"... like what I read was advised by MOM in other forums etcs

My maid is much better now, not because she's better in lanugage etc but I figured out she actually knows how to work because after I told her last Thursday after I got really fed up with her "If we are happy with you and you work 2 years with us, we will give you a sum of money" and also "i will send you back to agency if you don't improve". Immediately, vast improvement. Sigh. Ridiculous right? I am already paying her a salary to do her work properly but have to promised more to get her to do work properly. I can imagine, in the workplace, during the 3 months probation if I had behaved like her making obvious mistakes (bowl still dirty despite washing and I don't mean oily, it's something I can see and I wasn't even spot-checking), my boss will say sayonara to me and hope never see you again.
 
Hi SpecialNeeds

Sorry to hear about your situation and the social worker's response.

It appears that one will have to be like having no food for the next week and no job and living on the streets to have the govt to help. I think it makes sense to seek help now and received help now rather than wait until that time comes.

Your husband needs transport to work, we all do. That's a modest motorbike, not a luxury! I imagine $2000 in the bank is only about 1-2 months expenses for an average small family? With a child with special needs, it will additionally cost a whole lot of money.
 
Hi mummies
I m also putting with my Myanmar maid of 6 months! at first she can't speak or understand English , only know how to stand and stares out of window.
Agent scolded her a few times and only slight improvement .
she is still not very pro-active, cleaning not clean, whole day quiet and don't engage with my kids.
My kids don't like her at all. Hopefully I can endure her for one year.
Compared to my previous Myanmar maids, she is the worst!
 
Ladies,

Do you get cockroaches in the Hse with constant cleaning? A bit upset as a cockroach just flew at me when I opened the kitchen drawer. Ants, I can take it. Cockroaches always makes me upset..

My maid has improved and I don't want to be picky as she has been very helpful with children recently. But somehow, I feel her cleaning still pretty bad as kitchen floor still feels oily most of the time and leaves me wondering are they accumulated grime...
 
She's only been here a maid and I have seen 2 different cockroaches (size difference)...

She hasn't start getting pocket money but Today she told me she wants to make phone call and she hasn't even finish her work. She couldn't say properly So agent talk to her then she say call her friend to get her to call back home to say she's well. Don't know true or not. Anyway, she say she has her home phone number so likely we will let her call back but limited time.

Agent also told me that they were told at agency that they should buy their own calling card and call only after thy start getting pocket money. I think once they leave agent, everything agent says goes out from their ears. So even though MOM get them to sign the form stating A list of things they should be aware of is not working. They are so overprotected and they know they are that's why they can behave as and how they like. She also say call every 3 months after I told agent to remind her that this is a one off thing. Anyway see what happens next..
 
I thought my maid has vastly improved. Now I realised I am wrong.

We purchased a new pair of shoes for her and I gave her a relatively new dress. For a day on Saturday, she was allowed to wore this as we were going out of Singapore to attend a close relative's wedding. After she bathed in the hotel. she actually lie on facedown on the hotel bed while holding onto my son's body and it wasn't because of tireness from the trip. I saw this but decided to leave it be since it was a small thing.

Thereafter, she started behaving worse. She was supposed to sit with us at the table but because as there were some re-arrangements, we arranged her to sit at another table and to show respect to the other guest, since we couldnt be going over to dish out her food, we ordered ala carte for her. She also showed an unhappy face when we told her she has to sit at another table.She did not finish the food. This we also left it be as I felt that it would have been uncomfortable for her to eat at another table alone.

Yeesterday, she did her work really slowly and when I told her to bathe as we were bringing her out with us, then to fill up the flask and my son's waterbottle, she took her time to bathe and comb her hair and drink another cup of wwater and forgot to fill my son's waterbottle and we did not bring it along. We were out practically since mid-morning and half the time was spent sitting down. During lunch yesterday and the previous night, she again took my younger child to a somewhere where we cannot see her even though I told her many times she cannot walk away where we cannot see them.At night, at my parents place, she was only sitting there and watching my younger child who cannot walked yet. I saw her sitting quite a distance away and soon enough, he knocked his head because of her negligence and I told her before to watch him and catch him if he was going to knock his head. and she continued to stay in the air-con room after I came out with both my children and show no intention of going back into the room. I was so pissed I asked my mother to switch off the aircon and opened the door. Then she slowly came out and did not offered to look after my younger child, just sat there and watched TV. I could have attribute all this to tiredness but there she was at night, doing her own stuff past midnight.

This morning, after we went marketing, walked and waited far away twice when she knew well I was stopping for a while to buy something and I was carrying my youngest son. and when we came back, she can asked me if the chicken needs to be chopped up despite having done so for the past month.

And to think she was so delighted when I said she could wear the dress and shoe that I thought that it was fine to do so since she has vastly improved, knows how to conduct herself. Now I realised I should not have allowed her to do so.

Yesterday, my friend commented that she's quite good, has initiative. I agreed then. but now that I think back, it is because my husband was around and can observe her conduct. As many times, when my husband says something like let her do, she will immediately volunteer. And that's why she refuse to sleep in the car on the trip to the wedding and when we get back home before dinner despite me telling her she can do so.
 
my maid who has heard me using the word "diaper" for the past month, can pass me tissue and bib when I asked for diaper.

Amazingly, when I said she was going for interview today she could understand the word interview and asked me if it is in myanmese. I really salute her. This morning she was just behaving like she has forgotten what tasks she has to do despite having a list of task and being with us for more than a month
 
My 1st mynmar maid, I brought her to agency after 2 weeks for councelling. On 3rd week I sent her back to the agency. That evening, she simply refuse to work. Few days before. i received a letter that she was to attend an interview. In these 10 years hiring about 7 maids, including those awful ones that i kept for 2 - 3months and one that worked 6 yrs and another 2 yrs, I've never had a single interview.

I really think that Myanmar not suitable for maids, not really domesticated. I'm now on my 2nd Myanmar maid, she has also broken things around the house. She 4 months (5 items) and my 1st Maynmar maid 3 weeks (broken 5 items) have broken more things than my 5 Indo maids added together in 10 years. Always having problems with the front door lock, yanking the key before it is fully in or out of the key hole. And also kay kiang, do this and that, cutting corners and spoil things.

She fiddled with my bathroom lights just now and I can't get it to work. Then, no lights, she just took the cleaning stuff and walked out, so no need to clean my bathroom?!?!?! I told her she still has to clean, in the dark, even if she purposely spoil the lights.

I just quit job and staying home now so I as I watch her work these few weeks, I realized that she has not been doing her chores as instructed when I was at work. She has been cutting corners and not familiar with her chores. Previously, when i reached home, she has done all the chores, most days, I'm too tired to check. Sometimes, i jsut let it go.

Now, it seems that Indo maids are going to be short in supply.

I really hope the retirement resorts will be built soon, very soon and more of them.
 
That's why I am unhappy with MOM. Give me undue stress, waste my family members time, create additional expenses by randomly selecting my maid. I was not complained against and have not hired 4 maids in a year. Why am I the one bearing the cost. If MOM wants to interview maid through no fault of mine, they should bear te cost of transporting her to and fro and on top of that, it should not be done durin mon-fri working hours where this really inconveniences te whole family.
 
Do any of you have issues with neighbors or friends giving red packet during CNY or stuff to you maids, or am I the only one? How do you deal with it?

Last week,my neighbour gave my maid a mango. I was quite upset and thought about CNY when my husband's relatives and husband's friend gave ang pow to her. If she is worthy, I don't mind. These people only come around once a year. They don't know what my maid put me through.

My husband's sister wanted to give the maid ang pow, I told her no twice and she still insisted until i raised my voice and said no, then she relented. When I visit my friends or relative, i always ask them if their maids deserve any angpow or if the maid having money will cause any problem for my friend/relative. I feel that I'm a guest in their house, I should respect them, it's more important than custom or showing generousity.

My previous good maids, I always sing their praises and would feel happy for them when they receive angpow, no issues.

This maid is a stranger to them, they are a guest in my house, what's that about?!?!?
I don't go around and complain about my maid to everyone i know, but when they come to my house as a guest, shouldn't they ask me first beofore giving money?
 
My relatives would ask before giving. Sometimes, I think you need to tell them the problems you are facing with maid. Like my closer relatives like sisters etc, I pre-empt them 1st and tell them to let me know if they give. Since i'm still keeping her money for her. Then when someone gives to her, I make sure that she did say happy new year or thank them. In front of relatives, I would tell her she don't say, she don't get. This is all about respect.

I wasn't happy with my maid but since
 
My relatives are ok as I see them often and they know about my maids and what's going on in my life.

It's my husband's relatives that I only see once a year when they come to my house on CNY. They can't even tell if my maid is the same person or not. Then they give me this look like I'm the bad person, been mean and calculative to my maid when I tell them not to give angpow to my new maid.

I don't want the maid to have extra money that I don't know about in case she do funny things. I want to avoid any possible misunderstanding with the maid and money. I provide sundries and stuff for her.
 
I would pre-empt them too in dialect once they come in. Most people start going angbao only once they have been in the house for a while.

And just tell them, just don't want more problems with them. But I do agree, new maids when they get angbaos, tend to give more problems. Mine too, start behaving like she's equal don't do her work properly.
 
What make you all change maid or not to keep the maid ?
My Myanmar maid with me for 6 months and she is very terrible in her communication.
Now improves a bit but a few times she did thing without permission eg use my clothes dryer .
I m thinking shd I keep her or just get a new one?
 
1. Attitude but will overlook this if general work is good.
2. Stealing, bringing strangers into my Hse
3. Obvious bad work not due to not being trained or miscommunication

Just ask your maid why she did that and warn her never to let you catch her doing that.My maid also keep washing her clothes before she finished her work on top of bad work, Came up with lousy excuse, got scolded by me, did so again and got warned by agent. Finally, I told her if you behave like that again, I'm sending you back. 2 weeks of bliss.
 
I agree with tinklestar on her 3 points.

The correct attitude for a maid would be to understand that this is a job. She is to FOLLOW INSTRUCTIONS, do a job and get paid.

If she constantly refuse to follow instructions and do things against your instructions repeatly like once or twice every week, you have to ask yourself if you are willing to give in/overlook this attitude as she is good in her work and you are satisfied with her work.
 
Kekeke, tinklestar, the ask for diaper get bib n tissue thing is funny! Lol

It happens... Really.. Sometimes when my myanmese maid does that, I'd wonder if she really don't understand, or is just acting stupid.

Last month, I asked my helper to put the raw chicken meant for the porridge into the fridge. She put it on to the children's writing desk..... I simply walked away expressionless and continued prepping for my meeting. My two year old told the maid "fridge! Fridge!" and the little child went to open the fridge door open till the maid put the chicken in.

Kids are such darlings, and they are the reason that keeps us going in midst of.......
 
To add, this helper had been with our household for one year and three months when she suddenly forgot the word fridge.

It impresses us when she sometimes can hardly understand and communicate in English, and yet sometimes speaks relatively fluent English. My friends who sometimes come over to visit have commented on how bright and fluent my helper is with them. My helper was asking them on how to go to Peninsula Plaza, where to buy cheap iPhone, how much my ring costs, etc.
 
But she is clever. My favorite pieces of jewelry do not disappear. Only a couple of those that I don't really like.

Sigh... I try to close one eye and I want to keep the harmony and status quo as my youngest is still young, so continuity is important. But one thing I never compromise on : children's well-being. That was why my first maid was arrested by the cops.

As my eldest child would always say: 6 policemen, 1 policewoman and 1 crime scene photographer.

She was three plus when the maid was arrested for multiple counts of theft and child abuse. My eldest has video graphic memory too, so it's easier for her to remember things. Womb time too. Not flattering when your kid tells friends how dark, loud and noisy it was when she was inside you...
 
Hi Nelle,

I'm surprised that you still keep the maid even though she steals. What happen to my Sis was this. Her maid was going home so a few months before, she stole what she thought was a diamond earring, sew it in Teddy bear and try to courier home. My Sis checked before allowing her to do so and found the earring. Maid claim Teddy bear given by friend. So my Sis let it pass cause it was only a crystal earring and she felt it was enough of a warning. Then after maid went home, she found her few thousand dollars watch missing... My point is, if she can steal small things, she will eventually move on to big things...

I laughed at the way you described your eldest memory. Very smart children these days. Very sorry to hear you had a abusive maid. That's why I never dare to leave my children alone with the maid.

Oh yes, if my maids abuse my children, I will definitely report to the police. Maids nowadays really think employers can be bullied. All my maids at some point have always try to pass heavy stuff for me to carry while they carry light stuff.

Btw, what happen to the maid who abuse your eldest?
 
Hi,
Would like to check.. My helper going back home visit next week, is it a must to make an appointment at the embassy website, to pay her tax ($25 per month)?

Thanks all.
happy.gif
 
Hi tinklestar, sorry, was swamped with client work, reply lag. the first maid was a philipina.

Long story, police case, they were very very helpful, child went for head CT scan then. She was very very brave. Thank God she was alright... Thank God...
 
My current helper, I need to maintain the status quo at home. She is bright and has flaws but has strengths too. Need to be managed.

Like one of my tai tai friends say, all maids have their expiry dates. It's a matter of when.

She is bright enough to put back the money discretely when
she saw me counting. Those were company funds my staff passed me in an envelope then, so I knew how much it held.


She saw me counting and asked me what happened, I said i dunno, like something not right, maybe baby took it and distributed the notes to her dolls. She said must be. I said, must be too. So I said, never mind, mama now go Bt Timah and drive Jie Jie home, later you mop floor, you help me find, ok, if you can find, u help me put back ok? She ask me how many notes, iI say dunno, must ask my accountant coz he counted, she said ok mama.

I counted in office later that day after kids were home with maid n mom, the money had been replaced.
 
I realized that there are certain relationships where we can demand total integrity and character. Some that we need to learn to manage and increase the integrity quotient by and by.

Learning that gotta choose my battles. Can't fight all in one shot...
 
To be honest, I can't believe you kept her. She must have taken quite a lot and she didn't intend to return all from your description of the whole thing.

She might have taken many other things you were unaware of..

But I can understand sometimes for the children, just have to close 1 eye...

Btw, what I mean was was your 1st maid charged in court and jailed? I have heard stories whereby maid was reported to police for stealing but eventually was only repatriated.
 
I don't think my current maid took a lot. The first maid was a lot worse. Nonewithstanding, I'm not saying that theft in any form is right. Taking anything that is not yours in wrong.

Yes, you are right, I'm sure there are things that I'm not aware of. But, having to weigh the odds and the greater good of the situation, keeping her for as long as feasible for now till the end of the year when her contract ends is the most practical solution. Wasn't and isnt easy for me to "close one eye", but I try to look at it from larger perspective.

Sigh... It is not easy... A lot more stories to share even just on this one maid. But she does have her strengths. Thus I try to overlook. Need to manage her. Then again, don't we have to do the same for all employees. This is why I keep an open mind.
 
That first maid, she was the one who admitted to her countless misdeeds and thievery. Amazing how God answers prayers.

Police were sure they had a good case, etc, etc. We even had recordings of her confessions, loot recovered etc.

After all the embassy stepping in fiasco, she was released from remand and held in Embassy instead and it seemed like she had a reasonably good time as a tourist before getting repatriated. Although she was blacklisted and all, but we felt that this was perhaps one of the cases where justice was not seen done to the fullest strength of what the law was intended to cater for.

To sum, it was a saga. And it reinforces how careful we as employees have to be when we select helpers as the current stance of the situation holds little fairness or protection for employers.

The charges were numerous.
 
With the right lobbying done when good people do band together for a good and valid cause, I believe that the situation will change. But till then, we just need to watch out for each other's back and support each other in what way we can.

My friends are awesome. Even one of my PIs whom I had to hire for the current maid (can you imagine why I had to do that....)... But I had to know the truth from falsehood. And I did find out.

I didn't expose her but gave her a way to back down from her ploy. She was smart. She backed down and recommitted to completing her contract with reasonable behavior with her signing of a simple document that states her new stance and her withdrawal of all previous stories and requests. With a witness, of course.

This maid does have her strengths. She is clever. Yes, I know this can be a flaw too..
 


Oh dear. Are your maids highly educated? I never had problems of theft, somehow, my maids had integrity with regards to honesty though they might have lied on other things. All I faced was bad attitude and bad work.

But maids nowadays are different from what they used to be 5 years ago. At least when my Sis ex-maid steals, she still does her work and take care and educated her charge well and did not take big sums of money.
 
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