(2013/11) November 2013

Aftnn ladies!!

Fuzzybear/kayliz,
True, i have friend who bfeed her gal but she falls sick often too. However, its v rare la. Most bfed babies tend to be healthier. There is always a few odd one out but benefits of bfeeding still outweight fm =p
N there are those who feel tat chubbier baby are cuter so choose to give fm. I have someone told me this before.

Fuzzybear,
Hows are u 1st day back at wk??

Febie,
Aft i delivered my #1, i had v bad rashes the whole body. V itchy n it was also during the hottest mth of the yr. gynae says its due to hormones n nthing i can do except if i wanna take steriod. He advised against it as i was bfeeding. I lived with it and persists in bfeeding n lucky only lasted a mth.

Fuzzybear,
Mayb ur friend used to having her own freedom n gd life tat she just throws everything to her helper n cont to enjoy her life. Wait till her kid the helper 'mummy' instead of her and see how she reacts.
I am against having helper so i do everything on my own. Even nw with #3 on the way i told my hb i dun wan a helper.

Kayliz,
Ur mil ultimate! I feel uncomfortable even with my own mum watching me bfeed. I nv allowed mil and will nt allow her to watch me bfeed. This is privacy and she has to respect me for tat even if she is the elder. She has wat i have, there is nthing extra or special for her to see =p

SN,
Totally feel u! Aft i pop all i wan is privacy and to rest. Staying even aft visiting hrs for a few hrs is so inconsiderate. If wanna chat can go somewhere else n chat la. Give the tired mummy a rest. Oh, my in laws came back again at 10pm and it pissed me soooo much. 
So for my #2, i rejected all requests to visit me and/or baby in hosp. And gd thing is my gynae allowed me to discharge on the 2nd day =)

Mummychua,
Congras on ur baby boy. Hope watever test u opt for, things will turn out fine.

Xiaober,
I did b wax when i was in my 38weeks and it was soo painful! And for almost a week aft i wax, the area was red n sore. Duno if i dare to do it again this time. Mine are natural deliveries but the hosp nv shave/cut for me. I duno abt the other hosps tho.

Min81,
Sprout husks pillows suppose to be like security item for baby to prevent them from scares due to sudden movements/sounds. U have to sun the pillow often to prevent it from getting moist. But gt to constantly chk on the baby. Coz when baby kick/wiggle/flinch or move, scare tat the pillow may cover the face n suffocate. 
 


mummychua: glad to hear that you are able to push fwd the tests and know the results earlier.. Talk to your little one and stay strong!

Any #2 or #3 time mummy who previously did confinement without CL? Can share your experience? Is it managable? Went home ytd, my sis & aunt keep persuading me to get a CL so a little jittery now if I will be able to manage or not.
 
Hi Fuzzybear, wishing you a good day at work today.

Hi Xiao ber,
I went to strip for waxing... I find that during pregnancy, my threshold for pain higher.
so I will still be gg to them for waxing before resuming my IPL after the bfg journey.

Val, you are good. Really persists huh.
my friend was on steroid thus gave up bfg. she tot after giving birth the itch will go. Guess it's too much for her to tahan.
 
Kris: just to share, i did have my mum helping with my confinement, but based on my experience most prob u can do without a CL.

My hubby wasn't staying with me during my confinement. My mum cooked my meals, bathed baby, helped to wash me and baby clothes, prepared herb water for me to shower daily and helping to wash bottles. Of coz when i am showering or having my meals she will also attend to my baby if needed. At night i handle the baby alone so sleep was very limited, as i still had to feed and express milk in between. Then i gotta wash and sterilize the pumps to prepare for next cycle.

This time round, i am getting a CL coz i want to acc my #1 more, and for the 1st month i would want the CL to look after the bb at night in order for me to have more rest.

Is this your 1st child? If u intend to make do without a CL, you can most probably cope with the help of your hubby and confinement catering. For showering wise, to me bathing with herb water is not necessary. I bathed normally after 1 week coz i couldnt stand the herbs.

Will anyone be with you if your hubby is working? I would think u might need someone to help to bathe your bb.. some ppl say cant touch tap water during confinement. for me i only followed everything strictly for 1 week. Then subsequently i start to go back to my normal routine.
 
Kayliz, SN, Febie, disciplining kids is really hard.. too harsh and u worry u scar them for life.. too soft and u are afraid they become spoilt brats. i do think in general, we have become more gentle with our kids. esp in the light of all those research that showed that kids that had corporal punishment grew up to have behavioural and learning issues. Coincidentally, i find that most of these research are done in the West. In the East, where caning is very much a part of all our childhood and we don't have as high a crime rate as those other countries. makes me wonder if we are doing something right other than just caning.

I do have a cane for my son but i rarely use it.. may be once every half a yr. i reserve it for very serious 'offenses' like being rude to grandparents, big tantrums and hitting of other kids. i won't use the cane on learning (like doing his writing properly etc) but when i m frustrated i do smack his hands. btw me and my hb, i use the cane more partly because my hb is very into positive teaching etc. if he takes out the cane, my son knows it is very serious.

Snake_BB, aiyoh poor thing u.. can't slp.. i m thankful i don't have such prob

Silver, i m curious why u didn't op to see Dr Anandan to seek his advice on your low amniotic fluid issue?

Re: brazilian wax
Definitely painful.. i think now still can do it but in ur 3rd trim, docs usually say don't do it until abt 36 wks. cos the pain might trigger labour pain.

Mummychua, all the best for ur amnio. Do update us.. if u are feeling sian and unable to concentrate, come and unburden ur worries to us. don't keep it in.

Val, Febie, thanks! feeling tummy ache.. not sure if i ate something wrong but it isn't cramps.. keep gg to the loo to check. met my ex-bosses and they asked me if i wanna transfer back to their dept cos it is more paperwork than my current one which has more site work. My ex-boss just commented i lost a lot of weight (which is true cos i have been puking a lot).

Val, same as me. i insist on doing everything for my sons myself even though i m so tired. but now that i m bleeding,

Kris, if u are the kan cheong type then best u get a CL.. might be just gd to get some experience. if u are the very steady type and ur hb is the same, then i think u shd be able to cope.
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only u would know if u can cope lor.
 
i did it without a CL for both my #1 and #2 coz they popped during CNY period, and the charges were crazy...
my mum cooked for me, hubby/massage lady helped me bathed the baby... the rest of the time, i am on my own, baby sleep, i try to nap, or surf the net for full month stuff...
managable if the baby is easy to handle... (my #1 cries every now and then, didnt sleep through... my #2, was ok... drink milk and sleep...)
 
My son had fever last night 38.9, have nurofen n went to sleep. Since he slept so well, i didnt disturb him till 630am and the fever was 40.2! Gosh! Shock of my life. Gave him alternate nurofen and para since morning, completing the bpbp cycle soon. We didnt even know he was having a fever cos he was still happy and playing, n he didnt feel that hot. Gosh, touch is deceiving!

Took a whole day leave today, now at gynae waiting for my turn.
 
Regarding shaving, my hospital didnt do any shaving for me when i delivered #1. So its the first time i heard that u have to shave to deliver naturally. Isnt shaving down there v itchy and might cause rashes instead?
 
Thanks fuzzybear, I think I'm still quite cool abt it. Hub is the on that is quite loss. He don't understand all these medical stuff so he kind of don't know what to expect. The good thing is we have not really annoounce the pregnancy yet. So no one will be asking abt it. Otherwise I don't know if I can tahan all the concern.

Disciple, I got a cane at home but it's strictly meant for my dog not my gal. At just 3yr old, I don't think caning really work. I'm a very strict mummy so with just my voice and deadly stare my gal willbehave liao. There is once when she is abt 2, we bought her shopping at toyrus, she eye on a doll stroller and insist on buy but I didn't wanted to buy it for her as I know that there r cheaper ones. She thrown a huge tantrum and the whole store is looking at us. I don't care a shit and drag her out of store. From then on she Nv ask me to buy toys for her.
 
Kayliz: ur MIL very cute also.. watch you bfeed..and now comment on ur tummy.. hahaa..

Fuzzybear: u back to work? good good! means you're getting better! jiayou!

SN: first time shaving is itchy.. but if it's not your first time shaving den should be ok.. i dont dare to do brazilian waxing.. im scared of pain.. so i only shave.. not as clean as waxing la.. but no choice.. hahaha
 
SN, have fun seeing ur beanie.. hehe.. ur poor boy.. is he better today?

Mummychua, oh dear.. i think it must have came as a shock to ur hb.. esp if he doesn't really understand the medical terms and implications. Oops am i being too irritating enquiring abt ur? hehehe.. I don't cane my dog at all though he can be quite stubborn.. i feel bad hitting my dog cos he isn't human and won't understand human expectations.. so far, my son has nv asked us to buy anything (not even once) when we are out. my #1 is indeed more guai, usually eye power is enough to keep him in line. When he has tantrums outside, usually it is due to food.. he can't finish and eats very slow, causing me to lose my temper and he will start crying.. or he simply refuses to eat at all.

Winkle, yes back today.. i haven't bled since 2 Sats ago.. but i thought i stay at home last wk to make sure everything stabilised. anyway i can't be working long term at home.. ppl will always comment.

Re: shaving for natural birth
They only shave the sides (inner thigh area), near the vagina to allow easier cutting and stitching. cleaner for us too when we leave hospital. they don't shave the top at all. that's for c-sec.
 
Kayliz, Fuzzybear, DPW: tks for the advice and ur sharing.. I will be moving back to my mum place. So day time, shouldn't be a problem to rest as my parents will help me look after. First week, hub will take leave to stay overnight to help out, aft that should be pretty much on my own. I was thinking shouldn't be much of a prob since if I decide to bf, I will most probably be waking up every 2-3 hours too. Maybe i shall catch more slp in the Day.

SN: once you get the hang of shaving, it wont be itchy till it starts growing.

Winkle: hi 5! I also shave coz I scared of waxing pain!
 
Hi mummies! So many interesting topics...

Regarding shaving, I did a c-sec and the nurse shaved off the front part for me only. Think it's better to remove the hair, else first few weeks the lochia will be quite messy. I was thinking of trying brazilian waxing for a few months before I tested positive, but no guts hehe... so I only trim with scissors :p

Discipline-wise, I don't use a cane. My daughter is the eat soft don't eat hard type. I tried hitting her butt and hand before, completely no response but I can bring her to tears just by talking to her sternly (not even shouting). Now she will ask me every day if she is "a lot good girl" then if she did something naughty during the day, I will remind her and explain why it's naughty and she will promise not to do it again. The problem is sometimes I need to explain 10 times and really testing my patience haha...

mummychua, hope things turn out fine for you.

During confinement, my mil will also just walk in to the room to see me bf and chat... really awkward! Lucky she didn't visit everyday, Anyway, I always wore a big t-shirt and only exposed a bit.
 
i am so tempted to extend my ML to 6 mths (take 2 mths unpaid). i wish to spend more time with my kids, esp #1.. i really still feel sad that she has to go childcare and wish to pick her earlier from school daily.
 
Silver and kitkat, just recvd a call to trf to novena medical centre for fa too. My appt is this wed so will update u gals kn the experience..doc prefers to do fa at 19 weeks dunno y.

Fuzzybear, prof ananda nurse told me early genetic scan is before 15weeks but need one more detailed scan which is carried out at 22 weeks coz certain congenital problems can only be detected then.
 
kayliz: don be sad la.. i think childcare is not a bad place la.. provided the teachers are genuinely good la.. coz i feel that the kid can learn to be independent, and the teachers there will teach them new stuff daily.. and most imptly, they wun spoil the kid..coz they cant give 100% attn to each and everyone..

i dont think my mum will teach my bb things de lor.. for sure she will spoil her, let her watch tv, den give her all the attn she wan..and if she throw tantrum, my mum sure give in de..and she wun teach her all the good habits, her excuses will be..aiyo so small nvm one la.. plus my mum dont speak fluent english nor mandarin..lolz.. so my gal will absorb all the "chia ba lang" language..she still can say nxt time put bb with her.. fri, sat & sun then i look after.. i can't imagine what my gal will become..lolz..
 
SN, hope your elder boy recovers soon. Usually fever will return in the evening, so today until tmr, must diligently feed medicine.

Fuzzybear, I dun use the cane too unless the offences are big. Usually when I blow my top and he hit my limit he can see the cane hitting the pillow. my hb will nv use cane on my boy.. He's the one spoiling the kid while i'm the discipline mistress at home. Hope your tummyache ease. Your ex-boss so nice. my current boss knows abt my pregnancy but nv once ask how I feel. he has adopt the heckcare attitude since he will step down in Sept.

DPW, my boy was borned during CNY period too. and it was way too expensive to employ CL. But that confinement also shows that I dun eat much. Thus this round, I told my mum I wont be doing confinement at her pl.
Prefer to do at home so that I dun interrupt my boy's life for a month. He loves sleeping at our home unless I have to travel.
So my mum say she will cook dinner and bring over to me. Lunch I can be easy. Guess I rather spend my time mooing... hahaha...And I have to be the one who send my boy to the childcare centre too since my hb has to leave for work at irregular hours.
 
kayliz, dun be sad. You sure have time for #1. newborn sleeps most of the time. was telling my boy that we will make baby slp early then we can play. hahaha... he's so excited. some days he will place his hand on my mini bump and ask bb what are u doing... then sing and dance...
 
Kris,
Me. I didnt engage cl for the past 2 confinements. My hb and my parents helped me out. For #1, hb helped with the baby n housework, my dad did the cooking n my mum did the laundry for baby n myself. For #2, hb helped out for 1st 2 weeks with nb and #1. My mum did the laundry for nb and myself. I catered confinement meals as my dad too bz with work to help out. When my hb went back to work i took over caring of nb and #1 as well as housework. Bottles washing n sterilising i did on my own. When my mum fell sick i took over the laundry on my own. I am nt those can rest the whole day type so this kind of confinement suits me and i can manage. However, frankly, it can gets alittle tiring esp the body is still recuperating. This round, am still doing without cl. 
If 1st time mum and nt much help from parents u probably may wanna get a cl to help out and learn some tricks or 2 on how to handle baby. If u have help from hb and parents and nt a 1st time mum u can probably do without one unless u intend to do a gd confinement where u dun do anything and just rest well n nirse the baby.

Febie,
Yes. Probably the itch was too much for her to bear. Mayb my itch nt as bad as her ba. Or perhaps i was too stuborn tat i wanna bfeed my #1 to throw in the towel.

Fuzzybear,
Agrees. Its really hard disciplining kids. Too soft and they start climbing all over u. I am always the devil at hm. Lol. Coz i face them most of the time. Hb is always the angel coz he is usually bz with work or sometimes overseas for a period of time thus he has limited time with them. He usually gives in to them n will do the fun things with them while i do the coaching more.
Gd tat its nt cramps and so far so gd =) Hope the day will be smooth for u =) are u considering to trf back to the old dept or stay on in the current?
U didnt complete ur sentence? Now tt u r bleeding u try to get ur dad to help out? Have to la coz u are facing some complications and gynae already u to rest more. When u are better or aft u pop u can cont to do more with the kids =)

Kayliz,
Yes. I think its a gd idea to extend ur ml. Go and have a discussion with ur boss =)
#1 will feel the drastic change when there is a new member. Must spend more time with her to reassure her.
 
SN,
40.2 is really high!!! Have his fever come dwn? Hope he will recover soon.

Winkle,
Grandparents are usually the 'spoilers'. Lol. They are more stern with us (the children) than the grandchildren. Ya, old ppl to say tat kids too young bleah bleah but all things start from young mah.

Febie,
Yes. I used to tell my #1 tat if he wans me to give him 100% attention he has to stop disturbing the sis n let her slp =p
My #2 likes to kiss my tum tum and sing songs to the baby too =)
 
Val: ya lor.. grandparents are the spoiler.. juz like how my grandma spoilt me..lolz.. super spoilt by her..hahahah..
 
Hi fuzzybear: re. dr ananda for low amniotic fluid check
oh forgot to update, yes i actually thought of going to dr. ananda for my detailed scan but my chk up last week actually went pretty well.
baby growing well, can see him/her bouncing ard, heartbeat still strong and i asked my gyane if my fluid is still considered low.
he mentioned that it will be more ideal if i have a bit more fluid but my current level is not really a low low fluid situation to worry about and especially it's not affecting baby's growth, there's nothing to worry about.
hence we stick to the normal detailed scan our clinic has arranged for us at novena medical centre.
maybe unless the results from my detailed scan not so good then go see dr. ananda?
or is there anything i shld worry about for now and go see dr. ananda first?
anw my appt is in 10 days so i can always double chk w my gyane again...

Hi millie
oh yes do keep us informed of your experience at novena medical ctr! not sure how experienced the sonographers are man...
 
xuan, think my hb sometimes purposely do that.
last nite was the first time my boy did it. Guess he's pretty excited too.
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Re: CL
I think different people would have different experience. i personally think it really depends on how strong u are, the pressure around u and if u have an easy baby or not. For me i had a CL for my #1 because i really wanted to concentrate on bf-ing. my CL did bulk of the cooking so i think if u cater, it shd be managable. she did the bathing too but hb took over so she didn't do much. though my CL can be very irritating, there are things that she helped like giving me a bit more confi.. i didn't know how to see if my bb was dehyrated but she taught me to see. also i had the impression baby drink milk, nappy change = happy baby.. couldn't understand why bb was crying. she helped explained that it is normal. Plus i couldn't latch so i needed somebody to jagar my baby while i pump. so if u are the kan cheong type then having a CL might give u a bit more confidence.
happy.gif
after that i think u won't need a CL for ur subsequent preg.

Millie, looks like my gynae told me different things. he told me basically at different stages can do the scan cos the doc will be checking different things. weird.. oh well. thanks for updating me.

Febie, my co in general is very pro family.. my ex-bosses are lagi more pro family cos they are very close to their kids. it sort of rubbed down to everybody that worked in my ex dept. that dept very pro family. The biggest boss's wife is a director at MCYS (can't rem what's the new ministry called) plus they are devout Catholics so every baby to them is precious.

Val, my c-sec pain is starting to hurt again! last time i bled, my c-sec scar was hurting for 3 days.. not sure if i m walking more than usual or what. If i can, i wanna move back to my old dept. partly cos it is a lot more focus and we know what we are supposed to be doing. bosses are definitely friendlier. in my new dept, the ppl here don't really care abt ur personal well being.. my current boss nv once sms me to check if i m ok during my hospitalisation. things here also very haphazard. always putting out fires instead of anticipating them.

Ya my parents are helping out now. Sorry i m typing and talking to cols.. so didn't finished. i wanted to say that i used to insist that i do everything for my sons. even now i feed every meals, every bottle of milk. i can't shower my sons now cos i need to squat and bend over so i had to hand it to my maid. i feel really sad abt it because i hardly do anything for my younger son except to feed him. even milk, he will hold his own bottles. can't play with him much cos i m not very mobile and he is at the stage where he is walking and exploring his environment.
sad.gif
what i m scared of is that after that he gets used to my maid doing stuff for him and doesn't want me to do it anymore.

Silver, ah i see.. i think there's no need for u to worry for now since ur doc already said ur level is just a bit low but still within the normal range.
happy.gif
go for ur scheduled detailed scan first. don't worry too much.
 
Hola mummies,

Thank you for the warm welcome and kind words.
happy.gif

Yes, double blessing indeed.. anyway we always wanted more so we're not gonna 'close shop' after these babies.

val: we're the same age!
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Re: CL
This might sound silly but we decided against a CL for the twins. Hubby will be taking one month off to be 'Confinement Hubby'. (thinking of printing an apron for him that says that.)
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Will stay at my parents place for the first month plus, and their maid will do all the cleaning and laundry. My mum, MIL and maid will take turns to cook. Hubby will prepare the longan red date tea.. Is there anything else I should look out for?
 
Fuzzybear, don't say that. Somehow internet has taken the awkwardness out of this situation. It's just different when u talk abt this kind of thing in real life.

Wisdom tooth, somehow during pregnancy my wisdom tooth start 'growing' again. I'm getting worry that it will hit my molar. If it really do I will be in trouble. We are not suppose to do wisdom tooth extraction during pregnancy rite? Not just my wisdom tooth, I think my keloid is growing too.
 
sbmummy, I like your hubby. He wants to get involved. One of my friends, her hb also took leave to be the confinement daddy.
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Fuzzybear, good mah. mine although got family but he expects I check email etc over holidays, etc. he not happy when I need to take leave etc.
 
Val, hee hee thanks for sharing the sleeping one. with another mummy assurance, I think it will work.
happy.gif
 
Hello mummies! Glad everyone is doing good!

Fuzzybear - good to hear tt u r back to work. Seems like ur ex dept is much more better. See u can talk to ur ex boss to transfer back? It always feel happier to hav nice coll ard u tt truly care abt u n e work load as well. Running to site is really tedious for a preg lady.

Val - how u cope w e kids wo helper? U send them to childcare?

Re: waxing
I read somewhere tt waxing is much more painful for preg lady den not preg lady. I nv wax before. Only trim. I guess I jus cut short hair before I go delivery. Cos I scare pain..later scream likr mad woman over there. Haha..

Re: confinement lady
This is my 1st preg. So I will b getting CL since I got no experience. I saw someone said cannot touch water! How to brush teeth or after going toliet, dun need wash hands?

Re: infant care
Anyone send e bb after 4 mth of ML to infant care? Care to share? I staying w my FIL but he is quite old aldy so I dun tink I wan to hire a maid for my bb n my FIL oversees. My mama is working but she said willing to retire for me. I felt bad. And my hubby oso commented tt dun wan to ma fan my mama. Seems like only infant care or nanny hse option r avaliable. But infant care I read is 1 to 5 bb. Like Not v focus on taking care of my bb. Still haven't decide who is gg to look after my bb..how I wish I can stop work for 2 yrs till my bb become toddler den go child care. I will b an xin le..

Mummychua- B strong! Keep talking to ur bb. Cannot pluck wisdom tooth? Maybe can check w ur gyne abt it?
 
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Pinky (pinkyloving)
my #2 is still in infant care, going to transfer to toddler class in aug...
#3, i think will go into infant care too...

infant care is good, if the teachers are good... but i have heard of bad ones too... i am thankful for the infant care teachers that my #2 have... they are able to teach and educate her, and prepare her for the next stage at child care.
at least the center has to be responsible for the kids... everything done, is recorded down on a daily basis...
we get a chance to see what the infants do at school too during meet the parents session... art and craft, play, outdoors, etc...
the teachers do guide us as parents too, as to how much to let them eat, if they are ready to transit to solid, motor skills, etc...
if you want infant care, i think its good to put on wait list already...

i wanted nanny, but my ils were against it, esp if nanny looks after too many kids, they dont have much of a responsiblilty too... they can dont answer to alot of things... nanny, might not be able to teach the kids too... but there are good nannies too... if want nanny, better to be by recommendations... anyway, nanny pricing and infant care after subsidy doesnt really differ alot...

i wanted maid, but no one wants to be responsible for the maid, and i wont have a peace of heart leaving the kids and the maid alone at home...
 
Pinky, i'm also contemplating between ifc n nanny now, i'm ok with both, looking more at availability.

Nanny wise, will probably find my mum's friends who is also my neighbour. i grow up knowing that aunty n she has raise her kids well so i feel more at ease letting her look after my baby. plus she's only staying downstairs of me, sending n fetching baby will be easy. for nannies i feel u need to find someone that u can trust if not will keep worrying if ur baby is well taken care of.

ifc wise, i like it that it's 1:5. meaning my baby wont be over pampered cos the teachers got no time to fuss over him everytime he cries. this is also my concern with nanny cos nanny is 1:1, i dun really wish for my baby to grow up to be overly pampered. but for ifc, if baby falls sick they will ask parents to bring the baby home i think. then will headache cos these are usually emergency/ last min cases. overall, both have pros n cons for me, so i haven't really decided yet.
 
Pinky: Can touch water, but cannot touch tap water... so there always need to be a pail of cooled boiled water in the bathroom for brushing teeth or washing hands.
But actually for me, after a few days i dont care liao! It was too troublesome. I even showered every evening (it's a habit) coz i cannot stand going to bed with a sticky body.

I sent my #1 to infant care when she was 13 mths. She went to My First Skool. The ratio was 1 teacher to 3 babies.
I find the teachers good and they really love the kids. During playtime, the smaller babies will be placed on the rocker and those who are crawling/walking will be placed in a play corner with partition so they dont tumble over the babies.
The babies also sleep in a separate room with cots.

With a caregiver, they like to carry the baby like 24/7... once the baby gets used to being held and cuddled, it's a big problem! My gal will cry whenever we place her on the bed.

I withdrew my child after the trial period coz she was not adapting well. But the principal did tell me it is best to put the kids in when they are 4-5 mths coz they still cant recognize faces so is less prone to separation anxiety.
Also, given that most childcare centres have a long waiting list, if your baby manages to get into the infant care, he/she will most likely have a place in the childcare.
Unlike my girl, on the wait list since Jan 2011 till now, I have not secured any vacancy in 2 of the childcare centres i wanted her to enrol in.
5 mths to EDD, I'm getting really worried!
 
kayliz: on wait list from Jan 2011 till now?? that's more than 2 yrs already leh! so kua zhang ah! looks like i need to consider this point when deciding between nanny n ifc. hmm...

there's a My First Skool behind my house block, when i called to enquire, the person told me i can just register 1st to be on the list. so i just went ahead n register since she says no obligations. haha.. i feel so kiasu leh.. but i needed a backup plan in case my neighbour doesnt want to help me look after my baby. =P
 
kayliz, I'm also thinking about extending my maternity leave until 6mths or more... my #1 is in full day childcare, but her school don't have infant care. My in laws said they can take care, but FIL said they will need a maid. hb and I have decided against a maid, as we did hire 1 during #1's time after I went back to work and in laws were taking care, and there's really nothing much for the maid to do at their place as they like to do everything themselves... so we decided the extra help wasn't worth all the maid problems. The benefit of having a maid though, was that she followed my feeding instructions strictly and will tell mil what she can and cannot feed my baby lol... so we are thinking of infant care, but maybe at 6mths
 
Gd morning mommies! weather so nice to slp in.. my body still not used to going to work, by last evening, my back was so achy!

Pinky, i don't have any experience with IFC personally. only can share what my frens who have sent their kids to IFC have been through. First u really gotta prepare for them to be sick more often. and when they are sick, u also gotta take leave to take care since IFC won't accept kids with fever (they accept kids with no fever but with cough and runny nose). for me i can't bear for my babies to be sick at such a young age so i actually sold my old house and move closer to my parents' place when i was 34 wks preg with #2. their health is more impt than anything else.

Although IFC is structured and there are many activities to do, at the initial first year, they really don't do much. not much learning either (simply because they don't have the mental capacity to do so). I personally do not like the routines of IFC cos i have my own fixed routine that i want my caregiver to follow. in IFC u gotta follow what the centre decides. for e.g. some centres let their kids nap until 4pm. that's a big no-no for me cos my kids slp at 8pm. my routine requires them to be up by 3pm.

I do agree that IFC trains the kids to be independent. and btw nanny, maid and IFC, IFC might be a better choice (unless u have somebody u can really trust as a nanny then I will prefer the nanny). This is bcos IFC is accountable and responsible for ur kid's safety. unlike nannies and maids, they are not answerable to govt agencies, not subjected to checks and regulations.

I don't have an answer for u but if u really can and if ur parents are willing, i would choose parents. independence can be trained at a later stage but i personally feel the baby's health MAY be affected if they keep falling sick. Not to mention i will go crazy taking care of my sick kiddos, not slping enough and still have to work full time!

Mummychua, some dentists do extractions during pregnancies but very very rarely. only on those suffering badly. where's ur keloid? how come it is acting up again?

Kayliz, i m also thinking of extending my ML but using my annual leave cos i got so many days! not because i miss my kiddos but i m so scared my dad cannot handle 3 kids!
 
xuan, i have already booked infant care at two centres 1 mth ago, 1 near PIL place, one near my parents place. but still on waiting list. haha kiasu mummy!
 
Xuan: exactly! The MFS near my home is located in a shopping mall next to the MRT station. That's why it is very popular due to the convenience.
Before that, i already knew the wait list is about 2 years. So i registered her in the waiting list since 2011. I just emailed to enquire about the status recently, she is still 20+ in queue!
And they mentioned, the only way there is vacancy is when an existing kid withdraws. But definitely no chance that 20 over kids will withdraw until it's my child's turn, right?

Fuzzybear: i spoke to my hubby last nite. He didnt support my idea of extending my ML..
sad.gif

My company does not allow us to bring-over our leaves so every year the annual leaves must all be utilized.
I will most prob only take 3.5 mths ML and save the rest to use when necessary.
 
Hi all,

my boy has been in Pat's Schoolhouse infant care since 12 months old. He's in the toddler class now. The school fees at Pats is really very expensive but at least they have a low teacher to child ratio which I feel is important, especially for IFC since babies are still very vulnerable. Wanted to transfer him to a more affordable childcare recently but i withdrew after just a day at that new childcare cos i couldnt accept the low hygiene i observed. I didn't see all these when i went to visit. so it was really a shock. I put my son back to Pats. For #2, I don't think i can afford both kids to be in Pats, have waitlisted at Learning Vision but the waiting list is crazy. My #1 was on the waitlist since 2011 as well and to date still no news. So I went to waitlist #2 last month and the vice principal said she cant confirm cos she hasn't settled the classes for 2014 yet. gosh. I couldn't believe it lor, cos i already went at 12weeks pregnancy, how can there not be any space already?
 
Winkle,
Lol. Nw ur parents' turn to spoilt ur kid =p

Silver,
Gd to hear ur amniotic fluid still within acceptance range. Mayb u try to drink even more water?? I have a friend who had the same prob and her gynae asked her o drink lots of water and it soon returned to normal level.

Fuzzybear,
*ouch* why is ur csect wound still hurting? Is it coz of expanding womb?? Or is it coz ur previous delivery is close to the current one?? Seriously, csect scares me more than natural delivery. 
Ya, cld be coz u have been resting and suddenly there is more movements thus causing the ache. Try to move lesser and slower ok. 
Gd tat ur ex dept is very pro family. Hope u will get a chance to move back to tat dept =)
Dun feel sad babe, its just a passing period tat u have to cut down on the physical things u do for him coz u are facing some complications. Can still do other things like reading him books, doing crafts tog or singing songs while he dance? 

Sbmummy,
How many kids do u and ur hb intend to have?
Oops! Did i reveal my age here? Hahaa.

Pinky,
I think i am one of those "tougher" ones. My boy goes to Morning session cc. Coz thats one of the better schs ard my area without having to travel too far or having him taking sch bus. My #2 is nt attending any daily sch yet but enrichment class. Suppose to put her on half day cc next jan but will postpone to mid yr or 2015. i feel tat she is too young for cc now and i cant bear to leave her whole day or even a few hrs away in sch. Its nt easy but its managable. Things will get tougher with #3. Hope i can still cope then =p
If u can take npl to look aft ur kid for a yr or 2 that will be gd. U get to witness many milestones.
If u wanna send ur baby to ifc, take note tat baby may fall sick more often as he/she is exposed to other kids and if they are dwn with flu n cough, ur baby may catch it also. Pros n cons la. Ifc at least is regulated and if anything u can still feedback or complain to an authority while with nanny u cant.
if u wan a gd ifc or reasonable priced one u sld put on waitling list already. Personally i dun prefer to send my kids to ifc. I prefer my kids to grow up in a hm environment by myself or my parents.
 
my son still having fever but i have to go back to work already. really lots of deadlines and backlog to clear. although boss has been very nice and supportive, but i cannot 得寸进尺 also lar. sigh. i think being a working mom is really not easy. I feel so guilty going to work this morning when my son kept wanting me to just hug him to comfort him. thank God i have help from my parents but they stay too far away to be taking care of my kids full time. can only call them on emergency cases.
 
IFC, actually i find it quite depressing to send kid there. i cant imagine myself being trapped in office for 8hrs. so i actually have no heart to put my kids there for 10-12hrs everyday. but sometimes as a working mummy, we do not have much choice with our childcare option.

so if the grandparents option is available, i feel that its a better choice. since they are the ones who will really give our kiddo their love and attention. of course there will be disagreement but we must close one eye. grandparents must respect the parents decision too.

fuzzybear, my wisdom tooth havent got the the extent that i have to extract it. really hope that it wont grow much otherwise it will really hit on the other tooth. my keloid is on my shoulder. it use to be a small dot. during my last pregnancy it grown to be abt 2cm long. it start getting itchy again. somehow not just bb growing inside me. my tooth and keloid grow too. lol...

actually im thinking of quitting. company isn't doing well and the funny thing is boss doesn't seems interested to improve things. no motivation to work sian.... but the idea of being a sahm scares me too.
 
Val,

Thanks for the info on sprout husks pillow
happy.gif
Will think abt it later then, looks like no hurry..

Kitkat,

Oh dear, hubby and i have not registered at the ifc near our block yet.. Was wondering if it's too early.. Looks like we better go get our bb on waiting list too.. Do we need to put deposit just to be on waiting list?

Mummychua,

Oh you have a keloid too.. I have quite a few but the ones on my neck and arm are fine.. I had 4 incisions on pelvic area from my laparoscopy last yr.. Lately i also feel that one of the scars is growing together with my tummy and getting puffier
sad.gif
 
sigh.. the dilemmas of a working mum. see lah.. this is the exact reason y sg birth rate is low. it's really hard to juggle. yes my kid shld come priority but also cannot neglect work cos if not where got money to support the kid? haiz...
 
Kayliz, why isn't ur hb supportive? is he worried abt the finances? oh my co allows us to bring our leave forward for 1 yr.. i haven't consume last yr's leave, plus still the 6 days childcare leave.. a bit paiseh to clear leave cos i have been on MC for so long!

SN, how was ur gynae check yesterday? can confirm gender already? hehe.. Lucky ur parents are willing to help.. have u thought of moving near ur parents? or having them move nearer to you?

Mummychua, I really agree about that part leaving the kid in IFC for 10hrs. i know at least with grandparents (well my parents and inlaws) they bring my kids out for walks when they run errands like going to supermarkets. i have to say grandparents dunno how to do things like crafts though. my mom will set simple household chores for my #1 like pluck beansprouts or make him sweep the floor (play play), fold clothes. Nonetheless not many ppl have the option of having grandparents who can and willing to take care of their kids for them.

Oops.. ur body parts are all growing together with ur baby!! my keloid from my c-sec is also itching.. haha trying not to scratch cos it is at my crotch area! don't quit now.. just tong temporarily until u finish ur ML.. at least u get paid maternity leave!

Val, my c-sec was a yr ago lor.. doc said can get preg 6 mths after c-sec. he said the pain i have is the scar stretching.. oh well.. really salute u for thinking of handling 3 kids alone in the future man.. i am a bit scared myself though i know when the time comes i will just do it.
 
Fuzzybear: with my #1 i only took ML for 3.5 mths. So he feels that i should be able to cope this time round too, moreover #1 is going childcare and i dont really have to look after 2 kids in the day.
Also, recently my SIL just told me that she managed to get 1 year leave (ML + extended unpaid leave) from her company. My hubby thinks i was "inspired" by her.
Financially wise, i thought since i wont be going out much during my ML, my 4 mths of paid ML should be able to cover my expenses for 6 mths.
 
Fuzzybear,

It's really nice you have your parents and in laws to help.. My mil is active type and enjoying life, will not be tied down to looking after grandchildren.. haha.. My parents are 70 but still pretty fit, though my mum had lung surgery last yr, she's ok now.. I feel bad to ask for their help cos it's like they should be enjoying their life and couple time now, going for their high teas and concerts.. Don't wanna disrupt their usual lifestyle.. So ifc is the only way.. But my job will be sales based and i don't have to be out everyday.. So on days where i work from home, thinking of keeping bb home with me instead of sendingto ifc.. hehe.. Think i'll be very happy on those days!

Xuan,

I agree.. Unless that 1 person is bringing home a very high income, if not will not be easy financially to have only 1 person wking.. I quit my job since last july cos of m/c and preparation for ivf, it's been pretty ok actually since it's just the 2 of us and we don't spend a lot.. But when bb comes along, expenses will definitely rise so i'll have to start wking..
 


hehe fuzzybear, you rem that I went for gynae check yesterday. yes, finally baby was slightly more cooperative and we saw the gender. Gynae said "most likely". It's a GIRL! hooray! so the "boy part" we saw at 10 weeks was really just the nub. actually, before i conceived #2 and was still undecided whether to stop at one, i dreamt that i conceived #2 and that it's a girl and i was so relieved cos I felt at least there will be less comparison between #1 and #2 since they are not the same gender. so my dream came true. hahaha.

i took 4.5months of npl during #1's time. I think i may not do it this round cos financially, with two kids, i think it will be tough to be on just one salary. also, the inertia is very high when it's time to return to work if you rest for too long. however, i think 2 months npl is still ok, at least can moo-moo full time for 6 months. im considering too.
 
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