(2013/04) April 2013

morning all!

ggchua, I've been having terrible vomiting episodes; couldn't drink anything and puke after eating - even eating sweets make me puke. Visited my gynae yesterday and he gave me omperazole and domperidone, it helps a fair bit. Now I'm able to survive on Coke (ONLY) and eat small meals. Perhaps you might wanna try to ask your gynae for medicine?

Like you, my MIL is also v @#&*@&#! Had maid issues where hb's relatives wanted to borrow our maid every now n then to run errands for them. MIL will also pass remarks like, so small thing u can't endure, I puked all the way till 7 mths blah blah blah. Also had a huge quarrel with HB till I was so depressed and had spotting. After that, I explained to my hb that I'm feeling so miserable cause of carrying his baby, the least he could do is provide some comfort blah blah... had a good talk. I get v worked up too when he tries to defend them and he knows my character (will pack bag and go back parents' home if they push me too hard)... Now, if his mom or anyone says anything remotely idiotic to me, he'll defend me.
 


Feel so sad reading the posts.. Almost cry when read about the mil n vomiting parts. I m so lucky my hubby n me now living with my parents while waiting for our BTO. My mum treat me like a queen.. But mil don seem happy when we tell her I m pregnant.. Anyway who care right. I m only seeing her once a week
To those mommies hving serious MS , try to stay positive. Tell yrself is for the bb n endure for few weeks till our 1st trim over. Jia you!
 
divein: aiyo........ but u r good. you can still managed to control your whines and be understanding. mayb because i grew up in a single parent family and somemore under my dad's custody, thats why i cant stand naggings and also mommy's boy and ladies with princess attitude. when i'm not feeling good, i just wish to be alone and hope that noone will come and 'disturb' me. that's why somethings i can never understand. like when my MIL asked me whether my husband wanna eat this or that, have he taken his dinner or etc. to me, he's already an adult and he should know how to take care of himself. i understand to all mothers, their children will always be children in their eyes. but it doesnt mean that you should really treat them like a kid.

my husband usually will leave his bowl on the dining table after his meal. throw his dirty socks on the floor and at any part of the house.

next time i will definitely teach my kids to do housechores even for boys.
 
angela, i about same timing as u. tml is my 6th weeks but no MS at all so far.
my sis in law say she dreamt i carry bb boy to nex 2days before i announce preggie. but i dun wan pint any hope, boy girl healthy more impt. i dun care tt he the oni son, if girl too bad..

rach, i oso getting uglier. i even tot of put makeup but scare bad for bb...

ya, ggchua, ask ur hubby drink la! ur mil wont knoe also. i always take her things back n throw one LOL
 
Mocca mama I think you are right. With that kinda money you can hired a "pro" confinement lady. Is really better with someone who is experienced. Mum or Mil if they complaint they backache, here & there pain. Is adding more stress to yourself.
 
Just to share...to curb MS, can try drinking camomile tea. I drank quite a bit yesterday to help me sleep coz I have been having insomnia and was feeling really lousy at night. It helps alleviate the nauseous feeling.
 
honestly, we should not expect our mum or mil that they must help us take care of our babies. if they offer, it is good. if no, you can't blame them too. imagine they have slogged so many decades for their kids and finally can enjoy. not everyone is willing to go thru taking care of infant at their age coz it can be very tiring.

when i was preggie with #1, my mil was super gan cheong coz i mc before. now i;m preggie with #2, the treatment is much less as compared to previous. at the same time, my 3rd sil (hb bro's wife) is preggie with #1 and she is more focused on her. i'm fine and dun feel jealous coz to me, mil will always be my hb's mum, not my own mum. you should never expect her to treat you well like her own kids coz we are not. just don't have any expectations of your PILs and I think you will feel better.

when we first told pils i'm having #2, they have no reaction at all, not even any sign of happiness. mil immediately declare she can't help me take care of #2. my #1 is currently taken care by her but will go cc next year. i think she will be helping my sil taking care of her bb which is due in feb 13. when i told hb, he was like, oh, no choice. he said his bro dun like his mil and definitely will want his mum take care esp is #1. plus they stay nearer to her. so we just have to find alternatives. to us, no point dwelling on mil being bias or dun wnat to help us. we focus more on finding solutions that we can accept.
 
Angela: ive tried communicating to him! by all ways! the soft way and the hard way.. but he just refuse to listen. LIKE A SMALL KID. when i asked him to throw his dirty socks into the laundry bag, i need to tell him 3 times over a few hours. and his socks stinK! i'm already very sensitive to smell and that idiot happily throw his smelly dirty socks on the floor in the middle of our room!

Rach: cannot bluff her.. cause the chicken essence box is unopen. and she will check! she ask me so many times till i feel like throwing away the chicken essence lo.

Shirelle: can drink coke?

maxlene: YOU ARE ONE LUCKY MAMA!
 
zenn, ya n my mum didnt even take care of us, her own 4 children last time . so i oso scare to let her take care. but i offered cos i wana let her earn that $$..

but seeing her dun wan attitude, forget it la. the $$ i better hire outsider. i be happier also. i dun wana own them a favour like u say, backahe etc...
 
I dun dare to go facial at this time ... I pantang cos previous after facial next ay I bleed
sad.gif
so I Hv strawberry nose now really uncomfortable
sad.gif
can't imagine 1 more month without facial .. I will grow mushrooms
 
can throw , u just take the bottle when u go work. pour it out or offer it to ur colleague. she see inside box getting lesser will take it as u eat liao lor... dont throw or pour inside the house, can smell..
 
mareikebb: i totally agreed! i dont expect her to help me or anything just dont come and disturb pls. i told my husband i would rather put our baby under a nanny's care than to under his mum's. cause i dont wanna hear any unnecessary complaints from her. some MIL are just so funny. wanna help but also complain. if give a nanny look after, at least we can say the nanny if anything goes wrong. i'm giving my MIL the market rate of a nanny anyway. and my MIL is those likes to go out with friends kind. she can hang out with her friends until next day morning. basically, those cannot stay at home kind. thats y i dont wanna let her look after. she has been working hard for the family why wanna tie her down? she should go out and enjoy what. n oh, her very pampered son dont understand this point and insist of letting his mum see. when i asked him the reason he just cant give me any
 
Btw mummies
If u all want to leave ur kids in infant care must start sourcing already cos waiting lst is very very long ESP in new estate like Sengkang punggol ...
 
MIL is scary. I have seen my mum & aunts who complained about her DIL with the slightest fault they can find. Like being too quiet, also kena complained. Daughters and daughter in law is really different de. They have double standard. I told my mum if I am your DIL, u probably vomit blood le. Coz I talked back to her every time. Hahahaha.
 
huh so fast need to book? how about Childcare next time. i dun even know my due date yet -__-

infant care too exp so im looking for nanny in punggol area.
 
Ya zenn

That's why I wondering will I become like hip that if I Hv son kekeke if not they dun Hv bad mil successors next ime XD
 
ggchua, ya, i'm surviving on sips of Coke/100 plus. Really hate sweet and gassy drinks but no choice, these are the only 2 drinks I can stomach now. Gynae advised that it's better to drink something than nothing at all it will lead to dehydration. Asked me to endure with the medication till week 12, hopefully MS will go away.
 
Devein: I think I'll talk to my therapist tonight and ask her to do anything funny to my face. =(

On MILs/mothers taking care of our kids, I also faced the same problem. My MIL is 70+ and she doesn't want to take care. Can understand lah, so old already where got stamina. My mum is much younger but she also has to take care of my 90 year old grandpa. Thank god she agreed to help me take care of my gal. Now with No. 2, she says she also dunno how to take care. I told her I'll put No. 1 in childcare but she don't want. Sigh, dilemma. Now that you all have mentioned infant care. Maybe I should put No. 2 in infant care.
 
Hahaha thou my mum & aunt complained about their DIL, they took great care of them and her kids. Nv said all those in front of them, just behind their back. So my sis told me they just wanna to distress, just let them vent out which mean no harm. Coz Their own kid & grandchildren cannot say, so DIL is being targeted. lol
 
Angela
U shd let #1 go childcare and let Bb stay home if u hv a choice. Big wan need to start learning small one will get less virus at home. Also infant care is more ex .. My first Skool abt $800+ after working mum subsidy .. Childcare ard $300+
 
Trinity, good to hear from you. Are having a good rest?

I am just as emo. I seldom cry de previously, but when preggy, I cried while watching olmypics, cried when reading post from your ladies. Haha this something beyond me. I felt pai sai to cry and will quickly hide when hubby coming. Lol

I guessed Men dont understand we need more TLC right now. My hb still goes for his drinking session twice a week. Leaving me home alone and don't even bothered how am I going to settle my dinner. Came back drunk and get crazy as usual. I will video record his behaviour and show it to him the next day when he is sober. he will apologise and repeat the same thing again.
 
I agree with you TrinityMummie! I used to be so obliging to my MIL, whatever nasty things she says I'll just keep it to myself, at the most complain to my mum. Then my hubby also don't bother. I used to hide somewhere and cry whenever she embarrasses me in front of her relatives when we are outside. Nowadays, maybe because of the homone changes, I snap at her whenever she says something nasty. Last weekend, my gal was misbehaving and climbing all over the place at MIL's house. I got angry and scolded my gal. MIL said to my gal, "Ohhh...mummy don't want you already." I scolded her and told her how could she say this kind of thing to a 2 yr old? She said, it's ok one lah, my gal won't understand. I snapped at her and said, who says she cannot understand? How could she say this kind of thing to hurt people's feeling. My FIL, hubby, BIL all diam diam after that.
 
Ocean
If u r working and time is impt, an infant care near ur home is best. If u dun hv this prob, u can go for those with gd records of teaching cos eventually ur Bb will go to their child care.
My first Skool is basic childcare, enrichment prog also so so only ... But too bad it's the only one near me. But happen that their teachers are not bad my girl loves them so I think safety and location is my priority.
 
Devein, that was what I was thinking. But my mum has been taking care of my gal since she was a baby and has feelings for her. Moreover my gal is in 2 hours play group at her place now and she has made friends already so it'll be difficult to pull her out of her existing arrangements now. I also hate the thought of putting No. 2 in infant care, but I guess no choice. =(
 
Oh why all mil like to tease children with that sentence!
My mil more funny she know I am strict with my kid so sometime she will pretend to be innocent. Always put the blame on my child. For example I ask my mil how come my girl get hold of the kinder joy where I kept in the fridge? Then she say oh she open the fridge herself. Omg I hv nvr seen my girl open fridge herself As its too hard even for me need strength. It's not likely she a 3 yr old can do that all by herself. Then I lecture my poor girl infront of her telling her cannot do that blah blah blah ...
 
I also hate my hubby go out for drink!
Next time after we give birth we ladies go out for drink let our hubby stay home with the babies! Lol
 
TrinityMummie: Yeah, hubby will always side their own mum. They will always say why are we so difficult, why we talk back etc. When we are bullied, did they stand up for us? Anyway nowadays I don't care, whenever I'm not happy with her comments, I'll snap at her immediately. Or else I'll completely ignore her.
 
i realised depression is v common during and after preg..me also had post natal depression
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i cried every nite, during pumping..cuz last time i lead those princess life..my hb v v gd to me..then suddenly i need to look after bb, breast feed bb (serious engorgement plus tired)..bt during those mths before i moved to usa, my mil stayed my hse to help me with my bb..she look after from morning till evening..me is nite shift..if nt me more depressed..
i gt quite a gd mil..she helped me clean my hse everytime once she comes out from msia..bt no matter hw gd a pil is, sure gt conflicts de..last time before planning for marriage, i told hb, no flat = no talk abt marriage..then he faster secretly applied for a flat..once gotten liao then tell me to surprise me..cuz i cannot stay with inlaws de..im a v v lazy ger..haha

but me super dislike my hb aunt (aunt brought hb up, cuz parents divorced. father remarried, mum go overseas to work) i still rem i cried v badly after i delivered cuz v touching plus scary moments..i dun noe natural birth is so scary..then whenever ppl asked me hw is my delivery, i will cry badly cuz maybe too scare aldy..then the stupid aunt tell me off in front of so mani visitors..tell me dun talk so much..ltr wind go inside..siao..me so damn angry..everytime ppl preg, she will prepare tonic for them bt she nv prepare for me..then i told hb this bb belongs to me and his onli..nt others..cuz none of his family members cooked anything for me..bt once bb out, everyone wants to see tis bb..

we planned to go back spore nexxt yr june bt our hse was rented out till feb 2014..so just nw hb discussed with me..i told him i rather rent a smaller unit in spore than to stay with his father, step mum and family..the step mum most irritating..she likes a bb boy..before noe gender she still cooked bird nest for me..bt after detail scanning (5th mth), i gt nutting to eat aldy cuz its a bb ger..bt i dun gif face..i shoot her directly everytime..during confinement, she and mil fight over who to help me with confinement..of cuz i preferred my mil..bt she v unhappy lo..so my mil went back msia few days and told her to talk over..wah lau she fly aeroplane lo..then my hb anyhow cook for me lo..i aldy told hb, i wont let my ger called her ah ma..anyway hb ok with my decision
 
My hb only hobby is drinking. And Omg he can really drink. So if this is taken away from him, his life is "meaningless". Lol. His work is stressful too so that is his way to destress. I m ok for him to drink, as long as he don't fool around, get into fight, no violence & come home safe & sound. I really kena his non-sense behaviour when he is drunk. But now think is superb funny. Btw I m allergic to alcohol. One beer can leave me scratching like hell.
 
Yes agreed with divein. I realized mummies v wei da after I become one. No matter hw gd a husband is, still lose to us. Normally husband always play with bb onli. Bt we cooked, feed them etc. changed them, bath them. Bt I reali enjoyed my life with bb. Bt sometimes I cannot tahan if she whined. We can organized playdates with our babies. Like wad my June mummies 2011 club did
 
wa i go one lunch so many posts, cannot catch up.

feeling backache and very xinku from the outside sun. feel like taking mc but i already on MC tue. I haven break news to boss, how do u all break?

my boss already hint to me TWICE not to have kids, use prevention..
 
Mocca
How can ur boss say that lol its against gov policy lol
My office is full of singles and the boss although I think she felt same way as ur boss bt dun dare to hint
 
Mocca, yeah agreed with Divein and ocean_blue. They are just boss, no rights to interfere with your family planning.
 
cos she told me children r lability. hold her back in career. she married but refuse have kid.

one of my colleague got preggie, went back Philippines give birth. cause alot inconvenience to team. She used that colleague to empathises strongly to me hers was ACCIDENT, n hope I have family planning to prevent such things... 2nd time my admin side was sharing abt pain during labour. After that, when only me & her alone, she asked me. "so after hearing all these, u still dare have bb? your breast will become out of shape, like pencil, n sagging "...

then lastly, she told me if i preggie, I am only entitled to 3 mths ML. I went to check LOA, really stated 3 mths only. we both r sg, bb of cos sporean. am i entitled to 4 mths despite my LOA states 3mth?

I was stupid enuff not to read up when i join. din think so far back then... i was on the verge of resign back then but if resign, i need to wait 6mth probation before i can ttc again. now cant even resign....

can anyone advice me on the ML?
 
and trinity, my boss same as ur colleague.

tt phillip colleague gave birth on 7th mth. baby in ICU. boss still insist she join us in BKK meeting. ask her come one day, next day go back.

she refuse but boss insists. in the end, she came but can tell her heart not in meeting. she stumble during presentation. i really scare my boss do this to me too.

imagine bb still in ICU, she oso insist u turn up for meeting... while u r still in ML
 
Wahahaha become pencil and sagging lol
How she become ppl superior lol then u tell her good lor then u no need requisite pencil save money for office XD
Go and tell all ur colleagues let them Hv a gd laff
 
back from lunch too, hope the other half of the day passes soon!

Mocca, your boss is terrible! Need to record his epic dialogue and stomp him if the need calls for it!
 
Wah so many negative comments on MIL..I'm lucky (or unlucky?) that my PILs are in Australia and they only come back Spore once/ twice a year...Then of cos la, since we seldom meet its always easier to get along than having to see each other every single day...My own mom? She is those hiao ka chng type cannot sit still and help the daughter take care of the kids one...so sigh I suppose i gotta rely on the maid when #2 is out...My maid's contract is due for renewal so I've been acting nice to get her to renew for another 2 years..Apart from being dirty and messy, she sayang my son alot...now that I'm preggie, she like happier and more kancheong than me macam she herself is preggie..told my son she dreamt of me being preggie few mths back...i was like wah u so zun, give me toto numbers also not bad ma.....

Anyone knows when we could start travelling? Would 6 months be a good time to travel to some countries like Aus?
 
tayfamily: I'm travelling in 2 week's time, in which I would be in my 2nd month. I think should be ok bah so long as we take more rests and don't carry heavy stuff.
 


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