(2013/01) Jan 2013

I lost a baby at 6 months because foetus lack of a nerve fibre in the brain. I was so upset nearly lapse into depression but I hang on tight for my #1. Then I casually mentioned that I heard that if unhealthy sperms can lead to this only.

She then buay song i say this about her son, then she use newspaper cuttings cut chinese words, paste on white paper, say my children die is I no good, don't blame on people, you children die is your curse...

kaoz, imagine I was already in depression trying to overcome, she write these to me and on 1st day of 7th lunar month somemore! trying to threaten me and scare me but sorry I won't. I went to the police straight and reported the case. Police asked if I want to pursue the matter but I say I have no idea who the person is. Until few weeks later, I found a book containing similar chinese words and newspaper cuttings and my address and her similar handwriting on the envelope....
 


snowger > I see..
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ya, so long didnt do things against the conscience, is good already..
 
jan, wah! "threatened" letter to threaten wat? how come so dramatic one? I rather push my hubby in front whenever got dispute with my mil. Dun like to confront directly.

Sylvia, same same.. if wanna drink soup or any bu stuff, must prepare myself. else nobody will care. haiz...
 
jan11325, she so bad. Horrible! She never lost her bb before rite. She won't understand the pain. I can fully understand cos my mum lost a few bb before having me. I'm the lucky survival. So I can feel for my mum. I'm in stress too. But I hang on for her. Cos I know she have suffered so much to hav me.
 
haiz, that's why I lun lor..no matter what still my hubby's mother.

if no her, no hubby ma. but I did told hubby, I will have this hatred, I mean who don't??? Why you say these things to me? Instead of comforting me, buying stuff for me to recuperate you say rubbish.

When I go married, I got nothing from her, when I gave birth to her grandchildren, nothing from her. I don't expect anything big or grand but at least show concern I also happy.
 
jan, ur mil really very inconsiderate. U already so sad yet still blame u. Furthermore it's not ur fault! Ur hubby din do anything? or he side his mother one? Really feel unjustice for u. If it's me, i would act ignorance and get the police to find the culprit. Teach her a lesson. And maybe act blur and say in front of her that u got this threaten letter, dunno who send one. So u made a police report. See if she got any reaction.
 
jan, I understand. I also gt nothing from my mil. No 4 golds etc. Guo da li also a very super simple one with only oranges and small ping jing. My mum return most to them.

Don knw y 90% of the MILs r like tat.
 
Jan, I have the bird nest but I always forget to drink. The stall ones like not very good. But better than nothing. Ok, I will try to take the stall's bu tang once a week from now.
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Shice - my hubby also suspected is his mother, but did not want to make the matter big or nasty.

I really wanted to do what you say, make the police find the culprit and teach her a lesson but I told myself, what you are doing, God can see, 人在做, 天在看。She ended up divorce twice. So I don't do evil, let god punish her. At least I don't have karma for doing that to her.

I did purposely mention, someone send threaten letter to me, but she no reaction. like acting very happy that I got worried or watsoever.
 
Coconut - I have been feeling so hot that I started drinking this last week. So far, ok. So yummy!
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I think the nesting instincts have kicked in for many of us, and I am especially anxious since I have prepared nothing. Been too busy with work and my 2 boys!
 
Jan: wow.. Cant believe it!! Like tat she cursing her own grandchildren?!! Bt if u can lun than lun lor.. If nt gt conflict oso no gd, esp if staying together. Thou my MIL bochup us, bt at times she oso gt some comments esp regarding my ger.. I juz orh orh orh.. Bt i do or no do she oso dono..
 
Hehehe...for #2 I still craving for bird nest. Dunno why #3 don't want drink, wasted lei, otherwise I get to bu my complexion too..hahah..

Is bird nest good for the baby? I drank for #2 end up hahahha my #2 like very "yang orh" lei, my sister say jokingly i drink too much "yan wor" that's why hahahahah
 
Jan11325 - I can not imagine someone being so mean to write something so nasty..I mean, for what, right?! Gosh if it is really your MIL, then she really has nothing better to do with her time! Anyway, you are right, what goes around comes around.
 
Chin: i oso have nt prepared anything!! Bt after coming back to forum after so long, realised many mummies have started.. So told hubby i tink we shd start.. He was like, tot u say no need so kan chiong? Than say relac relac is i say.. Now say prepare oso i say.. Haha!!
 
chin lee - ya i think the nesting instint is striking most of us. I began clearing my room, throwing stuff, create space for cot when I am like....hmm...25 weeks niah..hahahha, and I kan chiong wanna wash the bb clothes but think think..i too fast liao hahahah.

Julie - ya no choice, LUN is the most enduring thing I do now for her. I can't stay with her, I will kill her really...given my bad temper hahaha. She will comment about my kids when i scold them she will say children is children ma, then I will keep quiet. But in the car, I will KP my husband, my kids I teach my own cannot meh?? They naughty of cuz must scold la.
 
Jan: ya true.. Teach ur kidz ur own way.. Bt mine like other way round. Coz still waiting for our BTO. So staying at in law place, no choice muz keep mouth shut. Esp when she anyhow scold my ger. there was once in the morn i was peeing than my ger waiting for me in the kitchen than i heard MIL scolding my ger.. When i came out of toilet my ger saw me n started crying.. Maybe coz MIL took her bolster (my ger was holdin it coz juz woke up) and scolded her coz my ger took a stool.. She had intended to stand on the stool when i'm out coz i wanted to keep her milk bottles which were on the table. Bt MIL scolded her for taking the stool, say will fall down. In this case is out of goodwill, scared she fall down.. Bt early in the morn no need shout so loud at a small little innocent girl rite? No wonder my ger don like to look for her granny nowadays..
 
Julie - just have to lun a while. once you get your BTO will have less conflicts le...

Haiz..why we DIL have MIL like that? I next time will be others' MIL I won't want to be like that.
 
Dragontail: diff pple diff.. For my #1 delivery considered quite smooth. Induced coz bb heartbeat low n placenta dying. Doc say the pill worked well on me. Say nt every1 react well. After induced, went hm take bag, go eat, go bath than went back hospital 3 hrs later. Was induced at 2pm, hospitalized at 5pm, delivered 12am the next day.. I scared pain, so i opted for epidural.. I reli admire those who never use epidural.. Hero..
 
Jan- ya.. Beginning when sign the BTO so excited, go quite often to c.. Bt alwaz like so slow the progress till i oso xian. So now tell myself onli go once every 3mths. The last time i went was in sept build till 23 storey super happy. Haha!! Hopefully next yr can have our own place! If nt 4 of us in 1 rm super squeezy la.. Tink the last time i can go view will b in dec b4 delivery. Telling bb not to come out too early.. Coz like tat cannot celebrate new yr eve.. No fireworks for my ger liao.. Haha
 
Dragontail - my EDD is 4 Jan 2013. Third one, so dun know whether I will be early. My second one came out one day before EDD. Same as my first one. If you are going to opt for epidural anyway, then go for it early so that you have energy to push later (no need to use forceps). Of cos if you think you can/ want to "tong" all the way drug-free, then of cos it will be painful.

For my second one, I did try to hang in a bit longer without epidural, but since i was induced, the pain escalated very quickly suddenly - could not take it. The nurse/ midwife saw me - told me that I had better decide then.

I will be going for epidural again for this one.
 
Chin: same same!! I oso due 4jan.. Tat time i pain till cannot tom cannot open eyes.. When nurse came to ask 2nd time if i confirm wan epidural (coz i already said i wan during prenatal visits to gynae).. I could onli nod my head.. The epidural works wonders.. Tats y i admire those who can go without it.. Power..
 
Jan

ur MIL power!! like that also can do! madness.

Shice,
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hv to take care of urself more loh.


Dragontail,
u can buy readymade birdnest. birdnest is good foetus's development esp the brain n also skin will be fair n no scar/marks

but if self prep, is cheaper & more 'liao'
 
Haha, my excuse is very lame but it works.
I tell myself i have to save money, so i cannot have epidural.
6 hours of labour w/o epi, I hope I can make it for #2
 
Cheese: salute!!! I 5min cannot tahan liao.. This time hubby ask i wan epidural nt. i say yes, he say $500 leh.. Bt i don care!!! Haha!!
 
Jan, yup.. i believe in karma too. But sometimes just wanna make the other party pek chek abit. haha..

Just wanna defend that not all mils are bad la. For instance, mine is quite nice. Though never cook bu tang and stuff for me during preg, but after birth still got come and help take care of my son. She loves my son too, which i'm glad. Along the way, sure got disputes, where I would nag and complain to my hubby. But overall, still okay if we try to avoid ugly situations. I can't say for sure if i'll be a good mil in future. Coz i know if my son gets a ah lian or bimbo kind of ger, i prob can't stand her and may not treat her nice. Or if my dil ba zi and mine dun click, also difficult. haha.. so i better not "commit" myself to be a good mil for now. :p

re: epidural
one word - HEAVEN!!
 
hahahah...power salute those without epi. My "terminated" pregnancy, I pushed until face green green, pain until siao also cannot take painkillers. but lucky is small la, 6 mths only.

My live pregnancy, C-sect settle once and for all..hehehhehehh
 
Julie - leg cramps, wear socks. it helps.

Shice - hahah I cant promise I be so heavenly good mil but at least i know i mustn't ill treat someone's else daughter hehehehheh
 
Jan: u mean b4 goin to slp? Its coz the rm cold? Coz so far 3x liao.. Happened when i stretch my leg.. N alwaz happens to the right small thigh area.. Will try tonight.. Thou dont happen every night. Thanks!!
 
ya. im having cramps this two days.
i will raise my voice and my hubby will massage for me...

LOLL
JuLiE - me money minded ma. loll save $!
 
Julie- yes before you go sleep wear the socks to keep warm. even fan blowing will cause the cramps. avoid cooling stuff like kang kong...
 
Jan: Reli? Cover blanket enuff? Coz i scared hot.. Norm
No cover blanket even wif aircon n fan on.. Opps!!

Cheese: i oso wanna save $.. Bt i scared i faint fm the pain.. Never b4 pain till cannot open eyes, cannot tok leh.. Haha!!
 
Jan: as in cover feet la.. Coz hubby scared cold 1.. He alwaz pull the blanket till i nothing to cover.. Haha!! Than i used to it till no need blanket oso can slp.. Somemore dono y my ger love to play socks.. Later c me wear socks she oso wanna wear.. Haha!!
 
<font color="119911">shice, you are funny! lol...

Suddenly tot of Allyfan - the only one with twins in this thread.
Wonder how's she...</font>
 
Canopyhaze, i like my bedsheets &amp; quilt cover hot &amp; freshly out from dryer too. But half of my family's clothes can't put in dryer because clothes label stated no tumble drying. So I seldom use except during rainy days. Thanks or the tips.
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Re: coconut water
I was told to drink green (young) coconut. Not those yellow (old) cononut, and not those small (Thai) coconut. And I drank about 3-4 times before EDD, once a wk.

Jan, that was very extreme personality of your MIL...
 
Jan, thats very bad of ur mil..

Julie, leg cramps until cannot talk? kick hubby to massage for u!! lol!! i did that! haha.. my hb will pull the blanket until i got nothing to cover too. haha..
 
Nickole: no la.. Is during delivery, pain till cannot tok.. Haha!! If cramp kick hubby oso no use leh.. He slp like a pig.. Haha!!!
 
Waves mummies!~...

Yes, i kena leg cramps recently too, just last night I experienced it again. Wanted to ask my hubby to massage for me, but realised he was sleeping on the floor!.. Guessed i'm taking up too much space tossing around.

Are your tossing frequently as well during the night?

My dr did suggest that leg cramps could be due to lack of calcium, I have since took calcium pills and load up on calcium rich food, bt seems unavoidable.

My fan blows towards my leg direction, hence I think too much wind is not good.

Do hope our cramps will go away mummies!!

Cheerss!~
 
Leg cramps - avoid stretching ur legs in the middle of the night. I realise everytime I try to stretch, end up will result in leg cramp. So trying to curb the stretching part. It's gao wei not to stretch, no choice. Rather feel gao wei than to have cramps. It works for me.
 
Jan, sayang I understand how it feels.. Nearly ended in depression after my first one, nearly committed suicide too cos she made me feel my presence redundant .

Walk out from it and hope this second bb I won't drop in it again. During my no1 she will say in front of bb that mama is a bad person, even if Ahmah wants to take u away, mama cannot say anything bla bla.
 
Jan, Aspille - be strong. I have lost 2 (both around 10 weeks)- understand how it feels. my mum was a pillar of strength. Insensitive remarks were also made by my ILs during that time. We just become stronger and more resolute to focus on the positive things.
 


@ piscean33, thanks gal.. Do u think 2 bottles are enough? I not too sure cos it my first time taking it thou 2nd time mummy.

@ snowger, bravo... hehhehehe.. I agree with u abt mil toward dil..

@ xinyue, ok noted and will get 3-6 months.. better to play safe = )
 

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