(2012) Ivf/icsi Mommies Support Group
- Thread starter mikela
- Start date
Hi Hazel
No problem.. Thk u.. How abt other sis? Any recommendation?
Btw hazel, is not true tt baby dun go bb spa will hv phobia with water for first 3mths.. Kids r flexible, they learn things fast.. My boy dun do any swimming for first half to three quarter year.. Then go pool just to play water.. He is good in swimming now after some lessons.. Also, baby are more fragile during just born so u wun want them to get any diseases easily and fall sick if go to places with many pp.. Dun worry, is never too late if u didnt bring them out for first sixth mth, they can still adapt and mix with pp around after tt as long as dun wait till they are 2-3 yrs then go out..
For me, i rather they dun get sick since just born than worry abt they will afraid with strangers if dun go out.. Thats how i do for my son too and no issue so far.. As i let him go for some play lessons since 2 yrs old to mix around.. Seriously, is never too late even if first few mths didnt go out.. Just to share my experience..
No problem.. Thk u.. How abt other sis? Any recommendation?
Btw hazel, is not true tt baby dun go bb spa will hv phobia with water for first 3mths.. Kids r flexible, they learn things fast.. My boy dun do any swimming for first half to three quarter year.. Then go pool just to play water.. He is good in swimming now after some lessons.. Also, baby are more fragile during just born so u wun want them to get any diseases easily and fall sick if go to places with many pp.. Dun worry, is never too late if u didnt bring them out for first sixth mth, they can still adapt and mix with pp around after tt as long as dun wait till they are 2-3 yrs then go out..
For me, i rather they dun get sick since just born than worry abt they will afraid with strangers if dun go out.. Thats how i do for my son too and no issue so far.. As i let him go for some play lessons since 2 yrs old to mix around.. Seriously, is never too late even if first few mths didnt go out.. Just to share my experience..
Joanne
Clarins Stretch Mark & Clarins Tonic Body Treatment Oil is a popular choice amongst the girls. My girlfriend (mother of 2) swears by it. Although it's a bit expensive, I might just treat myself.
Bio Oil (from any pharmacy like Guardian, Watson) is another popular choice. To be frank, as it contains Retinyl Palmitate & Benzyl Salicylate, I decided to err on the side although it is said to be save as it is for topical use. Since I still have a bottle, I will use it after giving birth. You may want to ask your doctor for his advise on this.
I am currently using almond oil which I bought from Perfect Potion. http://www.perfectpotion.com.au/Online-Shop/Products/sweet-almond-oil.aspx?restricted=true. My sister-in-law used almond oil during both her pregnancy and didn't get any stretch mark. Perhaps she's just lucky. Hope I'm the same but that might be wishful thinking
Clarins Stretch Mark & Clarins Tonic Body Treatment Oil is a popular choice amongst the girls. My girlfriend (mother of 2) swears by it. Although it's a bit expensive, I might just treat myself.
Bio Oil (from any pharmacy like Guardian, Watson) is another popular choice. To be frank, as it contains Retinyl Palmitate & Benzyl Salicylate, I decided to err on the side although it is said to be save as it is for topical use. Since I still have a bottle, I will use it after giving birth. You may want to ask your doctor for his advise on this.
I am currently using almond oil which I bought from Perfect Potion. http://www.perfectpotion.com.au/Online-Shop/Products/sweet-almond-oil.aspx?restricted=true. My sister-in-law used almond oil during both her pregnancy and didn't get any stretch mark. Perhaps she's just lucky. Hope I'm the same but that might be wishful thinking
Hi Msmiele
Thk u so much.. For stretch mark cream, i will use encycl (oops.. Forget the spelling) fr paris... As my tummy grow very fat with my son at 3.75kg last time but no stretch mark.. Think the lotion helps... But what i looking at now is body lotion as my leg skin is dry due to aircon always...;(
Thk u so much.. For stretch mark cream, i will use encycl (oops.. Forget the spelling) fr paris... As my tummy grow very fat with my son at 3.75kg last time but no stretch mark.. Think the lotion helps... But what i looking at now is body lotion as my leg skin is dry due to aircon always...;(
jklim4642
Well-Known Member
J03, Asians are too protective. Yes, bb hv lower immunity. But that does not mean expose them early they will get sick. end of the day, it depends on how parents take care. Angmohs expose their bbs at v young age. I know of a twin mummy with premature twins born at 29wks. When they were 5 mths old, their parents brought them to shanghai in autumn. The twins didn't fall sick there n when came bk. I hv a close friend who brought his daughter to Australia for 1 mth when bb was 3 mths in winter. This friend's daughter followed him in most of his biz trips usu to less developed cities in china. His daugthter can eat spicy la mien at 1+yrs. No issue at all. I hv other friends with bbs some, premature some more start bb at pool or bb spa just a few mths old.
My hubs is like made of paper when I know him. Every time go overseas confirmed fall sick. He nv has any issue after knowing me. My parents too, came bk fr holidays sick! But when they went with me, they nv fall sick. I sleep in aircon room with hubs. I pregnant now, lower immunity but I dun fall sick when he falls sick.
Anyway, we hv different sch of thoughts. I dun agree with over protective upbringing. Scared of this n that, dun even dare to try. To me, kids need to be trained n exposes from very young. I m glad my hub thinks the same way as me. He is even more adventurous than me in certain things. Eg he will say can go beach resort. I will say no, bb's skin gets burnt easily. That time we self drive in Japan, I told him gps in japanese, how? Petrol kiosks also everything in jap, etc. He will tell me dun hv to worry, we can manage! True enough! We did & didn't even get lost.
My hubs is like made of paper when I know him. Every time go overseas confirmed fall sick. He nv has any issue after knowing me. My parents too, came bk fr holidays sick! But when they went with me, they nv fall sick. I sleep in aircon room with hubs. I pregnant now, lower immunity but I dun fall sick when he falls sick.
Anyway, we hv different sch of thoughts. I dun agree with over protective upbringing. Scared of this n that, dun even dare to try. To me, kids need to be trained n exposes from very young. I m glad my hub thinks the same way as me. He is even more adventurous than me in certain things. Eg he will say can go beach resort. I will say no, bb's skin gets burnt easily. That time we self drive in Japan, I told him gps in japanese, how? Petrol kiosks also everything in jap, etc. He will tell me dun hv to worry, we can manage! True enough! We did & didn't even get lost.
jklim4642
Well-Known Member
I m a v careful person, so I will always make & take a lot of prevention & plan well ahead. I dun wan anyone to fall sick. My mum can tell me change in temp, she gets frost bite n fall sick. To be is rubbish. Pp who live in 4 seasons countries how? We love winter. Usu this time of the yr, we will be in some cold Countries. I made my parents apply lots of Rich moisturing cream, Use super gentle gel wash (no soap), etc when they travel with me n vitamins everyday when overseas. I make sure they are properly attired n I bring heat pads for body, legs, etc. If nv use, I will throw after expiry. I will watch the food they eat. ESP hubs, super sensitive stomach. By now, I know every one's pattern. So, is easy.
jklim4642
Well-Known Member
Like a no of pregnant sisters here, still chiong Xmas sales at packed shopping centers. Lots of pp leh, pregnant still go squeeze with pp n exposed to germs, sure will get sick coz our immunity is low?
Kimmy, stay at home! No more shopping for you! Still spend 4.5 hrs at isetan yesterday. Even more daring than me! Just joking! Super sianz standing in a q now for gift wrap..
Kimmy, stay at home! No more shopping for you! Still spend 4.5 hrs at isetan yesterday. Even more daring than me! Just joking! Super sianz standing in a q now for gift wrap..
Very emo now. My hubby just walk out after a quarrel with me and all because of a piece of tau kwa. I was sayingthe ntuc fairprice tau kwa is not as nice as the market. He says why am i so fussy. I did not say cannot eat. I just say its not as nice and we should buy from makret next time if got chance. He says i troublesome, why must hv such high standard, normal can eat can already. I tell him he only say this to me. Why if his friends say this or even his patrnts say, he will just say ok go other place to buy and see how. Sure he will say that. Why is he picking on me?? He say if he also standard high then my mom good also no up to standard. Show me his pattern and stormed out. I will also walk out. Who dare who! I'm supposed to stay cheerful and happy but now I'm stranded alone as a depressed mum. Why he canny just say let's buy from market and see how it taste. He replied and say why must say, the tau kwa taste ok what.
jklim4642
Well-Known Member
Tanny, dun cry. Go watch some comedy. Next time try using a different approach. Say something like bb dun like the food coz stomach queasy after taking... Or crave for this n that.. Must be bb WANs to eat... When tummy bigger, tell him what bb wan to eat n ask him to buy.. Some thing like bb enjoys the food coz happy n moves!
Hi Hazel
I agree with u that different pp got different view.. I hv no issue even if u want bring ur bb out during first mth. I just try to clarify what u say is not so true abt swimming and cannot mix with pp if didnt go out first few mths thru my experience so tt other ladies dun get confuse too...
I agree with u that different pp got different view.. I hv no issue even if u want bring ur bb out during first mth. I just try to clarify what u say is not so true abt swimming and cannot mix with pp if didnt go out first few mths thru my experience so tt other ladies dun get confuse too...
jklim4642
Well-Known Member
J03, defintely must bring bb out first mth leh. Unless ur bb dun hv to go for check up such as jaundice?! Hospitals/clinics got so much germs (compared to plcs such as shopping areas)... maybe ur case special, can ask PD/doc to give personalized service n visit ur bb at home, first 6 mths injections also can do at home. Wow!! Hehehe!!!
jklim4642
Well-Known Member
Of course when toddlers attend lessons, confirm will know how to swim! If not pay money for wat? I think u miataken what i mean... I am not talking abt fear playing with water. Which kid Dun like that? What I meant was bb knows how to swim when they r born. They hv been swimming in mummy's womb n wun cry when water splash on their face. Ie, throw bb into pool, they will float n not sink. Of course, we wun do that, but the Angmoh will. After that initial months, they lose their swimming capabilities, ie forget already. I think u need to read more, not even to mention confusing other sisters here. No time to read is an excuse. Where this ia heart to do something, there is a will. Hehehe
Swimming is the best way to build up their immunity, my gf even said public pool better bb spa coz hc chlorine in water.
Swimming is the best way to build up their immunity, my gf even said public pool better bb spa coz hc chlorine in water.
chris_baby
New Member
Hi Tanny,
dun angry..cheer up... i always use bb as excuse when i wanna eat something.. i'll say oooh bb wants to eat this or tat etc..and it works lor...cos my hb can be also impatient and quick temper at times. When we are preggy, our hormones and emotions then to be high and slightest things can just make us crampy...go watch some comedies etc ...
dun angry..cheer up... i always use bb as excuse when i wanna eat something.. i'll say oooh bb wants to eat this or tat etc..and it works lor...cos my hb can be also impatient and quick temper at times. When we are preggy, our hormones and emotions then to be high and slightest things can just make us crampy...go watch some comedies etc ...
chris_baby
New Member
Tanny,
Like this morning, while we were driving to bfast i talked to bb in the car and ask bb wanna eat durian and she kicked me..hahaha then hb started at me and say no durian..then i say oh its bb wanna eat not me ah....
Like this morning, while we were driving to bfast i talked to bb in the car and ask bb wanna eat durian and she kicked me..hahaha then hb started at me and say no durian..then i say oh its bb wanna eat not me ah....
Thanks Chris b and hazel. Much better. I just slept after he left cos it was raining heavily. Then I heard him come back.. I have become better, as in my runny nose for the past 3 days has stopped overnight! Now become a bit blocked only. Want to go and return thanks to temple but still raining...
I thInk u dun know wht u write tts why i am trying to clarify ur words. U mention earlier "swimming classes at bb spa. If pass that initial period bb will get phobia from swimming".. wht u say in this sentence is not true.. Kids will never get phobia even didnt go what baby spa.. This is something trying to earn parent $$.. Tts why i mention, no need go wht spa oso can swim as long as they go thru lessons at a later age..
it has nothing to do with reading on what.. What i mention here is all base on my experience as a mother since i been thru it with my son..
As Regarding abt shopping, u mention also "for our case, after 1st mth, we will bring bb out. During wk days, can't expect me to pay bb whole day alone. If so, bb will be v unfriendly to strangers. Hv u wonder why some bbs are so friendly n smiles to everyone while some stick to mommy like glue, All these start from young. I will bring bb to parks or nearly shopping areas too".. This is the sentence i am trying to clarify that not tt u dun bring kids out during the first few mths means they will stick to mummy like glue.. Is not true too... As long as he join some play groups even in 2yrs old and didnt go out frequently before 2yrs old will oso never too late to be friendly and smiles to everyone.. My boy is a live example so i worry u will confuse first time mum so i share my experience... Is not tt what u oways say is oways right.. If u can advise others when somebody say something wrong, why cant others share their experience with u? Does tt mean tt only wht u say is oways right? U still hv no experience being a mummy so sometime hv to listen to others too.. If u hv ur own stand point then just be it.. Need not others must share same thinking as u right?
Anyway, like i say, u hv ur own standpoint on how u want ur baby to be.. I just want to share with all my experience.. I read alot of books/magazine on how to be gd mummy in the past too.. Especially after i give birth to my son and there is no such thing as forum.. Pregnancy is something happen 8yrs ago so may forget something and need learn fr all here but i am a mummy everyday so will never forget what i read and use it on my son.. U hv a gd weekend too.. No hard feeling..
it has nothing to do with reading on what.. What i mention here is all base on my experience as a mother since i been thru it with my son..
As Regarding abt shopping, u mention also "for our case, after 1st mth, we will bring bb out. During wk days, can't expect me to pay bb whole day alone. If so, bb will be v unfriendly to strangers. Hv u wonder why some bbs are so friendly n smiles to everyone while some stick to mommy like glue, All these start from young. I will bring bb to parks or nearly shopping areas too".. This is the sentence i am trying to clarify that not tt u dun bring kids out during the first few mths means they will stick to mummy like glue.. Is not true too... As long as he join some play groups even in 2yrs old and didnt go out frequently before 2yrs old will oso never too late to be friendly and smiles to everyone.. My boy is a live example so i worry u will confuse first time mum so i share my experience... Is not tt what u oways say is oways right.. If u can advise others when somebody say something wrong, why cant others share their experience with u? Does tt mean tt only wht u say is oways right? U still hv no experience being a mummy so sometime hv to listen to others too.. If u hv ur own stand point then just be it.. Need not others must share same thinking as u right?
Anyway, like i say, u hv ur own standpoint on how u want ur baby to be.. I just want to share with all my experience.. I read alot of books/magazine on how to be gd mummy in the past too.. Especially after i give birth to my son and there is no such thing as forum.. Pregnancy is something happen 8yrs ago so may forget something and need learn fr all here but i am a mummy everyday so will never forget what i read and use it on my son.. U hv a gd weekend too.. No hard feeling..
jklim4642
Well-Known Member
J03, well, yes, u hv a boy, went thru full term pregnancy, a mummy too,. Read books/magazines in the past.. But hor.. If u dun remind me that, I will think u first time mummy, coz All the things u ask here seem otherwise...
FYI, I hv a little sister who I m so much older than her. So, though i hv not yet be a mummy, does not mean I m any inferior to u. U say something u forget already, as 8 yrs already, did u still remember stuff like how to bathe a bb? FYI, I definitely do though it is 20 yrs ago since I did it.. My mum is in her 60s, memory definitely not as gd as us, even she does... Dun forget i hv a 7 yrs old & 5 yrs nephew & niece at home who i always bb sit last time coz my sil/bro work long hrs. I m not saying u r wrong or I m right or vice versa. I am just sharing my thoughts, not saying I m right. U can dun agree but u cannot say coz of one experience u had (ie ur boy) u r right. One eg is not representative of every kid. Furthermore, Ur boy maybe social by nature, so that makes it easier for him to mingle with others regardless of age he started.. Also, 8 yrs ago, I m sure u are not so stressed up like now, so ur boy is more easy nature too.
When I say holidays, straight Way u jump to tour.. U assume it will be crowded. The only risk is on the plane where air is not ventilated. The plc to go, how many hrs of flight, the amentites, etc, hv to be well considered for the sake of bb. Go holidays, does not mean in big grp, does not mean visit confined areas when there..
Not sure if I m right, but I think u r a simple woman which is not a bad thing, Nv been exposed to much.. Eg, go holidays alone free & easy, plan an overseas trip single handedly for an entire family trip, etc...
Of course no hard feeling.
FYI, I hv a little sister who I m so much older than her. So, though i hv not yet be a mummy, does not mean I m any inferior to u. U say something u forget already, as 8 yrs already, did u still remember stuff like how to bathe a bb? FYI, I definitely do though it is 20 yrs ago since I did it.. My mum is in her 60s, memory definitely not as gd as us, even she does... Dun forget i hv a 7 yrs old & 5 yrs nephew & niece at home who i always bb sit last time coz my sil/bro work long hrs. I m not saying u r wrong or I m right or vice versa. I am just sharing my thoughts, not saying I m right. U can dun agree but u cannot say coz of one experience u had (ie ur boy) u r right. One eg is not representative of every kid. Furthermore, Ur boy maybe social by nature, so that makes it easier for him to mingle with others regardless of age he started.. Also, 8 yrs ago, I m sure u are not so stressed up like now, so ur boy is more easy nature too.
When I say holidays, straight Way u jump to tour.. U assume it will be crowded. The only risk is on the plane where air is not ventilated. The plc to go, how many hrs of flight, the amentites, etc, hv to be well considered for the sake of bb. Go holidays, does not mean in big grp, does not mean visit confined areas when there..
Not sure if I m right, but I think u r a simple woman which is not a bad thing, Nv been exposed to much.. Eg, go holidays alone free & easy, plan an overseas trip single handedly for an entire family trip, etc...
Of course no hard feeling.
ron8129
Well-Known Member
Tanny, glad to hear the flu is subsiding, rest more ok? Benefits of pregnant woman
Also the hormones in our bodies make us very emotional, maybe u want to explain to your husband so he can understand what you r experiencing & that the emotional roller-coaster is largely beyond your control.
Hazel, if u notice, the question i asks here are mostly abt pregnancy which i mention that is something happen 8yrs ago and i just try to be very careful for this pregnancy since is not easy.. Sometime others gals hv many questions too and the feedback i got fr them are they dun dare to asks freely as worry ur negative comment sometime.. Since all are still learning, why not you just let them asks around w/o saying too much negative thing? Yes, u maybe experience taking care ur niece, sister or whoever.. I can say i take care my brother last time too since we hv been having very big age gap and not only take care my son.. All of us hv experience but the words u use like phobia lah, sticky like glue lah may not be right so i am here to share my real life experience.. But u oways must say something to outright me sound like my experience is not true.. Wht abt plan holiday for big grp lah, free n easy etc is something i did always too so nothing diffcult and u r wrong fr ur assumption of who i am.. I hv been thru not as less as u too so i respect u at times but not the words u use sometime..
U can be a gd advisor but sometime can be someone who like to splash cold water too... Not sure if i am right but i feel that u are a very self centre (自我）person.. No hard feeling too...
U can be a gd advisor but sometime can be someone who like to splash cold water too... Not sure if i am right but i feel that u are a very self centre (自我）person.. No hard feeling too...
Hi tanny, I have the same problem as u. My hb knows I like home cooked food and he knows he should buy from market. But he has a habit of sleeping late and waking up late on weekends. So I end up with nothing. He would promise and promise but nothing materialize.Like this morning I woke up with gastric and I woke him up. Guess what he say, "u bought a lot of things yesterday go eat yourself".... I had a chat juz now he apologize. He said he was v v v v tired. I juz give and take. I was not like that when I first got married I want my way. Over the yrs I soften a lot. I accept who he is and his habits. So dun b too upset ok. What u want is a happy bb and bring bb up in a happy family. That's what I want for my family now.
Hazel and Joanne, i feel that all sisters are here to learn. We really appreciate what both of u have shared coz some of us are first time mummies and need to learn from experienced people like both of u. There is no right and wrong in anything shared here, we have to adapt according to our babies. Every baby is different, isn't it? I believe no matter how experienced one is, she also has new things to learn along the way. We should be open to suggestions and take everything with a pinch of salt coz ultimately it's our own baby and we will do what is best for the baby. No hard feelings, just hope all of us can learn from one another. Don't stop all the sharing
Ladies, just cool down. The forum is for freedom of speech, if you can't stand what others say, just ignore. Ivf mums already more paranoid n emotional than mummies with normal pregnancy and we come to this thread to share and support each other. Really hope less person specific conflicted remarks here.
Kimmy, I just bought a Fisher Price 2 in 1 cot mobile that comes with a light show projector, hee, think you will like such stuff too
ha, I'm more excited about it more than it's actual usefulness for bb
Kimmy, I just bought a Fisher Price 2 in 1 cot mobile that comes with a light show projector, hee, think you will like such stuff too
Thanks Ron, Joanne.
Tonight got some symptom already.. I see the fried beans I felt very full and queasy and only ate a bit and a mouthful of rice. I'm going on to week 8 by Monday.. Some uncomfy now Dunno what to do, sleep also cannot, rest also cannot, go out also cannot... Sigh.. Bb decide to show some symtpm to me.. Now munching plain bread..
U all booked confinement lady already? Someone intro a Malaysian to me. Wonder how to apply the permit for her?
Catherine : me too! I also like home cooked food and always cook myself.
Thanks for everyone concern. Yeah my nose is better now. I hope can recover fully by Monday!
Tonight got some symptom already.. I see the fried beans I felt very full and queasy and only ate a bit and a mouthful of rice. I'm going on to week 8 by Monday.. Some uncomfy now Dunno what to do, sleep also cannot, rest also cannot, go out also cannot... Sigh.. Bb decide to show some symtpm to me.. Now munching plain bread..
U all booked confinement lady already? Someone intro a Malaysian to me. Wonder how to apply the permit for her?
Catherine : me too! I also like home cooked food and always cook myself.
Thanks for everyone concern. Yeah my nose is better now. I hope can recover fully by Monday!
Hi fuyutsuki, agree with u. My fren told me I m not prepared for my gal's arrival cos a lot of things I juz follow or ask my mum to decide. I shared her comment with my hb. He say dun bother. Like what u say, every child is different. Can't b my parents or us will harm my gal right. We must nature our kid to our best capability. Like what I always say to my gal... I may not b the best mum but I will give u the best within my limits.
Over dinner juz now, I told my hb what i read in the forum here that guys may Not b sensitive to our needs or help out on chores. I reminded him that as a preggy lady our hormones have changed and we need lots of support. I was happy that my skin specialist told my hb pregnancy is not easy. My hb told me that I must talk what it's in my mind and not keep to heart. I was like sigh... He knows I like home cooked food but dun let me buy food at cold storage or order tingkat
Tanny, dun eat beans. That give u air in stomach. Hope yr bread refer to wholemeal bread.
Over dinner juz now, I told my hb what i read in the forum here that guys may Not b sensitive to our needs or help out on chores. I reminded him that as a preggy lady our hormones have changed and we need lots of support. I was happy that my skin specialist told my hb pregnancy is not easy. My hb told me that I must talk what it's in my mind and not keep to heart. I was like sigh... He knows I like home cooked food but dun let me buy food at cold storage or order tingkat
Tanny, dun eat beans. That give u air in stomach. Hope yr bread refer to wholemeal bread.
jklim4642
Well-Known Member
Tanny, here is the form: http://www.mom.gov.sg/Documents/services-forms/passes/Temp%20WP%20Application%20for%20Confinement%20Nanny.pdf
U can read more at MOM's website: http://www.mom.gov.sg/foreign-manpower/passes-visas/work-permit-nannies/before-you-apply/Pages/default.aspx#Levy
A few charges are involved, including a daily levy which starts running the moment the permit is approved till u cancel the permit on the day CL leaves. I find it too much trouble to engage a CL myself n to apply work permit for her coz unless is elective C section, if not we will nv know for sure when bb will arrive. Imagine, on the day i m warded, in labour pain, my hubs or some one else still need to apply the permit for the CL.. then inform CL to buy ticket to come to SG.. Then hubs must go & pick CL or i need to reimburse the CL the taxi fare to my plc...
My friend's CL was recommended by her colleague... She told me no gd coz everyone's expectation & requirements r different. Pte CLs, I need time to interview them. I have some CLs that my friends recommended. I called them n interviewed one by one To find out what type of persons they r n their approach to certain things. Most I reject after talking to them. Eg, I can tell one CL I want to nurse at night, she told me, I need to rest. Bb drinks FM or expressed BM. She said if I nurse, she got to wait for me to finish nursing before she can go bk to sleep... Another one, I told her, my friend said she was gd. She hinted to me that my friend gave her big fat angbow (开工红包).. Indirectly telling me, if I give her big angbows also, she will be gd.. Too money minded. If she does well, I will defintely give her a good angbow automatically before she leaves.. Not before that.. Yes, we need to guve CL 2 angbows on top of her fees. One on the day of her Arrival & another On her last day. These r just some egs of the outcome of my interviews.
I know A lot of mommies appoint CL on their own without applying work permit for them. Malaysian cannot be in SG more than 60 days (or is it 90 days, can't remember now) consecutively in 3 months or something. There need to be a gap of x number of weeks, if not, SG custom will not let her enter. That means CL needs to plan her assignments properly. There was once my gf's CL was rejected entry by custom coz she hit the limit. Luckily, my gf applied permit for her. Her hubs had to rush down to woodlands check point o bring her in. This max no of stay details u hv to go find out from Malaysians, MOM's website dun hv this info & I can't remember now..
After thinking thru, I decided to go thru a CL agency since those recommended by friends may not be good also. At least, CL no gd, I can ask agency for replacement... N I told the agent my expectations on the CL.. Oh ya, Some pte CLs even fly kite at the last minute.. Eg After delivery, we will be caught in a fit then. Chris experienced that when her CL (recommended by her friend) flew her kite when she was in 2nd tri.. luckily, she was able to find another one & she didnt pay the earlier one any deposit. If not, deposit also can't get back. Chris, am I right? ;p
Thru agency, my hubs need only to call the agent on the day I m admitted. She will see to the rest n bring CL to my pl on the day of my discharge.
U can read more at MOM's website: http://www.mom.gov.sg/foreign-manpower/passes-visas/work-permit-nannies/before-you-apply/Pages/default.aspx#Levy
A few charges are involved, including a daily levy which starts running the moment the permit is approved till u cancel the permit on the day CL leaves. I find it too much trouble to engage a CL myself n to apply work permit for her coz unless is elective C section, if not we will nv know for sure when bb will arrive. Imagine, on the day i m warded, in labour pain, my hubs or some one else still need to apply the permit for the CL.. then inform CL to buy ticket to come to SG.. Then hubs must go & pick CL or i need to reimburse the CL the taxi fare to my plc...
My friend's CL was recommended by her colleague... She told me no gd coz everyone's expectation & requirements r different. Pte CLs, I need time to interview them. I have some CLs that my friends recommended. I called them n interviewed one by one To find out what type of persons they r n their approach to certain things. Most I reject after talking to them. Eg, I can tell one CL I want to nurse at night, she told me, I need to rest. Bb drinks FM or expressed BM. She said if I nurse, she got to wait for me to finish nursing before she can go bk to sleep... Another one, I told her, my friend said she was gd. She hinted to me that my friend gave her big fat angbow (开工红包).. Indirectly telling me, if I give her big angbows also, she will be gd.. Too money minded. If she does well, I will defintely give her a good angbow automatically before she leaves.. Not before that.. Yes, we need to guve CL 2 angbows on top of her fees. One on the day of her Arrival & another On her last day. These r just some egs of the outcome of my interviews.
I know A lot of mommies appoint CL on their own without applying work permit for them. Malaysian cannot be in SG more than 60 days (or is it 90 days, can't remember now) consecutively in 3 months or something. There need to be a gap of x number of weeks, if not, SG custom will not let her enter. That means CL needs to plan her assignments properly. There was once my gf's CL was rejected entry by custom coz she hit the limit. Luckily, my gf applied permit for her. Her hubs had to rush down to woodlands check point o bring her in. This max no of stay details u hv to go find out from Malaysians, MOM's website dun hv this info & I can't remember now..
After thinking thru, I decided to go thru a CL agency since those recommended by friends may not be good also. At least, CL no gd, I can ask agency for replacement... N I told the agent my expectations on the CL.. Oh ya, Some pte CLs even fly kite at the last minute.. Eg After delivery, we will be caught in a fit then. Chris experienced that when her CL (recommended by her friend) flew her kite when she was in 2nd tri.. luckily, she was able to find another one & she didnt pay the earlier one any deposit. If not, deposit also can't get back. Chris, am I right? ;p
Thru agency, my hubs need only to call the agent on the day I m admitted. She will see to the rest n bring CL to my pl on the day of my discharge.
jklim4642
Well-Known Member
Also, during the stay in hospital, someone (since CL not in SG yet) needs to brew dates drink for u to take.. Cannot take water. if not, drink Milo. The night before discharge, the same person needs to boil water so that u can shower the moment u come home the next day. Hot water needs time to cool till room temp... Next day when u come home, just need to boil some more hot water to mix with the cooled boiled water coz cannot use tap water. For me, I need 2 big pails of boiled water for shower. So, the night before must boil enough hot water (3/4 per pail) to cool over the night. Next day, mix each pail with another 1/4 pail hot water.
I already told my mum to do for me. I dun wan to go home & no boiled warm water to shower until much later in the day.
I m sharing with u all these details which i hv thought thru coz a no of friends told me with CL, alot of things are still in a mess n they were so stressed in the first wk after returning home. I usually will think thru n plan carefully in whatever things I do coz I dun like surprises as they make me stressed. Hope u find this useful.
I already told my mum to do for me. I dun wan to go home & no boiled warm water to shower until much later in the day.
I m sharing with u all these details which i hv thought thru coz a no of friends told me with CL, alot of things are still in a mess n they were so stressed in the first wk after returning home. I usually will think thru n plan carefully in whatever things I do coz I dun like surprises as they make me stressed. Hope u find this useful.
Hazel : Wah got so much things.. Can see I'm so blur... V good that you shared so much. I din even know how to interview them as like what questions to ask cos dunno how I should or when to nurse the baby or like u said must bathe hot water... Alemark... My first time and I din ask around as no frns or colleagues know I preggy yet. My mom and mil also dunno I think cos I'm the eldest in our family..... First grandchild.... Very useful information. Thank you for sharing with me.
chris_baby
New Member
Hi Catherine,
heehehee sounds so like my hb..He likes to play internet gaming till 1am+ on weekends and wake up 9-10am++. Whereas for my case, i tend to wake up 7am+ and feel hungry. Especially hungry during 1st and 2nd trimester. In the beginning i'll try to wait for him to wake up and I'll get gastric esp during preggy time. So now i clever liao, i buy fresh milk / Annum milk / cereal etc when i wake up early i quickly go and drink 1 cup 1st cos we don't cook and I'm too lazy to cook myself a meal. He always tell me to wake him up cos he knows i get hungry very easily and can't wait long as will feel dizzy or gastric and so he told me to wake him up by saying " daddy, bb is hungry"!!! hahahaha and he will v fast jump out of bed. it works !!!
heehehee sounds so like my hb..He likes to play internet gaming till 1am+ on weekends and wake up 9-10am++. Whereas for my case, i tend to wake up 7am+ and feel hungry. Especially hungry during 1st and 2nd trimester. In the beginning i'll try to wait for him to wake up and I'll get gastric esp during preggy time. So now i clever liao, i buy fresh milk / Annum milk / cereal etc when i wake up early i quickly go and drink 1 cup 1st cos we don't cook and I'm too lazy to cook myself a meal. He always tell me to wake him up cos he knows i get hungry very easily and can't wait long as will feel dizzy or gastric and so he told me to wake him up by saying " daddy, bb is hungry"!!! hahahaha and he will v fast jump out of bed. it works !!!
chris_baby
New Member
Hi joanne,
u are very lucky no stretchmarks... i used all the "recommended" oil and cream from 2th mth - 7mth, and on my 28wk stretchmarks starts coming out all the way till now.. i gave up liao.. Cos it actually depends on your skin elasticity like my hairdresser, she got 3 sisters and all 4 of them didn't apply any cream/lotion and they have 2-3 kids each and they showed me their tummy not a single mark. But i still apply daily cos it helps to keep our skin moist, and prevent itchiness as during this period our skin is stretched all the way. fYI i used, BIO OIL, CLARINS OIL. ELANCL ETC.....Spend alot of $$$ on them still the same cos my skin is not good and scar easily since young and recovers very slowly.
My hb also oomfort me says its okie la just treat it as a keepsake of your battle won lor ie been a mum.
u are very lucky no stretchmarks... i used all the "recommended" oil and cream from 2th mth - 7mth, and on my 28wk stretchmarks starts coming out all the way till now.. i gave up liao.. Cos it actually depends on your skin elasticity like my hairdresser, she got 3 sisters and all 4 of them didn't apply any cream/lotion and they have 2-3 kids each and they showed me their tummy not a single mark. But i still apply daily cos it helps to keep our skin moist, and prevent itchiness as during this period our skin is stretched all the way. fYI i used, BIO OIL, CLARINS OIL. ELANCL ETC.....Spend alot of $$$ on them still the same cos my skin is not good and scar easily since young and recovers very slowly.
My hb also oomfort me says its okie la just treat it as a keepsake of your battle won lor ie been a mum.
chris_baby
New Member
Hi catherine,
haahahah i also love homecooked food esp the ones cooked by my mil ya....but cos we all worked late and by the time reached her place i'll be having dinner like 7pm++ nearing 8pm, so we norm eat outside lor..cos now preggy can't tahan starving. hahahaha But i still prefer homecooked food cos no msg and more nutritious. Now my mil is doing confinement at my sil's place just few blocks away, i'll suggest to hb to eat there cos my mil will cook etc and i'll tell him tat my frens said its better to eat homecooked food cos less msg and better for bb etc..then if we dun work too late he'll bring me go over 1-2x a week to eat.
haahahah i also love homecooked food esp the ones cooked by my mil ya....but cos we all worked late and by the time reached her place i'll be having dinner like 7pm++ nearing 8pm, so we norm eat outside lor..cos now preggy can't tahan starving. hahahaha But i still prefer homecooked food cos no msg and more nutritious. Now my mil is doing confinement at my sil's place just few blocks away, i'll suggest to hb to eat there cos my mil will cook etc and i'll tell him tat my frens said its better to eat homecooked food cos less msg and better for bb etc..then if we dun work too late he'll bring me go over 1-2x a week to eat.
chris_baby
New Member
hi Hazel,
For my case, cos this CL comes to S'pore very often so she told us to call us once I'm warded and 2-3 days later she'll make her way to my place cos she stayed near JB causeway. She don't need us to pick her up and most of the time alot of Msia confinement nannies don't require us to apply permit for them. I ever ask my fren and she said her CL told her tat they just say come S'pore to visit relatives will do. Funny rite?
Cos me and hb abit worried as my EDD is during cny period and we talked to her and she says not to worry.
For my case, cos this CL comes to S'pore very often so she told us to call us once I'm warded and 2-3 days later she'll make her way to my place cos she stayed near JB causeway. She don't need us to pick her up and most of the time alot of Msia confinement nannies don't require us to apply permit for them. I ever ask my fren and she said her CL told her tat they just say come S'pore to visit relatives will do. Funny rite?
Cos me and hb abit worried as my EDD is during cny period and we talked to her and she says not to worry.
chris_baby
New Member
Hi hazel,
Yes, i agree with you, kena play out last min by CL can be very stressful.. like my previous CL played out my fren's cousin on the day before her discharge says she can't come out fr msia due to her passport/permit. etc And when we thought of it later could be she ahe has accepted another assignment from another who pay her more $$.
My mil says tat if i'm not happy with my current CL then dun feel pai seh to send her away.. Then my hb told her nobody is perfect and if she does the basics in taking care of me and bb well he's fine with her. MIL says dun worry if CL really can't make it send her bk and save the $$ and she'll come and take care of me....cos she heard alot of bad things abt CL from her frens so she abit worried...But we all know her health la she can't do full-time Confinement for me... so just pray hard tat CL is good lor ....
Yes, i agree with you, kena play out last min by CL can be very stressful.. like my previous CL played out my fren's cousin on the day before her discharge says she can't come out fr msia due to her passport/permit. etc And when we thought of it later could be she ahe has accepted another assignment from another who pay her more $$.
My mil says tat if i'm not happy with my current CL then dun feel pai seh to send her away.. Then my hb told her nobody is perfect and if she does the basics in taking care of me and bb well he's fine with her. MIL says dun worry if CL really can't make it send her bk and save the $$ and she'll come and take care of me....cos she heard alot of bad things abt CL from her frens so she abit worried...But we all know her health la she can't do full-time Confinement for me... so just pray hard tat CL is good lor ....
chris_baby
New Member
Hi sis,
Need advise !! Anyone storing their bb's cord? I've heard from frens the advantages of storing and also from my sil who donate it to KK hospital. She told us tat she have asked a few gynaes and her cousin who's a midwife with SGH also advised her not to waste $$ storing with pte cord bank as if bb is done with certain medical conditions, we can't use the cord since it could be genetic or bb born with it so tat means cord carries the same genes so can't be used. She said she donated it to public hospital such as KK, and it will be all to use, and if she ever need to use for her bb then they will be given priority to choose from the thousands cord donated to find a match.
Told my hb and gynae and she said if suay suay kena blood diseases etc u might not find a match in the public cord bank... its best to use bk your bb's own. Anw my gynae says it depends on yourself and if u intend to have a 2nd child then some of her patient choose not to put in cord bank as siblings can save one another.
Headache man!!! cos heard got to decide b4 i admit.
Hb's view is tat he's worried tat if he donated to public hospital and suay suay if bb need to use it like 10yrs later or so and can't find a match he'll feel guilty all this life. Whereas my sil says that we think too negative as maybe we won't need to use it after all and got to pay $1000++ per yr to keep it for eg 20yrs, might as well donate so others can use and say alot of cord in public hospital definitely can find match.
Need advise !! Anyone storing their bb's cord? I've heard from frens the advantages of storing and also from my sil who donate it to KK hospital. She told us tat she have asked a few gynaes and her cousin who's a midwife with SGH also advised her not to waste $$ storing with pte cord bank as if bb is done with certain medical conditions, we can't use the cord since it could be genetic or bb born with it so tat means cord carries the same genes so can't be used. She said she donated it to public hospital such as KK, and it will be all to use, and if she ever need to use for her bb then they will be given priority to choose from the thousands cord donated to find a match.
Told my hb and gynae and she said if suay suay kena blood diseases etc u might not find a match in the public cord bank... its best to use bk your bb's own. Anw my gynae says it depends on yourself and if u intend to have a 2nd child then some of her patient choose not to put in cord bank as siblings can save one another.
Headache man!!! cos heard got to decide b4 i admit.
Hb's view is tat he's worried tat if he donated to public hospital and suay suay if bb need to use it like 10yrs later or so and can't find a match he'll feel guilty all this life. Whereas my sil says that we think too negative as maybe we won't need to use it after all and got to pay $1000++ per yr to keep it for eg 20yrs, might as well donate so others can use and say alot of cord in public hospital definitely can find match.
Hi all
Hv not cone for a while as was sick for past wks. Any remedy for cough as hving this persistent cough. Hope bb ok with all the medications i hv taken.
Chris, on the cord blood, i too hear 2 sch of thoughts on the storage and was still considering...sorry of not much help ...
Hv not cone for a while as was sick for past wks. Any remedy for cough as hving this persistent cough. Hope bb ok with all the medications i hv taken.
Chris, on the cord blood, i too hear 2 sch of thoughts on the storage and was still considering...sorry of not much help ...
chocolate_soh
Member
Hi Mummies-to-be, need your advice. I did a natural FET on 5 Dec (2 days past ovulation) and my menses is due today based on natural cycle. Started having brown discharge this morning and it seems like menses is on its way but my blood test is scheduled on Thur. Can anyone advise if I shd go for the blood test today? It shdn't be implantation bleeding since it's alrd 13 days past frozen embryo transfer rite? I have been tracking my bbt. It has dropped from 36.7 yesterday to 36.6 this morning.
And if I go for the blood test at KK 24-hour O & G clinic, do I have to bring the BHCG blood test form as I don't hv the form with me now? Do I hv to email Dr Loh to ask him whether I shd go for blood test? Or can I go straight to the O & G clinic? Afraid tt they will not entertain me.
Tanny, I rem u had brown discharge a few days before ur blood test rite? Can share ur experience? I am not pinning much hopes and I don't think I will be as lucky as you cos one of your embryos still managed to implant. In my first fresh cycle, menses came on the dot and my blood test showed tt none implanted.
And if I go for the blood test at KK 24-hour O & G clinic, do I have to bring the BHCG blood test form as I don't hv the form with me now? Do I hv to email Dr Loh to ask him whether I shd go for blood test? Or can I go straight to the O & G clinic? Afraid tt they will not entertain me.
Tanny, I rem u had brown discharge a few days before ur blood test rite? Can share ur experience? I am not pinning much hopes and I don't think I will be as lucky as you cos one of your embryos still managed to implant. In my first fresh cycle, menses came on the dot and my blood test showed tt none implanted.
jklim4642
Well-Known Member
Chris, malaysians can only stay consecutively for x no of days in SG in y mths. In & out also counted. Once hit the limit within tt period cant come in. I forgot the requirements already. My inteview qns will incl this. If CL does not even know, v risky.
Tanny, I m Also the eldest in the family n my bb is my mil's first grand child. Everyone has different expectations n requirements. Some CL does things their own way and will not do wat we want. Personally I prefer one more chin Chye one. Fr the interview u will know. Even boiled water, some CL can tell me "wow u dun touch tap water (生水)? That is alot of work leh" a true experienced CL will know during confinement, cannot touch tap water even It is hot water from the heater. Some mommies dun mind. But I mind coz once I touch, my finger joints start to ache badly.. So even wash hands, I need boiled cooled water. some mommies require CL to cook well. But That is not my priority. I m not fussy with food. But if really so bad, my mommy can take over. My CL does not even Need to do marketing or cook her own meals (I dun wan CL to eat what I eat). My parents will do that for me/her. I need a CL that needs to be good with bb n experienced n able to deliver what I wan for my bb. Like what catherine said, we all want the best for our bbs. Yes, she is right. That is why I m reading up on bb stuff coz If I know more, I wun be smoked by pp. My bb is my little precious beanie ESP more so after I lost my elder daughter last yr. I will give her the best from the most basic things in life... Nuture her, expose her, etc. Bringing up the kids these days is not cheap.. But She may be our one n only child as I m old Leow..
Tanny, I m Also the eldest in the family n my bb is my mil's first grand child. Everyone has different expectations n requirements. Some CL does things their own way and will not do wat we want. Personally I prefer one more chin Chye one. Fr the interview u will know. Even boiled water, some CL can tell me "wow u dun touch tap water (生水)? That is alot of work leh" a true experienced CL will know during confinement, cannot touch tap water even It is hot water from the heater. Some mommies dun mind. But I mind coz once I touch, my finger joints start to ache badly.. So even wash hands, I need boiled cooled water. some mommies require CL to cook well. But That is not my priority. I m not fussy with food. But if really so bad, my mommy can take over. My CL does not even Need to do marketing or cook her own meals (I dun wan CL to eat what I eat). My parents will do that for me/her. I need a CL that needs to be good with bb n experienced n able to deliver what I wan for my bb. Like what catherine said, we all want the best for our bbs. Yes, she is right. That is why I m reading up on bb stuff coz If I know more, I wun be smoked by pp. My bb is my little precious beanie ESP more so after I lost my elder daughter last yr. I will give her the best from the most basic things in life... Nuture her, expose her, etc. Bringing up the kids these days is not cheap.. But She may be our one n only child as I m old Leow..
jklim4642
Well-Known Member
Chris, I m not banking bb's cord blood. Previously, if u asked me, I will give u a firm answer that MUST bank coz I read alot of the so called "pros" online n in books. But after I had a discussion with dr loh in 2nd tri, I changed my mind. One thing that dr loh told me, he said can only keep until the child hit 30kg, ie abt 8 yrs old. After that, not much use already coz the amt of blood in the cord is not enough for the child anymore. The cord bank suggested 21 yrs?! Yes, serious illnesses may most likely be on the genes when bb is born.. So cord blood can't use either. Dr loh told me, if I hv spare money to burn, no harm but he personally feel that the returns r higher if we use the money to buy insurance for bb. I thought thru wat he said, did further research, asked a few more dr friends their views n concluded that dr loh is right. The cord bank folks called me n asked if I m interested. I said no n share with them the reasons. They nv rebut or defend! Ha!
Sensed some tension in earlier threads. Hazel n Joanne, many Thks for e advice n experiences which you have shared. It serves as a good 掺考 for every 1st time mummies here to see wat they intend to do.
All mummies have interest in their precious n wld always want to give best to their beanies. So both sisters here, stay cool ya n nonetheless, I believe all other sisters here still look forward for advices fr you experienced mummies
coz experiences are invaluable !
All mummies have interest in their precious n wld always want to give best to their beanies. So both sisters here, stay cool ya n nonetheless, I believe all other sisters here still look forward for advices fr you experienced mummies
jklim4642
Well-Known Member
Chris, men can be quite 贱 n 大男人. My first pregnancy I m also v emotional like some sisters here. I will always cry n my hubs treat his family better than me.. At least that was how I felt then ESP when I hv done so much n helped him so much. He has a v heavy financial burden coz mil is a long time dialysis pte patient for yrs. I m working so he does not hv to worry abt 2 household expenses. He just need to take care of one. But after losing my elder daughter, he really has changed alot.. This round, I m Not emotional at all n he wun say things to upset me. I rarely flare up or cry. So, our mood is really dependent on hoe our hubs treat us n behave at home. A happy mommy = a happy bb. A mommy who is always emotional or stressed will end up with a bb like this also. Hubs finally understood! So, though I lost my elder daughter, is also a blessing in disguise....
Dear Joanne and Hazel...Ladies pls take a chill pill...This is a forum for us to share all our opinions, insecurities, triumphs and tribulations...I think only IVF mommies can support each other as we all have gone through so much to come to this stage...
Joanne, if you do not mind mind me saying, you are alr very lucky to have a son and even luckier to have a second pregnancy...I think there is no need to use that in your rebuttals with Hazel as it seems pretty insensitive...Sharing your experience is fine...For a lot of us it's jus our first time being a mum.
Jus saying by opinion as a neutral party...
Joanne, if you do not mind mind me saying, you are alr very lucky to have a son and even luckier to have a second pregnancy...I think there is no need to use that in your rebuttals with Hazel as it seems pretty insensitive...Sharing your experience is fine...For a lot of us it's jus our first time being a mum.
Jus saying by opinion as a neutral party...
Morning sisters! Care to share when should we start to get CL? At which wk of pregnancy? Where to get good s'porean CL? When should we start to book antenatal classes n when/ which wk of pregnancy to attend this classes? Sorry for so many questions
just trying to plan my time.
Hope everyone having great weekend!
Hope everyone having great weekend!
Chris, I also have doubts about cord life ... My mum insist I buy to protect my bb and us. I have doubts bcos I m thelessemic. My bb has a 25% of getting it. I sought the advise of my gynae, she laid down the pros and cons for us.. Then it was like what the hack juz buy la anyway can come from the $ govt give my bb.
Hazel, I totally agree with yr choice to get a local cl. My brother in law is one clear eg of being asked to go back to msia cos he enter into sg too frequently.
Chris, u can use that sentence to wake yr hb up. But there will b one day he grew sick of it and ignore u. Juz like my hb now. Now I m smarter. I buy things to standby. For home cooked food, u dun believe that my mum rather cook for my sister and her family or my brother and not cook any for me. She can make extra and ask us to pick it up... I dun stay far from her. Initially I cried a lot and told my hb and aunty. My aunty side me and told my mum off. Then my mum give us some chicken and fish for a period now back to square one. Bcos of work I alwaysvgo home after 7, my hb say eat out if not both of us v tired. Now I tell him my colleagues and laundry lady say my tummy is too small at week 29, I will fight my way thru and make him cook for me. Sometimes it's v hard cos my hb work on shift and he is still doing his part time studies. I have to b v da fang if not what can I do?
Hazel, I totally agree with yr choice to get a local cl. My brother in law is one clear eg of being asked to go back to msia cos he enter into sg too frequently.
Chris, u can use that sentence to wake yr hb up. But there will b one day he grew sick of it and ignore u. Juz like my hb now. Now I m smarter. I buy things to standby. For home cooked food, u dun believe that my mum rather cook for my sister and her family or my brother and not cook any for me. She can make extra and ask us to pick it up... I dun stay far from her. Initially I cried a lot and told my hb and aunty. My aunty side me and told my mum off. Then my mum give us some chicken and fish for a period now back to square one. Bcos of work I alwaysvgo home after 7, my hb say eat out if not both of us v tired. Now I tell him my colleagues and laundry lady say my tummy is too small at week 29, I will fight my way thru and make him cook for me. Sometimes it's v hard cos my hb work on shift and he is still doing his part time studies. I have to b v da fang if not what can I do?
Last night I slept without Air con helping my hb to get used to it when bb arrive and when I do confinement. Hmmm my hb is trying his best to adjust haha... He din sleep till 3+... I guess I will continue this routine on weekends till he can sleep soundly without aircon.
Lucky mrt is not running this morning... I can sleep soundly till 9. Not trying to b evil but I m a light sleeper and the mrt sound can wake me up every morning at 5+
Lucky mrt is not running this morning... I can sleep soundly till 9. Not trying to b evil but I m a light sleeper and the mrt sound can wake me up every morning at 5+
