(2009/10) October 2009 MTBs

hey ladies,

see a fair bit of angst about work situations here. let me offer my perspective, being on the other side of the fence. i must say first that i'm not rubbing it in or gloating k?

1stly, i am sure its the hormones. cos when i first found out i was preggers, i was happy at first (for the wrong reason tho. cos was planning to study post grad, but unwillingly. so preggy no need to study. so very happy) then later i was upset. cos in the current environment, it will impede my chances of getting employed with any decent employers. so i was on the verge of a breakdown, because i couldn't come to terms with the fact that after so many years of climbing the corporate ladder (with some reasonable success) my career has come to a screeching halt.

so for those of you who are going to be SAHM (e.g. famela), you have my full admiration. because i'm not and cannot be such a selfless mum. i am sure it takes a certain DNA for one to completely give up her career for her kid and i dont have that genetic makeup in me.

i mean, hack, i'm still trying to come to terms with being financially dependent on the HB! i mean, the HB is great and the sweetest, but i want to bring home the bacon too. maybe cos i've always been rather ambitious lah.

of course, to each his own, and i have to say, please dont get overly stressed up at work, cos its just not worth it. it'll be great if your effort is recognised. but if its not? then what's the point right?

pace yourselves out a bit and gotta be a bit selfish lah. i mean its great to be responsible and professional at work. but if its causing a strain on you mentally or physically, then you better have a chat with your superior. otherwise touch wood if anything bad happens, HOW?

if possible get away for a short break. even if its like a day. somewhere away from the grind.
 


Famela: Me too me too! Sorella XL!! It's the low waisted boy legs. Very comfy, cheap and stretchy. I also have the triump one, more ex, not so stretchy, but very sheer (dries really fast), very light weight and equally comfy. Sadly they don't do XXL. I have a feeling I need to graduate to that size this time round. Time to start searching for alternatives.

Heh heh, Adril is a smart boy lah. Better give him what he wants or else.. see you in jail man!

Miemie: Think of the good stuff. You're going to have a cute bouncy bb soon who will inevitably become the love of your life soon, you have such a loving and supportive hubby.. and you're going on a holiday soon! Holiday does not have to be expensive, just a short break to a nearby place to get a breather. It'll do you good. Astro, maybe you can consider that too. Think Teng will love it too!

Fifidoog: Wow, such wise words from FiFi! Everyone heed heed! Like poor Mr Richard Stanley (with all due respect and bless his soul). Yeah he's paid (probably) obscene amount of money, but at the end of the day, it's just a job. Is it worth it to give up his life for a job? I don't think so.

For me I also not so wei-da to become SAHM because I can't afford to! (Although I would give anything to be a super rich tai-tai!!) I mean it's not like we can't survive on my hubby's pay alone but we will be poor lah, period. I don't want to be poor. I want to take home bacon so that I can go shopping! I am such a terrible mummy. heh
 
Sorry, PM was not on just now - Its now on...

BP for baby bjorn original / air carrier - Cheaper by 40% compared to Spore prices!

BP for desitin creamy 4oz, ready stock selling cheap.

BP for lansinoh milk bags - Shipment on the way already

BP for Capella strollers

BP for medela PIS advanced / freestyle US import
 
HRD: you're so right about it being a personal choice.. trust me when i say i used to be a very ambitious person too... hahaha! in teacher world that is. cos i've only ever dreamt of being that. boy did my family flip when i told them my choice of job. hah, i came from schools when being tops bananas and acing it was the norm. they said i was being silly! but i had big dreams for my career man - even though it wasn't in the corporate world - and i was right on track too. but then i had adil, and i had a HUGE paradigm shift. i think my bosses oso had a shock. when i went back to work after my ML and NPL they kept trying to build up my portfolio by piling me up with all sorts of added "responsibilities".. to "stretch" and "groom" they said. just means extra work to me by then. and i just cannot reconcile doing what i do at work while my child is taken care of by someone else la. maybe it's the fact that i'm teaching and i deal with kids on a daily basis and i see how wrong they can go..? and how far they can go with the right guidance as well. i always regretted the times i couldn't be with my son. cannot get rid of the guilt.

i think i'm echoing what most teacher parents complain of la: the fact they spend so much time at work with other people's children, then come back too exhausted to want to do anymore "teaching" with their own kids.

so now i really am enjoying my time with adil. catching up on lost times together. and he made my day yesterday by saying, "Mommy is Adil's favourite!" *beams* can't think of hearing anything better, man!

my long term goal is def to be a SAHM. but having said that, it's still a LT goal lor. dono whether feasible or not financially. like most of you, i have gotten used to bringing the bacon home too. and of course i have to consider my parents too. i give my mom 1k a month for their allowance and for taking care of adil while i'm working (so this one oso must think hard hard and see whether feasible to let them go without this extra income) and i have enjoyed the freedom of spending my own money. shopping is wayyyy too fun to give up completely so will be looking for alternatives. if i can find a job that takes up lesser time and allows me to balance family time too, hell, i'll go for it in a heartbeat.
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i've tried short stints of being SAHM and it's NOT easy. it's the Ideal for me but by no means easy lor. so short periods of work outside can oso help keep my sanity.
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i guess what i'm trying to say is that it really is a matter of choice... and sacrifices.
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either way, i think bottom line is Mommies are Superhumans la - they can do everything and anything for their children.
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sorry hor.. i didn't realise my post is so darn long! *blush* i think i too free now la...

chia: ^5! yeay for sorella!

oh one more thing to add: if i say bye bye to my job, there goes my dream of owning that 1ct diamond la.... sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh LOL! :D
 
Chiapatty, famela
M just offering my perspective being on the way side of the fence. M quite at peace w my whole situation by now. But i have to say if i wasnt preggers, i would've driven myself bonkers by now. Cos we often think the grass is greener on the other side. M just trying to tell u guys thats not necessarily the case.
Like famela, im pretty damn good at what i do n i can almost say my career has been my pride n joy. Im one of those idiots that look forward to gg to work kind. So when it came to a halt i was lost for quite awhile.
Every time i meet up with frens for lunch they say wish i dunhave to work. N in my heart im rolling my eyes out cos j know they dun mean it lor.

Its been a challenge for me, trying to stay relevant. Especially from an industry like mine. But m glad i still manage to hold rather intelectually stimulating conversations w ex colls when i see them lah. Somemore must put in effort to not look sloppy when i go out. Sigh..

Famela,
Kudos to u still. U r rite, think cos of your job lah. U see them day in day out. Btw, ur "ni men chaai na li" quite accurate already lah. Thumbs up!!
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famela: it was not a discussion.. it was informing. so 3 classes it will be.

HRD/Chia: thanks for ur views.

HRD: already went for trip to hongkong with teng in march.

i am given a pay rise.. a merit increment. what a joke.
 
astro,
sorry to hear that. =( if possible, try n go spend some time on ur own? even if its couple hours on weekend? if gg to spa is your thing, can try spa botanica in sentosa resort. that's my erm "escape from reality shelter".
 
HELLO ladies.
Just a question,
Is it advisable to use handheld massager? I use it on the neck and upper back. I'm aching all over!
I just went gynae yesterday but forgot to ask! ARGH! Oh, anyone know bb gender yet?
 
ww >> yakult vs vitagen - please choose yakult. the sugar in it is sucrose but the live bacteria used is different. yakult's l.casei shiroda strain's pH is not as acidic as vitagen's. though vitagen is less sweet and uses "real" fruit juice within it, it won't help with your acid reflux/heartburn now since it is of a lower, more acidic pH level...unless of course, you're a diabetic risk.

for the butt pain, i recommend u go for a light swim, stand still in water and raise the leg that is hurting and twirl it . worked for me..i had hell trying to walk normally and climb stairs..it's not completely gone now but it's so much better..
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as for the yoga class..ok, update in the next post and hope to see you there!

cheers...
 
PRENATAL YOGA CLASS FOR OCT MTBs...

remember i posted sometime ago abt this class? well, colleen simmonds (trainer) has opened one class for our forum apart from her usual sessions but it cannot be done on a weekend as she's busy teaching her other classes at tanglin mall and holland village. the prices are also coincidentally more expensive. for those who are mulling over it, don't worry there's time to see if you're still keen to be part of the Oct MTB class. Details are given here. If you're keen, you can always try out the first class and see how it goes..just email/PM if you're coming..

Date: 30 April 2009 Thursday
Time: 10:30 - 11:30am
Venue: Costa Rhu Condo Private Studio (Grd Floor)
Instructor: Colleen Simmonds www.colleensimmonds.com
What to bring: Yoga wear, your own yoga mat (it's ok if you don't have one but it'd be alot more hygienic), water and a small towel.
Trial Class $15 : Package of 4 classes $50 : Package of 8 classes $100

1. Sotong Mum
2. HRD
3. Jotti
4. Xoxolight
 
Nat >> the electric current could be either ultrasonic or high-frequency in nature for the handheld massager. that's not advisable esp if u target it around your belly..i read that it affects the fetus' brainwaves. i'm no scientist to determine how true that is but for the same reason, in cold countries, MTBs are encouraged to use other forms of in-room heating rather than rely on heated blankets.
 
xoxo,
psychic! i was just wondering when's our class... thanks for organizing. i better put it down on my schedule b4 i forget. ;)
 
Astro, Miemie, famela, HRD, chiapatty >> i've just returned from work today. few things made my blood boil and i think i am easily angered. stress... i am also definitely feeling it. at one point, i could feel my pulse race. all the lavender tea and spa music cannot help me.

this "to work or not to work" issue is also bogging me. how i yearn to be free from such dilemmas.

i am pretty sure my working days are quite numbered and though i constantly question myself whether it's the right choice (difficulty in assimilating the work culture once you've been out of it for 2yrs; reduction in free cash; change of family dynamics etcetera)..i have begun to see it more as a necessary sacrifice..nevermind if it pays off or not (no one can say if the babe will be smarter, more obedient if the mum is a SAHM), but i can try to make my babe feel more loved right?

i was feeling very obligated to settle all the unfinished business (like MieMie)..the rest you get at home isn't 100% cos your mind just wanders back to the work you've left at your table. so i am giving myself the next two months to do a done deal and we shall see.

i am also not housewife material and quite a few of my colleagues have voiced that they find it strange i am giving up on my career so prematurely. it's a sayang thing..and i do like what i do..so the compromise is that i've sent out feelers to say i am available on a freelance basis.

for mummies driven to despair at this pt by work..i think it's time to take a step back for a few days at the very least. our health is so important now and putting it under strain is not wise at all..and i am sorry to read the dread and helplessness you are facing. i really hope it improves for both of you..

last piece (sorry for the long-windedness)...my indulgence is now in enjoying massages at home. i am looking forward to having this lady come in at 11pm to do a massage for me..wheeeee...so at least i can hope for some good sleep.

i wish all of u a nicer day tom..take care!
xoxo
 
HRD >> got reminder SMS some more..hehehe, see my mood on the 29th!

oh yah yah yah..famela...i went to the john little warehouse sale yesterday..found my saviour undies..no brand, made in china, super plain type. $3 for 5..cheap hor..so i fig not much risk. the elastic is so lightweight..my waist was muttering thanks all the way today!..haha, also found no-wire bras for $5/ea....it's like i am back to school...plain everything..not that i was kinky, lacy, racy whatever!!! muahahahaha...

chiapatty>> last bit last bit...the baby..always whack one beat less. i tap two times, s/he taps once. i tap three, s/he taps two. i tap four...s/he taps..TWO again..so i fig there's a limit. only TWO beats..likes BBC world radio...it does get very restless in the morning so whenever the constant stream of voices come on..the babe gives me an easier time. no more poking like a mentos bead since though...my tummy is a little bellied now but i still don't look anywhere preggers..i am definitely going to experiment in front of my doc..but paiseh lah, if the babe don't cooperate....my doc will think i am quite suaku..
 
hi mummies ,

im selling off some items, do PM me if interested:

1) MEDELA MINI ELECTRIC (single breast pump)
-only bought in mid FEB, only used once, sterilised and back on box. giving baby FM so no longer need pump
selling at $150

2)PIGEON - Breastmilk cooler bag (brand new)
selling at $48

3)PIGEON - nursing pads 36s (unopened)
selling at $8

4) Huggies ultra newborn size 24s pack (opened), used 2 pc baby outgrow lia.

left 22pc selling at $5

5) MIM Sling- brand new, opened, sateen. Color-2 shades of purple
Selling at $40
-

self collection at mrt station (sembwg, admiralty, woodlands)
 
HRD: haha.. lucky correct!
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xoxo: you couldn't have said it better la..

<blockquote><hr size=0><!-quote-!><font size=1>quote:</font>

nevermind if it pays off or not (no one can say if the babe will be smarter, more obedient if the mum is a SAHM), but i can try to make my babe feel more loved right?<!-/quote-!><hr size=0></blockquote>

you remind me of what my P said to me a couple of years back which made me damn pissed. i went in to see her to talk about stepping down from certain things so that i can have more time with family and she said, "you know, you spending time with your son now will not guarantee that he will become a genius you know." like what the..?!! i don't want to spend more time to ensure that he becomes a genius!!! not my intention at all! the way i see it he'll be 1, 2, 3 years old etcetc only ONCE in his life and i want to be around for the stages more and see him grow and make him feel loved now, in the present. i want to play with him and do all those fun activities together. wait when he's bigger oso he won't want to cuddle or hug me as much even if i want to mah? older already i'm pretty sure he oso won't want to spend so much time with boring old mommy when he's got more interesting frens to hang out with. now he still wants so why not seize the moment rite? that's why i was so over the moon when adil said that i am his favourite yest. biggest reward i could hope for!
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that's what i was thinking all along la... stupid P rite?! makes my blood boil every time i think of the things she said to me.

but you're right right right.. main thing is the bonding with the kid and making him/her feel loved as much as poss.

again, no judgements here for those who think otherwise yah? i'm not saying that working moms love their kids less or anything liddat hor? back to personal choice issue. to each his own. that's my main reason for wanting to be sahm lor... spend as much time with children and love them the best i know how. what happens beyond that is really quite secondary.

oh and yeayyy for finding solutions to your underwear woes. hahhahah! and that's dirt cheap!!!
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famela>> is your P married with kids? i thot only pple who are not married or with no kids will say such insensitve words! so angry when i hear that!
my hubby's superior is also one kind, he is married for many years without any kids, and whenever something happens to the other colleagues' kids, and the colleague needs to take the day off to bring the kid to see doctor (or worse case, admit into hospital), this superior will give very unkind comments, its just fever, you shouldn't take the day off from work! blood boils everytime hubby tells me of his comments..
 
hello all,
seems like topics is on nv ending work! I am facing same problem as well. Was busy like hell over the last few days. tots of resignation pop up on my mind as well but trying hard to control. Practically dragging myself to work as foot getting heavier each day. Wondering hw to tahan for another 5mths+
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*sighs*
 
astro: You have been very morally responsible when you are trying your best. In fact you are doing very well. Excellent! Considering the fact that you already have a kid to take care. Sometimes others will use all kind of funny words to get things done at all cost. So we have to cool down and evaluate the 'cost'. At what cost? If something happens to me when i m so call trying to be morally responsible to all those ppl. I gather that they will simply say> I am sorry. But my bb and i ended up been overloaded with stress,toxic. The list goes on and on. Just do what you can.
 
ww: thanks for your kind words, very perceptive. i will see what i can do.. if it is too much. i wld leave. already lost some motivation liao.. i just see how low the motivation can go then.

Famela: ya. sucks big time. i am , interestingly, not the kind. motivated by $.
 
joanne: there's another thread on this forum.. that talks about the oscars, and amonia.. not much posts. but still soem useful links.. i remembered surfing on that when u expressed concern abuot the ratio. i remembered there is a link posted there..
 
Hi Mummies,

Sorry for being MIA yet again. My workload now is overflooding. Finally get to have some me time for now. Hehe.

Ok i really cant catch up with all the posts.

Hope all mummies are doing better since most of us are already or will be in our 2T.

Been having bad heartburns lately, always burping the acidic gas. Hate it! errkk!!

Btw does any of you experience really bad sharp cramps at your tummy each time you get up from the sofa too fast or when you get up from bed. I'm been having dat ley. Not always lah. Just when I turn wrongly or get up too fast. Is it anything I should be worried about? Never had this for the last 3...

Btw, I think it is confirm what I felt was the baby..coz now sometimes I can feel it like moving slowly instead of the jerky kicks I get.
 
shugar: i think u r the one who asked about where to get comfy maternity pants. i got mine from mum-r-us at novena sqaure or united sqaure.

yesterday i had a talk with my super big boss, and he never make snide remarks to me, unlike what he said to some other colleagues. he just told me that i just need to teach my colleague to take over my admin duties. i told him i would feel very tired, plus i'm prone to giddiness, and he was quite understanding. so hopefully everything will be ok.

One of my colleagues actually asked me to teach a 2-min dance to a huge group tomorrow. practised today and i felt so tired. going to rope in helpers.
 
Hi Everyone,

Sorry I mia for quite a while. Went to KL for a week and Genting for another.

All these talks about work, it reminds me of my. I "sold" myself to my work last year, bringing laptop back and working through the night, sometimes till 3-4am. At that time, I just want to prove myself and show everyone that I can make it despite unfavorable circumstances. In the end, a new GM came, and he's one who is an outsider to the industry and also a brother in law to my VP. He force my snr accountant and me to do things that are against our principle. So my snr accountant resigned and I resigned together with her in Jan, at a point when we are going into recession and at a point when I did not find a job yet. After I resigned, I had 3 job offers. But when I discovered that I'm preggie, I decided to be a SAHM(no choice actually) and I'm thankful that I have resigned b4 I know I'm preggie. If not, I will surely stay on, not wanting to waste that 4 months maternity leave! I will be so stressful now!

MieMie / Astro,

To me, I'm lucky in a way cos I'm not caught in any work committment issues now. But ask yourself, if one day you fall sick and require people to take care of you (touch wood), who will will be the one? Your boss or your family? To me, it's rather a simple choice. At the rate you guys are going, it's going to be tougher when you reach the last stage of your pregency. Never let your job to take over your life.

Sorry if I sound hash or kpo :p it's just my 2 cents worth.
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Oh ya, I have just come back from my gynea visit and my edd has been push back again! 15/10/09 now. My baby is so cute... totally upside down! And my gynea told me...... you are most likely going to have a boy
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I'm rather disappointed
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as I'm hoping for a girl (1st is a boy too) I sms my hubby immediate and told him I cannot close factory. Cos I turly want a girl and we are going to try for a 3rd with him going vegetarian once our son is born!
 
sotong mum, yes I totally agree. Dats why I never bring my work home and will only press the on button of my lappie when necessary. Workload is a never ending task, so I believe we should just take it one step at a time. No point proving so much, especially in our current condition.
 
sotongmum, you are hilarious! Hahaha!! Ya lah only 2 wat, dont close factory yet. How many weeks are you now?

Not sure if I'm able to see the gender for my upcoming scan. I'll be 15 weeks by then. Will be too early rite?
 
sotongmum,
hahahahaha very funny lah u... everyone around me's anxious abt gender of our bb. tom gg to see gynae. next week will be NT scan. wonder if we'll see anything "interesting"
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VP,
yeah only 2 huh? how do you manage 4??? *kow tow*
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ong: thanks. Find that most of them hv only DS find in the oscar test. Nt much on ES. Anyway will not think too much untill my amnio test done &amp; result out.
 
VP~ i do get that kind of discomfort when i sit up or sit down too quickly. Usually have to stay seated untill the feeling subsides. yes, we shd try to be gentler from now onwards ;P
 
VP,

I'm in Finance line so there's always this never ending deadlines to meet. If I'm working now, my boss will surely be very happy cos my dd is 15/10, just nice to see through sept close!

HRD / VP,

I'm in my 14th week. When I'm having my 1st boy, I know the gender in my 13th week. What I know is that boys are easier to see but girls normally can be confirm only at a later date. Now I'm hoping for some "mistake". :p

HRD,
Remember to post your scan! Just now, I was asking my gynae, "my baby head so big?!" gynae replied "that's his body my dear!" :D

Joanne,

Have postive thoughts. U can't do anything now expect to wait for your oscar test. So don't drown on it, have happy thinking and everything will turn out fine.
 
HRD, I have a maid, so I guess that's where I get the xtra pair of hands and legs..hahah!! But I tink (hopefully) will be managable lah. I always tink when God give us another blessing, he will surely give us a way to handle it.
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Sotongmum, yeay! dat means I might be able to the gender this coming scan..But my maternal instincts is just telling me its a boy...hmm we'll see in 2 weeks time.

Oh yah the end of 3rd quater. I'm in sales, so with reportings and all I guess our deadlines are almost the same timing.
 
Errrr.....VP, my maternal instincts told me it's a girl leh >_<

Hahahahaha in all coy that I work for, we always "fight" with the sales people!
 
long time no read all ur posts... hb's laptop is down. so for now he's using mine. feel so handicap w/o my own laptop.

anyway, sounds like work is a very troublesome factor for us now... i cant stand the smell at my workplace. i get nauseas and giddy. so got to stay at home to work now. but w/o laptop? that's crazy. hahaa..
 
sotong mum: i agree with u.. though Miser viewed it that i am worrying slightly too much.. but he said i shd just try. and if really cannot. then quit.. or convert to part time..

i had my oscars too.. the radiographer.. at the onset already said.. 'the bb is too young to scan for anything else'.. ha.. so there u go.. dun expect them to pick up on anything.. coz just picking out the NT and the nasal bone are enough to irritate them if the bb wun cooperate!
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joanne: on top of what ong suggested, this was the very brief thread i saw..it is brief but this is more specific with not as good oscars results..
http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/messages/2052338/2295654.html?1239035552

VP/hope/pu: alamak.. i just posted that osmetime back.. i think it is called round ligament something.. coz the roundish ligament in the womb gets stretched as womb expands so hence we experience the pain.. forgot the url liao. else can direct u all ther efor a better read..

hey. should we organise a common sharing site or something ah? then we read anything.. then can post there or file it up.. then we can always direct and refer there! good idea?
i only know google groups.. anyone knows of a better sharing portal?

btw, i like the support we give to one another here.. continue that hor!!
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*dance around.. to cheer myself up*
 
hi mummies!

i am back from work early. covered the press launch at tampines1..back breaking. there was quite a crowd for a weekday...manpuku restn is really interesting. i am now so tired as usual lah. found the maternity belt extensions at mothercare so hopefully i can rescue my jeans...

astro >> cheer up..i am not used to a sulky astro..yr idea of a group archive by topics is a pretty good one. that way we don't have to repeat ourselves too much...also we can update progress etc??

oh..and do u know that 2 famous celebs share the same EDD as all of us? Mrs Wayne Rooney and Mrs Tony Leung aka Carina Lau...muahaha, Oct looks set to be Busy Baby Month lor...
 
astro,
*put my hand up, hiding in the closet* i donch want to say that out loud tho. cos we always say as long as bb is healthy. but i think gg by genetics, *sigh* its gonna be male. both generations only got 2 gals, the rest of the army are boys.
you're quite cute lah. as least today can still crack jokes. thats good to see. my HB is a bit one kind with consolation. but i think it may be applicable here. he always say "if the situation is beyond your control, then dont waste time/emotion getting upset or stressed about it. just try your best and that's that lor" although i have to say everytime the idiot says that to me, i wanna slap his stupid head. so hehehe... dont slap my stupid head!
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Pu,
ah... was wondering where u went?!

sotongmum,
eh my scan's not as crystal clear as you guys here leh. i can hardly see it clearly myself. so thot no point. somemore my scanner acting up. we'll see tom ;)

VP,
still, 4 is a great big effort!
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HB and I used to say, either we have none, or we have 2. so when i got preggers, i said "hmm... now we gotta make 2". he looked at me funny and said "i think you better get thru #1 first and then we see how k?" hahahahaha... he knows me too well. i'm freaked out reading about delivering the baby. HB can only give me a helpless look.
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xoxo,
what's manpuku? jap? was thinkg of gg but decided agst it. too crowded. i can wait. bro told me gotta queue to get into Uniqlo. how ridiculous is that???
 


oh yah, going to see gynae tom. gonna make sure i bomb all my submarines out first before i go there. then maybe can weigh a bit less??? hehehehe...

started the DHA caps (with calcium, iron &amp; vit c) last weekend. WAH LAU EH!!!!! SI BEY STINK LOR!!!!!!! who makes those freakin things and tell us they're good for our baby's brains??? i wanna gag everytime i have to burb, which is like every freakin other min.
 
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