(2008/06) June 2008

For confinement, i understand tat must give mum/MIL (whoever taking care of u) AP bec' its more auspicious. Just put yr extra allowance in red packet.

I haven't decide how much to give my mum. Cos i be providing food myself (getting confinement food delivery svc) and i be doing the feeding if breastfeeding. So my mum will be helping to take care of me (e.g. help prepare water for bathing), bath bb, change nappies for bb. My bro will be coming over to stay too but most likely he may not help much.

Maybe i get my hb to contribute cos the confinement food svc is ored costing me $1300.
 


ellysia,
cant get my own mother cos she is sick n she stay too far away anyway, my MIL stay oni a couple of blocks away within a 3 min walking dist from my hse...
 
cactus,
i figure yr hb is alredy givin yr mil mthly allowance n had to share the cost of maid, tink a token of AP wil be enough bah. for me to choose, i wil gif nice fig like $288, 388 etc. personal comments onli, no needa take it to heart ah.

as for me, my mil n mum wil be helpin me out during confinement on shift basis, morn n aftn session. hb mentioned to his mum if she wans pkt $$, but mil reject wo. my mum i aso wun be givin cos she sure dun wan my $$. both my dad n fil stil workin and both mummies not in need of $$. so we totally drop e idea of giving AP wo..
 
Thanks for your input, Ellysia, mrswrx.
I quite like your suggestion mrswrx. I also think must give MIL something as a nice gesture. at least, she won't tell pple or my SIL that we never give right? Maybe $288 or $388.
happy.gif


My dad will be looking after the bb, we will employ maid for him and move back to stay with him. my dad is not getting extra allowance from us - he declined. he's presently getting $200/month from me. didn't want to take more.
 
crystal,

In tat case do u want to get a confinement lady to standby?

But i scare yr MIL only say those words as "Qi Hua" angry words.. so scarry later she change back and say she want to help liao. U know.. old folks tend to be like this.
 
Cactus
The Head of Dept so far i mentioned are the really old man (pass 55yrs at least) in each of the dept:
1) Cardiac is Prof Wong Keng Yean
2) Antenatal Diagnostic Clinic is Prof George Yeo Seow Heong
I think in scans, these 2 will attend to me cos they nd to communicate to determine the final arrangement. Other than that, the consultations are those normal doctors which so far cum nthg useful in their explanations. The next time is i just nd a neonatal incline gynae like u mentioned.
 
iamsnow,
i m fine, jus let me noe by tml if yr hb acc u to e talk anot la. i go or dun go wun be big diff la. i heard frm my frens, abbott not stingy in givin freebies. saw them givin away cans of FM last yr at KKH seminars. dunno tis yr they givin cans or pkts.
 
cactus,
i checked n called PEM oreadi but px also quite ex + now i temporary not wking, a bit xiong on the wallet. so m thinking of doing confinement on my own wif hb's help. will definitely be tiring but try lor.

jamsnow,
i oreadi blind n deaf to her liao. my r/ship wif IL side still consider pretty gd except on this confinement issue. long n back-dated but it keeps coming up nonetheless. if i repeat myself here again, think i sure kenna hattam. i myself also quite sick of the matter.

heart-pain? confirmed!!! i so sad to see all my hair gone. the saloon lady even asked me whether i wan to bring back some of my long hair home for remembrance. i told her the more i see my long hair, e more heart-pain i feel, so i rather dun c lor. i always trim one but tis time my MIL's confinement issue reai pushes me off n i harden my heart n cut my hair off lor. 1 less thing to bother abt comes confinement.
 
felicia,
i no choice lar....*sob sob*....dun mention my long hair anymore, i wanna cry liao...now refraining from looking at myself in the mirror....
 
crystal,

OIC confinement on yr own.. maybe u want to book confinement food then?

Dun worry abt hair, will grow back by the time u finish confinment.
 
Wow girls, this thread is flying! been super busy the whole day till now. it has been an interesting read on yao lans and strollers.

cactus,
Yah, i think it's good to give a token sum, also as a sign of appreciation to your MIL.
happy.gif


crystal,
just cut lah, hair will grow back one, that's always been my philosophy in life, if want to cut, then really cut not trim. hehe. So my hair which was shoulder-length is now a bob (ending below my ears). Trust me, it is a lot more easier to maintain and much cooler, also cos I have those big natural curls, short hair suits me better now. I can't imagine sitting for hours to rebond my hair. Anyway, my gynae told me it's perfectly fine to colour my hair so i just coloured last weekend.
happy.gif
 
ellysia,

U r going to order 2 meals a day for ur confinement food? Coz from my previous experience the portion is quite big. For me, i'll be calling confinement catering as well this times, but only for lunch, as i'll keep half of it for my dinner.
 
TinyFeet, don't worry about getting a "neonatology inclined" gynae. what I meant was to get an experienced O&G doctor, maybe senior consultant, cos chances are he/she would have good working relationship with an experienced neonatologist.

Crystal - it's going to be taxing to do confinement on your own. perhaps you can do as much prep as possible before bb comes, so you will be less flustered. buy the packs of chinese herbs for your bathes in advance also.
 
Ellysia
I agree the thread move so fast, no time to reply too. This site talks abt how to stimulate the brain http://www.yesphonics.com/BabyGeniusProgramP2.htm, then i will from here surf further to find out supplier or how Phonogram works

Cactus
For me, I may give Ang Pow $2K to my mum for helping me during the 1 mth confinement. Afterall i will nd to lose this $ if i engage a CL too. I will buy the necessary herbs, etc.. for the food side b4 i deliver. She still get her usual monthly allowance $500 fr me.
 
jamsnow,
thanks, would appreciate if u can pass me her contact n i touch base wif her then? think u can PM me. but i would need her in mid-may onward. happen u ve an idea abt the kind of px she charges?

liew,
my time for haircut was pretty short - 30 mins wif styling cos i think the lady knows i cant sit too long. yup, no coloring for now, thanks for the reminder.
 
ellysia,
that's what i worry wor.. many ppl said that after confinement mth we may drop hair! so my hairstylist inform me must use special shampoo for reduce hair drop.
 
crystal,

agreed with cactus tat is going to be taxing to do confinement on your own. I had experience doing it for 2 weeks during my #1. Especially bb bathing is not easy, somemore you'll be goin for c-sec, rite?
Or at least u had to get some nurse that can go to ur house and help out on bb bathing.
 
Felicia brought up a good point, Crystal. C-section is not a joking matter. you will be in pain for a couple of weeks. really. and you may have problems moving around or squatting or bending over cos of the wound. you may also need to find positions to breast feed your bb too.
 
Felicia,

I am a bit big eater even before pregnancy. I tink if the portions is too big, i share with my mum or bro. They are even big eaters than me.

liew,

The hairs that drop are suppose to drop during pregnancy but pregnancy slow down hair fall..so i guess not v bad in that case??

If u need shampoo to reduce hair loss, can buy frm mumessentials.
 
Crystal
If u have your MIL to do initially, do u intend to pay her? If so, take it as tat spend on engaging CL and yet less obliging on your side too. Try calling Bliss if u still cant find one.
 
TF,

Tats a very generous AP!!
Me quite broke liao.. overspend during CNY.. i got 3K credit card bills this mth, faintx.
 
Ellysia,
That'll be quite long leave leh. Understand most companies only give like 2 days paternity leave. In my case, the leave not applicable cos hubby's a teacher but just nice, Jun is school hols, he will be able to help out in that 1 mth.
happy.gif
 
TF,

The right brain website link u given, i noticed the consultant tat they mentioned is the same one who will give the last talk on the mum congress at Sheraton Towers (15march).
 
crystal, oh dear. Try not to do confinement yourself as you are doing C-sect, which will be very bad and tiring for you. Can let me know how much is your budget? I try to ask around for you for cheaper rate (maybe around 1.4K - 1.6k, have to check if they available or not). Can you PM me your address if you interested?
 
ellysia,
but mostly i heard from them is after give birth mths. they said hair drop quite serious ..
i may use japan brand shampoo which my hairstylist
intro to me..(forgot the brand of the shampoo)
 
Ellysia
Cos i tot if i get a CL @ $1.8K, is the same loss of $ loh. So might as well let my mother have it loh. Some more my parents are nt so calculative wif $ and that they have been buying food n ensuring i eat properly. Whereas allowance, i treat it separately cos i still have to gv even if i nt preggie or stay wif them. Only thing is ha, i didnt spend much on maternity clothes, only $50 so far on my own clothes, 1 bottom n top. And the nursing bra i get the $9.90 from Beauty World there...keke...cheepsake on myself abit. The only dream nw i wnt for myself is to stay in the A1 ward if can..haha. Then hubby company pay.
 
ellysia,
i think mostly i need the person who really can take care of me during confinement is my mum instead of my hb...:p
 
My hb considering to take 1 week leave to help out. I tink my house will be congested with people when tat time come.
 
Ellysia
U r alert!! Was from the mum congress itinerary tat strike me to find out more abt Shichida, then i went to surf this morning... so just started on this as kick off.
 
Ellysia
I make my hubby take leave in first 2 weeks at least to cum n help my mum during CL. More so i wnt him to participate in taking care of his own son, in bathing, changing nappy, etc.. Dun wnt to spoil him in everything dunno hw to do else next time i suffer. :p
 
ellysia / mrswrx,
it is not "qi hua"...the most hb n me can get out from her is prob oni the confinment food for lunch n dinner, even then she claims she doesnt know how to cook them cos my SIL (her daughter) dun eat them during confinement then.

there r lots of issues surrounding tis matter which result in me not wanting to stayover at her plc for confinement. i used to ve a thread on this matter but cant locate it anymore.
sad.gif
 
ellysia,
my hb wun be taking leave lor.. he too busy at work liao. even when i hospitalised for food posion last mth, he aso nvr take leave, jus visit me 1hr n go work or go hme liao. he expects me to be independent wo.
 
tera,
my gynae disallow me to colour nor highlight my hair. if i go ahead n do it, sure she will scold me when she sees me. hb also says hair grow back but still very heartache..
 
liew,

Is it.. then i better get from mumessentials in advance. Do u use the shampoo during confinement or after?

TF,

Yes the name strike a resemblance..

So u want to go for the talk? maybe he will sell his pdt there.. can take a look at the same time.

In this case maybe i re-consider to go liao.. but cos i got concert at night, i need to discuss with my mum cos may need to eat dinner with them then go concert so dunno got enuff time in btw.. plus my mum is v slow coach type.

My credit card bill is cos i spent on buying CNY clothes for my mum and bro.. sigh. then CNY cos nothing to do so they wanna watch movies so spent extra + restaurants makan + CNY eve dinner etc..

for AP on confinement, i tink i give a few hundreds maybe but most likely i ask hb to contribute so i dun tink it be a lot.. dun tink my hb so generous to my mum.
 
crystal,
heh, i guess diff gynae diff style, mine told me "why not" since i've already passed 1st trim plus i'll only be colouring hair once during pregnancy. in any case, if your gynae will scold you then better dun do it. cheer up, hair will grow quite fast one!
happy.gif


girl, i also think u shld try to get a CL esp after what the other girls mention about the difficulty/pain after c-section. is ur mind made up that u won't get one? maybe can pm Veniz to see if she can help source around?
 
crystal,

I know the topic.. i ever read before lah.. roughly can remember.

In this case, i guess u better get a CL. At least one part time one maybe, dun need to cook but can wash yr clothes & bath bb. U may not want to touch water during confinement as its best to minimise washing during tat period.
 
crystal,
i tink its betta for u to hire CL liao. dun stress yrself after child birth. confinement is e time to rest more. as long as yr hb stands by yr side, everythin will be jus fine.
 
cactus,
i ve got the those herbal bath foam n shampoo from little dreamers oreadi. a fren used their pdt before n recommend them to be pretty good, so i be saving time n effort in cooking the actual herbs n boiling the water.

felicia,
i intend to sound hb out abt extending my inital stay in RH from 4 days (mandate for c-sec cases) to an additional 2 days totalling it at 6 days stay so tat 1 wk of confinement oreadi gone. hopefully by then the wound is much better n not so raw. then left wif 3 wks of confinement back hm, hb will try to help as much as he can, such as he will be the one showering the bb after he is back from wk n all. he will also do the laundry n basic hsework. think i be closing more than jus 1 eye on the hsework part n make do wif minimum till i recover lor.
 
Crystal
Wld be gd just settle wif CL. I can understand nt easy to do confinement in in-law place. My mum-in-law also wnted me to do at her hse initally (more so cos his son will be back and she dun like to see son stay at my parents place). But my hubby n me agree nt to do confinement at my in-law cos she cant manage herself, weigh almost 80-90Kg, n also hubby n me does nt like the hygiene at in-law. Also, my in-law always talk abt $ n we dun like. So, drop the idea on relying on in-law in your case so as to reduce conflict too. Cos confinement may come wif confinement stories wif in law later.
 
Ladies,

Anyone of you experience Bratox Hicks?

Me having that now. Very Xin Ku. Anyone can teach me how to count? Do we count it like 1 tightening once, or the series as once.

I had Bratox Hick and on medication. I stop med cos no more Bratox hicks. But now suddenly attack. This time different from the rest. Now is like tightening and let go, den tightening again. Last time mine one tightening for a period of time, and stop.

My gynea not open today. Anyone can help by explaining to me?
 
Ellysia
ha.. my hubby n me have same account, so no diff who gives. Aiya, u working got salary to take, i no salary to take ya. No, i nt going for the talk. Will do research from web. Cos hubby nt ard to attend i sian. Tat y i also sian to go for Antenatal class.
 
my hubby will take 2 weeks leave during confinement, tats oso provided his boss wont call him to go bak in last minutes. But this times i had mil's help, plus i'll order confinement food, so everything shld be quite manageable.

Crystal,
Is better you call confinement food service if ur mil is not so willing to do it. My advise to you is prepare contingency plan now if suddenly ur mil back out everything.
During my #1, initially i plan to had my mum to help out , but just a week before my delivery, my mum undergone operation due to cervical cancer. And i'm not able to find reliable CL in such short time and had to get my mil's help instead. But as she's working that time, she can only help out for the 1st 2 weeks. And myself had to do confinement by myself for another 2 weeks with the help of my younger sister. My sister can only help in washing clothing, cleaning up the house, prepare bath water only. And most of the things i had to take care myself including bathing for baby, feeding bb day and night. It was really a mission impossible job for me at tat time which i almost collapse. Luckily is only 2weeks but it really hurt my health. After the 1st delivery, i found myself easily fall sick and always pain here, pain there. So, before conceive for #2, i went to TCM to build up my health and even go for 'tui na' to get rid of all the pain.
So, plan now.
 
jamsnow/veniz,
thanks, i ve PM u gers oreadi. much appreciated.

TF,
yes, intend to give her AP but think not as much as paying for a FT C.Nanny lar. however, having said tat, wat hb n me intend was beside the point cos she simply wanted us to move into her hse to stay there for confinement wif 7 other pple all squeezing into a HDB flat of which 2 are kids! she simply refused to leave the 8 yrs old n 6 yrs old nephews alone wif the maid n my FIL n their parents (at nite) n prioritise her new granddaughter here, so i leave it at tat.
 
crystal,

I agree confinement is v impt to take care of yr health.

My mum has experience of pains too which she tink is due to her confinement not doing properly.

I tink it be better for u to stay at yr own hse than move in her house, but best to get some help. Do u have siblings to help? Or get a friend to help??
 
crystal,
How much xtra u need to pay if you extend ur stay @ hosp? Does it worth it? Maybe you shld make a comparison if you can get a full time or part time CL.

Hair loss : I read up in some where tat to minimise hair lost after delivery, dont stop ur supplements immediately after your delivered. You can still continue to take the supplement like fish oil, obimin that you had been taking during preggie. You can reduce the supplement slowly, maybe take alternate day and only stop about 2-3mths after delivery. This can reduce the amt of hair loss.
 
Felicia,

I understand frm my clinic nurse that we shd continue taking fish oil and vits especially if we are breastfeeding.

In addition i saw this milk powder for mum by Similac, good for pregnancy so dunno want to get 1 can or not
happy.gif
 


Crystal
Best is dun speculate on what her intentions nw as wont help much but make u feel worst. Smtx old people hv their way of funny thinking and we cant change the fact. So since already knw even if u move over also got so much problem, so to make yourself happy n less dependent, do wif CL n catering food, etc. U may even find it a blessing that she is the one that withdraw doing confinement for u, then u hvg to tell her u dun wnt her to do confinement. Look forward, things will be better from here ya
happy.gif
 
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