dear mel, rc_cola, angeline, chomecc, winnie, pooh_astro, ytanhn and all the mummies out there, thank you all so much for showing such great support for me at this point of time when I am feeling right at the bottom.
Indeed, i really dun know why on earth would a mother encourage her son to file divorce when the kids are so young. Actually, throughout my marriage, we already faced many problems and had great friction against each other. But for the sake of my kids and hb, I tolerate all my mil nonsence and unreasonable request. in the past i ever posted in the forum how she humilate me before and even make unreasonable request to ask me to do.
The most unforgetable incident i will never forget is this, i could still rem when i was pregnant with the 2nd baby, i was only ard 2 to 3 mths pregnant, u know what she did? she ask me to get up everyday at 630am to sweep the floor and do bit of housework, then wash my own clothes and hb clothes, hang them then i can prepare myself to go to work. Shit lor...i lead that kind of life for 1 month plus until when I went for the next gynae check up, my gynae saw me losing weight and didn't look good, she asked me was i overworked and stress? she wanted to give me few days MC to rest at home. I told gynae that I was being asked to do housework from 630am. even after work when reach home, i also had to wash dishes, pots and pans, clean up table then i can go and shower, Everytime after shower, its already 10pm le. i dont get enough rest. Work in office was also tiring too. My gynae looked at my hb, she even told hb that i am not suppose to do so much housework, she asked hb to help me. that time, my hb still felt quite embarassed in front of my gynae and cause of that, he agreed to help me do and let me rest. When my mil saw that how come i suddenly didnt do the normal routine which she plan for me, she indirectly asked hb why i become so lazy. hb didnt dare to tell his muim wat the gynae said, he only said that "oh, my wie is tired so i do for her lor" like that. of course my mil think that i lazy la...from then, my whole 2nd pregnancy became a chore to me whenever i am at home. cause i feel very stress, need to hide myself in the room all the time in order to avoid doing things.....
haiz..very sad story lor......
now, because my mil only wants to take the kids, thats why she so confidently ask my hb divorce me. cause she thought she sure will get the kids mah. she is a malaysian, and i heard that in malaysia, even if a couple wan to fight and get custody of children, the court will surely give to the male side. she must be thinkin that it applies to the spore court too lor.
winnie, so glad that u can help me. I got few questions:
1) if really my hb divorce me for no good reason other than cause of his mum, does he still need to give me mantainence?
2) i have a family court PPO issued against him, to protect him from using violence on me with effect from 26/12/07. If he refuse to open hios home door for me to go and get back mu stuff, can i go to the police?
3)my baby is with me, i took him together with me back to my mum place. if he really wan to fight custody of both kids, will he really stand higher chance than me? cause he is rearning much more money than i am.
4) my hb now is in bank debts cause he used 2 creditcards until overlimit. if he use this as reason to dun give me mantainence fee, will he suceed?
5)my elder boy was look after by my mil since young, mil has taught him many things and said many things to him which are to my disadvantage, thats y now, he does not even look for me even when he dun see me at home. he is closer to father. if the court gives me the custoday of my elder boy but he dun wan to follow, does my hb have the right to fight back and say he wan to take my elder boy?
6) even if my income is not enough to full support my baby, will court make decision base on this and give custoday to my hb? can i askhb for mantainence fee for baby to be given to me instead, and i still remain taking the custoday of my baby?
sorry..i really got so many questions to ask...cause there is no one to turn to for help....
please try to help as much as u can...i will be really grateful....
Thanks....