(2007/02) February

Gig - I wanted a maid, hb doesn't want; bt anyway these fw days I may bring up the issue to him again, then 2mr when we r @ PIL hse, I will ask SIL again if she can help me monitor. I even told her, she can ask the maid to help her out w/ the hsewk. Imagine she has her nephew who is just fw mths old nw leh....... by then is nt even 1yr old yet.

Maternity clothes - I agree w/ Gig. All tops still can tahan bt then bottoms shld hv changed long ago. Bt it maternity bottoms or drawstring bottoms frm Gio. Oh, just nw I passed by RP Gio, they hv dunno wat 20% off. I din chk them out cos I wasn't keen in buying.

Gig - ^5! I also like mooncakes w/ seeds!
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giggler
coz boyboy's got pray to guangyin, so he say better not to eat beef. i oso go guanyin temple but i still eat beef. :p ai yah bb is both of us, so let him be lor, dun eat beef these few months. anyway that time in japan, i think i even eat raw beef :x. my wedding dinner, he oso go change my live drunken prawns away into scallops, say dun wanna the live prawns to die so pitifully that day. I think the joy of that dish is to see the prawns jumping up n down in liqor kekeke :p

i oso have not start using stretch mark cream. gibe me a few more weeks :p

had another argument with boyboy last nite. dun feel like letting him see the bb's gender this detailed scan.
 
ah ger,
i have not been to sze chuan court buy the mooncakes before. i duno whether it is the same as the one i ate which states raffles the plaza. but i oredi made my request beri clearly to boyboy, "white lotus paste with marcadia nuts from raffles the plaza and D24 durian mooncakes from emicakes". Dunno whether will receive them or not. hahahaa
 
kiddy palace maternity wear nice or not? Compasspoint got one branch and i dun have time to go anywhere else these few days.

btw, Perfect mum from suntec sms say got new stock
 
Smurfy - so long as u dun eat beef @ hme, infront of guanyin is ok. I dun like beef all along cos I dun like red meat, & tat incls duck. Bt ever since I m preggie, I made myself eat a little. Bt till nw I still can't bring myself to eat sliced pork, so only minced pork or liver. :p

Smurfy - care to reveal which restaurant u booked @?

Wat happen? Y dun wanna show him the gender?
 
Smurfy - I've bn wanting to chk out if Emicakes Durian mooncakes r nice or nt. Cos 1st time I hear them doing. Bt none has eaten b4......

Kiddy Palace maternity wear, erm....... I only took some glance. They are more on the floral printed ones. I think my sis has some, bt those plain cols ones look rather oldish. Bt I din take a closer look since I've already bought my clothes.

Smurfy - tat day I already posted here, PM has new stock. Bt I dare nt lay my eyes on them, I scared I may buy, so I *ctrl ctrl ctrl*
 
ah ger?
what hotel booked @.

dunno lar, angry with him coz of wedding preparation issues. he used to tell me everytime his family wins 4d (his family bet a lot). this time he never tell me, my mum realised the familar number and ask him. what? he scared i purposely choose expensive si dian jin coz i knw of winfall arr? why shld i let him knew the gender first when i knw his family zhong nan qin nu and the budget might be differnt upon knowing the gender? then all these while, his family never care abt me during this pregnancy, no one brewed tonics, not even canned birds nest. only my poor mum making it for me after work even in weekends.
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i always talk to bb, telling it to remember everything, remember who takes care of mummy when she is weakest, who brewed tonics for it and who worries most abt mummy's health.
 
cmy, i apply long term pass for my son.. is a half year pass... den renew again..
my this secong baby will be malaysian pr, cuz like that more easier to put her there.. my son initially can take the pr, but exceed the qualifying period ( 1 year old ).. so cannot lor.. this time round we know how to get the pr for this baby, so much more easier...
 
gals, is anybody here taking confinement lady? My gf, has this auntie thru an agency. She said tis auntie is very gd. She is responsible, then looks after her bb very well. Her cooking is nice also. Nighttime when her bb couldn't slp, she stayed up thru'out to look after for her. Then nx day my gf asked her to slp, she only caught an hr slp then woke up to take over frm my gf cos she said my gf very weak, better rest more on bed.

Though she is thru agency bt she can do on personal basis also. My gf asked if I m getting CL, I said CNY CL is very exp. She asked the auntie, then the auntie say c hw much I m willing to pay then she consider lor. Bt again I can't b gng over the board like too low for her lor. Besides CL wat u pay them does nt incl the $$ for mktng leh.

So if any of u are interested then u are 2wards mth end & wish to consider a CL, let me know then I ask my gf for her #.
 
emidurian mooncakes very nice. i like. eating durians like that, got the pulps kekekeke. but one box is $48 if i remember correctly. some ppl find it not worth it and thinks eating the real durian is better.

someone just passed me another pc of mooncake from raffles plaza. very nice again. must make my request louder liao :D
 
smurfy - I type salar, meant to ask restaurant. Ha ha ha.....

Hmm, y suddenly ur boy bcme so sensitive? Wats tare to b scared of? Tat time I wanted so much to hv si dian juan bt I dare nt raise up to PILs. Then FIL only willing to pay dunno hw much only cos prev 2 DIL also tat amt. I was very sad cos I felt FIL was very stingy. Then MIL said nvm she will top up for me cos she said she rather buy smething I will wear than nt wearing them.

Bt I also helped them save abit of $$ leh. I tried to get the cheaper range then we brought MIL tare. Bt she said nt as nice. Then I told Lee Hwa shop I dun need ring cos I will use my solitaire as replc over it. Bt end up I spent abt $2.5k I think. I even used my Lee Hwa $$s to offset watever I can.

Dun b angry, tell ur hb, u r nt those kind of ppl. Besides after being 2gether w/ u for so long, he shld know u well right? Dun let tis upset ur r/s & mood.

His family is really those zhong nan qing nu one? Ur hb is the only son or only child? Some elders r like tat, prefer boys. Bt again ur hb shld side u & tell them tat so long as bb is healthy, they shld b blessed rather than *touchwood* some ppl get wat they want bt nt 100% healthy, right? Just try to tok to ur hb calmly, things def can b worked out.
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Smurfy, I can understand your saddness, bt then u so bad leh, tell ur bb like tat. ha ha ha, skali when ur bb is out, b it gal or boy they also equally dote then ur bb nx time rebel hw?

Koh - I dun understand. Wat log in/ out?
 
ah ger, no la, my collegue loh.. she use my com to log in to this forum, u see the nick...(annmum).. never log out.. den i use her acc to reply cmy.. scared she don know who i am so tell her annmum is my collegue accounts loh... hee
 
Smurfy, I know Emicakes' Durian cakes are nice bt then tis time round is mooncakes leh, also equally nice?

Smurfy - urs arh EDD 21 Feb, dunno will eat into 18 - 19 Feb or nt. I dunno leh. I told my gf, I heard CNY CL can go up to almost dbl, which is like $2.5 -2.7K. Then even if we can neg, the lowest we can go is abt $2.2 - $2.3k bah. Hw much is ur hb willing to pay? Normal CL already is abt $1.6 - 1.8k right? Ur mum is nt gng to help u in confinement?

I dare nt quote a low price, besides I nv had much intention of engaging, so I told my gf I will consider & let her know.

Or do u want me to ask the CL to quote an estimate then I let u know?
 
oh.......... bt Koh, u can just change the username & password @ the bottom then ur name will b reflected le. No need to use her name lah.
 
Smurfy

dont be angry with ur hb becos of some other person things. maybe he also forgot or he dun know that his family strike leh?

as for mil, try to "kan kai".. remember they are not obliged to "take care" of us. we have to depend on ourselves lor. Sometimes it is also very difficult for them cos they scared that we view it as them "forcing" us to take tonics as some youngster dont like to take chinese med.

my mil also dun make any tonics for me, but come to think of it, we also din make any tonics for them rite?heehee..

its natural that our mothers will treat us better and anxious during our preg cos we are also more at ease at accepting wat our mothers made for us rite?

My opinion is for all adult matters, dun have to tell young children bah..cos they are innocent and dun wish to instill the idea of "hate , biased" in their pure little world..

The more we can "kan kai" the more happy we will be
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ehh girls,
how much did u all spend on si dian jin last time arr? can share?? want to knw the market rate hahahaa.

ah ger
his family really zhong nan qin nu one! last time when we start dating hor, if he's fetching his parents from their shop. I NEED TO GET OUT OF THE FRONT SEAT AND GIVE HIS DAD SIT FRONT SEAT ONE HOR. nowadays no liao lar, he will say his parents sit behind together, can talk better. Then hor, when i go malaysia with him hor, when they have those late nite suppers, guys one table, girls another tables. At times the females dun even go out, coz scared to waste husbands money. Bascially the opinion i got is the women in his clan got no say one lor. WHen his grandpa first know we getting married coz i pregnant, he say go honeymoon wedding can oredi. He guai guai listen. Only when all his friends make noise and said he shld ask my decision and instead of listening to his grandpa blindly, then got wedding dinner. the so called auspicious timing is anything after 1pm enter his house for tea ceremony. Yada Yada, auspicious for HIS family, not thinking whether my condition can take it at one go without any rush.

things that i am angry with might be insignificant issues. but i want to make my stand clear that i dun like how certain things is done
ah ger,
resturant is yio chu kang grassroots club. no time to search for hotels lor, and definitely all good hotels will be booked.
 
smurfy,

kiddly place maternity the material wise and design not really suit my liking ..

ah ger,
he he .. oh ic .. i dun like seed .. cause i find the seed is eating up the space of lotus paste ...
ha ha
i like to eat each bite with lotus paste .. he he ..
but i dun go for the super sweet lotus paste ..
just moderately sweet .. will do ..

i never tried the raffles the plaza mooncake before ...
i think all mooncakes r overpriced ..

yup .. i redeemed with sunperks points ..
but must top up 10 dollars ..
but i think marriott one got seeds ...

is okie ... i'll go alone ..
cause i think the detailed scan should be pretty soon .. then he can see bb also ...

smurfy, emicakes durian mooncake nice ?
i thought of getting one piece of durian mooncake but i dunno which brand good...
 
ah ger,
will talk to him abt the CL lady thing this weekend. tis lady from malaysia arr? what dialect group arr? quote me an estimate and whether she can come if the bb pops out b4 CNY and whether there r any differences in prices for CNY 1st few days. my mum will still be working for a while after me giving birth.

stella,
only left me and bb to fend for ourselves in their family mah, what to do?

ah ger,
emi durian cakes and durian mooncakes same one. except the outer cover different nia :p one is cream the other is snowskin
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I agree w/ Stella, watever adult matters, shld nt involve children in.

Yeah our own parents sure side us 1st mah. Imagine nx time, u sure will side ur own kid 1st then c the whole pic right?

I also dun expect MIL to always brew tonics for me. Tats y I buy things & eat myself.

Smurfy - as for the car seat. Frankly speaking, las time if we relaly hv car & fetch PILs, I will initiate asking if his dad wanna take front seat. Bt usually he will nt mind, MIL will say no need to shift here & tare. It really all depends on individuals.

As for auspicious timing, I feel it's impt, cos a wrong step may make a change. U also wish everything to b shun shun li li right? Just endure w/ it for tat day & everything is gng to b fine. PILs dun believe in getting auspicious date cos both BILs just chose a date they want. Bt I insisted. PILs said nothing, cos it's our wedd.

I can understand wedd preps can hv alot of arguements, I quarrelled w/ hb almost everyday fw mths b4 wedd, & it really hurt our r/s alot, to the ext I dun feel like seeing or hearing his voice. Bt things hv to go on. Tell urself, it's only tat dat. All will b fine after tat....

3 words to bear in mind "Give & Take"
 
Smurfy - u r asking on SDJ budget.

Actually I think this is very subjective. Bcos Family A is very generous & is rich they can afford to give their DIL like $5K SDJ. Bt for Family B, though they would like to give gd SDJ to their DIL bt they r nt wealthy enuff, they can only afford like $2k. Some families, they are poor, bt still hv to give SDJ as a form of custom, they may just spend less than $1k.

It's just a token lor, shld nt b measured in $$ terms. If we can get wat we r eyeing for, then we r lucky, bt if nt, also like tat. U know long ago, DILs dun even get to choose SDJ? Cos by right they r chosen by PILs to give the DIL. Nwadays we get to choose is already a luxury.
 
Smurfy - I dunno if she's a M'sian though. I heard my gf talking to her in Mandarin. When u discussed w/ ur hb then u let me know then I help u ask her for more details.

Bt Emicakes's shop location nt accessible right? Do u know where else has their booths?
 
ah ger,
i told him i dun wanna choose oredi since i dunno what to get when there is no budget :D. Let him headache and stress 1st kekeke.

he is very good to me lar, but he oso very good to his family until at times i feel he listen to them more. he must know things change and priorites differ then n now what. think one of the days, i will drive him crazy like the 9pm show. whahaha

ck,
personal preference, i like emi durian mooncakes
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amk central i saw one, upper serangoon road (Teck chye) there is another
 
Smurfy - let them choose lor. They can't b choosing something so orbit mah. Besides if they r those who like face, they sure wanna show also. & b prepared to wear them on ur Actual day hor.

Me, all along @ loggerheads w/ mum. Then only when close to wedd then we bcme closer. Then all along I dun like gold. Bt mum took all her gold jewelry & melt & redo a bracelet each for my sis & I for our wedd.

On my AD, w/o even her telling me to do so, I wore the bracelet, showing ppl my dowry. I want to let ppl know tat my side is nt tat han suan also. Tat day, I almost weeped cos finally 1 day I can't bear to part w/ my mum. Then on my neck, I had my SDJ to show PILs tat I wore their gifts. Tis is a form of respect.

During tea ceremony, hb's granny gave me gold w/ white gold necklace, then I wore it over my neck also lor. B it u like it or nt, when u get hme jus kip them away.
 
smurfy...

yep give and take and there will not be so much bitterness. initially i find it difficult and insist on fighting for my own rights. But since we choose to marry our husband, we have indirectly also choosen them as our parents/family. Regard them as our own parents as much as possible lor.

Some may say if they dont regard us as daughters, y shld we regard them as our parents? But it takes one party to initiate. If we want people to be good to us, we must be good to other people first. Even if they dont reprocrate, at least we do wat we can.

Some issues the elders have different viewpt, but we cant say that they are wrong also. Its just generation gap, which i believe we will face it when we are old. So long as our mil does not go overboard, shld be thankful already.

My mil also din give SDJ , but she gave me too bracelets as per hokkien customs. Its the sigificance only.. in US customs, brides have to pay all the wedding expense leh..

Hard vs hard will only result in injuries at both sides.

Dun be offended,smurfy, i am not saying that u r wrong but sometimes we step into the marriage , it is our choice and we cannot force other people to change.
 
Ah ger, can give me the CL's number? I already booked one but heard not very good comments about this lady and she is also quite old. I am paying $2500. So anything within this is fine.
 
stella,
i, is the only hard one here lar. the other hard one my boyboy lor, everything so protective of his mum.

ah ger,
i oso got much closer to my mum during this period.

tat's why looking at myself, i think having a ger oso not that bad lar. will get close with mum. boy will get sandwiched between mum and wife.
 
Yeah I agree w/ Stella. As much as u dun like them, tel urself, u r married to ur hb, nt to them. U dun intend to stay w/ them anyway. So whenever u need to, just stay as a gd DIL & I assure u there wun b any gossips behind u.

Sometimes I will also complain to hb like I dun like his parents bcos of tis tis tis/ tat tat tat. bt think again, y complain so much? He has to look after his family just like u will wanna take care of us. So he just wanna do his part as a member of the family.

So long as he doesn't overdo it, I think u shld learn to relax abit.

These are my thoughts lah......

Seems like I m very old already, cos thru these yrs, & after married, I learnt to c things in a wider & broader view.

Then think again, if u r having a boy, would u like ur son to forsake u for his wife in future? No right? So just try to give/ take lor.
 
smurfy,
My MIL bought the SDJ on her own with her friends, without consulting me. Maybe she didnt know since I am the first DIL. This time round, my SIL got to choose her own. Anyway, I didnt really like the diamond necklace that she chose for me and the diamond bracelet (the soft type with diamonds thru out) is too long for me. Until now which is about 4 yrs later already, I still havent adjusted the length which means I didnt wear it at all. But I wear the earrings and two rings that she gave me a lot though. AND since I already got my accessories for the wedding gown, I didnt wear the SDJ at all on my wedding.
 
wah cheery - ur date clash w/ Smurfy wor.........

Okie, let me chk w/ my gf. Nt sure if she can respond me on time, if nt by Mon I pass u her number can? Then u all sort tat out, I dun wanna b middle person.

Then I wun tell my gf ur budget also, so c hw much the auntie is gng to ask for lor.
 
Ah ger, me dun really feel like moon cake this yr leh... Gio doesnt have the drawstring pants anymore hor? I also same thinking as you... as long as it's not at home, it's ok to take beef.

smurfy, same here... my hb also said that pray guan yin cant take beef but I still take outside without him lah. I think maternity wear at Kiddy Palace also not bad. Think CL during CNY cost abt $2.5k leh, and you still got to give her red pkts which can come up to abt $2.8k. I didnt ask from my mil any si dian jin leh. We bot with our own money.

stella, it's true that we shd 'kan kai' to live happily
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Also, own mom and mil are always different lor. Stimes mil may mean well but cos of communication breakdown, we may understand their intention. That's why I feel hb plays a very impt part to be the bridge.
 
haiz,
too bad marriage does not involves just 2 person, but oso the families.

think i will handle the CL issue after WD lar. most he ask his auntie from malaysia out to help out lor.
 
Gig - tis yr I also seldom eat mooncake, dunno y. Bt it seems like ever since I m weight conscious, I dun take so much of all these incl CNY goodies. :p

Even ig Gio has drawstring pants, they r nt stretchable, then end up u may need to put them aside if ur butt expands. I've nv bought their drawstrings b4, so I dunno.

Yeah - some couples buy their own jewelry bt PILs said they must buy cos MIL is a Teochew, so she said must b fair cos 1st 2 had. Then me being the last DIL, I was given the highest budget. I din ask hw much they r willing to fork out, MIL just followed us to Lee Hwa then she c c c lor. I chose cheaper one she said nt as nice. So I earn lor. :p Bt also total up ard 2+.

Yeah, I do agree, we r used to mum's tone & wat she means, so when MIL said something she may nt mean tat bt we interpret it wrongly. So hb has to step in & b the peacemaker. Ha ha ha.....
 
Smurfy - if he has somebody to help u out then better still, CL fees may nt b so exp also. Afterall is own family ppl.
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Yeah, dun pile up all ur worries, prep for wedd 1st.
 
my parents both teochew arr. for guo da li, they even request for raw pig legs and 2.5kg pork. whahahaha beri funni.

but that someone to help is auntie leh. cannot complain even if they dun do well. then their dialect group - Heng Hwa. food all taste funni leh.
 
smurfy - my PILs also wana give bt then my mum said dun want! So all replc w/ AP $$ lor. Then I m a Cantonese, by right shld hv suckling pig. Bt mum doesn't want, say give AP in rtn. So end up during GDL & AD, everything all in AP, so neat & tidy.
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smurfy, you're rite lor... marriage involves 2 families...
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I rem my mom rqt for sugar canes and got to tie to the bridal car somemore. I nearly fainted when she said that on the wedding day itself. But I just kept my cool and let them talked to the driver. Even my photographer asked why our families so traditional??? He never came across most of the things that my mil or mom did on my wedding day. But it's over now lah... I just kept telling myself that they did all those things for our own good lor. Basically the old folks want us to have a happy marriage afterall.

Ah ger, ya lor... hb used to be my interpretor for his mom. He'd try to explain to me what his mum actually meant when I complained abt his mom. At least, he gave me a chance to understand my mil better. I feel that it's better lor. Unlike some hb, they just keep telling their wives to bear with their mum and ignore the issues.
 
Actually SDJ is just a formality, after the big day. All are kept in the safe. Never wear, never touch & never see. come to think of it quite a waste of $$$. Maybe next time we can give to our children as a gift when they get marry....ha...ha.....chuan jia zi bao

all these tradition will be gone when our children gonna get marry.
 
Gig - yeah, parents only want things to b done is all for our own gd. So I din grumble anything @ all.

tat time my fren told me in my sewing kit, tie a red ribbon over the pair of scissors, must b tied by mum so tat MIL wun b those naggy type. So I asked mum to do it lor. Then mum also did. Tats when I felt we r mother & daughter. :p

Gig - my hb also. Tat time I complained abt smething then he explained to me. Bt I wasn't very happy w/ the explanation, I said "still she she shld nt tell me tat, cos I hv auto in me!" Hb had no choice bt to just kip quiet. :p

Mine 21wks is supp to be abt 27cm. Tats almost the size of a 30cm ruler. :p
 
whahhaah 27cm? i am expecting up to 15cm tomorow at 19wks.

oh u all ever feel ur tummy lope-sided nowadays? got one day i tot my tummy bigger and pointed on the left side only hahaha
 
SDJ is just a token frm the groom's family to the DIL, so tat they dun get married into the family w/o anything. I still wear them - for occassions like CNY, dinner.
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Smurfy - yes, I tot maybe the most like 22 or 23cm. Cos 19wks is abt 15cm, then suddenly I read 21wks is abt 27cm, then 22wks is slightly over 27cm, so shld b abt 30cm lor.

Loop sided? yes, bt nt veyyr obvious, bt is left side more protruding then right side.
 
ah ger,

there's one emicakes outlet at suntec ...
is near to carrefour side there ...

smurfy,

as for the SDJ .. i din get from my MIL also ..
we din go through customary ..
only rom last year 1 Oct ...
my ROM is like mini wedding .. 4 tables at amara pool side ..
everything foot by me and hubby ..
decor also by me and hubby ..
sometimes is better not to expect ...
then you'll feel better
 
ah ger, its ok, will let smurfy decide if she wants the CL first since she hasnt found one. If she doesnt want then I will call this auntie. My friend gave me the contact of Zoe and Ivy lee's CL, she said very good but I also havent called.
 


Ck - is it????????? Suntec? Hmm........ ok, I will try go & chk it out. C if hb wanna go shopping 2mr b4 gng to PIL hse. I brought my BK coupons back cos just nw wanted to eat bt I tot maybe hb is keen also. W/ the coupon, if I buy Chkn sandwich meal $4.95, I can tear either the free taro turnover or the cheesesticks or chkn tender. :p

Ck - yeah, sometimes if u pay for everything, infact u will feel even more proud!
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